“God, where the fuck are you?”
Yoongi angrily slams his fist against the roof of the car as the other holds his phone, still connected to Namjoon’s voicemail. He’s this close to just jumping in the car to fucking get away from here. And considering there’s an entire trunk of stolen jewelry, it would be clever to do so.
But Yoongi has never left Namjoon hanging and the same goes the other way around.
So, he waits.
He’s nervously chewing on his bottom lip as he tries calling the other again, the voicemail yet again greeting him.
‘Hello, this is Namjoon. I’m currently not available. If it’s urgent, try calling my partner at one, zero—‘
“God dammit!” The car yet again has to take one of Yoongi’s punches. Just when he’s about to start actually searching for Namjoon, Yoongi sees him pop up on the other side of the street.
“Get in the car! Fucking get in the car!”, Namjoon shouts as he runs across the road, sharply dodging a car that he oversaw before crossing.
Yoongi knows he doesn’t have much time to question the other’s behavior and does as told. He quickly starts the car as Namjoon struggles to open the door of the passenger seat, and starts driving when the other has barely pulled both his legs into the vehicle.
“What the actual fuck, Joon?” Yoongi hisses, only sending a quick glare at the other, definitely driving too fast for his eyes to not be on the road right now. If this gets him a ticket, the two of them are fucked.
“Sorry, I, uh, got us food. But I left the store without paying, so-“
“We got credit cards for a reason, you fucking idiot!” Yoongi continues speaking through gritted teeth. “We don’t need to risk getting caught, really.”
“The credit cards are fake!”
“They still work, don’t they?” Yoongi finally slows down the car and risks taking a look at Namjoon. “Listen, I’m not exactly fond of this on-the-run shit either, but if we really want to avoid getting caught, our asses need to be more careful. We got fake IDs and fake credit cards and it all works, but if just one security camera catches our faces, we’re done for.”
He really hates scolding Namjoon, especially with all that they’ve been through. But despite being so god damn smart, that guy sometimes really doesn’t think.
“I’m just wondering”, the younger says after a few moments of silence, “that guy who made this stuff for us-“
“Yeah, whatever. How exactly was he able to create fake credit cards?” Namjoon finally retreats one of the burgers from the paper bags and unwraps it before handing it to Yoongi. “You know, usually to get a credit card, you go to the bank, you make an account, and before they even allow you a credit card, they make sure there’s no debts, right?”
Yoongi gratefully takes the burger, then responds with his mouth full. “I honestly try not to think about it too much. They work, that’s it. Yeah, shit’s illegal but they’re already trying to catch us for a bunch of stuff, might as well lock us up for credit card fraud too.”
“It’s not just credit card fraud, though. It’s identity fraud.” Namjoon now takes a bite of his own burger. “Like, shit, we already are fucked for armed robbery, now this? I imagined this to be more of a Peter Pan thing.”
“Robin Hood, for the thousandth time.” Yoongi can’t help but laugh. “And hey, it still is a Robin Hood thing, we take from the rich and give to the poor. It’s just grown a little bigger than we originally intended.”
“A little”, Namjoon scoffs. “Our parents think we’re dead, we’re faking our identities and sleeping in a different spot every night paying for these damn motels with credit cards we’re not sure who’s paying for them. Shit, we are still stealing. We literally are high class criminals.”
“I wouldn’t exactly say high class. Considering we don’t have a single penny, we’re more like, well, Walmart standard criminals.” Yoongi chews down on his last bite of burger, but nearly spits that out when Namjoon bursts out into loud laughter and he can’t help but join in.
“Listen,” Namjoon says after they’ve recovered from their laughing fit. “I know we’re fucking criminals and probably won’t end up in the same prison when they get us, but just know that there’s no one else on this planet I’d rather be a criminal with than you. I love you.”
When. That’s how they put it. It’s not if. Because an if would indicate that there’s a chance they’d never get caught, and that would be a lie. They know they’re done for eventually, they know they can’t run forever.
