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For The First Time

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"You sure about this?" Ray's doing that thing where he's trying to keep his voice casual, but Mikey can tell he's worried.

"Actually... no. I've changed my mind. You're not putting that thing anywhere near my ass." Mikey grins, pulling his t-shirt over his head. It catches on his hair, fucking it up. He doesn't care.

"So fucking funny, aren't you?" Ray grabs the front of Mikey's jeans and pulls him in close, dipping his head until their noses brush. His voice drops low, "I'm trying to make sure you're okay, and you're being a dick about it."

"Yeah, 'cause you're so offended." Mikey smirks, closing the gap between them and kissing Ray hard, like he means it. Because he does. He wants this, wants Ray. He's ready.

Ray's hands slide up Mikey's back as they kiss, settling warm on Mikey's back—warm and big. (Big hands, you know what they say.) Mikey moans into the kiss, giving tongue, and curls his fingers into Ray's shoulders.

He's ready, he knows it. He's not some scared little virgin, he knows what he's in for. And it's not like he and Ray haven't done everything else - fingers, hands, mouths. He knows how to suck cock and he knows how to do it the way Ray likes it. He knows how it feels to have something in his ass, and he fucking loves it. So what if Ray's dick is bigger than most? It'll just make everything that much more intense.


He deepens the kiss, clawing at Ray's t-shirt, so ready for this to be started. He's got the house to himself tonight; Gerard's off with Frank and their parents won't be back until tomorrow. Mikey's been waiting for a night like this. (Fuck, he's so over waiting.)

They have to break the kiss to get Ray's shirt over his head. At first Mikey 's impatient to get Ray's mouth back, but then he gets an eyeful of all that skin. Without really planning it, he's running his mouth down Ray's neck, over his chest, loving how Ray has hair where Mikey doesn't, firm muscles where Mikey is lean.

Then his hands fumble on Ray's belt buckle and Ray is not helping at all, just standing there letting Mikey do all the work.

"C'mon," Mikey groans, frustrated. Buckles shouldn't be this complicated and he yanks harder at it. "Fucking help me already."

Usually Ray would have a comeback, something witty and funny. He's obviously just as far gone as Mikey is because all he manages is a breathless apology before his hands join Mikey's and the buckle finally releases.

Mikey skates his mouth back up Ray's neck, catching Ray's lips in another kiss just as he manages to get Ray's jeans open. Ray's groaning into Mikey's mouth as his hand finds its way into Ray's briefs, getting a grip on his dick.

Ray breaks the kiss, panting, "Fuck, Mikey. Fuck."

"That's the plan," Mikey says. He smiles smugly, and strokes Ray slowly, feeling his dick get harder in his hand. It makes it feel even bigger and a tremor of excitement laced with fear goes up Mikey's back. "Did you get the stuff?"

Ray takes a few deep breaths before answering. "Yeah. Yeah, damn Mikes that's good...uh. It''s in my backpack."

There's sweat beading on Ray's lip and his eyes are squeezed shut. He's breathing hard, every breath making his chest shift, curls around his face already damp with sweat. Fuck, Mikey loves him like this, when it's just them and Ray forgets to front. He just opens up and lets Mikey see everything he's feeling.

Mikey strokes him a little firmer when he whines, but not faster. He wants Ray riled up, sure, but not that riled up. He wasn't kidding about the fucking.

The whole reason they've waited so long - aside from lack of an opportune location - is mostly Ray. He had this whole big thing about how they had to be sure and how Mikey had to be okay with it, not feel pressured etcetera, etcetera. As if Ray would ever pressure anyone to do anything. It's not like Ray is that much older than him. And Mikey is totally the age of consent (in most states).

The point is, Mikey wants. Mikey fucking wants. And he's waited long enough. So when Ray's hands slide low, squeezing his ass through his jeans, Mikey doesn't hesitate. He kisses him once more, hard, and ignores the disappointed noise Ray makes when Mikey lets go of his dick to shuck off his own jeans. He doesn't bother trying to make a show of it, he's not hot enough for that; he just slides his jeans and briefs down in one shove, kicking them away.

When he looks up, Ray's eyes are on him, huge and heated, looking up and down his body.

"What?" Mikey asks, confused. It's not like Ray hasn't seen him naked before.

"Nothing." Ray flaps a hand, his cheeks getting a little pink in that way that usually makes Mikey want to tease him. "I just—" He sighs, shaking his head a little. "You." His voice is so soft that it's nearly a whisper.

Mikey shrugs, feeling like he's all elbows and awkward knees. "I know I'm not much to look at."

