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Darkwing Duck Punches A Clown (And Then Beats it With a Pipe)

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Gosalyn and Honker clutched to their pipes as they huddled in the dark corner of the sewer. The dancing clown, Pennywise if the name on the side of the carnival poster was to be believed, walked ever closer, a floating balloon in his hand. He walked closer, one step at a time with that manic grin.

“Don’t worry, Honker,” Gosalyn said, her hand trembling. She held the pipe up higher. “We got this.”

Pennywise smiled wider, showing off the rows of sharp teeth, sparkling white behind the red paint around his lips.

“I hope we’ve got this,” Gosalyn said. She grimaced and swung the pipe, smacking it hard ton Pennywise’s face. “Got him!”

“Do you?” Pennywise said. He chuckled and grabbed the pipe, flinging it across the room. “Playtime’s over.”

“I never thought I’d miss Quackerjack,” Honker muttered, clinging tight to Gosalyn’s arm.

Pennywise reached out with a long hand, gloved fingers turning to claws. He—

“Don’t you touch her!”

Gosalyn and Honker jumped back as Darkwing Duck dropped between them and Pennywise. His cape flipped in the air as he brandished his gas gun and aimed it straight at Pennywise’s face.

“Suck gas, evil doer!” Darkwing shouted, pulling the trigger.

Pennywise hissed as a gas pulled smacked straight into his nose, bursting into a puff of tear gas. He backed away screaming, covering his eyes.

“Dad!” Gosalyn shouted. She ran and hugged him from the side. Darkwing kept his eyes on the evil clown, but held her close. “How’d you know we were down here? I thought you couldn’t see any of the blood or stuff I showed you!”

“Which is why I told you to wait in your room,” Darkwing said. He huffed and smiled. “I’m dating a sorcerous. When you started talking about stuff like that and hallucinations, I went to see Morgana.”

Pennywise continued to cough in the background. Darkwing fired another gas grenade at him when the gas started to dissipate. He growled and waved at the gas.

“She said she sensed an evil presence in the sewers, so I knew what you were talking about was real,” Darkwing said. “But by the time I went to get you, you had already snuck out to fight him on your own!”

“Sorry, dad,” Gosalyn said. “I thought we could take him.”

“I know, sweetie,” Darkwing said. “But it’s okay now. I’m here, and Morgana’s on her way.”

“Gee, Darkwing,” Honker said, wary of the coughing clown. “How’d you find us?”

“I had to interrogate Liquidator, but he eventually told me where mysterious things have been happening in the sewer,” Darkwing said. He fired another gas shot when Pennywise made a new run for them. “I figured I’d either find you or the clown or both, and well, here we are.”

“But how are we going to stop it?” Honker asked.

“The same way I stop any criminal!” Darkwing Duck said. He turned fast on his heel, punching the approaching Pennywise straight in the side of the nose, smacking him hard into the ground. “We take him down!”

“Here, sir,” Honker said, handing Darkwing his pipe. “I think you can use this better than I can.”

“Why thank you, Honker,” Darkwing said, patting him on the head.

As Pennywise rose to his feet, Darkwing slammed the pole on his head again. And again, until the clown had to hold his arms up to defend against the assault.

“You stay away from my kids!” Darkwing yelled, pulling the pipe back like a bat. He swung it hard enough to knock Pennywise back until he fell into a long pipe behind him. The clown dropped and disappeared into the darkness. Darkwing dropped the pipe, breathing heavily. “Come on, kids. Let’s get out of here.”

“But what if it comes back?” Gosalyn said.

“Then I’ll punch it again,” Darkwing said. He ushered the kids toward the maintenance hatch. “Let’s just get out of here and get Morgana. She’ll know how to stop it for good!”

“Thanks for coming, Dad,” Gosalyn said. She hugged Darkwing and he hugged her back.

“Any time, sweetie.”