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i can do better

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It starts on a Monday.

Hinata has never been too fond of Mondays, but he can't say that's anything abnormal. Class drags by as usual and the his notes fill up with poorly-drawn circles which he meant to be volleyballs (he imagines Kageyama's reaction to them-- “you can't even draw one properly by now?” and disrupts a math lesson with his snorting). It's a normal Monday, focus pinpointed on practice at the end of the day.

When the bell finally rings and Hinata and Kageyama somehow find each other racing to the gym, nothing seems out of the ordinary at all. He loses, but even that is comfortingly familiar and they enter the gym bickering about how many losses it will take for him to finally give up (“you're only three ahead, jackass!”)

Practice, in fact, goes swimmingly; Hinata and Kageyama are both on their game and Sugawara claps Hinata on the shoulder, telling him he's getting better at recieves and have you been training outside of practice again? He has, but it's not like anyone else needs to know that. He glances over at Kageyama, expecting a pointed Look over the extracurricular practicing that he's been roped into, but for once Kageyama isn't paying attention to him in the slightest. Instead, he's bowing a farewell and quickly shuffling off to change.

Now this, Hinata is not expecting. Most days Kageyama stays behind with him to practice more; even though he grumbles about it, Hinata knows he's just as eager to improve. Maybe Kageyama wasn't feeling well? But they'd been so in-sync earlier, that couldn't have been it. Hinata vaguely registers Sugawara finishing up their (decidedly one-sided) conversation and turning away to discuss something with the captain, and takes his chance to bark out a hasty “good work today” and take off after Kageyama.

Kageyama is still in the room, hunched over his bag in the corner and in the process of changing his shirt. He jumps when he hears Hinata enter, whipping his head around. Hinata pouts at the disinterested expression when Kageyama sees it's only him, but gets over it quickly when he notices the redness of Kageyama's face.

“Kageyamaaa,” Hinata starts out, making his way over. “What's up, didn't you want to stay and toss to me today?” Hinata almost doesn't ask because of course Kageyama wants to toss to him. Why wouldn't he? But Hinata humors his friend's strange behavior and when he finally reaches him, claps both his hands on Kageyama's broad shoulders.

Once again, Kageyama visibly jumps. “The hell do you think you're doing, dumbass?” he clips out, smacking one of Hinata's hands off his shoulders.

There's no bite in his statement, so Hinata's hand finds his way back. He's just about to tell Kageyama exactly what he is doing (“trying to coerce you into tossing to me, what else?” when he hears voices approaching and the door opens, the rest of the team filtering in. After a brief glance, Hinata turns back to Kageyama to say something, maybe about today's practice or getting meat buns afterwards since today is Kageyama's turn to pay, but he stops short when he notices Kageyama's shoulders hunching almost imperceptibly under his hands. Was Kageyama actually feeling sick?

Leaning down, Hinata tries speaking in his best whisper, which doesn't really differ much from his normal speaking voice, but everyone is noisy enough that it doesn't really matter. “Are you feeling sick or something?”

Everyone would agree that Hinata isn't the most perceptive kid, but even he notices the hitch in Kageyama's breathing. Hinata frowns. Being sick could seriously hinder his and Kageyama's practice together, and Kageyama was definitely the type of person to deny it until he was on the verge of dying. After entertaining the brief thought of having to nurse Kageyama back to health on his death bed, Hinata tighten his grip on Kageyama's shoulders.

“Should I tell the captain you're not feeling well?” He hopes Kageyama notes the definitely genuine concern for his well-being and not just their volleyball sessions. He amps up the pleading tone in his voice. “You can't play if you're sick!”

At that, Kageyama whips his head around to glare up at Hinata. “I'm not sick!” He glances around to make sure nobody took notice of his outburst; thankfully they're all busy listening to Nishinoya and Tanaka recount some television series they've been into of late.

“Look, I'm seriously not sick. Just shut up and leave me alone and we can practice later.” Kageyama's voice is gruff, but Hinata can tell he's also trying to be reassuring, maybe? He thinks that's the case. Maybe he's giving Kageyama's growth a little too much development, but Hinata likes to think the best of people before he thinks the worst, and sometimes he's even feeling generous enough to extend that to Kageyama, especially at the mention of extra practice later. Kageyama will probably treat him to food if they play well enough, and Hinata's feeling confident enough in his abilities today to nod firmly and bound away to get changed.

