The first time Harry felt it, Scorpius was drunk.
Albus and Scorpius had just graduated from Hogwarts, all smiles and heads held high as they'd plopped into existence right in the middle of Harry's living-room, only the crack of apparition announcing their arrival. The whole place still smelled of fresh paint and new polished wood furniture. Harry had moved into his new flat only a week ago, his divorce having been finalized. However, he'd never lived alone so he was more than glad that, for the time being, Albus had agreed to stay with him. At least as long as he was doing his two-year apprenticeship at the Ministry, which was starting in a few months' time. James had moved to Romania to train dragons with Charlie right after graduating and Lily had two more years of Hogwarts left, so Albus agreeing to live with him had probably saved Harry from becoming a lonely sad man. Also, it confirmed that their relationship had finally changed into that of a loving father and son instead of what it had been before Al's fourth year, Delphi, time travel and all that bullocks. It made Harry happy knowing that, in the end, everything had turned out fine after all.
But on another note, Harry hadn't realized that Albus moving in with him meant that Scorpius Malfoy, Albus' best friend, would also become a regular guest in his house.
"Thanks for letting me stay over, Harry," Scorpius murmured from across the coffee table where he was sprawled out next to Albus on Harry's dark red loveseat. Harry wondered why despite them going on and on about how happy they were to have finally graduated from Hogwarts, they were still in their uniforms, tie and everything. He guessed that they felt somewhat bittersweet about that part of their life being over after all. At least that's how he had felt after the war—ready to start his new life but also reluctant to leave behind the place that he had grown to call home. So, sympathizing, Harry had poured them several shots of Troll's Schnapps after the other. After all, they were officially adults now.
"No problem," Harry replied, a slightly amused smile on his face at the sight of the two drunk boys on his sofa. "I'm surprised Draco didn't insist on spending the day with you."
"Oh." Scorpius reacted a bit delayed, blinking against the harsh light of Harry's lamps. It wasn't hard to tell that the boy was very drunk. He'd probably never had that much to drink before as he couldn't even hold himself up straight anymore, lolling to one side and leaning heavily against the armrest. "He's out of the country, taking care of my grandmother." Scorpius paused. He looked like he was deep in thoughts before he sighed unhappily and concluded, "She's having a hard time coping with my grandfather's death."
"I see." Harry regretted bringing up the topic because Scorpius' expression suddenly reminded him of the sad depressed boy he'd been after his mother's death. "I'm sorry to hear that."
Thankfully, Albus interrupted their conversation by falling off of the sofa with a loud bang, making Scorpius snicker again and Harry breathe a sigh of relief.
"Time to go to sleep, boys," Harry decided then and was met with an unhappy sound escaping his son's lips, but Scorpius, still chuckling, nodded and then propped himself up on the coffee table before he stood on shaky legs. He grinned at Harry with lidded-eyes. "Can you walk?"
"Nope," Scorpius replied, making a pop sound around the p before he let himself plop down into the cushions again. "I'll just sleep here."
Slinging an arm around Albus' waist and hoisting him towards the stairs, Harry sent a quick smile back to Scorpius, opting to take his son to bed and then come and get the Malfoy who was already pulling his long legs up on the cushions.
And that's what he had wanted to do, but when he came back down a few minutes later, after arguing with his drunk son that he would never be too old to let his dad help him take off his clothes to go to bed, Scorpius was sound asleep. Well, not literally sound asleep. He was snoring, slightly, and murmuring in between, something about his birthday and cake.
"Up with you," Harry told him, though, he didn't expect him to move a single muscle. So, Harry had to pick Scorpius up, bridal-style. The boy didn't even complain the whole trip up to Al's room where Harry carefully put him down on the spare mattress next to Albus' bed. Pulling off Scorpius' tie and pullover, he left him lying there in his dress shirt and tight trousers. One of the boy's hands was curled loosely around Harry's wrist, holding on to him and though he'd been about to leave, Harry turned back to look down at him one more time. At the sight of Scorpius, sprawled out underneath him with his head tossed to the side and his collarbone exposed, Harry felt his mouth pool with spit and the space where Scorpius was touching prickle. Confused, Harry swallowed hard, at first wondering whether he'd also had too much to drink, but when Scorpius' fingers unconsciously grazed against his knuckles, the realization of what he was doing—getting aroused at the sight of his son's best friend—hit him, and he quickly pulled himself out of Scorpius' grip and left the room, closing the door behind him.
