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Conan Edogawa and The Philosopher's Stone

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Kudo Shinichi - no, wait - Edogawa Conan stared up in shock, mouth agape while large, blue eyes tried to comprehend what the hell was going on. Conan Edogawa is a boy who strictly follows the laws of logic. He knows that magic and things like ghosts and monsters aren't real. He knows that wizard spells and potions don’t exist.

So why the hell is everything floating around him?


It was just a normal day for the shrunken teen. He walked to school with the Shounen Tantei-dan, did the classwork and finished homework assignments as he got them, followed the kids around with Haibara and made sure they didn’t run into a hostage situation again, and then went back to the Mouri Detective Agency around the evening to have dinner with Ran and Kogoro-jisan.

Well, he would’ve if his parents didn’t kidnap him off the street on the way. He’s pretty sure Haibara’s heart died, was brought back to life, and then dunked in ice cold water twice when the black van just swept him off of the sidewalk and into the vehicle.

Conan should’ve expected it though, seeing as it wasn’t the first time and probably was suspicious they didn’t do it any sooner.

(“Oba-chan, Otousan, can’t you just pick me up like normal parents?”

(“Oh but that wouldn’t be any fun Shin-chan~! And what was that, brat?!”


So that led to his parents dragging him onto a 12 hour flight to Britain and getting his ear chewed off by Haibara and Ran. At least they couldn’t call him again from half-way across the world..

(“Oo~ Shin-chan, Yuu-kun! Look, look, that girl was watching one of my movies!”

(“Honey, I love you very much and your acting is superb, but could you please focus on the suspects and not the victim’s obvious obsession with your movies and shows?”)

They dropped off their luggage at the hotel they were staying at - the detours were absolutely horrific, but he silently thanked whatever God out there his mother wasn’t the one driving - and they were just settling in. His mother was on the phone with her friends, lounging on one of the beds as she chirped into her phone, twirling her hair like a teenager discussing her crush at school. His father sat at the oak desk, the lamp turned on and facing towards his papers while he stared blankly down at the empty pages, tapping his pen while he tried to find inspiration in his own little world. The poor man looked one minute away from banging his head against the wooden surface.

Conan sighed, his attention turned back towards the Holmes book-- “The Memoirs of Sherlock Holmes”; he already read “A Study in Scarlet” enough times to recite the entire thing-- in his hands. He was comfortably sitting upon the burgundy fabric sofa, legs crossed and glasses hooked on the collar of his shirt.

“Shinichi, can you grab me a cup of coffee please? I’m having some trouble with this last chapter.” Yusaku hummed, not bothering to look over at him as he furiously rubbed at his eyes.

“Oh, Yuu-kun, just say you can’t think!” Yukiko giggled, flopping onto her stomach, legs swinging in the air.

Conan only chuckled, exasperated. He gently dog-eared the page and hopped onto his feet. His nose unconsciously scrunched up in disgust, the feeling of the hotel’s carpet felt weird against his sock-covered feet. It wasn’t the first time he didn’t wear indoor slippers, he’s been to European countries before, but it still felt unnervingly strange. He quickly shoved his thoughts aside and quietly continued on his way, padding over to the connected kitchen.

Ok, so that he still wasn’t fully used to.

His small hands reached up to the half-filled coffee pot-- made earlier to stop Conan from snapping at them every two minutes. Almost immediately after his fingers touched the handle, his mother burst out into a loud scream.

Reacting on instincts alone, Conan whipped around to assess the situation-

Except he couldn’t exactly...comprehend the sight that greeted him.

Conan stared at his floating parents apathetically, their equally shocked faces staring back. He was faintly aware of his father’s papers scattered across in the air, pillows joining in the uncoordinated-- mocking-- dance.

Deep breath in. Deep breath out.

“Y-yuu-kun, Shin-chan, what’s going on?!” Yukiko yelped, flailing her arms and making a grab for the bed’s headboard, or the lamp. Conan couldn’t tell really since her efforts seemed to make her float further away into the air. If his mother was in shock though, his father was absolutely speechless. Yusaku’s mouth opened and closed like a fish, but nothing came out of his mouth. His eyes were wide, gawking at something yet at absolutely nothing. Conan would’ve laughed at his father’s voiceless confusion if it weren’t for the current situation at hand.

“Mom, what did you do?” Conan hissed. Although he highly doubted his mother had anything to do with the sudden phenomenon. He ignored her indignant squawk of denial and tried to focus on seeing through the trick.

Yes. Trick.

Because no way in hell were his parents and their stuff actually floating. Laws of logic said that it would be impossible. So that led him to touching everything and investigating, attempting to find a logical reason for this insanity.

