Jungkook pounces from where he’s sitting next to Seokjin on the floor, bowling him over and crushing him under his weight. It’s movie night, they’re scattered around the living room watching whatever it is Jimin has picked, Jungkook’s not sure because he hasn’t been paying attention. There's no real reason to suddenly attack his hyung, no reason he can explain easily anyway. He just needs to release some of the one sided tension that's been building all day.
It started when Jungkook ran into Seokjin in the hall after his shower, towel secured around his waist, water tracing down his broad chest. It had made Jungkook’s mouth go dry, made him want to wet his tongue by lapping at the errant droplets, made his brain feel buzzy and confused like it so often did when it came to Seokjin.
He managed to survive that only to be the center of Seokjin’s attention during dance practice, Seokjin teasing him for how much better he’d gotten at rolling his hips in their new choreo, and Jungkook had blushed until he was almost purple, unable to run and hide this time.
And now, Seokjin hadn’t been doing anything, just sitting next to him on the floor in the darkened living room, Seokjin watching the movie while Jungkook helplessly watched him.
“When did you get so heavy, what are you made of?” Seokjin wheezes, trying to wriggle out from under Jungkook who attempts to flatten him. Jungkook doesn’t answer either, drapes himself over every inch of Seokjin and pretends to snore in his ear.
Yoongi makes a sound of annoyance at their antics and bumps the volume up on the TV a few notches, and Jimin pulls his feet out of the way since they’re practically on top of him, but this is nothing out of the ordinary for them, so no one else really reacts at all.
The sound Jungkook makes when Seokjin finally rolls them over is undignified to say the least, something between a squeak and a squawk. And now Seokjin’s laying in the vee of his open thighs, and Jungkook wants to hit pause so he can sort all of this out because he’s inundated with a barrage of feelings.
Not new feelings, not by a longshot, but something up until now he’s been a hell of a lot better at hiding.
“Doesn’t mean I can’t still best you,” Seokjin smirks, face inches from Jungkook’s, and Jungkook blinks wide eyed up at him at a complete loss for words. But his brain clicks back into gear when he realizes that fuck - oh fuck - his body is liking this, likes having Seokjin pressed here, and Seokjin’s about to know that, too, if he were to shift just a little, he’d know just how much.
Jungkook manages to slide out from under Seokjin’s arms where they bracket his head and he stands on suddenly wobbly legs, pulling his shirt down as much as he can to hide the prominent bulge and practically runs to his room.
He can hear Seokjin yelling after him. “There’s no shame in losing to hyung! You don’t have to hide!”
Jungkook shuts the door to his room and locks it, checks it again, unlocks it, relocks it. Okay, he’s safe, he’s alone, and he’s breathing like he just ran a marathon. He glares down at his traitorous dick, squeezing it through his pants as if that will make his boner go away, but instead he feels like his knees are going to buckle and he leans back against his door.
“He’s our hyung,” he tells his cock, as if he could talk some sense into his horniness. He staggers over to his bed and flops down face first, but that’s not going to work because the pressure feels too good, the urge to rut against his mattress while he thinks of Seokjin is too much.
He rolls onto his back, staring up at his ceiling and trying to think unsexy thoughts, because he is not going to touch himself right now, nope, not happening, not while his brain is still circling the thought of Seokjin between his spread thighs.
He whimpers in distress and grips handfuls of his sheets, tries some deep breathing. He’s no stranger to an unwanted hard on, but he’s never had one so unwanted before. This can’t happen. So maybe he’s thought about him when he’s alone, but that was always a secret just for him, and he’s mortified because he was just turned on when he was actually with him, which. There’s a line, and he’s blatantly crossed it with no regard for how that might make the line feel. Not that the line noticed, but still. He feels like he’s violated their friendship or something, and what they have is unique. He doesn’t want to fuck that up.
Luckily guilt is an incredible boner killer and he sighs with relief, disengaging his death grip on his bedding.
It probably doesn’t mean anything, he tries to tell himself. He’s just horny, that’s all it is, and his poor Jin-hyung just happened to be the one who ended up between his legs, no big deal. He would’ve gotten turned on if it were anyone, really, so there’s no need to dwell on it.
Except that he keeps rolling it over again in his mind while he tries to sleep that night. He can’t outrun his own thoughts and he knows, he knows that the way he feels about Seokjin isn’t like his other crushes. He sighs in defeat but with resolve that nothing like that will happen again and he’ll get his feelings under control.
Jungkook's not sure when exactly he felt comfortable enough with Seokjin that they settled into the seemingly chaotic dynamic they share, but it definitely became a lot more physical as Jungkook started to hit his growth spurt. They're playful relationship guided them easily into pretend fights, wrestling matches. Jungkook was so young when they debuted, he was still getting a handle on himself, who he was, how to interact with others.
It was easy with Seokjin, or maybe Seokjin made it easy. He welcomed Jungkook however he was, gave him space to grow up, a license to be silly when sometimes what they had to do was a lot, almost too big for a kid. Jungkook was always grateful for that.
As much as he chose to deny it, there was something else that shifted when he got older, his feelings morphing into something he wasn't mature enough to fully understand except he knew they could be dangerous, so he hid them, tucked them away with the promise to revisit them later.
Those feelings, along with struggling through puberty in front of his six hyungs made things more complicated, and he fought that off too, until his brain would betray him in his sleep and he'd wake up sweaty and sticky and feeling overwhelmingly guilty.
Jungkook expressed himself in the only way he knew how when it came to Seokjin; through headlocks and ever more impressive displays of his budding physical prowess.
Major crush on Seokjin acting up? Pick him up. Push him into a wall. Challenge him to a duel. Anything to alleviate the need for physical contact under the guise of playing.
And it had worked so well, until it didn’t.
Jungkook’s good at a lot of things, naturally gifted maybe, He works hard, of course he does, and when he makes a mistake he has a really difficult time letting it go. Which is why he can’t look Seokjin in the eye, because despite the fact that Seokjin doesn’t know he popped a super inappropriate boner while they were wrestling, he still feels terrible about it.
Whereas Jungkook would normally back hug Seokjin, or roughhouse with him, he keeps a respectable distance and stares at his ear instead of his face when they talk over breakfast because what if Seokjin can see just what a pervert he is by looking in his eyes?
“Are you even listening to me?” Seokjin gripes, and Jungkook studies the tiny pinprick hole in his earlobe where he seldom wears jewelry anymore.
“Of course hyung,” Jungkook says enthusiastically.
“Is there someone behind me?” Seokjin presses.
“Then what are you looking at?” Seokjin snaps, and he reaches across the table, planting his palm firmly over Jungkook’s pec, and shoves him.
“I-” Jungkook starts, trying to right himself after being half pushed off his chair, and he stares at Seokjin’s chest instead.
“Eyes up here, Kook-ah,” Seokjin deadpans and Jungkook supposes he can’t look past Seokjin forever so he flits his gaze up to Seokjin’s face, and takes in his delighted expression, but then Seokjin’s eyes narrow dangerously, and Jungkook feels like he’s giving away everything. “What’s wrong with you?”
“Nothing hyung. I’m hungry, is all,” Jungkook lies, and he’s terrible at it, always has been. Seokjin’s eyes are practically closed now as he regards Jungkook and his flimsy excuse. Without dropping his stare he shoves his half eaten plate of food across the table at Jungkook.
“Eat up, then,” he says, and it’s heavy with suspicion. Jungkook fumbles with the chopsticks at first but does his best attempt at acting normal while he eats under the surveillance of his hyung. He cleans the plate, sets the chopsticks across it, and dares to peek up at Seokjin’s face.
There’s something there that makes Jungkook’s stomach twist, something knowing maybe, and Jungkook wishes the floor would open up and devour him. Because there’s something in Seokjin’s eyes that suggests that maybe he’d like to devour Jungkook instead, and Jungkook visibly shudders. He must be imagining it.
“Are you cold, JK?” Seokjin asks with no real concern behind it, as if he knows that’s not what’s going on.
“No,” Jungkook answers.
“Are you sure? Do you need hyung to warm you up?” Seokjin presses and Jungkook’s vaguely aware that his mouth has dropped open. He suddenly feels very, very warm. In fact he thinks there’s sweat beading at his temples, he feels it trickle down his back under his shirt.
“On second thought, you look kind of feverish,” Seokjin says steadily, and he reaches across the table to place the back of his hand against Jungkook’s forehead. “Yeah, you’re burning up. Maybe you should go lie down.”
“Hyung I’m fine-” Jungkook starts.
“No, I won’t hear it! I insist you go to bed,” Seokjin orders, and he rounds the table to wedge his arms into Jungkook’s armpits and yanks him out of his chair. Jungkook goes into deadweight mode and Seokjin does his best to drag him down the hall until he has to drop him ungracefully to the floor. "Okay seriously, you're too heavy. Come on, up! To bed!"
"We have a schedule today, I can't just go back to bed," Jungkook counters from where he lays.
"Are you sure you're well enough? You seem to be in distress," Seokjin presses.
"Hyung I'm fine," Jungkook assures him.
"Maybe it's something I did then? Because you're being even weirder than usual," Seokjin wants to know, and Jungkook swallows hard, tries to think of an excuse.
"Of course not, everything's fine."
Seokjin shrugs and reaches down to grab Jungkook's ankle to drag him further down the hall. "Better get ready for your day then, come on!"
The day is incredibly long and Jungkook passes out right after his shower. There's no schedule tomorrow so he indulges himself by not setting an alarm. He's still nestled deep under his blankets late into the morning.
“Hey, are you awake?” Seokjin asks quietly, knocking on the door while peeking his head into Jungkook’s room simultaneously.
“Mmmm,” Jungkook hums by way of answer, because he wasn’t, honestly. Having a rare day off means he was content to spend half of it asleep. His eyes are barely open but he can see Seokjin enter the room and feels the bed dip below his weight when he sits on the edge.
