I cringe as I look at myself in the bathroom mirror.
I've never liked my body. I really self-conscious about it Aren't the Irish supposed to be lucky?
"Niall! Are you coming? We're gonna be late!" Zayn yells from downstairs.
I grab some random clothes and chuck them on.
I run downstairs. Zayn is waiting for me. He grins when he sees me.
"Finally" He says.
We walk out the door and hop into the van saying Hello to the other boys.
I'm sitting next to the window opposite Zayn and next to Louis.
For most of the ride, I'm staring at Zayn's perfectness.
Yes. I said. I'm gay. That adds more to my self-consciousness. And yes. I'm in love with my best mate.
Louis elbows me in the stomach.
"Stop staring he'll notice" Louis says with a wink.
Louis is the only one who has figured it out so far.
We arrive at the interview place and go in without stopping for the fans waiting there.
*skip interview cuz idk why*
I'm first out of the studio after the interview.
I cannot believe the interviewer would go there.
I'm about to cry so I run through a maze of corridors until I find a place that looks as though no one been here for years.
I find a cupboard and curl into the corner and cry.
I'm bawling my eyes out. I think about all the hate I get on Twitter, what the interviewer said and everything else that has ever hurt me.
I'm full on sobbing now.
"Niall?" I hear a soft voice say.
I curl up smaller into the corner.
"Nialler? Is that you?" the voice says again. I recognize it as Zayn this time.
"Nialler, shh.." Zayn says when he finds me.
He pulls me into a warm embrace, sitting down next to me in the cupboard.
I cry into his chest. He continues to try and calm me down and eventually i do.
"NiNi, what happened? What made you so upset?" Zayn asks.
"W-What the I-interviewer s-said-d" I hiccup.
"Awh Ni! Why would let the stuff get to you?" Zayn says.
""Maybe b-because i-its true" I say.
"No It's not Niall. Firstly, what she was saying about your looks. Thats no where near true Ni, just look at yourself. Secondly, So what if a few fans think you're gay? We all know its not true and thats all that matters right?" Zayn says and it just makes me cry harder.
I stand up, "What if it is true?" I say and start to walk away.
Zayn runs after me.
"What if whats true Ni?" He asks softly, stopping me with a hand on my arm.
"What if the fact that I'm a 'fugly gay faggot' who has a stupid crush on my best mate!?" I yell.
"W-what?" Zayn questions, he looks like he's going to faint.
"You don't get it do you?" I ask sarcastically, "Zayn I'm gay! I have been for years! And guess what? To make it worse, I'm in love with one if my best friends! Which one? You guessed it! It's you!"
Zayn just stares at me, a look of disgust in his eyes. He shakes his head.
It breaks my heart right in two.
I run out of the building.
Thankfully Louis is the only one there. I hop into the car with him and he wraps his arms around me.
"You told him?" He asks quietly.
I nod, bursting into tears again.
Louis just rubs my back and holds me while I cry into his chest.
I hear the door opening not long after.
"Ni?" Louis whispers.
"It's him isn't it?" I say looking up at Louis but only pulling away enough so It looks like I've stayed in the same position.
He nods. I bury my face back into his chest.
I stay quiet, buried in Louis' chest, even though I stopped crying, for the whole ride home.
I go back to Louis' instead of my house.
"Ni, can you tell me what happened? Why are you so upset?" Louis asks as we sit down on his couch.
"Well after the interview I was upset and he came and found me. And he told me that none of what the interviewer said was real and I said what if it is? And started walking away. But he caught up and asked what I meant and I flipped and yelled 'what if the fact im a fugly gay faggot who had a stupid crush on his straight best mate is true?' And he still didnt understand so I said '"You don't get it do you? Zayn I'm gay! I have been for years! And guess what? To make it worse, I'm in love with one if my best friends! Which one? You guessed it! It's you!' And he just looked at me like he was disgusted with me. And It broke my heart Lou!" I explain, silent tear running down my face.
Louis hugs me again.
After I calm down Louis says "You know if it makes you feel any better, I'm gay too you know?"
"Really?" I say.
I hug him again.
I fall asleep on Louis.
When I wake up, I'm laying on Louis' couch.
I realise I was woken by a knock in the door.
I look over and see Lou talking to Zayn at the front door.
Zayn sees me look at them and says "Niall? Is what you said seriously true?"
I start crying again.
"Oh perfect Zayn! Of course it's fucking true! Since when does Niall lie about his feelings?!" Louis practically shouts, coming over to hug me.
"I'm so sorry Niall! I never realised!" Zayn rushes over aswell.
"Ni-Bear, do you want me to leave you two alone?" Louis whispers in ear, not loud enough for Zayn to hear.
"I'll be in the kitchen" he smiles and walks out of the room.
"Ni I am so so so sorry! I honestly thought you were joking around!" Zayn says.
"Why the fuck would I joke about who I'm fucking in love with?!" I spit.
"I don't know. But to be honest? I thought it was to good to be true" he says.
It takes me moment to process what he's said.
"Wait- what?" I say totally confused.
"Niall I don't care that you're gay because I am too. The reason I know that is because I'm in love....with Niall fucking James Horan" Zayn says.
He did not just say that. No way. Does he really love me back?
"Y-You l-love me?" I ask shakily.
"Mhm." ZAyn says coming a tad closer, "Is it okay if I kiss you right now?"
He chuckles then presses his perfect lips against mine.
The kiss is so much more perfect then I ever could have imagined!
When he pulls away, I know my cheeks are red and I'm grinning like an idiot but I don't care.
All I care about right now is the perfect boy in front of me.
"Niall dispite the how I made you cry so much today, will you please make me so happy and be my boyfriend?" Zayn asks.
"Of course Z" I say and kiss him for the second time of hopefully many many more.
As we pull away all I can think about is the fact that maybe my Irish Luck is finally working.