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The Dark of You

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Memories are a fickle thing. They only exist for as long as you can hold onto them. Sometimes you’re able to recall them at a moment's notice. Other times, they’re set aside, long forgotten, until some kind of recognition sparks your recollection and it all comes back to you like puzzle pieces fitting together.

Trying to hold onto the memories of your life while you slept was like trying to catch smoke. The more you tried to keep them close, the more they seemed to escape you. They were quickly replaced by animalistic urges that you couldn’t quite understand, and yet, somehow it felt right. 

What you once referenced as emotions were now something else entirely. Similar to feelings, but now it was deeper - consuming your very soul… if you even had one. Fear, anger, longing, grief, and so much more were circulating through your internal system, triggering a carnal need to act on your urges; to satiate them in any way possible, consequences be damned. 

Something was prodding at you - a thorn in your side so to speak. It was gnawing at your subconscious telling you to collect yourself and to become alert. Flashes of foreign images crept into your mind that were drawing you in, making you want to investigate. Violence, blood, fear, distress - a perfect concoction for your ideal situation, one that you desired to immerse yourself in. 

A tingling sensation crawled across your skin, distracting you from your beautiful dream. It wouldn’t cease, causing you to stir, pushing the images further and further away in your subconscious. You wanted to chase them - to relish in them like snuggling under a warm blanket, but as soon as you felt you had a grasp on them, they faded, and you began to regain consciousness. 

Your eyes flickered open, focusing on your dark surroundings. The air around you was thick and humid with a staleness you found yourself enjoying. The sounds of droplets of water verberating off of the stone walls around you mixed with the whistle of wind making its way through the cracks in the foundation of your underground den were like a haunting symphony, calling you back to life. 

“You’re awake.” 

A voice like silk beckoning you back to life cut through the air, making your entire body shiver with desire as you turned to address the alluring sound. 

Staring back at you were two beautiful blue eyes shining brightly in the darkness, the edges crinkled from the grin adorning his face. There was a certain sinister gleam in his eyes, but also a longing that you could feel in the very depth of your body, calling out to you with a desperate need. 

This was familiar to you. The absurdity of it all was alarming, and yet comfortable. The creature that stood before you brought back feelings that you had not only recognized, but also delighted in. However, the word escaped you. There was a name for him - a category that he had fit into that you couldn’t put your finger on. 

As you continued to struggle to place him, odd feelings crept into your mind that didn’t feel like they belonged given your current situation. Wickedness, lust, hunger, and just a genuine giddiness that consumed you to the point that you couldn’t help but feel calm and placated as you strained to remember how you knew this being. 

You noticed by his expression that he was determining the reason for your hesitation. That’s when a word started ringing through your mind repeatedly. 


Realization washed over you like a tidal wave, forcing the air out of your lungs as you released a breath that you didn’t realize you were holding. You lifted yourself from the bed, your bones cracking with stiffness as you stretched out your limbs, aching from being still for such a lengthy period of time. 

In an instant, you were in front of him, trembling slightly as you lifted your hand to run the soft pads of your fingers along the red line etched in his skin, running from above his brow line down to his lips. Your fingertips lingered on his pillowed lips as your eyes searched his. They were blazing back at you, changing from blue to golden and back to blue in the blink of an eye. 

“Pennywise.” The name fell from your lips like a song, so fitting and so right. 

Before you could stop yourself, you lifted your heels to enable yourself to reach his face as you pressed your mouth against his in an urgent, needy kiss. His tall stature made it difficult for you to reach him, so you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer, to which he obliged happily. 

Your tongues toyed with each other as you relished in the flavor of him - sweet and bitter all at the same time, and so deliciously familiar. You couldn’t recall how you met or how you came to be, but one thing was for sure… you ached for him, and clearly he felt the same. 

Bright red suddenly fogged your vision, enveloping you in a need to follow it and harness whatever harm followed it. You broke the kiss ,somehow immediately sensing that Pennywise had the same inkling to chase after the high that was calling you elsewhere.

He smirked at you, extending his gloved hand out to you, which you took without hesitation. Allowing your mind to lead you, your body morphed to travel through the air on another plane of existence, placing you directly where you had sensed the overwhelming brutality occurring. 

The stench of fear and hatred was overwhelming, mixing together like a cocktail that you wanted to gulp down and savor. Taking in your surroundings, you had emerged on a riverbank. Looking up, you had noticed a bridge adorning the river, which also revealed a gathering of a small group of humans - the source of what you were craving. The smell of blood was heavy in the air, hitting your senses like a freight train. Your initial reaction was to investigate further, but your mate gripped your wrist tightly, spinning you around to face him. 

A low growl rumbled deep in your chest at his audacity to stop you when you were preparing yourself for a hunt, but he didn’t seem fazed as he crept low to the ground, mentally requesting that you do the same. 

Internally debating with yourself, you decided that he seemed to know what he was doing, and you should follow his lead. Lowering yourself into the brush alongside the riverbank, you stood still, looking to your mate for your next move. “Stay,” was all he uttered before slithering away like a snake further up the bank closer towards the bridge. 

Moments later, a large splash echoed under the bridge, followed by shouting and jeers from the humans. You looked closer to see that the majority of the group had scattered, leaving behind one man who was very visibly upset and calling after whatever had landed in the water. 

Focusing your attention, you saw a man struggling in the current, feeble and weak from his interaction with the others. His partner continued to cry out to him from the bridge, screaming, “Adrian” at the top of his lungs. You could smell the blood from the wounds of the man called Adrian. who was now floating down the river, headed in your direction. 

Movement in your peripheral vision had distracted you, drawing your attention to a lanky figure approaching the river. It took you a moment to realize that it was Pennywise. He was skulking around the brush, climbing on top of a rock above the water right where the suffering human was being swept towards. 

Pennywise extended his arm towards Adrian, who was struggling to stay afloat due to his injuries. Your mate’s eyes were beaming a yellow glow that glimmered under the night sky. He bared his teeth as Adrian got closer and grinned with malevolence when he finally made contact and gripped the helpless man tightly before the current could take him away. 

You watched with fascination as Pennywise hauled his unsuspecting victim out of the river, draping Adrian’s arm over his shoulders for support. Adrian’s  partner was shouting at them from the other side of the river, a mix of relief and concern on his face as he watched helplessly from the opposite bank. 

Pennywise smiled at his prey’s worried partner from across the way, his lips splitting his face into a malignant expression before his eyes rolled into the back of his head and his jaw unhinged wide enough for his multiple rows of teeth to jut out and rip into the chest of the battered victim hanging from his shoulder.

The scent of blood, fear, and despair was overwhelming as you ached to join your mate, trying to keep yourself planted as Pennywise swallowed down the flesh, winking at his victim’s partner as he shouted for help, not yet coming to terms with his lover’s fate.

In a fraction of a second, Pennywise was standing before you, still holding the bloody corpse in his arms. Saliva started to spill down your lips and over your chin at the sight of his organs, now shredded to ribbons beneath his ribcage, still warm with life. 

Your mate dropped the remains in front of you, wiping the back of his hand over his mouth in an attempt to clean up the blood, only to have it smeared more dramatically across his painted face. “Feed,” he instructed. 

Not having to be told twice, your teeth jutted forward, elongating from your gums in multiple rows of sharp, jagged fangs. You tore into the flesh easily, fighting the urge to moan as the flavor of his fear and agony lingered over your taste buds. 

By the time you had finished, all that remained were a few fragments of bone and clothes. Licking the blood from your lips, you glanced up at Pennywise, whose pride and adoration could be sensed inside your mind. You stood up, coiling your fingers around the fluff of his collar, pulling him closer to you. “Thank you,” you murmured, nuzzling into his chest. You had noticed that your voice was raspy and hoarse from not speaking for such a prolonged period of time, but you were quickly distracted by the way his silky apparel caressed your check. It felt soothingly familiar, igniting more images that sped through your mind in uninterpretable fragments. 

The sound of his voice brought you back to the present, interrupting the thread of memories that flicked in and out of your mind. “Come with me,” he urged, taking you by the hand and leading you up the river towards the bridge. 

Unsure of why you weren’t leaving the scene of your slaughter and going back into hiding, you followed your mate, confident that he knew what he was doing. Though your mind was scattered, there was one thing you felt in the depths of your spirit… and that was how much you loved this creature. You would follow him anywhere, regardless of where he was leading you. 

The thought comforted you as you approached the underside of the bridge next to one of the large pillars constructed for support. Pennywise turned to you and said, “You might feel this,” before revealing his elongated claw on his pointer finger. He dragged the sharp end along his wrist, cutting his flesh open until blood started to seep through and raise into the air. 

Moments later, you hissed in pain, staring down at your wrist to see that it had been cut into. The wound was identical to the one that Pennywise had inflicted onto his own skin. He then gripped your arm gently, inspecting the gash in your flesh as your own blood dissipated into the air. He grinned at the sight before his eyes flickered to yours and remarked, “We’re connected.” 

You swallowed thickly, not entirely sure what that entailed, but you were sure that it wasn’t entirely a good thing. It was already obvious that the two of you were mentally connected by the way you could so easily read him and interpret his thoughts and feelings without having to speak, but to know that your very life-source was linked together was something else entirely. 

Sensing your distress, he leaned into you, kissing your forehead gently before dipping his face into the crook of your neck, nibbling softly and littering your skin with love bites. “You’re not in any danger,” he promised, whispering against your chilled flesh. “We are eternal. We are the Eater of Worlds. Nothing can harm me, and in turn, nothing can harm you. You are safe with me.” 

Something about his words rubbed you the wrong way. Part of you knew that he wouldn’t ever hurt you, and you could feel the power that lay dormant within the both of you. Yet, another side of you was bothered - as if you knew how ruthless he really was and that his tenderness wasn’t a common occurrence. You couldn’t determine the reasoning behind your uneasy feelings, but you tried to push those thoughts to the back of your mind, knowing that Pennywise would be able to sense your troubled thoughts. 

Leaning away from you, he placed a gloved hand over your bleeding wrist and with a swipe of his hand, you were healed. He smirked at your bewilderment before taking his other hand and doing the same action over his own wrist. 

Still confused as to what his purpose was for all of this, you remained silent as he brought both of his bloodied hands to his lips, one hand containing your blood, and the other containing his. With a wink in your direction, he aimed at the large brick pillar and blew into the palm of his hands, causing the blood to lift from his gloves and glide through the air and onto the pillar. 

“W-what are you doing?” you asked, hesitantly. The sound of your own voice startled you. Something about it was off - more light and also more sinister than you could remember. Though, to be fair, you couldn’t remember much of your life at all before your rest, so you could have been imagining things. 