Harry was sure that he probably just had had too much to drink.
The second time he felt it, Scorpius was drunk. Again.
It was only about a week later when Hannah's furious head appeared between green flames and she shot him a look like he'd just called her beef stew chewy—a mistake he had made once, many years ago, and would never make again.
"Your son and his little friends are wrecking my bar!" She shouted at him and didn't even seem to notice that she had caught Harry at a bad time as he lay on his own sofa, in front of the TV, only in his pants with a bottle of beer balanced on his thigh. "Take them home. Now! Or I swear to god, Harry, I will serve you piss-warm pints for the foreseeable future." And like that, she was gone again, leaving the Floo to burst out ash all over his living-room floor.
Growling to himself, Harry stood up, put on his clothes and within a minute stepped through the Floo and into the Leaky Cauldron. At first, Harry was surprised at how empty the entryway was for a Friday night—usually he had to squeeze himself through the crowd to get into the main hall where he'd have to be lucky to find a seat. Today, though, everyone seemed to have gathered around the huge table in the centre of the pub on which—to Harry's absolute shock—Scorpius and two other drunk boys and one girl were standing. Or rather dancing.
Glued to the spot right next to the bar, Harry could do nothing but stare at the display of those four young people moving in tune to the blasting music, having the time of their lives as they twirled each other around and then fell to their knees just to jump up again, all perfectly timed to the music, which made the crowd that had gathered around the table cheer in admiration and excitement. Scorpius, out of all of them, looked like he was enjoying himself the most though he wasn't interacting much with the others while he held a pint up over his head with one arm and danced with closed eyes, swinging his hips to the melody of the song. With his head leaned back slightly and his silver hair almost sparkling in the dimmed light of the pub, Harry felt himself grow a little hard, just slightly, but that an 18-year-old boy had that effect on him still made him feel ashamed of himself, so he forced himself to turn away and quickly look for Hannah. He found her right by the side of the table, holding on to Albus and what seemed to be Rose, stopping them from joining the others on the table. Harry squeezed through the crowd, adjusting his robe to hide his disgraceful bulge and came to a stop next to Hannah, red-cheeked.
"Who decided 18 was old enough to let them make decisions for themselves?" She shouted the moment she saw Harry and pushed Albus towards him, who fell into his dad's arms, giggling and already shaky on his knees again. "I'm too old for this!"
"Have you contacted the other parents?" Harry asked and at that moment Ron appeared next to him, hoisting Rose up with a troubled smile on his face that read kids-am-I-right? and then he was gone again.
"Everyone except for Draco. He appears to be out of the country. You take Scorpius back with you, Harry!" Hannah spat and walked towards the table to grasp at the arms of the two dancing boys closest to her. Pulling hard, she screamed, "Down! Right now!"
Seeing that Hannah had her hands full, Harry looked down at his own son who was still grinning while leaning heavily against Harry's chest and it made him smile. However, he knew that tomorrow he'd have to have a serious talk with him and Scorpius about their behaviour.
"You stay here, Al," Harry shouted over the loud music and pushed Albus to sit on a chair at the side of the table, "while I get Scorpius." He didn't wait for his son's reaction but turned away immediately and walked towards the silver-haired boy who was now dancing to a much slower song but not any less enticingly. Harry looked around. Nobody else seemed as affected as he was—or they were just very good at hiding it—and he wondered why nobody noticed how inappropriately sexy this boy was. The way his hips were moving, with his arse pushing from side to side and his knees bend a little, it almost looked like he was grinding against something or… somebody. Harry felt his cock twitch at that thought.
