The first time Jungkook saw Park Jimin was when he was forced to go to BT6's concert with his brother –Junghyun– who was a big fan of the said boyband.
Jungkook didn't even know the group until then, but Park Jimin came up to the stage to do his solo and as soon as he started to dance, in all white; Jungkook felt transfixed at the sight, lost and speechless by the man's mere presence. Park Jimin was flowing in dance as if it was the only way his body truly knew how to speak. Saying Jungkook was mesmerized would be an understatement.
At that moment, Jungkook literally knew his life was going to change completely.
"You really did it, huh. I could never imagine you changing so much after a concert i took you forcefully two years ago." Junghyun chuckled along with Jungkook, squeezing his brother's shoulder and sighing thoughtfully, "I'm proud of you." He stated with confidence.
Jungkook smiled up to his brother, his eyes filling with tears but his heart content that he had a brother so supporting like Junghyun.
"Thank you hyung." He whispered, a tear escaping from his eye and sliding down his cheek.
"Wow, stop crying." Junghyun giggled, wiping Jungkook's tear. Jungkook didn't comment on his brother's own glossy eyes. Instead, he hugged him and waved at him when the train finally arrived.
"I will be famous next time you see me!" Jungkook yelled before getting into the train.
"You better be, brat!" His brother yelled back, laughing and waving at his brother.
Jungkook smiled at his brother for the last time before finally getting inside and settling on his seat, putting his little suitcase next to him and looking out of the window. He watched the scenery of Busan when train started to move. There was an uneasiness inside him that was caused by the knowledge of he was moving away from the city he born and grew, with nothing but a small suitcase and dreams that were too big for his little world.
Only when he saw the signboard 'BUSAN~' written on it with big letters that it actually hit him that he was leaving Busan and his family back. The tears he tried to keep at bay suddenly stormed down his cheeks as pitiful sobs forced itself out of his throat.
He was so lame. But he couldn't help it. He never stayed away from his family more than a few days. But now, he was going to Seoul all alone, knowing nothing about the big city and its people.
"For fuck's sake, Jungkook. You are already eighteen, not a little kid!" He slapped his face with two hands and took a deep breath. The old lady sitting across him eyed him confusedly but Jungkook forced a smile at her and watched the deserted roads which were hopefully going to take him to his dreams.
Finding BigHit building was not hard since Jungkook came here for auditions with his brother last month. But still, it wasn't less nerve-racking.
Staff sent him an e-mail one week ago, saying he was accepted as a trainee and Jungkook could still remember how shocked and happy he felt when he first read the message. His brother and parents were just as happy for him and Jungkook couldn't thank God enough for having such an understanding and supportive family.
According to e-mail, he had to bring couple of reports about his health-being and such before coming to the company to finally start his days as a trainee. He was going to stay at the dorms with other trainees and thankfully dorms were only a few buildings away from the company.
Smiling at the tall building of BigHit, Jungkook finally stepped forward to his dreams.
First few days passed with trainees getting to know each other as well as staff also got to know them. Even Bang Sihyuk –CEO of Bighit– visited and encouraged them in the practice room, Jungkook was flattered.
He called his family almost everyday, telling them how amazing everything was going. Junghyun asked him if he saw BT6 everytime they talked but Jungkook rolled his eyes and told him there was no way they were coming to the floor trainees were practicing.
Top two floors of the building belonged BT6. All the members had their individual studios there. There were a few practice rooms and lounges exclusive to them, too. There was even a gaming room according to some trainees. Not that they would knew. After all, trainees weren't allowed to go to top floors. That floors literally had codes on the elevator.
Even if Jungkook wasn't showing it to his brother, actually he, too, couldn't stop expecting seeing the famous boyband with his own eyes. His friends –which he made here– were saying members would definitely greet the new trainees when they were back from their vacation. Jungkook only hoped so.
After all, the actual reason he was in a whole different city to chase his dreams was none other than Park Jimin.
The corridor was pitch dark, no light reaching to it, not even from outside since it was night time. Jungkook couldn't dare to turn the lights on either. Because he wasn't supposed to be here. This floor wasn't being used since half of its windows were under the ground, almost like a basement. Company bought it at first because they could only afford this much. Now they owned the whole building, though, so they stopped using this floor. It was nothing more than a storage for the company now.
Jungkook was supposed to be in the dorms now. But he felt like suffocating there. After all, it was their dorm-mates who caused him feeling like this.