Ray shakes his head, so fast and sure his hair blurs. "No, you don't get it. You are." He takes a step forward, big hands coming up to cup Mikey's face. "You are so..." Ray's brow furrows, like he can't find the words. "I just. I don't get why you're with me, when you could do so much better."

"Bullshit." Mikey throws back, without even thinking. Because, really, what is Ray on? With his thighs and his chest and his ass filling out jeans in a really amazing way that does nothing to stop Mikey from thinking they should be coming off right about now.

He takes matters into his own hands and grabs them at the waist, tugging downwards until they puddle around Ray's feet.

"Less talking, more fucking," Mikey says. He covers Ray's mouth with his own before Ray can answer and kisses the fuck out of him, walking him backwards to the bed. Mikey's bed. Where they have, on occasion, gotten pretty fucking physical, but not this.

Not this. Not yet.

Mikey breaks the kiss, impatient. "Get your fucking underwear off." He turns and walks bare-assed across the room to rifle through Ray's backpack for condoms and lube. When he turns back around, supplies in hand, he nearly drops them. Ray's just standing there, awkward and naked and gorgeous, his hard-on standing out from his body.

Mikey has no idea how Ray can be so oblivious to how hot he is, especially when he's not wearing clothes. He tells him as much as he slides onto the bed, rolling onto his back and unscrewing the cap on the tube of lube. He squirts some over his fingers, spreading it around.

When he glances up, Ray's staring at him, motionless. "You're just gonna...?"

"Yeah, I am," Mikey says. He shoots Ray a tiny smile and spreads his legs, pulling his knees toward his chest.

He can feel his face flushing as he lowers his arm, sliding it underneath him so his fingers can slip between his ass cheeks. It's so intimate that he's fighting a burn of embarrassment, but it's worth it to see the look on Ray's face as he watches Mikey slowly, gently, finger himself.

Mikey's cock is pressing into his stomach, hard and demanding. Soon he'll take care of that. For now he adds a second finger, breath catching at the stretch. He can't keep his eyes off Ray, at his face and his hard cock, the pearl of moisture he can see collected at the tip. Fuck. He wants this now.

"Why are you so far away?" he asks, the words hitching out of him. As much as he's trying to pretend to be in control here, he's still on a razor's edge.

"Oh," Ray says. He shakes his head like he's just woken from being hypnotized and steps over to sit on the bed carefully, by Mikey's foot.

Mikey adds another finger. He's breathing hard now, little moans slipping out. Doing it with Ray watching turns every sensation up to eleven, sharpens every pulse of pleasure. He can't help rocking back against his hand. Fuck. Fuck, he wants it.

"You should put a condom on," he says. His voice comes out gravelly and shot. Sexy.

"Yeah," Ray breathes, still watching and not moving. He keeps staring at Mikey, his fingers clenching on his thighs like he's trying not to touch.

"Ray?" Mikey prompts, raising an eyebrow. That shakes Ray out of it, finally. He says "sorry" three or four times and grabs for the box of condoms, trying to pull one out and getting four. He smiles sheepishly at Mikey and tears one off.

They're Magnums, of course.

It takes a Ray a few tries to get it on and he fumbles a lot with the lube, spilling some on the sheets but getting most of it on his dick. It looks like his hands are shaking, but the condom looks good so Mikey doesn't mention it. He just slides his fingers free and wipes them clean on the sheets. "Come here."

Ray's leaning over him, Mikey's legs hooked over his shoulders, when Ray asks, "Are you sure?"

"You're not that big, you know. Okay? Just fucking do it already," Mikey says. He rolls his eyes and reaches down between them to find Ray's cock. His fingers slip over the slick condom, but he manages to get a grip on it and guides Ray where he wants him until the blunt head of Ray's dick presses at his hole. So close. All he has to do is push in.

"I want it, okay? I want you, just. C'mon." Mikey's voice is shot, breathy and giving away too much of what he's feeling. He wills Ray to just fucking listen and go with it already and maybe the world owes him, or maybe Ray just can't hold back any more, because he does. He starts to push in, slowly, slowly and fuck, he's big. Bigger than Mikey's fingers. There's a stretch to it, an edge of pain. Mikey bites his lip, breathing through it.

Ray pauses, "You okay?"

Mikey nods, "Just keep going."

"You sure-"

"Just. Keep. Going." He's proud of how level his voice is and thank God, Ray listens. Mikey closes his eyes, the stretch fighting against the pleasure just for a little while, but he can take it, he can—

"Mikey?" Ray's voice is a whisper. Mikey realizes he can feels Ray's balls against his ass and he's in. All the way in. And oh Jesus fuck he's full. He's so fucking full.