"Scorpius," he called in his angry-parent voice, forcing these inappropriate thoughts out of his mind by pretending that he wasn't in fact at all impressed by the boy. "We're going home!" He was standing right in front of him now, looking up at Scorpius who finally opened his eyes and fixed his gaze on Harry. It seemed to take him a few seconds to realize who Harry was but when he did, his expression changed completely. Unfortunately, the sudden smile on his face in combination with his half-lidded eyes did not help Harry forget what he'd just been thinking about. Quite the opposite.
"Harry," Scorpius mouthed, or said, it was too loud to hear him with all the music and the cheering around them.
Harry held out his hand towards Scorpius, despite being afraid of what touching him right then would do to him, but instead of taking his hand to get off of the table, Scorpius let himself fall towards him and suddenly Harry had his arms full of the boy who was making him feel a very inappropriate sensation in his nether region.
His legs bent to hook behind Harry's back and Harry immediately slung his own arms around the boy's narrow waist to hold him up. For a moment, Harry couldn't move—utterly shocked at how suddenly Scorpius' whole body pressed against his.
"Take me home, Harry," Scorpius whispered right into his ear and if Harry didn't know any better, he could have sworn that he'd said it in a seductive voice. But since Scorpius was still a child and there was no way that he would ever be interested in someone as old as Harry, he decided that he must have imagined it.
And like that, Harry walked towards Albus, Scorpius in his arms and feeling his whole body prickle with electricity. Holding on to Scorpius tightly, with his arms wrapped around his bottom, Harry pulled his son up from the chair and they flood home together.
After he had left the two in Albus' room, tugging them into bed like children, Harry sat on his own bed, breathing heavily at the sight of the bulge in his pants that no other than clumsy Scorpius Malfoy had caused by dancing like a fucking sex god.
"I'm going crazy," he murmured to himself before he let arousal take over and he jerked himself off to the fantasy of Scorpius' hips moving and those grey half-lidded eyes fixed on Harry's.
The third time Harry felt it, months had passed, and if Harry was honest to himself, it wasn't even the third time he'd felt what Scorpius' touch did to him, just the third time that Harry dared admit it to himself.
It was two weeks before Scorpius and Albus' training at the Ministry was supposed to start and Harry had walked into the kitchen, early in the morning and ready for a cup of coffee before he was to Floo over to the office, when he'd found Scorpius crouching in front of the oven and staring into it. The boy was only dressed in loose boxers and a white loose shirt in which he usually slept. His bed hair was tousled into all directions.
"Good morning, Harry," Scorpius said when he heard Harry step towards the coffee maker. Smiling up at Harry like that, Scorpius looked dangerously adorable. "I'm making breakfast muffins. They should be done in about," he turned his neck to look at the muggle clock on Harry's wall and then his smile spread into a grin, "now! Let's get them out." Harry helped Scorpius by handing him the oven mitts and making some space on the counter to put the muffin tray.
They looked delicious. Round, puffy and orange and smelled like cinnamon, pecan nuts and carrots. Scorpius must have seen him staring at them and licking his lips at the delicious smell because he snickered before he whipped out his wand from where it had been stuck right at the side of his boxers and cast a quick cooling charm on them. Putting his wand to the side, he took one of them out from the tray with careful fingers and then turned towards Harry, presenting it on top of his hands. "Tada! For you, Harry."
It took all of Harry's self-control at that moment not to lean forward and kiss Scorpius. His heart was beating so fast, it felt like it was flattering and would fly out of his chest at any moment in the form of small embarrassing hearts which read Scorpius Scorpius Scorpius .
"Thank you," he said instead of jumping the boy and then took the muffin with shaking fingers, his knuckles brushing against Scorpius' palm and sending a spark right to his crotch. Harry flinched but made sure not to look at that brilliant smile that made him want to do anything to make sure Scorpius would never stop showing him that smile until the day he died.
Oh, Harry was fucked.
