You stared at the sparkling water that reflected the sun rays of the rising sun as the ocean breeze blew through your thin skirted wide-leg trousers. You closed your shawl wrap cardigan over your chest and crossed your arms to try to fight off the cold morning dew. You regretted wearing such thin clothing this early in the mourning, knowing full well that it was nearing fall here in Greece. But you needed the fresh air to clear your head, and you picked up the first thing you saw on the floor.
There you stood, on the creaky porch of your shared cabin just up the hill from the rest of the city on this incredibly small island. It hasn’t been the smallest island you’ve been to so far, but it was the most beautiful. This whole trip has been beautiful.
It’s just been one big wonderful, gorgeous, amazing experience. The places you’ve visited, all the people you’ve met, and the sites you’ve seen. You knew that if you had to do it all over again you wouldn’t change a thing.
You’d change one thing.
You woke in the early hours of the morning with a queasy feeling in your stomach and bile creeping up your throat. You rushed to the bathroom in a frenzy and spent at least five minutes emptying your stomach of whatever you didn’t digest of last night’s dinner and another five dry heaving.
As you leaned back against the wall you were immediately sent into a panic. You knew you couldn’t have gotten food poisoning because you ate the same thing you had the first night you came here and you were fine. You weren’t allergic to anything that was on the island, and there was no way you had the flu. You would have at least had a fever before you started throwing up if you did. Come to think of it, you were pretty positive your period was late.
Which means the vomit sitting in that toilet two feet away from you could only leave one other option.
You took in a deep breath and shifted your weight to your right foot. You heard the creaky old porch squeak under you and exhaled as you continued to stare longingly at the ocean water.
Oh how incredibly gorgeous it is.
And how incredibly devastating it is that you’ll have to cut your wondrous trip short. Or at least put it on hold until you can figure out what the hell you’re going to do.
You had no idea how you were even going to begin to explain this to your parents. You didn’t even tell them that you dropped out of law school to travel the world with some random boy you met in a coffee shop.
How messed up is that conversation gonna be? Considering that’s what your parents wanted you to do. To anyone who’s known you, it was no surprise to them that you dropped everything you’ve worked so hard for, that your parents wanted for you, to live your dreams.
They all knew you wanted to do more than sit in some stuffy office for the rest of your life. Even if you were, you at least wanted to make some memories before you decided to settle for that lifestyle. But you were scared. Something was holding you back.
And there you were, a brand new sophomore in law school, and you were already swamped with work. But you expected nothing less from the top college with the best law program.
But then he came.
You remembered when he asked you to come with him like it was yesterday. And you remembered exactly what he said to you that day.
“Life is short, the world is wide- and I wanna make some memories,” he said with the biggest shine in his angel eyes that you couldn’t possibly say no. “I want to go places everyone and no one's been before. And...I wanna do it with you...If you say yes,”
You only knew him for a few weeks, but you knew. You knew right then that you needed to take a chance for once. He was your chance. And you were his muse. Whether it was a love that was going to last forever or a love that lasted months, you didn’t care. And you are so glad that you didn’t because it has been the best six months of your life.
You blinked as a tear fell from your eye.
You were beyond scared.
You felt as if you were handed the world and now your world feels like it’s crumbling and slipping right through your fingers.
You rested a hand on your stomach as you wiped your tears with your sleeve. You were just about to head inside when Lance flung open the cabin door in a slight panic until his eyes fell on you.
“Oh Y/n, I was looking for you. What are you doing out here?” he asked, slightly breathy. Probably from frantically searching for you. You sniffled a little and hugged yourself to try to conceal yourself from the slight cold.
“I just needed some fresh air,”
“Are you okay? You look like you’ve been crying,” Lance said and stepped closer to you.
“Yeah, I'm fine. We should go inside, it’s cold out here and you don’t have a shirt on,”
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Lance asked again once you were both inside. Instead of answering you hugged him and buried your face in his chest. In response, he wrapped his arms around your shoulders and rested his cheek on the top of your head.
You were scared for sure, but you were mostly scared that Lance was going to leave you. You didn’t need him per se, but you were kind of, sort of, maybe just a little bit...in love with him. And it would be nice if he stayed to help you with this situation. You were in a foreign country for christ's sake. If you told him and he wanted to break up with you, he’d either take you back to the united states and continue his travels or leave you in Greece. You doubt the last one was an option considering how generous Lance is, but the former...It would leave you in a very awkward situation.
Plus, there are no hospitals here that can perform a safe abortion, and you’re pretty positive by the time you both can get enough money to go to your next destination you won’t be able to safely travel until your second trimester. And by then it’s illegal to get an abortion. Or at least in America, it is, you’re not exactly sure what the rules are in certain countries.
You and Lance swayed in the living room for what felt like hours, even though it was only a few minutes. But it was enough time to settle your nerves just the tiniest bit. Now was the time to tell him, you weren’t going to get any less nervous than this so...
“I’m pregnant.” You both stopped swaying. And your heartbeat sped up by a million miles a minute as it pounded so hard in your chest. If Lance couldn’t feel it then he could hear it from how quiet it was throughout the whole cabin. It even felt like the breeze stopped whipping in the wind and waves stopped crashing against the shore.
“What?” Lance whispered so quietly, you probably wouldn’t have heard him if the world hadn’t stopped making noise. You pulled away from his embrace as you never looked up from the ground. You could feel his warm blue stare as you fidgeted with the tassels hanging from your cardigan shawl sleeves.
“I-I’m..pregnant,” you whispered again.
“What?” Lance repeated dumbly.
“God, don’t make me say it again,” you mumbled and stiffly walked over to the couch in the middle of the room and sat with your back paper board straight. You were too nervous to sit comfortably. You were too nervous to look behind you, where you knew Lance was standing. “I understand if..” you paused to try to hold back tears. You didn’t want to put this out there, but you had to. You breathed in a shaky inhale before you continued. “If you want to break up. If you want to take me back to the US, o-or even leave me here...I’ll understand,”
After waiting a minute for Lance’s response and getting nothing but silence, you made to move to the bedroom to give him a minute maybe, or start packing if that’s what it comes down to. You don’t know, but you just feel the need to give him some time to collect himself or something. Lance stops you before you get to the door. He grabbed you by your forearm and swiftly spun you around, causing you to bump into his chest and almost falling to the ground before he catches you and holds you close by your waist.
“I don’t wanna break up,” He whispers sweetly into your ear. “I may be acting a bit rash, but I want to be with you Y/n. Whether that be with child or without, I will be there for you in any way you want me to be. I don’t know what we’re gonna do yet, but I know I want to figure it out together,” he speaks with so much confidence and not a single waver in his voice.
At his heartfelt words, you immediately start crying. It’s not an ugly sob, but a few sniffles here and there. It’s the rush of the relief and tension leaving your body as you cry into Lance’s shoulder and hug him so tightly and hold him so close, you both might as well be one person.
And it’s the feeling of euphoria that has it accidentally slipping from your mouth because let’s be honest with ourselves here, you know you were thinking it:
“I love you.” Another bomb. Another bomb that slipped through the storm of tears. And if Lance asks that’s what you’ll say. But he doesn’t ask. In fact…
“I love you too. So much.”
And you two kiss.
And this kiss is so lovingly and earth-shatteringly beautiful, you’re surprised the world is still intact. Because you definitely aren’t. You melted in the pre-autumn Greece morning dew and in your lover's arms.
You don’t know what you’re going to do. But you’ll be damned if you’re not going to love every second of it.