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Violins On The Brain, You In My Heart

Summary:

Kihyun thinks he's crazy, Hyunwoo made a mistake, and violins won't leave them alone. How Kihyun survived this night and the embarrassment that followed is beyond him.

Notes:

this is my showki debut so I'm lowkey nervous but I'm still super excited to share this with the fandom. I hope you guys like it <3

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Kihyun disliked a lot of things. 

He despised being late for class. He loathed waiting in line for his chicken nuggets at rush hour. And he especially disapproved of lairs. However, despite disliking most things that made the world revolve, Kihyun can’t find the strength in himself to hate something. He thinks it takes up too much energy to mull over a thought or feeling, only resulting in more anger on his end. 

He might say he hated things, like when Hyungwon gave him a personalized ugly Christmas sweater with the Grinch nursing a bad hangover accompanied by big red letters that read ‘Kihyun on a Good Day’. On the outside, Kihyun said he hated it and it’ll be introduced to the trash heap later that night. He lied (ironic, isn’t it?). He liked the sweater and he wears it to bed regularly because the material is very soft on his skin. 

Hate is a strong word that reflects emotions he rarely feels. So, when Kihyun claims he hates something, he doesn’t mean it. 

Until now, when he spotted two people across the cafeteria, giggling near the salad-bar. The ugly surge of jealousy reared its nasty head again and Kihyun, like all their other encounters, hated how it became a regular occurrence. 

“Ki, chill out. You’re killing that poor sandwich.” A pair of hands covered Kihyun’s white knuckles then gently pried his fingers off his now unrecognizable tuna sub. “The fish is already dead, you don’t have to harm it any more.”

Kihyun blinked then looked down at his finger indented bread. He squawked in realization at his ruined lunch then proceeded to clean his hands of gooey mayo. He frowned like a sad puppy as he rewrapped his sandwich in its plastic wrap. 

“Could you be any more obvious?” Minhyuk snickered. He slid over his hot wings to his friend with a smug grin.  

Kihyun scoffed, then stuffed his face to distract himself from Minhyuk’s knowing eyes. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Yeah, sure. It’s not like you just didn’t try to murder your sub because hyung was chatting it up with a girl.” An angry boil roared in Kihyun’s stomach. He felt his cheeks bloom with heat as Minhyuk’s grin turned into a smirk. Kihyun’s blaming it on indigestion from the wings and not how his friend rolled his eyes. “You practically tried to off her too.”

“Did not.”

“Did too.” 

Kihyun threw a fry at Minhyuk in a bout of annoyance. The salty weapon only landed in his mouth with no real damage done. “I wasn’t staring at hyung. I was reading the poster behind him.” 

“Oh, definitely, because you can see the words on a poster thirty feet away.”

Kihyun flopped forward onto the table with a loud groan, arms coming up to cover his head. “Can you shut up? For once?”

“Nope,” chirped Minhyuk, popping the ‘p’ at the end of the word. “Things would be so much easier, for all of us really, if you grew a pair and told him.” 

A stomp of his feet and shake of his head, then Kihyun mumbled a barely audible, “No.” Minhyuk sighed, just like all the other times they’ve had this conversation.

See, for all the things Kihyun disliked, there is an equal amount of things he does like. He enjoys cooking. He loves children, hence his pursuit in teaching. And Kihyun finds playing the piano to be a relaxing pastime. 

He also really likes Hyunwoo. A lot. Too much, to be exact. 

His crush on the older boy appeared sometime in his last year of high school. They went for three months without seeing each other after Hyunwoo graduated and moved on to college, which Kihyun has dubbed the worst three months of his life. He knew he felt something for his friend, he just didn’t know what it was until he was gone and Kihyun was left to figure out his confused feelings via Minhyuk and internet searches, the latter being way more helpful than the former.

Kihyun thought his situation of liking his best friend (“Wow, Ki, stab me in the heart why don’tcha.”) would only last a few weeks, maybe up until the end of summer if he’s lucky. He was wrong, so wrong it was laughable, and Kihyun hates being wrong.  

His crush festered over his third year of high school with the separation from Hyunwoo acting as fuel to the flame only for it to explode in a flurry of disgusting butterflies and sweaty palms when they reunited that following March. Kihyun never called himself a hopeless romantic, so he’ll deny that when they saw each other again on the first day of his freshman year his heart didn’t skip a beat and sappy violins didn’t play when they made eye contact. 

Okay, maybe his heart did stutter at the smile Hyunwoo gave him, but the violins definitely didn’t happen.  

“You know you have nothing to lose, right?” Minhyuk asked him. “Hyung likes you too.”

“No, he doesn’t. He would’ve told me. We both know he’s as blunt and straightforward as a brick wall.” Kihyun reached for another hot wing in an attempt to burn away the uncomfortable feeling clawing at his chest. They’re still at the salad bar and Hyunwoo is still laughing with her.

“Yeah, but he’s also kinda dense.”

“So?”

“So,” Minhyuk sing-songed. “He doesn’t know how to handle his feelings let alone a relationship. As you said, he’s blunt. Hyung just needs a push in the right direction.”

Kihyun turned his head then narrowed his eyes. “What are you saying?”

Minhyuk shrugged. He’s trying to repress that shit-eating grin but he’s failing miserably, the bastard. “You need to figure it out for yourself.”  

Another weapon of potatoey destruction flew his way, this time, hitting him square on the nose. Kihyun exclaimed a cry of victory but his triumph was short-lived when Minhyuk reciprocated by launching a piece of celery at his cheek. The pair laughed though their fun soon died down when Kihyun resumed his sulking. The girl, who Kihyun now recognized as one of Hyunwoo’s classmates, handed him a piece of paper. The boy accepted it then gave her one last smile before she sauntered away. 

Minhyuk reached across the table and rubbed Kihyun’s shoulder. “Look alive, lover boy, hyung’s coming over.” 

Kihyun had exactly 38 seconds to compose himself and diminish all negative thoughts that consisted of pushing the girl down a well before Hyunwoo slid into the seat next to him. When their shoulders brushed and Hyunwoo shot him a small smile, Kihyun’s positive an angry swarm of butterflies invaded his chest.

“Hey, what’s up?” Hyunwoo began unwrapping his chicken sandwich, completely ignoring the generous helping of salad he piled onto his tray. “What are you talking about?” 

“The weather,” Minhyuk said quickly. “But who cares? Hyung, who was that girl?” 

Kihyun stiffened in his seat. If Hyunwoo noticed, then he didn’t acknowledge how the younger boy took a sudden interest in the indents on the table. Minhyuk must think he’s being clever, asking Hyunwoo who she was and what she wanted with him as a ruse to answer Kihyun’s burning questions. Minhyuk’s not smart, he’s just nosey and wants to know everyone’s business.

“That was Hyojin, captain of the girls swim team.” Hyunwoo took a bite of his sandwich before continuing. “She asked me for English help, we’re meeting at the library tomorrow.” 

“What did she give you?” Kihyun blurted before he could even react. He bit his tongue to repress a heavy groan at his rushed words and Minhyuk’s side smirk. 

“Her email, though I don’t know why. I’ve had her number all year.”

Kihyun felt something in his chest sink. It’s no big deal. They’re both captains, they need each other’s numbers for the teams. Yeah, that’s it. 

“But don’t worry Ki, we can still meet afterward.” Hyunwoo nudged his arm. When Kihyun glanced up at him, his deep brown eyes seemed to shine. He also has a smidge of mustard at the corner of his lip that Kihyun has the urge to wipe away. “I didn’t forget about the movies. I’ll pick you up once I’m done with Hyojin.”

The younger nodded, feeling a tad better about their outing tomorrow. They’re going to see the new horror film that’s been giving everyone nightmares for the past week. Usually, Kihyun would drag Jooheon or Hyungwon to see it just to witness their screams of terror, but Hyunwoo asked him before he could corner the kids. He won’t say the violins appeared when Hyunwoo showed up at his shared apartment with a receipt for two tickets on his phone, but Kihyun will say his mood improved tenfold after that. 

Turns out at the mention of their hang out, Minhyuk also perked up. “Right! Your movie date!” 

It’s not a date , is what Kihyun wanted to say, but Hyunwoo’s enthusiastic nod caught him off guard. “Yeah, I’m looking forward to it.”

Somewhere in the depths of Kihyun’s brain, the first note of a simple melody played.

“Really? Then you should know that Kihyun wouldn’t shut up about it—” Minhyuk yelped when Kihyun’s foot collided with his shin. When he recovered from his fumble, he kicked back twice as hard. If looks could kill, both of them would be on the floor by now.

“He what?” Hyunwoo questioned, cheeks full of bread and eyebrows furred. The mustard smudge was still there. “Is something wrong?” 

The younger frantically waved his hands. “No, no, of course not! I’m just,” he paused, to do what, he doesn’t know, but when Hyunwoo looked at him with his full attention, Kihyun melted. “I’m excited too.” 