"Go on, taste it," Scorpius sang happily, and he seemed confident that Harry would like it, which Harry didn't doubt either, just based on the smell and the fact that Scorpius had made it and presented it like that to him. He could probably have given him a muffin made of gillyweed and slobber worms and Harry would have still devoured it with gusto.
In the end, they did taste delicious. Obviously. The taste was almost underwhelming, though, compared to the feeling that spread through Harry's whole body the moment he told Scorpius that he liked them and the boy smiled again, so bright and beautiful. Harry could only return it while trying very hard not to squeeze the muffin in his hands.
The last time a person had made him feel that way he'd been 18 and just gotten together with Ginny after the war and they'd spent weeks, no, months together, not leaving each other's side, bathing in the feeling of being alive and happy, which had been a first for Harry—and for the longest time he'd been so sure that he would never feel that kind of joy again. But now it was back and Harry didn't even want to think about how much pain having these kinds of feelings for a boy not half his age would cause him in the long run.
They could only end in heart-break.
Harry's face fell and he let himself fall onto one of the kitchen chairs as the excited fluttering was replaced by dull pain that he was only too familiar with.
Grief. Grief caused by losing something or someone important to him. But in this case, something he had never had and would never have in the first place.
Scorpius was still standing there, now carefully picking all the muffins out of the tray and arranging them on a plate. After he finished, he put it in the middle of the kitchen table and finally looked at Harry again. He pulled his brows together at the sight of him. "What is it?" He was glancing at the muffin in Harry's hands of which Harry had still only taken a single bite and Scorpius' expression of wonder turned into worry. "Is something wrong with them?"
"No," Harry replied quickly, not wanting Scorpius to think he had anything to do with Harry's sudden change of mood, although, technically he had, but not in a way that he thought. "No, it's nothing, I was just thinking about work," he lied.
At first, it didn't seem like Scorpius believed him because his eyebrows were still pulled together in a frown, but then he summoned two mugs of coffee, a muffin for himself and sat down in front of Harry.
Quietly, they sat together, eating and drinking and Harry saw Scorpius glance up at him every few seconds, a small smile on his face. It almost seemed like he wanted to say something, his mouth opening but then closing again or taking a bite of muffin before he looked away again. They were probably both uncomfortable but for different reasons. Harry because he felt guilty for having these feelings for the boy, and Scorpius maybe because of the sudden change of atmosphere between the two of them.
"So," Harry started after what seemed like forever but couldn't have been more than a few minutes of silent chewing, "you like to bake?"
Scorpius' worried expression lifted from his face at the mention of baking and he exhaled loudly. "I love it. My mum taught me. We used to bake together all the time when she was still alive."
"That's nice," Harry thought and smiled back at Scorpius. "She must have been a good teacher because these are possibly the best muffins I've ever had."
When Scorpius blushed at the compliment, Harry wasn't prepared for it. His whole body reacted at the warm shower of emotions that spread from his heart to the tips of his toes and fingers.
"Yes, she was. And thank you. They're also my dad's and my aunt Daphne's favourite."
"Starting today you can add me to the list of old people who love your muffins," Harry laughed and then looked at the time and realized that he was already a little late. Standing up, he almost didn't catch the frown on Scorpius' face.
"You're not old, Harry," Scorpius said, and he also stood up and took their empty mugs to place them in the sink, turning back to face Harry immediately after.
He almost automatically replied, "I'm much older than you, for sure," even before he realized that it was a little strange how seriously Scorpius was taking Harry's comment about his age.
"Older, yes, but not too old," Scorpius said and crossed his arms. Silently he added, "for me." And then he was blushing again but trying to hide it by turning his head to the side and coughing.
Harry stared at him wide-eyed and tried to think of what the boy could have meant by that because he could only think of one meaning and that just couldn't be it. Scorpius had never given him any reason to believe that Harry's inappropriate feelings were returned. If he had, Harry surely would have noticed since he'd been paying more than a necessary amount of attention to Scorpius during those last few months. If Scorpius was interested in him, romantically, Harry would know. And he didn't, so… that was that.
