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Find the Future

Chapter Text

Dare to Dream
by xphilernj and Fibbie

* * *

May 2001
A.D. Skinner's Office
F.B.I. Headquarters

 

Scully couldn't take any more. She walked out of the office and
with hands on her hips, paced the hall. Within minutes Mulder
followed her out, closing the door behind him.

"Mulder, if any of this is true ..."

"If it is, or if it isn't, I want you to forget about it,
Scully."

Scully stared at him in disbelief. "Forget about it?"

Mulder replied firmly. "You're not going back out there. I'm
not going to let you go back out there."

Surprised, Scully asked, "What are you talking about?"

"It has to end sometime. That time is now."

"Mulder..."

"Scully, you have to understand that they're taking abductees.
You're an abductee. I'm not going to risk..."

He looked at her sadly, meaningfully, his voice breaking a
little.

"... losing you."

She walked slowly into his embrace. They clung tightly to each
other.

"I won't let you go alone," she said, tightening her hold on him.

* * * * * * *

Bellefleur, Oregon woods
Next evening

 

Skinner stopped the car along side the Oregon wooded area,
popped the trunk and both men got out, moving around to the
back.

"This is starting to feel like the snipe hunt I was afraid of,"
Skinner stated as he took in the surrounding area.

Mulder retrieved a backpack out of the trunk and started off into
the woods, then turned back to Skinner.

"There's no such thing as a snipe, sir," Mulder replied with a
smirk.

"Hey, you know, my ass is on the line here, too, Agent Mulder,"
Skinner shot back with irritation.

"I know that."

Mulder headed into the woods while Skinner took one more look
around and then started to follow.

* * * * * * *

A.D. Skinner's office
Same Evening

 

Scully and the Lone Gunmen were still looking through files long
after Skinner and Mulder had left for Oregon. Scully looked at
one of the files with concern and drew in a shaky breath.

"This just can't be."

"What are you looking at?" Frohike queried.

She inhaled deeply and slowly began to speak. "Medical records
-- Billy Miles and other known abductees in Bellefleur, Oregon.
They all experienced anomalous brain activity."

"Electro-encephalitic trauma," Byers said as he stepped up beside
Scully.

The other two Gunmen gathered around them.

"Which is exactly what Mulder experienced earlier this year," she
said with a sigh.

"I don't understand," Langly said, confused.

She turned to Langly and explained. "There was something out
there in that field. It knocked me back. Because it didn't want
me. Mulder thinks that it's me that's in danger of being taken."

"When it's Mulder who's in danger," Frohike worriedly replied.

Scully slowly turned back to Frohike, looking weak and
disoriented.

"Scully?" Frohike inquired as she slowly closed her eyes, swayed
and then collapsed. The three men caught her as she fell to the
floor.

"Scully! Whoa! You okay? Oh, gee." The three Gunmen called
out at once with worry and dismay over the latest event.

* * * * * * *

Seven years ago -- a lifetime for some -- a solitary man walked
alone. His vision was clear and his pursuit of the truth
relentless.

The truth was his quest.

The quest was his life; it was all-consuming and he had little
time for the vagueries of a so-called "normal" life, for liasons
or romances. He stopped for no one, gave little quarter and did
not suffer fools gladly.

Of these things, his enemies knew all too well, and plotted,
not-so-subtly, for his downfall.

So, then the man was unexpectedly blind-sided by someone who he
believed to be a spy, in the form of a partner assigned to "help
him" with his work.

It was a very obvious, very intentional breach in the deepest
caverns of the J. Edgar Hoover Building, the headquarters of the
Federal Bureau of Investigation in Washington D.C.; an invasion
into the basement office -- the lair of the infamous Lone Wolf.

He took this breach *very* seriously, trusted no one, kept his
own counsel, watched his own back -- and waited for the other
shoe to drop.