“We’re going to order lunch, I thought you might want something,” Seokjin says, running his hand through Jungkook’s hair gently. Jungkook leans into the touch happily. “Can we get you something?”
“You know what I like, hyung,” Jungkook mumbles sleepily. “And thanks for paying.”
“Ya, who said anything about me buying you lunch?” Seokjin fakes outrage, his hand tugging Jungkook’s hair instead which thrums dull arousal in him. He doesn’t have time to dwell on it though because now Seokjin’s pinching his sides, tickling him, his fingers dancing under Jungkook’s sheet to graze his bare skin.
Jungkook has to bite down on a moan that tries to spill past his lips. He was half hard when he woke up and this is definitely not helping. Jungkook struggles to grab Seokjin’s hands to get them away but Seokjin takes it for more of their usual play fighting.
It feels like slow motion, Jungkook already trying to discreetly hide where the sheet is tented, and Seokjin’s hand slipping from his grasp and accidentally palming across his dick.
“Hyung no, don’t-” Jungkook tries to warn, but it’s too late.
“Oh,” Seokjin gasps in shock, suddenly sitting up very straight, away from Jungkook. Jungkook covers his burning face with both hands, eyes squeezed shut so tightly as if that would make Seokjin disappear from his room.
“It’s fine,” Seokjin says, but Jungkook can hear the waver in it, knows that he caused that, he made his hyung uncomfortable and that kills him, makes the guilt he already wades through everyday swell up and swallow him.
“It’s not,” Jungkook practically wails, though the noise is easily muffled by the handful of bed sheets he’s balled up in his fists and is pressing to his mouth.
“Totally normal. Happens to everyone,” Seokjin continues.
“Not when you’re 23,” Jungkook whines pathetically.
“I mean, I don’t blame you. With my good looks, it’s something I constantly have to-”
“Hyung, can you please just leave me here to die of shame?” Jungkook begs, and he fights like hell when Seokjin tries to pull his arms down and away from his face. “Let go!”
“I really think we should talk about this,” Seokjin presses, and he puts all of his effort into wrenching at Jungkook’s arms. “Why are you so strong? Stop it!”
“There’s nothing to talk about, I'm just a sick weirdo now please go away!” Jungkook argues, throwing all of his weight into disengaging Seokjin, who lets go suddenly. Jungkook ends up rolling off the bed and falling on the floor. “Ow.”
“Are you okay?” Seokjin asks, peeking over the edge of the mattress.
“Did you land on your boner?” he follows up and Jungkook groans in despair.
Jungkook makes no attempt to get up, just rolls onto his face and presses his cheek against the wood floor. He chances another look up and Seokjin’s resting his chin on his crossed arms. “You’re still here.”
“And this is where I’m going to stay until we talk,” Seokjin confirms, and he sounds serious now, which Jungkook isn’t sure he necessarily prefers. Jungkook finally peels himself up from the ground and leans his back against the bed, tucking his knees up under his chin.
“I don’t know what you want me to say,” Jungkook says quietly.
“I just don’t want you to feel guilty or weird over something that’s- you didn’t do anything wrong,” Seokjin tells him evenly.
It’s like being handed a get out of jail free card, all he has to do is agree, say something like you’re right, thanks hyung and Seokjin will feel like he’s done his job by talking it out and Jungkook can deny that something else is going on.
Apparently his lack of concurrence speaks volumes and Seokjin quietly asks, “Did you do something wrong?”
“I didn’t mean to, hyung! I tried not to- to think like that, I thought if I ignored it, it would go away!” Jungkook forces out.
“Think like what?” Seokjin urges, his voice heavier, deeper.
Jungkook lowers his head. “You know. Like that.” He can’t even say it, but Seokjin has to know what he means, because he accidentally discovered Jungkook’s shameful secret in the most embarrassing way possible.
“It’s okay to have those kinds of feelings-” Seokjin starts and Jungkook whines, pressing his hands over his ears. “Jungkookie, I’m not mad at you or anything.”
Maybe this is fine. Maybe they’ll have this talk, whatever it is, and Seokjin will feel accomplished and will think that the problem is solved. And Jungkook can go back to doing what he was before, trying and failing not to have feelings for his hyung.
“Hey,” Seokjin says, pulling Jungkook from his thoughts. Seokjin drapes his arm over the bed and grips Jungkook’s shoulder, jostling him playfully. “It’s seriously okay.”
“What if the feelings don’t go away?” Jungkook risks asking, and it sounds pathetic even to his own ears.
Seokjin’s sliding off the bed to sit next to him and Jungkook quickly tucks his head down to avoid his eyes. “JK, are these feelings… are they general, or…” he trails off.
Jungkook answers by whimpering pathetically and when he tries to turn away Seokjin catches him at the elbow and won’t let go. “Hyung please,” Jungkook begs, because he’s not above that right now.
“Okay,” Seokjin says, and he squeezes Jungkook’s arm lightly before he lets go. “Okay,” he repeats, and Jungkook doesn’t look but he feels Seokjin brush against him as he stands, hears his feet against the wood panels, and the sound of the door closing behind him.
Things shift, not enough for anyone else to notice, but cosmically for Jungkook. Seokjin’s eyes linger a little longer than they used to, and something in his gaze is unreadable to Jungkook. He knows what he wants to see but he’s so careful not to find it when it's not there.
It's late and they've stayed up playing video games, and Jungkook's surprised they haven't been yelled at yet by one of the others because they're being loud and obnoxious about their competition.
"Well now that I've won," Jungkook starts, stranding from the couch and stretching, "I think I'll call it a night."
"You may have won that last round but I think we know who the overall winner was," Seokjin amends, poking Jungkook in the exposed bit of his stomach that peeks out when he raises his arms over his head.
"Hyung your memory seems to be going, you can't be serious."
Seokjin stands, swatting at Jungkook. "Excuse you?" Seokjin jabs him in the belly now.
“Hey, no!” Jungkook laughs through his protest and Seokjin secures his wrists, pins them behind his back and crowds him up against the wall which cuts his laughter off abruptly and he has to fight to contain a gasp.
“Giving up so easily?” Seokjin asks, voice low and quiet, and Jungkook might be able to control any vocalizations but he can’t stop the full body shudder that wracks him. Jungkook knows the right thing to do is put up a fight, at least attempt to struggle, but even when he does and Seokjin holds fast his blush rushes over him like wildfire.
“Hyung,” Jungkook whines instead, and ends up tucking his heated face into Seokjin’s neck.
“Fuck,” Seokjin swears and his breath ghosts over Jungkook’s ear. Jungkook can feel the rapid rise and fall of Seokjin’s chest, and his hands loosen their grip over his wrists but slide easily against his palms, fingers lacing together.
Jungkook stops breathing, stops moving, but his brain is doing laps around his skull and it’s making him dizzy. Or maybe it’s the proximity of Seokjin’s perfect lips that have him so lightheaded.
Seokjin pulls back just enough to knock their heads together, the light jolt of pain defogging Jungkook’s thoughts a little, but then Seokjin is pressing their foreheads together and moving in, then back, then he’s brushing his lips against Jungkook’s. It’s barely contact, Jungkook’s not sure he’d even define it as a kiss, which maybe makes this safer, like they can claim temporary insanity or something if it’s just this.
But desperate want surges through Jungkook and he’s pushing into it and sealing their mouths together. Seokjin drops his hands and desire is replaced with momentary panic in Jungkook before Seokjin is cupping his cheeks and kissing him gently. It’s a sharp contrast to their usual roughhousing and Jungkook visibly wobbles but Seokjin has him, holds him, backs him all the way against the wall to help keep him upright.
Jungkook feels like he should say something, or Seokjin will say something, but instead Seokjin runs his tongue along the seam of Jungkook’s lips and in a way he’s never been so obedient before Jungkook opens to him.
Like a switch is flipped, Seokjin suddenly has his hands on Jungkook’s hips and he’s licking into Jungkook’s mouth as if he was the one who’d been thinking about this nonstop. There’s no room for him to get closer with the way they’re pressed together and yet somehow Seokjin does, and Jungkook moans into his mouth.
That seems to bring Seokjin back to reality and he pulls away, alarm bells blaring in Jungkook’s ears as he does, but Seokjin grabs his hand again and pulls him roughly down the hall to his room.
“Hyung,” Jungkook manages but he can’t expand on that because Seokjin has him shoved up against the closed door and he’s pressing a brutal kiss to Jungkook’s lips. The intensity is borderline panic inducing and Jungkook struggles between wanting to surrender completely or hold Seokjin at arm’s length so that they can talk about this.
“Should we be-” he tries again but Seokjin’s mouthing over his jaw, teeth scraping his neck, and Jungkook is rendered speechless, can only moan in response. Seokjin’s suddenly palming him through his pants and his hips buck forward into it. “Holy fuck.”
“Is this okay?” Seokjin whispers into Jungkook’s skin and he nods quickly, hands finally coming up to grip Seokjin’s broad shoulders. “God you’re so hard.”
Jungkook moans again, feels like maybe he should be embarrassed about that or something but it’s difficult to make room for any sensation other than being so turned on he’s afraid he might pass out.
“I’d like to think this is all for me but somehow I doubt it,” Seokjin half teases but Jungkook’s shaking his head now.
“Hyung, no, it is-” Jungkook starts but Seokjin is chuckling at him. “Why are you laughing?”
“As flattering as I think you’re trying to be I get the impression it doesn’t take much to get your dick hard,” Seokjin jokes and Jungkook shoves him back enough so that he can see his obvious pout.
“What do I have to do to prove it to you?” Jungkook asks, a challenge, but Seokjin is already trying to brush him off like the attention, the reality that Jungkook wants him is a little too much. Jungkook catches Seokjin’s eyes and he holds them, won’t look away even as he’s sinking to his knees in front of him.