As the blood started to gather and take shape on the stones, Pennywise’s expression changed to one of resentment and bitterness as he stared at the blood, willing it to form into what it was that he wanted. 

His lip curled as he answered you, spitting out the words with a venomous bite. “Sending a message.” 

Bemused by his response, you were startled by the overwhelming sense of hatred circulating through his mind. Wondering who could have been the cause of his animosity, you noticed that the blood had finally finished taking shape. Glaring back at you were two subtly profound words that repeated three times down the length of the pillar, beckoning Pennywise’s foes. 


Chapter Text

The hunger surging throughout your body had been temporarily satiated from your meal by the river. However, you were still feeling restless. Unable to determine the reasoning, you curled up into a ball on the cold cave floor with your arms wrapped around your legs while your head rested on your knees in a feeble attempt to calm yourself. 

A quiet tension fell between you and your mate ever since you had teleported back to the cave. It bothered you that you couldn’t recall your life before your long rest, and you knew that Pennywise could sense your unease. 

He crawled over to you, emerging from the darkness, his movement similar to that of a spider. His eyes reflected in the dark like a wild animal as he approached you, concerned thoughts echoing in his mind. With a gloved hand, he reached for you, running his thumb along your chin before placing a finger underneath it, and lifting your face to meet his. His other hand nudged your arms out from their position wrapped around you and he parted your legs so that he could nestle himself in between them, pressed close against you. 

Your fingers trailed over the poof of his collar and down the silk of his chest, wringing your finger around the red ball of fluff near the top. “Remove these,” you demanded. 

Without hesitation, Pennywise’s dirty garments disintegrated, leaving behind a human body. That is, apart from the large appendage raised prominently from his groin. Raking your nails lightly across his skin, you explored his body with curiosity, as if it were the first time you were seeing it. “Let me see you,” he requested, his voice husky with lust. 

Even though you could have easily removed your clothing with a snap of your fingers, you enjoyed the sweet torture of making Pennywise wait while you stripped off your clothing, one piece at a time. 

You particularly enjoyed the way he literally salivated over the thought of you. Drool spilled over his bottom lip as you inserted your fingers under the straps of your bra, playfully running your digits beneath the fabric back and forth, earning an eager growl from your mate. 

Giggling, you relented and pulled them down, unhooking the back and letting it fall to the floor. Just as you went to tease him the same way with your underwear, Pennywise whipped his hand out, sharp talons exposed, and ripped the fabric right from your body. 

Rather than being shocked by the action, it only spurred you on as slickness gathered in your core at his aggressiveness. He opened his jaw to expose his sharp fangs while a long, thick tongue darted out and lapped at your collarbone, working its way down over your chest and across your breasts. He teased your nipples with the surface of his wet, rough muscle, making you groan and reach forward to grip his hair in between your fingers. 

His hands began to trail over your stomach, lower and lower until he reached your thighs. He silently beckoned for you to part your legs with an internal thought, to which you eagerly replied, bending your knees slightly to brace yourself for whatever he was going to do to you. 

While his tongue continued to lick and tug on your breasts, his fingers began to lengthen and lose their stiffness, turning into wriggling tendrils. He shoved his fingers into you, sensing that you enjoyed a little rough play, making you whine as his digits slithered deeper inside of you. 

“You like that,” he commented, smirking at the way his skilled fingers made you come undone. 

“Yes,” you gasped against him, grinding down onto his fingers. “So much. Mnph, keep going - please,” you begged, needing more friction. 

His fingers made a swirling motion, making your knees buckle beneath you. He placed his arm around your waist, holding you up as he worked his tendrils inside of you, exploring every surface, prodding at every nerve that made your body quiver. “Such a needy thing,” he drawled, still working his magic. “Oh, how I’ve missed the noises you make. Tell me, my love… what is it that you crave?” 

Your nails were digging into his shoulders now, drawing blood as they pierced through his flesh. “Y-You,” you cried softly, leaning into him and mouthing at his shoulder while you continued to grind on his digits. “It’s you, I need you.” 

He hummed with satisfaction as he quickened his pace in addition to sending wavelengths of mental pleasure through your internal connection, causing your whole body to tremble with ecstasy. 

It didn’t take long for you to finish, biting down on his collarbone as you climaxed, your cervix throbbing against his tendrils as he continued to move them, coaxing out every last bit of pleasure he could. 

Still, it wasn’t enough. The moment he removed his tendrils and they returned to human-like fingers, you tackled him, knocking the breath out of him as you fell to the hard ground. Kissing a trail down his chest, you felt his curiosity build in his mind. You tried to mentally block your intentions so as to avoid spoiling what you had in store for him. 

He bared his teeth when you finally reached his cock, wrapping one of your hands around it and giving it an experimental squeeze while you inspected what you had to work with. There was a tiny tendril squirming from the slit in the top, aching to find a hole. Along the thick, long shaft were peaked ridges and nubs that moved continuously, vibrating slightly. 

You marveled at the sight, anxious to feel him inside of you as you bent down and licked the tendril, allowing it to coil around your tongue before sinking down onto his girth. His talons ripped through the skin of his fingertips and  tore at the ground as he released a low growl at the unexpected sensation. 

The vibrations of his pulsating dick soothed your throat as you took all of him effortlessly in your mouth. A distant memory of something called a gag reflex crossed your mind, but apparently, you didn’t have one as you easily reached the bulbous end of his shaft, unhinging your jaw and taking his sack into your mouth as well.

Pulling back, your tongue stretched and wrapped around his length, licking while you sucked your way up to his flared head. Swirling your tongue around the head, you continued to pump him in your hands, using a strong grip, which he seemed to enjoy by the way he rutted his hips forward. 

Using your mental connection, you urged him to come so that you could taste more of him. His tongue darted along his bottom lip as he kept his glowing eyes locked on you, trembling as he started to reach his peak, obeying your instructions. 

After only a few more strokes of your tongue, he was emptying himself into your mouth, spurt after spurt leaking down your throat. It was so much that you couldn’t even swallow it all down in time as some dribbled down the corners of your mouth. The sweetness of him was intoxicating, even after it lingered with a bitter aftertaste. 

He braced himself to get up off of the ground, but you placed your hand on his chest and shoved him hard, forcing him back down. You growled at him in warning, indicating that you weren’t yet finished with him. His lips peeled back into a malevolent grin as he relaxed against the ground, propping himself up on his elbows so that he could continue to watch you. 

Crawling on top of him, you rubbed your slick over his throbbing cock, which had quickly sprung back to life with eager anticipation. You shivered at the feeling of his textured cock, anxious to feel it inside of you as the tendril on the top of his slit coiled around your clit, prodding and flicking it in the best way. 

Unable to hold out any longer, you lined yourself up with him and sat down, not needing to prep yourself in any way as your body sucked him up inside of you with fervor. The ridges and bumps nudged you on the inside, creating a delicious friction that you were desperate for. He filled you completely, and yet you weren’t completely satisfied. “More,” you urged, running your nails along his torso. “I need more.” 

His brows creased as you sensed his bewilderment. “More?” he asked, a slight warning in his voice. 

“I want everything,” you confirmed, gyrating your hips slightly, earning another grumble from the back of his throat. “I want all of you.” 

He gripped your thighs harshly as his eyes flashed at you. Immediately, you felt his cock begin to swell inside of you, to the point where it should have torn you in half, but it didn’t. Your body adjusted, shaking as it accommodated all of him, stretching out your entire form. 

Without further hesitation, you started to move, bouncing up and down on his enormous cock, crying out as you were finally filled to the point of satisfaction. Your eyes started to roll into the back of your head as your jaw opened wide, your teeth jutting from your gums. The intensity of the stimulation and pressure from his shaft was overwhelming in the best possible way. 

He started to meet your rhythm with his own thrusts and he snapped his hips forward into you, giving you that extra momentum. Shifting his hips slightly, he pressed into your sweet spot, pounding into it over and over again with each thrust. 

You were relentlessly slamming down onto him now, getting closer to your release with every thrust. Pennywise could sense that you were close, and you could feel that he was, too. His body started to shake as tentacles sprouted from his groin around his monster cock. Dozens of them surrounded the two of you as some lifted you both from the ground, suspending you in the air, while others wrapped themselves around your body, nudging you in all of your most needy areas. One nuzzled itself against your clit while two more each gripped a nipple. There was even one that prodded against your rectum. 

It was all too much as your insides burned with your impending release, bubbling up until it boiled over, throwing you into a spasm of euphoria. You screamed his name as you lost yourself, knowing that he had reached his peak too as he painted your cervix with his thick ropes of come.

Slowly, his tentacles retracted, placing the both of you on the ground once again. As they trailed back into his body, his cock size reduced and he withdrew it from inside of you, allowing your body to roll off and slump on the ground next to him, absolutely spent. Pennywise lifted your limp body and pulled you onto his chest, stroking your hair while his other fingers caressed your arm. 

It continued like that for the next several hours leading into the following evening. The two of you engaged in copious amounts of sex to try and aleviate your restlessness, but it never seemed to be completely satiated. Pennywise had even attempted to take you on a hunt to placate your hunger. He had lured the victim to you rather than having you go out on your own. He seemed reluctant to put you in harm's way, or have you strike the killing blow to your prey. Only when the light faded from their eyes did he allow you to feed. 

A couple of hours after your hunt, you were laying with each other in post-coital bliss, reminiscing in the way the victim had tasted - so delicious after Pennywise had terrorized him with his fear of bees. Your thoughts were interrupted when you were struck by a thought that didn’t come across Pennywise’s mind too often. Unease crept into his mind as he lay next to you, staring off into the darkness, lost in thought. 

“What’s wrong?” you asked, trying to dig deeper into his thoughts, but he blocked you, building a wall that you weren’t able to penetrate. 

“My… friends have arrived,” he nearly spat with disdain. He sat up, materializing his favored silky medieval attire onto his once naked form. “I’m going to give them a proper greeting.” 

Once he got to his feet, you moved to follow him, but he held up his hand to you, baring his teeth in warning. “Stay here. You’re not accompanying me there.” 

Taken aback, you argued immediately. “Why can’t I come with you?” 

Snarling at your response, his claws ripped through his gloves as his fangs glistened in the darkness. “Because I forbid it.” 

He had never spoken to you that way… that you could remember, anyway. Rage was welling up inside of you as you willed your own clothing to appear, ready to follow after him despite his harsh words. “Is that supposed to mean something to me?” you snapped back, surprised at your own boldness. 

In an instant he was directly in front of you, so close that your noses almost touched, his expression livid as he brought his razor-clawed hand up in a motion to grab your throat. However, he suddenly stopped, his lip quivering as he shook, retracting his arm slowly before he had even touched you. 