When he first met his dorm-mates, he loved all of them and in no time they became friends. Jungkook was having so much fun with training and spending time with them. But apparently he was the only one thinking like that.
He was the last one coming to dorms since he preferred practicing on his own after everyone left. Today was the same. When he finaly arrived the dorm, he wasn't expecing to hear a few of his said friends talking behind his back. Jungkook couldn't even go inside and ask them why they did it. Instead, he ran back to the company, to the floor no one used, so he could cry silently until he had the will to go back to the dorms again.
With the flashlight of his phone, he finally found a room with an old couch in it. He looked around the room which seemed like a practice room, one of its wall full of mirrors, and there were a few desks and chairs covered with dust.
Jungkook patted the oddly clean couch just in case before settling on it and turned the flashlight off. When he hugged his knees into his chest and buried his face between his arms, tears were already falling down his cheeks. Jungkook tried not to be so loud but the sobs he let out were impossible to hold in.
He was disappointed and also heartbroken. But he couldn't help thinking it was expected. After all, since he came here, everything was going unnaturally well. Jungkook was fool for believing it was keep going like that.
Suddenly the urge to call his brother and tell everything to him filled his mind. But it was already midnight and Jungkook didn't want to make his brother worried. Even though his brother could most definitely comfort him in the best way.
Sniffling, Jungkook wiped his eyes with the sleeves of his hoodie and sighed, thinking what he made wrong for his said friends to talk behind his back like that.
Jungkook almost jumped when his phone suddenly vibrated with a meesage. From Yeonjun, asking him where he was and saying he was worried.
Yeonjun wasn't one of the people that were talking behind his back. But still, Jungkook wasn't sure who to trust anymore. Although deep down he knew Yeonjun wouldn't do something like that, Jungkook's head was a mess right now. He still messaged Yeonjun back, saying he was still practicing and going to be late.
When Yeonjun messaged him, saying not to push himself too hard, Jungkook locked his phone and rested his head back on the couch. He closed his eyes and thought what he was going to do after this. Not that he was planning to give up on his dreams just because some of the trainees talked behind his back. But Jungkook couldn't imagine looking at their faces knowing they were only pretending to be a friend.
He starts crying again. Not only because he was feeling betrayed but also because he missed home. He didn't try holding his sobs back this time. Not that anyome was going to be here at this godly hour.
Or he thought so.
Jungkook's breath hitched at the sound. He slapped his mouth shut and stopped crying, trying not to make any noise as footsteps got closer and closer. His heart was beating like crazy.
There wasn't supposed to be anyone here. What if someone saw Jungkook coming here and informed the security guard? What if company fired him for not following the rules? What if.. it was someone dangerous?
"Who is there?"
Jungkook gasped so loud that if the person in the corridor didn't notice him before, now there was no way they didn't know. Jumping over the backrest, Jungkook quickly hid himself behind the couch, cursing at himself for being easily panicked.
Footsteps stopped momentarily before starting to get closer again, even faster now. Jungkook saw the flashlight dancing around the walls and reflecting on the mirrors.
He was so scared. Whoever it was, Jungkook was definitely going to be fired now. His parents and brother were going to be so disappointed.
Jungkook flinched at the soft and somehow familiar voice but didn't raise his head from where he buried it between his arms, hugging his knees to his chest and trembling.
The owner of the voice touched his shoulder and Jungkook almost screamed when he noticed the person was already by his side.
"I– i'm sorry! I was– just– looking fo– for some place– to.. to–" Jungkook started to babble. He raised his head from where he hid it, but he couldn't dare look at the person's face. Instead opting for looking at their shoes which looked pretty expensive.
"Hey, hey.. Calm down, now." The person comforted and Jungkook's eyes widened when he finally recognized the soft voice he knew by heart. He quickly whipped his head up and tried to catch the person's face in the lights which was already turned on.
And Jungkook almost fainted when he saw the face of his dreams right there, smiling at him amusedly, all crescent eyes and chubby cheeks.
"Pa– Park Jimin?" He babbled dumbly. But the chuckle he earned from Jimin was worth it. His heart almost exploded from the sound he adored so much. Though hearing it in real life was absolutely better than hearing it from his phone's speaker.
"Yes, it's me." Jimin said, making Jungkook's heart stutter in his chest, "And you?"
