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Sleeping Dreams

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Berry visits the hospital again.

 


You're back in the hospital again. Why again? To see your fiancé of course. It's now been two years and five months of him being in his coma, and despite how long it's been you're still keeping up with believing he'll wake up soon. Although, there are days where you're not so sure if he ever will awake. On those days you can't bring yourself to get out of bed and visit the hospital. The most you can do is take your kids to school and take them back home after school hours. Those days are worrying for your children, and you know they worry about you when it happens, yet you still refuse to move much. Sometimes those days can last longer than a single day. Sometimes, it goes on for a week.

 

Thankfully, today is not one of those days. You've made it to his room—Sunny's room. In the early days of his coma you would often see two children walk out of this room when you arrived. You became aware that both were the nephews of Sunny, but you haven't met either of them yet. You started planning your visits around avoiding the children because.. you didn't want to meet them without Sunny. You might be missing out on something by avoiding the kids, but you really hope to have Sunny around for some things - if not most things. You'll meet them both soon...

 

You take a small breath before laying your hand on the door knob and turning it slowly to open the door. It's dark in the room other than the light from outside shining in to cover a part of the room. The light also covers some of Sunny's bed, but doesn't reach to the sleeping Dream's face. Taking a slow step inside you close the door behind you. You know where the light switch is from always coming in here; however, you don't go to it yet. Instead, you stand there for a bit going over things in your head. Things you want to tell your Sunbear so he's caught up on the happenings at home and with your kids. You know you don't have to do this. You know Sunny can't reply to your words. It's just something you started doing sometime between the months of visiting.

 

It takes you a few minutes longer of thinking until you finally go to flip the lights on. The room is filled with the somewhat dim, but still bright light. Sunny is now in full sight with the hospital equipment attached to him so he stays alive while in this state. He looks like he really is in a sleep instead of an ongoing coma, and that's the part that hurts most. His covers are tucked in somewhat from your last visit, and the golden head wear he has is sitting on a table nearby. On that table also sat a picture of you, Juniper, and your other child. You left it there for when Sunny woke up - in case you weren't here when he did. Scenery does have a way of affecting your view of things. 

 

Lights on now, you walk across the room to your fiancé's bed. There's a chair sitting against the wall right next to it. Usually it would have been placed elsewhere in the room, but this is yet another thing that happened between the months of your visits here. You guess the doctors and nurses realized it was best to leave the chair here since you always came by and spend your time sitting next to the bed. You of course move the chair from the wall and turn it so it faces the bed. So you can rest your arms and head on the bed while you talk to your precious Sunshine. You do just that, resting your arms on the bed, and your head on your arms.

 

You smile at Sunny. Sure, he can't see you smiling right now, but you're certain he wouldn't want to see you frowning. What's more, you are here with him right now, so what isn't there to smile about? Even if he isn't here consciously. 

 

"Hey Sunny, I'm back again. I know I didn't come to visit last week.." One of the times you couldn't get out of bed for much. You feel bad for not getting the motivation and mind you needed to visit. You always feel bad about the days you can't do much but lay in bed and worry. "..I'm sorry. I wasn't feeling well again, but I'm better now. And, I have things to tell you.." You shift your head to lay on a single arm while the other reaches out for the Dream's hand. Gently taking the hand in your own almost as if it was fragile, you hold on to it as you get ready to share what you have.

 

"So uhm, first is that our kids are doing great. I've made sure to take care of them as best as I can, and to make sure they always get the love they deserve. I think I might be spoiling them a bit, but I just love them both so much." You smile lifts a little more thinking about the kids. They really do make you happy even when it seems like a lot of work to care for them. Of course, you're not alone in caring for them since you've got help from different people. Maybe it's the worry you have and the mental state you're in from Sunny being in a coma that makes it seem like a lot of work. You get through it though. For them, and for Sunny. "June drew a picture of us last week. We were all having a picnic together. You uh.. you were awake of course, and Serene thought it was weird. I had to explain that you weren't always asleep- It'll be great when you wake up and they'll see that." 

 

Explaining to Serene that Sunny wasn't always sleeping had been a little hard. They've only ever seen the Dream in the hospital bed in his sleep. It's different for June since they were born before the coma happened, so having both kids have a different perspective of their sleeping parent was soon to come to the surface. You believe you explained well enough for Serene to understand. You hope you did. After the conversation about the past wakeful state of Sunny, you had took the drawing and found a frame for it. Now it rest on a table in the living room when it was easy to see.

 

Your fingers move to fall in between Sunny's still ones and squeeze his hand the smallest bit. You've turned your head away from his face, instead now looking at your joined hands. There's small tears beginning to form in your eyes, and the exhaustion you've been feeling for so long is starting to catch up to you. "When you wake up.. we should all have a picnic like in the picture. We can have it here, somewhere else. And then we can spend even more time together as a family.. I know we missed our wedding date again, but we should spend time together first."

 

The wedding.. it was supposed to be in December on your anniversary those two years ago. The last wedding date was the same in September, but that one was postponed due to the birth of the kids. You're okay with waiting though, because all that really matters is Sunny waking up. When that happens, you all can be happy again and then the wedding might happen. On your anniversary day you still secretly hope.

 

You probably shouldn't fall asleep here again. It's already happened so many times, and the doctors always find you like that nowadays, but the exhaustion has finally caught up full on. Once more is okay, right? Your hand tightens its hold on Sunny's and slowly you fall asleep next to your sleeping beauty.