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Existence Strikes Back!

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‘Where the fuck am I?’ You think to yourself as you lie in the bed of golden flowers. ‘Must be a dream.’ The feeling of dust sprinkles across your face. ‘Time to enjoy whatever is installed for me~~’ Your limbs go stiff while trying to stand. The beautiful bed of blossoms had your body’s imprint in it due to the amount of time you spent laying within the floral greenery.

‘Aww hell yeah an Undertale dream. Time to fuck some skeletons .’ The path was surprisingly compact and sturdy as if it had been tread on countless of times. ‘The attention to detail in this dream is top-fucking-notch.’ You look at the arc before entering the ‘friendliness pellet’ room, analysing the winged dot that overhung the three triangles. ‘Top-fucking-notch indeed, the Deltarune is even here.’ You may have played the game probably fourteen too many times so you are able to remember each detail. You enter the next room with a bit too much enthusiasm. There, like following a script, was the cute evil-ass flower you so dearly loved to read tentacle porn about. “Howdy, my name is-”

“Whoa hey, that’s not the right dialogue buddo! You’re meant to say “ Howdy! I’m FLOWEY!”, not this mellow bull crap.” You correct him to his usual dialogue. His face stays in its passive form but aggression can be heard through his cutesy voice.

“And here I thought there were no resets… yet. Someone ought to teach you some proper manners. I guess little me will have to do.” Your soul is tugged out of your body, almost making you fall over. You look at him surprised… for the wrong reasons. ‘He didn’t say “Ready? Here we go!” What is this improvisation…’ You admire the cartoonish-shaped heart, having a brown sheen- wait why is it like that?

“See that heart? That’s your soul, the very culmination of your being! Your soul starts off weak but-”

“Good job dream for following the right dialogue. Get the colour of my soul right next time though.” You rant to yourself while looking at the brown smudge. You turn and look at the passive-aggressive flower to see a barrage of ‘friendliness pellets’ flying at your soul. With an exaggerated duck, they fly over your head, your soul following the general movement of your body. “Whoa, buddy-chum-pal-friendo! Calm your farm.”

“You know what’s going on here, don’t you? You just wanted to see me suffer.” Flowey’s demeanour changes completely, the voice cackling with seething anger.

“Um, if weird white stuff was suddenly flung at you, wouldn’t you dodge it?” For once, you use your common sense.

“Fair enough.” A ring of floating ‘friendliness pellets’ appear out of nowhere, circling your body and soul in a hypnotising manner. “Die.” The laughter rings through your ears as the friendliness pellets encroached. ‘Can’t I just touch this and be okay?’ You remember the gameplay, reaching out to the ring of the suspicious white stuff before backing off.

“I’m not gonna get pregnant touching this right?” You joke around with the angry plant, making the ring stop.

“What?” he mutters.

“Nevermind.” You grin as a familiar flame appears next to the flower, pushing him out of sight and mind. 

“What a terrible creature, torturing such a poor youth…” The fabled goat mum steps out from the darkness, presented in her purple robe. ‘She got rid of the word innocent on purpose. Guess this dream is extra smart.’ You look over her towering figure, being at least two feet taller than you. “Do not be afraid. I am Toriel, caretaker of the Ruins. I pass through this place to see if anyone has fallen down. You are the first to come here for a long time. Come! I shall guide you through the catacombs.” Your brown soul is pushed back into your body and you look at her unceremoniously before following her path through another doorway decorated with the Deltarune. A wind blows past your body as you enter the purple brick room.

The shadow of the ruins looms above, filling you with DETERMINATION.

(Ruins - Entrance)

‘Intrusive thoughts much? And how fucking long is this dream?’ You read the sign to the next room. ‘Home. Wait, is that readable in the game? Ah, whatever.’ With a lazy lunge, you meet your first puzzle. 

“Welcome to your new home.” Toriel follows the usual dialogue with a soothing and patient voice, just lacking the world ‘innocent’ from her phrases, making you giggle at the awareness. “Allow me to educate you in the operations of the ruins.” She proceeds to step on the four switches before turning back to finish the point she was making. “The ruins are full of puzzles.”

“Ancient diversions as door keys.” You smugly say before she finishes her sentence. The look given to your response is… inquisitive.

“Yes, indeed… adjust yourself to the sight of them.” You hear the suspicion leaking into her voice but continue following anyways. ‘But who cares about that when I can look at the nearby sign!’ 