From the very beginning, however, the tenacious little redheaded
female pathologist gave him a run for his money, hanging on like
a remora on a shark. Though he ditched her at every opportunity,
deterred her at every turn and tried his best to scare her away,
her dogged determination and rigid beliefs, which were deeply
rooted in impirical facts and the hard sciences, soon proved to
him to be invaluable.

Before he realized it, *she* had become invaluable to him on a
very personal level.

After seven years of struggling, dancing around the shadows of
conspiracy, dancing around their feelings for each other and
walking headlong into an unknown future, everything changed,
literally, overnight.

Now, on that day, Special Agent Fox Mulder stepped into a life he
thought had been forever lost to him. A life of which all dreams
are made; a fairytale borne of pain -- physical, mental and
emotional -- and more tears and heartache than even he, with his
eidetic memory, could remember.

On a trip back to Bellefleur, Oregon, where their partnership had
begun seven years previously, Mulder's partner, Special Agent Dana
Scully had become ill.

When Mulder and Scully returned to D.C., she had said she was fine
but Mulder was not convinced. Given her experiences in their
earlier years working together with her near death due to a three
month abduction and disappearance, life-threatening cancer and then,
for her, the final blow, that of the discovery of infertility due
to the unexplained, unremembered but obviously horrific tests and
experiments done on her during her abduction, he was terrified
something heinous was happening to her once again, at the hands of
their enemies.

Convinced she was being set up to be abducted again (or worse,
taken to her death to punish both of them), Mulder simply refused
to let Scully go back to Bellefleur with him. He absolutely would
*not* change his mind.

Scully, on the other hand, would not allow Mulder to go back to
Oregon alone, so their immediate superior, Assistant Director Walter
Skinner, had the luck of the draw.

Before he left, Scully gave Mulder her most important possession --
the small gold cross her mother had given her as a girl, and Mulder
wore it as a sign of his deep love for her.

Concerned for Scully's health, and out of a soul-deep need to stay
in touch with her, Mulder would not even consider going into the
forest without proper communications abilities.

Mulder and Scully's somewhat bizarre but loyal friends, John Byers,
Melvin Frohike and Ringo Langly -- the Lone Gunmen -- came to their
rescue by providing Mulder and Skinner with a satellite phone, as
well as GPS devices.

As it turned out, the sat phone ended up being extremely fortuitous
because, while out in the woods, Skinner received a call from the
Gunmen, and their 'nice little trip to the forest,' was cut short:
Scully had collapsed, was sick and in the hospital.

Unfortunately for Mulder, no one could or would tell him what was
wrong with Scully, and he couldn't get back to her fast enough.

Their subsequent Pacific-to-Atlantic cross-country plane trip was
the longest and most nerve-wracking flight Mulder had ever
experienced. No amount of consoling on Skinner's part could settle
Mulder's frantic concerns and rampaging paranoia.

* * * * * * *

Upon their arrival at Dulles International Airport in D.C., Mulder
was fit to be tied and Skinner was ready to clamp the handcuffs on
him and throw Mulder in the trunk of his car.

In Mulder's mind, Skinner couldn't drive fast enough to the
hospital. He gnawed at his fingers and chafed at the seatbelt,
feeling confined.

Even before Skinner pulled to a stop, Mulder was out of the car and
running through the emergency entrance to the hospital, stopping
only long enough to get the information of his partner's
whereabouts.

The elevator ride also seemed agonizingly slow. Mulder's mind was
a gridlock of confusing thoughts and overwhelming worry. Had his
and Scully's worst fears become reality? Would they, once again,
have to face the possibility of another long uncertain revelation?
What if it was cancer again? Could he live through it if she
didn't? Would *they* have a future?

Mulder's heart had been beating like a trip-hammer. His fate was
inexplicably tied to Scully's and had been for some time. He
honestly didn't know if he could live without her.

More to the point, would he want to?

The doors opened, jolting him from his reverie. After rushing
Skinner to get him there, Mulder was now virtually paralyzed by
fear. He felt he was moving so slowly it was as if he had been
caught, like an insect, in hardening amber.

