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If You Insist On Knowing My Bliss

Chapter Text

At first, it was an honest mistake; Brian had thought everyone had already left and was just looking for his necklace. The only problem was that Roger and John had thought the same thing, which is why the blonde had no problem playfully pushing his boyfriend up against the wall of the vacant dressing room. As things were heating up between the couple and clothes were being discarded to be forgotten on the floor, Brian was walking down the hall to unexpectedly interrupt the scene. Maybe it was just that Brian was too focused on finding his accessory that he simply ignored the muffled, questionable sounds coming from sliver of space where the door had been left open, or maybe there was some curious part of the guitarist that knew exactly what was happening and made a split decision to see who was in the room without even considering the consequences. 

The real reason didn't actually matter as Brian pushed the door open, producing an awfully loud creaking sound. Time seemed to stand still as everybody froze, the sound of the band's two youngest members heavy breathing being the only sound filling the tense atmosphere. Brian eyes flickered between Roger and John, the latter two, having turned their heads around to look at the guitarist, both staring back at him. John looked like a deer caught in headlights; but Brian couldn't really blame him, the shy bassist had been caught standing with his pants down and his boyfriend inside him by one of his best friends. Roger didn't seem as horrified, but Brian could tell there was a shift in his usual snarky confidence as he gripped onto the bassist's hips, seemingly trying to shift John's body to save him a little modesty. 

The moment really only lasted a few seconds, but for all three of them it felt more like an eternity. Brian, completely flustered, quickly turned on his heel and briskly walked back down the hallway. He wasn't sure which was worse; ruining the moment by walking in on two of his best friends having sex in their dressing room, or the fact that the image burned into his mind was making something inside him stir with arousal. The guitarist was so in his head trying to process what just happened that he almost didn't even register walking past their oldest member.

"Brian!" Freddie called, peeling himself away from his conversation with a roadie to walk with the tall guitarist. "Hey, I thought everyone had gone home."

"Me too," Brian sighed, not bothering to slow his pace. "But I'm certainly leaving now."

"Why?" Freddie questioned, trying to keep up with his much shorter legs. "Did something happen?"

"Just don't go in our dressing room," Brian mumbled. He barely heard Freddie's noise of confusion as he walked out the door into the warm summer air.

Despite Roger having driven all of them to the venue, Brian decided it was best to avoid confronting what had just happened by walking home. It took him over an hour and his feet ached by the time he reached his flat, feeling soaked in sweat and oppressed by the humid climate of the season. Once he finally made it inside, the air felt somehow even worse and more stiff inside his cheap, poorly ventilated flat. Brian went straight to his bed, plopping himself down on the soft sheets, not caring about how disgusting he was at the moment. 

All he wanted was to fall asleep and forget everything, but the event consumed more and more of his mind as he writhed around on the mattress. But it wasn't even what he saw that clouded his thoughts; it was actually the idea of what happened before he came in and the general notion of Roger and John being intimate. Brian knew it was wrong, that he shouldn't be thinking any sort of thoughts like that about his friends. He wanted to be disgusted at himself but the more his imagination ran wild, the more his pants grew tighter. The guitarist couldn't hold back any longer and reached down to unzip his trousers, but was abruptly interrupted by his phone ringing. 

"What?" Brian grunted into the phone, not even caring who was on the other end of the line. He had been confused and frustrated the whole night, and a mysterious caller at nearly three in the morning had almost completely set him off. 

"Oh don't be so cross with me," Freddie's elegant voice crackled over the phone. "I just wanted to check up on you, did you walk home?"

"Yeah," Brian sighed, lying back into the mattress.

"What the hell happened?" Freddie exclaimed. "You know you can tell me anything, Bri." His tone switch tugged at Brian's heart, remembering just how much the singer cared about him, and all of his friends for that matter.

"I know," Brian whispered, guilt creeping up on him once again. "But it's really not that big of a deal, Fred. You don't have to worry about me."

Freddie hummed on the other end of the line, clearly not buying the story. "Well I'm always going to worry about you. But I won't press you on it if you don't want to tell me. I better see you at band practice tomorrow, though."

