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And so the World Faded Away

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The news of the summer of 2019 was a relatively boring affair. Nothing much of import happened in the world, well, a ton of things happened in the world, but depending on who was reading it, none of that mattered. What did matter was that the beloved fantasy drama Duel of Knights was back for its third season, and production had just been announced to have started, sending fan theorists into a frenzy, and online polls started up in droves to guess just what would happen this next season. 

They wondered whether the dark or light side would win, whether the kingdom of Alderaan would fall or work together with that of Mustafar, whether the relationship between Storm and Flyboy was just queer baiting or an actual romance that was blossoming to life. 

Above all, though, they wondered whether the slow burn between Kylo Ren and Kira, the black and white knights respectively, would finally hookup after a season’s long slow burn. After a tiny kiss at the end of the second season before they were cruelly wrenched away by their opposing sides, many suspected the two would be starting a forbidden romance rather soon. 

As of the first meeting for season three episode three, those people were right. 

The actors portraying Kylo and Kira were at a top secret meeting which no one would be allowed to attend but them, two writers, the series creator, and the episode’s director. Not even any of the other cast was allowed to attend, and Ben Solo and Rey Johnson were only allowed on the signature of an intensive NDA. 

The two presently sat on the opposite side of a desk of Poe Dameron, who was the heart and soul of the series as its creator—who also starred as the notorious Flyboy—and giving them a grin that suggested something wicked was afoot. “So, I assume you both suspect why I called you here today.”

“Our characters are starting a forbidden relationship,” Rey replied, her voice almost deadpan as she recited the news she’d already imagined hearing a thousand and one times. 

Beside her, Ben snickered quietly, but said nothing, opting instead to cross his arms over his chest and wait for the news like a good little soldier. She was going to kill him. She loved him, he was her best friend, but he was going to meet the business end of her unfortunately fake sword if he kept this up. 

“Yeah, but we’ve all known that’s coming for a while, and yes, it starts in this episode, but what I want to discuss with you is a bit further on in the season,” Poe said, then he folded his hands over each other on the desk. “You both know what this show has featured. You’ve seen the content warnings. You know what happens.”

“Of course,” they both answered at the same time, then more gentle laughter ensued. 

“What I want to talk to you about is the mid-season finale in two episodes.” Their coworker and boss scratched the back of his head. “As far as we’ve seen, Ben’s character is the only one who’s had a love scene and that was in—“

“Can we just call it what it is? A sex scene. We both know that what happened with Kylo and Phas was just a hookup,” Ben interrupted, and more laughter escaped them both as they remembered how he and their other costar, Gwen had nearly laughed their asses off during every take. It had taken at least fifty before the sex scene looked remotely convincing. 

No one had ever said anything, but it was practically confirmed that was the reason why Ben had scarcely had a sex scene since then. 

“Fine, a sex scene,” Poe grumbled, then he shuddered slightly. “Anyway, that’s why I’m here to talk to you today. We’re still a few episodes ahead, so um… your story is coming to a head. You’re reaching the height of your tale, and it’s come time for your romance to become something more.” When Rey blinked at him, he sighed. “Your characters are going to have sex in the old knights’ temple.”

Rey froze at this. She’d known for a while that characters hooked up on this show all the time and that they sometimes really appeared to be fucking, but she’d never thought—somehow it had never clicked— “Me and Ben?”

“Kira and Kylo, but yeah. You two will need to rehearse with a choreographer starting sometime next week. This scene is big. It’s three years in the making, and we’ve made the fans wait long enough.” Their boss grinned almost impishly. “So this needs to be epic. I need you both to bring your A game, but most importantly, I need to assess with you both just how much skin you’ll be comfortable showing—I know it’s in your contract, but I want to reassess and reassess to make sure everyone’s comfortable.”

“I’m good with whatever won’t get us flagged,” Ben said nonchalantly, then he looked at Rey. “What about you?”