"How does it feel?" Ray asks.

"Good." Mikey pants. "Intense."

"Too much?" Ray asks, concern growing in his face, above Mikey's. They're so close that Ray's fro is a curly halo for both of them.

"No. Not too much." Mikey reaches down to grasp Ray's hip and pull, get some movement. "You should move. You should fuck me."

"Are you-"

"Yes, I'm fucking sure. Come on."

Ray's trembling a little and Mikey realizes just how much he's holding back, how much it's costing him. When he starts to move it's slow -- so slow -- but Mikey pushes his ass back, tugging on Ray's hip to make him go faster.

Eventually, he does, snapping his hips up into Mikey. Ray's mouth covers his, kissing him wet and hard and desperate. He doesn't go crazy with the thrusting, just a steady pace. It's not too hard and fuck, it's good. It's so much better than Mikey thought it would be. Mikey groans; he's getting fucked and he loves it. Fucking loves it.

Ray shifts a little, balancing on an elbow so he can reach between them and jerk Mikey off. Mikey's eyes roll back in his head and he has to break the kiss, melting back onto the mattress and just taking it. Ray's dick in his ass; his hand on his cock, bringing him off; Ray's voice panting in his ear, curses and groans and Mikey's name over and over.

"I want you to come first," Ray pants. That just about makes Mikey's heart want to burst and he is not going to have any trouble with that request. He rocks back on Ray's dick, pushing up into his hand with a groan. It feels fucking awesome.

His eyes flutter open and there's Ray face right above him, watching him. His expression is so warm it twists Mikey up inside. "Fuck, Ray." He feels like he has to say something, but he doesn't know what. He ends up groaning Ray's name, and Ray quickens the pace a little. It's nothing breakneck but oh God, it's enough. It's too fucking perfect.

Mikey's body stiffens, his hips bucking up into Ray's hand, feeling it right through him every time Ray pushes home until it's too much for him to hold off any longer. With one more twist of Ray's hand he's coming with a groan. He only catches flashes of Ray's face through his fluttering eyelids as his body stiffens and he moans, shaking with pleasure as he shoots between their bodies, warm onto his stomach.

Ray makes a desperate noise and kisses him hard and wet, sucking on his lips as he thrusts. He groans and starts fucking Mikey, really fucking him – not too hard, just letting go, letting himself take what he wants. It's beautiful to see him lose control and fuck, Mikey wants it for him. He wants to feel him come.

He's about to open his mouth and say so, come, come inside me, I want you to, when Ray does. His body goes still over Mikey, his face creased up in that look; the one he always gets right before he comes, the one that Mikey loves. He can feel the pulse in his ass as Ray tips over the edge, keening out a gorgeous noise and falling forward onto Mikey, his arm giving way.

Mikey runs a hand down Ray's back, feeling the damp skin under his fingers. They lie there for a long moment, trying to catch their breaths.

"Fuck." Mikey breathes, feeling awed, "That was. Yeah. Wow."

"Wow." Ray echoes, giggling a little into Mikey's neck, which sets Mikey off snickering. "Wow. We really did that."

Mikey hums in agreement, and it comes out deep and content. He lies boneless while Ray withdraws and climbs off the bed to trash the condom.

Ray comes back straight away, sliding in on his side beside Mikey. He leans in close, dropping a kiss on Mikey's mouth that's almost chaste.

"You okay?" The question is painfully earnest, which is Ray all over.

Mikey sticks his lower lip out, thinking. His ass feels kind of tender but it's not that sore. He's still buzzing a little with aftershocks, which is pretty cool.

"Yeah," Mikey says, his mouth tugging into a smile. "Yeah, I'm good." He rolls closer to Ray and catches his mouth in a real kiss, slow and lingering and little sloppy. "I could get used to this sex thing. We should totally do it again."

Mikey can see Ray trying to fight the giant smile that stretches his mouth. It doesn't work.

"Yeah?" Ray asks. He sounds a little unsure, like it's too good to be real.

Mikey fights the urge to roll his eyes and whispers, "Yeah." He cups Ray's jaw and kisses him deep and slow, sucking on Ray's lips the way he likes it. When he breaks it they're both a little breathless and his voice is shot. "You're a good fuck, Ray Toro."

Ray drops his eyes, his cheeks turning a little pink, but his smile is beautiful. Radiant. "So are you, Mikeyway."

Mikey just giggles. Like there was ever any doubt he would be.