Jungkook wasn't sure if he was somehow dreaming. There was no way Park Jimin was in front of him, smiling at him and asking him his name. But even if it was a dream, Jungkook decided to play along it. He immediately stood up, causing Jimin to gasp surprisedly, and bowed a ninety degree before introducing himself.
"Je– Jeon Jungkook. 18 years old. BigHit trainee. Nice to me– meet you sunbae-nim! I'm a bi– big fan!" He stuttered but he was glad at least he could still speak.
"Okay, Jungkook-ssi." Jimin said playfully and Jungkook almost cried at the sound of his name coming out of his idol's mouth. "You can get up."
Jungkook stood upright, moving like a robot, but it was so hard to stay still when Jimin was only a few feet away from him and smiling at him. His heart was literally on an overdrive, beating as if Jungkook ran tousands of miles without a stop.
Jimin eyed him head to toe and Jungkook felt his legs wobble at the intensity of Jimin's eyes. He felt like he was being split to the pieces and analyzed. Jimin's eyes stopped at his face again and Jungkook swallowed thickly at the frown on the other's face. Even though it disappeared quickly and a little smile stretched on his lips, Jungkook knew Jimin wasn't playing around anymore.
"As much as i know, trainees aren't supposed to be here." Jimin said.
Jungkook didn't know what to say. He was utterly ashamed for breaking the rules and getting caught by the person he least expected. The tears filled his eyes for the nth time that night but Jungkook ducked his head down and bit down on his bottom lip to prevent them escaping again. He didn't want to seem so weak in front of his idol. Though, he probably already looked lame enough.
"Are you.." Jimin started but Jungkook didn't look at him, instead closed his eyes and waited for the words that was probably going to be last words Jimin told him before he was fired, "...okay? I heard you crying."
Jungkook looked up at Jimin with wide eyes. There was no way the worried expression on Jimin's face was fake. It was just.. so real, so sincere, so gentle. Jungkook couldn't help remembering his brother, and that was enough for him to let go of his tears once again. A pitiful sob escaped his lips and Jungkook immediately covered his face with his hands, feeling embarrassed for crying in front of the person he adored the most.
"Oh God." Jimin sounded surprised but still held Jungkook's shoulders and motioned him to sit on the old couch. Jungkook continued to wipe at the still running tears with his sleeves. He hated himself for being so lame but when Jimin settled next to him to rub his back while telling him 'it was okay', Jungkook couldn't bring himself to think something else except Jimin's comforting hands.
He felt safe. Even though Jungkook never complained until now, he never completely felt like he belonged here, either. But now, he felt like he was home again. He wasn't sure if it was Jimin's hand soothing circles on his back or his soft voice telling him 'it was okay'. It didn't matter since now Jungkook was feeling so much better.
"My friends..." He started to explain even though Jimin didn't ask him. But he was feeling so safe next to Jimin, as if he could tell him everything, "I heard them talking behind my back." He sniffled. Jimin hummed him to continue so Jungkook did, "I always stay back more when we finish practicing as group. Wh– when i went to dorms today, some of my friends were saying i was a tryhard and was only faking my personality because i–" Jungkook hiccupped, "–i did only care about being famous." His tears flowed down his cheeks again. Jungkook couldn't control them anymore after reminding what the people he thought of friends felt about him. Jimin rubbed his back with his palm again and shushed him until his loud sobs turned into silent cries.
"Trying hard is nothing to be ashamed of, though." Jimin said thoughtfully, "It's even something to be proud of."
Jungkook nodded, agreeing with Jimin before the latter continued:
"About your friends.. Or whatever you call them.. The best way to solve it is to talking to them directly." Jimin stopped momentarily and talked with a serious tone next. "I remember you, Jungkook."
Jungkook turned his eyes to Jimin in lightning speed, literally gaping at him. Jimin chuckled at his expression.
"We watched audition videos. Actually we, i mean my group, even helped choosing the new trainees. And i remember you very well. I was mesmerized by your performance."
"Really?" Jungkook literally squeaked. He couldn't find anything to say, as if his brain stopped working. This must be a dream.
"Really." Jimin echoed, chuckling fondly, "And this is definitely not a dream."
Jungkook blushed as he realized he said it out loud. But before he could dwell on it, he thought about Jimin watching his audition video. Jimin said he was even mesmerized by him? Jungkook couldn't help the bright smile that bloomed on his face.
"Hmm, that's better. You're even cuter with a smile." Jimin hummed satisfiedly, referring to Jungkook's smile.