Hyunwoo swallowed the food in his mouth then gave Kihyun a million-watt smile. His cheeks rounded in that way that made Kihyun want to squish his face while his eyes completely disappeared. Kihyun needed to pinch his thigh to make sure that he was awake when Hyunwoo said, “I’m glad to. I wouldn’t want to go with anyone else but you.” 

The single note turned into a short burst of chords. Kihyun felt his cheeks flush, making him break eye contact before the elder could notice. He did though, so when he bumped Kihyun’s shoulder once more, Kihyun allowed himself to blush. 

A loud, drawn-out, “Awwwww,” broke them out of their moment. “You two are adorable, you know that?” Minhyuk cooed. His clasped hands rested against his cheek and his eyes swam with mirth. He looked like a smug asshole and Kihyun hates smug assholes. 

“S-shut up, Min,” Kihyun demanded. His cheeks burned and his friend's teasing wasn't helping them cool down. Something about the quip in his lip was offsetting. It made Kihyun’s stomach lurch. 

“Not today, buddy, sorry.” Minhyuk genuinely looked apologetic and, for a second, Kihyun believed him. However, it’s a shame Kihyun knew him too well to fall for his over enlarged puppy eyes. “Hyung, do you want to know why Ki’s so excited?” Hyunwoo couldn’t even respond before Minhyuk proudly exclaimed, “It’s because he likes you.”

Kihyun’s whole being felt like it was bitch slapped across the face. His insides coiled in fear, wounding tight in his gut until it felt like it could burst. The table grew quiet, which only made a horrible chill run across Kihyun’s body. Hyunwoo sat frozen, bread in his hand, mustard on his lip, and a face so full of pure confusion it was laughable. 

This is it. He hoped Minhyuk had a nice life because after today, Kihyun’s ending it in the most painful way possible. To hell with potato weapons, he’s going to find the biggest deep-fryer in Korea and roast his friend alive. 

“Yeah,” Hyunwoo said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “I like him too. I wouldn’t take him out to the movies if I didn’t.” 

The dread toiling in Kihyun’s stomach subsided. He stared at Minhyuk in disbelief only for him to mouth See? Dense

Kihyun should find a new best friend. He might be in his twenties, but with Minhyuk around he’s positive he won’t live to see 30.

“Are you alright, Kihyunie? You seem kinda shaken up.” Hyunwoo glanced at him and then—

Sweet Jesus, take me now.

Kihyun sat petrified as Hyunwoo leaned in and placed his forehead against his. He heard a squeak of surprise, from either himself or Minhyuk, he doesn’t know. He felt his heart in his throat as Hyunwoo wiped a hand on his jeans before cupping Kihyun’s cheek while remaining eye contact. 

If Kihyun ever felt like it was a good time to book it out of the cafeteria, it would be now. He might cause further confusion for his hyung and new blackmail material for his friend, but at least he saved his heart from cardiac arrest. If he dies before 30, he at least wants to make it to 27. 

Kihyun felt more than saw Hyunwoo’s eyebrows pinch together. “You’re warm, are you feeling okay? Should I take you to a doctor?” 

“Yeah, Ki, you’re lookin’ a little red,” Minhyuk taunted, lips pulled in a tight line to stifle his laugh.  

Screw the deep-fryer. Kihyun’s gonna kill him with a flimsy, plastic knife. If he wasn’t glued to his seat then his plan would be in action right about now.

“Kihyun?” Hyunwoo’s deep baritone voice broke him out of his murderous thoughts. With his eyes full of concern and mustard still on his lip, he asked if Kihyun was alright once more. 

“Y-yeah, never better,” he answered weakly, leaning away from the brunette so he could get some much-needed air into his lungs. Kihyun gently pushed Hyunwoo’s hand away from his face, already missing the warmth of his large palm on his cheek. “I just didn’t eat much. My, um, sandwich was bad.”

Hyunwoo blinked at him, then nodded. “Oh, well, you can have my lunch.”

“No, hyung, it’s fine—” It was useless. Hyunwoo pushed his tray full of greens and croutons in front of the younger boy, giving him a clean fork and opening the dressing packets for him before drizzling it over his salad. Kihyun’s heart jumped from his throat right into Hyunwoo’s palm before he could even register it was gone. He smiled at the elder, ducking his head so his fringe could hide the red of his cheekbones. “Thanks, hyung. How’d you know I liked cucumbers?” 

“Because whenever Minhyuk’s around you get them just to piss him off.”

The annoyance in question blanched, tongue out, and fingers down his gullet like he was puking. “They’re disgusting! I can’t believe those wannabe pickles are even in my sight.” 

The pair laughed, making Kihyun relax and realize how hungry he was. His tuna sub might’ve been salvageable, but the salad looked too good to pass up, especially if Minhyuk was scowling at the vegetables like it insulted his bloodline. So, just because Kihyun loves making his friend suffer, he stabbed the biggest piece and ate it like it was the tastiest treat in the world.  

Minhyuk gagged. “Ew, that’s it, I’m outta here.” He dramatically stood up and gathered his uneaten food. “Hyung, I hope you have a wonderful day,” his smile was sunshine and rainbows until he turned to Kihyun, turning his grin into a narrow-eyed glare, “and I hope you choke on your salad.” He left the table in a whirlwind of dramatics, taking his potato-weapons with him. 

“What’s with him?” Hyunwoo asked. “He’s been a little weird lately, are you two fighting?” 

“No, he’s just being...” Kihyun paused to think of a good explanation but came up empty. “Minhyuk.”

Hyunwoo chuckled goodheartedly as he took another bite of his sandwich. The mustard smudge grew bigger. “Maybe he wouldn’t be so tense if he found a girlfriend. It’s like he’s more interested in your life than he is with his own.” 

Kihyun couldn’t take it anymore. He grabbed a napkin and gripped Hyunwoo’s chin so he could face the younger. He wiped the corner of the brunette’s mouth, completely ignoring the intense gaze boring into his soul. 

“You can say that again. He’s been so crabby ever since Jooheon and Changkyun started dating. It’s like he lost his best friend, which is crazy because I’m...his best...friend…” Kihyun’s nerve endings froze over when he realized that Hyunwoo completely forgot about his sandwich and gathered Kihyun’s hands into his larger ones. The elder pried his fingers away from his chin and pressed forward until they were as close as earlier, noses brushing and chicken-scented breath mingling. The chords in his brain grew louder until they rang in his ears.

Please don’t be a dream. Please don’t be a dream. Please Please Please—

Much to his chagrin, it wasn’t a dream because most of Kihyun’s dreams that involve Hyunwoo end with them kissing. Instead, this real-life nightmare ended with the violins turning into a high pitched series of chirps that scared Kihyun so bad he jumped and slammed his head into the elder’s nose.

“Hyung! Oh my God, I’m so sorry! My phone—it scared me and—” Kihyun began to panic when Hyunwoo hunched over with his hand over his nose and shoulders shaking. “Shit, h-hyung is it bleeding? I’ll go get more napkins—”

A hand on his thigh kept him in place, warm and comforting. Only when Hyunwoo straightened up did Kihyun take notice of the hearty chuckles he thought was painful weeping. His nose was fine, a bit red from the impact but otherwise not bloody or broken, thank God. 

“You’re so cute, Ki,” he sighed more than said like he was just now realizing this obvious piece of information. “I’m fine, don’t worry. I’ve taken harder hits than that.”

“A-are you sure? I can get some ice—” the younger was abruptly shut up when Hyunwoo shoved another forkful of salad into his mouth. Kihyun frowned around the utensil, still not entirely convinced that the brunette is okay despite taking a forehead to the face. If Kihyun’s finger flicks are deadly, then his headbutts are a force to be reckoned with. 

Hyunwoo smiled again then ruffled Kihyun’s hair. “I’m perfectly fine, don’t worry about it. You might want to get that though,” he nodded to Kihyun’s blinking phone. 

When he reached for the device, heart beating wildly in his ribcage from both the embarrassment and scorching handprint left on his thigh, Kihyun either wanted to scream in frustration or choke Minhyuk until he’s blue. He’s choosing the latter. 

Minhyuk 

you know hyung doesn’t share his food with anyone. he likes you, dummy 

and I caught that little mishap on snapchat, who knew headbutts could be so romantic XD  

Kihyun bit his fork so hard he almost snapped the tongs off. Hyunwoo gave him a side-eye glance, watching him furiously type out every curse word he knew. “Everything alright?”

Kihyun was in the middle of threatening his friend with knife emojis and a promise of destroying all his beloved whale plushies if he didn't delete that video when he said, “I hate Minhyuk with a burning passion.” 

Hyunwoo giggled, a full-fledged jingle bell ring of hehehe like Kihyun is a cute dog trying to square up with a pitbull. The younger wants to say he disliked how Hyunwoo found his internal struggles entertaining, but his laugh is #5 on the list of things Kihyun loves, so he guesses that makes up for it. 


Out of all the things Kihyun hates, being indecisive is ranked in his top ten. 

