'...So, in conclusion, my mother was a lot of things- she was nurturing and kind, ruthless in her good judgment, and fierce in her protectiveness over her patients. It didn’t matter if it was a three-year-old with leukemia, or a murderer who got beat half to death in a prison ward. A patient was a patient, and she was always there to fight for them, until her last breath.
Suicide didn’t take my mother’s life- terminal cancer did. And that is why I believe it is important to mention that patients with a terminal diagnosis should have, in this state- and in every state- the right to a humane, ethical and painless end to their suffering. My mother’s exit was in effect an exercise of her own right to choose her end.
As grieved as I am that my mother is no longer here, I respect that choice. As a physician, she knew the path that her cancer would take. And I, for one, am thankful that my last moments with her were happy ones, filled with her coherent and peace-filled words of wisdom.
As my mother requested, in lieu of flowers, please consider donating to Death with Dignity and signing the letter to our local representative during the meal that will follow this service. My mother would have greatly appreciated such a wonderful act of compassion from all of you. Thank you, and be blessed.'
As Clarke watched the cursor on the computer screen disappear and reappear, she sighed. That would have to be good enough...
Writing, even for a professional writer and artist, wasn’t always easy. Especially when the material was about one’s own mother, and the fact that she ended her own life in an effort to stage one last protest. What had hurt Clarke wasn’t that she did it, it was that she didn’t tell her that brunch over a week ago would be the last time she saw her mother alive. She didn’t tell her that she had been sick for years... no, she left it all in a letter, with one last wish-
That she herself get tested for the same gene that caused her mother’s aggressive and terminal uterine cancer.
Setting her computer to the side, Clarke pulled out her cigarettes. For Clarke, the act of writing was a great purge. And after any release, she loved to top it off with a little nicotine. One last pack- then she’d quit. As she lit it, she heard her front door open and close. Taking a deep breath, she let herself enjoy this before the impending attempted guilt trip on the part of her best friend.
“Seriously?” A familiar voice followed the sound of her sliding glass door, “your mother had cancer, Clarke, you might have the same gene. And you’re smoking?”
“First off, do have ... I do have the same gene, at least according to the geneticist I met with... and second, this is why you’re a doctor, and I’m a writer, Bellamy,” she answered cheekily, taking a long drag as he stepped out and sat next to her. As she looked over him in his black suit, Clarke noted that the look did him a lot of favors. If it weren’t her own mother’s funeral today, and if she was allowed to be drunk out of her mind, she could see herself trying to get him to fuck her in the bathroom of Kane’s house.
But- as much as she loved looking at him- she and Bellamy were best friends... so that wasn’t happening anytime soon.
“and this,” he said, pulling the cigarette out of her hand carefully, and putting it out on the pack, “is why I’m your person- no more cigarettes, Clarke.”
“God, you’re lucky I love you,” she sighed dryly, rolling her eyes.
“Yeah, I am,” he nodded, his eyes falling to his hands, before catching sight of her bunny slippers through the glass table. As his eyes snapped up at her, she gave him a toothy grin, “are you going to get ready? Or are you wearing the bunny get up to your mother’s service?”
Remembering the matching robe, Clarke let out a tiny giggle, of course, she wasn’t going to, “don’t tempt me,” she teased, “I’m gonna get ready... read my speech, and tell me it’s wonderful?”
“What if it’s not?” Bellamy asked, pulling her laptop toward himself, “like what if it’s worse than your unedited fictional biography of a rabid raccoon?”
“Okay, that was a comedic piece, and you know it!” Clarke warned, turning at the door, “if it’s bad though, just lie pretty to me? It’s too late to rewrite it.”
“I gotcha,” he said, smiling softly, “I’ll lay it on thick. Now, go shower and I’ll read this.”
“Thanks, Bell,” Clarke murmured thoughtfully, “for everything.”
“Of course,” he said, smiling lightly, before peering at her speech.
As Clarke stood under the spray of the shower, she thought back to the first time she met Bellamy.
He had been knocking on the door of her studio apartment like a mad man. When she opened it to find a rather handsome man with earnest brown eyes and curls to match staring back at her- wearing scrubs from her mother’s hospital, she couldn’t help but crack a joke.
“Sorry, no one ordered a stripper,” she said, giggling and taking another drink of vodka out of the bottle, it was her birthday after all.
Despite his earnest nature, the man let out a little huff of a laugh, “I- I’m not. My name’s Bellamy... Your mom sent me. She said you don’t have a license and you can’t drive to the hospital? But she needs you to get there right away... it’s your father.”
“Fuck,” Clarke felt her world tilt on its axis, the one person who still cared about her- who loved her and was patient with her while she had gone down her dark spiral was hurt, “What happened?”
As she grabbed her stuff, Bellamy was rather silent, giving nothing away- that is, until she asked if her dad was still alive. Running his hand through his hair, the man let out a sigh, “I guess, it’s better to hear from a stranger,” he muttered, looking exasperated, “he’s barely alive. They’re keeping him alive so you can say goodbye... I’m sorry.”
“Yeah, me too,” Clarke said numbly as she followed Bellamy out to his car.
When she got to the hospital, she grabbed her father’s hand and tried not to cry as she said goodbye.
Of course, her mom was pissed that she was drunk, but she didn’t say anything more about it.
“He was coming home from the store, Clarke,” her mom said, “he got this for you...”
Clarke stared at the package- opening the card, she read the short but thought-out message.
Wow, 22! And... I know I shouldn’t call you that any more... but you’ll always be my little girl.
I know your mom is worried about your ‘lifestyle’ of late. We had a little fight about whether or not to give you anything this year... because she was afraid that you’d just sell it... But I have a faith in you, Clarke. You’ll turn it around- you've got too much of both us in you not to.
Beyond that, you’ve got too much of yourself in you to not be amazing.
I love you so much, and I hope you use this gift creatively... Maybe you could start writing again? Who knows where that will take you?
Happy Birthday, Honey.
Clarke didn’t open the gift until after the funeral. She hadn’t even taken it home... But when Bellamy showed up at her mom’s house for the after-service brunch, he had the present under his arm, and wouldn’t leave her alone until she opened it.
And there it was... a new laptop. Her ex, Finn who had cheated on her, had stolen her last computer to get the drugs he overdosed on. That had been what sent her into a spiral in the first place... and now. The last of her father she had left was this- a laptop and a burning desire to do better in his memory...
So, she wrote. Obsessively, neurotically.
And most of it was good- her first published book was inspired by her experiences with Finn, losing her father and her strange relationship with her mom.
It was also about the unlikely friendship between herself and the man who had told her, with his hand raking through his hair, that her father was as good as dead.
When Bellamy read it, he cried. But Bellamy always cries.
The last time Clarke cried was the day she mourned her father’s death- and she cried on Bellamy’s shoulder.
That and so many other things are what make him so special.
“So, what did you think?” Clarke asked, fetching her speech from the printer.
“Well, I think it was accurate. And very respectful. You captured your mother’s wishes well,” he said, and if anyone would know, it was Bellamy. She taught him and Jackson throughout med school, she was their references and helped them get jobs in the ER after they graduated. Sometimes, Clarke felt as if Bellamy knew her mother better than she did, “As always, you’re a wonderful writer, Clarke.”
“Thank you," she said, willing herself not to blush.
“I’m sorry about the result of the test,” Bellamy said, as they filtered into the hallway. As Clarke locked the door, he sighed, “I know that means you’ll have to get a hysterectomy... but it's better to know now, right?”
“Oh, yeah,” Clarke said, smiling, “I’m not worried about it.”
For a moment, As Clarke got into the elevator, Bellamy stood there staring at her, “really? You're just okay with losing a body part, Clarke? That’s... insane.”
“I won’t need it anymore,” she said casually, “now get in the elevator please.”
Bellamy was silent for a bit before he ventured further, “I’m not questioning your decision making, I’m just genuinely curious. Are you... freezing your eggs or something?”
Clarke let out an awkward laugh, now was not the time for this conversation, “No, Bell, I’m not.”
For a moment, Clarke watched Bellamy nod his head, as his hands delved into his suit pockets, “So- you’re gonna just-”
Interrupting him with a sigh Clarke decided to just get it over with, “This isn’t how I wanted to tell you. I’m gonna have a baby, Bellamy.”
“Oh?” he asked, as his fingers drifted up to loosen his collar.
“Yeah, and I was hoping you'd help me.”
Some Bellamy POV in the beginning, then some Clarke... and a comedic scene I've had in my head for months.
Also, I had rum today... So, here's chapter two!!
Clarke Griffin was a lot of things...
And she was a little off her rocker, too, as Bellamy came to find out in the days after Dr. Abby Griffin’s “Celebration of Life.”
After Bellamy did a double-take and asked Clarke to elaborate, his heart rate slowed down a little.
“I want you to help me choose a sperm donor, Bellamy,” she said, far too calm to be okay.
“Okay, do you have files or something?” he asked, eyeing her while he held his keys in the ignition, “are you going with Dr. Tsing or Reyes?” Bellamy knew Raven personally, and although they hooked up once, he’d recommend her over Tsing any day- Tsing often pressured people into undergoing and taking unnecessary procedures and medications. Clarke didn’t need that.
“Neither. I’m hosting interviews.”
With a deep breath, Bellamy started his car... this was going to be interesting, for sure.
And that was how Bellamy found himself sitting next to Clarke in an old coffee shop on State St., while they perused what could only be described as resumes for her black-market sperm donors.
“This is insane, Clarke,” Bellamy mumbled, looking at the file for one Roan Geda, “I’m gonna CCAP every one of these guys, I hope you realize that.”
As Clarke laughed, Bellamy opened his laptop. He wasn’t kidding. Immediately he went to the county circuit court page and entered Mr. Geda’s info.
“Assault and Battery, Clarke- and domestic abuse,” Bellamy said, turning the computer toward her, “I’m not saying all kids are destined to become their fathers, but unless you have a great lawyer draw something up, I’d be leery of this guy.”
Rolling her eyes, Clarke set her hand on Bellamy’s thigh, “that’s why I asked you. I knew you’d be protective, but smart, and I trust you. So, yeah, Roan’s out.” Immediately, she picked up her phone and texted someone, “there, canceled.”
Bellamy let out a sigh of relief, and they continued like that until the first appointment arrived.
“Ms. Griffin?” a deep, but sincerely warm voice met their ears. Immediately, Clarke rose to raise her hand. After a moment, Bellamy followed suit.
“Hi, Russell Lightbourne, right?” Clarke asked, “I’m Clarke, and this is Bellamy, my Platonic Life Partner.”
Bellamy couldn’t help but internally cringe at that. Clarke said shit like that all the time. Things like they were ‘life partners’ or that she ‘loved him’ or that they were even ‘soul-mates.’ Maybe in another life, they were. But in this life, Clarke said those sorts of things all the while being blissfully unaware of just how much Bellamy worried about her, stressed over her wellbeing, and dreamed of the day that he could find the right moment to just kiss her, and see if she felt the same way.
In short, he loved her.
And he had known it ever since she jokingly mistook him for a male stripper.
That being said, no such thing would happen- he would never kiss her, and now he had to help her choose another man to father her child...
So, Bellamy took a deep breath and stretched out his hand to shake the older man’s, “nice to meet you,” he said, and without a beat, added, “is the photo you provided... out of date ? ”
It spiraled from there...
Each potential donor had some sort of shady thing about him. For Russell, it was that he lost his daughter, and couldn’t stand the idea of not having an offspring to perpetuate his line.
For Cage Wallace, he wanted the satisfaction of creeping a woman out. Bellamy could tell who he was when he entered the café, and as he approached the pair, Bellamy put his arm around Clarke, kissed her on the cheek and started whispering in her ear (a shade more intimately than he probably should have), so that Cage would pass them by.
“He’s a creep.”
“That’s what you said about Russell...” Clarke sighed.
“Yeah, different kind of creep... this is the sort of guy that will try to come for his offspring in the middle of the night, Clarke.”
“You’re paranoid,” she accused.
“No, I’m protective. And there’s no way that dude’s jizz is going inside of you, Princess.”
Before Clarke could get rightfully pissed about Bellamy’s territorial assertion, another donor showed up... smelling of cannabis, patchouli, and... well, pussy.
“What up!” the boy yelled, and well... it was a boy. It had to be a boy. There was no way this guy was a man, after all, he added, “Jasper Jordan in the house, mutha fuckas!”
And the man-child, who- if Bellamy were ten years younger and not desperately in love with the woman next to him, would have been friends with- answered all the questions truthfully.
“Do you have anything to add, Dr. Blake?” Clarke asked, turning to Bellamy, with a cheeky gleam in her eye.
“Just a couple of things... If you do donate, are you aware that you would have to hold off on coitus for up to a week beforehand?”
