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Disney Princesses Never Had It This Good

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“Dean’s being a little bitch again,” Gabe plops himself down on Sam’s lap, jolting the remote off his lap, “what’s got his panties in a twist this time? And I mean it literally, ‘cause he bent over and I saw lace.”

Sam makes a disgusted face and tries really hard to shake the image of his brother in panties off his head, he doesn’t need to be further traumatized by Dean’s sex antics thankyouverymuch.

“Is Cas still here?”

“Nope. Baby bro took wing like half an hour ago. Important angel business and such,” Gabriel says distractedly, flicking his wrist and producing a Milky Way bar out of thin air.

“Yeah, Dean gets bitchy when Cas isn’t around,” Sam shrugs, wrapping his arm around Gabe’s waist and moving him a little so he’s still on his lap but not blocking the television.

The archangel huffs and takes a bite off his candy, speaking with his mouth full, “Those two schmucks should just fuck and get it over it.”

Sam hums his agreement distractedly, paying more attention to the documentary about whales than is brother’s regular love life problems, “Pity this isn’t a Disney princess movie, then they could just sing their feelings out and kiss in an overly romantic scene in the end.”

Suddenly there are hands framing his face and a chocolate covered mouth against his as Gabe smooches him, “Babe, that’s the best idea you’ve had!”

“Wait what?” Sam blinks at him.

Gabriel isn’t listening though, jumping off Sam’s lap and rubbing his hands together, “This is going to be one of my personal best. Right before Nessie, that old gal’s still enjoying her life in the lake.”

“Please don’t go all trickster on my brother,” he pleads, it never goes well when Gabe goes trickster on Dean, one of them ends up either death or with his feathers burned.

“Don’t worry, Sammy, promise there won’t be anyone dying or severely harmed this time, well, I hope not anyways,” Gabriel steps forward, pecks him on the cheek and disappears to God knows where.

Sam sighs and lets his head drop to the back of the couch, there’s no way this is going to end well.


Two days go by and Sam’s still on high alert.

Gabriel has been popping on and off, smirking smugly at him and practically oozing mischief, but still, nothing’s happened. Dean hasn’t died repeatedly; they’re not in tvland or covered in weird substances.

He’s dreading the minute that something happens.

When something does happen it’s so far from what Sam was expecting that he just stares dumbstruck.

They’re on a hunt, demons coming at them from every side so it’s save to say that they’re a little more than busy right now. They’re managing, barely, but they are.

“Cas, if you could get your feathery ass down here and help us out that’d be really appreciated, man,” Dean grumbles through gritted teeth, pushing a demon off of him and burying the knife deep in its chest.

Dean barely manages to take the knife off the demon’s chest when thunder hits somewhere near them, the dim lights of the warehouse flickering on and off as music and a chorus of ‘oh yeah’ starts in the background.

“What the-“ Dean mutters, looking around to see who the fuck is singing where the music is coming from.

I’m an angel with a shotgun, shotgun, shotgun

Angel with a shotgun, shotgun, shotgun

The air around them fizzles and crackles, angel energy making their hair stand on end.

Castiel materializes out of thin air, hand on some demon’ forehead who was about to jump dean, his mouth moving and is he- holy shit he’s singing! What the hell?

Get out your guns, battle’s begun

Are you a saint or a sinner?

Dean and Sam remain frozen, just staring at Cas, as he pulls out his angel blade and twists around, vanquishing demons left and right.

If love’s a fight, then I shall die

With my heart on the trigger

They say before you start a war

You better know what you’re fighting for

He burriest the blade in the last demon and turns to the brothers, eyes intent on Dean.

Well, baby, you are all that I adore

If love is what you need, a soldier I will be

The music comes to a halt, leaving Sam gaping, Dean blushing like he’s the prettiest girl on the playground and Cas looking around disoriented.

“I- I do not know why I was singing. My apologies,” he mutters, shuffling a little in his place, Cas’s eyes come back up, but Dean’s not looking at him, instead his brother’s eyes are trained on his boots as he scratches the back of his neck, “I should be going,” Cas announces, disappearing again.

There’s a beat of awkward silence between the two of them before Dean breaks it.

“Dude, what the hell?”

Sam shakes his head and shrugs, “I have no idea.”

Sicking Dean on Gabriel wouldn’t be the best of ideas at all, so he shuts up about and hopes the singing thing was a one-time thing.


The singing thing obviously wasn’t a one-time thing. Of course it wasn’t a one-time thing.

This time they’re at a bar and Dean’s flirting with a pretty little thing, all blonde curls and wide blue eyes, when the music starts up again, seemingly coming out of nowhere and everywhere at the same time.