Still, he blurted out, "Er, I'm late for work," like an idiot and watched Scorpius sigh.
Finally, Scorpius looked up at him again, maybe a little disappointed, but Harry wasn't sure he could trust his own judgement anymore. Then the boy nodded and Harry left towards the Floo, a weird feeling in his heart.
After that encounter in his kitchen, Harry couldn't stop feeling it. Even when Scorpius wasn't touching him.
Despite Albus and Scorpius' training at the Ministry having started and them consequently spending less time at Harry's flat, Harry saw Scorpius all the time. He came over to visit after work more often than not, and even at the Ministry, though they worked in different departments, the young Malfoy was impossible to overlook with his mop of silver hair making him stand out anywhere. Whenever Harry caught sight of him, he couldn't help but feel a little excited, like a teenager in love for the first time coming across his crush at school.
After that muffin incident, Harry also noticed that Scorpius often made comments that, at first, sounded like he was flirting with Harry—however, Harry still doubted that Scorpius did that intentionally.
Like that one time at lunch, on a cold December day, when Scorpius had turned to Harry and said, "Every time I hear that song All I Want For Christmas Is You I have to think about you." Even Teddy and Hermione, who'd been seated with them and heard the comment, had looked up from their food and glanced between the two men in wonder. For a few seconds, Harry had been struck silent, swallowing hard and feeling that weird electric tingle in his throat that had made him want to say that he felt exactly the same. But then he'd remembered that a few years back Scorpius had been over at their place around Christmas time and helped them decorate the Christmas tree. They'd listened and sung to Christmas music during and maybe that specific song had played then too and that's why it reminded him of Harry. Right , that must have been it.
Or a different time, when Scorpius and the other Ministry trainees had been sent to the Department of Law Enforcement to familiarise themselves with their procedures, and there hadn't been enough space for everybody to sit, so Scorpius had walked up to him and whispered, "I wouldn't mind sitting in your lap," and then waited for Harry's reaction. Blushing furiously, he'd stammered, "Er, I don't think that's a good idea, er," before Scorpius had sighed and settled with one thigh on Harry's arm rest instead.
Another time, Scorpius hadn't really said anything, but when he'd walked in on Harry standing naked and dripping wet in front of his shower, he'd just stood there with lingering eyes for way too long before he'd made a step forward. But then, apparently, Scorpius had changed his mind—whatever it had been that he had been planning to do—apologized and closed the door again.
When Harry thought about it, objectively, he did come to the conclusion that maybe Scorpius was interested in him after all. In that way. But even if that was true, which Harry just couldn't believe, didn't matter how many hints Scorpius was dropping, it didn't mean that he should approach the boy because there was still that small problem of Harry being a hundred years older than him.
However, it was a few months after Scorpius and Albus had finished their training at the Ministry that things started changing between them.
Albus had moved into his first own flat then, more like a hole than a flat, really, right at the corner of Diagon Alley and with that Scorpius' visits had stopped. For the first few weeks, Harry had thought it was for the best. Seeing Scorpius often left him little space to breathe and try to get over the boy—now turned man.
Still, at the Ministry, they walked into each other every other day. Scorpius had started working in the Potions Department right after their training and he was responsible for keeping track of the potions inventory of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement among others. At least twice a week he would come by to check their stock and discuss orders and changes with Harry. At first, Harry had thought it wouldn't matter because even if he'd continue to be in close contact with Scorpius twice a week, the meetings with the former inventory assistant had always been rather short and boring and, surely, as long as they kept it professional Harry's feelings would slowly fade into nothing.
But they didn't...
Not even after years, when Scorpius had let his hair grow out until it almost reached his chest. Usually it was tied together with a ribbon, at the back of his neck, like Draco wore his hair. The first time Harry had noticed that Scorpius was growing up to look more and more like his dad, Harry had been relieved. There was nothing about Draco that attracted him after all, and maybe seeing the boy and being reminded of the man he'd hated for the better part of his life—though, admittedly, since the whole time-travel incident during their sons' fourth year, the two had buried the hatchet and now occasionally met up for drinks—would do little to help his feelings for Scorpius blossom into more. He had better chances now than ever to get over his inappropriate attraction for the young Malfoy. Or so he had thought. Strangely, Scorpius looking more like Draco with every passing day didn't really change anything. Harry still felt his heart flutter at the sight of him, he still kept glancing around during lunch, secretly hoping to catch a glance of that silver-blond ponytail.