Or he was, anyway. When ten minutes pass and the rest of the club members are filtering out, Hinata watches as Kageyama still sits crouched over his bag, shuffling around in it like he's pretending to be looking for something really important. True, Hinata had been changed in about two minutes, but lingering concern for Kageyama (maybe) and the expectation of practicing with him have made him stall for time until the two of them are the last in the club room. Daichi's told them he'll wait outside to lock up, so hurry up and finish whatever the heck is taking you so long, Kageyama. At this Kageyama does blush, nodding quickly. Hinata watches.

He keeps watching as Kageyama awkwardly stands up and shuffles out of his shorts and into his school pants. The thought that it might be a little weird and invasive doesn't even cross Hinata's mind. It was totally normal for teammates to see each other changing, and it's not like Kageyama didn't know he was right there.

When he finally gets done changing and turns around though, Kageyama's yelp makes Hinata realize that no, he seriously didn't know he was right there. It's enough to make Hinata burst into laughter.

“The look on your face!” he wheezes out between snorts. “Did I seriously surprise you? I've been here the whole time!”

Kageyama's face is red again, and he's scowling in the way that he does when he's embarrassed. “Fuck off, I didn't know you were capable of being quiet for more than five seconds!”

Hinata opens his mouth to start a long-overdue bout of bickering, until he glances down and stops dead. He's pretty sure his mouth is hanging open still, and by the look that flashes over Kageyama's face—annoyance to confusion and settling on horrified shame—Hinata knows what's going on.

Kageyama totally and undoubtedly has a boner.

He stares for what feels like ages but is probably only a few seconds, before finally closing his mouth. Kageyama is scrambling to grab his bag from the floor and cover up the obvious tent in his pants, but Hinata can tell from the fumbling he isn't going to get anywhere soon.

“It's not what it looks like, okay,” Kageyama blurts out when he finally has the bag in a death grip. “Even an idiot like you has to know this just happens sometimes. It's not anything weird so just leave and forget it, or I'm seriously going to kill you.”

Weird is the last thing that's on Hinata's mind, mostly preoccupied of thinking how he could use this to extort more snacks out of his partner and maybe he's also feeling a little guilty for catching Kageyama in a situation he had obviously, looking back, been trying to hide. He's about to bite out a (hopefully scathing) retort when he realizes Kageyama is still shamefaced and trying to look anywhere but at him, and guilt pangs a little stronger.

“It's not a big deal,” Hinata finally says when he settles on an action. He's never exactly been in this situation before. “One time I got hard in the middle of class, it was seriously the worst. I had to sit there through lunch and I didn't even get to eat anything.”

At this, Kageyama allows himself to snort. Of course Hinata would think only of the food he was missing and not the horrifically embarrassing predicament he'd been in. Hinata is banking on that and almost sighs in relief as he watches Kageyama's tense shoulders relax. It's only a little, but then Kageyama is never really relaxed even in the best of situations. He's about to say something when there's a knock on the door, and Daichi pops his head into the room.

“Are you guys finished yet?” He sounds irritable, but Hinata's busy watching Kageyama's face change back to some grimace of horror and before he really has a chance to think, he's jumping in front of Kageyama and facing Daichi.

“Yes!” he blurts out, nudging Kageyama behind him in what he hopes is an obvious hint to sling his bag over his shoulder. “We were just talking about practice! Right, Kageyama?”

Kageyama grunts in assent as he adjusts his back over his front and then bows, and if it's a little awkward and stiff Daichi doesn't say anything. “Sorry, we'll be leaving.” He strides forward and clamps down on Hinata's arm, dragging him out after. Even though he's pretty sure it's bruising, Hinata doesn't even say anything until they're at the bike stand and Kageyama finally releases him and turns to go.

“Wait a minute!” Hinata's jumping after Kageyama, clutching onto the back of his jacket. “You said we were gonna practice! I didn't wait that whole time for nothing!”

Incredulous, Kageyama turns back to him. “Are you seriously going to just... Do you really have that much of a one-track mind?”

They both glance down to Kageyama's bag.

Honestly, Hinata doesn't know why it's such a big deal. It's not like it isn't something they don't both deal with, as teenage boys, and he knows from experience that it'll go away sooner or later. He hopes sooner, because he's getting kind of hungry and maybe they can stop for food before they practice.