However, Mulder steadily made his way to Scully's room. He could
clearly see her through the small window in her door; she was
staring out the window into the hospital's courtyard. She looked
pale to him, which did nothing to quell his uneasiness.

Mulder knocked lightly, released a small breath of a sigh and then
cautiously pushed the door open. Attempting to put on a good front
for her, he allowed a gentle smile to grace his lips as he
approached her bed.

He didn't realize it, but he could not, however, hide his emotions
from her. Scully looked up into his fretful expression and
reached for his hand.

"Hey, Scully. Howya feeling?" Mulder asked as his fingers gently
entwined with hers.

Scully grasped his hand with both of hers and tugged lightly until
he perched on the edge of the bed next to her. She turned toward
the window for a moment, took a deep breath and slowly released it.

"Scully?" Mulder prompted softly, needing desperately to know, yet
overwhelmingly afraid of any forthcoming answers.

"Um ... I'm fine, but ... there's something I need to tell you,
Mulder." Scully struggled momentarily, as if trying to gather her
thoughts.

"Scully, you're alright, aren't you? I mean, the cancer, it's
not ... back, is it? Scully?" Mulder squeezed her fingers to get
her attention again and bent slightly toward her, needing to look
into her blue eyes. Concern laced his voice very thickly.

"No, Mulder. It's not the cancer. They checked when I was brought
in. I was frightened of that possibility, too. In fact, I had them
check twice to be certain." Scully began to explain. Her other hand
gravitated to his cheek, caressing him. "There *is* something,
though ..."

At the continued look of worry on his handsome features, she
continued hesitantly. "It's something good ... and I hope you'll
think so, too. Mulder ... um ... oh God, I can't believe this is
happening," she broke off with a choked sob.

Mulder grasped the hand that still held his face; pain and confusion
evident in his eyes and in his voice. "Please, Scully ... please
... just tell me. We'll work through it together. You know I'll be
here for you, whatever it is ... no matter what happens."

Scully looked up at him, meeting his eyes, desperately needing a
reassurance about which she was not certain. "I don't know how it
can be, but ... Mulder, I'm pregnant." Scully scanned his face for a
sign of what he might be feeling.

Mulder sat unmoving for a few moments, stunned, unable to grasp what
he had just heard. Too many questions needed to be answered. Too
many questions to ask.

He blinked away his confusion and fear, and for the first time since
his arrival, he truly saw her; truly saw his Scully.

Even though she wore no make-up, even though her hair wasn't done
to it's normal perfection and her beautiful face was streaked with
tears, Scully glowed. In fact, Mulder couldn't remember a time when
she'd looked more gorgeous than now, at this exact moment.

A smile very slowly lit up his face and eyes. Mulder released her
hands, then placed his on her cheeks and his thumbs chased the
tears away. He leaned in and kissed her very, very tenderly. He
felt her arms stretch up and encircle his neck.

Mulder dropped his arms down around her waist and pulled her closer
to him to deepen their kiss. He leaned back from her and buried
his nose in her hair. His audible sigh did not go unnoticed.

"Mulder?" Scully whispered. With uncertainty, she asked, "Are
you okay?"

Within his embrace, she nuzzled his neck. A shiver of delight
raced down Mulder's back and he smiled again. He leaned back and
looked into her beautiful blue eyes, which were filled with tears.

"Scully, I was terrified from the moment Skinner told me you were
in the hospital until I walked into this room. I didn't know what
to think or do." Mulder shook his head slightly in disbelief, but
the smile didn't disappear. "Scully, I have so many questions for
which I know we'll never get answers. I thought because the IVFs
failed that you would never ... God, Scully, how can this be?
How ... who?"

Scully couldn't help herself, she laughed at his question.

"As for 'how' ... the birds and the bees ... and the monkey babies,
Mulder." Scully shyly smiled at him and blinked back another
onslaught of happy tears. "As to 'who,' well ... you, Mulder, only
ever you." Scully's tears broke loose and cascaded down.