He took a moment to collect himself before he spoke again, though you could still sense his outrage and how close he was to acting on his aggression. “I am still the superior being,” he hissed through his buck teeth. “You will obey me because everything that I do is in your best interest - and mine. Do you understand me?”

You felt childish as you rolled your eyes, which only irritated him further. “Pennywise,” you addressed him, the pleading tone evident in your voice. “I can’t just sit in this cave for the rest of our lives. I’m going crazy with boredom in here!”

“You’ve been awake merely one day,” he countered with impatience. “You cannot possibly be experiencing discontentment from lack of stimulation.” His eyes trailed up and down your body while flashes of your bodies entangled in one another over the past day rushed through your mind and his. 

“That’s not… I’m not saying that sleeping with you isn’t enjoyable,” you emphasized the last word with a slight huff. “I just need to get out of this environment. I like a good cave as much as the next monster, but even you have to admit that it’s pretty damn bleak down here. I want to explore-” 


Raising your eyebrows, you questioned, “No?” 

Wrinkling his nose and furrowing his brow, he ran his fingers along your hair, brushing it back gently. “If you feel that you’re confined to such a severe degree, we’ll find a way to alleviate your urges in time. For now, you will remain here until it’s safe for you to leave.” 

Saying nothing, you knew that he could sense your frustration and impatience as you turned away from him, shouting profanities at him in your mind, which only seemed to amuse him. When you turned around to continue to argue your point, he was already gone. 

Over the next hour, you found yourself continuously pacing around the cave, stewing in your own anxiousness. After all, what was the worst that would happen if you left to explore on your own? Surely, you were the most powerful creature in Derry - apart from Pennywise. What threats could possibly be lurking around town that could potentially harm you? Also, what was he doing that was so secretive that you couldn’t go with him?

Impatience and curiosity eventually won out as you gave yourself a once-over to confirm that you were somewhat presentable to the human eye before you ventured out of the cave. The moon shone brightly through the trees onto your skin, igniting a sense of contentment that you had been longing for. Inhaling deeply, you could smell the scent of nature carried in the breeze around you. 

Allowing your feet to do the thinking, you just started running. You had no idea where you were headed, but it felt amazing to stretch your legs and to go at full speed through the woods. That was, until you caught a scent that made you stop so fast, you left skid marks in the dirt from your own feet. 

Off in the not too far distance, you smelled human flesh - and not just one human. There were dozens of humans nearby, all of their fears bombarding your head like speakers blasting music so loudly that you couldn’t even comprehend your own thoughts. 

Your knees buckled as your body fought to change shape to appeal to your prey, but since it didn’t know which fear-inspired form to take, your body started ripping itself apart. Screaming in agony, you hit the ground, covering your head in a pointless act to filter the fears of the humans worming their way into your brain to no avail. 

You needed Pennywise. He was the only thing that could put you at ease and prevent you from either acting on your instinct to slaughter them all at once, or allowing yourself to die from the anguish their fears brought you. Why the former mattered to you, you didn’t know, but it did. 

Focusing all of your mental energy, you concentrated on his presence, willing yourself to travel instantly to where he was lurking in town, wherever that might be. The pain in your head lessened as your body morphed through the air, eventually placing you in the front of what appeared to be a dining facility for humans. The illuminated sign on top of the door read Jade of the Orient on the front. 

Before you could slink into the shadows to search for Pennywise, a group of humans burst from the front doors, fear radiating off of them, making your mouth water. You were taken aback when flashes of what they feared most crept into your mind, revealing a familiar figure. They weren’t all separate fears, but in fact, one in the same. It was your mate. 

They stopped in their tracks when they saw you standing by yourself in the middle of the parking lot in front of the restaurant, staring blankly at them. After a moment, their expressions differed from confusion, grief, and absolute shock. 

A man came forward from the group, stopping a few feet in front of you. He was tall and lanky with large glasses and unkempt hair. Something about him struck you as deeply familiar, but you couldn’t conclude how. In fact, they all sparked some form of recognition, deep in your mind where you couldn’t quite reach. 

His eyes were glossed over with the threat of tears as he looked you over, his mouth opening and closing multiple times as if he couldn’t decide on what to say. Finally, one word slipped from his lips. “Y/N?”

The sound of it triggered something in you. Pennywise hadn’t called you by a name since you had awoken. He only used general terms of affection. You hadn’t really thought about what your actual name might be, but the name spoken by the human somehow seemed to fit, filling a part of the hole you had felt in your center since awakening.

“What did you say?” you asked, now unsure if you were imagining it. 

“Y/N,” he repeated, sending another surge within you. “Is that really you?” 

You stepped forward, closing the gap between you, resisting the urge to rip into his jugular as you traced the pads of your fingers along his cheek, over his jaw, and up to the dark strands of his messy hair. Memories started to flood back into your mind like a broken dam, making it seem like your whole world was crashing down. 


Chapter Text


The tall man that stood before you wrapped his arms around your frame, pulling you into a tight embrace. For a moment, you couldn’t move, taken aback by the affectionate action of the human… until your arms instinctively started to hug him back, inhaling deeply into his chest as the familiar smell of him washed over you. 

In an instant, your entire past flooded your mind like a tidal wave. All of your memories as a human had been buried in your brain, scattered in a way that made them nearly impossible to find until now. You remembered everything leading up to your long rest as if it were yesterday. To say that it was jarring to see Richie now almost three decades older was an understatement. 

“Holy shit, Y/N,” Richie mumbled into your hair, releasing a choked sob. “I never thought… I mean… I figured you were dead.” 

He released you then, keeping a firm grip on your shoulders as if he were afraid that he would lose you again if he let go. “Richie,” you uttered, your voice hoarse with the urge to cry. “I can’t believe it. You look…” 

“Handsome as fuck?” he interjected playfully with a wide grin. 

“I was just going to say that you grew into your looks,” you teased, reassuringly rubbing your thumb over his cheek, still not quite sure that this wasn’t all just a dream. 

“What the fuck does that mean?” he asked, eyeing you suspiciously before chuckling and brushing it off. His eyes searched yours for a moment before his grin faded into a grim expression. “You haven’t aged a day.” Typically when people say that, it’s meant as a compliment, but you felt the devastation in his voice as he said it, knowing that it could only mean one thing. You were no longer human.

Releasing his grip, he stepped back from you, his brow furrowing in distress and resentment. The others slowly came forward, wanting to inspect you for themselves. It was then that you realized you knew them, too. 

Eyes welling up, you placed your hand over your mouth in shock as you realized that the majority of the Losers Club was standing before you. They were now much older than you, their features still so similar, and yet so simultaneously different. “Oh my god,” you lamented, trying to contain yourself from having a mental breakdown. 

It’s not that you didn’t know this would happen when you agreed to be Pennywise’s mate, but to expect something and then to actually live it were two very different things. To witness those kids change from adolescents to full-on adults overnight was jarring to say the least. 

Swallowing thickly, you cleared your throat before speaking again. “You… you never left?” you asked, disappointment flooding through you. “You were supposed to leave and live your life away from this place. Why did you stay?” 

“We did leave,” an attractive man remarked from the back of the group. Examining him closely, it took you a moment to finally realize who it was. 

“Jesus Christ… Ben? Are you shitting me?”

His lips curved into a shy, humble grin as he replied, “Yeah, it’s me.” 

“You look so great!” You approached him in an attempt to embrace him, but he immediately flinched, detering you from coming any closer. “I… I’m sorry,” you stammered, stepping back and avoiding his gaze. 

“N-no,” he stumbled over his words, obviously feeling guilty of hurting you. “It’s fine. It’s just… you’re…” 

“A monster,” you finished for him, the taste of the word bitter on your tongue. 

He grimaced at your use of the blunt phrase. “I didn’t mean it like that. I’m sorry.” 

You smiled sadly at him, wanting to give him a reassuring hug, but knowing that it would only make him, and probably everyone else, uncomfortable. It was a relief to see that though Ben had physically changed so dramatically, he was still the same sweet boy you knew. 

Brushing off the rejection, you remembered what Ben had said before you were distracted by his appearance. “Wait, so if you left Derry, why are you back?”

The tension in the air was thick as Mike addressed you. “I was the only one that never left. I’ve been here researching and waiting to see if It would return. After the incident at the bridge, I knew that my suspicions were correct. We made an oath that if It ever came back, we’d find a way to get rid of him for good.” 

Everyone’s eyes were on you as they gauged your reaction, their anxiety heightened as they waited to see how you would respond. After a long pause, you finally replied with a candid, “I see.” Of course they wouldn’t have just let it go. There was no way that you could have expected them to, despite hoping otherwise. “So… you’re here to kill me, too?” 

“No,” Richie stated bluntly, too fast for anyone to interject. 

“Richie, come on,” Bill protested, speaking up for the first time while giving you a sympathetic, and yet equally cold expression. 

“No,” Richie repeated, turning to glare at Bill. “That’s not happening. She’s the only family I have left.”

That struck you as an odd statement. “What are you talking about? Where’s Sara and Aunt Alyssa?” 

Richie turned away, refusing to meet your gaze as you picked up on the apprehensive aura emitting from the others.  “Richie…” you said his name with warning, resisting the urge to growl with impatience. “Where are they?”

He finally locked eyes with you, his expression sorrowful as he took a deep, shaky breath and replied. “Car accident. About 5 years after you… disappeared.” You could tell that he was struggling to find words for what happened to you during your hibernation, but that was the least of your concerns. 

Your family was gone. Two of the people you loved most in the world were dead, and you weren’t there to say goodbye. You couldn’t even remember the last thing that you said to your aunt, but one thing that would forever remain etched in your memory is the grief-stricken expression that Sara gave you as you left with your mate after she had begged you with everything she had to stay. That was the last moment that you will ever have with her. You broke her heart. 

That’s when a thought occurred to you. Pennywise had the capability to control things outside of his slumber. You had remembered this from when he still maintained control over your life even after he had gone into hibernation and you had left for California. Could it be possible that he caused this as a form of his own revenge?

You could feel the heat rising from your chest, up past your throat and into your face. Fury and a deep feeling of betrayal were radiating throughout your body. All reason had been eradicated from your mind as your vision was blinded by rage. You opened your mouth slowly, absentmindedly releasing a shriek that was thunderous, piercing, and downright horrifying. 

Talons ripped through your fingertips as you continued to screech loudly, causing some of the others to cover their ears while the remaining few distanced themselves even further, their eyes wide with astonishment, too frightened to react. 

The moment your scream had ceased, you teleported, leaving the others behind without another word. You concentrated on feeling your way through the airspace, searching for your mate. The moment you caught scent of him, you chased after him, immediately finding yourself deep in the woods on the outskirts of Derry. 

Breathing heavily, the heat from your breath emerged like smoke in front of you, making your appearance even more sinister as you skulked through the trees. “Pennywise!” you shouted, the sound of your own voice sending a chill down your spine. “Show yourself! Right now!” 