"Of course," Brian smiled, forgetting his friend couldn't actually see him. "Goodnight, Freddie."

"Goodnight, get some sleep!" Brian could almost hear the cheeky grin as the line went silent. He put the phone back on the receiver and tried in earnest to actually fall asleep, the pale, twinkling stars in the sky peeking through the window providing him some sort of comfort.


Brian almost fell out of his bed at the shocking, boisterous knocking on his door. He scrambled to stand up, groaning at the bright sunlight filling his flat. As he stumbled unceremoniously into the hallway, the front door swung open to reveal the flamboyant singer standing in his doorway standing with his hands placed poignantly on his hips. 

"I know I said I'd back off, but you've seriously got me worried now," Freddie rambled, closing the door behind him and moving to sit on the small couch. "It's almost noon, you didn't answer any of my calls, you missed band practice and I'm not leaving until you tell me what's wrong."

Brian sighed, looking up at the ceiling and debating telling Freddie everything, still standing in the hallway. The singer cleared his throat to gain the curly-haired man's attention and patted the spot next to him on the couch. The guitarist let out a loud sigh, and begrudgingly moved to curl up on himself on the couch. His friend stayed silent, giving Brian the opportunity to start the conversation. Brian buried his head in his hands with his elbows propped up on his knees before finally admitting, "Last night I walked in on Roger and John, doing you know...and I think I want to sleep with both of them."

The silence after his statement was almost deafening, and Brian was sure he'd never felt more embarrassed. As the seconds passed on with no response from his best friend, he was convinced Freddie was simply thinking about how to find a replacement after kicking him out of the band. He was about to speak up and try to dig himself out the whole he'd put himself in when the singer gently placed a hand on his shoulder. "Brian, I didn't even know you were into men," his voice seemed quieter than Brian had ever heard it. 

"I didn't either," he confessed. "But I can't stop thinking about it, thinking about them...together. And adding myself to the equation."

"As much as I'd love to help you with this," Freddie sighed, "I think the only thing to do is tell them."

Brian's head shot up at the suggestion, giving Freddie a bewildered look. "Are you absolutely mad? They'll never want to see my face again if I tell them. What could even say? 'Hey, I saw you guys fucking and now I wanna join in on the fun'?"

"Well if it's affecting you this much, you've got to do something! And we've both known Roger long enough to know that he'd never be that upset with you," Freddie replied, trying to sound as reasonable as possible. 

"What about John?" Brian retorted, deflating back into the couch and crossing his arms. "He looked humiliated when I walked in, I'm not even sure I can face him without bringing up my feelings."

Freddie seemed to have an epiphany and Brian felt nervous at the grin that spread across his face. Before the guitarist had time to assume what his friend was thinking, Freddie bolted from the couch to the phone on the wall. Brian watched in horror as the singer hastily punched in a number they both knew all too well. He finally got his wits and stood up as Freddie smiled at the crackly voice coming through the speaker. 

"Roger?" Freddie quipped, staring at Brian as the tall man now loomed over him. "Brian would like to talk to you." Freddie handed Brian the phone, quickly scurrying towards the door. "Sorry, Bri, I had to do it!" He shouted over his shoulder as he hurriedly exited the flat.

Brian inwardly cursed at the oldest member of their group, knowing it had to happen but upset that his friend had decided to put it in motion for him. He shakily brought the phone to his ear, biting his lip and hoping he'd still have any friends after this.

" Brian? "

Chapter Text

" Roger ?"

The blonde felt a wave of nervousness at hearing the familiar voice, nobody had heard from the guitarist except Freddie and he wasn't sure where their friendship stood after the awkward encounter the night before. "Yeah, it's me...Fred said you wanted to talk?"

The other line went almost completely silent once again, and Roger was sure Brian had hung up until he heard a quiet sigh. "Uh...yeah, yes. Fred said I wanted to talk." The drummer could sense the hesitation in his friend's voice, something usually never present with his generally calm demeanor.