Kihyun can’t make up his mind even if the world depended on it. He’s tried to change that over the years, though his anxious brain would run wild with second-guessed decisions and the menacing demon of what ifs. Even if it’s a simple task like choosing an outfit to wear to the movies with his crush of two and a half years for their ‘not-date’, the boy would mull over every little thing. So, just because Kihyun couldn’t choose between any of the clothes he picked out himself, he called in reinforcements. 

“How ‘bout this one?” Kihyun held up a plain white shirt over his naked torso. 

Hoseok stuck his tongue out. “Too bland.” 

He switched the material for a bright red graphic tee. “This one?”

Hyungwon gave a thumbs down. “Too loud.”

Kihyun groaned and threw the hangers into his closet then flopped face-first on his bed. He pounded flimsy fists onto his sheets like a toddler throwing a tantrum. His two friends laughed at his state of frustration much to Kihyun’s annoyance. 

“I don’t know why you’re stressing out over this, Ki.” Hyungwon plopped down beside him to start twirling strands of his newly dyed grey hair. “It’s just Hyunwoo-hyung, you know he doesn’t care about this sorta stuff.”

“I know,” he sighed. “I just want to, y’know, look good.”

“Why? Got something special planned for him?” Hoseok teased. When Kihyun glanced at him from his position, white sheets failing horribly to hide his burning blush, it seemed to click. “You’re gonna tell him?” He gasped.

Kihyun stayed quiet. He doesn’t know if he’ll confess, he’s still weighing his pros and cons list he made last night when his swarming thoughts were the only things keeping him company. Kihyun tossed and turned for hours trying to make sense of what happened yesterday in the cafeteria. He doesn’t know what prompted Hyunwoo to lean in close that second time, it couldn’t have been for another temperature check, no matter how much Kihyun tried to convince himself it was. 

And concluding Hyunwoo went in for a kiss is totally out of the question. He’s not Romeo but even Hyunwoo wouldn’t make a move in the school's overcrowded lunchroom. So Kihyun lay awake until the early hours of the morning, rolling every possible situation of Hyunwoo somehow liking him back in his mind until he fell asleep due to exhaustion. It’s a good thing they’re going to the nighttime showings or else Kihyun would’ve looked like an extra from the Walking Dead. 

“You have nothing to worry about, you know,” Hyungwon consoled. His fingers were soothing on Kihyun’s scalp. “Hyung’s had a thing for you since the dawn of time.”

“Yeah!” Hoseok agreed. “Back in high school, didn’t you ever notice how he always bought you your favorite snack for lunch?”

“Or how he offers to carry your bag around campus?”

“And how about when you got completely wasted and he gave you a piggyback ride back to your apartment?” The eldest concluded.

Kihyun peeked at both his friends to utter an uncertain, “He’s just being a nice hyung?”

He didn’t have enough time to brace himself for the onslaught of pillows thrown at him.

“Can you guys keep it down? I’m in the middle of something important!” Changkyun called from the next room over. 

“Video games aren’t important, Kyun!” Hyungwon countered. 

“Neither is your need for validation but here we are!” 

“You little—!” Before Hyungwon could launch himself off the bed and into Changkyun’s room, Hoseok caught him by the waist and pulled him into his lap. The raven-haired boy fumed but calmed down when his boyfriend chucked a stray pillow across the hall, hitting Changkyun hard enough to mess up his game. 

A strangled cry and several heavy footsteps later, the youngest of their friends appeared in the doorway with a headset around his neck and frown on his face. “I was just about to beat the last—what’s with him?” Changkyun pointed to the pile of clothes Kihyun draped himself over.

“He can’t pick an outfit for his date with Hyunwoo,” Hyungwon started.

“And he's debating if he should confess,” Hoseok continued. 

“And I’d appreciate it if you guys could shut up,” Kihyun finished. 

Changkyun whistled. “Damn, screw Hyungwon-hyung’s validation, you need a confidence boost. What time is your date?”

Kihyun didn’t have the strength to correct him that it’s not a date. It’s useless to get anything through his thick skull. “Six.” 

“It’s five forty-seven.”

“Oh shit!” Kihyun sprang from his bed to dive-bomb into his closet, tossing shirts and jeans behind him in his frenzied haste. “Why didn’t anyone tell me it was so late?”

“You never asked,” came the couple's reply. 

A slew of curse words flew from his mouth at losing track of time. Kihyun always had a good head on his shoulders but recently Hyunwoo makes him forget himself. It’s either because the younger is daydreaming about him or because he’s a tentative hot mess who has a habit of turning into an idiot around him. There’s no in-between. 

“Hyung!” Changkyun called in an attempt to get his attention from his whirlwind of clothes. It didn’t work, obviously, so he placed both hands on Kihyun’s shoulders and yanked him backward. “Calm down, I got you.” 

Kihyun couldn’t even register his words before a pair of denim jeans and a simple black shirt was thrust into his hands. He eyed the material, then switched his gaze to his roommate. “Are you sure?”

“Positive. Hyung likes dark colors and he likes you, so it’s a perfect match.” Changkyun tossed Kihyun a belt and white shoes after he wiggled into the pants. “Trust me. Do you think I landed Jooheon looking like this?” He gestured to his ratty sweatpants with holes and faded hoodie that time wasn’t nice too. He looked like the typical college student who sleeps through the day and games all night or a hermit living on Hot Cheetos and Mountain Dew. 

The other three boys all shared an incredulous look, then shook their heads. 

As Kihyun slipped into his shoes, he peered at himself in the full-length mirror next to his closet. Changkyun was right, he does look good. The colors compliment each other well, even going as far as to match his hair. He could practically see his confidence increase in the way he carried himself.

Hoseok wolf-whistled. “You look hot.”

“Damn right I do.”

“Alright Casanova, spray yourself with this and you’re all set.” Hyungwon passed him a bottle of cologne. Vanilla scented, Kihyun’s favorite. 

The doorbell rang the moment Kihyun was officially ready. His head snapped up at the sound, heart doing a little summersault at the anticipation of finally hanging out with Hyunwoo. Alone, without any of their friends to ruin any potential moment. If there’s going to be any, that is. 

Kihyun looked at the state of his room, clothes splayed out over his floor and closet in complete disarray. “We’ll clean it, don’t worry.” Changkyun grabbed his wrist and practically dragged Kihyun out of his room.

“Wait, I need a jacket—”

“No you don’t, you’ll be fine.”

“Kyun, it’s almost November. It’s freezing outside.” 

Changkyun stopped at the front door and placed both hands on Kihyun’s shoulders. He looked at the older boy fondly, like how one looks at a puppy. “You don’t, trust me. Have I ever been wrong?” Kihyun opened his mouth to rattle off a dozen things Changkyun’s done wrong within this past month, but the finger to his lips stopped him. “Don’t answer that. Make sure to be safe, don’t do anything stupid—”

“Like something you would do?” 

“Exactly,” the younger winked. “And just tell him, okay?” Changkyun sighed like he was also sick and tired of Kihyun kicking around the decision to confess. 

Kihyun didn’t answer him, he didn’t feel the need to. If the time is right, then he will. He can decide on that much. Before he opened the front door, he double-checked to make sure he had his wallet and keys then shot his three friends a nervous smile. 

“Thanks, guys.” They all waved him off with soft smiles. Hoseok even went as far as to fake cry into Hyungwon’s shoulder. 

Kihyun braced himself as he opened the door. Hyunwoo was waiting for him a few feet away from the threshold, looking nothing short of everyone’s dream date, hair hidden by a black cap and clothes dashing. His double layer of a dark hoodie and leather jacket made him cozy, perfect to hug if one’s feeling a bit chilly. 

“Hi,” he greeted, shutting the door behind him and fully stepping outside. 

Hyunwoo’s stare shifted from his shoes to his face, eyebrows raised and mouth slightly open. His eyes were as wide as quarters when he stuttered out a garbled noise, then he quickly composed himself like he just didn’t spend a few seconds checking Kihyun out. 

“Hey,” Hyunwoo smiled. “Ready to go?”

Kihyun nodded as they began walking to the elevator. “Are you ready to scream your head off?”

“You know I don’t get scared easily.” The elder pressed the button then they entered the lift. 

“I read an article saying this movie gave viewers nightmares for days!” 

“Should I be concerned that you’re excited about that? What if you get nightmares?”

“I won’t,” Kihyun countered. “Besides, I’m not afraid of fake blood and costumes.” 

“Well, if you are, then you can always hold my hand during the jump scares.” Hyunwoo nudged his shoulder the moment Kihyun went rigid. 

Did he just flirt with me? Is this flirting? Changkyun didn’t tell me how to flirt, what the hell am I supposed to do?

“Y’know, Ki, I’m really glad we’re going together.” Hyunwoo shyly glanced at him. He wore a small smile before he continued, “I know you wanted to go with the kids just to torture them, but I’m really happy you agreed to go with me.” 