She froze, thinking through everything she’d ever done in her time on the show. Since the latest season had started, she and Ben had kissed quite a lot, and she supposed it made sense that things were heading this way, but still. Her breath caught in her throat and her entire body went numb. She’d thought she’d have more time before she was confronted with a situation like this. 

Mostly because she’d never been in a situation like this. Not in real life. Not yet, and for the longest time she’d thought it was because there was something wrong with her, but in the end, she knew it was just because she’d never found the right person, and now—

“Rey?”

Ben’s eyes were so full of concern, and they’d grown so close over the last few years of filming that they’d started to know what the other person was thinking without it having to be said. He could probably sense every fiber of her nervousness right now, and while she’d never told him she was a virgin—it hadn’t come up—she wondered if he could sense it coming off of her in waves. 

Before he could say anything, though, Rey finally found her voice. “Yes! I’ll do it. Whatever Ben’s comfortable with, I’m comfortable with,” she said, because maybe it wasn’t a lie. By the time they had to film the scene, maybe she’d be perfectly comfortable with the idea of having sex with Ben on screen. After all, who else would she rather have pretend to writhe on top of her for the first time? 

Maybe she didn’t want to actually have sex with him—or did she?— but if Kira did, she wasn’t going to stop the white knight from claiming her prize. She’d been fighting far too bloody a war to be robbed of her endgame now. 

“Fantastic!” Poe cried, clapping his hands together as he stood. “Both of you make sure you’re in top fighting shape for this, it’s going to be awesome.”

*

Several hours later after they were done filming for the day, Rey was leaning against her car waiting for Ben to meet her in the lot. That day, they’d gotten him dressed in full battle regalia, so of course it would take him a second longer to dress in comparison to her, but still, given what had transpired that morning in the meeting room, she was growing restless. 

How was she supposed to do this scene when the only person she’d ever had sex with was herself?

Her breathing grew quick again, and she ran her hand through her hair as her head thunked against the black paint of her car, and all kinds of panicked thoughts began to wash over her. How was Ben going to react to this? Would he not want to do the scene anymore if he found out? She had to tell him, didn’t she?

“Rey!” 

Of course, the moment she started thinking about him, he showed up. She shouldn’t have been surprised. Since they lived so close together they took turns driving one another to work, and he walked up to her like this—or she walked up to him—every night. But that evening she was so on edge that she jumped when she heard her name, yelling quietly as she clutched at her chest in surprise. “Christ, Ben.”

“You okay?” he asked as he got closer, not bothering to walk over to the passenger side first.

She managed an awkward laugh, then nodded as he approached, and rested a cautious hand on her arm, as if he were afraid that she’d jump again at any second. “Yeah, you just-you scared me.”

Ben frowned, then his hand fell from her arm, and he shook his head. “No, I mean… obviously just now you were jumpy, but—“ He sighed. “You’ve seemed a little bit off all day. Is something going on?”

Oh god, yes . Something was definitely going on, but in this moment where she was being prompted to tell him what it was, she found the courage to do so leaving her faster than she ever could’ve predicted, and she froze up for a few seconds. “I-I-“ Shit , how did she get it out?

Luckily, her costar knew her fairly well by that point, and he gave her one of those stupidly charming and sweet Solo grins as he stepped back. “It’s about what Poe told us earlier, isn’t it?” he asked, leaning a hand against the roof of her car. 

She nodded. “Yeah. I’ve been thinking about it all day, and I shouldn’t let it get to me, but—“

“You don’t want to do it?” Ben answered for her, and for once in his life, he hadn’t read her mind. 

“I do.” Her voice was surprisingly sturdy given how nervous she was, then with a trembling hand, she reached forward to grab his, holding it casually as had become habit between takes. “But can we talk about this on the road? It’s getting late.”

Suspicion still present in his eyes, he gave her a quick once over, then the corners of his mouth twitched, and he bobbed his head. “Yeah, let’s get home.”

