“Why did you ask for me?” Daniel didn’t bother to keep the annoyance out of his voice.
“I didn’t.” came the deep throated reply from behind the curtain. “I asked for O’Neill. He said no.”
“And he didn’t shoot you?” All Daniel received in answer was a derisive snort. “Come to think of it, why didn‘t I shoot you?” he mumbled to mostly to himself. “Or at the very least the person who signed off on this little shopping trip from hell.” It had been part of a deal the captured Ba’al had made in exchange for providing ongoing intelligence about goa‘uld technology.
“Quite frankly, there was no one else.” The tone of Ba’al voice indicated that he would have rather had anyone else than Daniel along on this first excursion outside of the SGC in months.
“Teal’c, Sam…” Daniel ventured. “Any one of a number of the other SG teams.”
“The Jaffa have barbaric taste - not that I would go anywhere with that Sho’vah,” Ba’al answered contemptuously. “ And although I was once a female, I no longer am.” Daniel noticed the quickly covered change of expression on the men’s department clerk hovering nearby and signaled to one of the four MPs to move him along, distract him, anything. “Even if I were, I’ve noticed that in her off duty hours Lt. Col. Carter wears a disturbing amount of leather.”
It was Daniel’s turn to give a derisive snort. “I’ve heard Sam in leather described as a great many things but never - ”
At that moment the last of the Goa’uld system lords stepped from behind the dressing room curtain. He was dressed casually in blue jeans and was rolling up the sleeve of a casual button front shirt looking for all the world like an exotic high end fashion model. Out of the corner of his eye, Daniel noticed how a young woman walking past the men’s department slowed down as her attention was drawn to the darkly handsome man. Ba’al noticed her as well and flashing what Daniel hated to admit was a dazzling smile said invitingly, “Hello…”
As the young woman returned the smile and Ba’al made as if to walk over to her, Daniel signaled one of the MPs to be prepared to steer her away. He took a step towards Ba’al shaking his head firmly and saying, “No, no, no, no, no, no, no.” Placing himself in the gou’ald’s path Daniel frowned. “We’re here to pick up clothes not women.”
The expression on Ba’al’s face darkened menacingly and he looked for a moment as if his eyes might flash and he might go into his “I am your God!” routine. Allowing Ba’al out in public on the busiest shopping day of the year was a Very Bad Idea and Daniel wondered for the umpteenth time what the hell the powers that be were thinking by granting Ba’al’s demand.
In another part of his mind, Daniel marveled at how quickly Ba’al had moved. If he had intended to kill him, there would have been nothing anyone could had done to stop him but instead Ba’al grabbed Daniel, pulled him close and planted a big wet kiss on his mouth. From that moment on the phrase, “Black Friday” would forever cause Daniel to shudder uncontrollably.
Before a stunned Daniel could make a move to push him away, Ba’al released him with a wicked grin on his face. “Don’t be jealous,“ Ba’al cooed sexily in a voice meant to carry. “I told you not to worry darling. There’s no one in the world for me other than you,”
The strangled gasp from behind Daniel came not from the woman in the aisle but from one of the MPs. As Daniel’s head whipped around, both the MP and the young woman moved quickly away in opposite directions. Struggling to regain his composure Daniel turned back to the still grinning Ba’al who winked at him before turning to the waiting clerk.
“Where is your shoe department?” he asked pleasantly and followed by the remaining MPs who were studiously avoiding Daniel’s gaze moved in that direction.
“Somebody is definitely gonna get shot for this,” Daniel muttered darkly to himself as he followed angrily behind.