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I would let you

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Ben is annoyed. 

Snoke is riding his ass about an upcoming meeting with an important client, his new shoes are pinching his feet, and the fucking hot dog guy put fucking relish on his hot dog after Ben specifically told him not to. Fucking disgusting.

To make matters worse, a small group of people just sat down on the bench next to him and are being obnoxiously loud. Ben just wants to enjoy his meager lunch break in peace.

He scowls at the group: two girls, one with black hair and one with brunette hair pulled into three buns, and two guys. 

Ben’s scowl deepens when he notices the two guys are holding hands.

Great. Another reminder of how completely and utterly alone he is. The guys are probably soulmates , Ben thinks bitterly.

Seeing couples in public doesn’t usually bother Ben so much, but it’s been a shit day and he feels so alone seeing the two men gaze adoringly at each other. Ben knows what his soulmark says, so he knows he’ll probably never have what they have. It makes him green with envy.

Their soulmarks probably say something normal, like “nice to meet you” or “I’ve heard so much about you” or “your total is $3.75.” Some shit like that. 

Unlike Ben’s soulmark.

The first sentence your soulmate speaks to you is tattooed somewhere on your body from birth. And it’s supposed to be exactly that– one sentence . Except Ben’s mark is practically a full-length fucking novel, spanning the entirety of his back. 

And his soulmate must be quite the charmer, because– upon their first meeting– she will apparently call him a fucking prick and threaten to beat him up. 

Ben can’t wait.

His mom cried when she read his mark the first time, but his dad just laughed. 

“He’s a Solo, alright!” his dad exclaimed, patting Ben on his little newborn head. Ben was so self-conscious of his mark growing up that he never went swimming, avoiding anything that would make him take his shirt off and expose his back.

Ben is pulled from his thoughts as the group next to him laughs loudly. He glares and notices that the girl with three buns is glaring right back at him. 

Her hazel eyes gaze into his, and she looks mad . Nobody else in the group seems to notice their stare-off. Why the fuck is she glaring at me? They’re the ones being loud and obnoxious.

The guy with curly dark hair leans down and pecks the other man’s lips and Ben stands up in a huff. He doesn’t need any more reminders of how lonely he’ll be for the rest of his life. He stomps to the trash can and throws his disgusting relish-covered hot dog in the trash.

He turns to glare at the group again, who are all laughing at something the curly-haired guy says, oblivious. Ben searches for the woman with the hazel eyes but she’s not there anymore. 

As he turns around to stalk back to his office, he comes face-to-face with the woman. Startled, he jumps a little. She shoves him until they’re on the other side of the food cart, hidden from the view of her friends. 

Before Ben can get a word out, the woman shoves a sharp finger against his chest, pressing so hard into his pecs it hurts. 

“What the fuck is your problem? It’s the goddamn 21st Century. You’re lucky my friends didn’t see you or they would have beaten your ass. In fact, I’ve got half a mind to do it myself. You’ve got a lot of fucking nerve, you know that? Scowling at them like they killed your dog.” 

The woman is working herself into a frenzy, talking so fast that Ben’s head whirls and he can’t form coherent thoughts. She continues, “It's none of your fucking business. Where do you work? I ought to report you. Un-fucking-believable. Never in all my 25 years have I encountered someone so unashamedly–” 

She’s getting louder now and Ben’s heart is pounding out of his chest as her words finally resonate with him. Oh my god. It’s her . People are starting to notice them, now, and Ben’s afraid her friends might hear and investigate, which is the last thing he wants.

Without thinking, Ben reaches out to grab her shoulder. He doesn’t know his plan once his hand reaches her shoulder, but he doesn’t get that far, anyway. 

She jerks back as if he burned her, eyes ablaze in pure, unadulterated rage .

“You absolute. Fucking. PRICK!” she punctuates each word with a shove against his chest.

She looks like she’s about to tear into him again and Ben can’t take it anymore. Finally finding his voice, he yells, “Will you shut up for one fucking minute?!”

The woman gasps and her eyes widen in shock.

Fuck . Ben wasn’t even thinking about what he said, he just blurted it out. He wants to hit himself as he realizes those were his first words to her.

That went about as well as Ben expected.

 

***

 

Rey can’t believe it finally happened. She finally met her asshole soulmate. 

It went about as well as she expected, considering her soulmark (located on the back of her shoulder) says “Will you shut up for one fucking minute?”

When she was younger, Rey always thought the best of her soulmate. She’d tell herself that he didn’t actually say that to her , he was probably just saying it in the general vicinity and she happened to hear. Now she knows better.  