It took him a while to realize it, but when he did, Harry felt more frustrated with himself than he had in a while.
It didn't matter how Scorpius looked. He would always be attracted to him, always have these feelings for him as long as he was… Scorpius.
That's when Harry decided that he had to do something about it. Actively. So, he invited Chéri out on a date. She was a former Auror of the French Ministry who had recently moved to London and was now working with Albus in the Department of Mysteries. Albus had introduced them to each other half a year ago, telling Harry how she also loved Quidditch, that she was a great cook and was looking for someone to grow old with. Just like Harry. Back then Harry had just smiled at his son's cute attempts to set him up and never called him up on any of his offers to introduce the two. But then, after Harry had decided that it was time to get over Scorpius, he had asked his son to introduce them after all.
And that's how Harry and Chéri had ended up together in muggle London, seated at a cosy table in the corner of a French restaurant.
"So, Harry, tell me, how did you find this place?" Chéri was asking, after the two of them had finished sharing their dessert and Harry was trying his best to smile throughout everything. He hated sharing food, everybody close to him knew that, but when you meet someone new and they ask to share a Crème Brûlée it was hard to say no without sounding like some kind of selfish jerk.
"My good friends Dean and Seamus come here regularly. They recommended it to me the last time I saw them," Harry said and forced himself to look the woman in the eyes instead of uncomfortably glancing down at the table where her fingers had sneaked up on Harry and intertwined with his.
The last time Harry had held someone's hand it had been Scorpius'. They had waited for an elevator together after lunch, and Scorpius had stood beside him chatting about the new ink his department had bought upon his request. Harry still remembered it like it had happened yesterday because he had thought how cute it was that something as simple as ink could make Scorpius that happy. And then Scorpius had taken his hand, completely unconsciously, and Harry had been too excited and flustered to pull away and they had gotten onto the elevator like that and held hands until Scorpius had had to depart a stop before Harry's.
"Well, tell them thank you from me, the food was excellent," she purred but not inappropriately. It was more like the natural purring effect a French accent had on the English language. It reminded him of Fleur which made him think of Scorpius because their hair was almost the same shade of blond. "As was this evening. I would hate for it to end yet. How about we go over to my place?"
"Oh, er," Harry started and swallowed. He felt an uncomfortable blush take over his cheeks, "it's pretty late already and I'm rather tired." And even though he really wasn't interested in doing that with her, at least not yet, he regretted declining her immediately because he saw her face fall and with it her hand pulled away.
Merlin, he was bad at this. Dating. Flirting. Being subtle.
"I understand, I'm sorry if that was too brazen." Chéri looked nonchalant but she couldn't hide the disappointment from her voice.
Harry felt awful. Had he been supposed to go along with it? Even though it was their first date? Even though he was in love with someone else?
"No, not at all," Harry lied but shut his mouth when he saw her reach for her purse and jacket. He should have probably stopped her, but he didn't. He hadn't even noticed that she had left money for the food on the table and when the waiter came to take his payment, Harry felt even worse.
The next day, Harry and Scorpius had their usual Friday morning inventory meeting and though Harry had tried to forbid himself from looking forward to it or think about it too much, it was the only thing that kept him from turning into a puddle of self-pity at how horrible he'd acted towards his date the evening before. Harry had found that somehow the electric feeling he now associated with Scorpius had a soothing effect on his mood.
There was a knock, right on time, like always, and Harry exhaled slowly and swished the door open with a movement of his wrist.
"Morning Scorpius," Harry said, his lips already moving into a smile before he saw the look on the man's face. It was something he had never seen before and at the same time it looked so incredibly familiar because once again, Scorpius reminded him so much of Draco.
