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Finding Love Again

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Reid returned to the table a few minutes later but JJ figured she’d just talk to him later.

They all began to finish the breakfast that had been have eaten due to the earlier events.

JJ and Tanya sat next to each other and JJ kept her right hand placed on Tanya’s thigh the whole time, knowing she was a little uncomfortable after the whole thing and the fact
Emily was there and Reid’s feelings were unknown, it was making Tanya uneasy.

“Just relax baby.” JJ whispered in Tanya’s ear subtly. Tanya just sent JJ a small grateful smile but JJ knew she was still a little on edge. They both failed to notice Reid staring at their interaction.

JJ placed her arm around her back of Tanya’s chair discreetly, her fingers brushing her back every so often, trying to make Tanya more comfortable. It was then she noticed Reid staring at them. She looked at him out of the corner of her eyes for a few minutes and when she saw that he kept staring at them she finally spoke up.

“Ok, Reid, what is your problem?” JJ snapped, she hadn’t meant to be so harsh, she was just annoyed. The rest of the team and Tanya had all been talking amongst themselves and when they heard JJ’s voice, they turned their attention to them. “You’ve been staring at us for the last few minutes.” JJ finished.

Reid looked down, his face flushed. “Nothing.”

JJ let out a frustrated sigh. “It’s obviously something, just tell me!” JJ exploded.

“I’m just in shock. I always thought you were straight. I wasn’t expecting…this.” Reid explained gesturing towards Tanya.

JJ scoffed. “What it’s because I’m with a woman?” JJ asked incredulously and she took Reid’s silence as a ‘yes’. JJ shook her head. “So if it was a man that was sitting beside me right now you wouldn’t care?” JJ asked raising her voice slightly. “You know what, for the first time in a long time, I’m happy. I’m with someone I really, really like and finally I can be with someone who wants to be with me openly and isn’t ashamed. So I’m sorry, I really don’t care if you’re not ok with this or not, because I’m happy!” JJ said half passionately, half angrily. She didn’t want to hurt Reid but right now she herself was too hurt to really consider that.

Tanya put her hand on JJ’s arm to calm her down; she didn’t want her girlfriend to say something she might regret. But Tanya couldn’t help but think how hot JJ looked when she was angry.

“Wait, what do you mean openly and ashamed?” Hotch asked. Emily’s eyes widen, but no one could see because all their attention was on JJ and Reid.

JJ’s eyes flickered over to Emily and she could see the panic on her face and the slightly shake of her head. “N-nothing, it doesn’t matter.” JJ managed to get out, hoping the team were convinced. She turned her attention back to Reid.

JJ huffed, when all she was met with was silence.

“We’re leaving; we’ll meet you at the station in an hour.” JJ said standing up and Tanya followed. JJ placed her hand on her lower back as they walked out of the restaurant.


JJ paced up and down her hotel room whilst Tanya sat on the bed watching the blonde.

“I can’t believe!” JJ exploded finally stopping.

Tanya sighed and stood up. “I know babe, but just give it a chance, he’ll come around.” Tanya said giving JJ a tight hug.
JJ sighed resting her hands on Tanya’s hips. “I know.” JJ said shaking. “I don’t even think this is about the fact I’m gay or it’s a shock, he just doesn’t trust me not since…” JJ trailed off.

“Since what?” Tanya asked confused.

JJ sighed and motioned for them to sit on the bed. “A couple of years ago, I had to fake Emily’s death.” JJ said sadly and at Tanya’s small gasp she just continued. “It’s a long story, but basically it came down to her safety and the best way to keep her safe was to fake her death. So, Hotch and I discussed it along with one of my state department co-workers and decided that it was the best thing to do.” JJ looked away. “Reid was heartbroken. He came over to my house and cried about how much he missed Emily. The guilt destroyed me but I couldn’t tell him, one I wasn’t allowed and two because I couldn’t risk her life like that. It took time for him to trust me again but he never did fully, no matter how much he says he does.” JJ sighed, blinking back tears but a few fell.

“Hey, come here.” Tanya said pulling JJ into another hug. The blonde nuzzled into her neck and closed her eyes, relishing in the comfort from her new girlfriend. “I can’t imagine how hard it must have been for you but you can’t go about still carrying this guilt years later.” Tanya said frowning.

“I know, it’s just hard not to blame myself, even after all this time.” JJ admitted. “But thanks, I feel a lot better now.” JJ smiled pulling back from the hug.

“Good.” Tanya smiled back and placed a quick kiss on JJ’s lips, but JJ pulled Tanya back into a deeper one. They kissed passionately for a few minutes and before they knew it, JJ
had pushed Tanya back on the bed straddling her and kissing her neck.

“Mmm.” Tanya moaned. “Babe, we should stop.” Tanya managed to get out.

“What why?” JJ asked confused.

“You’re upset.” Tanya explained.

“I feel better now, honestly, I wouldn’t be doing this if I wasn’t.” JJ confirmed, before going back to kissing her girlfriend and Tanya quickly surrendered to the blonde’s wishes.