“I’m here.” You whipped around to see Pennywise casually leaning against a tree, his arms and legs crossed in a relaxed position while he glared at you in the dark. “You disobeyed me.” 

“Cut the bullshit, Penn,” you demanded. As you approached him, you could feel your fangs drop from your gums in what appeared to be an involuntary reaction. You had briefly recalled this happening to Pennywise whenever he was enraged or lustful. 

“My, my,” he cooed, grinning widely to show off his own sharp teeth gleaming in the moonlight. “We’re in a mood, aren’t we?”

Placing your hands on his shoulders, you pushed him back from his stance against the tree, causing him to stumble back. You snarled furiously at him, which was met with a deep warning growl from him in return. 

“Did you kill Sara and Aunt Alyssa?!”

His expression changed from angry to neutral immediately as he sat up straight, his eyes flickering over your seething form. “No,” he finally answered. “I didn’t.”

“I don’t believe you.” Bitterness was evident in your tone as you started to circle around him like a wild animal cornering their prey. What infuriated you even more was the fact that you could sense what he was feeling, and there was not even a hint of concern. Instead, he seemed amused by your outrage. 

“It’s unfortunate that they’re no longer with us,” he drawled in a bored tone. “Your aunt’s company was tolerable, and Sara… well, she was certainly entertaining.” The malice in his eyes as he spoke of them made something snap inside of you that you couldn’t reign in. 

In an instant you were on him, talons and teeth at the ready as you wrestled him to the ground. Not even a moment later, he had you pinned underneath him, your arms held together above your head by his strong grip while his other hand traced a long nail down the length of your cheek. “Was it something I said?” A malicious cackle followed his taunt, which gave you the opportunity to strike again. 

Lifting your legs, you wrapped them around his chest and twisted yourself upwards while pulling him down with your calves, causing him to fall back while you sprung to your feet, baring your teeth at him. He giggled menacingly, apparently wildly entertained by your attempt to bring him down. 

“Apparently, you’ve regained your memory,” he commented facetiously. 

You narrowed your eyes at him, trying to read his thoughts, but he was blocking you from doing so. “You sound disappointed,” you replied flippantly, matching his uncaring demeanor like it was a game of wits.  

“Oh?” he asked in mock curiosity. “Why would I be?”

“You tell me,” you urged, still circling in an attempt to keep him distracted, meeting him step-for-step as you maintained focus while strategizing your next attack. “Did you purposely try to make me forget? Or were you trying to keep me away from my cousin to make sure that I wouldn’t ever remember where I came from?”

He hummed in response, pursing his lips as he tilted his head in thought and maybe even pity. “I can think of far better ways to spend my time than to plot against my mate.” 

He was an enigma, and he baffled you to the brink of insanity. A part of him was genuinely sincere, but then there was another side to him that was so malevolent, you could never tell if he was capable of anything else. The most frightening aspect was that you could literally see and feel what was in his head, and still he continued to puzzle you.

“Pennywise,” you snarled, losing what little patience you had left. “If you did anything to harm them after our agreement, I swear on my life that I will slaughter you.” 

“Tsk, tsk, tsk,” he scolded, wagging his finger at you in disapproval. “Is that any way to speak to your eternal lover?” He then crouched low to the ground, his eyes glowing a fierce yellow while his own talons emerged from his gloves. His fangs were dripping saliva as he hissed at you, ready to pounce. “Give it your best shot.” 

Following his lead, you also readied yourself for the attack, glowering at him and chomping your teeth in warning as you planted your feet, deciding which was the best angle to go for. 

Just as you were about to make your move, your head felt like it was splitting open. Dropping to your knees, you wrapped your hands around your head as you curled in on yourself, the pain unbearable as the images of numerous fears from the humans echoed through your mind.

The ringing in your ears prevented you from hearing Pennywise calling your name and rushing towards you, laying his hands on your back to gently soothe you with his touch. “It’s okay. I’ve got you,” he urged, trying to mask the trepidation in his voice. “Tune it out. You’ve got to focus on one at a time. Do you understand?” You could barely register what he was saying between the shouts and cries in your mind, some of which were from the humans, and the rest was from your own internal agony. 

It was only a few moments later that you felt yourself being lifted from the ground and transported back to your cave where the pain ceased immediately. Still shaking, you locked your arms around Pennywise’s neck and sobbed into his chest as he sank to the ground, cradling you in between his long limbs. He carded his fingers through your hair, whispering sweet nothings into your ear to calm you as you continued to cry into his chest, shaken by the assault on your mind. 

He remained there, unmoving as you continued to dampen his silky attire with your tears. A few minutes later, you pushed back on his chest softly, distancing yourself from him a bit. You avoided his gaze as he wiped his gloved thumb across your cheek, collecting the fallen tears and drying your face. You felt his lips press against your temple and he remained there for a moment before pulling away with a soft noise. Finally breaking the silence, he spoke. “You will learn how to filter human thoughts. It only seems overwhelming now because they’re all entering your subconscious at once. With time and practice, you’ll do just fine. It will no longer be painful for you.” 

Sighing heavily, you didn’t respond, still caught up in the uncertainty of it all. In a matter of minutes, you went from devastated, to infuriated, to terrified, to relieved. It was all so much. You were worried that when you changed you would be inept without your human emotions, but it seemed as though they were stronger than ever, almost crippling you. 

Sensing your distress, Pennywise spoke again, keeping his tone gentle. “I did not harm your family. I promise you that.” 

Finally looking up at him, you saw the sincerity in his eyes as he looked back at you longingly. “I’m sorry,” you choked out. “I was just so…” 

“Hurt,” he finished for you. “You still feel human emotion deeply.” 

Even if you couldn’t read his thoughts, you could tell by the way he said it that he was disappointed. He was probably hoping that you would become more like him when he appeared cold and indifferent, but you knew better. There was still so much more to him, even if he didn’t want to admit it. You had assumed that was why he acted out in the woods when he saw how upset you were over the loss of your remaining human family. He wanted to be your only family.

Stirring beneath you, he lifted his legs a bit, silently requesting for you to stand as he followed suit. Towering over you, he leaned down to give you a soft kiss before pulling back and nuzzling you with his red nose. “Come,” he urged, taking your hand in his. “We’re going to practice.” 


Chapter Text

 “What the fuck just happened?”

It was just as they had feared. Moments ago, the somewhat average girl that they had remembered from their childhood had changed right before their eyes into something downright terrifying and clearly no longer human. After learning of what became of her family, she shrieked into the air - emitting a sound unlike anything that they had ever heard, shaking them to their core. Within an instant, she vanished, leaving nothing behind but the resounding ringing in their ears from her deafening cry. 

“Seriously… what the fuck just happened,” Eddie repeated, mouth agape in bewilderment. 

“Shut up,” Richie mumbled, refusing to meet anyone else’s gaze, still trying to process the situation. 

“There’s two of them now?” Bill thought out loud, running his hand over his mouth and down his chin anxiously in an attempt to hide his grimace. 

“We knew that this was a possibility,” Mike stated, addressing the group as he paced nervously. He had an odd sense of calm as he spoke, having the reverse effect of putting everyone at ease. “What we didn’t know was whether or not she would have survived. Clearly, we have our answer.” 

Ben scoffed, dazed with disbelief. “Well, yeah. We knew that this might happen, but I never would have thought…” he trailed off, trying to find the right words. “Honestly, I didn’t think that it would even be possible. All this time It could have converted anyone to be like him? Anyone could have become a monster?”

“Shut up,” Richie repeated, going unnoticed by the rest of the group. His posture became visibly rigid as he closed his eyes, turning away from everyone and taking a deep breath to collect his thoughts.. 

“N-no, no, that doesn’t m-make any s-s-sense,” Bill interjected under his breath, the threat of his previous stutter returning due to his anxiety. He had to concentrate to keep his speech regulated. “Remember, he said that she was born with something that m-made her different. A d-darkness.” 

“Is that why he called us back here?” Beverly questioned, her voice shaking. She stood a bit hunched over, as if she were trying to seem smaller than she was, taking a defensive position with one arm wrapped around her stomach and the other draped over her mouth in disbelief. “He wanted us to see what he had done. Is this what he wanted all along?” 

“It seems that It got exactly what it wanted - a mate for life,” Mike confirmed, nodding his head in agreement. “Someone to wreak havoc with him for the rest of eternity.”

“Shut. Up .” Richie emphasized through clenched teeth, still facing away from the group, his hands balling into fists at his sides. 

“Mike, was there anything in the police reports that indicated more than one attacker at the crime scenes? Do they suspect more than one killer?” Bill asked, trying to put the pieces together. 

“No,” Mike replied, rubbing his neck nervously, “But that doesn’t really mean anything. They’ve been awake for days now. I sincerely doubt that she hasn’t eaten anything… or anyone.” 

“Oh fuck,” Eddie cried, struggling to breathe as his hands fumbled around in his pockets searching for his inhaler. “Do you think… Stanley?”

Ben shook his head, not wanting to jump to conclusions. “We don’t even know if anything happened to him. It could just be messing with us.” 

Not waiting to find out, Beverly asked, “Mike, do you still have Stanley’s number?” He nodded, pulling out his phone to locate the number before passing it to Beverly. She dialed the number on her own phone and hit the speaker button  so that everyone could listen in. After a few rings a woman answered and introduced herself as Patricia Uris - Stanley’s wife. “Hi, Patricia. I’m sorry to call so late - I’m an old friend of your husband.” 

Her face fell as the woman on the other line lost her composure, her voice cracking as she fought back her emotion to inform Beverly of his awful demise. “I’m… I’m so sorry,” Beverly replied before she ended the call. As if she couldn’t handle the news, she quickly reached into her pocket with trembling hands for a pack of smokes and a lighter, wasting no time in lighting one and taking a long drag while everyone slowly processed what they just heard.

“Shit! Oh, fuck! They fucking killed him,” Eddie wailed, panicking and going into hysterics.

“Everyone just shut the fuck up!” Richie bellowed, losing his patience as he finally turned to address the group. “You have no idea what you’re fucking talking about! For all we know, he’s holding her captive! Don’t jump to fucking conclusions!” 

Beverly edged closer to him, reaching to place a comforting hand on his shoulder. “Richie…” 

“No!” he snapped, pushing her hand away. “Don’t ‘Richie’ me. Put your god damned pitchforks away and just calm the fuck down.”

“We have to be realistic about this,” Bill insisted, squaring his shoulders. “She’s not the same person you knew - that any of us knew.”

“Technically, she’s not a person at all anymore,” Mike countered offhandedly, unprepared for the resulting shove he got from Richie. 