Jasper spit his coffee out, “a whole week without doin’ my girl good?” he asked, running his fingers through his beard, “for five thou, I can do that.”
“No, it's five hundred ,” Bellamy asserted, there was no way that Clarke was paying five thousand bucks for this dude’s cum, “and just how much Cannabis do you smoke? Are you aware that it lowers your sperm count, and affects motility?”
Immediately Jasper was ‘hella concerned’ as he said, and then he proceeded to get a free consultation out of Bellamy regarding his sexual (and overall) health.
After an hour and a cup of cappuccino later, Clarke glared at Bellamy, as she muttered, “So, you successfully scared off every single guy, Bellamy. You’re buying me a beer and take out, FYI.”
“Fine with me,” he sighed, just relieved that none of these assholes or losers would be the father of Clarke’s kid.
By the time Clarke and Bellamy were two bottles each into the six-pack he had brought over, she was feeling better about the day.
“You literally chased every guy away, Bell. I can’t even pay to get someone to get me pregnant... That’s fucked up.”
“Look, Clarke,” Bellamy said with a sigh, “you are insanely smart, you’re beautiful, and you’d be an amazing mom. Just find someone who sees all of that, and is willing to take things at your pace.”
For a moment, Clarke merely stared at the man sitting next to her. How on earth could he say all of those things to her and not know that it made her heartbeat at twice the standard rate?
“Who would randomly have a kid with me, Bell?” she laughed, moving to get him another beer off the coffee table, and then handing it over, “at this rate, the only man I am comfortable enough to even consider for this is you- and you don’t want me to have your kid, do you?”
At first, Clarke thought that Bellamy was trying to spare her feelings by not responding, but when he stood up, ran his hand through his hair and let out a ragged breath, and she couldn’t help but wonder what was going through his mind.
“I’ll do it,” he said, his eyes boring into the ground, and then sweeping up to meet hers.
“What?” T here was a disconnect somewhere... Clarke was confident she’d heard wrong, “are you volunteering to... Father my child?”
“Technically, it would be our child .”
“Do you even want kids, Bellamy? Isn't that why you and Echo broke up?” Clarke asked, expecting him to bristle at that. However, when he laughed instead, she raised an eyebrow.
“We broke up because Echo didn’t want the same things, true,” Bellamy nodded, sitting back down, “Mainly, she didn’t want to be monogamous. But I also wanted a family, and she really didn’t.”
“Aw, Bellby,” Clarke grinned, tousling his hair and laying back on the couch. With a smile, she downed the rest of her beer, “tell me why I should have your kid.”
“Well, I’m smart, kind, generous...”
“Only one of those things is genetic,” Clarke teased, wiggling her feet on his lap, taking the hint Bellamy started to take her socks off and rub her feet.
“Fair,” he said, nodding, “On another note, our kids would be the most adorable things in the world.”
“You’ve thought about this?”
“I mean-” Clarke watched Bellamy’s cheeks turn red as he stared at her ankles, “I don’t know... I mean, I’ve wondered if maybe you and I would ever... I don’t know. Maybe it’s stupid.”
“No, I get it. Like what if we made a deal- like when I’m thirty-five and your forty, and we’re both alone? Then we’d marry each other?”
“Sure, something like that,” he smiled, squeezing her calf.
“So, tell me more about your genetic superiority,” Clarke said, breaking the tension, “sell yourself here, Bell.”
“Well, as you know, O and I never get sick. My grandparents are in their 90s, so longevity is good,” as Bellamy pondered, he bit his lip, “and this has nothing to do with genes... but I’d make it worth your time.”
As their eyes met, Clarke felt a tightening in her belly... was he really suggesting they fuck?
“Well, those are all good things,” Clarke said, pulling her feet off of his lap, “would you be willing to provide a sample?”
“Now?” Bellamy gaped at her, his eyes wide.
“Sure... In here? Or...”
“Here is fine, I guess,” Clarke said, getting up to go to the kitchen, “I’ll be right back.”
Grabbing her phone, Clarke opened up her period tracking app. According to it, she would be ovulating in the next few days... so maybe it wasn’t just her being buzzed and impulsive. After all, Bellamy was her best friend...
Yeah, this made sense- much more sense than creepy Russell or stoned-as-fuck Jasper. With a little giggle, Clarke rooted around the kitchen for her turkey baster and a small cup. Finding both, she washed them out thoroughly. Man, what she wouldn’t give to actually just fuck Bellamy.
“Clarke, what are you doing?”
“I just thought I’d wash-” she began. As soon as she turned toward the voice, she dropped the items in question, her gaze sweeping over a beautiful expanse of bronze, muscle, and freckles, “Oh, my god... you’re... very naked.”
“How else are we supposed to make a baby?” he asked, shrugging in such a way that Clarke’s eyes were drawn to his cock.
It wasn’t even hard, and it was probably the nicest cock she had ever seen.
“Oh, my god,” she said, looking away quickly. Unable to meet his gaze, she picked up the turkey baster and bowl and turned to put the items in the sink, “I- uh, that’s a reasonable question to ask.”
“Shit, Clarke... you were gonna try... Oh, Fuck ,” braving a gaze, Clarke looked up to find Bellamy covering his lap with a dinner plate, and staring at the ceiling, “I- I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine,” she said, taking him in properly now... Clarke always knew that Bellamy was attractive- and well, she wouldn’t mind making a baby the old fashion way, “it’s probably more likely to work if we do it your way, honestly.”
“Really?” He said, his eyes snapping back to hers, “I don’t want you to feel any pressure...”
For a moment, Clarke just kept nodding.
“Shots...” Clarke said, tearing her eyes away from Bellamy and making her way to the freezer, “why don’t you put your boxers back on... and we’ll do some shots, and see where that takes us, hmmm? I have tequila.”
“It’s your show, Princess.”
Clarke listened to him leave before she opened the bottle and downed a gulp of tequila. Snatching her shot glasses, she made her way to the living room. Clarke watched as Bellamy sat shirtless, in just his boxers, with his face in his hands, “It’s okay,” she murmured, handing him the shot glass when he looked up at her. Pouring the silver tequila in, Clarke waited while he took the shot.
“One more,” he said, his voice was rough, but a light smiled played on his lips. Clarke did as she was asked, taking the glass when he was done, “thanks.”
“Don’t mention it,” feeling the buzz now, Clarke sat on the couch- on her knees, and gazed at Bellamy’s lips, “can I?”
“Yeah,” Bellamy said lowly, his hand ghosting up her outer thigh, to her hip and pulling her closer, “lay it on me.”
At first, Clarke didn’t quite catch what he said. But as soon as it registered (and halfway through their first kiss), she let out a giggle. Even though she kept giggling, Bellamy continued to kiss her through a smile. When she sat back, however, she almost fell off of his lap. How on earth had she ended up there?
Thankfully Bellamy caught her, “Easy there.”
“I- you said...” Clarke continued giggling, “you said, ’Lay it on me.’ ”
Blushing, Bellamy let out a laugh as his hands fell back to her waist and played with the hem of her shirt. The intensity of his gaze stole the words from Clarke’s throat. Then he was kissing her- and this time, it was good... really, very good.
And then her shirt was being peeled off of her. Clutching his shoulders, Clarke let out a little moan as Bellamy’s lips traveled to the underside of her jaw and down her neck. While his hands cupped her ass, Clarke slid herself against his length, making him gasp.
Carefully, Bellamy shifted his weight to lay her down. Sitting above her, he kissed her lightly, “Sorry, I gotta pee,” he laughed, placing a blanket over her and planting a kiss on her forehead, “I’ll be right back.”
“Okay,” she yawned, closing her eyes, “I’ll be here. Don’t keep me waiting...”
We get to see Doctor Bellamy in full swing. We also get to meet Octavia.
Clarke woke with a pounding in her head, a feeling that her mouth was full of cotton, and a familiar arm draped around her waist.
Opening just one eye, she lifted the blanket to look down and see that Bellamy’s hand fanned over the pale skin of her belly. Wracking her brain, Clarke couldn’t remember anything past making out, and then Bellamy said he had to go to the bathroom. For a moment, she wondered if she blacked out before they... no, they couldn’t have...
Squeezing her thighs together though, she felt no discomfort or pain, and after seeing Bellamy’s cock last night, Clarke knew she’d feel something in the morning. Letting out a sigh of relief, she couldn’t help but be glad that their first time together wasn’t just a drunken, forgettable romp in the sheets. For a moment, Clarke wondered if she ought to extricate herself from the situation.
However, when she tried to, Bellamy’s arm only tightened and Clarke couldn’t fight the warmth and comfort that came from cuddling with him. So, without another thought, she settled back against him, threading her fingers through his and letting the skin of his chest and torso warm her back, as his breath hit the nape of her neck. After everything that had happened in the last few weeks, was it really such a crime to let herself have this?
She had no idea how long they laid there like that, but after waking again, Clarke felt two things behind her. One, the unmistakable pounding of a heartbeat against her. It was racing as if Bellamy had just woken in terror or surprise. The other, was a hard sensation against her ass- well, not just her ass, really. When Clarke had nestled back into Bellamy earlier, she hadn’t realized that she had also settled onto his lap.
God, he was big.
At this point, Clarke knew that no matter how she moved, he was going to feel it- especially if he was awake.
The horny part of her, the part of her that knew (especially) after last night, just how attracted they were to one another, wanted to see if she could get him to fuck her right here and now.
But the other part of her, the one that kept screaming at her that he was her best friend, told her not to fuck that up. Last night they had been rather buzzed, drunk even. She had been vulnerable , and he had been there for her. That was all.
That was it.
There was no way he had actually been serious about giving her a child, was there?
God, his voice sounded rough and sexy...
Pretending to have just woken up, Clarke stirred in his arms, effectively (and unintentionally), grinding her ass on his cock.
“Mm... fuck,” he moaned, and Clarke wanted nothing more than to do it again, to see if he’d rut his hips against her. But she couldn’t. No, this wasn’t the time... They needed to talk about things first, right?
“Sorry,” he said, squeezing her hand, and letting it go. As Bellamy rolled onto his back, Clarke shivered at that the loss of his body heat, “just what you want to wake up to, right?”
“Well,” Clarke said, turning around to face him, “I guess if we would have actually have done it... then we would be naked now, right ?”
“I guess you’re right,” he let out a laugh, not looking at her. As his hand sifted through his curls, Clarke wondered what he was thinking, “I have to admit, I’m a little relieved that you fell asleep on the couch. I can’t believe that almost happened.”
Biting her lip, Clarke tried to not to cry. Of course, Bellamy didn’t actually want to be the father of her child. How could she have been so stupid? With a small huff, she sat up, “Okay... Yeah, you’re right, I get it.”
Before Clarke could get out of bed though Bellamy’s hand was on her shoulder, “Wait, Clarke, I didn’t mean it like that.”
“Then how did you mean it?” Clarke snapped, jerking away from his touch and grabbing her robe off the chair across from her bed. As she put it on, she looked up at him. With his eyes wide, Bellamy let out a breath.
“I just meant I’m glad that we didn’t do it because we were drinking. I think we should talk more about your plan to get pregnant. Last night was pretty impulsive- we need more of a plan if you want the best chances of conceiving.”
“Oh, that’s a good point,” Clarke said, feeling a bit stupid now, “Okay... what do you need to know?”
“Well,” Bellamy asked, not moving from the bed, “when was your last period? Do you track them?”
“Um, I- yeah. I log them in an app,” Clarke said, blushing. Normally, she wouldn’t feel so self-conscious about this with Bellamy, but well, this was starting to feel very, very real.
“Okay, can I see it?” he asked, raising his eyebrows at her elusive reply.
“Uh, yeah- my phone is in the kitchen. I’ll grab it and start some coffee, sound good?” Clarke asked, not waiting for his reply before she left the room.
When Bellamy came into the kitchen (fully dressed, much to her dismay), she handed him her phone and announced that she was headed to take a shower. By the time she finished, brushed her teeth and got dressed, he was sitting there with his glasses on, her grocery list pad, and several pages filled out.
“Wow, you’ve been busy,” she motioned to the pages, “are you hungry?”
“Uh, yeah,” he murmured, “I’m almost done- have you had any blood work done in the last few months?”
“No, I haven’t seen a doctor in years,” Clarke said, sitting down with her mug in her hand, “why do you ask?”
“Well,” Bellamy said, “I wasn’t sure if you had seen a gynecologist or something. Since your periods are a bit irregular, you might not ovulate every time. So, if you find you can’t conceive, it might be a good idea to see if your sex hormones and thyroid levels are normal. It’s really routine stuff for women trying to get pregnant.”
“Wait... hold on, if I can’t conceive? ”
“Yeah, like if we try for a few months, and you can’t get pregnant.”
