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When sunflowers bloom

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June 1st, 1998

The air that hung around them was muggy. Thick and heavy, stagnant. Jimin’s mouth was heating up. His lips molded into a pair that was equally as hungry as his; Taehyung. He loved when they did this, whatever this is. Ever so often they’d get tangled in sheets, glistening with sweat, hands frantic and desperate for touch. And God forbid this loveless affair would stop. He whimpers into Taehyung’s neck. Legs interlocked around his waist, his mouth now nibbling on Taehyung’s ear. “Fuck Tae so good, mmm fucking good,” he groans. Jimin knows how much Taehyung loved when he was vocal. When he incoherently mumbled in bed, moans that would crescendo, the way he’d whine- please Taehyung, please make me cum. I’m so close, s-so close.

There was beauty to this, sloppy wet kisses in the heat. Two bodies aching for release, pleasure evident in the shaking of legs and uneven thrusts. The lust and dominance and obedience that ensues knowing that it stemmed from two tongues dancing to the pounding hearts of a pair of concupiscent teens. Seventeen and messing around, bodies pressed against each other without a care that maybe, just maybe, they’re a tad bit too young to be doing this. They’d do this thrice a week,sometimes even more, and have been for nine months now. God, it’s just sex feels so good. Nine months ago Jimin and Taehyung were nothing but two virgin best friends but look! Now they can’t get their hands off each other. Sweet sin. This is fucked up. 

Ah, Taehyung I’m- mmm s’close, I’m coming.” 

“Make a mess baby, make a mess for me."

Just like that, both of them enter a realm of bliss and carelessness for everything in the world but their own orgasms. Taehyung’s load stains the walls Jimin has wrapped around him. It was always like this with the both of them. Lazy days turned to let’s-fuck-days and they dirty Jimin’s sheets. Mom’s barely home anyways, and I do my own laundry. Seventeen and tainted with lust.

-

Nine months ago

“No strings attached okay Jimin?” 

“Well duh. You’re hot, you’re my confidant but nothing more than that.”

“Good.”

“Fuck me already.”

He was sex, pure sex. 

-

June 1st, 1999

Summer comes around again. A familiar atmosphere in the air as Jimin steps into his front lawn. The smell of sun and dew greeted him as a taller, tan-skinned boy stares at him from across the lawn. “You’re looking good today,” said boy compliments. “Oh shut up, you always say that Tae,” Jimin states matter-of-factly. Taehyung just giggles as he walks over to Jimin, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. Jimin used to hate the fact that his best friend is taller than him but soon grew to love it. He loves when Taehyung would help him reach for whatever he needs from the top shelf in the grocery store or when Taehyung lets him rest his head on his shoulders on the bus ride home after a long day at school. He loves Taehyung, so much. He often wondered if he did so more than a friend when they were younger. But as they continued to grow up together, they both realized that their love had a limit. 

Jimin met Taehyung in kindergarten and stuck with him since. They’d have play dates every other day in either one of their houses when their parents found out that they only lived two houses down from each other. Since they resided in a small neighborhood in Seoul, they were enrolled in the same elementary school, and of course, the same middle and high school. Jimin remembers when they were twelve and hid under a slide in the playground and shared their first kiss. Okay, well Taehyung kissed him on the cheek and not the lips, but that’s still a first kiss right? He remembers feeling ashamed and guilty because it was wrong, was it not? They both are boys after all. So he avoided his best friend the next day, only to be greeted by a tear-stained Taehyung at his front door begging to talk to him. 

“Why did you avoid me today at school? Are you mad at me? What’s wrong, Jimin?”

“Y-you kissed me Tae!”

“So?”

“Don’t you think it’s wrong?”

“No. I liked it and I did it because I love you Jimin.”

“O-oh. I, I liked it too, Tae. I don’t know if I love you though. Aren’t we too young to date?”

“You’re so silly! I love you as a friend Jimin! You’re like my soulmate, a platonic one.”

“Right ...my bad.”

They both made up, went upstairs to Jimin’s room and read comics under a fort they made out of pillows and boxes. It was one of their favorite things to do. That, was elementary. The kiss was long forgotten and it was never repeated. At fifteen, nearing the end of middle school, Jimin and Taehyung talked about how they felt about their sexuality. How they were both gay and felt no shame in it. They both wondered if they loved each other beyond friendship, and so they stole each other’s proper first kiss that same afternoon. It felt good, amazing, but they both laughed afterwards. “My soulmate and first kiss is you, Park Jimin, but you are not my first love.”  Jimin chuckled at his best friend’s statement. “Likewise for me, Kim Taehyung.” 

“Hey Jimin did you hear me? I’m getting a chocolate cone, what do you want?” Taehyung elbows Jimin at his side to get his attention. “Huh? Oh, just my usual strawberry sundae,” he replies. Taehyung makes their order and pay the cashier before they both took their ice creams and sat down at a table next to the diner’s big glass window. “What were you thinking about?” Taehyung inquired, licking at his chocolate cone. Jimin just shrugs, “Just thought about when we first kissed because we thought we may have been in love.” Taehyung stares at Jimin, one eyebrow arched up. “You’re not falling for me now are you Jimin? We can’t be fuck buddies if you do becau- Ow!” Taehyung exclaims. “Why’d you kick me?” Jimin rolls his eyes as he takes another scoop at his sundae, the strawberry ice cream sweet on his tongue. “I’m not in love with you Tae, I just thought about it is all. And stop bringing up the fact that we fuck in public!” This time, Taehyung is the one to shrug his shoulders.