Only the fearless ones may proceed. Brave ones, foolish ones. Both walk not the middle road.

‘Just like the game.’

The next room is a long corridor with mini bridges over troughs of water. You hear her clear her throat to catch your attention. “To make progress, you will need to flip several switches. Do not worry, I have labelled the ones that you need to trigger.” She walks ahead, while you breathe the musty air in. ‘What an interesting dream.’ The sign usually within the game that tells you how to read isn’t present but the sign about staying on the path is visible. You walk over the cute bridge and casually flip the first switch. She gives a proud smile before presenting the next two switches, with one obviously marked. You give the one marked a hefty tug downward, hearing multiple gears grind as the spikes blocking the next room detract themselves.

“Splendid! I am proud of you, little one.” You cringe at being called little while she walks with a slight hop in her step, obviously happy. “Let us move to the next room.” And with an inward sigh, you let her lead you to the next puzzle. 

‘The dummy room.’ You think as she instructs you towards the plush doll. “Living in the underground, monsters may attack you. You will need to be prepared for this situation. However, worry not! The process is simple.”

“You want me to talk to them right?”

“Yes, exactly small one! You are very bright. Stall for time. I will come to resolve the conflict. Practice talking to the dummy.” She directs you forward with a hopeful glint in her eyes. ‘Might as well satisfy the goat mum.’ You tap the dummy in front of you and once again, the shit-coloured soul pops out of your body. ‘I’m never going to get used to this. Also what's this stupid music?’ 

The dummy stands absentmindedly. 

“Uhh, your cotton heart and button eyes make you the apple of my eye.” You try to remember the cute poem. ‘It doesn’t seem much for conversation, but at least Toriel looks satisfied.’

You WON! You earned 0 EXP and 0 gold.

Toriel pats your back. “Ah, very good! You are very good.”

“Thank you.” You say with confidence, earning a light chuckle from her as she departed the room.

“There is another puzzle in this room… I wonder if you can solve it?” She challenges you, in which you give an enthusiastic nod and proceed through the room- your brown soul initiates in a fight! 

Froggit attacks you! 

Music ensues as the Froggit approaches. ‘Oh shit, Froggit! Also why do I keep hearing weird music? This is from the game isn’t it? Wait I’m dreaming.’ You think to yourself.

“Hey babe, you lookin’ cute.” You give the monster a suggestive wink, a blush covering both your faces. ‘Let me wake up. This is too embarrassing.’ Froggit doesn’t understand what you said but was flattered anyway. Toriel looks back at you and the Froggit. If looks could kill, that Froggit would have been vaporised by that glare. It slinks off and the music dies out.

You WON! You earned 0 EXP and 0 gold.

‘Rip my boy.’ You continue down the path with Toriel checking you more often than looking forward. The corridor becomes narrower and the clue for the room is revealed on the nearby sign. 

“The first room is the second room’s blueprint.” You read out loud, Toriel giving a small nod before continuing on the path. ‘Nice job dream, you replaced the western room and eastern room with chronologically ordered statements.’ And then the spikes come into view. You give goat mum a ‘what the actual fuck’ look while she stops to explain. 

“This is the puzzle but… here, take my hand for a moment.” You grab the soft paw, letting her lead the way. “Puzzles seem a little too dangerous for now.” It was more than worrying looking at the sharp spikes retract and pop up again behind you. 

‘No shit Sherlock was that too dangerous,’ is all you think before heading to the ‘independence test’ room. 

“You have done excellently thus far. However… I have a difficult request to ask of you. I would like you to walk to the end of the room by yourself. Forgive me for this.” She finishes her monologue and dashes away. ‘Goat mum is a fast walker like damn.’ You walk at a leisurely pace until you pass the pillar, and as if following a script, she steps out of hiding.

“Greetings. Do not worry, I did not leave you.” She stops you before you fully exited the room.

“I know. You were behind the pillar.” You point out her measly hiding spot while deadpanning.

“Well, thank you for trusting me. However, now I must truly go so you will be alone for a while. Please remain here. I will give you a cell phone so you may contact me.” She hands over the phone that is around the size of a brick before muttering her signature line. 

“Be good, alright?”

“Of course.” You respond, making her nod with approval and she walks away. ‘TIME TO CAUSE TROUBLE!’