“Uh, what are you-” Seokjin tries but he loses all traction in speaking when Jungkook’s shaking hands pop the button on his jeans, tugging down the zipper. “Whoa, JK, I-”
“Don’t you want me to?” Jungkook asks, his wide eyes on Seokjin. Seokjin looks utterly conflicted, eyebrows drawn together and mouth in a slight frown which isn’t giving Jungkook the affirmation he was hoping for. He drops his hand from Seokjin’s fly, pulling his lower lip between his teeth to worry the skin, and he rocks back off his knees to slump against the door. “You don’t.”
“What?” Seokjin practically shouts, moving to sit cross legged in front of Jungkook. “I want you to, I- I want a lot of things, but I don’t want to take advantage-”
“You’re not!” Jungkook quickly interrupts.
Seokjin looks at him so fondly that it makes his chest ache. “It’s… more complicated than just this,” he says with a smile, but it looks kind of sad and Jungkook doesn’t think before he’s reaching out to cup Seokjin’s cheek. Seokjin leans into the touch, a level of tenderness they often escape with playground flirting, but Jungkook only hesitates for a second before he’s pushing forward and kissing Seokjin again. They get lost in it for a moment before Jungkook pulls back.
“We don’t have to do anything, hyung. I guess I thought you- it doesn’t matter, I just want you to feel good, whatever that means,” Jungkook offers evenly.
“I didn’t mean to ruin the moment,” Seokjin says with a laugh that echoes so hollow it’s almost painful.
Jungkook stands and reaches for Seokjin’s hand, which he offers after a second, and Jungkook pulls him to his feet and herds him toward his bed, shoving him back onto the mattress then aggressively arranging him there so that Jungkook can tuck into his side. Jungkook throws a leg over him and snuggles forcefully into Seokjin’s shoulder.
“You didn’t ruin anything,” he makes clear.
“Your dick is still digging into my hip,” Seokjin points out.
Jungkook shrugs. “It’ll go away.”
“I’m sor-” Seokjin starts but Jungkook slaps his hand over his mouth.
“Don’t you dare. If not sucking your dick is how I show you that… that it’s you, not just- whatever. I’ll do whatever you want, hyung,” Jungkook says. He feels Seokjin’s lips press against his palm. “I can wait. Oh, I don’t- I mean we don’t have to, like, do anything, ever, if you don’t want!” he quickly amends.
He can feel Seokjin’s laughter through his chest and it makes him smile, and he pulls his hand away. “Okay, Jungkookie. Thank you.”
Jungkook has so many more unanswered questions swirling in his brain than he did thirty minutes ago. He knows how he feels about Seokjin, but he’s saturated in uncertainty about how his hyung feels about him. It seems like he wanted him, but then he threw the brakes on so hard Jungkook got whiplash.
They lay there in silence until Jungkook realizes Seokjin’s fallen asleep, and he curls tighter against him, pressing a kiss to his collarbone before he tries to drift off himself.
Jungkook wakes up alone and it’s like a kick to the chest, He rolls onto his face and is ambushed by Seokjin’s scent clinging to his pillow, making his heart ache in such an acute way he wonders if anyone’s ever died from this kind of unrequited love.
There are things he has to do today, like training with his boxing coach, a meeting at the company, probably some kind of promo he’s sure, but he just wants to stay in his bed and breathe in the lingering traces of Seokjin’s shampoo.
Instead he rolls out of bed with a grumble, dragging himself down the hall to the bathroom to piss and brush his teeth. On his way back to his room to change for his boxing lesson he encounters Seokjin, who playfully steps in his way.
“Good morning!” he says cheerfully. Jungkook blinks at him a few times, contemplating yelling at him for leaving him alone in bed, or maybe even dragging him into his room and kissing him senseless. “Sleep okay?”
“You left,” Jungkook answers simply, and he can’t help it if there’s a hint of displeasure in it.
Seokjin frowns. “Oh, I- sorry, I didn’t know.”
Jungkook shrugs - again, maybe borderline petulant - and tries to get past Seokjin to his room.
“Hey,” Seokjin says quietly, catching Jungkook by the upper arms. “I’m sorry,” he repeats.
Jungkook finally meets his eyes. “It’s whatever,” he dismisses it, then shakes free of Seokjin’s hold and closes himself in his room.
So maybe it’s not whatever, maybe his stupid feelings are hurt and he’s being a brat about it. He doesn’t have time to settle into it though because as he’s pulling his t-shirt over his head he hears his door open, and once his face is clear of the material he’s registering Seokjin standing there and crossing his arms over his chest.
Jungkook catches the way Seokjin’s eyes flit almost imperceptibly to his bare chest - which he’s seen a zillion times before - and then he glares at Jungkook.
Seokjin approaches fast and pokes a crooked finger in between Jungkook’s pecs. “It’s whatever?”
Jungkook keeps his eyes trained on the spot where Seokjin’s fingertip creates the slightest indent in his skin until Seokjin withdraws it. “You could have stayed.”
“Are you upset that I didn’t?” Seokjin asks.
Jungkook meets his eyes and hesitantly nods, the intensity of Seokjin’s gaze quickly unsettling him, and he breaks in favor of staring at his feet. Seokjin grips Jungkook’s chin and tilts his head up.
“Jungkook, I… I don’t know what I’m doing,” Seokjin admits softly. “I thought that if I stayed, then maybe when you woke up I’d want to kiss you, but I didn’t know if you- I don’t want to do anything-”
It only takes one big step to close the space between them, only one deep breath to steady him enough in his decision to crush his lips to Seokjin’s.
It feels different doing this in the daylight, with his head free of the desperate lust from last night. He needs to be clear; he knows what he wants, and what he wants is Seokjin. Seokjin pulls back a fraction of a centimeter and Jungkook whines loudly against his lips, making Seokjin laugh.
“Okay, it’s becoming a little more obvious what you want,” Seokjin says and Jungkook can’t help but swoop back in for another kiss.
“Only you, hyung,” Jungkook murmurs when they break apart again, and Seokjin’s arms snake around his waist and haul him in closer. Seokjin buries his face in the junction of Jungkook’s shoulder and neck, his exhale tickling against Jungkook’s skin.
“It’s a busy day,” he mumbles, raising goosebumps in the wake of the brush of his lips. Jungkook fights to contain a moan, now’s not the time for his stupid hormones to ruin everything again. “I should let you get ready.”
Jungkook’s got to let go, he knows, but he doesn’t want to. Before he does, he presses another desperate kiss to Seokjin’s lips, trying to convey his sincerity, his conviction that Seokjin is all he wants. “Later?” he asks hopefully.
Seokjin finally breaks, all restraint cast to the wind as he grips Jungkook tightly, licking into his mouth and leaving him gasping. “Yeah. Yes. Later.”
“You’d better come back,” Jungkook says and he can hear the tinge of apprehension, the substantial heft of his neediness, and it makes him ashamed.
But Seokjin has his hand resting on the back of Jungkook’s neck, squeezing lightly, and it’s reassuring, calms the frenzy stirring in Jungkook’s chest. “Definitely.”
Jungkook has his TV on but he’s not absorbing any of the information flickering out at him. It’s getting late, just past 10, and he’s pretty sure at this point Seokjin isn’t coming. Of course he’s not, how could Jungkook have been so stupidly optimistic? Seokjin had the whole day to come up with reasons that this was a bad idea and Jungkook’s brain settles into shallow misery.
It’s been a long day, he’s physically and mentally exhausted, and this is just one more thing he can’t manage to handle properly. He punches his pillow into shape and curls up against it, letting himself drift out of consciousness.
Jungkook stirs when he hears the sound of his door closing, keeps his eyes pressed shut when he feels his mattress dip, already dreading having to get up for the day. “What time is it?” he asks, no matter who it is that’s come to wake him.
“Just after midnight,” Seokjin says, and Jungkook blinks, tries to clear the grogginess from his head. “Hey.”
“I thought you weren’t coming,” Jungkook tells him, voice low and rough with sleep.
“Me too,” Seokjin admits and Jungkook’s eyes widen at the confession.
“You shouldn’t have, if you don’t want to be here-”
“Whoa,” Seokjin interrupts. “I want to be here.”
“Jungkookie,” Seokjin whispers, shifting on the bed to lay next to Jungkook but he doesn’t touch him, not even a little, not even by accident. “I’m just not sure what you want from me.”
“What are you willing to give me?” Jungkook asks, rolling onto his side so he can watch Seokjin’s stoic profile.
Seokjin hesitates, and Jungkook sees his Adam’s apple bob heavily. “Whatever you want,” he finally manages.
“I don’t want anything you’re not comfortable with,” Jungkook clarifies, because he has a feeling Seokjin would bend to him completely and he’s terrified of pushing him too far. “Hyung it’s not too late, we don't have to-”
“The thing is,” Seokjin cuts in, a slight tremor in his voice that settles like lead in Jungkook’s belly, “the thing is that I, ah, may have certain feelings, and that complicates things, because if you just want to fuck around or whatever that’s fine but I’m worried, because-”
“-these feelings have been- I’m not honestly sure when, but it doesn’t matter because they exist, and it wouldn’t be fair of me to go forward without telling you-”
Jungkook rolls on top of Seokjin, knocking the air out of him with a soft oof which he catches on his lips before he slots their mouths together and kisses Seokjin with such intensity it makes him see stars.
“Yeah,” Jungkook says once they pull apart. “Me too.”
“You too?” Seokjin slowly utters, staring up at Jungkook. His hands are resting gently, unassumingly on Jungkook’s hips.
“I have feelings, hyung. I mean, for you,” Jungkook reveals shyly, then he buries his face into Seokjin’s neck. Even though Seokjin’s just told him - it’s mutual - he’s still vaguely frightened to be so honest, to let out a secret he’s been keeping for so long.
“Not just horny feelings?” Seokjin asks, but he’s trying to suppress a smile like he already knows the answer. “Because you’re kind of, um, digging into my hip here.”