Clarke sat stunned for a minute, she hadn’t realized that she and Bellamy might have to sleep together more than once to do this. Beyond that, she didn’t realize that she might not be able to do it at all.
“Oh,” Clarke said, “wait, do you think there might be something wrong with me? ”
At that, Bellamy immediate straightened up and turned toward her, “wait, no, Clarke. Listen to me,” he said, taking her hands in his, “there is nothing wrong with you. It’s just, I was trying to figure out, based on your periods, when your fertile window is- and usually, that’s halfway between periods. But, some of your cycles are 20 days, some are 40, and they bounce around. That doesn’t mean it’s bad, necessarily. It’s just worth checking out if we try for a while and you can’t get pregnant.”
“Oh, okay,” she said, still feeling a little panicked, “okay, let’s say I’m a patient, asking for advice on getting pregnant, what would you tell me?”
“Uh, a lot of things,” Bellamy started off, “I’d tell you to eat a balanced diet, lay off alcohol, tobacco, I’d tell you to get protein and take a good prenatal even before getting pregnant. If I knew that your periods were like this, I’d tell you to start trying to conceive the day your period ends and to keep having sex every couple of days until you get your next one.”
“Yeah, I mean, sperm only live in the womb for up to five days- but the egg only lives for 12-24 hours, and the sperm have to be waiting there when you ovulate, Clarke,” Bellamy said with a small chuckle, “so, I’d prescribe a lot of sex... like, a lot. ”
“Why are you laughing?” Clarke asked, feeling a little offended, what about this could possibly be funny?
“I just remembered what they call it at the hospital,” he said. Smiling as he got up for a refill of coffee, “the catholic method.”
“Oh, Jesus. Bellamy, you’re mistaking me for someone who speaks nerd,” Clarke rolled her eyes, “so were you serious about it... helping me?”
“Is that what you want? For me to help you... like that?” he asked, his eyes still on his coffee, but it looked as if he was holding his breath.
“Yeah, of course,” Clarke admitted, “you’re the only one I trust.”
At that, Bellamy’s eyes snapped up from his cup, the intensity of his stare making Clarke’s heart beat faster, “then, I’ll do it, Clarke,” he said simply as if there were some sort of secret there that he wanted her to unearth. But just as she was about to ask him another question, Bellamy’s phone buzzed.
“Shit, that’s my alarm,” he said, “I gotta get home and get ready, I offered to cover Clinic for Dr. Santiago for a few hours.”
“Okay,” Clarke said, turning to her coffee, “um, when will I see you again?”
And there it was, without saying it, she was acknowledging that what happened between them last night changed their friendship irrevocably. As Bellamy picked up the pieces of paper and stuffed them in his pocket, he smiled, “Tonight? According to your chart, it’s the best time to...”
Start , she knew what he was getting at.
“Yeah,” she nodded, “where do you wanna meet?”
“Um... how about I bring over takeout?”
“Yeah,” Clarke agreed, “then we can watch a movie or something?”
“Yeah, okay,” Bellamy nodded, opening the door, “I’ll see ya.”
And before she could say goodbye, he was gone.
Star Wars or Firefly??
It was a simple enough text, but Bellamy’s stomach tightened at the question; they were doing this... they were really doing this.
“Oh, Firefly, hands down,” Octavia said, sitting down next to him, “are you and Clarke binging something tonight?”
“Don’t read my texts over my shoulder, O,” Bellamy said, while typing a quick reply to Clarke, he asked her if Indian food was okay.
“Jesus, it’s not like you’re sexting or something, are you?”
“God, no,” Bellamy said, the idea of his little sister seeing that irked him, “but what if we were? You never know, you could see something you really don’t want to.”
“First of all, relax big brother, I know you’d have more sense than to look at something like that at work... and anyway, you and Clarke?” she laughed, “if you two were finally dating, I’d say it’s about time- but you’d have to ask her out for that to happen... and well, have you?”
“Um,” Bellamy said, as he briefly considered telling her about their plans for tonight... but no, it was too soon, “no, I haven’t asked her out on a date.”
“One day, Bell,” O said, standing up and ruffling her brother’s hair, “One day, you two will figure it out.”
“Thanks, but until then I’m gonna need you to take care of bed four, I need Sanctum Med’s best nurse to lance that ass-boil.”
“You’re an ass, Bellamy.”
“Well, I’m an ass who has to go pick up some Indian food,” he said, getting up and putting his coat on, “later, sis. Don’t forget to give the guy some local anesthetic- otherwise, he’ll kick.”
It took an hour for Bellamy to go home, get ready, and another to get the food and get over to Clarke. When she answered the door, Bellamy couldn’t help but smile. She had gotten rather dolled up for a night in with her best friend. True, she had on light makeup, dark-wash jeans, and a tight shirt that showed off her cleavage. He could even smell her white-lily perfume.
“Hey,” she smiled, opening the door all of the way, and letting him in, “I was beginning to think you’d changed your mind... I was getting nervous.”
“I wouldn’t stand you up,” Bellamy said, wincing at his own words. ‘Standing her up’ implied this was a date... and she didn‘t consider it that, did she? “are you hungry?”
“I can eat.”
“Okay, great, I’ll get everything dished up, why don’t you grab some wine glasses?”
“You got wine?” Clarke asked, clearly amused, “after last night?”
“Well, we won’t get drunk, I just thought it could take the edge off.”
“Are you nervous, too?” she asked, setting the glasses down, while she opened the wine, “I mean, I know it’s you, and it’s me... but yeah.”
“Is this good-nervous, or bad-nervous?”
“It’s more like, I don’t really wanna eat or watch a movie,” She said, pouring a glass of Riesling and downing it easily, “I really just want to finish what we started last night.”
Staring down at her, Bellamy couldn’t quite believe his ears... no amount of desire to get pregnant could make Clarke seem this eager to... well, fuck.
Was it possible that she wanted this, too?
“Well,” Bellamy said with a small smirk, taking a filled glass of wine from her, “patience is a virtue, Clarke.”
Setting the now empty glass on the table, Bellamy almost jumped in surprise when Clarke’s small hands worked to unbuckle his belt, “as you’ll see tonight, Bellamy, I’m not exactly virtuous.”
And here my friends is the reason for the rating!
Anyway, we take off from the end of the last chapter... so, lots of smut. Enjoy.
Clarke hardly let the wine kick in before she reached for Bellamy’s belt. Perhaps, it wasn’t the best idea to be so forward, but she figured that if one of them wasn’t, then they would end up where they were last night- asleep in her bed, and not at all closer to having a child.
“Clarke,” Bellamy said, his voice sounding deep and his eyes turning dark, “are you sure?”
“C’mon,” she said pulling him forward by the belt straps and toward her room. As they moved, she looked up to find Bellamy’s eyes hooded, and his jaw slack. Reaching her bed, she turned around and pressed him against it, until he sat down. Shaking a little, Clarke made quick work of his shirt, and then her own.
Kicking off her shoes, she noticed him doing the same thing. Taking a deep breath, she began to unbutton her jeans when Bellamy’s hand closed over hers, “Hey, why don’t we slow down a little,” he suggested, his other hand moving up her leg... And fuck, Clarke had forgotten how good those hands felt on her, “C’mere.”
Standing between his legs, Clarke ran her fingers through his hair and tilted his head back. As he gazed up at her, she couldn’t help but feel a little bit overwhelmed by what was about to happen. Just kiss him, she urged herself, her fingers absentmindedly massaging his scalp. As he let out a little moan, Clarke smiled, “you like that?”
“Feels nice,” Bellamy admitted, and if she wasn’t mistaken, he was blushing a little? Then his fingers were pressing against the small of her back, pressing her against his half-hard cock. Slowly, his strong fingers eased up her spine, before fanning over her skin and making heat erupt under her skin, “fuck, you’re so soft,” he murmured his lips landing on her neck, making her gasp.
And then his hands were everywhere, holding her waist, pressing against her hips as he urged her into his lap. Settling there, Clarke enjoyed the feel of his hands against her ribs, when suddenly one was cupping her cheek, “can I kiss you?” he asked as if she was the one giving him a gift. Giving him a nod, Clarke found herself moaning into his mouth, while her hips worked against him.
As their kisses grew deeper, hungrier, Clarke felt Bellamy grow underneath her- and god, she wanted. Pulling away, a look of concern flickered over Bellamy’s features.
“What’s wrong?” Clarke asked, afraid she had done something to bother him.
“I just... what do you want, Clarke?” he asked, his fingers toying with the clasp of her bra, “I mean, do you just want the bare minimum... or?”
"Or what?" She whispered tentatively.
"Or, do you want to really enjoy this?" Again, she felt his fingers dancing over the clasp of her bra. Then it dawned on her, he was asking her permission.
With a little chuckle, Clarke smiled, “It’s okay,” she said, “I like having my tits played with.”
At that, Bellamy popped her bra open. Pulling the straps off, he let out a little groan as it fell to the floor, “Sorry, they’re just-”
Raising an eyebrow, Clarke sat back a little, “use your words, Bell.”
“Fuck,” he said, bringing one hand up to cup her breast. As he admired the way it spilled out his hand, he almost whispered, “Please, don’t hate me. It's just- you have gorgeous tits, Clarke.”
Bellamy admitted it as if it was some sort of dirty secret, and well, Clarke couldn’t help but enjoy the fact that he was so sheepish about it.
“You like ‘em?” she asked, making his eyes snap up to hers. When he gave a nod, Clarke grabbed his free hand and put it over her other breast, “well then, don’t be shy.”
At that, Bellamy gave her a devilish grin, wrapped his arms around her, and rose up for a kiss. Turning her around, he lowered Clarke onto the bed and settled over her. Sealing his lips over her nipple, he ran his hand down her stomach until he reached her jeans. Unzipping them, he let his hand sink under the fabric, until he was running it over her pussy, up and down, back and forth, until Clarke was opening and her legs and chasing his touch with her own movements.
“Patience,” he murmured, as she began to moan for more. Clarke could feel just how wet she was getting, but Bellamy wasn’t giving her anything more than teasing touches above her folds- that is until he moved his lips over to her other breast, pressed two fingers against her clit, and began to make small, delicious circles against her.
“Oh, god,” she gasped, her hips grinding against his hand as she let out a desperate whine, “Bellamy, please...”
“Please, what?” he asked, after letting her nipple go with an obscene pop.
“Please, I need you to fuck me,” she said, another whine escaping her throat as a fire began to build in her belly. He didn’t even have to be inside her, and he was going to make her-, “Fuck, Bellamy... I’m gonna come...”
And then his fingers were inside her, thrusting into her, as her back arched and his lips found her tits again, “then come for me, Clarke...” he murmured against her, “c’mon, and I’ll give you anything you want.” With one more finger slipping inside and his palm against her clit, Clarke found herself shattering under him- her fingers twisting the bedsheets as she lost control and came with a desperate cry.
When her heart rate settled, Clarke stared up at Bellamy, who was clearly studying her face as if he was admiring his work.
“God, you’re beautiful,” he said, swallowing hard, as his eyes flitted to her lips. Grabbing him by the back of the neck, Clarke pulled him down into a kiss and began to unbutton his pants.
“Take ‘em off,” she muttered in frustration, “now.”
Popping off the bed, Bellamy did as he was told, while Clarke managed to get her own pants and underwear down to her ankles. As Bellamy caught her struggling, he let out a laugh, but untangled her and pulled the garments off. By the time he got back over to her, Clarke was laying on her pillows, as she tried to control her nervous breathing.
“Ready?” Bellamy asked as he settled between her legs. Clarke merely nodded, wrapping her arms around his shoulders, and pulling him in for a kiss. As his hands explored her curves, Clarke moved her slick cunt against his straining cock. When his hand moved between them, she relished the feel of her best friend slipping inside of her.
Clarke couldn’t help but moan, it had been so long since anyone had been inside her, and well, it was Bellamy. Not only was this the person she loved most in the world, but he also happened to be rather large, and well, the size queen inside her was definitely enjoying this more than she should.
“God damn,” Clarke murmured against his lips, with her eyes closed, “fuck, you’re huge.”
“Sorry, I tried to make sure you were ready,” he said, sounding worried, as he began to pull out.
“No,” Clarke insisted, opening her eyes and wrapping her legs around his waist, “it’s not a bad thing. It feels good, Bell. Really, really, good.”
“Yeah?” he asked, his voice sounding gentle, while he stilled completely, “are you sure? I don’t want to hurt you, Clarke.”
Instead of answering, Clarke just kissed him, tightened her legs around his waist and began to thrust. As Bellamy got her point, he bottomed out and began to fuck her properly. They stayed like that for how long, Clarke couldn’t be sure. All she knew was that Bellamy inside of her felt like perfection. As his cock split her open and moved in and out of her, she settled with her arms around his shoulders. Eventually, her head settled in the crook of his neck, as he pounded into her.