Her soulmate is an asshole. A homophobic asshole.

Poe, Finn, and Rose choose that exact moment to run around the other side of the cart. 

“Is that you, Rey? We thought we heard you yelling but we figured it must be someone else and–” Finn stops short, taking in the scene in front of him. “What the hell is going on?”

“Don’t worry about it, Finn,” Rey replies. She glares at her soulmate. “This homophobic asshole was just leaving.”

Her soulmate chokes on his spit, eyes bugging. “Wait, what?”

Rey rolls her eyes. He’s playing dumb now, apparently. “You weren’t exactly being subtle. I saw the way you scowled at Finn and Poe, the way you huffed and puffed when they kissed.”

“Oh my god. Oh my god .” 

Poe and Finn puff their chests out, ready to fight. They’ve dealt with homophobes before. 

The man shakes his head furiously, black hair whipping around his face. “You don’t understand, I– it wasn’t– I just–” He stops. Sucks in a deep breath. His eyes flicker nervously from Poe to Finn to Rose, and finally land on Rey. “Can we talk alone, please?”

“Like hell,” Poe growls.

Her soulmate abruptly stops and pulls off his black v-neck t-shirt, revealing his pale, muscled stomach. Rey’s eyebrows furrow in confusion. Is he planning on seducing me to get me alone with him? Fat fucking chance .

He turns around so his bare back is facing her, and Rey’s breath catches in her throat. From the nape of his neck to the planes of his lower back, are words. Rey’s words

The entirety of what she said is on his back– from the moment she shoved him behind the food cart and asked him what his fucking problem was, all the way until she called him a ‘fucking prick’.

Rey steps closer and reaches out her hand, wanting to touch the words that scar his skin. Before she makes contact, he turns back around and pulls his shirt on. 

“Please. Let me explain,” he implores again, and this time Rey just nods, too shocked to do anything else.

Despite her friends’ begging her not to go, Rey assures them she’ll be fine and follows her soulmate out of the park. They walk down the street for a few minutes before he finally speaks.

"I don't care that your friends are gay."

 

“You’re not– you weren’t glaring at Finn and Poe because you hate gay people?”

“Jesus, no. I was glaring at your friends because I was jealous.”

Oh ,” Rey exhales. It’s a relief to know her soulmate isn’t that much of an asshole. 

So is he gay, then? It’s not unheard of– soulmates not being attracted to each other. Friends can be soulmates, too. Rey can’t help but feel a little disappointed, though. 

She always thought of her soulmate as a romantic partner, not platonic.

His eyes widen as he realizes the implications of what he said. “Oh, fuck– no, I meant jealous as in like, jealous of their relationship. Because I want a relationship. But not with a guy. Not that I’m homophobic or anything, I just like women a lot. Not in a creepy way, though!” 

The tips of his ears go bright red and Rey thinks it’s adorable how much he’s floundering. She understands what he was trying to say now. 

Rey feels guilt now, deep in her chest. 

"I shouldn't have freaked out on you like that, I'm sorry. I just get so protective of my friends and I wasn't thinking straight–"

"I forgive you." 

Ben smiles softly, and his eyes are kind, understanding.

“I feel it too, you know,” Rey continues from his earlier statement.

His eyes snap up to hers and she continues, “I love Finn and Poe, but being around them sometimes is hard. It’s the same with every soulmate couple; seeing them happy and not knowing if it’s something you’ll ever get to experience…” 

She trails off and the man looks at her like his whole universe just shifted.

“I never got your name,” Rey says, trying to change the subject.

“Ben.”

His voice is soft and deep and it makes Rey’s legs feel like Jell-o. 

“I’m Rey.” She gives him her brightest smile and his gaze turns intense again. 

“Rey,” he breathes her name like a prayer. 

It feels like gravity is pushing them together; like they’re inevitable.

“I’ve never felt anything like this.” 

He echoes her words from earlier. “I know, I feel it too. Rey, I know we just met, but–”

“Yes,” she cuts him off, breathless.

Not caring about work, or his pinching shoes, or anything else besides him and Rey, Ben grabs her hand and half-runs with her back to his apartment.

 

***

 

Rey never understood soulmates. She thought it was absolutely mad that most soulmates got married within the first month of meeting each other; hell, Poe and Finn got married after two weeks. Rey always thought they were crazy.

Until she met Ben. 

