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Contradictory

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Ivy Alexandria has a photographic memory. 

She can’t remember anything. 

 

So many days and nights spent with her head full of static and pain and the clicking of cogs. 

A human mind is not supposed to be inside a device, as fascinating as it was. 

Where is her childhood? Why can’t she remember? 

Camila and barely remembered flames took everything from her.

Where was she when that happened? She thought this device would perfect her memory. Camilla said so. 

She cannot help doing the calculations. “There is a 34% chance of- there was a 1/56 chance- the odds are 307:1-” 

How can she know so much, and remember so little?

A human brain is an amazing, delicate, intricate thing, more complicated than lungs or blood or even a heart. Her mind cannot fit inside the gears and wires. 

So she learns. And learns and reads and records and it fills some of the empty spaces but she can still feel it slipping through the cracks like sand in cupped hands. 

 

Lyfrassir Edda is haunted by the insane shifting  rainbow hues of yog-sothoth and the bifrost. 

They are colorblind. 

 

The first colors they ever  saw were in the bifrost. It was so amazing that they had wept. Now, the thought of anything but the black and white world  they were born in fills them with terror. They still see the colors in their nightmares. 

They haven’t seen color when awake since they escaped the yggdrasil system, and they could not be more okay with that. The rainbow in their nightmares when they sleep can wait. A human can live without sleeping for more than one day at a time, after all. 

Time is a hard thing to track when in space, but they spent days with their head in their hands, trying desperately to stay awake as the stars zoomed past. 

They are not going to give in to the rainbow behind their eyes.