My family was never normal. Of course, it took me a long time to realize that the place that I called home was the place of nightmares and the subject of endless Lifetime movies and horror movies and crime TV shows. You grow up with things being shit, you kind of don’t notice how much it smells. You don’t really stop and ask why when your dad comes home drunk, looking for somebody’s ass to beat. You don’t go to school and show the teacher the bruises you got from not being fast enough to get away. After a while, you only give your mother the barest of glances when you see her crying in a corner somewhere, because you know nothing you say or do is gonna make a damn bit of difference anyhow. You grow up that way, you learn to be tough.
I was about five years old the first time I saw my Pa fucking my sister. I remember it like it was yesterday, I’d gotten up to get me a glass of milk in the middle of the night. I remember trying to keep as silent as I could, knowing being caught out of bed was surely to get me an ass whooping I’d be feeling for days. As I was creeping down the hall to my bedroom at the end, I passed by my sister’s room, and I heard the squalling from within and it went right to my bones.
“OWWWWW DADDY. OOOOOW!”
I peeked my head around the door.
My sister must have been around five or so years old. She was a tiny thing, all blonde hair and dimples and a fair amount of freckles. But right then she might as well have been a doll being roughly thrust up and down on our father’s cock. Pa was on the bed, his pants pulled down, his cock buried up between my sister’s legs, his long, thickly veined cock ending in a mushroom shaped head struggling to break all the way into the tiny hairless slit.
“Just a little more, bitch. Oh, we are almost there. Fuck.”
I could tell when Pa had busted into her, because my sister threw back her head and let out a wail as his cock sank all the way up inside. He made a sound, a low, almost demonic sounding grunt as he grabbed her by the hips and forced her to ride him at breakneck speed. My sister’s high pitched wails rose and fell along with his moans in a sick kind of symphony. My stomach twisted in knots as I watched them, something dark and ugly growing somewhere deep down inside. I wanted to run forward and punch our father in the head and tear my sister from the room. But, though it took me many years to admit the truth, I also wanted to join him in destroying her virgin twat.
After what seemed like an eternity, Pa threw back his head and let out a loud curse. His body went rigid and my sister let out another scream, longer and more high pitched than the last. Pa smacked her upside the head and he threw her off of him. She landed with a loud thump upon the floor, clutching her freshly broken in cunt.
“SHUT UP YOU STUPID WHORE! You’re only good for fucking. Just like your Ma and every other bitch around here. You're gonna get fucked every single night as long as you live in this house. So you might as well get used to it.”
It turned out that Pa was very much a man of his word.
Growing up, I really only had three friends.
Walter Smith, a tall, lanky redhead who was a hopeless jock who always knew the latest baseball stats and had a Pa about as worthless as my own. Walter and I would always hang out in the back alley of the old liquor store, waiting around for the store keeper to take a break and sneak us out a couple of bottles of beer for pocket change. I could always rely on him for a quick laugh and some good advice. Even if I never followed any of it.
Jessy Mcnab was a scrawny little black haired kid who lived in a doublewide down the road. His mother was a fat, mean eyed cunt with a mouth about as big as her snatch must have been after popping out eight kids. Jessy never really knew who his father was. Truth be told, so many dicks passed in and out of that trailer on a daily basis in pursuit of his mother’s meat pussy, he might have passed by his real father a million times and never known it.
Steven Carlson was the only black kid in my entire school. Things were different back then, and it was a common occurrence to see Steven running around the block, a large mob of white kids trailing along behind him, waving sticks and shouting out racial slurs every step of the way. I became friends with him, not because I felt sorry for but because he was a funny, smart guy who was loyal to a fault and the best kind of friend anybody could ask for.
My Pa had run off about a month previously. So I figured it was safe to let my friends come over to hang out for a bit. Nobody knew where he went or what he did when he got his wild hairs, but, for at least a little while, there was some peace and happiness in the house. Ma would make her home cooked meals again, a big smile on her face because she knew no fist was gonna reach out and punch it off of her. I could play my radio any damn time of day I fucking wanted to. Run up and down the stairs at all hours of the day and night. Even nab the last piece of pie right out of the fridge.
My sister, though, nothing in the world seemed to make her happy. Most of the time she was laid up in her room. Soft, sad ass music coming from behind her door. It strikes me now just how little I really knew her, even though we grew up together. I can’t say that it really makes me sad or anything. That’s just the way it is sometimes.
Me and Walter and the boys stayed up most of the night playing cards and listening to the radio. Steven had nicked some cigarettes from his old man, and we all took turns trying to blow smoke rings and coughing out lungs up.
It was around one in the morning when we heard the screams.
Jessy jumped up from the bed, ready to run off and see what was going on, but I grabbed him by the arm, telling him to sit the fuck down and mind his own damn business. I knew what was going on. Pa was home. No need to go getting punched upside the head for nothing.
“What the fuck is wrong with you, man?” Jessy looked at me like I was some kind of freak. It wouldn’t be the last time somebody looked at me that way, but I have to say that, coming from him, it really hurt. A second later, he pulled out of my grasp and was running down the hall, all of us in fast pursuit.
My sister’s door was open. And there was a good bit of wailing and groaning coming from inside. We all pulled up short at the open door, a collective gasp going up as we saw what was taking place within.