Now she’s in his apartment, throwing off her clothes like they’re on fire. And he’s so goddamn handsome; Rey doesn’t know how she didn’t notice it immediately. Those full lips, dark hair, and piercing eyes. God help her.

Ben picks her up and carries her bridal style into his bedroom. It’s probably the same size as her whole apartment. 

He lays her on the bed and Rey flushes when she realizes they’re both stripped to their underwear. She runs her hand over the wide expanse of his chest, admiring how smooth and hard it is.

Ben, in turn, brushes his large hands over her breasts, barely concealed by her bralette. He doesn’t say anything and Rey is afraid he thinks they’re too small.

As if he can read her mind, he breathes out, “You’re perfect, Rey.”

She blushes at his attention. He continues to gently knead her breasts while slowly grinding his still-clothed erection against her center. She’s never seen a cock in real life before (yes, she’s one of those people who waits for their soulmate like it’s the 1950s) but she can already tell Ben is big.

They both speak at the exact same time.

“I’ve never done this before–”

“I’m a virg– oh.”

They both laugh and Ben peppers her face in affectionate kisses. 

“We can figure it out together, then.” Rey smiles up at him and he smiles back. “Can I– can I see your mark again?” Rey asks hesitantly, afraid he’ll be mad. Ben freezes on top of her, then lifts so he’s kneeling beside her on the bed. Rey holds her breath as he turns, exposing his back to her.

Rey refrains from gasping at the sight of it. The words are messy and uneven across his back, tattooed in Rey’s ugly handwriting. She’s never seen or heard of this happening– of a soulmark being more than one sentence. 

She brushes her fingertips over the tattoo reverently. “I’m so sorry,” she whispers. 

Ben’s back immediately straightens, and he turns back around to face her, cupping her face in his palm.

“What on Earth do you have to be sorry for?”

“Your mark… it must have been terrible to hide. Anyone who saw it would think you’re a monster. My awful words are stuck on your skin forever, all because I didn't stop and let you explain yourself.”

Ben lifts Rey up so she’s sitting, and turns her ever-so-slightly so he can see her mark. 

Just below the back of her left shoulder, in Ben’s impeccable handwriting, are the words he now regrets the most in his life.

Ben shudders and turns Rey back over. “I’ll never speak to you like that again, Rey. I promise.”

"I won't, either. Never."

An understanding passes through both of them as they choose to leave the past behind.

Ben kisses her again, before moving lower down her body.

Rey is confused for a moment before she realizes what he’s doing and her face goes beet red. “You don’t have to, Ben.”

“I want to. Please.” He’s looking up at her from between her thighs, giving her the biggest puppy-dog eyes she’s ever seen. “Only If you want to, of course.”

Of course I want to , Rey thinks. She nods and Ben wastes no time peeling down her already drenched panties.

His breath is hot on her thighs as he tentatively licks a stripe across her cunt. Goosebumps erupt on Rey’s arm and Ben sighs in contentment.

“Fuck, you taste so good, Rey. You’re mine. Soulmate .”

He laps at her like a starving man, overeager. What he lacks in experience he makes up for in sheer excitement. His tongue finds her clits and he circles it a few times before sucking it between his teeth and Rey hisses in pleasure.

“Does that feel good, sweetheart?”

“Yes, Ben, don’t stop,” Rey pants. It feels so good but she needs more

Ben seems to read her mind. He pushes one finger into her slick cunt easily, pumping in and out a few times before adding a second. Fuck, his fingers are so much bigger than mine. 

Rey squirms at the fullness. His thumb reaches up to rub her clit while his fingers crook inside of her just so and she falls apart. 

She convulses on his fingers, shaking and crying out his name. Ben rubs her slowly, drawing out her orgasm until there’s nothing left and she lies there, spent. 

Ben kisses her and tells her how good she did and Rey preens. She needs Ben inside her. Now. 

She tells him so, and he pulls back slightly to look in her hazel eyes. “Are you sure, Rey? We don’t have to.”

“Please, Ben,” she whines and that’s all the confirmation he needs. He’s just as desperate as she is.

He pulls down his briefs while Rey takes off her bra and throws it over the side of the bed. He inhales sharply at the sight of her bare chest and Rey smirks at him. But then it’s her turn to gape as she sees his cock, thick and hard and nearly as long as her fucking forearm. 

“Jesus…”

Ben is either unaware of her gawking or is choosing to ignore it. He leans down and latches onto a nipple, sucking it between his teeth. After he’s satisfied with his attention to both nipples, he pulls back again and lines himself up at her center. 