That then led to everything else he touched joining his parents, the pillows, and the blank pieces of paper in the air. Which finally led him back into the present, standing in the middle of the room while blankly staring at the now crowded ceiling. In his slightly dazed state, he barely registered his father yelling at him from beneath the white mattress to stop touching things.

Conan just felt numb because this, this was absolutely not possible. Things don’t just suddenly float everytime you touch something. Except it just happened. He knew he probably looked ridiculous. His eyes were the size of saucers, eyebrows furrowed while his mouth formed a small ‘o’. At least he wasn’t openly screaming like his mother was.

The sound of a near-silent ‘pop’ from behind him made Conan stagger forwards, whirling around to face whatever had decided to explode instead of float this time. He let out a yell when rather finding an exploded lamp or something, he came face to face with two men. Complete opposites of each other, Conan instantly noticed.

The man in front of him was tall, lanky, and had a clean shaven face while his partner behind him was short,-- taller than the average Japanese male though-- was quite chubby, and had stubble all over his lower face. Both were dressed in strange, black robes and were clearly gaping down at Conan with unrestrained shock.

Wait- hold up, where the hell did these people come from?

“U-um...hello?” Conan stuttered out awkwardly in English, as if his parents and everything that wasn’t bolted to the floor weren’t currently stranded stuck to the ceiling.

The taller one snapped out of his stupor first-- albeit still giving Conan astonished glances-- and stepped up beside Conan, reaching into his robe and pulling out a-- stick…?

Conan couldn’t help the intensely confused look he directed towards him.

“Obcido!” the man yelled, ignoring the child’s unimpressed glare and continued with the spell, raising his arm to finish the its motions.

As if a switch was flicked, the couch slowly descended back onto the ground along with the bed, desk, and his parents. It was slightly disappointing that the papers and pillows just flopped onto the carpet but Conan could care less, gaping at his also alarmed parents. When Yukiko’s feet were firmly planted onto solid ground, she darted over to Conan and enveloped him in her arms, fussing over him despite the fact that she was the one who was laying on the ceiling for half an hour.

Yusaku blinked, leaning against the wooden chair by his desk to balance himself. His legs were trembling as he muttered under his breath rapidly, his eyebrows furrowed quizzically.

The shorter man cleared his throat and the confused family startled, remembering the strangers standing in their hotel room and their mood changed faster than the snap of a finger, narrowing their eyes at the two men.

“Good morning, I’m Derek Brooks and this is my partner, Edmund Sidebottom.” he introduced, holding a hand out towards Yukiko. The taller, Edmund, chose to instead eye Conan with an unreadable face, looking him up and down as Conan tried not to fidget under the scrutinizing gaze.

Yukiko plastered on a smile-- obviously fake but they didn't need to know that-- and shook Derek’s hand, albeit with a stronger grip than necessary.

“I would say pleasure to meet you except for the teensy-tiny little fact that you’re strangers who have broken into our room without explanation. Along with the fact that Yuu-kun and I were floating for who knows how long in the air.” she said bubbly, adding on a tiny little giggle at the end.

It was uncalled for, but then again they were all on edge.

Conan tried to shove away the small flicker of satisfaction upon seeing Edmund and Derek stiffen up, their eyes darted towards each other warily but said nothing at his mother’s passive aggressiveness.

Derek once again cleared his throat-- probably to pretend as if he regained some control back-- and continued, “We are from the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes and only came to fix it. We also have orders to give you a warning about the use of underage magic and advise you not to do it again.”

His gray eyes, large and worried, were aimed at Yukiko as he wringed his short fingers together, the too small glasses perched on his nose sliding down the bridge a bit but was hurriedly pushed back up. Conan observed the nervous way the man carried himself, yet was still somehow put together. He blatantly tried not to look Edmund's direction though, feeling his unnerving gaze fixated on his tiny form. In all honesty, it was starting to scare and piss him off.


Did he just say magic?

On a lighter note, his mother seemed pleasantly delighted that Derek thought she was young enough to pass off as underaged. Wait, he was straying off topic again.

“What do you mean ‘magical accidents’ and ‘underage magic’? I’m sorry, if this is supposed to be a prank, frankly, it isn’t very funny.”

For the first time in a while, Conan found himself respecting his father again.

The two men simultaneously blinked. Their eyes once again met the others as they had a silent conversation with each other. Conan almost snorted at how obvious the two were as their eyes darted from his mother, to him, and then to his father in a repeated, annoying, loop. The feeling of something tugging at his arm had Conan’s attention snapping towards his mother’s pale limb and her concerned expression, carefully hidden by that expertly crafted poker face.