Before Mike could respond in kind, Bill forced himself in between them, placing his hands on Richie’s shoulders to keep him from taking out any more of his aggression on Mike. “Hey, knock if off,” he demanded, locking eyes with Richie. “We don’t know anything for sure yet. The only thing we do know is that It probably has a plan, and it’s not a good one. We need to talk to your cousin, Richie. Once we know what she knows, we can formulate a plan. Got it?” 

“No way!” Eddie replied in a high-pitched squeak. “You guys can do what you want, but I’m getting the fuck out of Dodge. I don’t need this shit!” 

“We made an oath,” Mike opposed. “It’s our responsibility.”

Eddie scoffed, eyes wide with paranoia and fear. “This is bigger than some oath that we made when we were stupid kids!”

“Alright,” Ben stepped forward assertively. “Let’s just take a breath for a minute. Can we all just agree to at the very least to go back to the B&B and talk this through? I don’t think that the parking lot in front of a Chinese restaurant is the best place to have this kind of discussion.” 

After exchanging hesitant glances, everyone nodded their heads and began making their way back to the Derry Town Home. 

“Get up.” 

The coolness of the cave floor felt good against your flushed cheek as you lay still, not wanting to follow Pennywise’s orders. 

“I said,” your mate indicated coldly, not giving you any form of leniency. “Get. Up.” 

“Fuck. Off.” you grunted, too tired to get into a full-fledged argument. Surprisingly, rather than become enraged at your words, you only felt a flicker of annoyance emitting from the clown. You figured that his tolerance of you must have been improving and that you were actually winning an argument for once. Or, at least that’s what you thought before he yanked you up by your arm and forced you into a standing position. 

“Please, Penn,” you whined breathlessly, not having the energy to snarl at him like you wanted to. “I can’t do this anymore. I need a break.” 

“No. Do it again.” 

“But, I-” 


Training with your mate had been somewhat harrowing. Pennywise had taken it upon himself to kidnap unwilling participants to assist you with your learning. He had captured criminals from Holiday Park, the same place from before, and brought them back to the cave where they reeked of delicious fear. 

Somehow, he had hauled back a group of five unsuspecting men. He had selected such a small group so as not to overwhelm you too much, but it was still difficult to manage. Each time after you had collapsed, Pennywise simply erased their memory and readied them for another round, surprisingly not yet bothering to slaughter them. 

The biggest issue that you had encountered was that the fears of the adults were difficult to conjure. Their fears mostly consisted of things like getting sentenced to life in prison, or missing their parole hearing, or paying taxes. It was almost impossible to emulate those in a physical form, so you had to try and come up with things to compromise. You struggled profusely to dig into the depths of their subconsciousness to find something even remotely tangible to change into, and it proved to be more difficult than you had anticipated. 

Forcing yourself to concentrate, you braced yourself to filter out the thoughts of the small group of men that Pennywise had gathered for your practice. You had gotten better at tuning them out so that you could focus on only one at a time, but with their fears being so obscure, it wasn’t improving as well as you had hoped. 

One of the men had a fear of small spaces, so Pennywise had instructed you to infiltrate their mind and manipulate their thoughts into seeing what wasn’t really there. He said that you could project an entirely different environment to throw them off, and make them think that they were somewhere they weren’t. 

However, it became clear all too quickly that you were already over exerting yourself trying to pinpoint simple fears, and changing someone’s entire surroundings were way out of your league. 

Yet again, you collapsed, the pain too much for you to handle and the frustration settling in. “I give up,” you panted, dramatically sprawled across the floor. “Just leave me here to die.” 

You didn’t have to see Pennywise to know that he was rolling his eyes at you. “You’ll survive,” he stated bluntly. 

“Maybe this is nature's way of telling me that it just wasn’t meant to be,” you thought out loud, refusing to move. “How the hell am I supposed to survive if I can’t even get the basics down? It’s so easy for you, this sucks ass.” 

“You’ve been practising for merely a few days. I have been manipulating minds for an eternity. Do not presume that you’re destined for failure simply because you’re inadequately sifting through multiple human minds so soon after your transition.” 

“You know,” you began with a huff, narrowing your eyes at him. “I think I almost prefer you talking in riddles rather than your proper holier-than-thou way of speaking. I swear, it’s like you’re schizophrenic. I never know which Pennywise I’m going to get on any given day.” 

He emitted his trademark maniacal giggle, clearly amused by your comment. “If riddles and rhymes are what you suggest, I will happily oblige to your request.” 

Immediately regretting your comment, you groaned. “Nope. Nevermind. That’s giving me PTSD. I formally retract my request.” You sat up and glared at Pennywise while he tried to hide his amused grin. “Remind me again why you prefer being a clown? There’s got to be a story there.” 

“No story,” he replied flippantly. “Children are drawn to clowns. It’s an inviting disguise.” 

“Okay, first of all, clowns are creepy as fuck, so your intel is severely outdated.” He smirked, humming lightly to acknowledge his indifference to your response. “Secondly, can’t you take a break from being the clown? I’m not repelled by it or anything, it’s just…” 

“You prefer my human form.” 

You should have known that he already knew what you desired. The fact that he could read you even more easily than before was going to take some getting used to. The ability to keep any sort of secret from him was a thing of the past, and even then it didn’t quite work out as well as you would have liked.

“Technically,” he began, taking a long, smooth stride towards you. “My clown form is human. Mostly. Does that not appeal to you?”

“I never said it didn’t,” you countered, feeling small under his heated gaze. He wasn’t angry, but there was something there - an intensity that was growing with each word spoken between the two of you. “I think you’re attractive regardless. I just… I don’t know - it’s just weird. It’s like I have a clown kink or something.” 

“Do you?” he asked, his voice changing from his eerie, raspy clown tone to a voice like silk. He had a wicked gleam in his eye as he stepped closer to you, like a predator cornering his prey. 

The heat was more prominent now. It was clear that what you were feeling wasn’t anger or nervousness. It was lust, and it was building steadily, especially with the way that he was looking at you. 

“Umm… I-don’t think… maybe? You make me question everything about myself, so honestly, who the hell knows.”

He chuckled, his clown appearance slowly melting away, revealing the handsome form of a man with chestnut brown hair, and inviting eyes. He pursed his pillowed lips ever so slightly, the corners lifting at the end to reveal an infuriatingly confident grin. He stood casually, placing his hands in his pockets as he was now adorned with black slacks and a form-fitting white collared shirt, which suited him very well. 

“Better?” he asked, cocking an eyebrow and tilting his head in a facetiously innocent manner. 

Two could play at that game. Biting your lip, you sashayed over to him, tracing a nail up his chest and letting it linger on the top button of his shirt. Tilting your head back to accommodate the height difference, you lifted your hands to pull his face towards you, so close that your lips lightly brushed against his as you spoke. “It’s adequate.” 

Releasing his face, you turned to walk away from him, knowing that you wouldn’t get very far. He gripped your arm and yanked you back to him, crashing his mouth against yours in an urgent, needy kiss. Tongues fighting for dominance, you breathed in his scent deeply, relishing in his taste. 

Just as you were about to rid yourself of your clothes, he pulled back, a frustrated expression on his face. He completely separated himself from you, flexing his fingers as he concentrated on keeping his composure. 

“What’s wrong?” you asked, not able to interpret what it was that he was feeling. It was an odd mix of emotions that you hadn’t sensed before and couldn’t describe. 

“It’s too soon,” he answered, wiping access spit from his bottom lip with his thumb as he faced you. “I need to… refrain for now. It’s not time yet.” 

You scoffed, irritated by his unnecessary restraint. “Seriously? We can’t take an hour to mess around? You’re really that insistent on training?” 

A wry grin graced his lips, indicating that you completely misinterpreted his intentions. To spare you any further confusion, Pennywise repeated a word in his mind until you were able to make it out clearly. 


The realization hit you like a freight train. He was waiting for you to go into heat so that he could breed you. You remembered him mentioning something about it briefly before your long rest, but you thought that you had made yourself clear when you told him that wasn’t something that you were in any hurry to accommodate. 

“Pennywise,” you groaned, not at all keen on the idea of delaying sex, and especially not the idea conceiving a monster. “I told you. I’m not… I don’t think that I’m ready for that. Why are you in such a rush? Aren’t we eternal? Is it really important for you to try and have a kid so soon?” 

“You misunderstand,” he countered, edging closer to you, that wicked gleam returning to his eyes. “Your heat isn’t simply about breeding. It’s about much, much more.” 

Before you realized what was happening, he had you pressed against the wall of the cave, his large hands placed on both sides of your head as he entrapped you with his long arms, gazing down at you with a hungry gaze. His eyes glowed fiercely as he continued, “When the time comes, you will be begging for me to indulge you.” He leaned in impossibly closer, whispering into your ear, earning a pool of wetness that was dripping from your core. “You’ll be overwhelmed with an ache that only I will be able to alleviate. Your entire body will shut down, your need for me almost unbearable until I fill you to capacity with my cock. I’m going to fuck you with abandon - so brutally that you’ll lose consciousness in the pleasure that only I can bring you. You’ll feel like you’re dying in the euphoria, and the only remedy will be my seed, lining your inner walls and bringing you back from the brink of death. Do you understand?” 

Your entire body was trembling. He had never spoken to you that way with such crude and enticing detail. The ability to speak was long gone as you exhaled, releasing a breath that you didn’t realize that you were holding. The wetness of your core had soaked your panties as he had described what he had planned for your heat, and suddenly… you were eager for it. 

Just as you leaned in to close the gap between you, he pulled away, clapping his hands together and straightening his posture. “Enough of this. It’s a discussion for a later time. Let’s resume your training.” 

“Ugh!” you groaned loudly, trying to supress the throbbing in your lower region, knowing that Pennywise was too determined to be swayed at that moment. As he turned to gather the group of criminals once more, you called after him. “Pennywise, I can’t keep at it like this. There has to be another way.”

He looked thoughtful for a moment before replying. “There is.” 

“Thank fuck,” you huffed. “Whatever it is, let’s do it. It beats torturing myself over these creeps. What do you suggest?”

Pennywise’s grin faded as he narrowed his eyes at you, gauging your reaction before letting one word slip from his lips. “Children.” 

Just the word made a chill crawl up your spine. The thought of tormenting and harming an innocent being was too much, and you couldn’t allow yourself to do it. 

“No, Penn. We’ve been over this. I can’t…” you trailed off, shivering at the very thought of it. 

He approached you, placing a finger under your chin to lift your face slightly and lock eyes with you. “Do you still doubt me? Silly girl, it’s possible to hunt and not to feast on your prey. We have to keep ourselves entertained, even when we’re full. I believe the term humans use is, ‘catch and release’?” 