When he began to twitch inside of her, Clarke laid back as he moved his hand between them. Looking down, Clarke watched as his thumb found her clit and he pounded into her. Then they were falling apart together, his hips thrusting against her one last time before he stalled and shook as he filled her up with his seed and collapsed on top of her.
Then, for the first time that she could remember, Clarke felt completely satisfied as she held a spent Bellamy against herself, and played with his curls.
As Bellamy came back to himself, he couldn’t help but feel a little embarrassed about the fact that Clarke was holding him in her arms, and soothing him with her fingers in his hair.
“Sorry,” he murmured, slipping out of her and rolling over onto his back.
“There’s nothing to apologize for,” Clarke said, turning onto her side with a smile, “it was really, very good.”
“Good,” Bellamy said, smiling, before the doctor part of him kicked in. Grabbing a pillow Bellamy settled at her feet, “on your back Clarke,” he demanded.
“What? You wanna go again already?” she laughed.
“It’s not that,” he laughed, draping a sheet over her so that he wouldn’t get turned on again, “you want to lie on your back after sex, and put your feet up. It helps with conception... you know, to get all the good stuff where it needs to be.”
“The good stuff?” Clarke asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Just give me your feet, and I’ll give you a massage, how does that sound?” he said, putting the pillow on his thighs, as he sat on his knees. As Bellamy motioned for her to give him her feet, she complied. Much to his surprise, she let out a little moan, as his thumbs pressed against the underside of her right foot. If he weren’t feeling a bit raw and emotional at this point, he’d ask her if having her feet touched turned her on.
“You’re spoiling me, you know that right?” she asked, wiggling her toes, “If you aren’t careful, I might just try to keep you.”
And although Bellamy knew she was joking, his heart couldn’t help but hope that there was some truth in her words.
As the weeks passed, Bellamy found himself at Clarke’s most nights. After the first time, having sex was like second nature to them, and well, he even started to kiss hello and goodbye and neither of them really questioned it.
It wasn’t until he noticed that she wasn’t taking a prenatal vitamin, that he realized he had dropped the ball. So, after three weeks of sleeping together, Bellamy got a little gift bag together for her- it included various “samples” from around the hospital, and a book about pregnancy and parenting, along with some of the best over the counter pregnancy tests, and of course, the vitamins. He figured that, if he gave it to her like this, as a themed gift, she couldn’t really be offended by the gesture, right?
What he didn’t expect was for her tear up and get pissed at him.
“You think that I can’t take care of myself?” she had accused, sounding genuinely hurt.
“Clarke, no that’s not it... I just thought you might like trying some of these things. See, this lotion, it’s for stretch marks. That’s a morning sickness bracelet, you know... this is cool stuff.”
“Oh, so cool, Bellamy, ” she said dryly, wiping a tear away. Truthfully, Bellamy had only ever seen Clarke cry once- the day of her father’s funeral. Maybe trying to get pregnant was bringing up a lot of emotions for her.
“You know, Clarke,” he said, trying to stay patient, “it’s okay, you don’t have to use it, I just thought you might like it.”
“I’m sorry, I just- you caught me off guard. I’ve been feeling really sensitive all day,” Clarke said, wiping her tears away, “I’m sorry.”
“You already said that,” Bellamy said, taking her in his arms, “and besides, there’s nothing to be sorry for.”
And that’s when she started crying.
And she didn’t stop.
Eventually, the pair fell asleep in bed. Bellamy still in his work clothes, and Clarke in the pajamas that she reluctantly admitted to being in all day. Apparently, she had been too exhausted to do anything.
A few days later, Bellamy was almost falling asleep while doing some charts, when Octavia sat next to him, “who's the new girlfriend?”
“What?” Bellamy asked, jumping a little.
“Your hickey?” O said, poking it with her pen, “so, who is this bold woman that dares to mark you?”
“Jesus, O, mind your own business,” Bellamy said, covering his neck with his hand.
“It’s Clarke,” Octavia said, sounding neutral.
“What? How did you-” and that was when he realized that O wasn’t looking at him, instead she was looking past him, turning, he saw Clarke for himself, standing in the hall with a large box in her hands, “I’ll be right back.”
Racing over to her, Bellamy grabbed the box, only to realize it was empty, “need some help?” he asked, as she looked up at him, her eyes wide with surprise.
“I-,” Clarke shook her head, “yeah, thanks. Do you know where the storage room is? Like where they keep the personal effects of people who get fired, or who quit?”
Or who die.
Bellamy didn’t need to ask to know that she was here to pick up her mother’s personal items.
“Yeah, this way,” he said, settling his free hand on the small of her back, “Is this what the other day was about?”
“Partly, I guess... the hospital called told me I had to pick the stuff up, otherwise they’d toss it.”
“I could have done it, Clarke,” Bellamy offered, “I know how hard this could be.”
“No,” she said, looking at the ground, “I'm her daughter, I should do it.”
As they made their way to Storage Room 2-B, Bellamy couldn’t help but feel self-conscious. He hadn’t so much as heard from Clarke in days, and now she seemed as if she was a million miles away. Using his key card, he opened the door and ushered her in. Once they found her mom’s stuff, Clarke started going through it.
“You should have this,” Clarke said, turning around and draping Abby’s stethoscope around Bellamy’s neck, “my mom always believed in you... she’d be glad to know you got it.”
“Please, just take it?” She pleaded, her watery blue eyes looking up at him, “I want you to have it, Bellamy.”
“Okay, I’ll take it,” he agreed, his hands coming up to rest over hers, “but talk to me, Clarke. Are we okay?”
“Yeah, why wouldn’t we be?” she asked softly, her hands turning to take his own.
“I feel like you shut down the other day, and then we haven’t talked since... I’m worried about you-” Bellamy paused as he had to fight every instinct in him that wanted to call her ‘babe’, ‘sweetheart’, or ‘honey’... instead he settled on, “and I miss you.”
“Well,” she said, moving closer to him and wrapping her arms around his neck, “I’m right here.”
For a moment, Bellamy’s brain froze... was Clarke coming onto him at work? What did that mean for them? But before he had a chance to even think about it, the storage room door was opening, and Octavia was standing with her arms folded and one eyebrow up, “Bellamy, I need you at bed two- penile discharge, the patient says he knows you.”
“Just a minute O,” Bellamy snapped, before she shut the door again, “sorry, Clarke... I’ll call you after work?”
“Uh, yeah,” she agreed before Bellamy gave her a kiss on the cheek and walked out.
“You two are cozy,” Octavia muttered, as they made their way down the hall, “I wonder if she-”
“Shut up, O,” Bellamy warned, “and tell me about our patient, please.”
“Well, twenty-three-year-old male, presenting with penile discomfort and discharge, I’m thinking an STI.”
“And you really need me to tell you to run a full panel, O?” Bellamy asked, annoyed that he had been interrupted by something rather trivial.
“The guy insists that he knows Dr. Blake, and wanted to see you. He got confused when he found out we have the same last name. He seems sorta dumb, really.”
Just then, as they entered the ER, Bellamy heard a distinctive voice boom from bed two, “Yo, Docta Blake, my man!”
As Bellamy made his way over to Jasper, he cringed, this could go very, very badly.
“So did you and Blondie have any luck?” Jasper asked, as Bellamy examined him, “she’s a piece, I’m sure she’d find a donor asap.”
Looking up from the mildly diseased junk in front of him, Bellamy made eye contact with O, “Nurse, can you get a chlamydia and gonorrhea swab set?”
“Of course, Dr. Blake,” she bit. Typical little sister, being a brat.
“Mr. Jordan, I appreciate your interest in my friend Clarke, but I ask that you would refrain from discussing her medical exploits in my workplace. After all, I was there as a consultant and have to uphold her privacy, too,” Bellamy said, pulling the excuse out of thin air easily.
“I knew it,” Jasper said, smiling as he shook his head, “you’re in love with her.”
“That’s none of your business,” Bellamy said, remaining straight-faced, his anger bubbling under the surface.
“You probably ended up doing it, didn’t you?” Jasper asked, moving around a little and making a spanking motion, “is Blondie having your baby, Dr. Blake?”
Just then O got back with the swab, “you know, Octavia, I think I’ll do this one,” Bellamy offered, pulling the packet open and taking the Q Tip style stick out, “Now, don’t move, Jasper... otherwise this might hurt.”
And as Bellamy really dug in there, Jasper let out a little scream, “Yeah, okay,” he said, face red with pain, “I deserved that.”
“Nurse Blake will get you some ice and you’ll get your results in a couple of hours, just hang tight buddy,” Bellamy said, before screwing the cap back on and putting it in the bag that O had prepped.
The bed, the couch, the table...
It was hard to find a surface in her apartment that she and Bellamy hadn’t fucked on, truthfully. By now, Clarke was starting to feel a bit hormonal: she was emotional, bloated, tired and most of all, sensitive. Her tits hurt like hell, and she was having all these weird dreams. Mostly dreams about Bellamy walking out of her life as soon as she got pregnant.
She also kept having a strange recurring dream where she was pregnant and lived with her parents. In the dream, her dad was always building a piece of furniture- whether it was a crib, a bassinet, or a small wardrobe; Clarke would walk into the room, and he would take her in his arms and hug her. He would talk about how proud of her he was, proud that she was bringing a set of beautiful twins into the world- and that she had found herself a great partner to be with.
But even dream dad was wrong, she probably wasn’t pregnant yet, and she didn’t have a partner in this. Bellamy was her best friend, yes. And if she did get pregnant, he would be the father... but how much of a father did he really want to be?
After their talk in the storage area, Clarke had a feeling that she knew what sort of partner he wanted to be, and it didn’t involve having sex with her at work, much to her dismay.
So, Clarke did what she always does (what was getting tougher and tougher to do every day), she took those fears, feelings, and fantasies and pushed them, deep, deep down inside of her- and she locked them up and threw away the key.
Clarke hadn’t been fair to Bellamy the last week, and she knew it...
Her reaction to the gift set had been completely irrational, true. But when he brought that over, it was a reminder that, no matter how great the sex was between them, it was purely functional. They had a goal- to get her pregnant. And Bellamy was letting her use his body for that. As soon as she was pregnant then, that was it. No more mind-blowing, spiritual connection for her... They weren’t even dating, and somehow Clarke felt like her heart was being ripped out of her chest.
But he’d still be there for her... right? They’d still be friends, wouldn’t they?
Bellamy wouldn’t let anything happen to his kids- or to the mother of his children. At least she had that, right?
Fuck- there it was again... the idea that she was having two kids- that she was having twins. Trying to get rid of the notion, Clarke shook her head.
As she looked down at the book that Bellamy had given her, the section for week four started out, "and now, you may even find out your pregnant! Mothers of multiples often find out rather early- sometimes up to nine days before their missed period, that's only a couple of weeks along! Are you having twins or even triplets? Well, let's go over the early pregnancy symptoms again-"
"Ugggh!" Clarke groaned, throwing the book across the room. It wasn't a sign. No- it was just a stupid book.
And then, for the fourth time that day, she had to pee.
This was getting ridiculous.
So, in an effort to put her buzzing mind at ease, she grabbed one of the tests Bellamy had gotten her. After reading the instructions carefully, Clarke peed on it, and placed the cap back on. After washing her hands and counting to three hundred, she took a deep breath, and looked at the test-
Bellamy woke to the sound of a fist banging against his door- checking his clock, he saw that it was two in the morning.
At this time, it could only be two people:
Octavia, or Clarke.
And considering that O was still on shift, Bellamy could bet money on who it was.
Making no effort to work on his appearance, Bellamy opened the front door to find Clarke standing there in her winter coat, “hey,” she said, not meeting his eye, “can I come in?”
“Uh, yeah,” Bellamy said, opening the door as he rubbed his eyes, “Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. It’s fine...”
“Okay...” Bellamy said, at a loss for what to say, “do you want to sit down?”
“Not really,” Clarke said, twisting her fingers together... she did that when she was nervous, “I- uh, I couldn’t sleep, Bellamy.”
He couldn't either... he had gotten used to sleeping next to her.
Bellamy could almost taste the confession on his lips... and he wondered if she missed missed him, too.
Before he said anything else, Clarke took her coat off, and then her shirt and shoes. As she shimmied out of her pants, Bellamy eyed her closely, looking for any explanation for what was happening. And then she was on her knees in front of him her hands untying his sweatpants and palming his cock, “Is this okay?” she asked, her voice breathy and low.
“Uh, yeah,” Bellamy admitted, as she shimmied his pants down, and took him in her had. Floored by her initiative he had to ask, “I- what did I do to deserve this?”
As Clarke stroked his length, Bellamy’s breath caught, “I’ve just always wanted to do this... is that okay?”