My sister was naked on the bed, huge tits bouncing up and down as Pa leaned over her, his feet still on the floor. His belt was wrapped tightly around her throat and he was throttling her to death as he fucked her, his whole body covered in sweat as he savagely kept slamming her into the mattress. As we watched, he tightened the belt around her throat, her eyes becoming huge orbs as her cries grew strangely quiet. Pa continued to fuck her with even more ferocious abandon, leaning down to sink his teeth into her tender flesh while she wiggled, unable to even scream.
I’ll never forget how my sister’s body twitched as she died, her eyes still open and gazing with horror at the man fucking her. My father came at that very moment, making sure that the last thing my sister saw in life was him climaxing over her, his cock filling up her soon to be dead cunt with his cum. He leaned back when he was finished with her, a satisfied look on his face as he zipped up his fly. It was only at that moment I realized that he had been aware of our presence the entire time. For he turned to us with a roguish smile on his face.
“All any of them are good for lads. Trust me on this,” he tells us, making his way to the door. We nearly tripped over ourselves getting out of his way. “Don’t worry about it. Girls run away all the time. Nobody ever really knows where they go.”
We watched him make his way down the hall to the master bedroom, his puzzling words still echoing in our ears. They would only make sense to me later, when my sister’s body was gone and my mother was sobbing her heart out in the bedroom day after day. I would like to be able to say that I was tormented by what I had seen that night, but truth be told the human part of me had died out a long time ago. Shit happens in life. You get used to it. My old man had taught me that a long time ago.
Walter was the first of us to wander into my sister’s room. His eyes were big, his mouth hanging open in some kind of comical satire of surprise as he stared at the naked body on the bed. It occurred to us all at that moment we had never seen a naked girl before. Slowly, as if in a trance, we all make our way into the room.
My sister had been a beautiful girl, long legs and curvy body topped by a huge pair of breasts ending in these large pink nipples. Her blonde hair was spread out on the bed like an angel’s halo, the heavenly effect only ruined by the belt still wrapped tightly around her throat. We tried to keep our eyes from going to the mound between her legs. She didn't have much hair, but what she did have was more like a fine blonde peach fuzz.
Steven reached out to touch her pussy, his fingers going up inside as we all found ourselves unable to look away. A second later, his fingers came out covered in a thick white goo. We all looked at it. Then, one by one, we all took turns sticking our fingers into the still warm hole between my sister’s legs. We spread her lips apart, marveling at the sight and feel of a girl, taking turns pulling her rather pronounced clitoral hood back, greedily eyeing the clit we were not supposed to see. We stroked and felt up her large breasts, taking turns climbing on top of her with our clothes on and dry humping her, our faces pressed into those huge warm globes as we feasted on her generous nipples. The sensations were both dark and wonderfully insane.
Jessy was the first to take his pants off. He wasted no time hopping onto my sister’s body, his boy cock sinking into pussy for the first time, oblivious to us watching him as he made several deep, hard thrusts. His hands reached up to grab her tits as he closed his eyes, lost in his own climax and emptying his virgin balls up into her well used cunt. Satisfied, he climbed up onto the bed and laid down, his smile saying it all.
Walter was the next to go, his pants pulled down to his ankles as he went to town on my sister’s cunt. His mouth hungrily sucked her tits, his small butt going in and out as his cock rammed in and out of her. My eyes went from her bouncing tits to his ass, and it occurred to me that I wanted to fuck them both. There was no shame in thinking of such things then. I was just a boy. An animal, really. Only capable of knowing what felt good and what didn’t. And, at that moment, the sight of my best friend in the whole world having his first orgasm while on top of my sister, felt pretty damn good indeed.
I was the last one to go.
My hands trembled as they worked my belt, my cock, once free from the confines of my pants, was the hardest I’d ever seen it. So rigid in fact that it felt like the skin was going to burst. The urge to just plunge into my sister’s blonde cunt was so overwhelming I will never get it out of my mind for as long as I live. It was something sweet and pure and beautiful and nobody will ever be able to convince me it was wrong. It’s my favorite secret, the thing I hide so deep and protect from having sullied by those who will never understand.
I stared down, cock in my hands, pressing erection against the warmth of my sister’s cunt. My cock twitched in my hands, a fiery heat rising up from my belly and making my head swim. I swiped my cock around her clit and opening, my mind flooded with images of my sister as I sunk my cock into her warm, tightly muscled vagina. I had used my hands and a well worn sock on many occasions, but nothing compared to those first few glorious moments of feeling warm, rough ridges pulled tight around my member. It was like being stroked with steel covered in the softest velvet. Even now, all these years later, I still stroke myself to completion some night, imagining those moments of looking down and seeing my cock plunging in and out of her, my hands, pulling her labia open so that I could look at her clit and her pussy fucking me to orgasm. When I was done, I pulled my cock out of her, eyeing the sight of my thick white cum still leaking from the head of my cock and her opening. I wanted to fuck her again.
The boys left early that night. None of us said a word about no longer being virgins. We didn’t laugh and high five one another, eager to tell our stories around a pinched bottle of beer. No. The hows and whys of that night were something we would all take to our graves. Some sooner rather than later. Looking back on things, I can see how that night shaped all of our young lives. Each of us carried that secret and, like a poisoned seed, it took root inside of us and grew, its branches reaching out and entangling our hearts and minds and souls, until finally it bore its own foul fruit. I wish I could say that, deep down, knowing all this, I regretted that night. That I wish I could have jumped onto Pa’s back and punched him in the head, screamed, anything to have saved my sister’s life.
But, I’ll tell ya, I learned a long time ago, life can be hard and cruel and nasty. That’s just the way it is sometimes.