And Rey would swear she’d never felt more relieved. 

The two parted ways and walked to their respective sides of the car—well, Ben walked over to his, all Rey had to do was open her door—before they slid inside, and she started the engine, bringing them out onto the road as she ran on autopilot. She was too busy thinking of what she’d say to him to do anything else. 

Once they were out on the road, though, Ben didn’t hesitate to start asking questions. “So what’s going on with you?”

She scoffed in disbelief. “You could barely contain yourself, could you?”

A shameful flush colored his cheeks in the dim city lights, enhanced by the first stoplight they came upon as it turned the color red. “Sorry, that was rude of me, what I meant was; is this something that’s going to be invasive of your personal space or is it something I need to know?”

That was better. God , Ben was socially awkward, but he always did try his best to rectify his mistakes. At heart, she realized, he was a really, really good guy. “It’s—it’s something you need to know.”

“And it relates to the sex scene we’re supposed to film soon?”

She bit her lower lip. “Uh huh.”

“But it’s not that you don’t want to do it.”

“I do.”

“So, can I ask what’s bothering you about the scene?” he asked quietly, then she felt his hand pressing against the side of her seat as she turned onto the next road. “Cause whatever it is, I can see the conflict it’s creating within you written plain as day on your face. You’re a great actress, Rey, but you can’t hide this from me. What’s going on?”

This was the moment. This was the time to tell him, and she couldn’t allow herself time to breathe or distract from the subject; she had to do this right then and there. With one last intake of air, she slowed the car to a stop at the next sign, gripped the steering wheel tightly, and closed her eyes. “I’ve never filmed a sex scene,” she whispered, then she glanced at him, observing he still exuded an air of casual nonchalance. 

“Oh, that’s fine, I’ll help you through it.” That smile again. “It’s kind of awkward, but that’s what they have the intimacy choreographers for. We’ll get through it. Don’t worry.”

Her breath hissed as it passed through her newly clenched teeth, then she shook her head. “No, Ben, it’s not just that. I…” Deep breath. “I’ve never had sex for real, either. I’m-I’m a virgin.”

There was the shock she’d been looking for. His eyes went wide, his lips parting softly as he processed what she’d just told him, and suddenly a whole lot of tumblers began to turn in his head. She’d never told him that. It simply hadn’t ever come up, and she knew that he was thinking over every experience he’d ever had with her, trying desperately to think through all the signs that something like this could be true, and certainly finding several. “Oh my god.”

Rey put the car back in motion, though her entire body felt like it was on fire, her hands were trembling, and she felt as if she was going to be sick. “That’s why I’ve been at war with myself all day. I’ve never filmed a sex scene or been taught how to do one, and I’ve never had sex, and no matter how good of an actress you think I am, I’m just-I’m nervous about how this’ll play out.”

Ben paused for a moment, then his hand rested gently on her shoulder. “We’ll figure something out.” 

She scoffed as she finally pulled up to his place, rolling into the parking lot of his building as casually as possible. “Like what? I have no experience with this. At least with things involving grief of any sort I can have something to pull from, but…” Gripping the steering wheel a little more tightly, she turned into a parking space, debating with herself whether or not she really wanted to tell him this as she looked at him. “Ben the only sexual experience I have is kissing you on screen. And one shitty makeout session in high school.”

He stared at her like she’d grown a third leg for a second before he shook his head, then gestured to the ignition. “Turn that off and come inside.”

The look on her face became one of confusion. “Why?” 

“Cause you look scared as hell and we need more time to talk,” he said, then she watched as he got out of the car, shut the door, and looked at her expectantly. 

Groaning quietly, Rey put the car in park, and joined him, slamming the door a bit more dramatically than was necessary as he led her through the parking lot to his apartment. “Can’t I just go home to sulk in peace?”

“Not unless you want to tell Poe you don’t want to do the scene,” he replied, holding open a door for her that led to the main part of the building. “Which I’m fine with, but if you do want to do it, then we need to talk. So tell me, and be honest… do you want to film this scene?”