Jungkook groans in embarrassment and falls back onto his side of the bed, throwing his arm over his eyes.
“Hey, it’s flattering, okay? But you were saying something,” Seokjin tries to prompt him. “About feelings?”
"Yeah," Jungkook half whines, suddenly overwhelmed with self-consciousness about coming clean.
"You don't have to say anything, JK, I shouldn't push," Seokjin soothes him. Jungkook blindly runs his hand over the sheet until he finds Seokjin's and he squeezes it. "It's not a prerequisite for me touching your dick."
"Hyung," Jungkook complains, face flushing deep crimson but still hidden in the crook of his arm.
Seokjin rolls closer, the heat of his body almost burning against Jungkook's bare chest, and Jungkook pulls him tighter against his side. Seokjin's fingers graze over his belly, down his sides making him squirm. "So handsome. Don't be shy, JK."
Jungkook moves his arm from in front of his face and turns his head to look at Seokjin, who takes the opportunity to press their lips together. It’s seemingly without agenda until Seokjin's thumb rubs over Jungkook's nipple and he's whimpering into Seokjin's mouth, biting his lower lip.
"Please," he asks, not sure for what, but anything at this point is good, more light touches teasing him or something else, some kind of relief. He's not completely prepared for the weight of Seokjin's palm on his dick, squeezing lightly through his sweatpants. He arches into it desperately, has a fleeting thought of being ashamed at his eagerness until he catches Seokjin's corresponding moan.
Seokjin doesn't waste any time, easing his hand under the waistband, skin on skin at last and Jungkook feels him spread the wetness down from his tip, dragging a full body shudder out of him. "Fuck."
"Want you so much," Jungkook murmurs, driving the point home, and this time it's Seokjin's body that trembles. Jungkook gasps when Seokjin's hips press against his, and he’s just as hard. "Hyung, can you- like the other day, come here, please?" Jungkook tries, and when Seokjin doesn't move Jungkook manhandles him where he wants him. Seokjin has to pull his hand free of Jungkook pants as Jungkook wrestles him into the vee of his spread thighs, and almost immediately he's gripping Seokjin's ass and rutting up for friction, to feel Seokjin's arousal against his own.
Seokjin is suddenly moving, driving his hips down, pressing his lips to Jungkook's throat. Jungkook feels awash in Seokjin's desire and he tilts his head to expose more skin for Seokjin to graze with his teeth, to suck on.
“Fuck,” Seokjin says again, a hand coming down to cup Jungkook’s ass, to pull him closer. “I can’t believe you want this.” Jungkook moans and spreads his thighs wider and Seokjin’s shaking against him. “What do you want?”
“I already told you, whatever you would give me,” Jungkook tells him quietly, like a secret, like he’s somehow telling Seokjin everything through that confession.
If the look on Seokjin’s face is anything to go off of, maybe he did. Seokjin’s kissing him again like he needs him as much as he needs oxygen and it’s making Jungkook dizzy, along with the intense friction where he’s still rutting down on him. “Right now I just want to make you come,” Seokjin admits, voice low.
“Oh god,” Jungkook whimpers, and at the rate this is going, that's going to be an easy goal to hit. “Yeah, okay. Yes. That- that sounds great,” he babbles and Seokjin’s smile curves against his throat.
“Would it be okay if I sucked your dick?” Seokjin teases and Jungkook gasps, hips stuttering against Seokjin’s. “I’ll take that as a yes.”
Seokjin starts to travel down, stopping to suck a bruise on Jungkook’s collarbone, to mouth over his nipples, pressing his lips over the jut of Jungkook’s hip, and Jungkook fists the sheets like he’s holding on for dear life.
Seokjin tugs at his sweatpants until Jungkook lifts his hips so they can be pulled down and off and Seokjin settles between his legs, kissing the insides of his thighs and making Jungkook squirm. The proximity of Seokjin’s mouth to his dick is making him equal parts nervous and excited.
The noise he makes when Seokjin wraps his hand around the base of his cock is embarrassing to say the least and he can feel the huff of Seokjin’s laughter against his skin. “Eager, are we?”
“Hyung,” Jungkook whines, risking a glance down and immediately looking away with a startled sound.
“You okay?” Seokjin asks with a hint of teasing.
“Too hot, I can’t-” Jungkook manages, a thought that dies quickly when he feels the warm wetness of Seokjin’s mouth taking him in. “Oh god oh god oh god,” he chants.
Seokjin pulls off enough to check in. “Are you sure you’re okay?”
“It’s just- I’ve been thinking about this for a long time. Like, a really long time, and I feel like you’re going to be underwhelmed and disappointed because this is- I’m not sure I’m going to be able to-” Jungkook says in a rush.
Seokjin silences him by dropping down again, taking him deep, and Jungkook has to press his hips against the mattress to keep from fucking into Seokjin’s mouth. Seokjin pins him down and it helps on one level but on another it feeds into some lingering fantasies he has and he whines pathetically.
The soft drag of Seokjin’s lips, the swirling of his tongue, the way his spit runs down to his fist and eases the slide, all of this has Jungkook careening helplessly toward release, and he holds on for a few minutes before he can’t anymore, there’s nothing he can think of or distract himself with to postpone the inevitable.
“Hyung- I’m gonna- oh god,” Jungkook warns him, but Seokjin doesn’t pull away, just hums in acknowledgement, and Jungkook tries so hard to be quiet but he’s moaning and gasping, all his muscles clenching as he comes harder than he ever has in his life. His hearing feels faded out and his pulse thumps in his temples.
Seokjin pulls off of him, the cool air hitting wet skin making a chill run through Jungkook, a shudder different from the aftershocks he’s already trembling through. Jungkook tries to focus his eyes on Seokjin’s face, where his chin is resting on Jungkook’s thigh.
“Holy shit,” Jungkook breathes, tries to anyway, chest heaving. “That was the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me.”
Seokjin snorts. “Okay, I don’t know if my technique is that good… I mean maybe, but the best blow job you’ve ever had? I don’t think-”
“Hyung that’s… that’s the only blow job I’ve ever had,” Jungkook murmurs, watching as Seokjin’s eyes get impossibly wide.
“What?” Seokjin asks, looking for the lie there, but Jungkook just blinks back at him. “How can you have gotten laid but never had a blow job? I don’t-”
“I...” Jungkook starts, but trails off. Oh shit. He thought Seokjin knew, just assumed they all did. Maybe he should pretend, hint at something so that Seokjin doesn’t think he’s such a freak, that he-
“Wait, Jungkook. You’re not- are you?” Seokjin tries.
“Not what, hyung?” Jungkook asks so quietly he’s not sure he can be heard, and maybe that’s better, maybe he’ll just vanish suddenly and won’t have to have this conversation, because he swears he thought this was common knowledge.
“Are you- have you never- been with anyone?” Seokjin wants to know, brow furrowed, and Jungkook feels like he’s in trouble for not saying something sooner, and he’s already horribly ashamed that, despite everything - fame and fortune and whatnot - he hasn’t managed to get himself laid yet. Which, to be fair, is kind of Seokjin’s fault for being so perfect and making Jungkook fall in love with him. “Jungkookie,” Seokjin prompts and he realizes he’s been silently staring at his ceiling.
“Um,” he stalls, resisting the urge to roll onto his side into the fetal position and cry.
“Fuck, you should have said something,” Seokjin says, and Jungkook gives in and turns away, pulling his legs up to his chest and fumbling for the blanket to cover himself. “Whoa, no, hang on,” Seokjin quickly adds, crawling up the bed to spoon himself around Jungkook. “It’s okay.”
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” Jungkook mumbles.
“It’s fine, it’s totally okay. I didn’t mean to-” Seokjin sighs heavily. “I wasn’t trying to scold you, or make you feel bad, I just… would have taken it more slowly, if I’d have known.”
“I know it’s, like, disappointing or whatever-”
“Ya, are you kidding me? When have you ever been disappointing?” Seokjin practically shouts, trying to uncurl Jungkook’s body so he can look at him. Instinctively Jungkook fights it.
“All the time? I’m always doing things wrong, upsetting ARMY…” Jungkook whines, then he finally lets Seokjin get him on his back.
“You’re ruining your post orgasmic glow you know,” Seokjin chides, laying his head on Jungkook’s chest and looking up at him. “I’m not at all, in any way, disappointed in you.”
“But I mean you’re going to be disappointed by my lack of experience or whatever and-”
“Jungkook-ah, everything you try, you’re good at,” Seokjin soothes him, then places a gentle kiss to his sternum. “It takes practice, just like everything. And I am very willing to help you with that. And you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, or anything at all, okay?”
“How unfair would it be for me not to- after you-” Jungkook starts.
“This isn’t about what’s fair, it’s about you being comfortable,” Seokjin interjects.
Jungkook sighs in frustration. “I want to, hyung. If you knew how many times I thought about- that I dreamt about- it’s a lot, okay? Like, a lot a lot,” he confesses, feeling his cheeks heat.
“Yeah?” Seokjin asks, a little flirty, and Jungkook unfurls himself a bit more, legs stretching back down the bed. “A lot, huh?”
“Yeah,” Jungkook breathes out in relief, because this is okay, Seokjin doesn’t think he’s a freak, he’s not like, repulsed by him and his lack of experience.
“Tell me, JK, what you’ve thought about?” Seokjin presses playfully, fingers walking up the space between Jungkook’s pecs.
“Oh wow, how much time do you have?” Jungkook jokes, making Seokjin smile, and he’s so handsome Jungkook kind of wants to cry, the fact that this is finally happening is still a little overwhelming. Seokjin shrugs noncommittally and Jungkook tries to pick a point to begin, tries to filter what he’s ready to tell him and what might be better to save until they’re more settled in this.
“You don’t have to,” Seokjin says, and Jungkook realizes he’s gone silent again, then rubs his palm over his face to clear his head.