"But do you want to talk?" Roger responded, twirling the phone cord in his free hand. During another muted pause, Roger could hear John's faint footsteps pattering down his hall before the young bassist appeared in the doorway to his bedroom. The blonde raised his eyebrows from his half-seated position on his mattress at the sight of his boyfriend clad in only a thin towel and received John sticking his tongue out at him as he walked over to the wardrobe in return. There was a faint response over the line, but Roger was too distracted by getting a glimpse of John's backside as he discarded the towel and slipped on his boxers to comprehend what was said. "Sorry, what was that?" Roger asked, staring up at the ceiling to restrain himself from any further diversions. 

John didn't make that easy, though, as he positioned himself on the bed to curl right up onto Roger's side and drape an arm over the drummer's stomach. He even innocently tangled their legs together, causing the blonde to hold back a reaction at the contact due to the fact that he wasn't any more dressed than his partner. The bassist lazily listened to the murmured sounds coming from the phone but didn't really care what was being said or even who was talking as the weight of the stuffy, summer day settled over him. "Yeah, sounds good. We'll see you then," Roger said with a faint smile as he set the phone back down on the receiver.

"Who were you talking to?" John mumbled into the older man's side, his eyes now softly shut. Roger slid down to lie next to his partner, turning on his side so they were facing each other. John shuffled closer to Roger now that he had a proper chance of pressing himself up against the other man, eliciting a displeased groan from the drummer.

"Isn't it too hot to cuddle like this?" Roger criticized while bringing an arm up to rest on John's side.

"I should be the one whinging," John retorted. "You're drenched in sweat."

"You know you love it," the blonde remarked. "And you're the one who sidled up to me."

"I most certainly do not love it," John giggled, slowly opening his eyes to see the small smirk on his lover's face. "And you still haven't answered my question."

"Oh yeah, it was Brian." Before the drummer had time to continue, he was stopped by the way John's eyes flickered up to his and a deep blush presented itself on his pale cheeks. "He just wants to talk, Deaky," Roger reassured, reaching up to tuck a piece of John's hair behind his ear. The pair themselves hadn't really spoken of the situation either, opting to simply forget it for the moment and deal with it when necessary. "I told you don't have to be embarrassed, Brian's one of our best friends and it's not like he doesn't know we have sex."

"Well you weren't the one with a cock inside you when he walked in," John answered with a preceding eye roll. 

"I let you top all the time, you were the one who asked to bottom yesterday," Roger responded with a cynical grin.

"You're such an arse," John smiled back, lightly smacking the drummer on the chest. "And anyways, that's not what I'm really embarrassed about."

"Oh?" Roger quipped, gently moving his hand up and down John's side. 

"Just...nevermind," John bit his lip and cast his gaze down to Roger's shoulder. "It's nothing."

"It's obviously something if you brought it up in the first place," the blonde said as he delicately pinched John's side.

John begrudgingly looked back up to meet Roger's gaze and sighed, "Promise you won't think I'm weird?"

"You? Weird? Never," Roger laughed, earning him another hit to the chest, this time with a little more force.

"I'm being serious!" John whined.

"Okay, I'm sorry," Roger apologized with a quick kiss to John's lips. "Now what could it be? You secretly liked Brian walking in and seeing me pounding into you ?" 

Even though it was only an innocent joke, John wished the ground would open up and swallow him whole. His feelings must have been plastered in his expression as the words came out of Roger's mouth, because the drummer's face fell as he realised his wisecrack couldn't have been any closer to the truth. The bassist hid his face in his hands and rolled onto his back, wanting to take everything back and take his secret to his grave. "Oh God, I shouldn't have brought it up," the brunette mumbled into his palms clasped over his mouth. Roger clicked his tongue and sat up next to John's head and slowly pulled the latter's hands away from his face. The younger man shamefully looked up at his partner, surprised to find a look that could almost be described as admiration in his eyes. "Are you gonna say anything?" John quietly asked, feeling incredibly small despite physically being slightly bigger than the other man. 

"Deaky," Roger sighed, bringing a hand up to gently cup his lover's face, "I'm not even sure what to say."

John let out a small, ashamed whine at Roger's response. "You probably think I'm disgusting now."