She thought about it for a moment as they walked down the hall toward the lifts, wondering whether she really had the courage to do something like this. Plenty of inexperienced actors filmed sex scenes, she was positive, and she was a professional, wasn’t she? She could do this. They could do this. If it was anyone but Ben maybe she wouldn’t want to, but she knew him and trusted him almost as well as she knew herself. As he pressed the up button on the elevator, his costar gave him a firm nod. “Yeah, I’m sure, I just need to get… more comfortable with this before we proceed.”

“How?” 

The elevator dinged a second later, and they both walked on in unison, Rey leaning back against the wall as he pressed the button for his floor. “I don’t know, maybe I’ll just watch a lot of porn or something.”

Beside her, he choked on his breath, then began to laugh stupidly hard. “Watching porn?”

“Do you have any better ideas, genius?”

“No, but—” Ben scratched his nose, taking in a deep breath to calm his laughter before speaking again. “Rey, I don’t know how much porn you’ve seen, but it’s all unrealistic, poorly-acted bullshit.”

Fuck , there went that plan. She crossed her arms over her chest and groaned as the elevator dinged again to announce they’d arrived at his floor. They walked out before either of them ever said another word. “I just figured it’d be an easy way to get some experience without having a partner.”

Ben’s keys jingled in his hand as he pulled them out from his jacket pocket, the rippling leather catching Rey’s eye as he moved. “You don’t need to have a partner to have sex—well, not a romantic one.” He had a tiny smirk on his face as they approached his apartment, then he put the keys in the lock. “You just need to find someone you trust.”

An idea sparked in her brain at that, but she waited until they were inside his apartment to voice it. “Someone I trust?” 

“Yeah, like a friend, someone who wouldn’t judge you no matter what kind of stupid shit you did,” he replied as he shut the door behind them. 

Swallowing her nerves, Rey walked into his living room ahead of him, watching Ben’s massive frame fill the short hallway she’d just walked through as he leaned against a nearby wall. His gaze grew curious as she sat down on a massive black couch, and clasped her hands together before leaning them against her knees. “Someone like you?” she asked quietly, then her friend stumbled forward from shock, disbelief written clearly across his face. “Ben?”

“I-I-I guess,” he sputtered, then he ran a hand through his hair, dark waves spilling over his face as he processed what she just said. “A-Rey-I—“

She stood up quickly, crossing the room to take his hands in hers as she pleaded with him to listen to her. “You don’t have to, but I just—I trust you more than anything and my other close friends are in London, so… can you help me?”

His breath hitched from a fresh wave of shock. “Help you with—with what?” 

“Sex. The whole thing. All of it. Or just whatever will make this believable.” She closed her eyes as she spoke, finding she didn’t quite have the courage to look into his. “If you’re up for it, that is.”

When she finally blinked her eyes open again, and looked at him, his expression was unreadable, but she could tell he was thinking about it. A hand had come up to scratch his head, and his eyebrows were pinched together in the way they always did when he was contemplating something. After what felt like an eternity, he slowly nodded. “Yeah, okay, sure whatever you need.”

“Awesome.”

“But we need to take it slow. Okay? We’ve got a week until the intimacy choreographer comes in, and we’ve got even more time after that to get a scene together,” he told her, then the hand she was still holding shifted so it was grasping her a little more firmly. “And I don’t want to rush you into anything.”

“Okay.”

He still looked nervous, but perhaps a bit more comfortable now. “You’re in charge, always and completely.” His entire chest shuddered on his next breath, and she began to wonder if he might’ve been more nervous than she was. “Rey, it’s all up to you. What we do, how we do it, when we start…” A pause. “When do you want to start?”

The answer came to her almost immediately. “Can we start tonight?” she asked, then before the surprise written on his face could turn itself into any sort of protest or question if she was sure, she held a finger over his lips. “I’m already here, we start rehearsing with a choreographer very soon, and if we’re starting small, then… let’s just jump right in.”