“Like, I want to touch you-”
“And I wanna do what you just did to me, to you-”
“And I- I really want you to fuck me,” he rushes out.
Seokjin’s eyebrows jump into his hair. “Oh?” Shyness overtakes Jungkook and he twists his head to the side to avoid Seokjin’s stare, but Seokjin climbs on top of him and grabs his face, squishing his cheeks. “You’re not allowed to say something like that to me then hide, Jungkook.”
“Why are you sorry?” Seokjin asks in exasperation.
“I want too much…” Jungkook admits, but Seokjin leans in and kisses his lips where they’re smashed together by Seokjin’s hands.
“You know I always give you everything you want,” Seokjin teases, finally letting go of Jungkook’s cheeks.
“Oh,” Jungkook says, pleasantly surprised.
“Are you- what’s going on?” Seokjin asks, rocking back onto Jungkook’s pelvis where he’s getting hard again.
“Sorry?” Jungkook offers weakly.
“What in the world would you be sorry for?” Seokjin laughs. “I mean, it’s very flattering to me, for one thing. And having a boyfriend who can go another round, well-”
“Boyfriend?” Jungkook squeaks, and Seokjin’s eyes glaze over with terror.
“Oh fuck,” Seokjin utters as he starts to slide sideways off Jungkook’s lap but Jungkook grabs him by the hips, holds him fast.
“You wanna be my boyfriend, hyungie?” Jungkook teases lightly, grabbing the front of Seokjin’s shirt and pulling him down so he can kiss him. While he’s got his hand tangled there he reaches the other one up to pull at the material, trying to urge Seokjin to take it off. Seokjin seems to welcome the distraction and sits back to yank his shirt off, diving back down to Jungkook’s mout, but Jungkook plants a hand in the middle of his broad chest. “Do you?”
“Do I what?” Seokjin asks, grinding his ass against Jungkook’s erection.
“Ah- stop trying to change the subject. Do you - fuck, hyung, that’s so good, oh my god - do you want to be my boyfriend?” Jungkook practically demands between gasps.
“JK,” Seokjin starts, taking Jungkook’s hand from his chest so he can lean down, press his bare skin to Jungkook’s, “I wanna be more than your boyfriend.”
“What? What does that mean?” Jungkook says in surprise, his brain starting to do laps.
“Just that… boyfriend seems so casual somehow, and the way I feel about you… it’s a lot more than that,” Seokjin explains quietly.
Jungkook’s glad Seokjin’s face is buried in his neck because tears start to prickle in the corners of his eyes and he blinks rapidly to try to keep them at bay.
“Is that- I didn’t mean to scare you,” Seokjin mumbles against Jungkook’s skin.
“Not scared, hyung,” Jungkook confirms, trying to keep the tremble of emotions from his voice.
“Good, that’s… good,” Seokjin huffs out, clearly relieved, and Jungkook wraps his arms so tightly around him Seokjin groans. “Less time at the gym, seriously, you're going to crush me.”
“Jin-hyung, please- kiss me,” Jungkook begs, hoping it will calm the impending explosion in his heart somehow, contain it, do some damage control. Seokjin does it immediately, no teasing, no pretend hesitance, and it makes Jungkook burn all over. The kiss is frantic now, like Seokjin unburdening himself of those feelings has made him desperate and he can’t get enough of Jungkook’s mouth.
Jungkook tries his best not to get lost in his want for Seokjin but he inevitably finds himself moaning over the drag of Seokjin’s clothes against his naked skin. Seokjin leverages himself up enough to ease himself between Jungkook's thighs again, pulling his sweatpants down his thighs until they’re skin on skin where Jungkook wants it the most right now.
“Holy fuck,” Jungkook murmurs, squeezing his eyes shut tight. “This feels amazing, oh my god.”
Seokjin laughs lightly in his ear. “So easily impressed.”
“Hyung,” Jungkook whines. “Don’t tease me.”
“Okay,” Seokjin agrees easily. “Do you have lube? Or lotion?”
“Um, um,” Jungkook tries to get his brain back online. “Yeah, on the nightstand.” He flails his arm back and searches blindly, knocking things haphazardly to the floor, before he comes back with some lotion which he hands to Seokjin. Seokjin kisses him again until he’s gasping, then he suddenly feels the cold slickness of Seokjin’s palm coated in lotion surrounding his dick and he makes an embarrassing sound and bucks into it.
Seokjin’s hand slides off of him and he’s about to beg, cry, scream to get him to touch him again but before he can, Seokijn’s fingers are wrapping around him but something feels different. He dares to look between them and sees Seokjin’s hand holding both their cocks, slowly fisting them, and he has to tip his head back against his pillow or he might come in an instantaneous, humiliating display.
“You don’t want to watch?” Seokjin asks quietly, a hint of a challenge there.
“I don’t think I can,” Jungkook says pathetically. “Unless you want this to be over in like two seconds.”
Seokjin laughs fondly at the same time he rolls his thumb over the head of Jungkook’s dick and Jungkook’s whole body lurches making him accidentally bonk heads with Seokjin.
“Violent even like this, JK?” Seokjin jokes and Jungkook pouts but can’t maintain it for shit because Seokjin must be an expert at this, making Jungkook twitch with every flick of his wrist, making him want to thrust into the tight space of Seokjin’s fist. “I wish you could see, it’s so hot.”
“Okay, okay, I can do this,” Jungkook says, mostly to himself, and Seokjin’s chuckling at him. He glances down again and fuck, yes, it’s so hot, the hottest thing he’s ever seen in his life. This is the closest he’s come to touching another person like this and he has to fight the urge to plunge headlong into his orgasm. “Fuuuuck,” he groans.
“Doing alright there?” Seokjin teases and Jungkook makes an exasperated, desperate noise that seems to delight Seokjin.
“I’m trying,” Jungkook whines.
“You can come baby, it’s okay,” Seokjin murmurs and something rushes through Jungkook, relief and shame and somewhere in there such a deep affection he feels like he’s suffocating.
“Hyung oh my god,” Jungkook practically sobs and Seokjin speeds up just enough that Jungkook knows he’s done for.
“Watch,” Seokjin instructs and Jungkook focuses his gaze, holds his breath while Seokjin pumps his hand over them. It takes only seconds and it feels like fireworks are going off under Jungkook’s skin as come floods his chest. Seokjin strokes him through it until he’s quaking, then he’s letting go of Jungkook’s dick to work over himself in earnest, one hand planted beside Jungkook’s head for balance and the other fast and needy on his cock.
Seokjin is panting above him, clearly teetering on the edge, and all it takes is Jungkook saying, “I wanna see you,” before he’s adding to the mess on Jungkook’s stomach. Jungkook moans louder than Seokjin does when he comes and he presses up to catch Seokjin’s lips, to swallow down his quiet whimpers. He realizes his fingernails are digging into Seokjin’s shoulders and he releases his death grip, flopping back onto the mattress.
Seokjin falls back between Jungkook’s thighs and that’s not going to work at all. “Hyung I need you here!” Jungkook demands, and he feels the bed dip as Seokjin makes his way up, collapsing into the space Jungkook’s made for him. “Oh my god,” Jungkook reiterates for maybe the thousandth time, snuggling his face against Seokjin’s, rubbing their noses together.
"You okay?" Seokjin asks.
"So good," Jungkook breathes out.
"Let me get something to clean you up," Seokjin murmurs, finding his shirt hanging off the edge of the bed, and he gently wipes Jungkook clean.
"Will you stay tonight?" Jungkook manages around a yawn. Seokjin doesn't answer but pulls the sheet up over them, tucking into Jungkook's side, and it doesn’t take long for Jungkook to fall into a peaceful sleep.
“You’re sure about this?” Seokjin asks, hand braced on Jungkook’s inner thigh. Jungkook thinks if Seokjin doesn’t do something soon he might actually implode.
“Yes, incredibly, so sure,” Jungkook says quickly, spreading his thighs wider to make his point.
Seokjin ducks his head to hide his smile but Jungkook catches a glimpse of it, and it’s shy but steady, like Seokjin’s always steady for Jungkook, so he relaxes just a bit, some of the nervousness burning off but the anticipation still cresting intensely.
Seokjin opens the lube and Jungkook watches with wide eyes as he spreads it over his fingers. “You said you’d done this before?”
Jungkook hesitates for a second, not entirely sure why, maybe something about the amount of times he’s done this is somehow shaming, but Seokjin waits patiently for his answer. “Yeah. I have… stuff…”
“Stuff?” Seokjin presses, an eyebrow raised.
Jungkook blushes, breaking eye contact. “Like… like toys.”
“Fuck, why is that so hot?” Seokjin wonders and Jungkook definitely sees Seokjin’s cock twitch, making a shudder ripple through him. “Oh god, okay. Okay.” If possible Seokjin almost seems more nervous than Jungkook but he gets it, knows Seokjin wants to make this good for him, something he’s been thinking about for literal years.
Seokjin presses one finger over his rim, rubbing gently before he sinks inside and Jungkook feels like all the air has been punched out of his lungs. It feels fucking amazing, and the way he’s been absolutely longing for this is just making it even better.
“Okay?” Seokjin checks in and Jungkook tries to say something coherent but instead just makes some sort of high pitched noise and tries to rock down further, to take more. “Fuck, okay. So yeah, I’ll… keep going then?” Jungkook nods rapidly, looks down to where Seokjin’s kneeling between his legs, where he can see his hand disappear. Jungkook’s dick is already leaking and he prays to a god he doesn’t believe in that he can keep it together until he’s actually getting fucked.
Seokjin works in and out of him, slow and steady, and it’s incredible, the sensation sparking all throughout Jungkook’s body, and as much as he wants to ask for more already he knows taking it slow is as much for Seokjin as it is for him.
Because Seokjin’s never done this before, either.