"Disgusting?" Roger asked, a puzzled look on his face. "I think it's actually kinda hot." The drummer could feel his partner's cheeks heat up at his explanation and moved to straddle the younger man, bracketing his legs just above John's hips. "Mr. Deacon, my little minx in disguise."

John laughed at the words, placing his hands on Roger's hips and looking up at him with a grin. "Do you think we should tell Brian?"

"Hm, well he wants to talk this afternoon. If it comes up, I'd love to see the look on his face if we tell him," Roger smiled, leaning down to press his lips firmly against John's. The kiss easily gained intensity and Roger slid his hips backwards to brush his arse against John's semi-hard cock. 

The brunette pulled away from the kiss to gasp at the friction, his hands tightening on the older man's hips. "As much as I'd love to continue this, I literally just took a shower."

"Please, I'll do all the work," Roger groused. "You won't even get that messy...most likely."

"You're insatiable, Rog."

"Oh come on," the blonde beamed. "Admit it, you love it."

"I think I've done enough admitting for today."

Chapter Text

Brian groaned as he looked at himself in the mirror, disappointed with the outfit he picked out. He walked back to his wardrobe, resting his head against the cool wood and gently closing eyes. Why do I even care what my outfit looks like? It's only Roger and John...but now I'm gonna be telling them that watching them getting it on turns me on. What kind of a friend even am I? They're happily in a relationship and here I come, trying to get in the middle of it; they're probably going to exile me from the band and all our friendships after this. As Brian's inner turmoil raged on, the clock ticked in its persistent, timely manner, reminding the guitarist it was almost time to seal his fate. After telling his friends what he really felt, there'd be no turning back; whether the result be positive or not, there certainly would be a shift in their dynamic. 

Before he ran out of time, Brian straightened up and cleared his throat, determined to employ his usual level-headed persona to deal with the situation. He let out a loud sigh to nobody as he picked the final outfit: a tight tank top and his nicest pair of high-waisted trousers. As the time to leave for Roger's flat approached, the minutes seemed to pass by faster than ever. Brian gave himself one last glance over in his mirror before grabbing his keys and walking out the door to face his uncertain future.


John paced back and forth in front of the sofa, biting his nails as the anticipation ate at his insides. "What if he doesn't even come?"

"Wouldn't you be okay with that? I thought you were nervous about possibly telling him," Roger sighed, crossing his arms and leaning back impossibly further into the couch. His partner stopped in front of him with a disapproving look and the drummer raised his arms in a shrug.

"I was nervous but I've been thinking about it all day and…" John started but trailed off, a slight blush making its way on his cheeks. 

"And what?" Roger pressed with a knowing smirk.

"And I'm sure it won't come up so there's nothing to worry about," John retorted with his own less convincing lip curl.

"Really?" Roger's grin grew impossibly wider as he stood up to stand essentially chest-to-chest with his partner. "Are you sure you weren't just thinking of the possibility of Brian joining us in the bedroom?" His voice dropped as he started his dirty talk, placing his hands gingerly on the brunette's chest. "Our best friend watching as I pound you into the mattress?"

"Who said I'd be the one bottoming?" John shakily piped up, the effect of the drummer's words evident in his tone.

"My bad," Roger faintly laughed, a tinge of mischeviousness clear in his voice, "maybe it was Brian fucking both of us as we-"

The litany of filth spewing from the blonde's mouth that had his younger boyfriend hot in the face was abruptly stopped a sharp knock on the front door. Roger groaned and leaned forward to rest his forehead on John's shoulder as the situation that had just started to build up easily dissipated. "That's the second day in a row we've gotten interrupted," the blonde complained and lifted his head to pout at his lover. 

John softly laughed, giving the drummer a chaste kiss on the lips. "Well at least we didn't get as far this time. Why don't you go answer the door and I'll start the kettle." The blonde grumbled something incoherent in response, stealing another kiss before finally pulling away to answer the second, more impatient knocking sound on his door. 