That oddly made sense to you. If you could keep your instincts in check, it would probably be easier for you to hunt children. Pennywise had explained to you previously that they were easier to hunt because their fears were simplified. 

Mulling over the possibility in your mind, you asked, “You promise not to hurt them? It’s just practice?”

He took your hand in his and brought it up to his lips with your palm facing upward to reveal your scar. He slowly licked across the marked skin, his eyes never leaving yours, causing a stir in your core at the intimacy of his action. You had assumed that his act was similar to that of a person kissing the back of someone’s hand. He grinned unnaturally widely in a wicked way before replying, “I guess we’ll have to try it and see. Won’t we?”

Chapter Text


The delectable scent of human flesh was potent in the air once Pennywise teleported the two of you out of the cave and into a dark corridor surrounded by metal frames. You were a bit thrown off by the roaring cheers of a large crowd close to you since you weren’t able to physically see them. The thoughts and fears of the nearby people quickly invaded your mind, causing you to falter a bit, but once you focused all of your energy, you were able to force them down for the time being. Though the action left you with a splitting headache, you were grateful for the progress you had made in such a short amount of time. Pennywise granted you an approving grin as he noticed your acclimation. 

Turning your attention to your surroundings, you attempted to decipher your whereabouts. Despite your ability to see perfectly in the dark, you were still clueless as to where Pennywise had brought you. “Where are we?” 

He nodded his head towards the direction of the boisterous crowd, indicating that you should see for yourself. Rounding the corner of the corridor, you saw streaks of light through the metal frames. After edging closer and looking through the open slots in the frames, you realized that you were standing under bleachers filled with humans who were watching a local sporting event. 

Turning back to Pennywise, you gave him a skeptical glare. “How is this supposed to help me?”

“Relax,” he insisted. “You have to know how to separate the fears in your mind and control your abilities. I will show you how it is done. Children are the best example.” 

“We’re at a high school football game,” you pointed out cynically. “High schoolers aren’t exactly what I would refer to as children.” 

“They aren’t the targets,” he corrected, giving you a scrutinizing look. “In time, you will learn how to feel the energy of not only the residents of Derry, but the town as a whole. I am connected to everything and everyone. I can sense who the best targets are, and where they are located at all times. There’s a perfect victim here.” 

It irked you when he spoke as if he knew all the answers to questions you hadn't even thought to ask yet. Though he was clearly trying to educate you, it made you feel small. Reluctantly, you inquired further. “You were lured here by a child? I can’t imagine there’s any kid who would send out signals wanting to be frightened to death and then eaten.” 

He gave you a wry smile with what you could swear was mixed with a look of pity before he replied. “It’s not that kind of attraction. I can sense who are the easiest targets because of their weaknesses. I choose my victims based on how likely they are to fall for my advances. I brought us here because there is a child here who is easily swayed.”

“Okay, that makes sense, but the point is to practice, right? We’re not here to kill anyone. This is just an exercise to filter thoughts and fears so I’m not overwhelmed. Isn’t that why we’re here?” Your eyes narrowed at him as you waited for an answer. 

Pursing his lips, he paused for a moment before responding as his eyes danced with amusement. “Of course.”

Something was off about all of this. The way he carried himself with ease through what should have been a tense moment unnerved you, but you had figured that it was due to your reluctance to put yourself in this situation in the first place. Pennywise was the only one who had experience with this, and you weren’t going to learn any other way than by exposing yourself to this stuff little by little.

“So, what’s the first step?”

Grinning wickedly, he licked his lips before proceeding. “We’re going to try a different approach this time.” 

That did nothing to ease your nervousness. “In what way?”

“Not every hunt requires changing your shape. You have the ability to lure your prey without fear. All it takes is to pinpoint their weaknesses.” His eyes flared yellow while simultaneously red lines began etching into his face to reveal his clown form. “This appearance lets me lure children without having to change into their specific internal fear.”

“Penn… don’t you think that you’re going to look a little out of place as a clown here? How the hell do you expect to lure anyone like that?” 

His lips twisted into a smirk once again before he winked at you and said, “Blend with the shadows and remain silent. Take note of my actions.”

Resisting the urge to roll your eyes, you crept into the darkness, masking your flesh to reflect your surroundings and remain a safe distance away. Once you were situated, Pennywise flashed his teeth at you in an excited grin before lifting a closed fist in front of his lips. With the both of you focused on his fist, he opened it slowly to reveal a beautiful, glowing firefly. He blew into the palm of his hand, releasing it into the air as it fluttered above his head, lingering for a moment before disappearing around the corner. 

You gave him a questioning glance, not yet understanding what his endgame was. It wasn’t until you saw the glow of the firefly return down into the bleachers with a little girl trailing behind it. She couldn’t have been more than eight, her curiosity guiding her as she extended her arms gently in an attempt to catch the erratically flying bug. If you were being honest with yourself, it was an ingenious move on Pennywise’s part. 

Watching carefully, you held your breath as the little girl came closer. Her thoughts started to creep into your mind at that point, along with other information about who she was. Her name was Victoria, but her friends called her Vicky. She had self-esteem issues due to the prominent birthmark on her cheek, often making her a prime target for bullies. You faltered for a moment, your head swimming with information that hit you so quickly. It was as if you were downloading her entire life’s story into your own mind within a fraction of a second. The sensation of it was so odd, and something beyond the comprehension of your previously human brain. 

Snapping out of your daze, you had been quickly pulled back into the present when Pennywise clapped his hands around the firefly, bringing it towards him before cracking his hands open to reveal the glow, casting a soft light on his clown face. “Hello, Vicky,” he cooed, drool spilling down his lips and one of his eyes drifting to the side. “Isn’t that what your friends call you? Vicky? How did I know that? I guess I must be your friend too!” He finished with a sinister chuckle. 

Despite the unease you felt regarding his approach, you continued to watch in silence, gauging the girl’s reaction. Suspicion and fear were her initial emotions, and she was having none of his bullshit. “If you’re my friend, why are you hiding in the dark?” Pennywise met her narrowed eyes with a grimace, reluctant to respond. “You’re not my friend. You’re scary.” 

She turned to walk away, back to her family when Pennywise started to release pathetic whimpers, indicating that he was crying. You had to hold your tongue to keep from laughing at his attempt to keep her there. However, much to your surprise, it started to work. Turning back to him, her fear turned to remorse as she addressed him once more. “Why are you crying?”

Sniffling, Pennywise pouted his lip before replying with a quivering voice. “People always make fun because of the way I look. I thought if you couldn’t see my face… maybe you’d want to be my friend.” 

The affect his words had on her were instantaneous. He was tugging at her heartstrings by using her own insecurities against her. It was manipulatively brilliant. You struggled to determine if you were more disgusted or impressed by his actions. 

“Oh, never mind,” he continued, shying away from her. “Silly old Pennywise. You’ll never have any friends.”

Vicky stepped forward, her empathy coming out in waves. Hesitantly, she replied, “People make fun of me, too...“ 

“They do?” Pennywise asked, immediately ceasing his crocodile tears.

Nodding her head, she pointed to the birthmark on her cheek. “Because of this.” 

Grinning wickedly, Pennywise replied, “Well, isn’t that silly? That little thing? I can blow that thing right away!”

Her eyes lit up, a faint smile gracing her lips as she beamed at him. “You could?”

“Oh, yes! One poof and it’d be gone!” Pennywise assured her between fits of giggles. “But… you would have to get close enough to see my face. I don’t know, Vicky…” 

“It’s okay!” she insisted. “I won’t make fun, I promise!” 

“Promise, promise?” Pennywise asked, drool spilling over his lips.

As time went on, the less impressed you were with his technique, and the more suspicious you became. When you tried to infiltrate his thoughts, he put up a wall, blocking you from reading him as clearly as you wanted to, but you were still able to pick up on a bit here and there. Very briefly, you sensed a deep thrill, followed by an immensely strong sense of hunger. 

Vicky nodded excitedly, eager to see what her strange new friend could do. “Well, okey dokey!” he agreed cheerfully. “Just come on in a little closer, and we’ll blow it away on the count of three!”

No. He wouldn’t dare. No, no, no, this couldn’t be what you were thinking. He told you that he wouldn’t kill anyone, and he knew how you felt about eating children. He wasn’t even scaring her - there would be no point in killing her unless she was afraid. Why was he acting like this?

Vicky was right in front of him now, turning her marred cheek towards him in anticipation. He remained where he was, his drool pooling at her feet as their interaction progressed. Listening intently, you heard him starting to count. “One… two…” 

You didn’t like the sound of that. What did he have planned when he got to three? Why was he taking so long to get to three? No, this wasn’t right. It was time to intervene. 

Emerging from the shadows, you sensed Vicky’s unease after Pennywise stopped counting. Faintly, you heard her mumble, “You’re supposed to say thre-” 


You choked on your own breath as you stopped dead in your tracks at the sight of Pennywise lunging forward and tearing into the face of the sweet little girl with his teeth before ripping it clean off.

Ignoring the delicious scent of blood that filled the air, you didn’t even hesitate when you tackled him, ripping him away from the already lifeless child. He snarled at you as he tried to get back on his feet, but you remained on top of him, baring your teeth. “Pennywise! What the fuck do you think you’re doing!” 

“Remove yourself,” he warned, his eyes flashing dangerously at you. 

“This wasn’t the plan!” you continued, ignoring his demand. “You knew how I felt about hurting a child! You fucking knew! Why would you do that?!”

Distracted by your rage, you weren’t prepared for him to move so quickly as he grabbed your arms and flipped you over so that he was straddling you, holding your hands in place over your chest as he leaned in close to speak. “They are food . They are a source of nourishment and entertainment - nothing more. Their lives are meaningless. Young or old, they are all the same, and you would do well to understand that sooner rather than later.” 

“Fuck you,” you snapped back, betrayal welling up inside of you. Acting on instinct, you surged forward and sunk your teeth into his forearm.

He hissed at the assault and jumped off of you, bringing his hands down to grab at the collar of your shirt before ripping you up from your position on the ground. You didn’t even get a chance to react before he had gripped you harshly around your throat, lifting you into the air effortlessly as you clawed at his hands trying to break free. “I grow tired of this,” he drawled in a bored tone. “You need to accept who you are. Stop trying to fight it.”

The cold and calculated gaze in his eyes frightened you, bringing back memories of when you were a fragile human and was terrified just being in his presence. You hadn’t felt that way in a long time, but the intensity of it was just as strong as it had been in your other (previous) life. You were frustrated with yourself for playing along with Pennywise’s sick and twisted game. It felt like history was repeating itself, reverting back to where you started and eliminating any progress the two of you had made.

“Hey! What is going on back here?” 

A stranger’s voice pulled both of your focus onto three teenage boys who were peering behind the bleachers from the end of the row. They just happened to be passing by when they saw Pennywise’s aggressive hold on you. 

