Keep Boredom at Bay

by KandiSheek

Summary:

One slip of the thumb means that Tony just texted a picture of his dick to Captain America instead of his casual hookup. Which is just as well because the guy hates him anyways.

It's certainly the weirdest way he's ever managed to break the ice.

Notes:

• Translation into Русский available: Скажи скуке «нет» by littledoctor

Hey guys! So this is a bit of a weird project for me. I saw this wonderful guide to an iOS work skin ("How to Make iOS Text Messages on AO3"), created by the lovely CodenameCarrot and La_Temperanza and I got super excited about it so of course I wanted to try it out for myself. That's basically how this happened.

I've written a couple chapters already so I'm going to try to upload one a day until this story ends up wherever it's going to end up (I really have no idea where I'm going with this but that's the whole fun in it)! I'm pretty sure I can stick to that upload schedule since the chapters will end up being pretty short.

WARNING: THIS STORY WILL HAVE PICTURES OF ACTUAL DICKS IN IT ONCE WE GET TO THE SEXTING! IF YOU DON'T WANT TO SEE THAT PLEASE CLICK AWAY NOW!!!

Also, if it's not your default setting, please click on "Show Creator's Style", otherwise the formatting won't make any sense. You can click on any of the pictures in the fic to see them in a higher resolution. Thank you so much for reading and I hope you enjoy this!

Chapter 1: Saturday (NSFW)

Notes:

EDIT: So it's been brought to my attention (rightfully so) that my use of non-celebrity (basically non-RDJ or Chris Evans) people's faces in this fic is a problem. Which - even though I didn't use these images in a bad or sexual context - is absolutely valid. I've decided to blur all the faces in pictures of real life people in this fic (aside from those that are already a meme) to protect their privacy and also to prevent people from reverse google image searching these pictures. I know it sort of takes away from the realism of this fic but I think it's a good compromise. I apologize for not taking these precautions earlier and I sincerely hope that with this I prevent anyone from going after people's real identities (not that I think anyone would but it's good to be safe).

Thank you so much for your comment, ladysunflower, and I hope you guys have fun reading this fic.

Anthony Edward Stark

Today 1:32 AM
hey u awake?



im up ;)

...Tony?

yes?

What the heck is this?

ah shit

yuore not suze

Who or what is Suze?

nvm. sorry bout this cap

Nvm?

nevremind

s text lingo

tlingo

Tony, are you drunk?

no

yes

Jesus Christ

Tony, why are you sending me a picture like this at two in the morning?

You should be asleep.

pot kettle

also the ppics not for u

my mistake

You shouldn't be sending anyone pictures like this, especially when you're drunk.

an whatare you my mother

Please just go sleep it off. You'll feel better in the morning.

it nevr feels better inthe morning

Just go to sleep. Please.

k

m still hard tho

Go. To. Sleep.

2:12 AM
Jarvis says you're still on your phone. Turn it off and go to sleep!

2:43 AM
I really hope you don't read this in the morning.

Notes:

Edit: So there was a problem with the picture being locked for most people. If it still doesn't show up for you, please tell me so I can keep trying to fix it!