Kihyun knew they were coming, but hearing them still caught him off guard. The violins in his brain began playing right as the elevator dinged and the sliding doors opened. He felt like he was on Cloud Nine as he mindlessly followed Hyunwoo to his car, footsteps light and heart soaring through the sky. Kihyun wanted to express his gratitude to his friend in poetic rhythms and an over the top gesture of his affection that most likely consisted of him crawling over the console and plopping himself right in Hyunwoo’s lap. Though, when he thinks about it, that second thought wouldn’t be the best way to tell Hyunwoo his feelings. It’s a little too exuberant for Kihyun’s taste. 

As they merged onto the main road with the sun just beginning it’s descent, casting a golden light onto Hyunwoo’s bronze skin, making him look even more unobtainable than Kihyun could ever imagine, he managed to throw caution into the win and graze his fingers over Hyunwoo’s knuckles on the gearshift. 

“I’m happy I’m going with you too.”

Red mixed with gold on the elder’s cheeks as he overturned his palm to grip Kihyun’s hand. They made eye contact for a split second before both boys bashfully turned away. When Hyunwoo released him to shift gears, Kihyun took notice of how he acknowledged the violins for the first time. He didn’t brush them off as a ruse in his head, a trick he was solely convinced that made him a bit crazy. 

When he glanced at his friend once more, he had a feeling that Hyunwoo could hear them too. 


“We have some time before the movie starts, do you wanna do anything?” The question was so innocent, polite even, though Kihyun could barely hear anything, let alone answer, over the wild pounding of his heart.

Once they arrived at the shopping center, the pair entered the theaters and was met with the heady aroma of buttered popcorn and overpriced movie snacks. After receiving their ticket stubs from the front, Hyunwoo excused himself to find the restroom, which left Kihyun to wander the area alone. He was absorbed in his thoughts once more as he eyed the new movie displays scattered around the cinema, thinking of the perfect time to confess to his friend, when said friend came up behind him and slipped an arm over his shoulders. 

Hyunwoo’s body heat felt nice against Kihyun’s side, especially since he grew cold once they stepped into the air-conditioned building. Their height difference is perfect to where, if Kihyun wanted too (and he really wants too), he could turn and bury his face in Hyunwoo’s neck.

He’s never been opposed to physical contact, Kihyun himself is quite clingy when he wants to be while Hyunwoo is a living, breathing, hugging machine. Being swaddled in his strong arms against his hard chest is ranked second on Kihyun’s love list. For obvious reasons. 

“There was a game I wanted to play.”

Hyunwoo smiled at him. “Lead the way.”

Kihyun could hear the violins pick up speed until they matched the beat to his jack-hammer heart. His knees felt weak as they walked to the bundle of games nestled in the corner of the theaters like he could collapse any second due to pure nerves or how Hyunwoo held him close. Frankly, Kihyun could shut down right now from just being in breathing proximity of him.

There’s one thing on both of Kihyun’s lists that hold equal value: his massive crush on Hyunwoo. Kihyun hates how one look, a single action, or choice of words can make him melt into a puddle of love-sick goo. Though the times when Hyunwoo displays affection to the younger ones or takes care of Kihyun when he’s blackout drunk are a part of the many reasons why being madly in love with his best friend is even on his good list. Kihyun is positive there’s nothing he likes more than knowing his heart belongs to Hyunwoo. 

“A claw machine?” He questioned when they arrived at the gaming corner.

Kihyun detached himself from Hyunwoo and stood with his nose pressed to the glass. He scanned the display case full of toys and trinkets until his eyes landed on a single stuffed brown bear. 

“That one,” he stated. “I want that one.” 

He reached for his wallet, fully committed to spending however much it takes for him to win that bear, but stopped short when Hyunwoo presented him with a crisp bill. Kihyun thanked him and inserted the money into the slot then focused his mediocre claw machine skills onto the game. When he positioned the claw over the bear and pressed the button, his excitement peaked when the toy was safely in its grasp.

That moment didn’t last long, however, because the bear fell once the claw jerked towards the drop-box. Feeling irritated, Kihyun tried again. And again. And again until his temper turned borderline furious and he burned a small hole in Hyunwoo’s wallet. 

“This game is stupid.”

“It’s okay, Ki, these things are rigged anyway,” Hyunwoo consoled with a comforting hand on his shoulder. “C’mon, the movie's about to start and we didn’t get our popcorn yet.”

Kihyun allowed the brunette to lead him to the concession stand, trying to ignore how Hyunwoo’s hand descended to the small of Kihyun’s back. He can’t log off here, not in front of a family of four and a pair of twelve-year-olds getting extra mustard on their hotdogs. Kihyun knew if he were to stop dead in his tracks and faint due to the amount of swooning he’s done tonight, it’ll only worsen because Hyunwoo would definitely catch him in his arms.

The shorter boy ran on autopilot as they ordered their snacks. Hyunwoo’s hand didn’t move, until they went to pay, much to Kihyun’s chagrin. Once again, Kihyun brought out his wallet only for the elder to stop him. 

“I got it, don’t worry,” he said.

“It’s okay, hyung, I don’t mind—”

“Kihyun, it’s fine. I wanna pay for you.” The way Hyunwoo said his name made goosebumps erupt over the younger’s skin. 

The cashier, an older woman who looks like she’d rather be anywhere but at work, gave them a polite smile as she accepted Hyunwoo’s credit card. “You’re lucky, kid. I wish my boyfriend paid for my food.”

At the term ‘boyfriend’ Kihyun instantly went into overdrive. Is that what they look like? A couple? Kihyun finally accepted the thought of calling their hangout a date, but people assuming they’re boyfriends? No, that’s too much for his weak heart. 

“We’re not toget—” Kihyun began but was rudely cut off when Hyunwoo spoke over him.

“He sounds shitty. You should dump him.” 

The woman chuckled. “I tried but he always comes crawling back.” She handed Hyunwoo back his card and receipt. “You kids enjoy your movie.”

They walked out of line to the side counter to pick up extra napkins and straws for their drinks. As Hyunwoo immediately went to the butter dispenser, Kihyun’s mind was running a mile a minute. 

Hyunwoo didn’t correct her. He didn’t even acknowledge the fact that she assumed they were boyfriends. Did it go over his head? Most things do, but this simple mistake is larger than putting salt in his coffee instead of sugar. 

(Changkyun and Minhyuk wanted to play a harmless prank on their hyungs, which resulted in Hoseok spitting his drink out and Hyunwoo continuing like nothing was wrong. To this day, they still couldn’t figure out if he noticed or if he didn’t care.) 

“You seem kinda out of it,” Hyunwoo commented when he returned to Kihyun’s side. “Penny for your thoughts?” 

“Oh, um. I w-was just wondering why you…” Kihyun paused his words. He can’t question it now, he’d need more than a penny to make sense of what he’s thinking of. He doesn’t want to cause any awkwardness on both their ends if Hyunwoo’s answer isn’t what he was expecting. So, Kihyun will ignore it for now. He cleared his throat then picked up where he left off. “I was wondering why he bought a small, you always get a large popcorn.” 

Hyunwoo bashfully looked at the bag that was barely bigger than his hand. “Coach says I should cut down on eating. I gained a bit of weight during the offseason, might go on a diet soon.” 

“And drowning your popcorn in butter is going to help with that?” Kihyun giggled. 

“Hey, I’m taking baby steps.” Hyunwoo poked the younger’s side, making his giggles turn into full-on laughter. 

“You don’t need to change anything about yourself, y’know. I like you just the way you are, chubs and all.” 

If there was a Moment, between the two, then right now would be it. Hyunwoo stared at Kihyun like he gave him the world on a silver platter, eyes shining and smile brighter than the stars. Kihyun lost track of how many times he’s been rendered breathless because of the elder but this one is the most memorable. 

“You really think so?” Hyunwoo stepped closer to him, making Kihyun crane his neck to return his gaze. 

“Of course. Hyung, you’re very handsome and you have a great body, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.” Kihyun’s voice came out strong, confident. He has his bout of insecurities that he struggles with, but he won’t tolerate one of the most attractive men he ever met feeling like he should go on a diet. Diets are stupid, Kihyun should know, he just gave up on his previous one when he was craving oreo ice cream at 2am. 

Hyunwoo’s eyes never left his face as he brought a hand up to cup Kihyun’s cheek. His thumb stroked under his eye, and for the first time that night, Kihyun allowed himself to lean into the touch. 

“I like you just the way you are too.” 

The violins were back and turned onto the Bass Boosted setting. They played an intense mantra that shook Kihyun right to his bones.  

Tell him! Do it now! 

Kihyun’s hand clutched Hyunwoo’s jacket sleeve. He felt his body tremble as he took a deep breath then started the brunette right in the eyes. “Hyung, I want you to know that I—”

There was a loud sound over the cinema’s intercom then a bored voice stated, “Theater three, theater three. The film in theater three is starting in five minutes. Thank you.”

Hyunwoo removed the hand on Kihyun’s cheek to fish their tickets out of his pocket. “Shit, Ki, that’s us. We better hurry if we want good seats.” 

The smile on Kihyun’s lips was forced, but he’s grateful Hyunwoo turned away before he could question it. “Yeah, let's go.”