The moment they had been detected, Pennywise had shifted into his human self. You had no idea whether or not they saw his clown form. Even if they had, he had changed so quickly, they probably would have thought that they had imagined it. “Let go of her!” 

Pennywise dropped you roughly, curling his lip at the intruders. As they approached the two of you, one of the boys asked, “Ma’am, are you okay? Do you need help?”

How naive. As if these boys were any match for the Eater of Worlds. Maintaining your appearance as the damsel in distress, you gripped your throat, rubbing it tenderly. “I’m fine, thank you. We’re just having a heated discussion.” 

They may have been young, but they weren’t stupid, and they sure as hell weren’t falling for your act. They exchanged glances with one another before one of the boys extended his hand to you. “I think it would be best if you came with us.” 

Despite their persistence, you could sense that they had no malicious intent and you knew that they were trying to be kind, but your patience was wearing thin. Heat spread throughout you at the thought of Pennywise slaughtering a child despite your request, making you involuntarily shake, as your face flushed with anger. You clenched your fists so hard that your nails cut into your palms. There was also the concern that the longer they stayed, the more likely it was that they would notice the body of a child hiding (lying) in the shadows. “No, really. I’m okay. Please, leave us be.” 

“Ma’am, I don’t think that you-” 

You had snapped. No longer able to govern your violent emotions, you instantly grew five times larger while your fangs jutted from your gums and your eyes popped out of your head as you released an angry screech in their direction. The boys scrambled backwards, one of them tripping onto the gravel, cutting his palms on the jagged rocks. Another bolted away while cursing without a glance behind him and you could have sworn that the last guy pissed himself before they all followed suit and ran away from the scene. 

Pulling yourself back into your human form, you took a moment to brush the dirt off of your clothes, intentionally ignoring Pennywise’s smirk and his internal praise pouring into your mind. Out of the corner of your eye, you had noticed his body tremble before a shimmer surrounded the two of you, fading away as soon as you had noticed it. It took you a moment realize that it was a veil of camouflage. Pennywise was hiding the two of you from the humans to avoid any further interruptions. Crafty bastard.

Turning to face him, your jaw clenched in a poorly suppressed rage as you addressed him. “Why are you doing this? It’s possible to survive without killing innocent people. Why would you lie right to my face”

His eyes flickered over your form as he prepared to answer you with another question. “Tell me, why are you so determined to hold onto your humanity? Are you truly that disgusted by what we are?” 

You disgust me.” 

Pennywise clenched his jaw as your words cut through him, leaving their mark. Though you could sense his hurt for the briefest moment, the pain was quickly replaced with indifference and a mocking smirk, suddenly making you feel like the prey to his predator.

“My sweet, empathetic mate.” He used the term as a degrading insult and the tone of his voice was taunting with an edge of contempt. “Your remaining humanity is crippling the potential of what you could be.”

“My humanity isn’t the issue, you arrogant ass!” You were so livid, that every word you spoke was heavy with betrayal and rage, so potent that it was actually causing a strain in your voice. “It’s you and your fucking head games! I thought that we were done with all of this bullshit, but time and time again you prove that I can’t trust you. Honestly, Penn, I don’t know how much more of this I can take. I fucking died for you, isn’t that enough?”

His cold and calculated stare cut right through you, making your blood crawl beneath your skin as he stepped impossibly closer to you so that you could feel the chill of his breath on your face. “Let me be as clear as possible,” he sneered, his lips twisting into a grin while his eyes flashed dangerously at you. “You are my lover, but you do not have control over me. I am your creator. Therefore, you are bound to me - both mentally and physically. I have heeded your requests for mercy up until now because I care for you,” he spat as if the words left a bitter taste on his tongue. “Do not let my affection fool you. I have spent an eternity alone, and I will not hesitate to end you if you do not come to terms with our way of life.”  

His words rang through your skull on repeat as you let them sink in. He had to be bluffing, right? After all that he had done to convince you to be his mate, he wouldn’t just kill you because of your reluctance to eat kids… would he? Could he? You didn’t even know the depth of your capabilities yet. For all you knew, you could be even more powerful than him, though it was highly unlikely. 

It was infuriating how he could frustrate you beyond all measure. He knew exactly how to get under your skin - continuously pushing until you were utterly enraged with him. The need to express your anger was still prominent, forcing you to ignore his warning rather than to heed it. “You’re so fucking weak.” His eyes flashed brightly in the dark at your harsh words, but you continued anyway. “You’d rather be stubborn and force me to do something that you know I never wanted than to compromise a little bit and god forbid both of us be happy.” 

A capricious thrill of satisfaction filled you as you felt his reaction to your words. You had managed to get under his skin, and he was trying like hell not to show it. Either that, or he was using all of his self-control to keep from slaughtering you where you stood. Maybe a bit of both. 

Pennywise remained silent, his face like stone as his eyes bore into you, searching - for what you didn’t know. The back-and-forth exchange of insults and threats seemed to be ingrained in the very foundation of your relationship since the two of you had met, and now you were both back to your old ways.

A shiver ran down your spine as something changed in him at that moment. His eyes glazed over as his aurora altered around him into one that you hadn’t yet felt. It was primal, vicious and equally terrifying. He started to laugh maniacally, which caught you off guard considering he was still in his human form, making the laugh even more chilling. “It’s clear now. Oh, yes - very clear. Your little friends are dragging you up, up, up! No, no, that will not do. Not for Pennywise. You’re meant to sink with me while the others float, and float they will!”

You gawked at him, unsure as to why he was speaking like the clown when he hadn’t spoken that way in a long time. He typically reserved that way of speaking for when he was taunting his prey… unless that’s what you were to him now. 

“Penn… what are you doing?” 

He was on you in a flash, wrapping one arm around your waist to pull you against him, while he placed his long, bony finger against your lips to prevent you from talking. “Hush, hush, hush. Wouldn’t want to break ol’ Mr. Gray’s concentration now, would ya? No, no, no! Worry not, my beloved anchor. I’ll take care of the problem.”

Who the fuck was Mr. Gray? What did he have to do with anything? You attempted to protest, knowing that whatever he had in mind was not going to end well, but he pressed the rest of his hand over your mouth, silencing you. Instead, you shouted at him in your head, knowing that he could hear you. He had completely shut you out, which was something you hadn’t yet learned how to do, and it angered you when he did it so you couldn’t read him in return.

His eyes blazed back at you as his human mouth morphed into a sick and twisted grin, showing off his pointed teeth. “I think it’s time that your friends played with the clown!”

Chapter Text


“Eduardo! Andale, let’s go!” 

Richie was calling for Eddie to come downstairs to meet with the rest of the Losers who had gathered in the parlor of the empty inn. It was time to talk about their options. Not long after, Eddie trudged down the stairs holding two giant suitcases. “I just gotta grab my toiletry bag and then I’m all set.” He stopped short at the sight of everyone eyeing him with confusion. “What?” he asked.

“Eddie, we agreed to talk this through first,” Beverly answered, tilting her head with a sympathetic gaze.

“We can’t just run from this,” Mike chastised, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Well, what the fuck,” Eddie groaned with a sigh, dropping his heavy suitcases with a loud thud on the stairs. “What’s there to talk about? We’re in the same place as an evil, murdering clown and his monster bride. The only logical thing to do would be to run, are you crazy?”

Bill looked tired, resting his head in his hands while he sat on a decorative floral automan in the corner of the room. “Even if we could run, there’s n-no point,” he murmured. “Look at what happened to S-Stanley. It was able to make us forget, r-r-regardless of w-where we were. It’s like we’ve been… inf-fected by him.”

Concern echoed across their faces as they tried to comprehend what Bill was getting at. “Infected us, how? Ben asked, leaning against the bar in the back of the parlor and crossing his arms. 

“The first time we ever came in contact with him. Together… in that house,” Mike interjected. “We got away, but we never truly escaped. We’re connected to him, and It has the power to destroy us from wherever It is, and wherever we are.”

“Well, what about Y/N?” Eddie pressed. “She doesn’t want us dead, right? At least, it didn’t seem that way back at the restaurant. Can’t she help?” 

“We can’t count on her,” Mike answered, ignoring the heated glare he received from Richie. “We don’t know how much control It has over her. For all we know, she could be doing his bidding.” 

“Bullshit,” Richie snapped, annoyance fracturing his attempt at indifference. “She’s not a fucking puppet. You saw how upset she got when she found out about our family.” 

“Exactly,” Mike countered. “She’s unpredictable, and we have no idea where her loyalties lie.”

Beverly stood up and placed a hand on Richie’s shoulder. “I know you love her, Richie, but we have to be careful. We have no idea what she’s been through or how dangerous she is.” 

Ben sighed heavily, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. “Okay, so we’re on our own. How can we defeat this thing?” 

“The Ritual of Chud,” Mike answered in a matter-of-fact tone.

“The ritual of chew?” Richie asked, skeptically. “ What the fuck is that?”

“Ritual of Chud ,” Mike emphasized, his stern gaze meeting Richie’s confused one. “It’s the only way to kill It for good.”

“That’s not possible.”

Everyone’s heads whipped around to the sound of your voice coming from the doorway. Bill leapt to his feet and scrambled back while everyone took several steps away to bring as much distance between you and them as they could.

Richie was the only one to dare come close to you as he eyed you sadly. “Y/N?”

 “Jesus Christ,” Eddie murmured, pressing himself up against the wall furthest from you. “Richie, don’t.” 

As much as you wanted to reach out and hug Richie, you couldn’t help but focus all of your attention on trying to muffle their fears that were projecting loudly and obnoxiously in your mind. Images of you tearing into their throats or slashing their insides to ribbons with your talons flashed across your vision as you read their thoughts, making you wince at the ruthlessness of it all. 

Lifting your hands to rub your temples, you mumbled, “Can you all just… not think so loudly, please? I’m not here to hurt you.” 

Your words did nothing to ease the tension as their fears changed to a scenario in which you had earned their trust until you attacked them from behind, along with several other horrific schemes. “Seriously?” you seethed, feeling your eyes literally flash at them with a fiery glow. Of course, that did nothing to ease the anxiety of the group as they eyed you with terror, not knowing how to react to your presence. 

Since they were obviously not going to calm down any time soon, you decided to put your practice to use and filter out their thoughts, pushing them out of your subconscious so that you weren’t assaulted by their constant horror stream. Taking a deep breath, you cleared your mind and were alone with your thoughts once more. You seemed to finally be getting the hang of it, which was an enormous relief. It wasn’t perfect, but it was a start. 

“Richie, what is she doing here?” Ben asked, nodding in your direction while staring daggers at Richie. 

He scoffed in response. “How the fuck should I know? I didn’t call her!”