None of them would’ve thought this to be as big of a deal as it is now. They started small, Yoongi occasionally stealing some goods from the old people he worked for, and Namjoon cashing in some money from the work register. Hell, Yoongi can’t even remember the turning point, all he knows is that he suddenly owned a gun and held that to the temple of a crying woman as Namjoon collected the diamonds from the shop’s displays which the woman had unlocked seconds before.
And then they ran. With their faces on television and their names on everyone’s lips, they somehow manage to keep up their seemingly never-ending cycle of stealing, selling, buying, giving and hiding without leaving a single footprint behind. At least Yoongi is sure they’re being careful enough.
They talked about stopping, talked about just getting away and hiding somewhere they could grow old together, with their new identities, leaving all of this behind. If you’d ask them why they don’t just stop stealing, at least, neither of them would be able to give you an answer.
There’s definitely a too long silence between Namjoon’s words and Yoongi’s response. “I love you, too.”
“You were thinking.” Namjoon hands him the cup of coke, Yoongi gladly takes it.
He nods. “It’s a clusterfuck. Our entire situation. And we’re not stopping. Fuck, we just aren’t stopping. What the fuck.”
“God, I know.” Namjoon puts his hand on Yoongi’s that’s placed on the gearstick. “Are we meeting with Hoseok today?”
The older nods. “We need to meet him before we get out of Michigan, he’s on his way. Not gonna drive too far with a trunk full of shit.”
“Where are we headed next?”
“Illinois.” Yoongi takes a deep breath. “Let’s just rest for a few days. This constant moving is driving me insane.”
The other hums in agreement and they drive in silence for a while. This is why Yoongi loves Namjoon. He knows when to be silent. And he knows that silence doesn’t necessarily have to be uncomfortable. Sometimes he thinks it’s incredible how, with all of this shit going on, they’re able to keep up their love for each other. But no matter how much Yoongi feels like he’s dying inside, there is always that little flame inside him that is burning just for Namjoon.
They reach their stopover destination by twilight. The black Audi parked in front of the bar is giving away that Hoseok already arrived. As Yoongi shoots him a message to come outside, Namjoon is already walking around the car to retreat the duffel bag of goods from the trunk.
Their buyer doesn’t take long to come outside. He greets them with a giant smile on his face and approaches them in a fast pace. “Got everything?”
“Obviously.” Namjoon hands Hoseok the bag. “You can double check. As promised, no pictures, don’t want to risk someone fishing for us online.”
Hoseok takes the bag and shakes his head. “You guys have never disappointed me. What was it? Ten grand?” He reaches into the inside of his coat and proceeds to pull out a stack of money.
Why on earth he’d carry that amount with him just like that, Yoongi doesn’t know. But he takes the money and quickly hides it in the pocket of his sweater. “Not sure when we’ll be able to meet up next. We’re trying to take it slow for a little while.”
Hoseok hums. “You guys should keep some of that money for yourself, if you ask me. Maybe go on a little vacation or something. Don’t exactly know why you’re still keeping up with this.”
Namjoon huffs a laugh. “Neither do we.”
“I’d ask you to join me inside for a drink or two, but with all these stolen goods I’ve got here, I better get going.” Hoseok turns around on his heels, raising an arm as he tells his goodbye. “Be careful out there, boys.”
They watch him store the bag in his car and wait until he’s driven off before they turn to each other.
“Maybe he’s right”, Yoongi says. Upon Namjoon’s questioning look, he continues. “I’m not thinking about a vacation, but maybe we should at least have a proper dinner for once.”
Namjoon, without hesitation, nods. “God, please.”
They decide to stay at the bar after storing the majority of the money in their glove box. Yoongi has a steak, fries and salad and Namjoon chooses an actual, real burger, as he likes to describe it. Honestly though, no one can blame him after weeks of only eating from fast food chains. It doesn’t seem much to anyone else, but for the two of them it nearly feels like a feast.
As they eat, Yoongi can’t help but notice one of the staffs putting a colorful chain of lights on one of the walls. He looks at the younger, this time making sure to swallow the piece of steak before he speaks.