Jungkook flushed to the tips of his ears and ducked his head down embarrassedly. There was no way this wasn't a dream. Jimin would only praise him and call him cute in Jungkook's dreams. In reality, Jimin was unreachable. Or he thought so all this time.
But the person sitting next to him and telling him it wasn't a dream was none other than Park Jimin. His idol. His dreams.
"So.." Jimin pulled his hand back and Jungkook missed the warm feeling already, "If staff finds out you are not at dorms, they will not take it well. You better go back."
Jungkook's face fell as he imagined facing with people who talked behind his back. They were probably asleep even if he went to dorms now, but eventually they will have to see each other.
"Don't pout." Jimin cooed. Jungkook couldn't stop blushing at Jimin's soft voice. He wanted to stay here with Jimin, instead of going back to the bitter reality. Even if he was dreaming, Jungkook wanted to enjoy it as much as he could.
"Su– sunbae." He called, trying to look at Jimin's face but failing and averting his eyes occasionally because Jimin was too close and Jungkook was still starstruck. "Why are you here?"
Jimin frowned cutely, probably not expecting the conversation to turn this way. Jungkook hoped he didn't go too far.
"Well." Jimin drawled and looked around the room. Jungkook took the chance and stared at Jimin's handsome features while he explained, "This practice room is where everything started for us." He seemed nostalgic, and kind of sad, Jungkook noted.
"It must be special for you." Jungkook added. Jimin nodded in agreement.
"We have practice rooms and our idividual studios at the top floors but i still can't stop myself from coming here whenever i feel lost."
Jimin had a little smile playing on his lips. It wasn't a sad smile, but wasn't a happy one either. Jungkook couldn't describe it but he still felt like he knew what Jimin meant.
"Anyways.." Jimin shrugged with an awkward chuckle.
"I understand!" Jungkook exclaimed excitedly. Jimin looked at him, seeming amused. "I mean.." Jungkook blushed, averting his eyes, "I think i can understand. Since i came here and became a trainee, i sometimes feel like i don't know myself anymore. Everything feels so new. Just a few weeks ago, i was in Busan, dancing in front of the mirror in my room. But now i'm in Seoul, in one of the biggest company. It's like.." Jungkook gestured with his hands as if he could explain it by showing it, "I dont know.. I also feel lost, i guess."
Jungkook noticed Jimin was staring at him without saying anything. He suddenly felt dumb for talking so much.
"Sorry, i was babbling.." He apologized immediately.
"Ah, no. I was just.. thinking the same." Jimin whispered his last words. Jungkook looked at him with big eyes. And when Jimin smiled at him with his crescent eyes, Jungkook couldn't help smiling back. "So you are from Bu–"
Jimin's phone rang, cutting his speak. He quickly took it out and rolled his eyes while taking the call.
"What is it, Tae?"
Jungkook held his breath. It was probably Kim Taehyung on the other side of the phone. Now he thought about it, he was really sitting on a couch with Park Jimin of BT6. He even had a conversation with him and was called cute by him. Jungkook put his hands between his knees and tried not to smile so much, he was probably already looking like a freak because of his bright red cheeks.
Jimin said he was coming in a few minutes before ending the call. Jungkook tried not to show his disappointment too much on his face.
"I gotto g– hey, why are you pouting?" Jimin chuckled amusedly.
"Sorry.. I was just.." Jungkook sighed, "..happy that i could talk to you. And thankful, too. I feel so much better but.. i wish i could talk to you more.." Jungkook blurted out, feeling his cheeks burn. Jimin ruffled his hair while laughing at him fondly.
"You're so cute. Well, i shouldn't be this close to a trainee actually..." Jimin giggled when Jungkook pouted even more at his words, "..but who knows. Since we both come here when we feel lost, maybe we can bump into each other more often, hm?"
Jungkook looked up to Jimin with big expectant eyes. Jimin winked at him before getting up.
"Th– thank you, sunbae!" Jungkook almost yelled, smiling brightly at the meaning under Jimin's words.
"Yeah, you really should smile more." Jimin nodded, causing Jungkook's heart to flutter, "Anyways, i should go. You should also go back."
"Yes!" Jungkook got up from his place suddenly.
Jimin left the floor first after waving at Jungkook and reminding him to turn the lights off before leaving. Jungkook watched him until he disappeared into the corridor, heart beating fast. He had to bury his face into his hands and scream silently before finally leaving.