Nodding, Bellamy let out a groan as she took the head of his cock in her mouth, and then proceeded to make him fall apart.
The word had been so bold. So exhilarating... So terrifying.
So, naturally, after Clarke took stock of how happy she felt about this, she suddenly realized that she’d never get another chance to do all of the things she wanted with Bellamy.
After laying at home with her phone in her hand for hours, she finally just got up and drove over to his place.
She was going to tell him, she really was. But then he looked so concerned, and he wasn’t wearing a shirt.... and well, she felt like it was her last chance to have him- and it would be just this once. So, without explanation, she had gotten on her knees.
And somehow, that eventually led to her laying in his bed as he ate her out like a man starved. She couldn’t help it, every orgasm he pulled from her was electric- they were minutes long, intense, and she couldn’t stop wanting more.
“Fuck, Clarke,” he gasped as he came up for air, “you’re so sensitive.”
As his fingers skimmed her hip, Clarke shivered.
“That’s new,” Bellamy said, a devilish smirk coming over his features, “this is gonna be fun.”
And it was, it really, really was.
They made it last, it was as if Bellamy knew this might be their last time together.
Every kiss, every thrust, and every caress had been drawn out. Bellamy fucked into Clarke until she was seeing stars and whimpering his name. Then turning them over, Clarke gave as good as she got, as Bellamy looked up at her with a worshipful gaze. With just a gentle press of his fingers against her clit, she fell apart, moaning as she crumbled on top of him and shook from her release.
“Are you okay?” Bellamy asked, his arms wrapped around her cautiously.
At that, Clarke nodded, and apologized, as she started to get up.
“Hey,” Bellamy said, grabbing her hand, “please, stay?”
Clarke nodded, laying next to him, and snuggling close before she opened her mouth again and spoke, "Bell?"
"Mhmm?" he asked, his hand grazing her over arm lazily.
"I took a test... well, actually I took them all..."
When his arm stilled, Clarke held her breath.
"Yeah?" He asked, and even in the darkness, Clarke could see his jaw moving, as he clenched his teeth, "and what was the result?"
"It worked," she said, her voice cracking "I'm pregnant, Bell."
Bellamy processes the news- and then gets some more.
I want to apologize for the delay (gulp, two months?!). I got busy with other projects, got sick, and had a looooooong bout of intense fatigue (I think that's called seasonal depression, or just January for me).
Anyway, thanks for all the Kudos, comments and encouragement.
As always, Taylormorley, you are amazing. I adore ya, and thank you for partially beta-ing this chapter! I also would like to note that I had this chapter mostly done for a while- and I know lots of preggers fics have cropped up lately (and I support this- keep writing). Any similarity is purely coincidental.
Thanks again, everyone! Happy reading!
The first thought that raced through Bellamy’s mind was an echo of Clarke’s own words: It worked.
She was pregnant...
Then, reality hit: she was already pregnant. It was too early to know, wasn’t it?
“You took all the tests?” Bellamy asked, just trying to be thorough.
“Yes, all of them... I’m definitely pregnant, Bellamy,” Clarke said sleepily, snuggling closer. She had her back to him, fitting into the curve of his body like a puzzle piece. Bellamy couldn’t say he was bothered at all by it.
“Okay,” he said, his mind churning. He felt happy, really. But it was just so early.
Was it possible that it wasn’t his?
No- no. Clarke wouldn’t do that to him. To them. Even if they weren’t “together,” she would have told him if she had hooked up with someone else before they had started trying to conceive. Pushing that thought away, another occurred to him...
It could be a false positive, or Clarke could be reading it wrong. That happens a lot, actually.
Trying not to overwhelm himself, Bellamy settled on the safest thing he could think of at the moment: which was that the female body was a mystery. Some women know faster than others- and who was he to doubt her? With that thought, Bellamy pulled Clarke even closer to himself and kissed her shoulder, “that’s great,” he murmured. Still feeling the buzz from earlier, Bellamy just wanted to be close to her. And, as if in agreement, Clarke relaxed in his arms.
“I know we probably should have talked about this before,” she whispered as her fingers threaded between his own, “but I don’t want you to feel obligated to be involved... you can be ‘Fun Uncle Bellamy’ if you want.”
“Clarke-,” he began, only for her to interrupt.
“Look, Bellamy,” she said, turning in his arms, “I don’t want you to feel like you have to date me or marry me, or that you have to be a father. You are an amazing man- if you want to be involved, that’s fine. I’m happy either way, I just don’t want you to feel any pressure.”
Staring at her, Bellamy felt his world tip slightly. After weeks of this, of sleeping together, was it really that mechanical for her? Did she think that he could turn away from her so easily?
“Why’d you come here, Clarke?” he asked, his voice coming out harsher than he intended. Immediately, he regretted his tone. The blonde in his arms looked as if he had slapped her in the face. Turning red, she looked away and cleared her throat.
“Are you really pissed off because we had consensual sex?” Clarke asked, trying to sit up- it was as if she was ready to bolt should this get too intense.
“I’m not mad, I just... I want to know what was going through your head,” he offered as he pulled back to get a better look at her face, “I mean, I think it’s pretty clear that we both enjoyed it. But was it supposed to be the last time or something?”
For a moment, she stared at him, her wide eyes swallowing the moonlight that poured into the room.
“When I got here, I was going to tell you about the tests... but then I saw you,” she said, crossing her arms and biting her lip, “and I realized how much I missed you.”
She said it so naturally, it made Bellamy’s heart stammer. It wasn’t a confession of love or anything, but it was something.
“I’ve missed you, too,” he offered, trying to pull her back to him, “and I want to be a father... I’m here, Clarke, in it for the long haul.”
The hope in her eyes made Bellamy’s chest swell, as she let out a whisper, “Really?”
“If you need anything, and I mean anything, you tell me, okay?”
With a nod, Clarke laid back down, and settled into Bellamy’s arms, “Oh! And we should make an appointment with the OB in the morning... is it okay for Gabriel to know? He usually covers the clinic. They have an ultrasound. I think he’d probably get us in fast for a look. Then, the wait for an OB wouldn’t be so bad.”
“Oh, yeah,” Clarke mumbled, “I’ll start taking the vitamins I almost threw at you, too.”
Clarke turned back around, and Bellamy laughed while he wrapped his arm around her again. As if beckoned on some primal level, his hand settled over her lower belly- over the spot where their baby was just starting to grow.
The next morning was hectic, considering Bellamy hadn’t slept much. He spent half the time worrying about the baby, and the other half worrying about his relationship with Clarke. Was this situation going to ruin what they had? Could they make it through? Was there some chance that she felt the same way, and they could be a real, proper family?
That thought made Bellamy feel a little sick with guilt. He had known what Clarke wanted when he offered his services- she wanted a child. Not an instant family. And the fact that she had sex with him- no, made love to him (because that’s what that was), didn’t necessarily mean anything. She was emotional and vulnerable. And so what if his body brought her comfort- it was the least he could offer, right?
Bellamy had been reluctant about parting ways with Clarke in the morning, but she didn’t have a change of clothes at his house, and she needed to shower before they went to the clinic. Gabriel was more than willing to work them in for a blood test.
“Clarke?” Bellamy tried not to yell too loudly, as he knocked on her door for the tenth time. He had been waiting twenty minutes and was starting to worry, “Clarke!”
“Jesus, Bell,” Clarke said, opening the door and exiting as she put on her jacket, “wake up the whole floor, why don’t you?”
“Sorry, I was just worried.”
“About what?” She asked, laughing as she locked the door.
“It’s nothing. I just- I don’t know. Sorry,” Bellamy said, running his hand over his face, “I didn’t sleep well, and I just keep playing worst-case scenarios in my head. I’ll try not to suffocate you with my need to protect those I- care about.”
If Clarke noticed his near-slip, she didn’t say anything, instead, she just smiled and slid her arm into the crook of his elbow, “is it too late for me to eat like a pound of blue cheese, some raw fish and wash it down with a bottle of vodka? Or would that give you a stroke?”
“First of all, that sounds absolutely disgusting. And second, yes, I would probably stroke out,” he said, “but I am glad that you’re reading the book.”
“Then you’ll be really proud of me,” Clarke chirped happily, obviously proud of herself, “I took my prenatal this morning.”
“Ah, there’s my girl,” Bellamy praised warmly. If it weren’t for Clarke’s double-take, he wouldn’t have realized the implication of his words. Suddenly feeling flushed and awkward, he helped her into the passenger’s seat of his car. Closing the door, he avoided any eye contact. Truthfully, he wasn’t sure if he could handle her reaction to his stupid comment. Clarke didn’t belong to anyone, least of all, Bellamy. Walking around the back of his car, he took a deep breath, there was no way he was going to make today about him.
Ah, there’s my girl.
Clarke willed her overactive mind to quiet down. It was a warm gesture of affection, not some declaration of love- even if the words made her stomach skip and her heart sputter. To say that Clarke was nervous about today would be an understatement. There was a part of her that doubted her sanity. How could she be pregnant already? It was early.
Just in case she was hallucinating, she took two more pregnancy tests (different brands, of course). The Digital test came back positive- and the lined one was darker than the one from yesterday. So, at least she knew she wasn’t going to look dumb in front of Bellamy at the appointment.
“Hey,” she said, turning to him with an idea, “I- uh don’t know if this is weird. But I have a picture of the pregnancy test, do you want to see it?” Clarke blushed as she realized she was asking Bellamy if he wanted to look at her glorified piss-stick.
“Uh, yes!” he said, as if it were a given, “please.”
With a slight chuckle, Clarke produced the image. Turning the car off, Bellamy looked at it, a broad smile taking over his face, “I can’t believe this,” he almost whispered, “it’s real.”
“What did you think I was lying?” Clarke tried to be playful about it, but she really wanted to know.
“No! No,” he rushed to answer, still looking at the photo, “I just- it's weird, you know? It’s in your body, Clarke. It’s a part of me and you, in your body. I can’t get over it. It feels surreal.”
“Do you regret it?” she asked before she could stop herself. Startled, Bellamy looked up at her.
“No, I don’t regret it,” he murmured as his gaze swept over her, as if trying to pick his words carefully, “I just can’t believe you let me put a baby in you. That you wanted me to. I don’t think I’ll ever regret this, Clarke.”
Swallowing thickly, Clarke took her phone back and Bellamy started the car. While he drove, they didn’t talk. For whatever reason, what he said set a fire in her body- and she wanted nothing more than to jump him- right here, right now. As she sat next to him, Clarke had to make a concerted effort not to picture Bellamy fucking a baby into her.
Sitting in the bleak exam room, Bellamy paced a bit as Clarke bit her nails. Her blood had been drawn earlier, earning Bellamy some strange looks from the phlebotomist.
“Who was that?” Clarke asked while Bellamy avoided her gaze, “the woman drawing my blood, she knew you.”
“uh, that was Gaia,” he said, not offering anything else.
“I can read a name tag, Bellamy.”
With a sigh, he turned around, “I- uh think I stood her up.”
“You think you did?”
“I was supposed to go on a date with her the day we met with... the donors.”
“Did you apologize?” Clarke asked, poor girl, being stood up sucked, “I can explain it to her? Maybe she’ll give you another chance-”
As Clarke rambled, the door opened. But she didn’t look at whoever entered, because Bellamy was giving her a weird look- his eyes were bugging, and he looked like he couldn’t believe what he was hearing.
“Alright, then,” Dr. Santiago broke the strained silence. He was smiling, “It looks like everything is in order. Keep taking your prenatal to get your iron up. I’d like you to start more vitamin D since it’ll help with any pregnancy-related fatigue. Speaking of, your HCG levels are very high for how early you are. I don’t usually do this myself, but Bellamy is a good friend- as he so earnestly reminded me this morning when he called.”
Gabriel gave Bellamy a humorous, albeit, teasing glance. “So, I’m going to go ahead and get you in with OB in the next four weeks. It's sooner than most would go in, but if there are twins in there, I think it’s best to know. And unfortunately, we probably wouldn’t see much this early.”
“Okay,” Clarke nodded, “anything else?”
“Nope. Here’s a folder, with important information about pregnancy. I ‘m sure Dad over there will be watching you like a hawk, but I have to give this out,” he said, smiling, “if you experience any complications call my office. I’m happy to help until you get in with obstetrics.” With that, Gabriel congratulated the pair and was off to his next patient. Looking at Bellamy, Clarke’s heart began to pound. His eyes were wide, and his face a bit pale, as he looked at her stomach.
“I- do you-” he stammered, clearly a bit frazzled, “ ... twins?”
Clarke is an idiot. But we love her.
I'm back on my bullshit.
I'm feeling inspired, and I hope you like.
Not just one, but two babies.
Two babies to care for, to raise, to love.
Two kids to chase around the house, clean up after.
Two kids to damage.
