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A Night That You'll Always Forget

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Shizuo could tell it was one of those days as soon as he fumbled a nearly full carton of milk out of his fridge directly onto the floor, wasting almost all of it. 

Work, predictably, was no better. Then everything just got worse when Izaya decided to show up and make a nuisance of himself. Shizuo had to chase him all over Ikebukuro before he finally disappeared somewhere near the border of Shinjuku. Then he had to walk all the way back home in the rain. The damn pest probably knew it was going to rain and timed it so Shizuo would get caught in it. 

To try and salvage his day, Shizuo stopped at a nearby convenience store on the way back, because it wasn't like he was going to get any wetter, to pick up a new carton of milk and a few things to help him relax. This afternoon he was going to relax before he put a hole in his apartment wall. Again. 

Really relax. 

On the couch. A big glass of milk on the coffee table. A box of red velvet Oreos balanced on his chest. A cigarette dangling from his lips. His celebrity crush on the T.V. with a replay of “Tidying Up” playing at low volume.

That damn dirtbag Izaya always had to make his life worse. Things aren’t great but they'd be much better without him . Yeah, Shizuo’s job pissed him off all on its own but Izaya always makes everything worse. 

Shizuo takes a deep drag and tries to stop thinking about the shit Izaya's done. Maybe even forget Izaya for just a little bit. 

Relax. 

Izaya's damn, smug face. 

Relax. 

Izaya's taunting, snide voice spinning lies and drawing out insults. 

Relax

His long, black coat billowing behind him. 

Relax…

Shizuo's falling asleep quickly. Izaya-

R e l a x…


Shizuo's lying naked in a moss garden and it's so soft. So soft and so quiet. He opens his eyes to see cherry blossom petals suspended in the air around him. He can only see a hundred yards or so in any direction before the petals appear to be so dense they make up a pale pink mist. There's the faintest sound of wind chimes in the distance but he can't work out where they're coming from. As far as Shizuo can tell, he's completely alone. 

The moss makes a thick bed beneath him and dulls the sweet scent of cherry blossoms with an earthy note. It's such a soothing blend. Shizuo takes a deep breath in through his mouth and can taste it. One by one every muscle in his body relaxes as he exhales. He inhales again and a single petal lands on his tongue. It dissolves like sugar and tastes like dark red cherries. 

His heavy eyelids fall closed as they were the only part of his body that felt any strain. Without his sight, Shizuo’s able to focus on the new pleasant, tingling warmth that spreads from his tongue out across his face and down his whole body. 

When Shizuo blinks open his eyes again to inhale another flower petal, he’s no longer in the moss garden.

He's laying on a sun-warmed floor in a paper house. The are no more distinguishable petals in the air, only a sweet pink mist continues to surround him, and a tiny moss terrarium sits at his feet. 

Shizuo figures he just outgrew the moss garden. 

The wind chime sounds closer so Shizuo turns his head to see where they are. They’re strung up to his right on an open porch that overlooks another, large moss garden. Or maybe just… a moss garden that’s Shizuo-sized again? He thinks about getting up and looking around to see if he’s in another terrarium but he's comfortable where he is. The air tastes like petals and the room is empty except for the wind chimes, the little moss terrarium he outgrew, and himself. So again, he closes his eyes. 

A moment later he's disturbed again by a gust of sweet air in his face. His eyes flutter open to see an oddly familiar figure lounging beside him, the source of the sweet air. Despite his rest being disturbed, Shizuo's oddly okay with it. Maybe because the air tastes so sweet. Maybe because the person it’s coming from is so beautiful. 

“You grew awfully big.” The person says. 

“Yeah.” Shizuo finds himself agreeing easily. He guesses he did grow a lot. 

The male figure sits up straighter. The large white kimono patterned with fluttering cherry blossoms he’s wearing slips down his pale shoulders. The silk pools at his elbows, revealing a beauty mark that decorates his left shoulder. His hair is short and black and his eyes are a gentle, mesmerizing light pink. 

Shizuo tells this person: “You're beautiful.” Because it's true. 

“Yes,” The man laughs, his voice like wind chimes. “Did you like being in my garden?”

The man gestures to the moss terrarium that’s still at Shizuo’s feet.

“Yes,” Shizuo responds automatically.

They share peaceful silence for a while. The man exhales pink petal mist and watches as Shizuo breathes it in. In turn, Shizuo relaxes as he smokes the man beside him. It takes several long moments for it to occur to Shizuo to ask: 

“What's your name?” Even when he finally says it, it doesn't seem like a very important question. 