“It’s Christmas soon.”
Namjoon stops chewing mid-way and looks Yoongi dead in the eye. “And?”
“We’ve been on the run for over a year.”
That makes Namjoon put down his burger and lean back. His eyebrows furrow as he seems to think, eyes focusing on the table. After a long minute or so he looks back at Yoongi. “Fuck.”
Neither of them have realized until now how long it’s really been. It nearly seems like a miracle that they’ve made it this long without getting caught.
“We didn’t celebrate last year.” Yoongi returns to cutting apart his food.
“It’s pointless, isn’t it?” The other huffs a laugh. “We don’t believe in God.”
“But it’s Christmas.” Yoongi sighs. Fair enough, he doesn’t know why he suddenly feels like wanting to celebrate the holiday at least a little. He’s never been a big friend of Christmas, thinking that the only nice thing about it were the scents lingering in the air and the food his mother used to cook on Christmas Eve. He always hated the family dinners and the constant urge to get a present for literally anyone, no matter whether he’d only see them once a year or every day of his life.
This time, though, it feels different. He only has Namjoon now. And Namjoon only has him. The two of them are forced to spend Christmas together anyways, so they can at least celebrate it, no?
Namjoon, however, shakes his head. “Please, don’t.”
So, Yoongi doesn’t.
That night, they make it to Chicago. In the car, Namjoon has made sure to evenly split the money into ten smaller bundles so once they arrive, they can immediately start roaming a few neighborhoods to find the charity organizations they’d chosen beforehand, dropping the cash into the letterboxes.
In the beginning, they’d attached notes to the money with long texts. Nowadays, they only make sure the organizations know it’s a donation, so they save themselves the hassle of trying to figure out what they’re able to use the money for.
When they finally make it to a motel on the outskirts of town, it’s nearly five in the morning.
They don’t talk about Christmas again.
Both of them coming from California, obviously they have seen snow before, but it doesn’t exactly snow in most parts of their home state. Here in Maryland, there is more snow than they’ve encountered in the previous states. Yoongi and Namjoon have to figure that neither of them have proper clothes with them that could help them with this weather.
They decide to each buy a pair of boots and coats, anxiously making their way through the crowded city. Yoongi comes to figure that he’s completely lost track on time, so when he stands before one of the store fronts, he’s a little taken aback that Christmas is tomorrow. Or, well, Christmas Eve.
“Didn’t we meet up with Hoseok at the end of November?” He furrows his brows at Namjoon, who just nods. “How the fuck does time pass this quickly?”
The other chuckles. “Guess time is rushing when you’re on the run.” He grabs Yoongi’s arm and pulls him along with him, trying to get away from the crowd of people as quickly as possible. “Let’s get out of here. Too many people that could know our faces.”
Yoongi almost says something, but doesn’t get the chance to with the pace Namjoon is dragging him towards a side alley. He’d love to stay in the city some more, he’s pretty sure no one would recognize them, given the fact that these white people can barely tell one Asian from another. But Namjoon is right, they shouldn’t risk it.
They find a motel near the highway and Namjoon groans when he first sees the room interior. Yoongi can’t help but smile, it’s almost as though the younger is defeated.
There’s Christmas lights badly hung up across the walls, and in the middle of the room stands a generously decorated Christmas tree.
“They can’t be serious!” He throws the bag with his new belongings onto the bed. “Oh fuck, there even is fake snow sprayed onto the windows!”
Yoongi clears his throat, trying to keep himself from laughing. “It seems like the Universe wants you to grant me a wish.”
“We are not going to celebrate Christmas.” Upon seeing Yoongi’s face, Namjoon sighs. “Listen, I love you, and maybe I would celebrate with you if our situation wasn’t thoroughly fucked up. Like, what do you wish for as a present, huh? Mental stability and your real name back? Sorry, can’t give you that.”
