Harry swirled the amber liquid in his glass. He took a sip slowly, allowing the burn of the firewhiskey to fill his mind. Ever since the end of the war where he defeated Voldemort, the eyes of the wizarding word has been on him. You would think he would be used to it by now, but it made him more self conscious. He knew he had to kill Voldemort, just as the prophecy predicted, but he had no idea why they continued to watch him as if he was going to do something special.
Usually he hung out in muggle bars so that he wouldn’t be recognized, but the reporters were getting more and more daring. He would have to find another place to hang out that wasn’t so close to the wizarding world, otherwise he would be stuck like he was now, drinking at home alone.
He sighed. Him and Ginny had another row the other day. She couldn’t understand why it bothered him to be in the spotlight so much. She was famous in her own right now, as seeker to the famous Hollywap Harpies Quidditch team. She enjoyed the spotlight. She couldn’t understand that he was in the spotlight all of his life since entering the wizarding world, and now he just wanted to be an ordinary guy. He wanted the normal life that was never granted to him as a child.
The only place he had felt like a normal person was at the Weasley home. Ron and Hermione were married with their first child on the way. The news couldn’t have made Molly happier. Even George, who was still bummed about Fred’s death, managed a smile at the news. Fleur and Bill had insisted they wanted to wait to have children, and it was a disappointment to Molly, so the news of a child put a smile on her face.
Harry wanted a child, but Ginny was against it. She said she was in her prime and that’s why they were waiting until their marriage and to have children. He never brought it up again as it seemed to makes things tense around the Weasley home as Ginny never hid her feelings, even in the company of her family. Hermione said to just give her time, and she would come around, but Harry had a gut feeling that it wouldn’t be any time soon.
The jealous feeling of the happiness of Ron and Hermione made him feel guilty. They deserved to be happy, even more than others, since they were by his side and fought with him. They faced death also, and he was truly happy for them. The smile on their faces when they rubbed Hermione’s belly ate away at him. He didn’t want them to think he wasn’t happy for them, so he faked the smiles, but got away as soon as he could. It hurt that others were being so happy, but it seemed to be out of his reach.
He heard a WHOOSH, and the green flames blazed in his fireplace. Harry was surprised to see Charlie Weasley’s face in the fire.
“Hey Harry! I was wondering where you went to.” his smile reminded him so much of George and Fred.
“I’m just enjoying some firewhiskey at home.” he said nonchantly. He gestured to the armchair beside him. “You’re more than welcome to join me.” He made the offer although he wasn’t really in the mood for company. Charlie wasn’t home from Romania often, so he knew the chance was rare, and it was polite.
Charlie Weasley stepped into Harry’s home. He looked around. “Nice place you got here.” he commented.
Harry shrugged. “Living around Muggles has it benefits.” He smiled slightly. “It more quiet.”
Charlie plopped down in the chair Harry had offered. He poured himself a glass of firewhiskey. “Reporters bothering you again?” he asked.
Out of all of the Weasley family, Charlie was the most blunt. He never meant any harm by it, but he never saw the point of tip-toeing around issues. He must have gotten that part of his personality from being around dragons so long. Harry nodded. “One of them dared to go into the Muggle bar I usually hang out at. It almost caused a scene.”
Charlied raised his eyebrows at that. “That was a bold move on their part.” He took a sip of the firewhiskey. “Aren’t you a bit young for drinking?” he asked.
Harry glared at him. “I’m now 20.”
Charlie chuckled. “Sometimes it’s hard to believe how old you’re getting.”
“I feel older than what I actually am.” Harry admitted softly.
Charlie just looked at him. “You have every right to.”
Harry snorted. “Tell that to everyone else.”
Charlie gazed at him. “I don’t need to, they already know it.” He took another sip. “They just want you to live your life happily. You’re not that old, and have many years ahead of you now.”
“Happy.” Harry said the word softly. “What exactly is happiness?” he asked.
Charlie pondered at the question. “Happiness is different for everyone. You just need to find someone to shares the same goals to be happy.”
This was the first time someone had even came close to indicating that the relationship of him and Ginny wasn’t heading towards the same goals. Everyone always assumed they would work things out and they would get married and be happy like Ron and Hermione. “Do you think Ginny and I will be happy?” he asked bluntly.
Charlie downed his glass. “That is up to you and her.” he said finally.
“I was asking your opinion.” Harry pressed.
“I don’t want you taking my opinion as advice Harry.” Charlie explained. “I’m in no position to give love advice.” indicating his currently single status.
“You aren’t afraid to give you opinion any other time Charlie.” he pointed out.