Maybe now isn’t the right time. The universe is trying to tell him something, leading him in the right direction to confess. It has practically been throwing Hyunwoo at him for the past hour in the form of soft touches and sweet words. It’ll tell Kihyun when it’s the right time. 

Or it likes fucking with him. 

When the pair entered the theater, almost all the seats were gone except for the ones in the back closest to the exit. The love seats, a large reclining chair with no armrest for separation, and two pillows for comfort. The perfect cuddling opportunity for all couples alike, or in Kihyun’s case, the final straw towards his composed demeanor.

Kihyun tried to reason with him, saying there are probably better seats at the front, but his words got lodged in his throat when Hyunwoo gently pulled him down to his side. He pushed a button and reclined their chair so both were comfortable, despite Kihyun’s internal screaming. 

The opening previews started just as Hyunwoo slung his arm over the back cushion. “You doing okay?” 

Kihyun was more than okay, he was doing fantastic if he ignored how his entire side tingled from being pressed against his friend. As a trailer for the next blockbuster hit played, explosions, and gunfire echoing throughout the room, Kihyun could only give a feeble nod in response. Hyunwoo seemed content with that answer, then he began shoveling handfuls of popcorn into his mouth, totally oblivious to the raging storm of butterflies in Kihyun’s stomach. 

If it’s not musical instruments occupying his brain, it’s insects making a permanent home in his intestines. All night, Kihyun felt like he could combust just being near Hyunwoo. It isn’t healthy for his heart or blood pressure, he’s sure of it, but this is the happiest he’s been in a long time. Hyunwoo can make him forget himself, ignore all their surroundings and just focus on the now, focus on him. Kihyun’s thoroughly convinced it’s a superpower. 

So, in an act of pure self-indulgence, Kihyun will give himself over to the power. He scooted closer to the elder, fully glued to his person and soaked in the warmth blooming in his chest. Hyunwoo must’ve taken this as a good sign because the second Kihyun fully relaxed, he draped the arm across the back cushion over his shoulder. 

“Is this okay?” He hummed.

This time Kihyun nodded with more assurance. “Definitely.” 

Hyunwoo smiled at him before sighing into the seat, limbs loose and body at ease. He resumed inhaling his popcorn before the room went completely dark. The movie began and right as the eerie music played during the opening scene, Kihyun heard violins. 


Not many people like horror movies, but Kihyun loves them. The spike of fear he gets when the camera pans to a calm scene then something pops out, how goosebumps crawl across his skin when the supernatural get their hands on a victim and makes them scream bloody murder, Kihyun enjoys every second of it.

However, even if he said he loved horror films, he’s only human, he will get scared at certain points. So, if his hand clutches Hyunwoo’s while they’re sharing Kihyun’s popcorn (his bag never stood a chance), then he’ll play it off as reflexes. Though that excuse can only go so far. After the second time of Kihyun grabbing Hyunwoo’s fingers, digits buttery and kinda gross, the elder finally spoke up about it. 

“My offer still stands,” he whispered in Kihyun’s ear, making tingles run down his spine.

Kihyun pinched the back of his palm. “I’m not scared.” 

Hyunwoo only shrugged. In the dim lighting, Kihyun could just barely make out his teasing smirk. Just because he hasn’t jumped or screamed once since the movie began doesn’t mean anything. Hyunwoo might not be afraid of blood or ghosts, but the look of pure terror on his face when he dropped his hamburger will always be etched in Kihyun’s mind (and on Hyungwon’s camera roll). 

By the time the movie ended, Kihyun’s skin prickled and he felt like his heart rode a rollercoaster. The pair remained seated in their chair, mostly because they didn’t want to be caught up in the rush of people exiting the theaters and partly because Kihyun felt so content leaning into Hyunwoo’s side that he didn’t want to leave.

“Did you like it?” He asked. 

“Well, it definitely wasn’t a Disney movie,” Hyunwoo chuckled. He removed his arm from Kihyun’s shoulders to stretch above his head. A series of loud pops erupted from his joints as he yawned. Kihyun giggled when he sunk into the cushions, cap covering his eyes. 

“C’mon, don’t sleep in the theaters.” 

“There’s no rule saying I can’t.” 

“We’re gonna get kicked out.” 

“Sshhh,” Hyunwoo shushed. “I’m one with the pillows.” 

Kihyun couldn’t take it anymore. He burst into laughter and slumped onto Hyunwoo’s shoulder, clutching his stomach. The elder joined him until they were the only ones in the theaters. When Kihyun ceased his mirthful cackles to gaze at his friend, Hyunwoo was already staring. Kihyun cleared his throat, hoping his popcorn breath wasn’t noticeable. 

“Will you get up if I said we can get ice cream before going home?” 

Hyunwoo didn’t even wait for him to finish before he was on his feet. “You should’ve said that in the first place.” He pulled Kihyun up by his sleeve and ushered him out the door with a hand on his back. 

After spending almost three hours snuggled up to him, Kihyun learned to control his beating heart at the closeness, however, his stomach still surged with butterflies when Hyunwoo’s hand traveled down to his waist. Kihyun also learned to embrace the oncoming swarm. It’s a nice feeling, in his opinion.  

The two left the theaters, eyes still adjusting to the blinding lights of the main entrance. They were about to make their way to the exit when Kihyun said he needed to use the restroom. Hyunwoo nodded and pointed to an open corner where he’d wait for him. 

“Hurry back,” he insisted, before reluctantly letting the smaller boy go. 

When Kihyun entered the washroom, he immediately pulled his phone out from his pocket and read the hordes of text messages from both Changkyun and Minhyuk. 

Minhyuk 

enjoy your date!! 

sweep hyung off his feet with your annoying charms and weird way of making him do what you want 

ok you’re not responding so i’m assuming it’s going well 

i’ll let you get back to that~~~

;)

Changkyunie

lmao hyung texted hoseok-hyung saying he’s nervous 

you make him nervous, that’s a good sign 

also, i heard the theaters have new couple seats, try not to get frisky with him in a public setting, please 

but if you do then i slipped some condoms and lube in your wallet just in case lol

Kihyun reread the last message then scrambled for his wallet and, sure enough, there were three packets he knew he didn’t put in there. With his cheeks ablaze, he furiously typed a long-winded message to Changkyun about how they didn’t ‘get frisky’ and how he doesn’t feel comfortable knowing his younger roommate had those on hand. It’s like knowing your little brother has a sex life and you don’t, sad and unwanted. 

He didn’t bother replying to Minhyuk because he’ll most likely already be at Kihyun’s apartment when he gets back to hear about his date. He should get the snacks ready because Kihyun has a story to tell. 

After relieving himself and thoroughly washing his hands, Kihyun made his way back outside but was met with an unnerving sight.

Hyunwoo was right where he said he’d be, leaning against the wall in the corner, scrolling through his phone. He seemed oblivious to his surroundings, caught up in his own little world and unaware of the trio of girls checking him out. They huddled near a movie poster, pretending to be interested in the cast list while also pushing one of the girls in Hyunwoo’s direction. 

Kihyun felt the little green monster rear its ugly head again. He didn’t like how the girl practically ogled at him, giving him a slow once over from head to toe. It’s not Hyunwoo’s fault that he’s extremely attractive, Kihyun himself is constantly admiring his physique, though when someone else does, it makes an uneasiness simmer in his stomach.   

The girls continued to check out Hyunwoo shamelessly, until the one being pushed finally stepped forward and squared her shoulders. She shot her friends a confident smile before she made her way over to him. 

By this time, red alarms blared in Kihyun’s head. He didn’t want her to talk to him, he didn’t even want her to be near him. Sharing is shining brightly at #8 on his dislike list, so, like any other reasonable individual might do, Kihyun marched up to Hyunwoo before the girl could even cross the distance to him. 

Kihyun linked his arm with the elders, sliding his hand down to slip into Hyunwoo’s own and gave him a blinding smile. “Hey,” he greeted. “Ready?” 

For the second time that night, Kihyun saw Hyunwoo’s cheeks bloom a deep red. He could only nod as Kihyun dragged him away from the wall and the girl who stopped dead in her tracks. As they walked away, Kihyun couldn’t help but look back and give her a side-eye. 

He’s not one to be spiteful, but Kihyun will acknowledge the triumphant feeling that washed over him to be very nice. This new feeling is now ranked in his top ten on his liked list. 

Hyunwoo could barely hold his snickers once they left the building. He squeezed Kihyun’s hand and gave him a snort of amusement. 

“Jealous much?” He teased. 

Kihyun upturned his nose away from him. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” 

“Sure you don’t. It’s not like I didn’t see how you intercepted that girl from talking to me.” 

Ah, he’s caught red-handed and red-cheeked. 

Hyunwoo chortled again. His thumb began rubbing small circles on the back of Kihyun’s palm. “It’s okay. I wouldn’t want anyone else talking to you either.” 

Damn it, this boy is gonna be the death of me.  

Kihyun let out a strangled noise that resembled a choking cat then buried his face in Hyunwoo’s arm. His heart was in his throat once again so Hyunwoo can’t blame him for not continuing the conversation. 