Conan wanted to yank his arm away and tell her that he could take care of himself-- but seeing the pleading look in her eyes made him sigh. He allowed her to pull him into a hug, feeling his cheeks warm as she picked him up like a child-- well, he currently was but that’s not the point. Conan suppressed a drawn out groan, deciding to instead bury his face into her shoulder and hide from the world.

“This isn’t exactly our area of, er, expertise.. Dealing with muggles, that is.” Derek said, his voice slow as if he himself were still comprehending the words.

Deciding he had enough of his timid partner’s hesitation, Edmund sighed and spoke above him.

“Please wait patiently while we contact the Ministry about your...situation.”

“What in the world are you talking about? You can give up the joke now, or do you really expect us to believe the excuse that ‘magic exists’ because I know for a fact that it doesn’t! And what are ‘muggles’?!” Yusaku interjected, his usually calm voice tinted with an underlying frustration that Conan had never heard from his father.

Except for that one time KID decided to prank their home on April Fool’s day when he was actually seven but that’s neither here nor now..

Abruptly, Derek disappeared with a soft ‘pop’. Conan would’ve started on a questioning spree, interrogating his partner for logical answers.

But he was just so done with all this bullshit.

“What I don’t understand is how we detected underage magic? We gave you the benefit of doubt by assuming you, young madam, were at least seventeen. And your child doesn’t appear to be anything near eleven years old!” Edmund wondered, two fingers rested beneath his chin.

“Oh, but he is eleven!”


Conan blankly stared at his mother. She returned it with a wink, her lips quirking up into a smile.

Well, it was probably better that way, Conan realized. It wasn’t like he could tell them “Oh in reality, I’m a seventeen year old teen but got shrunk into a seven year old boy.”

Actually, that sounded more plausible than fucking magic.

Edmund squinted, giving him a once over. “But he’s so...small! Are you absolutely sure?”

“Of course we are! Isn’t that right, Yuu-kun~?” Yukiko looked to Yusaku, her face angled carefully so that Edmund couldn’t see her pleading expression, wordlessly asking him to play along.

Yusaku caught Conan’s eye, both unsure how they wanted to proceed with...whatever the hell this was. Finally, he let out a strangled sigh, rubbing his temple furiously.

“Yes, Conan is just unusually small for his age.”

That one really wasn’t a lie. Whatever God out there just really hates him. Like, it’s ok to drop dead bodies on top of him on an almost daily basis, shrink him into a child, and then decide to almost kill him on more than one occasion (and that was just last year), but they didn’t bother at least making Conan’s height somewhat average for a first grader?

Edmund nodded slowly, still eyeing Conan but seemed to buy the excuse. His mother tightened her grip on him while his father moved in closer, putting a hand on her shoulder. It seemed like Conan wasn’t the only one to notice Edmund’s borderline-creepy staring.

It wasn’t long until the room was filled with a series of ‘pops’ and on reflex alone, Conan flicked up his watch and aimed it towards the source--

There stood a tall, old man. His beard long and white like a stream of silver and half-moon spectacles sat on his crooked nose, face wrinkled with age and wisdom. Derek popped out from behind the mystery elder, giving them a shy wave.

“Dumbledore-!” Edmund startled. Conan noted the respect in his eyes as he realized who the new presence was. Must be someone important if he was able to get him to stop eyeing Conan.

“Oh please, don’t mind me. I was just stopping by the Ministry when I overheard Mr. Brooks' conversation and decided to come along.” Dumbledore hummed, a strange twinkle in his eyes as his gaze landed on the small child, almost completely covered by his mother’s arms.

Shaking himself out of his temporary daze, Edmund cleared his throat, “Anyways, Mr. and Mrs…?”

“Kudou,” Yusaku answered, dragging it out as he peered at the three men with crossed arms and narrowed eyes, “Yusaku Kudou, and this is my wife Yukiko Kudou.”

“And I’m Conan Edogawa!”, he smiled childishly, albeit strained.

“You two aren’t his parents?” Derek commented, sharing a look with his partner.

Conan silently wondered if they were more than coworkers but didn’t bother to point it out. Maybe later if Edmund continued annoying him with that uncomfortable staring.

“Nope! Conan-kun is my distant nephew! His parents are currently too busy to visit the poor child~.” Yukiko chirped, snuggling Conan firmly against her, earning a protesting whine from him.

“Well, um, Mrs. and Mr. Kudou, have you noticed anything...strange with Conan?” Edmund said.