Jungkook had tried not to laugh when Seokjin admitted he’d been doing research because it was so cute and made Jungkook feel even more fond of his hyung, something he didn’t think was possible.
”Ya, I just want to do it right, okay?”
“Tell me more about this research,” Jungkook teased, leaning over the back of Seokjin's desk chair, arms wrapped around him.
Seokjin avoided his eyes but Jungkook could see his ears turning pink. “Just reading, and, you know… watching.”
“There’s nothing wrong with being prepared,” Seokjin grumbled. Jungkook moved from behind his chair to straddle Seokjin’s lap, leaning down to kiss him. Soft at first, but he couldn’t stop himself from letting it get heated. Seokjin gripped his hips tightly to keep him from grinding down against him. “So when are we doing this?” Seokjin asked, trying and failing to keep the urgency from his voice.
Jungkook giggled. “Only when you’ve collected the proper number of sources for your research. After you finish your term paper. And only if you get a passing grade.”
“Ha ha, very funny,” Seokjin monotoned. “I’m more interested in the practical portion.”
“Wait, are we role playing right now?” Jungkook asked excitedly.
“You tell me, Professor Jeon,” Seokjin practically purred, moving his hands to grab Jungkook’s ass firmly.
“Oh!” Jungkook said in surprise. “Oh. Well, if you’re worried about passing marks, I might be able to offer you some extra credit?” Jungkook tried, biting back the shyness he was feeling. He squeaked in surprise as Seokjin lifted him enough to deposit him on the bed nearby, immediately tucking in against him and burying his face in his neck.
“Do you want me to keep going? Do you want more?” Seokjin asks without stopping his movements.
“More, please,” Jungkook begs, voice sounding thin already, and he trembles when he feels the press of another finger against him before Seokjin pushes it in against the other. “Oh, fuck yeah, okay,” Jungkook manages.
“Good?” Seokjin wants to know and he sounds as wrecked as Jungkook already feels.
“Hyung oh my god,” Jungkook moans. “This is the greatest thing-”
“You keep saying that, like, every time we do something,” Seokjin teases, and he curls his fingers just right.
“Ah! Holy fuck, okay, yeah. Yes. You’re right. But it just keeps getting better and-”
“Eventually you’ll get bored of me?” Seokjin supplies and he’s joking, of course he is, but there’s a hint of doubt there that absolutely cracks Jungkook’s heart.
Jungkook reaches down and clasps his hand around Seokjin’s wrist. “What? Hyung I could never-”
“I was joking,” Seokjin plays it off, and despite the fact that he can’t move his arm he curls his fingers again, practically making Jungkook’s eyes cross.
“That’s cheating,” Jungkook manages through gritted teeth. “Can you just- can I just say something?”
Seokjin sighs like he’s the most put upon person on the planet but he’s fighting a smile at the same time. He gives Jungkook a look to have him continue.
“I’m never going to get bored of you because you’re my favorite human on the planet and I’m in love with you,” Jungkook rushes out before he loses his nerve.
Seokjin’s face shifts into something that Jungkook can’t really read and now he’s freaking out because he just told his hyung that he loves him and maybe he should have saved that, or never said it at all, but it’s out there now, taking up every last bit of free space in the room.
“This is when you decided to tell me? While I’ve got my fingers up your ass?” Seokjin asks, but his voice is so soft, so fond that Jungkook’s heart feels like it might burst.
Seokjin leans in to kiss him greedily and with Jungkook’s defenses lowered he starts moving his arm again, making Jungkook cry out against his mouth.
“For the record, I love you too,” Seokjin murmurs, and Jungkook’s hand is tangled in his hair as he kisses him and kisses him, hips kicking as Seokjin scissors him open.
“Hyung, please, I want more-” Jungkook begs, and Seokjin moans, gives him exactly what he asks for and Jungkook feels the intensity of the stretch, three fingers spreading him wider. It hurts a little at first but it’s nothing he’s not used to, the toys he’s used have prepared him for this.
“Fuck, you take it so well,” Seokjin praises him and Jungkook shudders, grabs on to Seokjin’s broad shoulders so he can leverage himself, fuck himself down onto Seokjin’s hand. “Holy fuck this is the hottest thing ever.”
Jungkook grins happily. “That sounds like my line.” Seokjin laughs and it blooms in Jungkook’s chest, warm and familiar. His patience is worn too thin, desperation building exponentially. “Please, I need- I'm ready.”
“You sure?” Seokjin asks cautiously.
“Hyung if you don’t fuck me right now I might actually die,” Jungkook grits out.
“I think that might be an exaggeration-”
“Hyung!” Jungkook almost shouts and Seokjin is laughing, but Jungkook thinks maybe he’s also stalling. “If you… if you still want to.”
“I want to,” Seokjin tells him seriously. “I want to make you feel good.”
“Feels good now,” Jungkook says.
“But you said you wanted more?” Seokjin teases him.
“I’m greedy, sue me,” Jungkook admits.
Seokjin slowly pulls his fingers out and Jungkook’s body shakes with the loss but he sees Seokjin moving quickly. “Condom? Or-”
“You’re my first, remember?” Jungkook murmurs. Seokjin nods, and there’s no way he forgot, but it almost seems like he’s still having a hard time getting his head around it. “I mean, I guess we never talked about you. Like, who you’ve been with. When,” Jungkook stumbles, realizing that jealousy threatens to crash down on him. What if Seokjin’s been with someone recently?
“It’s been a while,” is all Seokjin says and Jungkook feels his chest get tight, because he still doesn’t know exactly what that means.
“Are you clean?” Jungkook asks instead, trying to glaze over the envy rising up in him.
“Then we’re good without,” Jungkook forces out, tries to school his features.
“Jungkook, it was a while ago, and I didn’t know- I didn’t know how you felt-”
“It’s fine,” Jungkook manages.
“You’re upset,” Seokjin points out. Jungkook shrugs, wants to just get past this, but Seokjin’s not going to let it go. “JK, if I’d known-”
Seokjin’s brow furrows and he practically flops down on top of Jungkook. “Why do you say that? If it matters to you it matters to me.”
“You’re killing the mood, hyung,” Jungkook tries to joke, attempting to shove Seokjin’s weight off of him.
“I love you. I want to be with you, like this and like… in all the ways,” Seokjin fumbles, and Jungkook laughs, feeling a little lighter. “Can I make love to you now?”
“Gross,” Jungkook says, pulling a face. “You can fuck me now.”
“You’re so romantic. Sweeping me right off my feet,” Seokjin hits back, but he sits up and kneels between Jungkook’s legs. All of the serious talking had kind of dulled Jungkook’s arousal but seeing Seokjin gently petting his thigh, the softness and care that’s underlined with need and want makes him shiver, unleashes a new wave of desire.
Seokjin grabs the lube and pops the cap, wetting his palm and stroking it over himself a few times, then wiping more against Jungkook’s rim. Jungkook gasps, chases the contact and Seokjin quickly positions himself, his cock dragging over Jungkook’s hole.
“Please hyung,” Jungkook whines and Seokjin takes a deep breath and holds it as he presses inside.
It should be familiar, he’s been using toys for a while now, but this is nothing like that. This is exhilarating in a whole new way, because not only is he finally with someone else, he’s with his hyung who he’s been stupidly in love with since he was a teenager. This never seemed within the realm of possibilities and now he’s pinned under Seokjin’s weight as he slides all the way in, bottoming out.
“Okay?” Seokjin asks, but even his voice is strained.
“It’s so good, you feel amazing,” Jungkook tells him, wrapping his arms around him. “You?”
“You’re so tight, fuck, I’ve never- this is a lot, I’m a little worried about disappointing you,” Seokjin admits with a nervous laugh.
“You won’t,” Jungkook assures him. “This is-”
“The greatest thing that’s happened to you?” Seokjin finishes and Jungkook laughs.
“Yeah. You are,” he confirms sentimentally and he catches Seokjin’s shy smile before he can duck his head to hide it. “Now please move.”
“You demanding brat,” Seokjin mumbles and he snaps his hips, and Jungkook doesn’t know if he’s going to make it, it’s too good already. “Okay I’m going to need you to look far less sexy if you want this to last longer than 30 seconds,” Seokjin jokes.
“I wouldn’t sweat the timing,” Jungkook says, meeting his eyes.
“Have I got you all hot and bothered?” Seokjin asks smugly until Jungkook clenches down on him, destroying his composure. “That’s cheating.”
“Please stop talking and fuck me. Seriously,” Jungkook whines and Seokjin smirks down at him but starts to slowly thrust, the wet hot drag of it making Jungkook’s nerves light up.
Seokjin leans over him so he can kiss him, hungry and messy and Jungkook whimpers against his lips, his dick trapped between their bodies now and Seokjin’s fallen into a steady rhythm. Seokjin sucks hard on Jungkook’s neck and Jungkook distantly thinks that’s probably a bad idea in case it leaves a mark but the him in the here and now thinks that’s future Jungkook’s problem.
Moving a little faster, Seokjin grinds hard into Jungkook, then he makes a frustrated noise.
Seokjin sighs. “I know I should be able to get the angle right, if I just- maybe if I sit back and-”
“Hey,” Jungkook says, trying to get his attention. Seokjin’s eyebrows are drawn together in concentration and sweat glistens on his skin, and Jungkook’s hit with another wave of just how much he loves him. “Hyung, it’s okay.”
Seokjin frowns. “I want this to be good for you.”
“It is good for me. You’re thinking too hard, just- come here,” Jungkook demands, yanking Seokjin down on top of him again so they can kiss. “Just do what you were doing, it feels so fucking good.”
“Yeah?” Seokjin asks, and Jungkook shakes him by the shoulders.
“Yes. Stop thinking with your brain and start thinking with your dick,” Jungkook jokes and Seokjin laughs, buries his smile in Jungkook’s neck. He moves his hips again, and Jungkook can tell when he finally lets go, when he stops trying to make it perfect and simply follows the feeling.