As soon as the first cords start, Sam drops his head to the table, knowing what song it is and “Really, Gabriel? Really?” he mutters to himself.

And then the girl starts singing.


Where you from, how’s it doing?

I know you

Gotta clue, what you’re doing?

Sam chances a glance at the girl, seeing her practically in Dean’s lap, his brother leaning as away from her as he can, eyes frantically searching for a way out.

You can play brand new to all the other chicks out here

But I know what you are, what you are, baby

There’s another girl coming up to Dean now, both girls grabbing him by his shoulders and dragging him to a chair in the center of the room.

Look at you

Getting’ more than just re-up

Baby, you

Got all the puppets with their strings up

Fakin’ like a good one, but I call ‘em like I seem ‘em

I know what you are, what you are, baby

There are at least five girls around Dean now, dancing around his chair like this is a goddamn Broadway number, pushing him down on it every time he tries to get back up.

Womanizer, woman-womanizer, you’re a womanizer

Oh, womanizer, oh, you’re a womani-

The music stops. The girls look at each other confused, before turning their back on Dean and going back to their lives.

“Hello, Sam,” Cas says, materializing by his side and making him spill his beer everywhere.

“Jesus, Cas,” he mutters, wiping his hands off on a napkin.

“Dean seems disturbed,” the angel comments, opening his mouth to say something else, although Sam will never know what, because at that moment, Cas’s eyes lock with Dean and music starts up again, a sweet cheesy thing that Sam twist his nose at. He turns to Cas, fully expecting him to start singing, instead is his brother’s voice what reaches his ears.

Close your eyes

Let me tell you all the reasons why

I think you’re one of a kind

His brother sings, voice reverent and sickeningly sweet, as he steps away from his chair and looks directly to Cas.

Here’s to you

The one that always pulls through

You always do what you got to do

You’re one of a kind

Thank God you’re mine

Castiel is watching Dean with wide eyes, knuckles gripping the edge of the table until Sam’s sure he’s about to break it. In fact, he’s pretty sure Cas isn’t even breathing right now.

You’re an angel dressed in armor

You’re the fair in every fight

You’re my life and my safe harbor

Where the sun sets every night

And if my lo-

Dean clamps a hand over his mouth, quickly stalking to the bathroom, cheeks flushed and looking a little panicked.

Sam hears Cas exhale slowly, hands slowly letting go off the table.

“I- I believe there is something strange going on. Have you seen Gabriel of late?”

Sam shakes his head, “Nope, he’s been MIA the last week or so.”

Cas nods his head slowly, “Maybe I should leave, before someone starts singing and Dean propels further into uncomfortableness,” the angel suggest.

“I’m sure he’ll get over it, just sit tight, I’ll go talk to him, okay.”

Sam gets up and makes his way to the bathroom, knocking on the door softly before popping it open, “Dean, you okay?” he asks, poking his head inside.

His brother is hunched over the sink, head hung.

“What the actual fuck, Sammy!”

“I know.”

“Singing! I was goddamn fucking serenading Cas. What. The. Fuck?”

Sam shrugs a shoulder, “I know, it’s messed up and we should look into it, just come outside and reassure Cas you’re not pissed at him.”

“No way in hell, Sammy, what if that happens again?”

“Just take a chance, Dean. If it happens than you are free to leave and I can walk to the motel.

His older brother sets his jaw and nods once, striding out of the door propusefully.

As soon as he’s within Cas’s eye range the music starts up again. A different one now.

“Shit,” Sam mutters, jumping back when thick walls start forming around Dean, raising to the bar’s ceiling and caging his brother in.

Remember those walls I built?

Well, baby, they’re tumbling down

And they didn’t even put up a fight

They didn’t even make a sound

 The walls tumble to the floor, seeming to have toppled over just with the touch of Dean’s fingertips.

I found a way to let you in

But I never really had a doubt

Standing in the light of your halo

I got my angel now

 Dean advances on Cas, slow steps that he seems to be fighting.

Gabe’s getting so much shit for this later.

It’s like I’ve been awakened

Every rule I had you breaking

It’s the risk that I’m taking

Dean’s right in Cas’s space now, close enough to touch. He leans even closer, pratcially murmuring the following lyrics.

Everywhere I’m looking now

I’m surrounded by your embrace

Baby, I can see your halo

You know you’re my saving grace

There’s a bright, heavenly light surrounding them, as Dean leans closer and brushes his lips against Cas’s. The barest of touches, must only go on for a second or two, before the music comes to a complete stop and Dean jerks back like he’s been badly burnt.

Sam can see Dean’s and Cas’s flushed cheeks, the awed and lost look on Cas’s face, the confused and scared look on Dean’s face, even as he brother stalks out and slams the bar door behind him.