They’ve been friends, or best friends, with benefits for the past year and nine months. Not that Jimin was counting, okay maybe he was , but he wouldn’t have it any other way. He could never picture himself loving his best friend any more than he does now, and he knows that Taehyung agrees with that. They both helped each other with anything and everything, including their sexual desires, but they both agreed to let each other sleep with other guys. Surprisingly, there are many other gay and bisexual guys in school. Like, Yoongi, who has already graduated high school and is starting out in college. Jimin has slept with him multiple times before he graduated. There was also Hoseok, who has slept with both Jimin and Taehyung individually. The three of them may or may not have had threesomes. Hoseok was nineteen and in his last year of highschool. A senior. Besides those two, they've both had their fair share of one night stands. But regardless whoever else they slept with, Jimin and Taehyung loved the sex they both had most. They were each other’s favorite comfort-fucks and I’m-horny-let’s-fuck-fucks and nothing could change that. Hopefully , though,someone could change that.

-

“You’re such a good boy for me now, aren’t you Jimin?” Taehyung growls as he mercilessly pounds into Jimin from behind, his grip tight on Jimin’s waist. It was sure to leave bruises on the latter’s pale skin, but Jimin loved it. He loves looking at the bruises to remind him of the dirty things he had done with Taehyung. It never failed to send a shiver down his spine and a smile to his plump lips. He loved the idea of losing and giving up all control to Taehyung, knows that when he does, Taehyung would take care of him and pleasure him. “Tae, I’m close,” Jimin whines. “You’re not coming yet.” 

Jimin yelps as Taehyung flips him onto his back without pulling out. “No, Tae, please I need to cum, please I beg of you. I’ve been a good boy.” Jimin grinds down onto Taehyung’s dick, impatient and disliking the fact that Taehyung had stopped thrusting into him. Taehyung slaps him across the face. “Did I say you could move? You say you’re a good boy and beg so desperately for what you want and yet disobey me?” Taehyung wraps his slender fingers around Jimin’s dick and pumps up and down at a frustratingly slow pace. He presses his thumb into his slit harshly evoking a high-pitched whimper from the smaller male. “Beg for it, Jimin. What do you want from me? You needy slut.” Jimin’s eyes open at the mention of the degrading name. Slut. Yes, that’s right. He was Taehyung’s slut.

“I-I want to cum from your dick Taehyung please. Please use me to feel good please.” Jimin whimpers softly. “Hmm, I’m not very convinced. I don’t think you want this that much huh?” Taehyung removes his hand from Jimin’s dick and pulls out of him quickly without warning. Jimin gasps. “No please Tae, please. I beg of you. Use me, please fuck me hard with your delicious cock. I’m your little slut for you to fuck, so please just fuck me!” Taehyung groans as he takes in the way Jimin looks. Cheeks flushed a deep shade of pink and lips swollen from the deep kisses shared, the head of his cock an angry red, precum already leaking out. He looked so sinful. “Fuck,” Taehyung sighs as he shoves his cock back into Jimin, thrusting at a brutal pace. “You like this don’t you? You need this hm?” Taehyung’s voice was low and husky, he was breathing hard as his large hands finds its way to Jimin’s neck. He presses down tightly on Jimin’s throat. “Mmm T-Tae” Jimin whines, tears forming at the corner of his eyes. He feels a sting on his thigh, the pain and pleasure going straight to his aching dick. 

Taehyung slaps him on his thigh again with his free hand before growling, “You feel so good Jimin, always so good for me. You can come when you need to.” Jimin’s eyes close shut at hearing the permission granted to him. Tears slowly trickle down his cheeks. “I’m gonna cum Tae!” Jimin arches his back as he lets the familiar feeling in the pit of his stomach overtake him, his cum spurting out of him and unto his belly. His mind goes blank and he feels like he’s floating. God, sex feels so good. This feels too good. Taehyung continues to pound into him, chasing his own release. After another minute or so, he releases deep inside Jimin who was now shaking from sensitivity. 

“Jimin? Hey, baby you okay?” Taehyung asks, voice soft. Ah, so sleepy. “Was I a good boy?” Jimin mumbles. Taehyung chuckles, “Yes Jimin-ah. Such a good boy, always my good boy. Come on, let’s get you cleaned up.” Surely, nothing could feel better than this, life couldn’t get better than this. Jimin was doing well in school, he has amazing friends, an even more amazing best friend and a loving family. He loves that it is summer, finally, he loves the sun on his skin and the rain that kissed the heat away when it came. Loves the dew in the morning and his mom’s tteokbokki that she makes for breakfast. He loves walking to school with Taehyung and rushing home right after while his parents were still at work just so he and Taehyung could play a dangerous game behind locked doors. 

He loves how Taehyung calls him pet names in bed and manhandles him, only to clean him up after and cuddle. They’d then talk about their day and their plans for tomorrow. Jimin loves this little secret they shared. It may have almost been two years since it started, but the fun and pleasure was such a drug and they both couldn’t get enough. Jimin just wonders though, if he could ever love sex with someone other than Taehyung in the future. What if he couldn’t? No that can’t be. He’d just have to wait and see.

“All done and clean. Come here and let me hold you Jimin.” Jimin scoots in closer to his best friend on his bed. His bed was next to the window and despite being pressed into Taehyung, he could still look out his window. Every summer, his mother would plant sunflowers, and after they’d bloom and mature to develop seeds, his mother would sell them. Everyone loved her sunflowers. She grew the best ones. From his window Jimin could see them. They were growing, although they have not bloomed yet.

Jimin would find someone to love right? He’d find someone he’d sleep with because of love, wouldn’t he? He was afraid, he truly was. Everyone seemed to love his body, even Taehyung. And sure his best friend loved him for who he was, but would anyone want him romantically? Jimin sighs as he lets his eyes flutter close, breathing in the familiar scent of Taehyung as they both drifted off to sleep. Someday, maybe someday, he’d find someone to love him and cherish him truly; take care of him like newly planted sunflowers.