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Hate That I Love You

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Hate That I Love You - 1



His name is Han Seungwoo and I hate everything about him.


I hate that he’s the guy who has it all. I hate that he’s got a chiseled face and a god-like body to match it. Hate that his mouth is sometimes like it’s made from honey, sweet and tempting – a constant torture to my poor mind. Hate that everything that comes out of it, either words being spoken or lyrics being sung, is too sweet for anyone’s sanity – especially mine. Hate that he’s an effortless social butterfly who attracts people easily, but doesn’t leave the socially awkward me behind.  

I hate that despite being polar opposites in every aspect in our lives, he doesn’t really seem to care about it. Because I am his friend. And the thing that I hate the most about him, is that I love him. I love him despite being only a friend to him. It breaks my heart and that’s why I hate that I love you, Han Seungwoo.

- Park Yoonhye

“What’s going on?” someone pulled my earplugs and I automatically closed my notebook.

I looked back at him, knowing full well that the person who disrupted my train of thoughts is also the one who consisted them in the first place.

“Ya! Han Seungwoo!” I plastered an annoyed look on my face, despite feeling not one bit annoyed at him.

He sat down beside me and placed the earbuds he removed from my ear into his. “You’re writing again.”

It wasn’t even a question. He knows that when I’m listening to some classical music, it means that I’m writing.

“Yes. After having a writer’s block for a few weeks, I’m finally writing again.” I smacked my notebook onto his head, hoping what I just wrote – my feelings – will reach him. I almost grimaced at that thought. “But then you had to go and ruin the moment.”

“Ow!” Seungwoo said as he massaged the top of his head and winced. I didn’t hit him that hard, but considering the thickness of my notebook and it being hardbound, it was still enough to cause a little bit of pain to him.

Nothing compared to how much hurt my heart has experienced throughout the years.

“That notebook of yours can be a lethal weapon it should be banned.” He squinted his eyes at me and then to my notebook.

Instinct and self-preservation has me hiding my notebook immediately – inside my shirt.

Seungwoo’s eyes squinted some more as he looked at you suspiciously.

“Hmm.” He said as he put his hands on his chin, as if thinking of something way off. “Are you writing some racy stories now?”

That earned him a punch to the shoulder from me. “Yah! Han Seungwoo! What do you think of me?”

“I think you’re a great best friend. And that, sometimes, I think you could be a serial killer in hiding.” Seungwoo smiled sheepishly after saying the last words.

I made a face at him. “I think the sun has fried your brain. Would you like me to buy one for you?”

“Can you add some mustard and ketchup to that?” He snickered at his own joke.

“Ha. Ha. Very funny.” I clapped mockingly.

He suddenly shifted positions. Seungwoo was suddenly lying down with his head on my thighs – thank God I don’t wear shorts! – and the movement caused the earphone attached to my ear to fall off.

“Oops! Sorry ‘bout that.” Seungwoo picked up the fallen earphone and put it back to my ear.

‘I also hate that he can effortlessly make my heart race without him knowing.’ I made a mental note to add that to the list of things I hate about him as I feel my heart speeding up because of what he just did.

“Let me sleep here for a while, Yoonhye. I stayed up late last night ‘coz I had to study.” He crossed his arms above his chest and closed his eyes.

“Well, you didn’t have to stay up late if you studied weeks before the Finals and not the day before it.” I reminded him. He has this habit of putting off work he can do today for tomorrow.

“Hush, Mom. Your son is trying to get some sleep.” And then he didn’t say anything anymore.

Seungwoo’s breathing relaxed and after a few minutes, I knew he fell asleep.

I looked at our surroundings. We were in the fields of the school grounds. I can see some students playing soccer in the center, some running around the tracks while some were practicing high jumping. The school’s annual sports fest was coming so everyone’s practicing for the games that are about to be held. I should be practicing right now as well, for archery, but I don’t think I’ll be able to go to the practice hall anytime soon since there’s this guy sleeping on my lap like it’s his favorite pillow. He even turned sideways, towards me, and readjusted himself before resuming his sleep.

My phone suddenly rang and I hurriedly answered it so that I won’t disturb Seungwoo.

“Hello?” I asked.

“Yoonhye, where are you? Coach is looking for you.” One of my teammates for the archery team in our department said on the other line.

I looked down at the still sleeping Han Seungwoo and hurriedly made an excuse that I can’t come to practice today.

“Sorry but I can’t come today. Can you just cover for me?”

I heard Yuri sigh from the other line. “Is he with you?”