“Sakuraya.”

Shizuo nods. Sakuraya seems right to him. 

Sakuraya shifts his weight to one arm as he leans forward over the top of Shizuo. With his free hand, he brushes Shizuo’s blond bangs back from his forehead with his fingertips. Shizuo’s eyes flutter as he feels the light touch of almond-shaped nails. Sakuraya’s cool fingertips then trail down over the curve of Shizuo’s cheekbone to trace his jawline.

“I made you grow to be so big.”

“Yes.”

His hand trails down Shizuo’s neck to his bare chest, reminding Shizuo that he’s naked. Shizuo watches passively as Sakuraya leans in closer and presses the very tips of his parted lips to Shizuo’s. The touch is so feather-light it almost tickles.

They both are completely still as Sakuraya breathes out mist and Shizuo inhales it directly, perfectly synchronized.

After some time Sakuraya finally tilts his head to slot their lips together for a proper kiss. He tastes like dark red cherries and it feels right. Whatever piece of Shizuo’s mind that’s still thinking says that it’s natural for Shizuo to be kissing this beautiful person. After all, this is Sakuraya.

Sakuraya slithers forward to lay on top of Shizuo's naked body with one hand still pressed to his chest and the other still braced against the floor, his kimono slides over Shizuo’s bare skin like warm bathwater. Compared to Sakuraya’s light body the layers upon layers of fabric that make up his carelessly worn kimono are heavy. Sakuraya feels as though he hardly weighs more than a few sheets of paper and a part of Shizuo is worried that Sakuraya could float away without the kimono anchoring him to the ground. So, Shizuo wraps his arms around Sakuraya's waist to make sure he doesn't flutter away in the next breeze that tickles the wind chime. 

Sakuraya moves on top of him, slow and using the texture of Shizuo's skin for traction like a snake. He straddles Shizuo's hips and caresses his bare chest with his paper fingertips. Sakuraya’s lips fall back by just a hair and he stares at Shizuo's face through half-lidded eyes. Shizuo finds that he doesn't mind being stared at for once. 

Sakuraya’s fingers trail up his body to brush over the highest points of Shizuo's face. Down his nose, across his cheekbones, riding along his jaw to his chin and across relaxed lips. 

“I grew you for me.”

Shizuo nods. It makes sense to him. He grows plants in his own apartment for the company. 

“I want you,” Sakuraya says. His voice is soft but sure. “I will have you now.”

Despite the bold choice of words, there's absolutely no aggression in his tone. If he were speaking another language Shizuo might think he was making small talk, exchanging pleasantries with an acquaintance. But that's because what Sakuraya's saying is as simple and obvious as pleasantries. 

Shizuo nods again and it might be agreement or understanding. Shizuo doesn't feel as though it matters too much either way. Shizuo's agreement was always a mutual understanding. Never a question for either of them. 

Sakuraya’s hand trails down Shizuo's body, over his chest and along the line of his hip bone. All the way down to the partial erection Shizuo didn’t notice he had. The touch is light enough to be teasing but Shizuo feels no sense of desperation. Because Sakuraya had said he would have him now. 

Sakuraya shifts so one leg is between Shizuo's. His thigh is pressing pleasant pressure to his balls. His fingers curve delicately around Shizuo's cock and drag up slowly, coaxing Shizuo fully hard. With his other hand, Sakuraya eases his kimono down past his elbows to pool as his waist. Shizuo's breath hitches at the exposed skin and a sudden rush of uncertainty that ripples through his relaxed state. 

“You’ll float away,” Shizuo says as a warning and his only protest. 

Sakuraya laughs easily but doesn't deny it. 

“Not yet.” He replies as his only reassurance. “Touch me.”

Shizuo's moving slowly, trying to decide where he wants to hold Sakuraya until there's another breeze and Sakuraya's hair flutters. Then Shizuo is moving quickly to grab the back of Sakuraya's thighs and steady him as the wind catches in the open areas of his kimono like a sail. 

Sakuraya laughs again as Shizuo holds him still against the breeze. Shizuo doesn't know if Sakuraya would really blow away or not and Sakuraya's reaction doesn't answer anything. He seems steady but Shizuo doesn't want to risk it. 

The breeze passes and Sakuraya hums, looking down at Shizuo with his eyes half-lidded. He rocks forward against Shizuo, his soft thigh rubbing enough heat against Shizuo to make him huff out a low groan. 