Jungkook arches his back, spreads his thighs, and somehow wants Seokjin impossibly deeper when he’s already full to his limit. Seokjin swallows his little moans and whimpers, shifts against him over and over and Jungkook knows it won’t take much, just a few strokes of his fist and he’d come, but he doesn’t want to, not yet.
He only gets one first, and he doesn’t really give a shit about his virginity, it’s not that. He only gets one first with Seokjin and he doesn’t want it to end, but he’s reaching a fever pitch, and he knows he’s not the only one.
“Jungkookie, I’m sorry-”
“Hyung you don’t need to-”
“I’m so close, it feels too good,” Seokjin says, apology thick in his voice.
“Touch me,” Jungkook begs, and Seokjin pulls back, their eyes meeting and Jungkook wonders for a second if he even needs to be touched, thinks maybe he might just tip right over the edge. But Seokjin’s hand is on him, smearing precum down from his tip, and he feels like he’s going to combust.
“Come on baby,” Seokjin urges and Jungkook moans, every inch of him tensing as his release washes over him, come striping his chest.
Jungkook runs his hands down Seokjin’s back to his ass, pulling him even closer. “Wanna feel you hyung,” he murmurs, panting, and Seokjin lets out a broken whine, and Jungkook can feel the hot wetness of him following right behind him.
“Oh god,” Seokjin huffs against Jungkook’s skin, and as Jungkook comes down he’s starting to feel a little overwhelmed, the somewhat familiar fear that he’s in over his head, that maybe he loves Seokjin so much it’s dangerous. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” Jungkook manages and Seokjin pulls back so they can look at each other, the complete and utter fondness in his expression melting away Jungkook’s apprehension.
“Sorry it was-”
“No!” Jungkook quickly interrupts him. “No sorries, no way.”
Seokjin smiles, easing gently out of Jungkook so he can climb up the bed next to him, curl against his side. “Not going to lie, that was a lot like my first time all over again. I didn’t know it would feel that good.”
“Hyung you make it sound like I was going to be a bad lay or something,” Jungkook teases and Seokjin groans against his shoulder.
“Not at all what I meant and I think you know that, you twerp,” Seokjin hits back.
“Just wait until next time,” Jungkook teases.
“Oh?” Seokjin says around a yawn.
“Yeah, when I ride you.”
Seokjin sputters out a cough. “Ya, you can’t just say stuff like that to me!”
Jungkook laughs deviously, turning his head to press his lips to Seokjin’s forehead. “Stay the night.”
“I want to,” Seokjin starts, and Jungkook can already hear the but. “The others, we might- we should probably-”
“Are we a secret, hyung?” Jungkook asks, voice small, because he’ll understand if the answer is yes but that’s not what he wants to hear.
Seokjin sighs heavily. “I want to say no…”
“You don’t think they’ll be okay with it?” Jungkook seeks to confirm, almost able to hear his frown.
“I don’t know, honestly.”
“It’s not like we can keep doing this and not tell them, they’re going to find out,” Jungkook reasons, and Seokjin goes silent. “Or are you saying we- we shouldn’t-”
“I don’t know what I’m saying,” Seokjin admits, and Jungkook can’t help but pull away, sit up on the edge of the bed while he tries to harness his feelings because if he’d known that this wasn’t going to- that they weren’t going to- he never would have gone this far in the first place. “Jungkookie-”
“You’re right, you shouldn’t stay here,” Jungkook says, his back still to Seokjin.
“I’m going to shower,” Jungkook tells him, quickly pulling on his sweats. He avoids Seokjin’s eyes, his reaching hand as he slips out of his room and down the hall to the bathroom.
Closed into the small space he slides down the wall and pulls his knees up, tipping his head forward onto his arms where they cross over his knees. He’s not going to cry - he’s not - but the misery churns in his gut.
He’s on autopilot as he showers, his head full of static, and he expects Seokjin to be gone when he gets back to his room but he’s not. He’s sitting cross legged on Jungkook’s bed in his underwear.
“Did you really think I was going to leave it like this?” Seokjin asks and he sounds as upset as Jungkook feels honestly. “Did you forget that I love you?” He also sounds kind of angry and Jungkook’s not sure what to do with that. “Come here.”
Jungkook grabs clean pajama bottoms and pulls them on, sits down on the bed next to Seokjin. Seokjin sighs exasperatedly and turns toward Jungkook, pulling at Jungkook’s shoulder until they’re facing each other.
“I don’t know what the next step is, the right way to do this, and I feel like I should because I’m the hyung, you know?” Seokjin says. “I just know that when you walked out of here it scared the hell out of me. I wanted this to be good, this whole experience, and I feel like I ruined it.”
Jungkook lets out a slow breath and tips forward until his head is resting against Seokjin’s chest. “You didn’t.”
“We’re going to tell them. And I’m… I’m going to stay the night. If the offer is still there,” Seokjin tells him. Jungkook lifts his head and launches forward to crush Seokjin back against the mattress, pressing kisses all over his face and neck. “That’s a yes, then?”
“I always want you to stay,” Jungkook admits feeling suddenly shy.
“I’m going to shower but I promise I’ll come back,” Seokjin says, petting his hand down Jungkook’s back. Jungkook rolls off of him so he can get up and he lays there, staring at the ceiling, not moving until Seokjin’s back from the bathroom, hair still damp, in his RJ pajamas.
Jungkook adjusts on the bed, making room so that Seokjin can settle in beside him and he immediately wraps himself around his hyung. Seokjin pulls him close and they stay curled up like that until morning.
Jungkook wakes up first and is awash in relief that Seokjin stayed through the night. He presses his lips against Seokjin’s neck which earns him a sleepy moan and he’s greeted with a warm smile.
“You stayed,” Jungkook murmurs.
“Said I would. And I wanted to,” Seokjin tells him, stretching against Jungkook’s body.
“Can I blow you?”
“I don’t know, can you?” Seokjin goads, and Jungkook pinches him savagely in the ribs. “I mean, you can try.”
Jungkook pouts and Seokjin runs his thumb over Jungkook’s exposed lower lip where he’s pushed it out. “You have no faith in me.”
“Practice makes perfect,” Seokjin sing-songs and Jungkook reaches down, palms Seokjin’s cock where he’s already hard. “I woke up like that.”
“And it has nothing to do with me, huh?” Jungkook presses and Seokjin shrugs noncommittally, trying to suppress a grin. “Maybe I should just… leave you to it, then.”
“Wait wait wait,” Seokjin rushes out as Jungkook pretends to pull away, and Seokjin catches him by the wrist.
“What is it, Jin-hyung? Did you need something?” Jungkook feigns ignorance and Seokjin pulls him down into a kiss.
“Babe, please,” Seokjin hums against Jungkook’s lips and Jungkook grins, shifts on the mattress so he can pull the blankets back, so he can run his fingers over the tented fabric of Seokjin’s pajama bottoms. He teases for a few minutes, just glancing touches as Seokjin squirms and whimpers.
Jungkook finally curls his fingers under the elastic of Seokjin’s pants and underwear and eases them down, tossing them onto the floor. He wets his lips and Seokjin must be watching him because he outright moans, and Jungkook flits his eyes up to him and smiles before he tentatively wraps his hand around the base and licks a wide stripe up the underside of Seokjin’s cock.
Seokjin’s whole body lurches at the touch and he reaches down to gently cup the side of Jungkook’s head, fingers tangling in his hair. Jungkook drops his jaw open and takes the head of Seokjin’s dick into his mouth, closing down around it. He’s mindful of his teeth, tries to keep the plush of his lips against the smooth heat of Seokjin’s skin.
“Oh JK,” Seokjin praises like he so often has before, and it quickens Jungkook’s pulse. He drops a little lower, takes more but not too much, he doesn’t want to gag and ruin the moment. He tries to keep his tongue working, pressing the tip to the slit and Seokjin shudders when he does, hand tightening just slightly in his hair. He takes a deep breath and goes as far as he can, until Seokjin’s cock bumps the back of his throat, and he swallows, making Seokjin moan loudly.
Jungkook pulls off long enough to say, “You should be quiet, hyung,” but when he takes him back into the heat of his mouth Seokjin swears just as exuberantly.
“Jungkookie, fuck,” he manages, and Jungkook hums around his length, dragging a gasp out of him. Jungkook slides off to press kisses to Seokjin’s cock instead, licking again before encasing him in the heat of his mouth. He settles into a rhythm, slowly pumping his fist while he works the head with his lips and tongue, and Seokjin’s trembling with every swipe, every suck.
Jungkook’s lips start to tingle but he doesn’t stop, he won’t, and Seokjin’s obviously unraveling under him. “JK, I’m- I’m so close,” Seokjin whines and Jungkook drops lower again, taking everything he can, and Seokjin tries to pull him off but instead he swallows again and then Seokjin is coming, hot and bitter over Jungkook’s tongue. It swells the arousal Jungkook’s already drowning in. He licks and licks until Seokjin’s trembling and trying to push him away.
“Okay, god, I’m good I’m good,” Seokjin huffs out a laugh, body going limp on the bed when Jungkook pulls off of him.
“Was it okay hyung?” Jungkook asks, and Seokjin prods him in his swollen lips.
“Mmmm,” Seokjin manages, taking deep breaths. Jungkook is hard, leaking into his pajama pants, but that’s fine, that’s nothing he’s not used to, so he cuddles up to Seokjin and keeps his hips back not wanting Seokjin to think he needs to reciprocate or anything, but Seokjin drags him in closer until they’re pressed together. “What do you want?”
“Nothing hyung, I’m fine,” he says, and he is, he will be.
“You don’t want to get off?” Seokjin asks skeptically.
“I don’t need to,” Jungkook insists.