“Earth to Bellamy!” shaking his head Bellamy looked down at Clarke, whose hands were on his cheeks, tethering him back down to the solid ground, “Hey, are you okay?”
“Uh, yeah. I just didn’t realize,” shaking his head, Bellamy felt embarrassed, he should have realized it when he noticed she had an early positive, “for Christ’s sake, I’m a doctor, Clarke, ” he murmured as if she would put two and two together and realize he was embarrassed. Instead, her brow furrowed, and she frowned.
“You can still back out,” she said, her voice thin, clipped, betraying nothing but her irritation. But Bellamy knew her- better than anyone else. He knew she had to be hurting.
With a sigh, he rubbed his forehead, and shook his head, “I’m not backing out. I just need to wrap my mind around it. I was trying to figure out how you got a positive pregnancy test so early-”
“Uh, guys?” against his will, Bellamy’s eyes followed that all too familiar voice, to find his sister staring at him with wide eyes. Of course, O had clinic duty today, “I hate to interrupt. But we need to clean the room. It’s back to back appointments today.”
“Of course,” Clarke said, grabbing her jacket as if it were a safety blanket, with her voice coming out small and fragile. Taking one look at her, Bellamy realized she was about to cry.
“O just a minute, please?” he gave his sister a pleading look, he couldn’t have this conversation out in the hall- that would make matters much worse.
“Alright, but just one.”
“Clarke,” Bellamy moved closer using his finger to gently prop her chin up so she would look at him, “I’m not going anywhere. You could be Octo-Mom, and I’ll be right here.”
As a tear rolled down her cheek, Bellamy swiped it away and Clarke let out a laugh, “I swear to god Bellamy, if you put eight babies in me, I’ll-”
“What? Have my babies?” He said, laughing with her, and pulling her into a hug, while he relished the way she sighed and went limp against him.
“Thank you,” Clarke said, her arms trailing down to Bellamy’s waist, as she buried her face in his shoulder.
“Anytime, baby,” he said, the affection rolling off his tongue easily. He felt more than heard Clarke’s sharp breath before she pulled away. Suddenly her face was so close, and he just itched to kiss her- but he didn’t know where the line was, or even if there were lines at all.
“Guys,” O poked her head in again, “Seriously...”
“Sorry,” Clarke said laughing. Turning around abruptly, she gave O a strange hug and whispered something to her. Immediately, Octavia’s eyes went wide and grinned the cat that caught the canary.
“We’ll talk later,” Bellamy grumbled, following Clarke. When he caught up he grabbed her hand and sighed in relief when she didn’t pull away, “what did you say to her?”
“I told her we’ll tell your mom.”
Aurora Blake was... interesting, to say the least. Clarke had always gotten along with her. In fact, the last few years Aurora had invited her over for Thanksgiving and she’d laugh and say things like, “well, you’ll need to know this when Bellamy finally gets his head out of ass and asks you out,” while they prepared dinner.
Aurora was like the mom she never had- which was weird to say. Abby never really baked cakes, or held little baby showers for close friends, she wasn’t on the PTA, and she sure as hell never made a poster for Game Day in high school.
But Aurora was all those things- she was a homemaker, a mom, a warm presence that Clarke took solace in when she was scared about her mom’s illness. Bellamy’s mom knew how to make a house a home. And Clarke loved her for it.
Knowing that Clarke wondered why, exactly, she was so fucking nervous about telling her that she was going to be a grandmother?
She and Bellamy had decided they would hold off until they had the first ultrasound images in their hands- and apparently not a moment later. In fact, they were meeting with her right after the appointment.
So, four weeks after being in the exam room, Clarke was filling out paperwork in the waiting room of Obstetrics and Gynecology. With a sigh, she handed the clipboard to Bellamy and announced that she was done with it.
“Uh, Clarke?” he asked, analyzing what she wrote, “where's your insurance info?”
“I don’t have it.”
“The card? That’s okay... what’s the company?” Bellamy asked, clicking the pen, ready to write it down for her.
“I don’t have insurance,” she whispered, not looking him in the eye.
“What? Clarke, you’re pregnant, you need insurance.”
“I know!” She yelled, drawing the attention of a woman sitting across the room. Lowering her voice, she continued, “I had it. But due to my mom dying, I’m not on hers anymore. I’ve been trying to shop around... but I can’t afford anything private that would cover the hysterectomy.”
“Oh,” Bellamy said, clicking the pen again, he began to write, “that’s fine. You practically live at my place anyway. I’ll just update my info and add you as a domestic partner- you have to change your address though.”
“Wait, what?” Clarke stared at him in disbelief.
“You think I’m going to let you go around without insurance?” Bellamy asked, looking at her like she was crazy, “I can afford it- its great coverage, and I'm going to add the kids anyway after they're born.”
Clarke’s heart stuttered a little bit. The way he said the kids made her smile. They had both grown rather convinced that it was twins. Her nausea had started early, her body was already completely haywire- hence her staying at Bellamy’s. He wouldn’t leave her be, he worried like crazy.
She loved it.
“Does that mean I have to move in with you?”
“Have to? I mean, unless you want to commit felony insurance fraud, then yes,” he said, smiling, “are you in the mood to commit a felony today, Griffin?”
With a little chuckle, she shook her head, “not particularly.”
“Uh, Bellamy?” she asked looking at him, “are we... Domestic Partners?”
Bellamy merely shrugged, “no one will know if we aren’t.”
“So, what if you want to bring home a date or something? Like what are they going to think when they find out you have a “domestic partner” that’s also pregnant with your kids?” Clarke asked dryly. She knew she was being a brat about this. Bellamy was trying to do something nice for her- and she appreciated it. But ever since she told him she was pregnant he hadn’t initiated anything more than a hug or a kiss on the cheek. When she came over to stay because she had been dizzied from dehydration, he gave her his bed and slept on the couch. Whatever they had before, it was clear that it was purely functional.
“Clarke,” he said, letting out a heavy breath, “I told you, I don’t want to date anyone right now. You and I have enough going on.”
The man really wasn’t giving her anything, was he? She kept trying to get him to burst, to tell her he only wanted her, that he didn’t want to be just friends. And yet, he did this. He had to be all noble about it, meanwhile, she was out of her mind horny all the time, and he was there. And he was Bellamy .
Without another word to Bellamy, Clarke got up and nodded for him to follow.
Clarke couldn’t believe how much Bellamy had adjusted to the idea of them having twins. It was clear that he had been terrified, overwhelmed and a little embarrassed that he hadn’t considered the possibility before. Just to be careful with their emotions and expectations, they both would remind one another that they couldn’t be certain until they had the ultrasound.
It might not be twins, she repeated to herself. She might not be pregnant at all anymore.
No, that wasn’t possible. She would know if-
“Hi, Clarke?” a man poked his head into the room and smiled wide. When she nodded, he walked in and offered his hand, “I’m Dr. Cillian Johnston, I’m covering for Dr. Reyes.”
“Hi, I’m Clarke,” she said even though Dr. Tall and Handsome knew that. Clarke hated to say it, but he was rather good looking- and if Bellamy wasn’t going to make a move... Well, she might as well enjoy the eye candy, “This is Bellamy, he’s the father.”
Bellamy seemed to stiffen at her flippant dismissal of him, “Hi, Dr. Johnston, Bellamy Blake, I work down in the ED.”
“Oh, I didn’t realize they had a male nurse down there,” Dr. Johnston said, folding his arms.
“Actually,” Clarke bit, “Nursing is a wonderful and noble profession for any gender. But Bellamy is a Doctor. He’s one of the best. His sister, Octavia is a nurse. Maybe that’s the mix-up?”
“Oh, my mistake,” he said in a dismissive tone, “Ms. Griffin, how is the pregnancy going so far?”
The questions were mundane, a little uncomfortable, and Clarke just wanted the appointment to be over, “alright, if you’d like to change, and cover up to your liking we can do the ultrasound, I’ll give you a minute.”
After he walked out, Bellamy closed the curtain for good measure and Clarke stood up and began to take her shirt off. She didn’t care if Bellamy wanted to avoid looking at her. He could look at the wall if he wanted to carefully, she took off her shoes and pants, straining from the slight bump. She was eight weeks along now, and she was already feeling it.
“You’re showing already?” Clarke looked up to see his intense gaze settled on her middle while his expression remained unreadable.
“Yeah,” she said letting her hand settle there with a smile, “not much, but it’s there.”
Clarke watched as his jaw ticked underneath his beard. God, what she wouldn’t do to just-
“Ready?” a voice called out.
“Not yet!” Bellamy almost growled, his gaze not wavering. Clarke knew that look- he was having thoughts. She could tell her being pregnant did things to him. Swallowing thickly, he stepped forward and grabbed the gown, “May I?” he asked motioning to her. Clarke merely nodded and let him put the gown on her. For just a moment, she was certain he was going to kiss her. Instead, he moved behind her and tied the laces together slowly, his fingers ghosting over her skin and making her shiver.
“Clarke?” he asked, his voice gruff and effected. Her breath quickened as she realized his fingers were hooked into her underwear, “you have to take these off.”
“The ultrasound, it’s a wand, so that they can see the little fetus. It goes inside-”
“Oh,” she laughed, how had she not thought about this? “Um, okay.”
As if reading her mind, Bellamy lowered her panties. When they were around her ankles, she carefully stepped out of them. As her heart pounded Clarke hoped he couldn’t tell how hot she was getting just from him being closer than he had been in weeks. Without a word, he took her hand and helped her arrange herself in a modest fashion. Sitting on the chair next to her, he took her hand and gently rubbed circles over her knuckles, “are you excited? Nervous?”
“I’m- Uh, I can’t even explain it,” she said, feeling herself smile wide, “you?”
“Yeah,” Clarke urged him.
“I’m terrified,” Bellamy said, “I’m ready to hear a heartbeat- or two.”
Oh, that was it. He was worried about losing the baby (or babies). Clarke stared at Bellamy as tears clouded her vision. “Alright, let's save those tears,” a young woman said, smiling as she walked in, “hi, I’m Maya. I’ll be your ultrasound tech today.”
Clarke couldn’t help but feel incredibly relieved that it was Maya and not Dr. Johnston doing the ultrasound.
"Okay, this might feel a little cold, but it'll warm up," Maya said, prepping the ultrasound wand and smiling kindly at Clarke, "ready, Mom?"
With a deep breath, Clarke squeezed Bellamy's hand and nodded, "as ready as I'll ever be," she said. Then, the wand was against her lower belly. In no time, Maya found something. Clarke let out a little squeal, as the ultrasound zoomed in, she noticed it move- it looked like a little cashew wriggling around a bit.
"I'm seeing what looks like two sacs," Maya said, smiling, "this is baby number one... and," she paused, taking photos and then doing something else fancy with the machine- before a sound filled Clarke's ears, "and that, is the heartbeat."
Clarke smiled, only feeling half relieved, "And the other one?"
Maya just chuckled, before she obliged. Clarke felt herself blush deeply, she really didn't mean to be Momzilla or anything. She was just so nervous. Clarke held her breath as the tech zoomed in on the other sac. Unable to handle the suspense, she closed her eyes until she heard Bellamy let out a rush of air and loosen his grip on her hand, "Clarke, baby," he said, his voice impossibly soft as he brushed her hair behind her ear, "look, you were right." Just as she opened her eyes, a second heartbeat greeted her ears.
Happy Valentine's Day, Bellarkes!
This chapter is loaded. Trust me.
There will be a V-Day Chapter next though. Because I can't help myself.
Bellamy was trying not to hyperventilate. He’d been eagerly awaiting this appointment for weeks- in disbelief that they couldn’t get in sooner with Raven (who had been in high demand since she was featured in an issue of People’s Magazine- giving celeb moms workout tips). Being stuck with Cillian Johnston was about the most annoying thing Bellamy could think of at the moment. Well, that and his well-meaning sister pressuring him to tell Clarke how he felt about her.
“Bellamy! She is having your child! You need to be honest with her!” O had said, one day when they were irrigating a leg wound- some dude had gotten a pole in the leg for New Year’s Eve. And as much as Bellamy had wanted to be at home hanging out with his best friend, he was here, taking an extra shift that he didn’t need, in order to avoid said friend- because he was helplessly in love with her.
He had no idea how to cope with loving Clarke, and not having Clarke.
So, he froze. He stopped touching her, holding her, sleeping by her. He figured if she wanted him, she’d tell him.
O didn’t seem to agree. And Bellamy made it clear (for the millionth time) that Clarke said she didn’t want him to date or marry her. Isn’t that what she had said after the last time they slept together? Plus, what they had was perfect enough. They were perfect together, in whatever capacity Clarke wanted.