Charlie sighed. “Yes, but I don’t want my opinion to influence your relationship with my sister.” The true reasoning came out with those words.
Harry looked at him. “So you think that your opinion will change mine? Is it only because Ginny is your sister?”
Charlie nodded slowly. “I don’t want......” he sighed. “Fine. No. I don’t think you and Ginny will be happy. You two have two different ideas on what happiness is, and they don’t coinside with each other. Maybe in the future, it might change, but right now, you are both wanting different paths.”
“Thank you.” Harry said after a moment of silence.
Charlie poured him and Harry another glass. “Why are you thanking me?”
“You are the only one honest enough to tell me what you think. Everyone keeps telling me that everything will be ok.” he sighed. “Even though our arguments are getting worse and more frequent, all I’m ever told is to hang in there.”
Charlie looked at the younger man. “Do you love her?” he asked.
Harry leaned his head back and closed his eyes. “At one time I think I did.” He then sat up and gazed in his glass. “As the war ended, and things finally became normal, I started feeling more and more that it was only in the heat of the danger.”
“Sort of like bonding to get through a trauma?” Charlie asked.
Harry nodded. “There was a damn good chance I wasn’t going to make it out alive.” he chuckled mirthlessly. “And I almost didn’t. Once everything was done, I just wanted a quiet life. A home and a family.” He sighed. “Ginny now craves the spotlight that I wish to avoid.”
“Have you been honest with her about it?” Charlie asked.
Harry nodded. “That’s why we argue. She doesn’t want to settle down yet. She is in her prime and the star of her team. She keeps wanting to wait until closer to her to retire.”
“If you feel that way, why don’t you go your separate ways?” he asked.
Harry looked panicked for a moment before calming down. “I don’t know. I keep feeling like I’m losing someone else every time I think if breaking it off.” He felt tears prickle at the corner of his eyes. “I can’t lose anyone else Charlie. It hurts too much.”
Charlie put his glass down and went to kneel down in front of Harry. “You wouldn’t lose her, in a sense. You are like a son to Mum and family to us. Even if you were to break it off with her, do you think that we would just leave you?”
Harry avoided his eyes. He knew he shouldn’t feel that way, but deep down, he was afraid the Weasley family would reject him if he would break it off with Ginny. “I don’t know.” he finally admitted softly.
Charlie enveloped him in a hug. “Harry, no matter what, you are family to us, even if Ginny and you break it off. There might be some harsh feelings at first.” he admitted. “But we would never turn our backs on you.”
For the first time in a long time, Harry felt truly comforted. This wasn’t someone that was telling him false words to make him feel better. He was being comforted by the truth, and no sugar coating.
He noticed, for the first time, the strength of Charlie’s arms. He knew he was muscular by working with dragons daily, but he never experienced it firsthand. He could hear his heartbeat through his chest where his head was laying. He felt an uncomfortable stirring in his pants. This was the closest he’s been to anyone in awhile, and even Ginny didn’t stir him like this anymore.
Harry blushed and shifted to hide his growing arousal. He didn’t want to embarrass himself and Charlie. This was the first time anyone had been so honest with him, and he felt horrible that his body was acting this way. The last thing he wanted was Charlie to hate him.
“Harry, are you alright?” Charlie asked.
Harry blushed again. “Yeah, I guess I just drank a bit too much.” he used anything as an excuse.
Charlie chuckled. “I would probably have to say the same.” Harry looked at him in surprise. He thought he was able to handle alcohol better. Charlie shrugged. “I rarely drink. It’s not safe not to have your complete wits about you when dealing with dragons.”
Harry nodded in understanding. “I know Molly’s place is packed at the moment.” he paused. “You’re more than welcome to stay in my spare bedroom for the night.”
Charlie grinned. “Thanks mate. I don’t want Mom to see me in this state.”
Harry got up and turned away so that Charlie wouldn’t see his arousal. “I’ll show you where your room is then.”
Harry was lying in his bed. He was confused as to his body’s reaction earlier. He had never been interested in guys before! In fact, him and Ginny had shagged on multiple occasions, which she was always careful to take birth control. Lately, nothing she did was able to get him aroused, and she blamed it on stress. He believed her, as he never had a reason to believe otherwise.
Just remembering Charlie’s arms around him caused his cock to twitch. Harry moaned. It had been months since he was sexually aroused. He curled up in a ball. He was embarrassed that he had a hard on for his girlfriend’s brother! Especially one that was sleeping next door. He had known Charlie for years, and he had never reacted this way before.
He clenched his fists and closed his eyes. He needed to get some sleep and get over this. It would be so embarrassing to wank off and for Charlie to hear him, so he resisted the urge. He finally fell asleep.