The walk to the ice cream parlor was short, not lasting more than five minutes. When they arrived, Hyunwoo detached himself from Kihyun to open the door for him, making the younger boy give an exaggerated bow in thanks. They eyed the different varieties of flavors in the display case though Kihyun already knew what he wanted. Before he could get Hyunwoo’s attention, he was already ordering. 

“One samanco sandwich and mint chip cone please.” 

Kihyun stared at him as he paid for the dessert, completely taken aback. “How’d you know I wanted that?” 

Hyunwoo threw him a smile. “Because I know it’s your favorite flavor, right next to Mother is an Alien and Almond Bong Bong.” 

Kihyun’s eyebrows shot to his hairline. Not even Minhyuk can remember his favorite flavors, though Hyunwoo managed to name all three. Kihyun’s heart melted on the spot.

The worker handed them their treats then they went to find a bench outside. Kihyun wasn’t even a quarter of the way through with his cone when a violent shiver cascaded down his back. Hyunwoo immediately noticed with worry etched on his face. 

“Are you cold?”

No, is what Kihyun wanted to say, but he’s eating ice cream on a chilly October night with no coat. He can’t fool anyone. 

“Just a little. It’s nothing I can’t handle, don’t worry about it.” Kihyun patted his knee in reassurance, though it didn’t work because Hyunwoo was already stripping off his leather jacket. His ice cream sandwich dangled from his mouth, threatening to fall if Kihyun didn’t carefully grab it before Hyunwoo removed his arms from the sleeves. He draped the jacket over Kihyun’s shoulders then took back his sandwich like he just didn’t make the butterflies in Kihyun’s stomach explode. 

Hyunwoo retook his seat on the bench, closer than before, probably in an attempt to warm Kihyun up. Jokes on him though, Kihyun’s practically on fire now. “Better?”

“Y-yeah. Thank you.” Kihyun returned to eating his ice cream and ignored how the jacket was too big on him. He practically swam in it, the shoulders felt huge and the sleeves went past his hands, making Hyunwoo coo at him. When the elder went to pinch his cheeks and Kihyun pushed his hands away, that’s when he caught a whiff of Hyunwoo’s cologne. He brought the sleeve to his nose then inhaled. “Is that vanilla?”

Hyunwoo nodded. “I thought of you when I bought it. I know you like vanilla-scented stuff.” 

Hyunwoo was on a roll tonight. He knew Kihyun’s favorite ice cream flavors, scents, and his weakness for cliche gestures like opening doors and giving him his jackets. If Kihyun wasn’t so smitten already then he’s positive he would’ve fallen for Hyunwoo all over again. 

They conversed as they ate their treats. Hyunwoo’s sandwich was gone within minutes, how he didn’t get a brain freeze is beyond Kihyun’s knowledge. In his haste to eat, some of it ended up on his chin. Kihyun didn’t even think twice before he swiped the dollop with his thumb then licked the digit clean. He pretended he didn’t see Hyunwoo’s Adam’s apple bob nervously or the red of his ears for both of their sanities. 

A strange sense of deja vu washed over him, though Kihyun didn’t want to think of that. He’s been overthinking too much. So, instead of thinking why? and how? and what if, Kihyun will rest his mind for the night. Their date is coming to an end and he doesn’t need his brain working into overdrive. 

For their remaining time together, he wants to feel instead of think. Kihyun would rather focus on Hyunwoo’s hand slipping back into his almost like second nature as they walked back to the car than let his mind wander anymore. 


Kihyun said he’d let his tired brain rest for the rest of the night, which, in hindsight he did. The car ride from the shopping center to his apartment was full of lingering touches and uncontrollable laughter. It was easy to forget how a dark cloud loomed over him when Hyunwoo was cracking cheese jokes that left Kihyun gasping for air.

Though, when they arrived at his building and Hyunwoo got out of the car to open the passenger’s door then walked him to his floor, Kihyun finally realized the cloud was right above him. It’s large and grey, hovering over his head like a cartoon. He doesn’t like it, he’d rather have the violins. 

When they made it to Kihyun’s front door, the realization of their date ending finally arose. It’s a hollow feeling, something he doesn’t enjoy. It’s now ranked in his top ten on his dislike list. 

Hyunwoo stood before him with his hands in his pockets, eyes shifting to everything except Kihyun. Kihyun cleared his throat to thank him for the night and Hyunwoo finally looked at him. The butterflies returned in tenfold. 

Kihyun shifted on his feet, then said, “I had lots of fun tonight.” 

“Me too. I know I keep saying this, but I’m really happy you came with me.” Hyunwoo shyly smiled at him. And just when Kihyun thought he couldn’t get any cuter, Hyunwoo continued to surprise him. “And, um, I got you something.” 

Hyunwoo pulled out a Beanie Baby from his hoodie pocket, a small brown bear. Its snout was a bit squished in while its ear had a tear at the seams. It seemed old like not many people wanted to win it, though it was cute, in an endearing sort of way. 

Hyunwoo bashfully rubbed the back of his neck, not meeting Kihyun’s eyes again. “I won it while you were in the restroom.” He handed Kihyun the toy, completely oblivious to the goofy smile on his face. “I wanted to surprise you, to give you a, y’know, good memory. Like in those cheesy, romantic movies. The guy always gives his date a gift at the end. I know you wanted the bigger one, but this was easier. If you don’t want it then it’s fi—umph!

Hyunwoo’s rambles were cut short when Kihyun launched himself forward with too much force than necessary. He couldn’t contain the amount of adoration he held as he sprung into Hyunwoo’s arms with no other thought than to hug the life out of him. Kihyun buried his face in Hyunwoo’s chest and waited until he hugged back to let out a breathy sigh.

“Hyung, I love it. Thank you so much.”

“Really? It’s kinda ugly,” Hyunwoo chuckled. “I didn’t think you’d like it this much, but I’m happy you do.” 

Kihyun’s heart did something he knew wasn’t natural or healthy. Kihyun nuzzled into the embrace, relishing in how Hyunwoo pulled him close until they were flush together. Somewhere in the back of his mind, the violins quietly restarted their tune.

Hyunwoo pulled back enough to where he could peer at Kihyun’s face. He smiled at him, the kind where his mouth would stretch wide and his eyes turned into crescent moons. It was Kihyun’s fourth favorite thing on his list, right next to fifth, which was his laugh, and his jokes, ranked at number three. 

Kihyun felt lighter than air. The dark cloud over him dissipated completely, shining bright, artificial light from the ceiling above. The violins grew louder, telling Kihyun what he already knew he had to do. He took a deep breath and when he looked into Hyunwoo’s eyes, Kihyun realized he had nothing to fear in the first place.

“I like it, hyung, I really do. And I like you.” 

Hyunwoo brushed a stray piece of hair away from his face. “I know. I like you too.” 

Kihyun scrunched his nose when the elder booped it. Maybe he doesn’t understand the difference between like and like like. It’s a common mistake. “No. Hyunwoo-hyung, I like you. I want to go out on real dates with you and hold your hand and maybe kiss you. I want to be your boyfriend, if you’d have me, that is.” 

Hyunwoo stared at him, blinking owlishly until he cocked his head to the side and furrowed his brows. It would’ve been a cute sight under different circumstances, like if Kihyun just didn’t confess his desire to date his long time best friend while in said best friend's arms. He wishes he could at least escape and hide in the comfort of his room. Kihyun’s still wearing his jacket and it’s getting a bit hot under the awkward silence. 

“H-hyung? Did you hear me? I kinda just confessed to you,” Kihyun nervously said. “It would be nice for you to at least reject me verbally.” 

Hyunwoo finally seemed to snap out of his daze but his expression was still highly confused. He gapped his mouth like a fish, trying to find the right words for rejection, but stepped away from Kihyun, taking his shattered heart with him. 

Kihyun laughed, a bitter sound that just made him angrier. He was naive to think Hyunwoo had any sort of feelings for him, even if this date had clear intentions of what it was and how Hyunwoo felt. Or, how he supposedly felt. Kihyun was blind, a blind boy in love who read too much into the situation and got his hopes up for nothing. He clutched the bear in his hands in a death grip to cease his shaking. It didn’t work though. The violins stopped playing completely. 

He’s crossing everything off his list because there’s nothing in the world Kihyun’s hates more than this moment.

“You know what? Nevermind. Just forget I said anything, okay?” Kihyun began backing up to his door, ready to make a run for it. “It was a stupid idea. I shouldn’t have assumed you felt the same, I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable or even ruined our friendship. Can we pretend that this didn’t happen? For both of us?”

Hyunwoo remained silent. His eyebrows drew closer together the more Kihyun tried to erase his misconception until he took notice of Kihyun’s hand on the door handle. His eyes refocused then he shook his head. “I don’t understand.” 

“And that’s okay! You don’t need to reciprocate my feelings. I’ll get over them, I prom—”

“No no no.” Hyunwoo waved his hands in the air to cut Kihyun off. “I don’t get it.”

It was Kihyun’s turn to be confused. “Don’t get what?”