So, here he was, holding her hand as they both stared at the little peanut-looking fetus on the sonogram. Turning to her, he noticed she wasn’t looking anymore. So, tucking a tuft of her hair behind her ear, he tried to get her attention as he spoke, “Clarke, baby. Look, you were right.”
As the heartbeat filled their ears, the little fetus moved and squirmed. Opening her eyes, Clarke grasped hard enough to almost break his hand, “There it is,” she sobbed, “there’s two. Bellamy, there’s two...”
Kissing her knuckles, he let out a laugh, “yeah, there they are-”
He almost said it, again. He couldn’t help it. Seeing her like this, crying, sweet, vulnerable and absolutely in love with their unborn children, it made his heart full.
God, he loved her.
He loved her so much it hurt sometimes.
But this wasn’t one of those times. This was sweet, beautiful, and made him want to tell her.
“Bell, those are ours!” She said, turning to find him staring at her already. With a tear-filled smile, she threw her arms around him and kissed his neck, before snuggling into him, “We’re gonna love them so much,” she whispered, holding him close.
“Do you want copies at all? Grandparents love them,” a well-meaning Maya suggested.
“Yeah,” Clarke agreed, pulling away, “we can get some for Aurora, right?”
“It’s awesome to see parents so in love when they come in. I swear when I told my boyfriend I was pregnant he asked me if he was the dad,” she said, laughing, “he’s kinda dumb though. I’m hoping our kid gets more me than him, in the brains department,” Maya said, patting her stomach lightly.
Clearing his throat, Bellamy announced he was going to the bathroom- He wasn’t sure he could handle hearing Clarke say they weren’t together, or that they weren’t in love. Knowing her, she’d try to set him up with someone in the department. She had been weird about his dating life lately, after all.
So, taking his time, Bellamy washed his hands thoroughly, before returning to the room.
“As I said, I don’t think it’s really the optimal time for me to be dating anyone, and I’m not sure Bellamy would appreciate it- but thank you,” Clarke said.
“Just, uh, keep my number on hand. If you change your mind.”
What. The. fuck.
Was that... Dr. Johnston’s voice?
Pulling the drape aside a little more, Bellamy looked over the doctor’s shoulder at Clarke, whose face was a deep shade of rose, “everything okay?” He asked, avoiding the urchin who seemed to be preying on potentially vulnerable pregnant women.
“Uh, yeah,” Clarke said, smiling, tucking the card away, “Dr. Johnston was just telling me how to combat... low blood pressure.”
“Yeah, I bet he was,” Bellamy said, walking around the bed and picking up Clarke’s bag, “you got the ultrasounds, right? I think we’re ready to go.”
“Yeah,” Clarke said, putting her jacket on, not fighting him at all on this.
“By the way, HR’s gonna find out about you asking patients out,” Bellamy said, his eyes settling on Cillian, “and I wouldn’t be surprised if you got fired, frankly.”
“Bellamy!” turning toward the voice he found a livid Clarke staring back at him, “I’m sorry, Cillian. As I said, I really am flattered, but it’s just bad timing.”
“Alright, sorry to have caused any offense,” he said, staring at the ground. Obviously, Bellamy had gotten his point across- but the man didn’t seem too worried. What Bellamy wouldn’t give to punch him in the nose.
“Bellamy, we have to go,” Clarke said, pulling him along. As they exited the room, she started walking even faster. Until they were in the parking lot, “Jesus Christ Bell, I can’t believe you!”
“You can’t believe me?” he asked, “who the hell asks out their patients? Their pregnant patients - while the father is with them?”
“Oh, so that’s what’s been going on with you?” she said, looking away, “pregnant women aren’t sexy or beautiful, or datable? Is that it?”
“What? How could you say that?” he asked, putting his elbows on the car and staring at her, was she insane? Of course, Clarke was beautiful and sexy, and what he wouldn’t give-
“Never mind, let’s just go. Your mom is waiting.”
Sitting in the car, Bellamy took a deep breath, “Clarke, please, don’t date him.”
“Why not?” she said, whipping out her phone and Cillian’s card. Was she putting his number in her phone? “god knows I’m not getting any otherwise.”
Clamping his mouth shut, Bellamy pulled out of the parking lot a bit too fast.
Clarke couldn’t believe what had just happened- Bellamy had acted like a complete ass.
Of course, Bellamy had a point. What Cillian did was completely inappropriate. But what Bellamy did was, too. It wasn’t like he owned her or anything. Still fuming, she finished putting Cillian's number in her phone and considered texting him. Just to piss Bellamy off.
Putting her phone away, she decided against acting like a petty teenager.
“I’m sorry,” Bellamy grumbled from the driver’s seat, “I- I’m protective, Clarke. And I just- I went a little insane when I heard him asking you out. I’m sorry for embarrassing you.”
Letting out a heavy breath, Clarke shook her head, “it’s okay, I thought he was being inappropriate, too.”
At that Bellamy let out a little laugh.
“I want you to know that, pregnant or not, you’re a bombshell,” he said, avoiding her gaze and blushing, “and I think I was a little jealous.”
“I’m a bombshell?” Clarke asked, giggling at his antiquated compliment.
“Yeah, even more so now.”
As he said it, Bellamy gave her one of his teasing, flirtatious looks- and Clarke couldn’t help the tension that settled in her stomach, or the heat that crept up her spine, “you do like my little bump, don’t you?” she teased, expecting him to dodge the subject- instead, his eyes flicked over her body and he worked his jaw a little, before he nodded.
Squeezing her thighs together, she begged her body to stop reacting like this. Clarke knew that would be easier said than done, though. Being around Bellamy and not having him (especially after knowing what it was like to have him) was torture.
And apparently the torture was just going to get worse.
They got to the restaurant after Aurora. As they were being led to the table, Clarke heard Bellamy mutter what sounded like “Oh, fuck.” Confused, she looked up to see someone else sitting with his mom.
“What’s Octavia doing here?” Clarke asked, confused.
“Making my life a living hell,” Bellamy said, shaking his head, “Never mind. C’mon, let’s do this.”
“Oh, honey!” Aurora Blake greeted them as she stood up and gave Clarke a hug and a kiss on the cheek, “O just told me the great news!”
“What?” Bellamy said, the sound of disbelief quickly turned to anger, “I can’t believe you told her! I asked you not to.”
“Technically, Clarke asked me not to. But that’s not what I told her.”
“Wait, there’s more?” Aurora asked, her curious eyes sweeping over both Clarke and Bellamy as he pulled out the chair for her. Sitting down, Clarke looked at O. What else was there to tell?
“Uh, well, I guess we don’t need to wait. You wanna tell her, Clarke. Or should I?” Bellamy asked turning to her with a big smile.
“Um, I don’t know,” Clarke blushed, suddenly feeling shy. And then there was Bellamy, grabbing her hand, and pulling her back down to earth. With a squeeze of her hand, let out a laugh and said he’d do it.
“Clarke and I are having twins,” he said, the pride clearly showing through his eyes.
“Twins!” Aurora said, clearly surprised, before she grabbed her son and kissed him on the cheek, “Oh, Bell, I’m gonna be a grandma!”
“Twins?” Octavia said, sounding confused. When Clarke looked over at her, she had a look of concern on her face.
“Is everything okay, O?” Bellamy asked, a little edge in his voice.
“Yeah, I mean, it’s just a lot to find out. Especially since mom didn’t even know you were dating.”
And there it was. Some strange Blake challenge thing was happening.
“Oh, Clarke and I aren’t dating,” Bellamy said, taking a sip of his water. As an awkward tension settled over the table.
“What? Why not? Oh, my god, Bellamy!” Aurora yelled, smacking him over the head.
“Ouch, what!” he yelled, completely taken off guard.
“I raised you better than that! Getting a girl pregnant and just abandoning her? ”
Oh, shit. She thought Bellamy was abandoning Clarke and their children? That he had gotten her pregnant and was just going to leave her? No way, she couldn’t have that- especially since this was all her idea, in the first place.
“Actually, Aurora, Bellamy just meant we weren’t dating because we got married.”
“Oh my god!” Aurora exclaimed, clearly thrilled, as Bellamy’s head turned fast and his eyes bugged, “what a surprise! I can’t believe you didn’t invite me!”
“Or me,” O laughed- as if she hadn’t caused this exact moment.
“Yeah,” Bellamy said lowly, blinking in disbelief, “I can’t believe it, either . ”
Clarke deals with morning sickness- O tries to make up for being a brat.
And Bellamy gets thrown for a loop.
I hope you enjoy!
“Married, Clarke?” Bellamy asked, as soon as they got back into the car, “Married! What the hell were you thinking?”
“I don’t know!” she yelled, clearly overwhelmed, “I just- she was so mad at you. And I didn’t want her to be disappointed. So, it just came out. I’m sorry, Bellamy.”
Letting out a huff, Bellamy started the car. He couldn’t believe this, “that was a big lie, Clarke. There’s no way to undo that.”
“I’m sorry,” she said, her voice sounded pained, “I- I don’t know what I was thinking.”
“You couldn’t have at least said we were engaged? At least then we could politely wait... I don’t know... until my mom dies to break it off?”
“Wow, I didn’t realize the idea of marrying me was that bad,” Clarke snapped, folding her arms.
“If I marry you, Clarke, it’s going to be because I’m in love with you, not because of a lie that you told my mom,” Bellamy said lowly, finally telling her how he felt. If any good was going to come out of this, maybe they’d at least get on the same page.
When Clarke didn’t say anything back, Bellamy turned to see her with her back to him, with her head hanging over the side of his car, she began to puke.
Great- just great.
“How’s wifey?” O asked the next day, as she sat down next to Bellamy in the café at work.
“I can’t believe you,” Bellamy seethed, “I told you that I’ve gotten used to Clarke not feeling the same about me. I can’t believe you-”
“What? She’s the one who lied- I just told mom you were seeing each other. Which, you were, because you have to see someone to bang them,” she said, innocently biting into her food.
“You told Mom that we were dating. When I specifically told you we weren’t, Octavia,” Bellamy said, getting up and taking his tray with him, “now I have to go check on Clarke, she’s been puking since yesterday- I'm thinking it’s stress-induced.”
“I’ll do it,” O said, her eyes darting up to her brother, “seriously, I want to apologize to her. I didn’t realize what a spot I had put you both in. What were you going to do? Prescribe her some Zofran? I can pick it up and take it to her.”
Well, he did have more than half of his shift left, and O was already done...
“Fine,” he agreed, “but if you upset her a little bit, I’m gonna be pissed.”
“On my honor, big brother,” O said, making a cross over her heart.
It was meant to be a gesture of honor and dignity. Why then, with the way his sister did it, did it seem like a trap?
Clarke reached for the handle of the toilet, flushing it for the fifth time that day.
She couldn’t believe this. She hadn’t had morning sickness like this at all until yesterday. On the bright side, at least Bellamy seemed to forget that he was mad at her. He had spent most of the day and night fussing over her, holding her hair back, and even insisted on staying home. Luckily, he had a Zofran left in the medicine cabinet. But, within four hours it wore off, and Clarke was back here, in front of the porcelain goddess.
With a groan, she fell back into the wall, relishing the fleeting feeling of a settled stomach.
“You look like shit,” Octavia Blake’s voice met her ears.
With a whimper, Clarke surged forward to puke again- but she didn’t have anything left.
She had really wanted Bellamy to come home. She missed him so much and felt like such a baby today. She also felt like such a fuck up since yesterday. And she did not need to be reminded of that by Octavia Blake.
“Hey, I brought the Zofran and some water. I also have Gatorade and potato chips- another nurse in the ED swears by all-things potato for morning sickness,” she said, “is it okay if I-?”
“Whatever,” Clarke said, letting Octavia do what she needed to get the pill down her throat. Eventually, she started to feel better, and began to drink the Gatorade and eat the chips, “why did you do it, Octavia?”
“Tell my mom that you were dating?” the younger Blake asked, looking at her hands, “I- I want to say I’m really happy for you and Bellamy. I really am. But you’re both idiots.”
“Wait, what?” Clarke asked, caught so off guard, she had to laugh.
“I was trying to get him to tell you he’s in love with you,” she said, shaking her head, “I thought maybe you’d pretend to be dating, and then have a conversation after you left. I did not see that coming. Kudos, Griffin,” she laughed as she motioned for a chip.
Sharing the bag, Clarke shook her head, “Bellamy is not in love with me,” she said, “I mean, does he love me? Yes. But he doesn’t want to date me- he made that pretty clear.”
“Seriously, Clarke? My brother has been in love with you since the day he met you. He was just too much of a gentleman to tell you. And then, after you healed from your Dad’s death, you started dating that girl. And then, he was properly friend-zoned.”
“Don’t ask me,” O said, holding her hands out, “his words not mine. I don’t know what happened between you two, but Bellamy was really happy for a couple months- then I found out about you being pregnant. And he was really frustrated and upset. Every time I asked about you, he’d lash out. So, I pushed.”