“No”, Yoongi snaps back, “I just want to spend a nice night with a boyfriend as we haven’t had one in a while. Down some eggnog, give each other stupid, meaningless gifts, maybe watch that dumb football game, eat some good food and then have mind blowing sex. But it’s okay, we’re not celebrating Christmas, I guess.”
They don’t talk that night. It’s painfully quiet when Yoongi gets out of the shower to figure that Namjoon is fast asleep. He gets into bed, face towards the window, and can’t help thinking about how Christmas was like with his family. Yeah, he keeps telling himself he hated it, and maybe back then he really did hate it, but right now he’d die for a chance to spend the holidays with them. It’s the first time in over a year that Yoongi catches himself wishing his mum was here with him.
Maybe he should go into the city tomorrow and find one of those call boxes to give his mother a call. He remembers Namjoon’s words from a few weeks ago, when he said their parents think they’re dead. Do they really? Or are they just hoping for a life sign?
The next morning, Yoongi actually puts on his new boots and coats. Namjoon almost looks too silly with that much confusion written on his face.
“Where are we going?” He’s already on his way to get up from the tiny sofa.
Yoongi shakes his head. “I just quickly need to do something. You stay here. I’ll be back in an hour or so.”
On his way out, the cleaning lady wishes him a good morning and Yoongi salutes her. It takes a few tries to start the car - obviously, it’s cold and that damn thing is way too old - but once it finally does Yoongi drives further into the city, taking the vehicle through some of the streets hoping to find what he is looking for.
Eventually, he does. There’s a call box next to the parking lot of a small convenience store. He parks the car and walks over, scramming his pockets for a few loose coins to use. When he reaches for the earpiece, a rush of anxiety overcomes him.
Yoongi catches himself to think logically for a second. Him and Namjoon are literally wanted criminals who have been on the run for a year. When they’d left, their entire hometown was plastered with their faces, every television channel showed them on the news. They’d locked the borders to try and stop them from leaving the state - exactly one day too late, though. How could he be sure they’re not monitoring his parents’ phone line? If they are, they will be able to hear every word and in the worst case this call will allow them to trace him down.
He can’t risk that.
Yoongi drops his hand again. This was a stupid idea.
He turns around to face the convenience store. He’s already out here, so he might as well do some purchases. He nods at the store clerk who’s wearing a silly Santa hat, then walks down one of the aisles. He grabs a pack of beer and a few snacks along with some stuff Namjoon would definitely get if he were here with him, on his way to the cash register he makes sure to buy two postcards and stamps. If he can’t call his family, he might as well write to them, just this once.
For some reason, Yoongi doesn’t feel like returning to the motel yet. He makes sure to send Namjoon a message saying he needs some alone time before searching for a park nearby. He takes a stroll around the lake, then figures that it’s too cold to stay out here any longer and visits a coffee shop not too far away.
There he stays for a while, reading one of the books that laid on the table upon arriving, until it’s starting to get dark outside. He can’t even remember the last time he allowed his head to be this empty for hours, just focusing on words written on a page, letting his mind drift to other places.
Eventually, though, he does have to get back to the motel. When he steps inside the room, first thing he notices is that Namjoon seems to have plugged in all the lights again after unplugging them the night before. Then he spots the other sitting on the couch, looking dressed up? No, that can’t be right.
When Namjoon notices Yoongi’s presence, he jumps to his feet, crosses the distance between them and quickly put a kiss on the older’s lips.
“I’ve been thinking”, he says. “I think that I wasn’t considerate enough with you and I’m sorry for that. If you want to celebrate, I don’t mind doing so.”
Yoongi nearly tears up at those words and suddenly feels bad for being out for too long. “Are you sure?”
Namjoon nods and smiles, then quickly turns around to walk over to the coffee table. Yoongi just now notices that there seem to be plates wrapped into tin foil and two little packets wrapped in newspaper. Next to it are a bottle of eggnog and two glasses.
“I asked the owner where I could get a good Christmas dinner. She gave us some of the family’s own. They’re good people.” Namjoon smiles brightly. “Oh, and also eggnog. I couldn’t find beer for some reason, and you had the car, so, yeah.”
