Work Header

Smosh One-Shot Collection

Chapter Text

It took a while to figure out

What type of girl that I'm about

Who brings the real man out of me, yah

It was just one of those days when Damien was glad to be dating a girl like Boze. She was simply perfect for him. He loved the way her messy brown hair fell in her face and the way she didn’t care to wipe it behind her ear. He liked her sense of style. She had on baggy, dark blue jeans, her favorite pair of Nike Airs, a black t-shirt, an army green jacket, and a black beanie that complimented her chunky-framed glasses.

I want a girl who takes the bus and who wears baggy jeans

Rockin' Nike Airs, what the h*ll are Louboutins?

Don't want no fake tan, short skirt, daddy's money don't work

Shop until you drop on the town

She was scrolling through probably Twitter on her old iPhone 4, barely holding the railing near the top of the bus. Damien’s arm was around her shoulders and his head resting somewhat on hers. College life sucks.  

“You okay?” Boze asked without looking up. Damien sort of hummed before answering simply.

“Yeah, just tired. I can’t wait for our date tonight!” She gasped.

“Same! I can’t wait to see what you have planned, Mr. Improv!” She teased. He rolled his eyes, which Boze couldn’t see.

“I have a plan!”

“Sure,” she replied sarcastically. He stuck his tongue out, knowing she wouldn’t see that either.

I don't want a girl who take selfies, want her make up free

Don't want no mean girl lady, a pink prom queen

I want a girl who climbs trees, always dirt on her jeans

Her daddy told her how to fix cars, maybe she could fix me

Damien loved Boze’s frugal lifestyle. The way she’d eat every last noodle of her ramen, how she’d eat all of the fruit before it spoiled, how she’d drink the milk from her cereal so it wouldn’t go to waste, how she only bought necessities and Damien had to get her a chocolate bar every once in a while because she refused to et herself one. And even then, she’d roll her eyes at the fact that Damien had ‘wasted money on chocolate’. Dates were different. She didn’t mind them, but more than once a month was ‘too expensive’ for her. But Damien liked that. She was wiser than he’d ever be. Ever.

And all we used to dream about

Is getting rich and getting out

Move to the nicer part of town

Where we'd have numbers on our house

But most importantly, Damien loved Boze for who she was. He loved her funny personality and her sweet compliments, even if it was impossible for Damien to accept them. ‘It’s not an issue Damien, you’re just mean’, she’d teased. He liked when she teased him. It was her way of combining ‘I love you’ with her humor.

I want a smart girl, stronger than her father

Someone who will laugh and tryna fit in the crowd

“I love you,” Damien mumbled.

“Aw, I love you too, Damimen!” She jovially responded. She let go of the rail (on a MOVING bus), spun around, grabbed Damien’s confused face, and gave him a sweet kiss. He had to hold her upright with the arm that wasn’t holding onto the rail. They parted and took deep breaths. “I had to do it before we get locked up in college all day.”

“I’m not upset.” He grinned mischievously. “Do it again.”

I don't really want no trust fund baby

I like my women independent

And I say to people, "that's my lady"

And we don't need nothing e-e-e-lse

I don't want no trust fund baby

Save your money, don't spend it

And I say to people, "that's my lady"

And we don't need nothing e-e-e-lse