“Damn it, Gabriel,” Sam mutters under his breath. His stupid archangel is just making matters worse for everyone.

“I’ll go after him,” Cas says to Sam, a defying look in his face, and God, he really hopes they don’t star singing again, because that could send it all to shit.

As soon as Castiel disappears Gabe pops by his side, smiling widely and smacking a sticky kiss on Sam’s lips.

“Come on, babe, you don’t wanna miss the rest of the show.”

Gabe grabs him by the arm and flies them away, landing them nearby where Dean pulled up his car in the middle of the road.

“We’re invisible so shush,” Gabe advises him, looping their arms together.

Dean’s singing something again, something Sam’s never heard before, but sounding sad and mournful.

I’ve given everyone I know

A good reason to go

I was surprised you stuck around

Long enough to figure out

That it’s all alright

I guess it’s all alright

I got nothing left inside of my chest

But it’s all alright

Sam presses his lips together, his heart breaking a little for his older brother as he continues singing how alright it is, even if it’s not.

And now all my loves that come back to haunt me

Cassie, Lisa, Benny, Jo and a couple of other people who Sam doesn’t recognize or can’t quie identify from this distance stand around Dean, looking ghost like and sad.

My regrets and texts sent out to taunt me

I never claimed to be more than a one-night stand

I’ve given everyone I know

A good reason to go

One by one the people around him vanish into thin air, until it’s only Cas and Dean standing in front of each other, Dean wearing his heart and soul on his eyes, seeming to plead with Cas.

But I came back with the belief

That everyone I love is gonna leave me

Dean repeats how it’s all alright again, and Gabriel sniffles a little by his side.

“You Winchester boys just break my heart ya know that.”

And I know, oh no

You’ve fallen from the sun

Crashing through the clods

I see you burning out

And I know, oh no

That I put up a front

But maybe, just this once

Let me keep this one

Dean stops for breath, looking down at his feet and starting to turn away from Cas, mumbling the last words as the lyrics fade out.

And it’s all alright

I guess it’s all alright

I got nothing left inside of my chest

But it’s all alright

Castiel grabs at Dean’s sleeve and pulls him back, eyes looking pleadingly at Dean as a new song starts up.

If shame had a face I think it would kind of look like mine

If it had a home it would be my eyes

Would you believe me if I said I’m tired of this

He mumbles, various versions of him appearing at his back. The leviathan oozing black goo, the God like, the crazy one, Emmanuel, the Cas they first met.

Well here we go now one more time

I tried to climb your steps

I tried to chase you down

I tried to see how low I could get to the ground

I tried to earn my way

I tried to tame this mind

You better believe that I have tried to beat this

The versions of him disappear, the music stops and Cas looks down, shifting.

Another song begins, a chorus singing something Sam can’t quite get before Cas opens his mouth and sings.

Some have their Bibles, and some go to church

Well I found my heaven inside of him

We only talked until believe

Gotta find our destiny

I’ve got him and he’s got me

Cas offers Dean and small smile, pulling him closer, willing him to listen to what he has to say.

‘Cause I see the stars in the freckles on his face

The angel brushes a thumb over Dean’s cheekbone, framing his face with a hand.

And I’m seein’ God every time he says my name

So mother Mary, pray for him

Without him I’m so lost

His love is my religion

And then, very tentatively, Cas reaches forward and brushes his lips against Dean’s, pulling back and smiling brilliantly at him.

Dean bites his lip and looks down, still looking unsure, so Cas keeps singing.

Some have their crosses and their golden gates

Well, he is the grace I wear when I lose my faith

We only talked until believe

The words we say before we sleep

Close my eyes and he’s my dream

He’s the truth inside the world of lies

Keeping all my hope alive

Never going to say goodbye

He finishes off and this time, Dean smiles back, eyes clear as he leans forward and kisses Cas confidently.

“Awwww, gross,” Gabe quips, making a face.

Sam snorts and turns to look away.

“You’re the one who made it happen.”

“Well yeah, but only ‘cause they were being annoying,” he huffs, crossing his arms across his chest.

“Aww, you care.”

“Do not.”

“Do too,” Sam grins, hugging his archangel and laughing.

“Thank you, Gabe. Though Dean is going to give you so much shit for this later.”

Gabe rolls his eyes, “Please, he sang Bublé!”

Sam laughs and Gabe beams up at him, “Okay Samoose, let’s blow this joint before those two start having sex on the hood of the car.”

The chords to You Shook Me All Night Long by AC/DC start playing in the background and Sam clings to Gabe.

They couldn’t get out of there any faster.