“Nobody called me here,” you replied, absentmindedly taking a step further into the room, causing the others to stir uncomfortably. “I’m here to make sure that none of you get hurt.” 

“It’s a little late for that,” Richie muttered, his voice laced with resentment. “The fucking clown killed Stanley.”

Taken aback, you hesitated. “...what?”

“Stanley’s dead,” he replied bluntly, his expression livid. “If we don’t do something about it, the rest of us are gonna die, too.” 

Your stomach dropped, a feeling of nausea fell over you as you swallowed down the lump in your throat. “How did he die?” 

“It doesn’t matter how,” Richie argued, raising his voice. “It fucking happened! Thanks to that murderous fuck that you sold your soul to!” 

He was fuming, clearly hurting and projecting his rage onto you. Though you weren’t sure of the details, you knew that it was entirely possible for Pennywise to have had a hand in Stanley’s death - as much as you didn’t want to admit it.

“W-what did you mean when you said that it’s n-not possible?” Bill stuttered in a hushed tone, afraid that if he was too abrasive that you would snap. You could sense the shiver that ran down his spine when your eyes darted to his, taking him in as he addressed you. “You’re s-saying he can’t be k-killed?”

Glad for the change in subject, you shook your head. “Not that I know of. He’s made a number of comments about how he’s immortal and eternal. He’s never let on that he could be killed. The guy is supposedly millions of years old and he doesn’t really consider anything or anyone to be much of a threat.” 

“Or you might just be telling us that to protect him,” Eddie accused suspiciously.

You flashed him a smirk, earning a terrified look from the anxious man. “I might be,” you purred, not able to resist messing with him a bit. 

“Quit bullshitting us,” Richie demanded, seeing right through your facade. “Why are you really here?” 

“I told you. I want to make sure that you guys are okay. Pennywise…” you halted, not sure how much you wanted to divulge to the Losers. You decided it was best to be honest, but to spare them the details. “He thinks that my attachment to you is crippling my… abilities. He’s not thrilled about it. Ultimately, he wants to cut all of my ties to humanity.”

“Meaning… us?” Beverly questioned, reaching for her pack of cigarettes with trembling hands. 

You nodded in agreement, feeling the tension rise in the room, which you hadn’t thought was possible considering how on edge everyone was already. 

They exchanged glances with one another, trying to read each other’s expressions without giving too much away. Finally, Bill spoke. “W-why are you h-helping us?”

It was a loaded question. Why were you helping them? They weren’t your kind anymore. You had maybe a year left with them before you would return to your rest, and by the time you woke up, they would probably have passed of old age, or were too old to remember you. Pennywise was your present, as well as your future. He was your everything - your eternal mate, and yet, you couldn’t allow him to slaughter your loved ones. It was possible to play both sides - wasn’t it? You could protect both the humans of your past, and your mate of the present from each other. It would be tricky, but it was something that you had to try. 

You turned to Richie, emotion clawing up through your throat and into your face, causing your eyes to glisten with unshed tears. “Because… I love you.” 

It was hard to argue the sincerity in your voice, and you knew it. Richie could no longer keep a safe distance as he was overwhelmed with the need to hold you. Finally approaching you, he wrapped his giant arms around you, pulling you into a tight embrace that you had longed for. You inhaled deeply into his chest, savoring the familiar scent that was always Richie, along with new smells that indicated your once pre-pubescent Richie was now a full-fledged adult, and he smelled… delicious. 

Upon that realization, you forced yourself back from him, keeping your face neutral to hide your alarm at the fact that for the briefest moment, you wanted to sink your teeth into his skin and feel the blood run down your throat. That might become a problem in the future, but for now, you seemed to have a handle on it, so you shoved that concern to the back of your mind. So long as you could maintain your self-control, you’d be fine. Or… at least that’s what you had to tell yourself. 

“So, you’re just going to be our bodyguard or something?” Eddie asked, wringing his hands nervously. 

Shrugging your shoulders, you replied, “I guess so. I’m kind of just figuring things out as I go along. I just know that you’re his target and he’s not exactly one who doesn’t hold a grudge. Considering the way you guys went after him 27 years ago, I’m sure he’s seeking some form of revenge in addition to trying to sever our ties to one another.”

“But… you understand that you being here won’t keep us from going through with our plan?” Mike pressed, raising his eyebrows at you. 

“What plan?”

“You see,” he continued, gaining momentum as he raised a finger into the air eccentrically. “He doesn’t know that I know.”

“Know what?” Ben questioned.

“How to kill the shit out of It!” Mike snapped, suddenly in a frantic demeanor. “Look… we don’t have a lot of time. It would be better if I showed you. Come with me.”

Much to your surprise, no one bothered to argue as you all trailed behind Mike out of the Inn. You felt the unease of everyone as you walked with them through town as the sun started to rise over the horizon. Though they tried to be subtle, you didn’t miss the little things like the way Richie opened his mouth to say something to you, only to falter and turn away, leaving his thoughts unspoken. It was also obvious the way Ben walked closer to Beverly, positioning himself between the two of you to protect her from whatever you were capable of, should you suddenly lose control. 

Choosing to ignore their hesitance around you, you closed your eyes, instead trying to get a feel for whether or not Pennywise was lurking nearby. You didn’t exactly sense his presence, but you certainly felt his eyes on you. It was obvious that he was watching you and the Losers carefully, knowing exactly what you were doing at every moment. So long as he stayed away from them, you were fine. That is, until your hunger could no longer go ignored and you had to leave them to feed. There was also the fact that Pennywise was somewhere out there seething with rage at the knowledge of you protecting the Losers from him. It was probably going to be a nasty reunion once you were alone with him again, but so long as the others were alive, that was something you would willingly endure. 

Eventually, Mike led you all into the woods. It was then that a few of the Losers started to remember the area. They had referenced it as the “clubhouse”. The entrance had been buried under dirt, leaves and sticks after not having been in use for so long, so they scattered trying to find the entrance. Ben seemed to have a good feel for where it might be, so he gave the ground a hard jab with his foot, which may not have been the best idea, since that had caused the door to cave in and he fell through with a loud thud. 

“I’m okay!” You all heard him call out from the ground underneath. “Come on down!” 

The others exchanged nervous glances with one another, wondering if they should willingly let you to go down into the bunker first, or last, or even at all. After a moment of internal debate, they shuffled around, evidently deciding that it was safe to allow you entry. One-by-one you all shuffled down the decaying stairs into the underground layer that the others knew so well. You had to admit that you were impressed by the craftsmanship that went into it, especially considering it was built by a pre-teen. Come to find out, Ben was actually a very successful architect, which made a lot of sense considering how much work he had put into the clubhouse. 

The Losers started to sift around their old belongings, reminiscing in their fond memories of childhood - ones that didn’t involve a murderous monster hunting them down. You had enjoyed listening to their stories, particularly the ones that involved Stanley and how he had always been a gentle old soul who was wise beyond his years.

Being in that clubhouse was like being in a safe haven for them. You no longer felt the unease and tension of your differences as you sat and listened to them speak. It was like you were one of them again, and the feeling made your heart swell. You would miss this… hell, you already missed it, but you didn’t regret the choice you had made. You loved Pennywise, but you loved the Losers, too. That was the price you paid for giving your heart to them both. Whatever the price to be paid, it was worth getting to have them all in your life, even if only for a short while longer. 

After more stories were shared, and old trinkets found and played with, Mike had gathered everyone’s attention and reminded you of why you were there. “Something happens when you leave this town.” he began. “The farther away, the hazier it all gets. But me, I never left. I remember all of it. I spent twenty-seven years researching on how we can end It once and for all. The Ritual of Chud is our only chance.” 

Eager to hear more, knowing that there really wasn’t a chance in hell that they could truly kill Pennywise, your concentration was suddenly broken by a sharp pain near your stomach. You hissed, clenching your middle with your arms and curling in on yourself. 

“Y/N?” Richie asked, eyeing you with concern. “You okay?”

The pain faded after a moment, allowing you to relax enough to address him. “I… I think so. Huh. That was weird. I don’t know what-” Suddenly the pain was back, ebbing through your lower half with more intensity, causing you to break out in a sweat even though you felt a chill creep throughout your body, regardless of the fact that you were suddenly burning up. Along with the physical changes you were enduring, you felt the mood change, tension suddenly thick in the air as their safe haven was suddenly threatened by your episode.

“Holy shit,” you groaned, not able to distract yourself from the heat building up inside of you. Much to your embarrassment and dismay, you felt your core start to grow wet, threatening to spill out of you if you unclenched your thighs. You bit your lip, trying to concentrate on your breathing rather than the agony that you were enduring. 

The others didn’t know whether to run or to coddle you. You felt their doubts, wondering if you were truly in pain or if it could be a trap, which you couldn’t blame them for. It wasn’t until you felt a familiar presence instantly appear that you noticed true terror emitting from their auras. 

“Hello,” the voice of your mate cooed softly into the dense air of the Clubhouse. 

“Oh, fuck!” Richie called out, separating himself from you while he and the others scrambled to the other side of the underground bunker to distance themselves.

Peering up at him, you relished in the immediate feeling of relief upon seeing him, despite how close in proximity he was to your loved ones. Though you were surprised that he appeared as his human self rather than the clown, you felt no anger or animosity from him in that moment - rather instead a driving hunger in its place as his eyes ravished you.

Swallowing thickly, you put up no resistance as he scooped you up into his arms, cradling you gently as he brought you close to his chest. “Hey! What the fuck are you doing to her?” Richie accused, but too terrified to move to aid you.

Pennywise’s human complection faltered as his mouth split open to reveal rows and rows of teeth as a terrifying growl ripped through his throat and he snapped his jaws at Richie, forcing him back further against the wall.

Out of the corner of your eye, you could see spots of red starting to circle the two of you, blocking your view of the rest of the losers. It took you a moment to realize that the clubhouse was filling up with balloons, shrouding you and your mate so that you could escape quickly. 

A fraction of a second later, you were moving through space, distancing yourselves further and further away from human detection, and back to the comfort of your dark and damp home in the sewers. 

As soon as you reached your destination, a fresh wave of agony mixed with arousal hit you again, so strong you could barely breathe. “Pennywise,” you whined, gripping his shirt tightly in your grasp while you shook in his arms. “What’s happening?”

The slick from your core started to run down your thighs, and you had wondered how in the hell that was possible. Pennywise remained silent while he walked a short distance before placing you on the make-shift bed, stepping back and letting his eyes wander over your writhing body.

“Penn,” you groaned again, demanding an answer. 

Licking his lips, his eyes finally met yours. The fire behind them was something you had never seen before, and it caused another shudder to wrack through your body. That’s when it finally occurred to you what was happening.

You were in heat.