“Big and strong…” Sakuraya hums in Shizuo's ear, drawing the tip of his tongue over the shell of it before pulling back just enough to trap Shizuo's eyes. “Just for me?”

Shizuo looks back and Sakuraya feels so familiar. Like he hasn't been able to take his eyes off him for years. 

“Yes…” His breath hitches as Sakuraya's fingertips catch on the head of his cock. “Just for you…”

Because Shizuo is sure that's true. He has no business being this big and strong if it’s not for Sakuraya. Sakuraya is the one who grew him, after all. 

Sakuraya’s fingertips trace up the underside of Shizuo’s cock again causing his breath to hitch. 

“Touch me.”

Sakuraya tells him again. 

Shizuo takes a deep, shuddering breath of Sakuraya before carefully moving one hand to touch the inside of Sakuraya’s thigh. The delicate flesh is only exposed by the barest sliver peeking through the thick folds of the loose kimono. The skin is warm and soft there and it must be so sensitive because Sakuraya’s breath hitches followed by a puff of a more dense cloud than before. Shizuo slides his hand up Sakuraya’s thigh as the silk of the cool kimono pours over his wrist. He massages Sakuraya’s thigh with the sort of gentle touch he never remembers having the confidence to do. His hand climbs higher, disappearing under the fabric completely as he drags his fingers up the slight curve of Sakuraya’s manhood. Sakuraya trembles under Shizuo’s touch and his misty, half-lidded gaze catches Shizuo’s once more.

“More than that…” He purrs. 

Shizuo wraps his fingers around the slender length. He’s transfixed by those pink eyes that display every shared passion and pleasure between the two of them as Shizuo’s sense of fulfillment seems directly tied to Sakuraya’s. 

Soon, it really is as Sakuraya’s hand grips Shizuo’s erection to mirror his movements. The two of them share in steadily mounting heat. Des pite the slow build their enjoyment is so perfectly synchronized it’s unreal. Except it is real. Or, it’s as real as Sakuraya and Sakuraya must be real because someone had to make Shizuo grow.

When their foreplay reaches its peak Sakuraya waves away Shizuo’s hand to take over again. A distant part of Shizuo’s brain is expecting Sakuraya to prepare with deft fingers to stretch out so the next part goes just right… but then Sakuraya is just raising his hips to line himself up. Shizuo can’t remember why he thought the stretching would be necessary. Where did he see that before?

The tight, wet heat of Sakuraya encompasses Shizuo’s length and he forgets that there ever was anything else. The arch of Sakuraya’s back and the low, drawn-out moan for the first insertion is strangely graceful. Despite Sakuraya’s tiny body, he’s able to slide down Shizuo’s cock smoothly. Like they do this all the time.

Maybe they do? It seems like they do and Sakuraya feels so familiar. 

Shizuo feels com pletely at ease surrendering his body and pleasure to Sakuraya. Sakuraya bounces in Shizuo’s lap rhythmically and Shizuo worships him. Precious moans fall from those tender lips followed by the candy pink clouds that make Shizuo so dizzy and lethargic even as he’s more aroused than he’s ever been. 

There’s a bright flush down to Sakuraya’s heaving chest that’s so vibrant in color Shizuo almost doesn’t notice the kimono fluttering around Sakuraya as the breeze picks up again. Rather than laughing with the windchimes, a higher moan comes from Sakuraya as Shizuo once again grips his thighs tightly to keep him from blowing away.

“Ah, Shizuo… my dear beast…” Sakuraya sighs with pleasure as he drops down more jerkily than Sakuraya normally moves.

Shizuo gasps and tenses as that suddenly gives shape to something that was lost in the sweet fog. But he can’t quite make out what it is.

“You’ve been mine so many times… with so many different faces…”

Shizuo shakes his head in confusion. The once natural feeling of belonging to Sakuraya has been polluted by that one word: beast. Even so, the pleasure keeps building to an inevitable climax.

“It doesn’t matter if it’s love. We can’t ever stay away from each other.”

Release completely dominates Shizuo’s senses as he comes. His orgasm and the desire to remember the meaning of Sakuraya’s words keep him from noticing how the wind suddenly picks up and then…


Shizuo wakes up with a shitty crick in his neck from sleeping folded over in his couch. He jerks his head to crack his neck and grunts from the pain before massaging the sore muscles. He has no idea what he was dreaming about, only that there are ashes and crumbs all over his bare chest and he has a hard-on. Shizuo scratches his head, trying to remember it for a moment, then gives up.