Ben pushes the head of his cock into her slowly and pauses.

“You okay?”

He’s big and it hurts a little, but it isn’t terrible. She’s still dripping from her orgasm and it helps ease the pain. She nods as he burrows his head in the crook of her neck and sucks.

Slowly, he sinks the rest of the way into her and Rey feels full . More than that, she feels a sense of rightness . Yes, this is where they’re meant to be.

“Shit, Rey, you feel so fucking good. I’m not gonna last long.”

Rey runs her fingers through his silky black locks. “It’s okay, Ben.” 

She means it; he already made her come once. She doesn’t expect him to be a sex God their first time.

He gives her a few seconds to adjust before he moves again. He pulls out slowly, until just the tip is in, then pushes back into her. Rey can feel every drag of his cock inside of her and she moans.

Her moans set him off, and he thrusts in and out of her faster. “It feels like you were made for me, sweetheart. Soulmate .”

Rey loves when Ben calls her his ‘soulmate’. She wants to hear him call her his wife next. 

Ben’s thrusts grow erratic and she can tell he’s close. He’s pounding into her, hitting that spot deep inside her and Rey sees stars. 

“I– I’m close,” he pants. He leans down and kisses her hard. 

He curses and then he’s pulling out of her and Rey whines at the loss. He pumps his cock in his hand a few times before shooting his spend across her stomach, coating her. Ben collapses next to her, cheeks flushed, breathing hard. 

 

***

 

When Ben’s breathing finally settles, he smiles at her, but his grin falters at her expression. Rey is looking down at the mess on her stomach, lips pouted.

 “What’s wrong? I didn’t hurt you, did I?” His eyes are panicked. He’d never forgive himself if he hurt her.

“What? No.” She seems surprised.

He sighs in relief but then his face falls again, thinking he must have disappointed her. “I’m sorry, I’ll do better next time, I promise. I’ll make you come again–”

“That’s not it, Ben.”

“Then what is it? Why are you mad?” He’s crestfallen. What did I do wrong?

“I’m not mad. At least, not at you.”

Now Ben is confused. Rey continues, “I’m just… I’m mad at myself, because we only just met and I already want–” 

Rey bites her lip to stop herself from talking. Ben’s gaze darkens; was she about to say what he thinks she was going to say? He needs to know.

“What do you want, Rey?” He prods, voice husky and deep.

Rey deliberates for a minute and then exhales. Ben tenses in anticipation, scooting closer to her.

“I didn’t make a face because I was mad. I made a face because I saw your come on my stomach and I was disappointed it wasn’t in me.” 

Ben is in shock. He never imagined in a million years he’d be talking about this with a girl he met all of two hours ago, yet here he is. 

 Rey panics at his silence. When she panics, she rambles. “You did the responsible thing, I know that. If you were anyone else I’d be pissed if you came inside without permission. Fuck, you probably think I’m crazy. But I just–” 

Her words make Ben’s blood sing. He doesn’t think he’s been this happy in his life.

 Ben stops her before she has time to get herself even more worked up.

He swiftly gathers some of his cum on her stomach, scooping it up with two fingers. Then, Ben  unceremoniously sticks his fingers deep inside her cunt, spreading his seed. 

Oh !” Rey exclaims in surprise.

Ben swallows her exclamation with a kiss, fingers still buried deep in her cunt. “I love you; I loved you from the moment you stabbed your finger into my chest. We may have only met a few hours ago, but I’d take you to the courthouse and marry you right now if you’d let me.”

Rey’s eyes glimmer with tears. 

She’s about to respond when Ben and Rey both wince and reach for their backs at the exact same moment. Ben groans– it feels like his back is on fire, but it’s over in a flash. What the…? Rey seems to share his confusion.

She scrambles up and wobbles to Ben’s vanity mirror, Ben following right behind her. She turns to look at her back and gasps.

Where Rey’s tattoo used to be is a new one. It says, in Ben’s elegant scrawl, “I’d take you to the courthouse and marry you right now if you’d let me.”

Ben is standing stock still, afraid to move. He’s scared of what he might see on his back, of what she is going to respond. But Rey isn’t. She knows exactly what she was about to say.

She grabs his broad shoulders and turns him so his back is facing the mirror. Then she nudges his jaw until he can see the reflection of his back. 

The first thing he notices is how empty it is. Like a blank canvas. 

Then Ben reads the four words on the back of his left shoulder, written in what he assumes is Rey’s adorably messy handwriting. 

He reads them at the same time Rey says them aloud.

 

“I would let you.”