“And?” Clarke prompted, terrified of what Octavia might say.
“And he said the last time you slept together, you said you didn’t want to date him. I told him he must have misinterpreted what you said. But he doesn’t listen.”
I want you to know, you don’t have to date or marry me...
She had said it, true. But because she wanted him to tell her how he felt- in fact, when he didn’t, she cried herself to sleep in his arms.
“I- did I break his heart?” she asked, her own heart pounding against her ribs at the idea.
“Well, he got out of bed and went to and from work this time, so no.”
At that, Octavia paused, clearly she already said far too much, “I should go,” she said, “there are just some things you and Bellamy should talk about.”
“Uh, yeah... thanks,” Clarke said, making no move to get up. As she heard the front door click shut and the lock turn, she broke down while everything hit her at once. She remembered meeting Bellamy, the loss of her father, how Bell was always there for her. How she unknowingly took advantage of that- she had teased him, asked him for relationship advice, joked about them being each other's last resort.
She gave him her body, and he gave her his entire self- without even knowing how she felt about him. He was willing to love her in whatever way he could, in whatever way she let him. And this whole time- without fail- he was there for her whenever she needed him.
He loved her-
Yet, somehow, she hadn't seen it until now.
Bellamy was freaking out a little. He had texted Clarke to make sure she got the meds and got no answer. He texted O, who said, “Mission accomplished,” a minute later, she also said, “Talk. To. Clarke. PLEASE.”
So, getting off work a little early, he picked up take out from their favorite Thai place, got some sparkling cider, flowers, and chocolate. He wanted to show Clarke that things were fine between them after yesterday. After all, it was Valentine’s Day- and she deserved to be at least a little spoiled.
Bellamy carefully unlocked and opened the door, as he set the items on the table, heard a sound coming from the bedroom.
“Clarke?” he called out, making his way down the hall and opening the bedroom door. He found her there, clutching a pillow as if it were a life raft, while it muffled her sobs. Laying down next to her on the bed, he tried to clear her hair from her face, “Clarke, honey. What's wrong?”
Shaking her head, she sobbed even more. At a loss for what to do, Bellamy pulled her into his arms- she came easily, wrapping her arms around him, and draping her body over him as much as she could.
“Do you wanna talk about it?” Bellamy asked, holding her by the nape of her neck, and draping his other arm around her back, “we don’t have to, but if you want to-”
Raising her head, Clarke moved to wipe her tears away, “I’m sorry,” she laughed, touching his shirt, “I’m crying all over you.”
“It’s not a problem.”
“It never is, is it?” she asked, as if she was figuring him out, “it’s never a problem because you love me, don’t you?”
Bellamy froze- is that why she was crying. Had O said something to her?
“Bell, please, I need you to tell me. Are you in love with me?” she asked, sniffling a little, “did I ever break your heart?”
“What? No- Clarke, you’ve never-,” he said. Letting out a deep breath, he took the leap, “you are my heart.”
“Really?” she almost whimpered. As fresh tears ran down her face, Bellamy cupped her cheeks and wiped them away.
“I love you,” he said, voice raw as he tried to be strong and figure out if she wanted to hear that. Nodding she murmured a thank you before she settled her head on his chest, and closed her eyes. In no time, she was asleep- and it wasn't long before Bellamy followed her there.
Bellamy helps Clarke in more ways than one.
Clarke woke sometime after dusk to an empty bed. Head pounding, she tried to remember why she felt a sense of loss- as if she had been holding something precious and it was now gone... Breathing in, she smelled a familiar aroma of sandalwood- gentle but warm. Just like Bellamy.
He had been there...
As the memories flooded back, Clarke felt sick. Had she really cried all over him? Asked him if she broke his heart... had he really said that she was his heart- that he loved her?
“Hey,” a soft voice met her ears. Opening her eyes, she spotted Bellamy leaning against the door frame, wearing sweatpants and a grey t-shirt, “I- uh, bought Thai for dinner, but it went cold. I could heat it up... Or if you aren’t feeling hungry, I got some sparkling cider, and made you a bath.”
“You made me a bath?” Clarke asked, pulling herself up on her elbows. As Bellamy blushed and gave a shrug, she just stared at him. Did he remember what happened? Had it been a dream? Now that she was fully aware, she found her skin smelled of sweat from battling nausea and morning sickness most of the day, “yeah, a bath sounds nice.”
Moving forward, Bellamy turned on the light and waved a bottle of water her way, along with a pill.
“I figured you can have one more Zofran. Then, when you’re ready to go to bed, you can take a Unisom and some vitamin B6. I read that it works wonders for morning sickness. You’ll just have to keep it up every night,” Carefully, Bellamy handed Clarke the pill, and opened the bottle of water. Before she could try to grab it, he raised it to her lips and helped her drink. Looking up at him, Clarke could tell there was something different. He looked so soft and unguarded for the first time in a long time.
After a minute, he lowered the water, and kneeled, “I got you something for you, for Valentine’s Day, I hope that’s okay?”
“Yeah,” she said, studying his features. He didn’t seem mad or upset or anything that Clarke expected from him. He told her that he loved her- and she merely said thank you. That was all.
“C’mon, I’m sure you don’t want to take a cold bath, do you?” he asked, offering his hand. Without a word, Clarke took it and relished in his strong grasp. There was something about his touch that grounded her, that made her feel real, healthy, good. Making it to the bathroom, Bellamy let her go, as Clarke looked around to see the room dimly lit. She could smell lavender bath salts, and the bubbles were richer than she’d ever seen. Before Bellamy could close the door, she reached for his hand.
“Stay with me?” she asked, her voice sounding smaller than intended. She was trying to be brave here- not that she should have to be. She knew he already loved her... so, why then, was she even more terrified?
“Whatever you want, Clarke,” he said, his voice coming out low and affected. As he stood by the door and watched her, Clarke brushed her teeth and began to undress. Raising a shaking hand to the strap of her nightdress, she began to pull it down. As it fell to her feet, Clarke shook- but not with nerves.
“Your blood sugar is low?” Bellamy asked, stepping forward, “I bet you haven’t had much to eat today? I saw you barely ate any of the chips or Gatorade O brought.”
“Sorry, I know I should be better about-”
“Don’t, Clarke,” Bellamy said, smiling warmly, “it's not hurting the babies, let's just get you in the tub, and I’ll pour you a glass of cider. Sound good?”
Nodding, Clarke tried not to well up. He was being so nice- and maybe she was hungry, or maybe she was just hormonal, but Bellamy being so nice was making her feel as if she could cry- again. Before she even realized that she was just staring at him, Bellamy was helping her undress and walking her to the tub.
“Careful,” he said, making sure she was stable as she lowered herself, “there ya go. Okay, get comfy, I’ll be right back. Do you want your food?”
Suddenly Clarke felt like she could eat the whole kitchen. Nodding, she thanked him and relaxed into the bubbles. With a sigh, she gathered the bubbles over her breasts- which were swollen and tender from hormones. Letting her hands drift, she ghosted over her bump. She couldn’t believe that she was showing so soon- even though Clarke wasn’t fat, she still had curves and thought for sure it would take her longer to show. Of course, with her clothes on, no one could tell.
Besides, maybe it was all bloat, anyway. Either way, Clarke liked that there was some sort of physical manifestation of what she and Bell had made together.
“Here we go,” he said, walking into the bathroom with a tray of items. Balancing it carefully, he set it down and sat crossed legged close to the tub. While Clarke watched him, he opened what looked like a wine glass, “it’s not wine, its sparkling cider,” he assured her before she took the wine glass he offered. After downing it, Bellamy refilled it and handed her the bowl of food.
They both ate in silence until Clarke couldn’t handle it. Looking up at Bellamy, she noticed he was politely staring at the cider bottle while he ate his food.
“I love you, too,” she said, a heat bursting under her skin, as she realized exactly what she just did. She meant it, of course, but her mind was ahead of her mouth here- and she really hadn’t meant to say that first. Immediately, Bellamy’s eyes snapped up and met hers. Blushing deeply, he smiled and nodded, while he finished chewing his food.
“That’s good to hear,” he said, but his smirk betrayed just how happy he really was about it.
“So,” Clarke said, looking at her food, and taking another bite.
“Yeah,” he said, putting his bowl back on the tray and getting on his knees, “are you done?”
“Uh, yeah,” she said because she was. Taking the bowl from her, Bellamy set it next to his, without taking his eyes off Clarke. Leaning over the tub, he placed his hand on her cheek and swallowed thickly.
“So... I love you,” he said as if testing the words, flexing them on his tongue. Clarke could already tell the phrase was soon to be well-used by the pair.
“That’s good to hear,” she said, teasing him, setting her hand over his and holding it. Despite the teasing tone, she was near tears once again. But before she could lose herself in tears, she surged forward and kissed him softly, sweetly, fully on the lips.
It was happening- it really was.
Bellamy could hardly believe the words that Clarke had spoken.
I love you, too.
It was so sweet, so pure.
It was the siren song that he needed to hear.
And now he was kissing her deeply, as bathwater sloshed about in the tub, and Clarke clutched onto his t-shirt- making it more and more wet. Pulling back for air, Bellamy kept his hand on her cheek, until she muttered a protest, grabbed a fist full of his shirt and pulled him back to her. As her hands traveled the length of his torso and dipped into his pants, he let out a groan.
“Jesus, Clarke,” he laughed, looking down to see her smaller hand playing with his half-hard cock, “You really have no patience, do you?”
“Not when I’ve had to wait a month,” she said, her teeth coming to rest over her bottom lip. She was a spoiled brat- and she knew it. Right now, Clarke wanted something, and she was going to get what she wanted, that’s how it had always been between the two of them. And the truth was, Bellamy liked it that way.
But there were more pressing matters at the moment. Before she could get him too hot though, Bellamy had to stop her, “Clarke, baby, you need to wash your hair,” he reminded her, taking no enjoyment out of stopping.
“Will you help me?” she almost pouted, her blue eyes milking every ounce of resistance out of Bellamy.
Well, how could he say no?
“Sure,” he offered, reaching for the shampoo bottle. But instead, Clarke pulled on his t-shirt and shook her head.
“No,” she chastised, “you have to get in with me.”
With a little chuckle, Bellamy complied. Standing up, he took off his shirt, and then his sweatpants and boxers. All the while, Clarke watched him with greedy eyes, as she made room for him. Sinking into the water, Bellamy was surprised that it was still rather warm. As soon as Bellamy stretched out his legs, Clarke was there, kissing him, and then turning to settle with her back against his chest.
Carefully, he pulled her hair out of its tie and poured small handfuls of water over the blonde locks. Grabbing the shampoo, he started a lather and then messaged her scalp methodically. As he did so, Clarke let out a little moan, and settled even more into Bellamy’s lap, “’ feels good,” she murmured, her hands settling over her little belly.
As Bellamy looked over her shoulder, he couldn’t help but imagine Clarke, not too long from now, belly round and unavoidable. Just the idea of her so full and pregnant with his children got Bellamy a bit worked up. With a drawn-out sigh, Bellamy’s hands traveled from the crown of her head, down her body, and to her belly, “I can’t wait for your little bump to get bigger,” Bellamy murmured in her ear, his hands closing over hers, almost protectively.
“Are you gonna be one of those boyfriends who won’t fuck his girl while she’s pregnant?” Clarke asked, and this time, Bellamy didn’t think she was teasing at all.
In answer he let his hand drift further down until he was cupping her center. As he ran his finger through her slit, Clarke shivered, and let her legs fall open, “as long as you and the babies aren’t in danger,” he said lowly, right in her ear, “I think I’m gonna have a hard time keeping my hands off of you.”
At that, Clarke looked up at Bellamy as if in a challenge- while one of her hands came up to cup her breast. Taking the hint, he claimed the other with his own hand and watched as it completely overwhelmed him. Fuck- she was beautiful... even more so now that she was pregnant.
“Let me know if it’s too much,” he said, kissing her shoulder and working his way to her neck, as he slipped a finger into her already slick pussy. Letting out a gasp, Clarke’s free hand found his curls and began to pull on them in appreciation.
“Oh my,” she moaned, letting out a squeak when his thumb began to circle her clit. After just a minute of this, she stuttered out, “Bell, I’m- I can’t take much more,” she admitted, now thrusting against his hand.
“It’s okay, baby,” Bellamy said, turning her head to the side so they could kiss, “I’ve got you.”
Just as she pulled back to nod at Bellamy, her orgasm surprised her. With an almost silent cry and a strong fluttering against his hand, Clarke shivered in his arms, until her shaky breath gave way to deep gulps, and then to peaceful sighs of contentment, “that- I approve of that, Bell," she said, patting his cheek as she laughed against his lips.