“But what if i need you to?” Seokjin presses, his thigh slotting between Jungkook’s and pressing against his erection. Jungkook can’t contain the hiss of pleasure that breaks free. “Ah, you don’t need to though? You’re good?”
“Don’t tease,” Jungkook whines, trying and failing not to rut against Seokjin’s thigh.
“So desperate,” Seokjin chides before he captures Jungkook’s lips in a searing kiss, and Jungkook gives up all pretense and full-on humps Seokjin’s leg. “Can you come like this?”
“Y- yeah? Probably,” Jungkook says.
“I want you to,” Seokjin purrs and Jungkook feels dizzy.
“I don’t know, it’s… hot. Desperate. I like it when you’re so needy for me,” Seokjin admits a little shyly but the confession has Jungkook reeling.
“You want me to just-?” Jungkook tries to ask but he feels embarrassed, then he wonders if that’s part of it.
“Yeah, I do,” Seokjin murmurs and he kisses Jungkook hungrily again. Jungkook grips Seokjin’s hips and humps against his thigh, the friction rough and dry but still so good, especially with how much it seems to be turning Seokjin on. Seokjin slips his hand down the back of Jungkook’s pants, between his cheeks, and presses a finger against his rim, rubbing gently, and Jungkook comes hot and sticky into his pajamas.
Jungkook feels a wave of shame burn through him, even though it’s what Seokjin wanted he feels inexperienced and weird, but Seokjin is kissing him like his life depends on it.
“Fuck you’re so hot, that was amazing,” Seokjin mumbles against his lips and Jungkook flushes deeper.
“Yeah?” he asks, the unsureness peeking through despite his best efforts to keep it contained. Seokjin reaches between them, hand pushing under the waistband into the mess of Jungkook’s pants and he moans. “Fuck, hyung-”
“Sorry, sorry,” Seokjin says but Jungkook stops him from abruptly pulling away.
“This really does it for you huh?” Jungkook wants to know.
“Yeah I don’t know, I guess I just like it when you want it so much,” Seokjin admits and it’s his turn to blush.
“Anything for you hyung,” Jungkook murmurs, tucking his shy smile into Seokjin’s neck. “Ugh I’m a mess. Again.”
“Welcome to sex,” Seokjin announces glibly, rolling onto his back and then siting up. “I should probably get ready, I have a meeting today I think.”
“You’re just going to leave me like this?” Jungkook asks, aghast, and Seokjin laughs loud and squeaky.
“Yes,” he confirms, then twists to kiss Jungkook one last time before he stands, and Jungkook lets him go, lays back down for another few minutes to bask in the awesomeness. “JK, really. Get up, get in the shower. We have to go.”
“We have to go.”
“Hyung,” Jungkook complains, rolling back into the warmth of the space Seokjin has just vacated.
“Do you really want to be late for Jimin and Taehyung’s rehearsal dinner? I let you nap-”
“You napped too-”
“Because you’re exhausting-”
“You just get tired easy now that you're so old,” Jungkook jabs.
“It’s not my fault you immediately fall asleep after you come,” Seokjin hits back, but even as he says it he’s crawling back into bed to kiss Jungkook.
“Stop fucking me so hard and maybe I won’t.”
Seokjin grins smugly. “You like it hard.”
“Yeah, I do,” Jungkook purrs, reaching out to try to pull Seokjin farther back into bed and against him.
“Hey! No! We gotta get going!” Seokjin protests, but his lips are still brushing against Jungkook’s.
“Real quick,” Jungkook tries, but Seokjin pulls back finally, out of bed. “Hyung,” Jungkook whines.
“You’re insatiable, you know that?” Seokjin teases, pulling some clothes out of his suitcase.
“You love me,” Jungkook pouts, sitting up and scooting to the edge of the bed.
“More than anything,” Seokjin confirms, turning to smile fondly at Jungkook.
They stay out late, too late probably considering they have a wedding the next day, but it’s been too long since they’ve all been together like this. Taehyung keeps pouring more wine into Jungkook’s glass, and once they finally call it a night Seokjin has to steady him as they make their way back to the hotel.
His head is vaguely stuffy and achy when he wakes up the next morning. He peels one eye open to find Seokjin still asleep, mouth hanging open as he lightly snores, and Jungkook presses his index finger down onto Seokjin’s tongue.
Seokjin wakes with a gasp and a cough, blinking wildly while Jungkook pretends nothing has happened, pressing his eyes closed and acting like he’s sleeping.
“Nice try, but I know you’re awake,” Seokjin says, voice rough with sleep. “Otherwise you’d be snoring loud enough to wake the dead.” Jungkook opens one eye again to peek at him, grinning deviously. “What did I tell you about putting things in my mouth while I’m sleeping?”
“That was one time, and it was a harmless french fry,” Jungkook defends.
“I could have choked!” Seokjin retorts.
“I would have given you mouth to mouth,” Jungkook says with a shrug. “Hyung I feel kind of rough.”
“Yeah, Taehyung was heavy handed with the wine, wasn’t he?” Seokjin agrees. He slides out of bed then looks down in confusion at his RJ pajama top paired with Cooky bottoms. He yanks the covers off Jungkook who squeals in dismay to find hin in the complimentary combination. “Huh.”
“How long until we have to be there?” Jungkook asks around a yawn and Seokjin picks up his phone to check.
“We have plenty of time. Hours still. I’m going to make us some coffee,” Seokjin assures him, crossing the suite to the kitchenette to get the pot started.
“You’re the best, hyung. I love you the most,” Jungkook moans into his pillow. “What would I do without you?”
“It boggles the mind to imagine,” Seokjin replies and Jungkook giggles, his heart bursting the seams of his chest.
“It’s about time, right? That Tae and Jiminie got married?” Jungkook begins, and he doesn’t know why, why now, but something in him knows his next few moves are imperative.
“I’m sure they would have years ago if they could have,” Seokjin answers.
Jungkook can barely hear the tune Seokjin’s singing lightly from across the room, but paired with the warm rich smell of brewing coffee he feels vaguely like he’s drowning, like if he doesn’t act now he might not survive. “Hyung.”
“Mmmm?” Seokjin hums.
Jungkook hears the distinct sound of a dish breaking and nothing else. He waits, holding his breath, unease climbing up inside him like a choking vine.
“What did you- I think maybe I misheard,” Seokjin finally says.
“You know you didn’t,” Jungkook manages around the nerves that are swallowing him up. He makes no move to get out of bed, feels almost paralyzed to do anything, and he can’t look up at Seokjin’s face when he comes back into the room.
“Ya, I know we’re here for a wedding and that it’s romantic, but you need to think this through-”
“Jin-hyung, I have though,” Jungkook says, finally sitting up and meeting his eyes. He slides off the bed and goes to his bag, rummaging through until he finds a small jewelry box.
“No,” Seokjin breaths out and Jungkook practically collapses, almost dropping the box on the floor. “That’s not- I didn’t mean it like that...” Seokjin backtracks. “When did you decide you were going to do this?”
“Here, or in general?” Jungkook asks, anxiety spiking into dangerous levels.
“Either? Or, both, maybe?” Seokjin tries, seemingly overwhelmed himself, pinching the bridge of his nose.
This was not how Jungkook imagined this would go, and he’d give just about anything to take it all back because clearly Seokjin doesn’t want this, doesn’t want to marry him, and how had he been so stupid to think that he would?
“Jungkook,” Seokjin presses.
“How long have you been carrying that box around?” Seokjin asks directly, and Jungkook looks down at it in his hand, clutches it a little tighter.
“A few years?” Jungkook manages, physically deflating.
“What? A few years?” Seokjin says in disbelief. “Jungkook look at me.”
Jungkook takes a steadying breath and gazes up through his lashes and he’s met with the softest, most endearing look on his hyung’s face.
“Why did you wait?”
Jungkook blinks, trying to work through the fog of emotions clouding his brain, wanting to parse what exactly Seokjin means, but he’s holding his left hand out, ring finger slightly raised, and Jungkook stumbles forward having to brace himself against Seokjin’s shoulders.
“Really? You want to?” Jungkook asks quietly and Seokjin cups his face and kisses him gently.
“Hell yes I want to,” he murmurs against Jungkook’s lips.
Jungkook’s hands are shaking as he opens the box, and he clears his throat and gets down on one knee.
“Wow, so traditional, JK, I had no idea-”
Jungkook cuts him off, because he’s rehearsed this, has this part memorized, so he pushes ahead. “You’ve been, like, all of my firsts, hyung. My first best friend, my first love, my first… everything. Would you do me the honor of being my first husband?”
“Ya, first? What does that mean? You planning on having more than one?” Seokjin fakes outrage. Jungkook smirks, pulls the ring from where it’s wedged in the crushed velvet, and Seokjin’s feigned annoyance is betrayed by how quickly he gives Jungkook his hand.
Jungkook slides the simple band over Seokjin’s knuckle and tries not to get overwhelmed but it’s hard. In an effort to keep any threatening tears at bay he stands quickly, scooping Seokjin up in his arms.
Seokjin squeaks in surprise as Jungkook deposits him on the bed, following right after to press down on him, crush their lips together.
“Congratulations! I know I say it all the time, but finally! I mean you took long en-”
“Hyung, what’s that on your finger?” Taehyung interrupts, snatching Seokjin’s hand and bringing it up to his face, then shoving it in Jimin’s face, then shaking it in Jungkook’s.
Jungkook grins, pulling Seokjin against his side and squeezing him.
“Why didn’t you say anything?” Jimin pouts, shoving at Jungkook’s shoulder.
“It’s your day, we didn’t want to-” Jungkook starts.
“Sure you didn’t. Couldn’t have waited one more day, huh?” Taehyung teases.
Jungkook turns to look at Seokjin, his soft smile, the sparkle in his eyes. Jungkook thinks - no, he knows - that he’s looking at forever, that he’s so lucky to have found someone who’s completely perfect for him. His first, his last and his only.
“No, I really couldn’t.”