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Ian: Mom! MOM! Dad’s been shot!

HIC: *SNORES* I WAS TOTALLY NOT SLEEPING JUST NOW!

Ian: Dad is dead!

HIC: How dead?

Ian: Dead enough to cause Feferi to go blind.

HIC: That’s pretty dead.

Ian: I’ll say. It kinda seems medically impossible.

HIC: Oh no, I’ve looked this thing up. People die from getting shot all the time.

Ian: What?! No- No, I meant the blindness.

*Awkward silence*

Ian: Ya know what, forget it.

HIC: Done and Done. Unfortunately, the economy isn’t doing so hot right now, so I can’t afford to hire you a new Dad.

Ian: I don’t think that’s how it works.

HIC: Well I got to do something. Child Services is going to kill me if I lose another kid. Why don’t you go stay with that cousin of yours? You two seem to get along well.

Ian: She and Jake lit our slip-n-slide on fire.

HIC: I said well, not great.

Ian: WHILE I WAS ON IT!

Jane’s House, Backyard

Ian, carrying Feferi piggyback: What’s with all the dead people?

Jane: Oh, they’re not dead. They just tried to sneak in and got hit with tranq darts.

Jake: Hey, Ian. Ya know what would suck? Getting cut off mid-sentence!

Ian: What on Earth C are you talking about? And where did that even come fro-

OPENING: COLORS by Flow