Hyunwoo removed his hat and raked his hand through his hair, then in a distressed tone, he asked, “Aren’t we already dating?”

Uh. Come again? 

Kihyun gazed at him like he grew a second head, then squeaked out a very intelligent, “What?

“Aren’t we dating?” Hyunwoo repeated. “I thought you were already my boyfriend.”

“No! Wh-why would y-you think that?” Kihyun spluttered. 

“Because I asked you?” 

“When?”

“Two weeks ago? When I asked you out to dinner that Friday?” 

Cold hands gripped Kihyun’s throat. A sense of shock shot through his body at the remembrance of, yes, Hyunwoo did ask him out to dinner two weeks ago. Kihyun’s bewilderment only increased when Hyunwoo continued talking.

“Didn’t you know that was a date?” 

“No! We went to McDonald’s! How was I supposed to know that was a date?” 

“Because I asked ‘Do you want to go on a date to McDonald’s?’!”

“Hyung!” Kihyun groaned. “McDonald’s isn’t romantic at all. I thought we were just hanging out!” 

Hyunwoo’s eyes were practically out of its sockets. His entire face was cherry red, making him resemble those squishable toys available at the convenience store. He somehow still managed to look adorable even when he’s extremely embarrassed. 

“So you had no idea that I asked you out?” Kihyun shook his head, his own embarrassment was vivid on his face. “And that we’ve been dating since then?”

“Of course not! How was I supposed to know?”  

“I walk you to class? I call you every night? We spend almost every day together?” Hyunwoo covered his face with his hands. He shook his head in devastation then told Kihyun in an exasperated tone, “I even tried to kiss you yesterday, Ki!”

If there was ever a moment where Kihyun wanted the floor to swallow him, it would be right now. He stayed rooted to his spot as his mind recalled every single interaction between the two from that Friday till now. Hyunwoo has done all the things he said. He’s been extra affectionate towards Kihyun, going out of his way to make sure he’s always beside him and even going as far as to admit that he did attempt to kiss Kihyun in the cafeteria—

Holy fuck.  

Forget the floor swallowing him, Kihyun will just crouch down and curl into a ball, hoping his mortification will burn him alive. He shrunk into the jacket, using its collar to hide his blazing face. He didn’t want to look at Hyunwoo and come to the horrifying realization that they’ve been dating for two weeks without him knowing.

“Ki? Aw, c’mon, Kihyun, don’t cry.” Hyunwoo was instantly in front of him, gently coaxing Kihyun to open up. “It’s my fault, I shouldn’t have assumed anything. You know I’m not great with relationships and—”

“Hyung?” Kihyun croaked. 

“Yeah?” 

“Shut up.” 

“Okay.”

Kihyun took a few calming breaths to even his heart rate. His throat still felt constricted, tight enough to choke him but his body soon relaxed when he felt a warm hand rub soothing circles on his back. Kihyun picked himself up after his breathing regulated, though the anxiousness in his stomach still made him queasy. 

Hyunwoo cleared his throat, making Kihyun shift his gaze from his shoes to his face. The blush on his cheeks disappeared along with the panic in his eyes. He still looked mildly humiliated, but Kihyun probably doesn’t look any better. 

The elder took a step forward to fix Kihyun’s crooked jacket. Kihyun let him, mostly because it’s his and partly because he needed reassurance that things are okay. “I guess I should start from the beginning?” 

Kihyun nodded. “That’ll be nice.” 

It was quiet in the deserted hallway. The buzzing of the overhead lights played as background noise as Hyunwoo rolled the words around in his mouth. He picked at the edge of his hat just to keep his hands busy. 

“So, um, I knew you liked me.” 

Ah, getting right to the point. Straightforward as always.

“Was I that obvious?” Kihyun questioned. 

“No, not really.” Hyunwoo shrugged. “But I like you too so that was a huge relief. I only noticed it a few weeks ago, that’s when I asked you out.” 

“To McDonald’s.” 

Hyunwoo covered his face again. His ears were tinted red when he asked, “You’re not gonna let me live that down, are you?” 

“Nope,” Kihyun agreed. “A fast-food restaurant is the last place I’d think to go for a first date.” 

“That still doesn’t explain how you didn’t pick up on me openly flirting with you any chance I had.” 

“If you were flirting then I never noticed.” 

“Obviously.” 

They shared a laugh, lighthearted, and deprived of any tension. Kihyun felt better knowing Hyunwoo reciprocates his feelings, but their mutual embarrassment is and will haunt them for the rest of their lives. 

“So, when I said yes and then we ate...” Kihyun paused, squeezed his bear, then continued. “Did you think we were together? Like, together together?” 

Hyunwoo snorted. His smile returned and so did the note of a single chord. “Yeah, I did. We shared fries and a sundae, I was pretty convinced we were dating.” 

“To you, sharing food is like a marriage proposal,” Kihyun teased. “I honestly didn’t see a change in our relationship. It felt normal to me.” 

“That just proves it.”

Kihyun raised an eyebrow. “Proves what?”

Hyunwoo stepped closer until there was barely an inch of space between them. “That we’re domestically sickening and our regular relationship isn’t different from a romantic one.”

Kihyun flopped forward in a fit of laughter and rested his head against Hyunwoo’s chest. Hyunwoo followed soon after, chuckling along with him as a hand came up to cup the back of Kihyun’s head. A thumb began stroking the downy soft hair at his nape right when the younger boy deemed himself the luckiest but also the stupidest guy on Earth. 

He’s been dating his high school crush for two weeks without even noticing. Granted, Hyunwoo didn’t know Kihyun didn’t know, so it’s like a circle of misunderstandings. Kihyun wondered if Hoseok knew about the situation, he’s Hyunwoo’s best friend, after all, he wouldn’t not tell him. Suddenly, the cold feeling of dread washed over him once more. 

“Hyung, does Minhyuk know about this?” Hyunwoo stiffened. His silence was a clear answer. 

“For the record, I didn’t tell him. He found out on his own.” Kihyun groaned into his hoodie. That only made Hyunwoo hug him closer. “Though, I did ask him for advice on how to get you to calm down when you’re jittery. Physical affection worked the best.” 

Kihyun groaned louder. Minhyuk knew he had a boyfriend before Kihyun himself knew and he held it over his head for weeks. It made sense as to why he always asked about Hyunwoo at every chance he had. Kihyun thought it was just his friend being his annoying self, him trying to fight boredom, though now it’s obvious he was keeping the biggest secret Kihyun has ever known. 

Nevermind his dislike list, Minhyuk is now ranked number one on Kihyun’s new hit-list. 

Hyunwoo proceeded to hold him while softly stroking his hair. When Kihyun glanced at him he had to stifle his giggles at his crooked hat and still flushed cheeks. At least the blush isn’t from embarrassment anymore, but more from the fact that he’s holding his newly appointed boyfriend. Kihyun instantly felt his face heat up at the realization too. Giddiness coursed through him, making him want to scream and run down the hallway in happiness. 

The bear in his hand grew heavy like it was full of enjoyment too. The butterflies came back. The violins resumed their song. Everything was the same as before. 

Their relationship didn’t start normally (though extreme confusion is common in most couples, so they have that to account for), however, Kihyun was subconsciously aware of the difference in the atmosphere tonight. 

Kihyun does feel a bit guilty. Hyunwoo was convinced they were a couple while Kihyun was a hot mess, inside and out, trying to sort out his internal struggle of convincing himself everything Hyunwoo’s done is because he's a good friend and trying not to be a complete idiot. Kihyun only sorted out one of those problems. Sadly, he’s still an idiot. He should invest in a red nose and big shoes if he wants to be a clown so badly. 

Hyunwoo cleared his throat after a while. “So, um, after all that, I just wanted to point out that this is technically our third date—”

“We never had a real one to begin with.”

“—and all those typical romance movies the same,” Hyunwoo continued, completely ignoring Kihyun’s comment. “I thought we could end ours the same way too.” 

Kihyun wanted to laugh but Hyunwoo was so endearingly honest he was nodding along before he even heard what it was. Kihyun pulled back enough so he could meet Hyunwoo’s intense gaze. The hand on the back of his head moved to cup his face and gently caressed his cheeks. That sense of deja vu returned, taking Kihyun back to the cafeteria and back to his second most humiliating blunder of the week. 

He knew where this was going, the increased volume of the violins was a self-explanatory indication, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t nervous. His own hands clutched Hyunwoo’s hoodie, using the older boy as an anchor to ground himself. When their foreheads met, breaths ghosting over each other’s mouths, Kihyun shuddered. 

“I promise I won’t headbutt you this time,” he says, breathlessly, heart leaping at the strong scent of vanilla. 

Hyunwoo’s lips brushed his when he chuckled. “I’d appreciate it.” 

They pressed forward and met in the middle. The bear fell from his grasp. The violins finally met their long-awaited crescendo. 