"Me, Scully? Really? But I thought ..." Mulder stopped and then
with realization dawning, his face lit with the most beautiful
smile Scully had ever seen. "Oh." Mulder blinked his own teary
eyes, leaned in again and placed soft kisses across her face.

Scully giggled, actually giggled, at Mulder's brief discomfort,
then simply enjoyed his sweet kisses. He dropped his head on her
shoulder and chuckled, happy he could bring her a smile, even at
his own expense.

"Scully, this is so unbelievable." He raised his head and clasped
her hands between his. "Are you happy, Scully? Are you okay with
this? I know how badly you've wanted a baby, but ... are you
really, truly, fine with this?"

"Oh God, yes. Yes, I am. But, Mulder, what about you? I know we
didn't really talk about what would happen if I did get pregnant,
but it became a moot point when the IVFs didn't take." She
hesitated for a moment, looking into his bright hazel eyes and
then continued. "I don't want you to feel obligated in any way,
but I *do* want our baby to know his or her father ... I want you
to be a part of our baby's life, in whatever way you want to be
involved. I want you to be there for us. But only if you want to
be ..." Scully's voice trailed off into a whisper with the last
statement, slightly hoarse.

"Scully, I won't lie to you. I'm absolutely terrified at the
prospect of being responsible for such a small life." Mulder took
in a deep breath and then continued. "You know me, Scully. I've
been responsible for only myself for such a long, long time and,
in some respects, for a short time, yours as well.

"Scully, I never thought ... never dreamed that this would be an
option for me. After I found your ova during your cancer, and
then told you ... and then the IVFs didn't take, I gave up every
one of my own hopes and dreams for a family of my own ... and
fatherhood.

"And, Scully, I wanted the IVFs to work. I truly *did* have those
hopes and dreams ... but with you. Only with you. You ... you
never knew it, but I grieved with you, for you, for us..." Mulder
squeezed her fingers lightly, and reached up to wipe a stray tear
away, allowing his thumb to soothe her soft skin long after the
tear was gone, then continued.

"I'm not sure what our future will hold, but Scully," Mulder told
her as he looked deeply into her eyes, "I would love to find that
future -- together, as a family -- with you and our little one."

Scully blinked, tears now freely streaming down her cheeks.
"Mulder, I ... we ..."

Mulder stopped her with a finger to her lips.

"Scully, I love you ... more than I can ever say in mere words,"
He stroked her cheek with the palm of his hand and then kissed her
forehead.

Scully nervously laughed. "Is that a proposal, Mulder?" She was
only half serious but hopeful just the same.

"Yes," Mulder quietly replied, although a bit hesitant.

Her eyes closed and she sighed. "I love you, Mulder. With all my
heart, all that I am, all that I'll ever be."

Scully tilted her head up and Mulder met her lips eagerly with his
own, hugging her tightly to him, then quickly backing off and
looking down at her abdomen, fear obvious in his eyes. Scully
lifted his face to hers and reassured him with a sweet smile that
it was alright, that he was not hurting either her or the baby.

She took his hand, placed it on her abdomen where their baby was
growing and held it there gently. Mulder watched their hands for
a moment, dreaming of a future he could still only imagine, of a
beautiful new baby with auburn curls and blue eyes.

"We have our miracle, Scully," he whispered.

Then, smiling broadly, Mulder looked up to see a matching smile on
Scully's face, leaned forward and kissed her deeply and lovingly;
he never wanted to let her go again.

If anyone could arrange such an occurrence, it would be Fox Mulder.

* * * * * * *

Outside the door of Dana Scully's room, Skinner watched his two
favorite renegade agents engage in their intimate embrace. He
paused a moment longer and then started back down the hall to
give them the privacy they so badly needed. He would find out
the why's and wherefores tomorrow.

For now, both agents were safe and together. What the future held
for them, he didn't know.

However, A.D. Walter Skinner was smiling as he left the hospital,
heading home.

* * * * * * *