“Are you—?”

“I’m sure.” And she was. There wasn’t even a small part of her that didn’t want to do this. Ben had promised to take it slow, which meant she wasn’t exactly going to be losing her virginity so quickly if she started things with him tonight, and if she was being honest… those things he’d said about finding the right person had struck a chord with her. She wasn’t in love with him, or at least, she wasn’t aware of it if she was, but she knew she trusted him enough for this. 

She didn’t want to wait for anyone else. 

In front of her, Ben looked like he’d finally calmed down from his heart attack, and he gestured to the couch behind her. “We should um, we should sit down then, and I’ll uh… I’ll grab us some drinks—if I have anything that isn’t alcohol.”

“Why would it matter if we have alcohol?”

“I mean, if we have a little it’s probably fine, but it lowers your inhibitions and thus your ability to consent,” he said, then he shrugged. “I’m not exactly a sex expert, but I feel like that part’s pretty important.”

“Not a sex expert?” She walked over to the couch, sitting down as he walked into his kitchen, and opened up his fridge, pulling out two cans of coke before he shut it, and made his way back over to her. 

As he sat down beside her, he offered her a can, waiting for her to accept it before he got comfortable, and rested an arm lazily around her shoulders. Suddenly the whole situation felt a lot more real. “I just mean, yeah, I’ve done it a few times with a few different people, but I’m not the most experienced guy in Hollywood you could be doing this with.”

“I don’t think you need to be an expert,” she replied, then she took a sip of her coke. “I believe you said something about how I just need to trust you. And you clearly know more than me.”

A small laugh escaped him as he sipped his own drink. “That’s fair,” he replied, then he set the coke down, and his hand came up to caress one of her cheeks, nearly causing her to drop her can in the process. “But I trust you understand the basic mechanics. You’re not clueless yourself.”

“Yeah, but… what are you doing?” Aside from increasing her heart rate far too fast for it to be normal. A tiny shred of lingering dignity told her to set her coke down, and she did, then she let her hand fidget in her lap in time with her racing pulse. 

“If we’re going to do this, we’re going to do it right,” he told her, then he leaned forward until he was in her space, his eyes staring into hers as he moved close enough that she could lean forward and kiss her if he wanted to. Heat rushed through her veins as he moved, her breathing drifting over her lips in a quiver as she leaned into the touch, but still didn’t kiss him, not yet. The time would come soon but it was not quite upon them. “So I’m going to kiss you, if you’re all right with that. I’m going to kiss you as Ben Solo, and not Kylo Ren, and I want you to kiss me as Rey, not Kira.”

Chills ran up and down her spine as she processed his words. She’d kissed him dozens of times now in character; she knew how Kylo Ren kissed, what he liked, how to drive him mad with her tongue, but she knew nothing about Ben Solo. 

Suddenly, she was nervous again. 

“It’ll be okay, just trust me,” he whispered, then he was close enough that she closed her eyes as he said those last two words, knowing she trusted him more than anything. This was her best friend, the guy she drove to work with every day and told jokes with to the catering people, the guy who knew her deepest secrets and once held her hair back while she threw up in a toilet at an after party. He was fiercely loyal, willing to do anything to help her, and clearly loved her platonically at the very least. She could trust him. 

Rey nodded as his hand snaked its way to the base of her skull, fingers burying themselves in her hair as he pulled her in those last few inches. Her heart was thudding hard enough in her chest for her to feel it when she finally felt his lips brush over hers, and the wave finally crested, falling into calm water again as he kissed her, and the world was sent into a tailspin. 

Kissing Kylo Ren when she was Kira was a raw, intense, lust-induced needy thing that felt like a war for dominance as much as a desire to just be held by the person she loved. When it came to Ben Solo on the other hand, he was impossibly soft and tender, speaking love in a language that transcended speech as his lips caressed hers with the gentlest of touches. He took great care in every move he made, only holding control of the kiss until Rey’s confidence kicked in, then she returned exactly what she got. 