Yoongi seems to finally snap out of the shock, corners of his lips turning into a smile as he lifts up the grocery bag. “I got beer. And snacks.”
Namjoon excitedly claps upon hearing those words. “Amazing! Let’s watch the game, then!”
They both settle on the couch and start eating. Yoongi can’t remember the last time he had a home made meal, well, sort of. And he surely can’t remember the last time he’s seen Namjoon so talkative.
They talk about Christmas with their families and how hard it was for Namjoon’s dad to get used to American Christmas traditions after leaving South Korea. His dad hated the American way of celebrating until he got into football, so from then on all their Christmas dinners were built around that damn game.
“My family never had those issues”, Yoongi explains. “When they came from Korea, my mum and dad didn’t have enough money for an own stay, so they moved in with an American family, they taught them the traditions right away.”
They talk more, about relatives they’d only ever seen on Christmas and would get absolutely shitfaced from the eggnog, telling awkward stories nobody ever wanted to hear. So, when they finish eating Namjoon reaches for the bottle.
“Perfect time for some eggnog, don’t you think?” Yoongi forgot how much he hates but also loves the taste of eggnog, they both really don’t drink a lot of that stuff before switching to beer. “Before we watch the game, I want to give you your presents.”
Yoongi doesn’t know what on earth Namjoon could have possibly gotten him. But when he receives the first item, terribly wrapped in newspaper, he starts to feel incredibly warm. He tears the paper apart and swallows as a stack of CDs is revealed to him.
When they’d left, they had to leave everything behind, including Yoongi’s music collection which included a lot of his favorite CDs. In his hands, there are now three of those. All by Epik High.
“I was actually going to give them to you for your birthday. I found them in Colorado a few weeks ago. But given the fact that you wanted to celebrate Christmas and nobody knows how long we’re going to be able to keep this whole thing up, here you go.” Namjoon quickly reaches out to take the second package from the table, then hands that to Yoongi as well. “Open the other one.”
Yoongi is definitely tearing up as he carefully puts the CDs aside and takes the other package. It’s very small, and as he opens it it nearly slips out of his fingers. When a red box is revealed, he gasps. “Is that-“
“No, I bought it”, Namjoon interrupts him. “It’s none of the stuff we stole. Just open it.”
When Yoongi does, he finds a necklace inside the box, with a little, hexagonal locket attached to it. He immediately figures that it can be opened, so he retreats the necklace from the box and fumbles on the locket until the sides slide apart. Inside is room for two pictures.
On one side, there is a picture of Yoongi’s mother, he remembers that Namjoon took it the day they went to Disney World. On the other side is a picture of him and Namjoon, happily smiling into the camera, before all of this bullshit began. Namjoon is wearing his work uniform on the picture, Yoongi his usual, plain, black sweater. It was taken on Yoongi’s birthday last year.
“This is beautiful.” His voice is shaking when he speaks, that’s when he realizes he’s crying. “It’s really, really beautiful. Thank you.” He leans in to kiss Namjoon, then buries his head in the crook of the other’s neck.
“I thought that I should give you something you can keep to remember when we’re not together anymore.” Namjoon deeply inhales. “Like, we know this won’t be holding on forever, so, this way you can keep me with you. And your mother, too.”
Yoongi sniffs and eventually sits up straight again. “I got you something, too. It’s dumb and not as meaningful as your presents but, yeah, I got you something.”
He reaches into the grocery bag from earlier and takes out two rather badly-looking bags of chips. Well, they don’t exactly contain chips anymore, as Yoongi fed those to the ducks in the park. He used the bag to wrap up whatever he got Namjoon. The younger laughs as he sees Yoongi’s bad attempt at gift-wrapping.
He’s still laughing as he receives the bags from Yoongi, who can barely hold himself from joining in on Namjoon’s laughter, that is only getting louder when he is pulling out the first item - a book, to be precise - and looks at it thoroughly.
“Fair enough”, he wheezes out, “that’s not half as much grease on the pages as one might expect there would be.”