As the door swung open, the underlying discomfort between the two friends made itself known. Roger wasn't that torn about the whole situation, he truly hadn't been from the start, but seeing Brian standing at his door looking like a mess made something stir inside of him; the blonde wanted to feel bad but something told him that there was something more bothering the guitarist than simply walking in on him and John the night before. "Brian," the drummer plastered on a simple smile to greet his friend, "it's nice to see you. Missed you at practice this morning."

"Yeah, sorry about that," Brian softly answered. The blonde could sense the hesitation in the guitarist and tried his best to act as normal as possible.

"Well come on in," Roger laughed, stepping to the side. "Unless you're planning on standing in the hallway all night."

Brian answered the gesture with a tiny smile and made his way into the flat, a familiar place he'd been a million times before. The group had always loved hanging out at Roger's place, even with the cramped proximity it always felt homey and safe to all the boys. For the first time in a while as the guitarist nervously sat on the armchair adjacent to the couch, he took in his surroundings. The knickknacks and clothes purposefully strewn about all spoke to the drummer's rigid and strong personality, but it was the neat pile of records and small tool kit placed near an end-table that caught his eye. It tugged at Brian's heart to see John's belongings perfectly intermingled with Roger's and reminded him of how horribly this whole conversation could go; this could even potentially ruin the band if his friends felt a certain way about the guitarist's true desires. Before he could spiral into all the possibilities again, he was brought back to the real world by Roger plopping down onto the sofa and John joining him just seconds after.

"Hi, John," Brian quietly spoke, only daring to look their youngest member in the eye for a split second.

"Hey, Bri," John replied just as softly. The nickname surprised the guitarist; he took it as a sign that things maybe weren't so bad, but then again he still hadn't told the bassist his true intentions. 

Just as it had on the phone, a troublesome silence fell over the three friends. Roger shifted uncomfortably in his seat and decided to obnoxiously clear his throat to break the tension. "Let's just get on with it, I can't stand this dynamic anymore." He had started the conversation that all of them, for their own reasons mostly unbenounced to each other, were scared to bring up.

"Right," Brian continued, sitting up in the chair. "I just wanted to apologize in person for what happened yesterday, it was completely an accident."

"I think we already know that," Roger interjected. 

"It's not that big of a deal," John added, causing Brian's gaze to shift over to the brunette. "Of course I was embarrassed but we're not upset about it. I hope it hasn't changed your opinion of me or Rog." The bassist looked to the floor as he finished his statement, a faint blush painted on his cheeks once again that day. 

"No, no, of course not," Brian quickly responded, looking between the pair. "I was actually more worried you guys would change your opinion on me."

Roger turned his head to give the guitarist a confused look and Brian knew in that moment he'd have to lay it all out on the line, and it was nobody's fault except his. "Why would you think that?" The blonde innocently asked and Brian thickly swallowed as two pairs of eyes focused on him. Before he could answer the question, the whistle from the kettle interrupted the conversation. John excused himself and briskly walked into the kitchen, leaving the guitarist and drummer to settle into the original awkwardness that loomed over the living room. 

"I haven't told you everything," Brian whispered so quietly that Roger didn't even register the words. Even when he did, the blonde couldn't verbally respond as his mind tried to guess what his friend's words ultimately meant. John shuffled back into the room, setting the mugs on the table and sinking back into his spot on the sofa. The two youngest men returned their gazes to the guitarist, clearly waiting for him to explain. 

"I guess I'll just have to say it," Brian sighed, not able to look up from a suddenly very interesting spot on the floor. "You're probably gonna exile me from the band and kick me out of your flat after saying this, but…"

"It can't be that bad, Brian," the blonde impeded his friend's admission by piping up again, having no filter or regard for the weight of the situation to the guitarist. "Let me guess, you're suddenly gay and can't stop thinking about shagging your band mates?"

Everyone in the room could tell by Brian's reaction to the poorly timed jab that the drummer's sarcastic remark had given away another secret. John gave his boyfriend a pointed look that suggested that he should stop his guessing shenanigans from this point forward before his sight shifted to look at the emotionally wrecked guitarist who had taken to biting his nails while still staring at the floor, his face a deep shade of red the bassist had never seen before.