Yukiko nodded rapidly, curls bouncing up and down as she smushed her cheek against Conan’s. “Oh of course! He always manages to get himself into serious danger nowadays! Yuu-kun, remember that time he got thrown out of a blimp and didn’t even bother telling us? Mou, Conan-kun, we had to hear it from Ran-chan!”

The Kudou family ignored the way the self-proclaimed wizards shot the boy a bewildered look. Thankfully- for Conan- they didn’t comment. He really didn’t want to explain how and why he was thrown off a blimp.

“Um, anything besides that?”

It was Yusaku’s turn to think, rubbing his chin as he thought deeply. “Now that I think about it, people seem to die around you quite a lot, don’t they Conan?”

“Oi oi, don’t phrase it like that!” Conan snapped, his eyebrow twitched.

If they weren’t speechless before, they were now. Edmund and Derek openly gaped at Conan and his parents- Derek in terror while Edmund was unreadable. Dumbledore had a small smile on his wizened face, standing behind the two men with a relaxed posture. Conan almost thought he looked amused.

“Well, to put this simply, it’s more than likely that young Mr. Edogawa is a- er, a wizard.” Derek explained, his voice was shaky despite the confident front he put up.

“Yes that much was gathered.” Yusaku deadpanned, “What we want is concrete evidence to your claims.”

Dumbledore’s mouth stretched up into a playful grin and he reached into his long robe’s sleeve, pulling out a stick, like Edmund’s. Now that he thought about it, they were probably going to claim that those sticks were wands, weren’t they?

The old man’s eyes seemed to laugh, watching Conan and Yusaku with evident mirth. For some reason, it didn’t annoy Conan as much as it usually would’ve.

He raised the polished wood into the air and moved it in a sideways figure eight. A soft, blue light emerged from the tip of the wand, circling a fallen pen on the carpet floor. Conan observed in astonishment as the pen began to morph into a small, white bird. It shouldn’t be possible, but there was solid proof right there.

Jumping out of his mother’s arms, he scrambled towards the tiny creature, frantically trying to see if it were just a trick. Maybe misdirection? An illusion?

But he couldn’t see anything. He saw the pen turn into a bird, right in front of his eyes. Conan faintly acknowledged the bird’s insistent pecking against his knuckles, preferring to turn around and searched his parents’ faces for an explanation. Their reactions were as good as his, though, his mother shook a finger at the pen-turned-bird while gripping onto Yusaku. Taking off his glasses, Yusaku closed his eyes. Conan could vaguely make out his chest breathing in deeply and letting out slow breaths.

“Do you believe us now?” Edmund’s toneless voice broke their flabbergasted silence.

Yusaku nodded sluggishly, dropping onto the edge of the bed, shoulders slumped in mild defeat with his hands clasped loosely together, hanging limply in between his legs. His mother seemed to be more composed, although Conan bet it was probably just her years of a practiced mask sliding into place.

Derek knelt down to Conan’s level and tried offering him a kind smile- it just reminded him of his puny height.

“Conan, do you know what a wizard and witch is?”

“Uh huh, a power or influence seemingly from a supernatural source.” Conan explained flatly.

Noting the blank gazes, Conan put on an innocent grin, nervously scratching the back of his head. “That’s what daddy told me!”

“Well, yes that’s….somewhat correct”, Derek continued, apprehensive as he fixated a worried eye on Conan, “Magic is an essential part of a witch and wizard. It allows them to cast spells, brew potions, and see things that muggles can’t.”

“What are...muggles?” Yusaku piped in, shock for the most part dissolved.

“Muggles are what we refer to as non-magical people.” Edmund checked his pocket watch, face scrunching up as he looked at it.

“So, um, long story short, the wizarding world is a hidden society where we wizards and witches live in, separate from muggles. The magical community is able to be kept secret because of charms, spells, and secrecy. It is forbidden to reveal anything about magic to muggle society due to the International Statute of Wizarding Secrecy. Each country…”

Conan’s attention drifted, only catching onto information here and there. He got the basics of it though, like how magic is a constant in the wizarding world to the point where it’s used for basic chores. There was a magical government in every country to oversee magical affairs and telling anyone non-magical about the hidden community was absolutely banned.

“-onan-kun? Conan-kun, what do you think?”

His mother’s voice snapped him out of his haze and he flashed his parents a curious peek.

“Oh, uh, sorry I wasn’t listening. What was that?” he asked, voice feeling thick in his throat.

A beard of silver appeared in front of him and Conan blinked. His attention turned to Dumbledore as the old man held out an envelope to him. Its cover was worn with age and was closed shut with a red wax seal engraved with what he assumed to be the school’s emblem. Darting a confused glance up at Dumbledore, Conan carefully opened the envelope, pulling out an equally old piece of parchment.


Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore
(Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock,
Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards)

Dear Mr. Conan Edogawa ,
We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.
Term begins on 1 September.
Yours sincerely,

Minerva McGonagall
Deputy Headmistress”

“Wait- I can’t- !” Conan choked out, wide eyes whipping up, “I-I-!”

“I’m sorry, Mr. Edogawa but it really isn’t a choice..” Derek put a hand on his shoulder, trying to comfort the growing panic in the child. It only served to make it worse, jerking out of his touch.

He whirled around, “Oka- Aunt Yukiko, Uncle Yusaku, I can’t stay here! I still have that- thing!”

Both Yukiko and Yusaku held onto each other, biting their lips. Conan felt his heart drop into his stomach at the helpless look in their eyes.

“Don’t they have schools in Japan? Can’t I go there?!” Conan cried frantically, his heart thrumming in his chest, fingers digging into the palm of his hand.

Dumbledore shook his head, pitifully staring down at him. “I’m sorry, but from what I’ve heard your magic is too unstable to be allowed to leave the country right now.”

Thin arms wrapped around Conan’s small frame and he felt his mother’s curls against the back of his neck. He didn’t feel any better, but appreciated that she tried.

"Is it alright if my wife and I have a few words with our nephew." Yusaku sent the three a pleading glimpse, tone solemn and low.

Edmund grimaced, his lips parted, seemingly about to refuse when Dumbledore held a hand out. Clamping his mouth together tightly, he popped out of the room, followed by Derek and then Dumbledore.

"Okaasan, otousan, I can't- ! I still have to take care of the Black Organization and- and Ran- !"


Conan stopped his rambling, peering up at his parents, eyes covered with a thin sheet of hysteric tears. Yukiko's arms tightened comfortably around him as she buried her face into the crook of his neck.

"Shin-chan, we don't want you to stay either, but they're not really giving us much of a choice." Yukiko hummed into his skin. He felt something wet drip into the crevice of his neck and bit his lip.

"I know. I just- what if they strike when I'm gone?" Conan whispered, voice tight and small.

His father knelt down and placed a hand on his shoulder, dragging his eyes away from the floor and into identical blue eyes, somber yet sympathetic.

"I think Haibara-san can take care of herself. She still has Agasa-hakase and Akai-san, or Okiya now, doesn't she? And you do remember that Haibara-san is still older than you?"

Conan chuckled, soft and shaky. Yusaku cracked a small smirk, ruffling his son's hair fondly. He tried to scowl like usual- a breathless laugh escaped instead. He felt his mother's face leave it's hiding place and they were face to face, close enough that he could see traces of her waterproof mascara smudged beneath her eyes.

"Shin-chan, you've grown so much. I'm so sorry for not being there for you when you needed it the most." Yukiko laughed bitterly, watery and cracked.

Conan grinned lopsidedly, straining to maintain a calm smile. "It's okay, 'kaasan."

"This might be for the better, anyways." he murmured, ignoring the confused, wide eyed inquiries.

Slipping his glasses off of his shirt collar, Conan slid them back on his face. Deep down he knew that there was the possibility he could never go back to his old life- to Kudou Shinichi. He grimly beamed up at his parents, pain crinkling around the edges, begging to crack through his false face.

"If magic actually does exist, what stops the possibility that the Black Organization isn't somewhat involved with the wizarding world?"

Conan brushed off the looks of horrified realization, choosing to pull out his phone - the Shinichi phone - and flipped it open. He stared blankly at the lit screen while he punched in his passcode. Ran's last conversation with him glared back at Conan, as if it were making fun of him.

"Shinichi, are you sure you want to do this?" he heard his mother breathe out shakily, her voice trembled with each word. Conan forlornly noticed the use of his actual name and not the nickname he used to dislike so much. "Wouldn't Haibara-san have told you if they were involved with magic?"

Shaking his head, his gaze didn't waver as he continued to vacantly riffle through old text messages. He didn't remember what the messages were though- it didn't matter.

"Haibara wouldn't want to drag us any deeper into what she thinks is her mess. She's just like that." Conan pointed out, not even blinking when all he could hear was his mother's stifled sobs and his fingers mashing against the phone's buttons.

Before his parents could start up another argument, the three wizards appeared once again.

Their time was up.

"Mr. Edogawa?" Edmund raised an expecting eyebrow at him, tilting his head slightly.

Conan read over the acceptance letter again, ignorant to his parents' silent, grudging acceptance. He regarded Edmund with a sharp stare.

"Where do I get my supplies?"