Yoongi snorts. “Listen, it’s all I got. Give me a break.”
Namjoon reads the back of the book for the summary. “It’s been so long since I read a book, fuck. This sounds good. Thank you.”
“Yeah, yeah, open the other one.” He impatiently shifts in his spot.
Namjoon reaches into the second bag and pulls out a small bottle, immediately starting to laugh again when he figures what it is. “So, you’re doing us both a favor, huh?” He looks at the bottle again. “You know, considering how you packed that gift, we could use the bottle itself to-“
“Shut up, oh my god.” Yoongi finally lets loose and starts laughing out loud. Fair enough, it wasn’t his best idea to wrap his gifts in empty chips bag. He’s lucky if the bottle of lube doesn’t slip out of Namjoon’s hands when he’s trying to use it. “It’s not a lot, but I didn’t expect you to change your mind.”
“It’s perfect. Perfect for me because I actually already have everything someone in a situation like me could have.” Namjoon smiles. “I got you.”
“Pf.” Yoongi grunts. “I’m a grumpy old man with severe anger issues.”
“But you’re my grumpy old man with severe anger issues.”
They watch exactly ten minutes of that stupid football game. They definitely don’t care about sports enough, and caring way too much about each other. Yoongi ends up straddling Namjoon’s lap even before anything interesting can happen on the television.
Now, with Yoongi harshly biting down on Namjoon’s bottom lip, the younger groans at the pressure on his crotch as Yoongi grinds down on him, hard.
It’s definitely been too long since the two of them had sex, which seems to be the main reason they’re so responsive to each other now, their movements harsh and frantic. To be fair, though, the two of them don’t really do soft. It’s always hard and loud and fast, leaving both of them dizzy when they’re done.
So it doesn’t come as a surprise when Yoongi looks up at Namjoon as he lays on his back, teary-eyed as the younger fucks his throat. It doesn’t come to a surprise when Yoongi fails to hold back on his loud moans, joining in on Namjoon’s to quickly fill the room even when there seems to be a passerby stopping at their window for a second, but passes on quickly. It doesn’t come as a surprise that with each smack Namjoon puts to Yoongi’s upper thigh, the older one whines out in pleasure, bucking his hips up.
Namjoon eventually pins Yoongi’s hands to the mattress just above his head, using just one hand, as his other arm is helping him find support on the surface. He thrusts inside him, hard, and Yoongi swears he can see the gates of heaven in front of his eyes as the other’s movements grow faster and every thrust seems to be sending a jolt through his entire body. He eventually comes untouched, harshly biting down on his bottom lip as he erupts on his stomach, moans turning into loud scream as Namjoon keeps fucking into him, chasing his own release now.
When the younger finally reaches his high, he needs to remove his hands from Yoongi’s wrists, leaving the other a chance to move his hands up to Namjoon’s nipples so he can pinch them, making his boyfriend tremble, barely capable of keeping his body up. Yoongi whines as Namjoon thrusts in a few more times, accompanied by loud moans, which probably leads their next door neighbor to put three loud bangs against the wall.
Eventually, Namjoon collapses on Yoongi, which seems a bit suffocating given the fact that the younger is much larger in body size. He doesn’t pull out yet, though, just bathes in the feeling of Yoongi’s fingertips running over the skin on his back ever so slightly.
He chuckles as Namjoon pulls out and rolls into the space next to him. “Merry Christmas, huh?”
Namjoon smiles at him. “Merry Christmas, love.”
They leave the state the next morning, knowing very well that families inside their homes are now celebrating Christmas properly, unwrapping gifts under the tree and spending the day with their families.
Yoongi looks at Namjoon. He is his family now.
He’d shown him the postcards before they left and they both wrote a little something for their families, deciding to drop the cards off at a letter box shortly before the state border.
Namjoon has said it last night. No one knows how long they are going to be able to keep this up. But for as long as they have each other, no matter how bad their situation might be, Yoongi is certain they can work their way through it.