"That's funny," John started, directed towards Brian, surprising both of the other men. "I couldn't stop thinking about you shagging us, either." 

Brian suddenly looked up, clearly shocked by John's response. "W-what?"

"You can't blame us, Bri," Roger chimed in. "I mean, just look at you."

The guitarist ignored the semi-compliment, his brain still focused on the sudden turn of conversation when he was convinced just an hour ago that he'd be packing his bags to move out of town and start a new life out of sheer embarrassment. "But you're not freaked out by this? You guys are in a committed relationship and I just confessed to wanting to get in the middle of that."

"I don't think it'd be getting in the middle of anything," John replied, his gaze quickly shifting between his bandmates. "Not if we're all into it, that is."

"Wait, since when were you even into men?" Roger sincerely questioned.

"I...I'm not sure, that's one of the reasons I was hesitant to bring any of this up. But seeing you two peaked some sort of curiosity inside me and I haven't been able to stop thinking about it," Brian rambled on. "I don't even know if I'd enjoy it but…" he slowly trailed off, the nerves consuming his thoughts again.

Roger and John shared a look that Brian couldn't really decipher, but the mischievous smiles that grew on their faces gave him a hint as to what they were thinking. "Well, there's only one way to find out if you'd like it," Roger suggested, slightly raising his eyebrows to match his smirk. 

"Are you really suggesting we have a threesome?" Brian asked, overwhelmed with the possibilities now presented to him. The pair eagerly nodded, causing the guitarist to let out a laugh of disbelief. "What if I don't like it? Or I don't know what to do and it's just horrible for everybody?"

John smiled before trying to reassure the curly-haired man whose mind was clearly thinking too hard, "I have a suggestion; think about what you really want and if you're willing to give this a try, we'll be right here tomorrow night." 

"And if I don't come?" Brian shakily asked.

"Then you don't...and we'll forget any of this ever happened," John replied and Roger nodded in agreement, obviously pleased with his boyfriend's solution.

"And if I do show up?" Brian asked with even less strength in his tone. 

"We'll start simple," Roger answered this time. "We won't make you do anything crazy or something you're not into. It doesn't have to be much different than what you're used to, and we both sort of look like birds, anyways." The blonde's last comment got a small laugh out of everyone, the discomfort finally seeming to diminish between them now that everything was out in the open. John even reached for one of the forgotten teacups, grimacing after he took a sip at how cold the drink had gone.

"Alright," Brian sighed, this time out of relief. "Sounds like a plan." 

Almost miraculously, the situation had been settled. The three men spent the rest of the night falling into normal conversation, as if they hadn't agreed to possibly have a three-way the next day; they talked just like the old friends that they were, discussing the band and other various topics relevant to their now busier adult lives. Brian soon grew tired, though, mostly because of his lack of sleep the night prior and at some point resentfully excused himself to go home. They said cordial goodbyes and Roger walked him to the door as John cleaned up in the living room. Just as the guitarist crossed the threshold to leave, the blonde caught his attention to say one last thing.

"Oh, Brian?"

"Yeah?" The tall man stopped walking to look over his shoulder.

"In the bedroom, John isn't as shy as you might think he is." The statement was finished with a wink and just as fast as Brian could comprehend the sentence, the door was softly shut behind him.

Chapter Text

If Brian thought the persistent ticking of time leading up to his initial conversation with Roger and John annoyed him, it was nothing compared to the day of the potential threesome. His mood was definitely improved, both the ease of the conversation and the full night of sleep he finally achieved giving him more clarity on the situation at hand. That didn’t mean he still wasn’t torn up about it; the sudden attraction to other men, two of his best friends nonetheless, still a confusing feeling. Amazingly, his younger bandmates nonchalant attitudes about the whole thing gave him some ease and allowed him to give less weight to the possible negative effects to come from this. 

His back and forth thoughts about actually going through with it waged a war in his mind the entire day. The guitarist decided to call Freddie to seek out some advice without revealing his entire feelings on the case. He breathed a sigh of relief when the singer’s voice came to life over the line, scared that he wouldn’t be home to pick up the phone.

