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Queen Of Roses: During

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His vision was blurry at first, everything around him smelled absolutely horrific. He closed his eyes and shook his head before opening them to find nothing but trash around him. He could hear the deafening noise of the city around him, but all he could see was trash. He closed his eyes again. He tried to remember what brought him here, but he was exhausted... more exhausted than he had ever been before. He had performed in front of millions of people in several different countries and had naturally been exhausted after the shows and the tours, but he had never been this exhausted. He felt as if he had been hit by a bus, had a couple of plates smashed over his head and to end it all was forcibly thrown into a dumpster. The first two seemed unlikely, but the third seemed to be very plausible. He tried his best as he lay there, to remember what led him to this very moment... that's right... a huge argument.

"Freddie... I know you're taking time off, but we both know what Munich is all about!" "And what do you think it's all about Mari?" "Partying, hard drugs, wild sex, the gay scene! Freddie you promised me!" "I don't care anymore! I need time away from you! Don't you understand!?" "Freddie, you've become more and more distant these past few years! We have a child! Melina needs her father around!" Freddie turned the corner in one of the many halls in Garden Lodge, he had to find his jacket... he had to get out of here. "So you're just going to walk away from me!? From our daughter!?" "In order to get some peace of mind? Yes! You're suffocating me Mari! I can't take it! I love you and I love Melina, but I can't handle this anymore!" Freddie yelled. "What are you saying Fred!? You can't handle me anymore? You can't handle us anymore? You can't handle our marriage anymore? Or is it that you can't handle the fact you're with a woman anymore?" Marina said between sobs. Freddie stared at her, his expression unreadable. "Mari... I just can't-" "Please... just give me an answer Fred. I don't want any sugar coated nonsense! Just please open up already... I'm listening! Tell me, so neither of us will hurt anymore." Marina pleaded as she looked at him. Freddie felt nauseous, he never said it aloud. He was a grown man and it was the 80's for fucks sake... 1984 to be exact, and he never said it aloud. He didn't want this to end like it did with Mary. But Marina wasn't Mary... Marina was supportive... truly supportive... Tears fell from Freddie's eyes before he spoke with a heavy gut wrenching voice. "I'm gay... I want to be with a man and... and not you." Tears fell from Marina's eyes as she nodded. She knew this day would come, she had anticipated it from the moment Freddie told her he was bisexual. She understood. She wasn't going to yell or scream or hate him. There was no need for that. "Freddie... I love you. I love you so much... go, go to Munich. I... I'm letting you go. Go be yourself, Fred. Go and be your true self. I refuse to hold you back. Go and find yourself a handsome man who loves you for you. Sure, this hurts... but it's not about me, or our marriage, this is going to be about you and I won't hear anything else... I don't want to. I just want you to go out there, be yourself, be truly happy." Marina said as more tears fell from her face. Freddie was silent for a few minutes before taking a deep breath and speaking. "Mari... thank you. I love you, so so much. After we sign the papers when I get back, I want you and Melina to stay here... please?" "Of course Melina and I will stay here, dear. And yes, we'll sign the papers when you get back. Please be safe out there." She said as she walked up to him and kissed him on the lips. He kissed back, his moustache tickling her upper lip. "I'll be safe. Tell Melina that daddy loves her and will be home soon." He said before turning and leaving.

That was the last kiss they shared as a married couple... though their marriage was pretty much over, that kiss had to have been one of the most passionate they had shared ever since they had gotten married to begin with. Freddie's head started to pound. That's when he remembered more recent events... the cocaine... the sex... his solo work in the Munich studio that was going slower than expected but still somehow got done... Barbara... she left him at the club the night before... Winnie... he had sex with Winnie until he felt like his cock would fall off and until his arse was numb... Paul... Paul passed out someplace the night before... Phoebe... Phoebe had phoned the club the night before in an attempt to find him but he couldn't locate Freddie... the studio... he had to get back to the studio. Freddie started to move around a bit, before his hand felt the rim of the dumpster. He was cold, exhausted, hungry, and he missed Melina and Marina... Hell, he even missed his bandmates. His feet finally held him up and he climbed out of the dumpster. He smelled horrendous. It was embarrassing and horrible. Then, in his exhausted brain he came to the conclusion... someone thought he was garbage and they threw him where garbage belonged. Tears ran from his eyes, his throat burned. He felt nauseous and leaned over and threw up in front of the dumpster. Freddie wanted to just collapse and let Death take him, but his instinctual will to live gave him the strength to stand up and walk out of the dingy alley he was in and find a phone booth down the street. "Hello?" "Phoebe?" "Freddie!?" "Yes darling... it's me." "Where are you!? I'll come and get you!" "The nightclub you called last night... I'm at a phone booth near it. C-Come get me... please?" Freddie said in a worn out voice. "I'll be right there! Don't move!" And about an hour later, Phoebe showed up and saw how awful Freddie looked. Freddie stared at Phoebe and wordlessly got into the car. As soon as the car arrived back at the studio, and the two men went inside, Freddie immediately broke down sobbing in a heap on the floor. "Th-They threw me away! Like I was trash!" "Freddie..." "Take me back home! I want to go home! Now!" Phoebe nodded and after Freddie had been thoroughly cleaned up, he was taken back home to Kensington that same day... where the papers were waiting for him.