Even without hearing the name of the he she was referring to, I knew exactly who she was talking about.

“Eung(Yes). So, please just cover for me this one time, ne?”

“Fine. But just this once, okay? We need to practice. The nursing department has this new ace they’re talking about. We can’t lose to them. Not this year when it’s gonna be our triple crown for the archery competition, and our last competition before we graduate.”

I chuckled. “Okay. Okay. I’ll make sure to practice on my own somehow, just so that we can get that Triple Crown you’ve always wanted.”

“See yah around! Make him fall for you! Mwah!” toot toot toot

Yep. Yuri is also a close friend of mine. She knows that I am in love with Seungwoo. She also knows that I hate how much I love him.

“Triple crown, huh?” Suddenly, Seungwoo got up and stretched his arms.

“How was your sleep, dear son?”

“Pretty good when you’re not trying to lecture me.” He suddenly put his arms on my shoulder. I tried my best not to tense up since I should be used to him doing this to me all the time – all part of being his best friend. “Plus, your things are as soft as my pillows at home.” The man even had the gall to pinch my cheeks before standing up.

I looked up at him. I just hate how I look up at him and the sun shines even brighter behind him. New note. “Where are you going?”

“Practice. I joined futsal this year.” Seungwoo said as he offered me his hand.

I looked at him and raised my brows, not quite believing him. “You? Joined the futsal team? After not playing for most of our college lives?”

“Well, it’s not like I stopped playing outside of school. Plus, our team sucks. Hangyul and Seungyeon can’t even lift up their heads when you girls from the archery team are around.”

I laughed as I took his hand to stand up.

“Well, sometimes when you have an ace like me and Yuri, it’s hard to lose.” I shrugged my shoulders as if it wasn’t that big of a deal.

“Yeah well, the soccer team now has an amazing and good-looking ace. So this time, I bet there’ll be a turn of the tides.” He said as he posed, showing off his amazing jawline.

I rolled my eyes. Do not drool. I repeat. Do not drool!

“Keep on dreaming, Han Seungwoo.” I pushed him and picked up my things. I removed my notebook from inside my shirt and immediately put it inside my bag.

“What’s so important about that notebook of yours?” He asked, eyeing my bag – which I held onto very tightly.

“Nothing you’ll ever know.” I stuck my tongue out and ran away.

“One day, Yoonhye, one day I’ll know the contents of that notebook of yours!” He shouted towards my way as he ran towards me.

“You can try.” I stuck my tongue out and ran even faster as he chased me, making sure that I won’t drop my bag like it’s my lifeline.

I watched his practice, which was thankfully in the other building and not in the same building as where my archery practice is being held. Girls from around the school probably heard that ‘God Seungwoo’ of the Medical Department finally joined futsal this year, so they were very crowded in the practice hall despite it only being a practice.

“God Seungwoo! God Seungwoo!”

“Seungyeonie Oppa! Fighting!”

“Lee Hangyul-ssi! I wanna call you Oppa but I’m 2 years older than you!”

“OMG! The Holy Trinity of the Medical Department all in one place!”

I had to stop myself from rolling my eyes at what I’m hearing. I just wanted to plug my earphones in and shut everything out.

I was about to pull out my earphones from my bag when someone sat beside me.

“Hey, Noona.” It was Kim Yohan, from the same department. I think he’s classmates with Hangyul. I don’t really know him that much aside from him always participating and winning in the Taekwondo competition. I heard he was offered to become part of the National Taekwondo Team, but he declined saying that being a doctor is what he dreams of.

“Hey, Yohan. How was practice?” I asked just to make a friendly conversation. I didn’t wanna sound rude.

He smiled. “It’s okay. Same old same old.”

“No injuries this time?” I asked, recalling that Hangyul once told me that Yohan injured his left foot last time.

“Nope. Wouldn’t wanna give up the title to another department this year.”

“That’s good.” My thoughts drifted from our conversation and onto the playing field when Seungwoo scored a goal.

They were playing 4-on-4. Seungwoo, Seungyeon and Hangyul along with a freshman with fluffy cheeks I haven’t met are teamed up together. While the others, I have completely no idea who they are. I only know Seungyeon and Hangyul because they are close friends with Seungwoo, so I guess I can be forgiven for not being able to name the rest of the team.

“I guess Hyung is really playing this year.” Yohan said as he looked at the field as well.

“Looks like he really is.”

And the cheers erupted once more as Seungwoo’s team scored another goal.