Brian? Have you finally sorted everything out? ” Brian wasn’t surprised at the immediate questioning, the oldest member of the group always knew what was going on in some way or another.

“Yeah, I guess you could say that,” Brian timidly replied.

So? ” Freddie continued, his excitement clear over the phone. “ What did you agree on?

The guitarist sighed, knowing he wouldn’t be able to hide anything no matter how hard he tried. “They...offered to have a threesome with me.”

Brian could tell the phone had slipped from the singer’s grip by the distant shriek over the line. “ Bri, I don’t even know how to feel right now! I mean, wow, I’m glad for you three but I’m honestly a little jealous. I always thought I was the mad one of the group when it came to relations.

“Aren’t you with Mary?” Brian laughed, slightly confused by Freddie’s reaction.

Yes, but let’s not talk about that now, you just told me you’re going to have a three-way with our bandmates.

“Well I actually wanted to call you about that, I’m not sure if I’m going to.”

I think you should, dear ” his friend cooed. “ What have you got to lose? Have some fun and explore yourself, you know deep down you want to .” Before Brian could reply, Freddie sighed loudly over the line. “ Speaking of Mary, I’ve got to go, darling. She has a date planned for us and is insisting we be early for some unknown reason .”

“Alright, Fred, goodbye.” The guitarist hung up the phone and contemplated the singer’s wise words, making his mind fog again. Ultimately, Brian decided to leave his flat once the sun had set on another day of scorching, unbearable weather. His mind continued to race, never ceasing to weigh both options until he actually reached Roger’s flat. He sealed his fate once again, raising his hand to knock on the dark wood, hoping it would turn out as positively as the day  before when he went headlong into the situation.

Roger's smile was possibly the most devious thing the guitarist had ever seen as the door swung open. "Brian, we were starting to think you wouldn't show," the blonde grinned, stepping to the side.  

"Well, if I'm being completely honest," Brian admitted, walking into the flat, "I'm still a tad nervous about all of this."

"Oh no, I don't want to hear any of that," a disappointed voice called from the hallway before John's slim frame emerged into the living room. "We're either doing this or not, Brian. I don't want any regrets or strained friendships at the end of this." The bassist punctuated his remark by sassily placing his hands on his hips. 

"It's not that, Deaky," the guitarist sighed, slipping his own hands into his trouser pockets. "I just feel apprehensive because I'm so...inexperienced compared to you guys."

"You just need to relax," Roger chimed in. Brian looked between the two men, nervously gulping as the blonde walked towards him while grabbing his partner's hand to coax the brunette into standing at the guitarist's other side. "We'll show you anything and everything if you'll just let us." His sentence was accentuated by his hand coming up to gently play with the collar of Brian's shirt. John seemed to catch his boyfriend's drift and fiddled with the undone top buttons on the oldest man's shirt, his hand barely brushing the exposed skin already there.

"A-alright," Brian breathed, embarrassed at how his pants already started to tighten at the simple contact. "Can I kiss you?" He directed the question towards John and felt his face heat up at the way the younger man smiled up at him. 

"Of course," John lightly laughed. Brian wrapped his arm around the brunette's waist and pulled him closer, connecting their lips in a shy kiss. The blonde contentedly gazed at the spectacle in front of him, resting his head on Brian's shoulder while leaving his hand in its original position. Barriers appeared to be breaking down between the most conserved members of the group as their bodies and lips pressed together. Brian could feel the drummer's warm, labored breath tickle his neck while John finally gave up dominance and parted his lips, allowing Brian to slide his tongue into his mouth. A high-pitched moan from Roger finally broke them apart, the guitarist looking down to see John's free hand resting against the bulge in the blonde's trousers. 

The oldest man tore his eyes from the sight to look at Roger's face, the drummer answering his plea without Brian even having to say it. "You don't have to ask me," he smiled, surging forward to get his own taste of their friend. Brian noted that the drummer was much more rough than his boyfriend, not necessarily in a bad way but certainly lacking the hesitancy he shared with John. The blonde ravished his mouth with fervor, giving Brian no choice but to let him take control. In a bold, haste fashion, Brian moved his other arm to grab at Roger's arse and earned a moan from the blonde against his lips. 