Harry didn't like it.
"Are you serious?" Scorpius asked, after he'd come to a halt right in front of Harry's office desk. His arms were crossed over his chest and he was glaring at Harry, like he hadn't in a long time. Or, actually, ever. Scorpius had never glared at him like that before. Not even the one time Harry had accidentally dropped the popcorn he'd bought for them the first time they'd gone to the cinema together, just the two of them, and Scorpius had sulked about it until he had fallen asleep with his head resting against Harry's shoulder for almost half the movie.
"What… did I do?" Harry asked, surprised at his own choice of words, but it was obvious that Scorpius was mad at him specifically, the flaring nostrils and the tapping of his foot a clear sign.
"Albus told me you had a date with that floozy from his department. What was her name? Chilli? Chally?"
"Oh, right," Scorpius moaned, drawling out the last word with a gaze that surely could kill if he just let it, "Chéri . Excuse me for getting the name of your new girlfriend wrong. How rude of me."
"She's not my, er, girlfriend," he started explaining but somehow it was hard to work out what to say when he didn't know what was going on, "What's wrong?" Getting up, he walked around the table to stand next to Scorpius who looked even more angry now, if that was even possible, and it also looked like he was hurting himself by digging his well-manicured nails into his own biceps. Concerned, Harry reached out to pull his hands away but Scorpius flinched back, flashing his teeth.
"What's wrong? " Scorpius repeated sarcastically, the volume of his voice so loud that Harry worried people walking by the office might hear, "I've been waiting for you for 4 years, Harry. 4 years! I thought there was something there. I thought if I just gave you enough time, surely, you would get over whatever has been stopping you from pursuing a relationship with me." Harry watched him with wide eyes as Scorpius suddenly let his hands fall to his sides and he asked quietly. "But then you start dating someone else?"
His head was spinning.
Obviously, Harry was missing something. Because as much as he'd always loved Scorpius and as much as his subconsciousness had tried to read everything the boy had done or said to him as a sign that Scorpius loved him back, none of it had been real or even close to the truth. It couldn't be. Because Harry was just Harry, old, divorced, abandoned, again, as it should be, as it always had been, and there was no way that someone as perfect as Scorpius could ever love him back.
But how Scorpius was staring at him now, eyes close to tears, looking like his heart had been broken, Harry wasn't so sure anymore.
"I thought you loved me," Scorpius whispered and when Harry didn't react immediately, he added a small and painful, "I guess I was wrong."
And then he was turning to leave and Harry watched the first tear roll down that beautiful pale cheek and something inside him snapped.
He reached forward, pulled Scorpius towards him by the arm and when the other man was about to make a sound of protest, Harry shut him up, by pressing his lips against Scorpius'.
That electric shiver went through his whole body again.
Warm and soft, Harry continued to kiss him, thought, Scorpius wasn't kissing him back and if Harry hadn't been so desperate, he would have probably read that as a sign that Scorpius didn't want this to happen and stopped kissing him. But then, when Scorpius suddenly made a small suffering sound in the back of his throat and closed his mouth around Harry's upper lip for the first time, Harry knew that he'd made the right decision.
They were kissing for the first time and Harry couldn't remember kissing ever having felt this good. No, well, he could remember having liked it as a teenager and how exciting it had been, but it had never been that all-consuming, and he had never felt so incredibly weak in the knees just from feeling someone's tongue against his.
This was all Scorpius' fault.
It felt like forever before Harry was having trouble breathing and consequently had to slow down a bit, going back to soft and lazy movements of his lips against Scorpius' before they stopped altogether, just panting at each other with half-lidded eyes.
"I love you," Harry then said, out of breath, exhausted, his whole body feeling electric, "I'm sorry I made you wait."
Scorpius was staring at him, right in the eyes. "Better late than never," he said, leaning his forehead against Harry's and closing his arms around Harry's waist, "But now you better fuck me on that desk."
And, obviously, Harry did as he was told.