Something about it felt inexplicably wonderful in a way no other kiss had ever felt. Even as Ben wrapped an arm around her waist and began to lower her down onto the couch cushions, she still felt like she was floating. When she’d kissed other people or even him as Kylo and her other partners had done the same thing, something about it had always felt off, but that night when she had his weight pressing cautiously into her, she found she didn’t mind. It felt like she had found a blanket to keep her warm through a cold winter night, or like she’d managed to find cold water on a hot summer’s day. 

Kissing Ben felt like every sweet feeling of comfort wrapped into one, and she knew instantly she’d chosen the right person to embark on this adventure with. 

He broke the kiss briefly as he brought his legs onto the couch, gesturing for her to do the same so she was properly lying beneath him. “Can you, um, spread your legs? We’ll uh… fit better.”

The blush on her face must’ve covered her entire body, but she obeyed his request, parting her legs to allow him to fit better on top of her as they adjusted to this new position. The more he settled down onto her, the more she could feel his erection pressing against the apex of her thighs, and she shuddered at the feeling. He was already hard, and they’d only just started. To be fair to him though, it had been one hell of a kiss. It was, at the very least, nice to know he felt the same about it.

“Is this okay?” Ben asked her, his eyes full of caution. “Cause if you want to go back to what we were doing before—?”

“This is good,” she promised him, giving a hurried nod as she reburied her hands in his hair. “I promise, Ben, this is perfect.”

Still looking a bit worried, Ben leaned forward, and pressed his lips against hers in a short but sweet kiss. “Okay. Let me know if even a tiny part of you wants to stop.”

“I will.”

“Good, then follow my lead, and I promise, this’ll be way easier than you think,” he said softly, then he was kissing her again, and the entire world was spinning at the speed of light as she returned it. 

Not a second later, she gasped against his lips as she felt his hips shift, his erection grinding against her clit to send waves of pleasure through her that she’d only been able to accomplish with her hand. Regaining focus, she deepened the kiss again, and repeated the motion against him, suddenly understanding what he meant when he asked her to follow his lead as they began to grind against one another in earnest. She wasn’t sure precisely what it was they were doing, but she knew it felt good. It made her feel like all the synapses were firing in her brain and a thousand little lights were flickering in her vision as they found their rhythm. 

Soft moans escaped her into the kiss as his hands began to wander, pressing against her hips, her waist, grabbing at her hair, and gently grazing the edges of her chest as if asking permission. She gave it to him when she reached down and grabbed one of his hands, guiding it gently up to rest on the swell of one of her breasts as he continued his ministrations at the apex of her thighs. 

She could feel his smirk as he kissed her, then his lips disappeared from her mouth, leaving a trail down onto her neck as his thumb grazed over her nipple through the layers of her clothing. The feeling that brought her was surreal, unlike anything she’d ever felt, and she thought this must’ve been a dream. There had never been anything else in her twenty six years on this earth that had made her feel this good, and so she could only conclude that this wasn’t real. It couldn’t be. 

But it was. 

She was brought back to reality as Ben’s lips closed around her neck by her pulse point, and they began to suck a mark into her skin she was going to have a bitch of a time explaining to the makeup team in the morning, but she didn’t care. All the things that he was doing to her were making her feel as if she was flying. Each and every brush of his lips against her skin, his fingers over her breasts, or the sweet friction he was creating with their jeans made her feel things she’d never felt before, and already yearned to feel again.  

As if compelled to do so, one of her legs hooked around one of his, pulling him even closer as her orgasm started building. She wasn’t aware of exactly how close she was, but she knew it wouldn’t be long before she came apart. Between each kiss that Ben pressed to her skin, each mark he left, she could hear them both becoming short of breath, and she wondered how close he was as well. Was he on the edge like her? Was he slowly losing his grip on his control? 