He must have been thinking out loud, because Kageyama is staring at him again. “Looks like I was too soon to think maybe you had a little bit of common sense in that thick skull of yours,” he bites out, and Hinata bristles.

“Can't we just wait for it to go away or something? You promised we were going to practice,” and if Hinata is pouting a little, he doesn't really care, because a promise is a promise.

When Kageyama doesn't answer, he grabs his arm and starts walking. Sputtered protests fall on deaf ears as Hinata marches them towards where they usually practice. When they get there, Hinata shoves Kageyama down on a nearby bench and folds his arms, settling him with a glare he hopes is intimidating.

For his part, Kageyama looks startled, and Hinata can't deny he feels a small swell of pride for catching the King off-guard. “What the fuck do you think you're doing?”

“Fixing the problem,” says Hinata, and this time his smug look over startling Kageyama is unmistakable.

“What the—are you—Dumbass Hinata!” Kageyama manages to choke out, and his face is burning at this point. “I don't want you sitting here and staring at me while my...while this goes away!”

Hinata shrugs. “You promised to practice with me and you left so early we didn't even get to stay later. Can't you just...” He glances down at Kageyama's crotch again, the bag having fallen to the wayside, and this time he does have the decency to look embarrassed. He can feel his face heating up and wills himself to reclaim that steely resolve he had just a minute ago.

But Kageyama isn't going for it. “You can't seriously fucking expect me to jack off in front of you!” He's yelling, and Hinata lurches forward to jam his hand over Kageyama's mouth. Kageyama scowls at him as Hinata takes his hand away.

“You could go behind a tree or something?” Hinata's starting to think maybe this wasn't the best idea and he could have just had Kageyama promise double the practice tomorrow, but he shakes it off, refusing to admit an idea of his isn't great.


Kageyama's spluttering again, and he looks like he's about to throw another fit, so Hinata does the first thing he thinks of. He's never really been one for second-guessing himself—he likes to think it's how he has come this far up to now. Placing his hands firmly on Kageyama's knees, he yanks his legs apart. He quickly jerks his eyes up to Kageyama rather than face the...slightly large problem staring right at him, and is rewarded with Kageyama looking absolutely shocked. His face has probably gone three more shades of red, and Hinata bites back a laugh because this is probably not a laughing situation.

“If you don't want to take care of it, I will.” He realizes how weird that sounds only after he's said it, but Hinata doesn't care at this point. He has made up his mind, and he hates going back on things he has decided on. Plus, how hard can it really be? He does it himself all the time at home or, once, in the bathroom at school. He reaches out for Kageyama's zipper before reigning himself in and glancing back up.

Hinata doesn't know what he's expecting, but it's not the resigned grimace that has settled across Kageyama's face. Reassured, Hinata only hesitates a minute before jamming his hand against the bulge in Kageyama's pants.

Kageyama grunts and slaps his hand away, which is definitely not what he was expecting. Hinata doesn't know exactly what he was expecting, but it's not that.

“If you're going to do it, do it right, idiot,” Kageyama growls, and he wasn't expecting that, either. Kageyama isn't fighting tooth and nail to keep Hinata's hands away from his junk, and Hinata's resolve almost wavers. He was definitely waiting for Kageyama to kick and scream and grab his head before marching off to take care of himself in private.

Hinata watches at Kageyama's hands go for his zipper, and notes that they might be slightly trembling. He suddenly realizes that wow, Kageyama has been dealing with a boner since the end of practice and what had Hinata been doing? Shoving Kageyama's bag back against it, forcing him to march to their practice spot; he feels bad, suddenly, and nods to himself. The least he can do is help his friend out with this, right? Wouldn't Kageyama do the same for him? Probably not, but Kageyama wouldn't really do much of anything for anybody, so it's okay. Hinata has always been a pretty giving person.

This time it's Hinata who smacks Kageyama's hands away in favor of pulling down his zipper. Hinata's tongue peeks out of the corner of his mouth at the same time as Kageyama's boxers peek out of his unzipped pants, and he stares. He knows he should pull the boxers aside too, but he's honestly never seen another boy like this, and he's not sure if he's feeling anticipation or apprehension. Maybe both.

“If you don't want to do it, you don't have to.” Kageyama's gruff voice startles Hinata out of his thoughts, and he looks up. “You're the one who offered, and for the record I was totally and completely fully against this.”

