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Good intentions (gif)

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Translation into English:
Original male character: I like a woman… But she’s so elegant. I have no idea how to make her reciprocate my feelings.
Brother Francis: Don't worry, I’ll help you. She will be yours.
Later.
Express delivery man: Miss Ashtoreth? A secret love letter to you.
Express delivery man: I was asked to wait for an answer.
Crowley: One minute.
Crowley: Everything’s so romantic…
Crowley: Even too much so.
Crowley: What shall I write to Aziraphale in response?..
Crowley: Pornography, of course!
A little bit later.
Aziraphale: And what was your ladylove’s answer?
Original male character: She agreed! Ashtoreth agreed!
Aziraphale: What have you just said?! Nanny Ashtoreth?!
Original male character: Yes, miss Ashtoreth! We’re going on a date!
Aziraphale: ...fuck!