Roger hesitantly pulled away and smirked, looking between his two current partners. "Why don't we take this somewhere more comfortable?" The other two eagerly nodded, the trio practically tripping over each other as they rushed to the bedroom. Brian had to laugh at himself and the situation, surprised at how easily he let his bandmates take his guard down.

The humor was hastily replaced with overwhelming arousal as John pressed him up against the closed door once they all made it into the small room, their bodies taking up most of the free space amongst the crowding furniture. “So how do you want to start this?” The brunette asked, his eyes meeting Brian’s in an endearing gaze while their faces remained separated by only the tiniest amount of space. The guitarist struggled to answer, too caught up in staring into John’s lust-blown pupils to formulate a coherent response.  

John could tell his curly-haired friend was lost in his own mind and decided to answer himself instead, not wanting to wait any longer to get the action started. “How about we suck you off?” The grin that followed his suggestion was the slyest thing Brian had ever seen from the usually shy youngest member of the group. 

We ?” Brian questioned, his head starting to spin at the thought. 

“What did I tell you, Bri?” The blonde piped up, walking closer to the other two and coming into Brian’s field of vision to stand slightly behind John.

“What did you tell him, Rog?” John asked, turning towards his boyfriend with a touch of curiosity and annoyance laced in his voice.

“Oh, it’s...nothing,” Roger sheepishly replied, obviously embarrassed at the confrontation. “Just about how much I love you?” The way his voice raised in pitch as he finished his sentence that turned it into more of a question rather than fact made it obvious to the bassist that he was lying. 

John rolled his eyes, not wanting to currently deal with the remark, before returning his attention to Brian. “What do you say?” He energetically asked, hands coming to rest just above the waistband of the guitarist’s trousers. “Come on, I’m practically begging you to let us get on our knees for you.”

“Yeah, that sounds great and all but what am I supposed to-”

“Stop overthinking, Brian,” Roger scolded, stepping closer to gently grasp the fabric of his shirt where the buttons had already been separated as John sank to the ground with his hands beginning to work at Brian’s belt buckle. “Just let us do everything.”  The guitarist merely nodded as the blonde fully unbuttoned his shirt for him before joining John on the ground, the pair handling the task of pulling his trousers and pants down with ease. 

A loud gasp escaped his mouth as Roger enveloped his hand around Brian’s length, giving him a few rough strokes before taking the tip into his mouth. He struggled to keep his hips still as Roger began to bob his head and John kept his hand grasped around what the blonde had yet to swallow. Brian let his eyes slip shut and his short nails scratched at the wooden door, looking for some sort of purchase. The feeling of pleasure dipped when the contact was promptly taken away and Brian opened his eyes to look down, letting out a small whine before John’s lips promptly wrapped around his cock and Roger’s hand came to rest on the guitarist’s thigh. A string of curse words and nonsense tumbled out of the oldest man’s mouth as the brunette immediately took down more than his boyfriend had and looked up at Brian, the innocence in his eyes contrasting with their current situation. As the act continued, Brian’s knees almost buckled each time the two men at his feet continuously switched positions, both taking his cock further down their throats as the minutes passed. 

At one point, Roger and John shared an unreadable look before they both licked a stripe up the sides his length, their tongues obscenely gliding against each other. Brian groaned and threw his head back at the sight while the two younger men continued repeating the movement. The guitarist felt dangerously close to his release, desperately holding back as he watched Roger and John slide their tongues off his cock to lewdly make-out while still kneeling in front of him. The young brunette eventually pulled away from his boyfriend to give his attention back to Brian, but was stopped by the tallest man shaking his head. John gave him a quizzical look, sitting back on his heels, before Brian explained, “I’m gonna finish too early if you keep doing that.”

“Suit yourself,” Roger laughed, wiping the corner of his mouth where some spit had dripped down. 

John mischievously looked over to the bed before grinning up at the guitarist dominating over him, only in height. “Why don’t we get to the real fun, then?”