Kissing Hyunwoo was like a dance. The way he tenderly moved his lips against Kihyun’s was entrancing, sweeping him off his feet and spinning him until he was dizzy. He felt his body melt against him, completely boneless and compliant to his touch. The hand that wasn’t on his face moved to cup his nape, tilting Kihyun’s head up at the right angle to shyly swipe his tongue along his bottom lip. Kihyun gasped but before Hyunwoo could pull back to apologize for the sudden movement, his mouth was already open. 

Flames roared in Kihyun’s stomach, white-hot tendrils flared until they consumed his whole being. Hyunwoo’s tongue was just as talented as the rest of him, deepening the kiss for both of them to sigh into each other’s mouths. Kihyun never tried drugs but he’s more than sure he’s addicted to Hyunwoo’s lips. His hands roamed Hyunwoo’s chest, up to his neck until his finger’s found home in the brunette’s hair. His hat was knocked off and fell somewhere to the side, next to the forgotten Beanie Baby. 

Only when Kihyun’s lungs begged for air did they separate, but that didn’t stop Hyunwoo from littering the younger’s face in sloppy kisses. They remained tangled together, catching their breaths in the empty hallway. 

“I’ve waited two weeks to do that,” Hyunwoo admitted. 

Kihyun hummed. “Better than expected?” 

Way better,” Hyunwoo confirmed. They giggled, both high off whatever spell they’re under before Hyunwoo pecked him once time and pulled away. He bent down to pick up his hat and the bear. “Are you sure you still want this? It is kinda ugly.”

“I think he’s cute.” Kihyun snatched his gift away and hugged it to his chest. “He reminds me of you.”

“Are you saying I’m ugly?” 

When Kihyun playfully didn’t answer, Hyunwoo lunged and caged him between his arms once more. They stumbled with their laughter echoing down the hall until Kihyun’s back thumped against his front door. 

“Do you want to come inside? It’s not that late, I can make hot cocoa and we can cuddle.” Hyunwoo raised his eyebrow which in turn made Kihyun slap his arm. “We can just cuddle.” 

“Are you sure? I don’t want to bother Changkyun.”

“Are you kidding? He’s probably looking at us through the peephole right now.” Kihyun kicked the door and not even a second later the lock unlatched. 

“Correction,” Changkyun said when the couple entered the threshold, “Minhyuk-hyung was looking through the peephole, the rest of us were listening through the walls.”   

Kihyun wants to be mad but knowing his friends witnessed the whole thing is better than retelling his biggest embarrassment to date. However, that didn’t stop him from pointing at Minhyuk and giving him a menacing glare. 

“We’ll talk later,” Kihyun promised. Minhyuk only shrugged. He probably knew his demise was near so he accepted his fate a long time ago. 

Kihyun led Hyunwoo through the hallway and into the living room. Jooheon, Hoseok, and Hyungwon were sprawled over the couch watching an old Disney movie. They pretended to focus on two dogs eating spaghetti but Hyungwon’s shifty eyes were a dead giveaway.

Jooheon greeted them first. “Hey, hyungs! How was your—”

Kihyun tugged his ear as they passed by. “Kyun already ratted you out.” 

“Snitch,” Jooheon mumbled as Changkyun returned to his spot on his lap. 

“You guys wanna watch with us?” Hoseok asked. 

Minhyuk came up behind them and threw both arms around his friends. “We have chips. And the candy you like.” His smile was infectious while his eyes shined with mirth. When they say ‘watch with us’ they actually mean bombarding the pair with questions about their night. 

Kihyun knew he’d have to tell them eventually, but that can wait. “No thanks. We’re going to sleep.” 

Hyunwoo frowned. “But I wanted co—” Kihyun squeezed his hand in warning. It took a second until he got the hint. “Yeah, sleep. We’re going to sleep.”

As they walked farther into the house, their friend’s snickers amplified. 

“Remember the wallet!” Changkyun called after them. “You’ll thank me later!”

Only when Kihyun slammed his bedroom door shut could he finally breathe easily. He scrubbed his face with his hands and sighed. Hyunwoo chortled at him.

“Do I want to know about the wallet?”

“No. Definitely not.”

Hyunwoo nodded in understanding and began helping Kihyun out of his jacket. They worked in comfortable silence, Kihyun went to turn on his desk lamp and threw his belongings near a stack of books while Hyunwoo removed his hoodie, draping both articles of clothing on a nearby chair. Kihyun was reluctant to open his closet, it probably still looked like a mess with jeans slewn in baskets and shirts haphazardly hung up. He’ll save that mess for tomorrow. 

Kihyun placed his bear right on the bed and stood back to admire the new addition to his plushies. A pair of strong arms wrapped around his waist and pulled him close. Hyunwoo swayed from side to side, making Kihyun relax into his embrace. 

“I still want hot chocolate,” he said. “Make some in the morning?”

Kihyun grinned and turned in his hold. “Only if you promise to help me with breakfast.” 

“Deal.” Hyunwoo mirrored his smile. He mapped out Kihyun’s face with his eyes, indulging in their alone time. Both of them knew it’ll only last till morning so they’ll take as many stolen moments as they can get. “Are we really going to sleep?”

“Did you have anything else in mind?” Kihyun prayed his face stayed expressionless though the heat creeping up his neck was unfortunately noticeable. 

“Not anything I’d like to do with a room full of eavesdroppers right next to us.” Kihyun snorted. He had a point, but they can test those waters another time. “We can still cuddle. Maybe make out some more.” 

Kihyun might be an indecisive train wreck, but he knew when to make a decision quickly and he chose the latter without even giving it a second thought. They staggered until the back of Hyunwoo’s legs hit the bed then Kihyun pounced. He’s been waiting two years to be able to do this so his enthusiasm is unmatched.

Their lips connected in a way that left him breathless. They alternated between fiery and gentle, starving for each other’s touch and taking their time to memorize the other’s mouth. When Kihyun needed air more than his boyfriend’s lips, he’d rest his head in the junction of his shoulder and neck. 

Hyunwoo traced mindless patterns on Kihyun’s exposed skin where his shirt rode up. His breathing evened out but Kihyun could still feel his rapidly beating heart beneath his fingertips. He nuzzled closer into the warmth and relished in the soft peck at his hairline. 

“I’ve dreamt of this, y’know.” 

“Of what?”

“You. Of us. I had a feeling you liked me back in high school but never thought more of it. You were always focused on your studies so I didn’t want to distract you.” Hyunwoo’s eyes glazed over. “That first year was weird. Not seeing you every day sucked so I think that’s when I started to like you. I guess absence does make the heart grow fonder, huh?” 

Kihyun agreed. If he had a cent for every time his heart ached from being away from Hyunwoo for so long, then he wouldn’t need a roommate to help pay the bills. 

“Do you remember the first day of your freshman year here?” Kihyun nodded. “Do you remember when I ran towards you?”

“Of course,” Kihyun giggled. “You almost trampled two students and jumped over a wagon.” 

Hyunwoo tickled his boyfriend’s side, making him squirm. “I was excited, sue me. Anyways, I guess that was the moment I realized I was gone for you. Just seeing you in front of me put me at ease. I was so happy. Then, God Ki, when you looked at me, I swear…”

He trailed off. Kihyun furrowed his brows then propped himself up on his arms. “Swear what?” 

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.” 

“Try me.”

Hyunwoo rolled over so he faced the younger. Their eyes met and Kihyun knew exactly what he was going to say. 

“When you looked at me, I swear I heard violins.” 

Kihyun smiled at him. He always thought his violins were sources of his imagination. Though now that he knows he’s not the only one who heard them, Kihyun is more than sure Hyunwoo is the man for him. Great minds think alike, they say. Or, in their case, a musical instrument plays whenever they have a Moment.  

“Crazy, right?” Hyunwoo chuckled.

“No, I understand.” Kihyun shifted so they were a hair length away. Their noses touched when he spoke. “I heard them too. I still do, actually. Whenever I’m around you or thinking of you, I hear them.” 

Hyunwoo gave him a butterfly kiss. “Huh, then I guess we’re both crazy.” 

“Of course we are. Life would be boring if we weren’t.”

They laughed and savored each other’s touch and voice. Hyunwoo kept staring at him before he connected their lips again. The chords of a familiar tune commenced when Kihyun crawled atop the elder and kissed him like his life depended on it. Vanilla invaded his senses, fire coursed down his spine, the violins were as loud as ever. 

As they lost themselves in each other, Kihyun rearranged his love list so that Hyunwoo’s kisses were ranked first. He debated if Hyunwoo himself should be the top spot, but he was already in Kihyun’s heart, held high amongst all his favorite things. 

When Kihyun pulled back to admire the boy below him, he felt a twinge in his chest. His heart played to the beat of the instruments, following Hyunwoo’s symphony earnestly. 

Before, Kihyun didn’t know if he liked or disliked the violins, it was ranked somewhere in between both lists. Though now, when Hyunwoo looks at him like he’s the brightest star in the universe, Kihyun welcomes the music with open arms. 

Notes:

I'd just like to point out that those ice cream flavors really are kihyun's favorite, he said so himself, and knowing he likes mint chip makes me very happy. thank you guys for reading, pls don't hesitate to comment and let me know what you thought. kudos are also welcomed :)