Ben, ” she whispered as she felt his teeth tug gently at her ear lobe, then another mark was sucked just a little ways down as he moaned against her skin. 

His movements were becoming a little messier, too. Ben was close, maybe even as close as she was, and she started to think that maybe, just maybe, they’d fall over the precipice together. The thought of it seemed frighteningly intimate, but wasn’t the very thing they were doing exactly that? Wasn’t this whole arrangement frighteningly intimate even if they didn’t have romantic feelings for each other? 

“Ben, I’m gonna— fuck, I’m gonna come,” she breathed, and in response his lips found hers again in a searing kiss that had her seeing stars in her vision. It felt like when she stood up too fast and felt dizzy but in a good way, like when she fell on one of those drop towers at an amusement park but without the nausea. 

It pushed her over the edge, and she came with a muffled cry against his mouth as he continued grinding against her, causing her orgasm to rush through her in waves that had her pulling back from the kiss to gasp for air. His face buried itself in her neck as he worked her through it, every thrust of his hips getting more erratic as he brought himself closer to finishing, then as hers began to ebb and fade, she heard him whisper her name against her skin as he came too. She bucked her hips against his to give him that extra friction through his orgasm, her sensitive clit sending more waves of almost agonizing pleasure through her body until she knew he was completely spent. 

Only then did either of them stop moving, both lying still save for the heaving of their chests as they fought to fill their lungs with oxygen. A bead of sweat dripped down from her forehead as they laid there like that, and she initially reached up to wipe it away, but instead wound up stroking Ben’s hair as she felt him shudder on top of her. Perhaps that was a touch too intimate for two friends who were just hooking up, but she didn’t care. He’s just become the person with whom she shared her first sexual encounter, the first person to make her come besides herself, and she figured it was the least she could do for him. 

A minute later, Ben pulled away, propping himself on his elbows as he looked at her through hooded eyes and hair that was thoroughly sex tangled. The expression on his face was unreadable, but it wasn’t judgemental at the very least. Eventually, it gave way to satisfaction as he stared down at her, the hand on her breast sliding over to rest over her beating heart before ascending to her neck, his fingers sweeping over his pulse point before they wrapped around the juncture of her neck and spine, and he pulled her in for a lazy, slow kiss that seemed to make time itself stand still. 

Rey’s eyes drifted shut as she kissed him back, the hand in his hair bringing him in close again as she felt his weight settle over her. Maybe that should’ve felt overbearing, maybe it should’ve made her feel like she couldn’t breathe or that she couldn’t escape, but it felt fucking nice. It felt amazing in ways she couldn’t even describe, and if this was how their first encounter where she had absolutely no experience had gone, she wondered what it would be like by the time they filmed their sex scene. 

“When we get on camera,” Ben started, interrupting her thoughts as he pulled away, and gazed at her through half-lidded eyes once more. “When we’re filming, I want you to think of that, I want you to do that, except our bodies won’t actually be touching there. But I want you to remember how this feels, because that’s what you and I both need to channel.”

She nodded. “Of course,” she said breathlessly. “Yeah, I can do that.”

“I know you can.” Then he backed away entirely, seeming to snap out of the post-coital haze that had developed between them. “Cause shit, Rey, you’re a natural.”

She rolled her eyes as they both sat up again, stretching out their newly sore muscles as time passed. “You’re just being nice to me.”

“No.” He shook his head as he rested a hand on her shoulder. “I mean it. You… I haven’t come that hard in ages. Are you sure you’ve never done this before?”

A small giggle escaped her as she shoved him playfully. “Shut up.” She was blushing. She could feel that she was blushing, but she couldn’t be bothered to care as Ben gave her that dopey, sweet grin he was known for, and gently rubbed her shoulder. “You meant it then?”

“Every word.”

“Good,” she replied, then she leaned back against the couch cushions with a sigh. “Cause this is only the beginning.”