Kageyama looks like he's about to push Hinata away and stand up, and Hinata takes that as a challenge, gripping Kageyama's thighs enough to make the other boy wince. “I'm doing it!” is all he says before he lets go of Kageyama and yanks down his boxers. Kageyama yelps and immediately goes to cover himself up, but Hinata pushes his hands out of the way and grabs the dick he's been presented with, which is more than happy to see him. He feels a little bad for Kageyama's earlier suffering.

“Don't grab it so hard!” Hinata realizes Kageyama is yelling and pulls his eyes away from the staring contest he'd been having with Kageyama's intimate bits. “Do you even know how to do this? Have you ever even done this yourself?”

“Yes!” Hinata scowls and loosens his grip. This has definitely become a challenge, and he's determined to make Kageyama eat his words. He adjusts his hand, trying to get a feel for doing this at a completely different angle. Kageyama's hiss is more reassuring than it probably should be. He can do this.

Hinata starts moving his hand, slowly and experimentally. Kageyama responds by bending over, folding himself in on Hinata and partly shielding them from any passersby, which Hinata admits is not something he'd considered when he had started this. He hopes it's late enough that most people are gone, and their spot is in a pretty secluded place, anyway. He twists his wrist and Kageyama groans by his ear, curling tighter around their shared space.

He had no ideal Kageyama was so expressive about stuff like this, and it leaves Hinata a little winded. He can feel his face heating up, but he reassures himself this is stuff guys do for each other, sometimes, probably, and keeps going. He picks up a rhythm. Kageyama is breathing in his ear.

He feels a little dizzy.

“Hurry up,” Kageyama grunts, and the breathless quality makes Hinata jump. “I thought you said you knew how to do this, dumbass.”

“I do!” Hinata rubs his head over the tip of Kageyama's cock to prove it, and Kageyama's startled...moan? Kageyama seriously just moaned, and oh my god, Hinata feels his own self stirring in reaction. He wills it to go away and leans in closer, determined not to let anything distract him from completely crushing Kageyama with the expertise of his masturbation technique. He breathes out, trying to steady his nerves.

And then he hears a strangled groan, feels Kageyama tense, and there is something splattering on his face.

Before he can even register what has happened, Kageyama is shoving him away, looking absolutely mortified. “Oh my god, I'm—are you—oh my god,” he's saying, over and over, frantically rooting around in his bag for something. Hinata brings a hand up to his face and it comes away sticky and warm, and he realizes that Kageyama came in his face.

He doesn't even have time to be startled because Kageyama is down in the dirt with him, trying to mop up the mess on his face with his own practice jersey, and Hinata wrinkles his nose as the fabric scrubs across his cheeks. Kageyama is still babbling and seriously, it shouldn't be that big of a deal, right? And Kageyama's dick is still kind of hanging out of his pants and this shouldn't be as funny as it is, and before he knows it Hinata is laughing and Kageyama is staring at him like he grew another head.

Kageyama keeps staring, soiled jersey in one hand, until Hinata has composed himself enough. “You came in like five seconds!” he manages to snort out, and he's laughing again because this is honestly the most ridiculous situation he has been in and Kageyama still has not zipped his pants up.

Then Kageyama is scrambling to fix that, and they're both left sitting in the dirt.

“I had no idea you were such a quick shot, Kageyama,” Hinata says smugly, more okay with what had happened than he thinks he should be, but he doesn't mind because he's seen yet another of the cool Kageyama's embarrassing sides.

“Shut up.” Kageyama is stuffing his jersey back in his bag and standing up, and the familiar glare is back on his face. “I can't believe I felt bad for you for a second. I was going to apologize but on second thought, you deserved it.”

Hinata whines as he pushes himself to his feet. “No, apologize! If you were going to do it already, just do it!” He latches onto Kageyama's sleeve and tugs. “Apologize and toss to me, and I'll forgive you for getting my face dirty.”

Kageyama's face goes scarlet again, and he opens and closes his mouth a few times. Finally, he just lowers his head and Hinata has to crane his neck to hear the “sorry” that comes out of his mouth. Hinata's honestly a little stunned, because Kageyama never actually apologizes, so he must feel really bad. It leaves Hinata feeling a little awkward, and he shoves Kageyama's arm in what he hopes is a playful manner. It's okay, he wants to say, stop acting so weird about it. Instead, he just reaches down and pick the volleyball out of Kageyama's bag.

“Toss to me, and I'll forgive you.” And if his face is a little red, Kageyama doesn't tell him.