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Lucy pretends to be engrossed in her book, but in actuality, she’s watching Garcia Flynn. Ever since their trip to San Antonio, she’s been more and more curious about him. Before he was just another body in the bunker. She stood up for him and defended him, of course, since she was the one who insisted he join the team. She was the one who planned his prison escape, and she alone set up his bunk so he would have a room all his own when he got here.

He doesn’t interact with anyone unless he’s spoken to. He keeps to himself and doesn’t intrude on conversations to which he was not invited. She’s noticed that he tends to hang back and observe the team. Sometimes, he’ll speak to her or to Denise without their prompting. Lucy assumes that he feels most comfortable with them since Lucy was the one who got him out of prison, and Denise helped to execute his escape. They were his only visitors when he was incarcerated, so there’s that. He knows that Lucy trusts him and after Denise selected him for the San Antonio mission over Wyatt, Lucy’s certain that even Denise is beginning to trust him too.

Lucy flips a page of the book she’s pretending to read and raises her eyes to look over at Garcia. He’s tinkering with the broken 1950s pinball machine; a rusty toolbox is at his side. He sits down on the floor and slides underneath the machine.

Lucy glances over her shoulder.

Wyatt and Jessica are sitting at a table in the kitchen area, playing a game of checkers. Rufus and Jiya are going over computer readings on the Lifeboat just to make sure that everything is how it should be for their next time jump. Denise went home to her family for the night about an hour ago, and Connor is in his room listening to his Robert Johnson vinyl record for the thousandth time since they came back from that mission only a few days ago.

Lucy sighs and closes her book. There’s really no use in reading it since her mind is preoccupied. Three nights ago, she went to Garcia’s room with a bottle of vodka. She had been in a good mood when they returned from San Antonio. She realized that after her conversation with Wyatt in the hall, that he sucked the happy right out of her. She laid on this couch for over an hour replaying in her mind the way that Wyatt has treated her since Jessica was back in his life, and she replayed over and over again the way Garcia looked at her, the way he made her feel during their conversation in the car on their way to Johnson’s sister’s juke joint. She closed her eyes so many times imagining again the smile on Garcia’s face as he sat next to her listening to Robert sing as he recorded his records.

It was the happiest she had felt since before her sister was erased from existence.

Laying there on this couch, she had fought mind versus heart about whether or not to get up and go knock on Garcia’s bunk door. She was alone. Lonely. And she needed a friend to talk to. Sitting there on Garcia’s bed that night she realized just how long she had felt alone.

Before everything fell apart, back when they were chasing Garcia through time, she didn’t have time to pause and think about what her life had become. She assumed that Wyatt, Rufus and even Jiya were her friends. But were they really? She’s been back for not even two months now and any conversation she’s had with Jiya was about work. Any conversation she’s had with Rufus was about work. And even with Wyatt, any conversation they had – outside the one that night in Hollywood – was about work. They are her co-workers, friendly acquaintances with whom she shares living space.

Then there is Garcia Flynn.

Talking with him was different. She went to his room not knowing what to expect. All she knew is that she didn’t want to drink alone anymore, and she wanted to continue conversations they had had in the car in 1936. In the car they talked about their work, and he apologized for what happened to Amy even though it wasn’t his fault. It came as a surprise to her when he talked about his wife so she took the opportunity and told him some of her fondest memories of Amy.

In his room, they talked about what they wanted to be when they grew up. He talked about how his grandmother helped raise him in Croatia – then Yugoslavia – before the war. After a while, she forgot all about the bottle of vodka she had brought with her and she opened up to him. Telling him about her childhood, pranks she and Amy used to play on their mother, names of her pet fish, and stories about her father – the man who raised her, Henry Wallace.

Talking with Garcia was a relief. She felt she could let down her guard and not worry about being judged. He was a good listener, always following up with questions. They laughed. Two broken souls who had had so much taken from them by Rittenhouse could find laughter together in a world that was falling apart. She woke up the next morning in his bed. She hadn’t intended on falling asleep in his company. She was touched that he attempted to flirt with her even though it was somewhat awkward. She’s not blind, he is a good-looking man and she enjoyed his attempt to flirt with her very much.

It surprised her more than him when she told him that he was the easiest person for her to talk to among everyone else here in the bunker. It warmed her heart to see his modest smile. He appreciated her words, but the meaning behind her words must have scared him so he brought up how they both lost their families to Rittenhouse, and that they were both alone – as if those things were the only reason they enjoyed each other’s company, and why she finds him the easiest to talk to.

That night in his room, he managed to make her laugh, and more importantly, he managed to make her forget what was waiting for them both outside his bunk door: loneliness, rejection and for her… Wyatt Logan’s relationship drama.

Lucy stands up and slowly makes her way over to the pinball machine. She knows she’s risking the judgment of the others by going to Garcia and treating him as an equal and as her friend, but she doesn’t care. She looks down and only his legs are sticking out from underneath the machine. She sits down cross-legged and watches him. He is unscrewing a metal panel and the screw falls down onto his face. He shakes his head so that it falls to the floor. He sees her and flashes a smile.

“Hi.” She says.

“Finish your book?” He asks as he focuses on what he’s doing.

“No. I couldn’t concentrate.”

“Oh?”

“Everyone else is off doing their own thing and I was lonely so…”

“You can help me try to fix this thing if you want.” He suggests, feeling around the floor for the screw that had fallen on his face.

Lucy picks it up and hands it to him. She takes him up on his offer to help even though she knows nothing about pinball machine repair. She lies down next to him, taking extra care that her arm rests snugly against his. She’s testing the water to see how he reacts to her touching him in a platonic manner, just to see how far she might be able to take touching him in the future. He doesn’t move away from her and seems quite comfortable with her.

“I know nothing about fixing pinball machines.” She tells him.

“That’s ok. Neither do I. I’m… just…” He tightens a screw. “… guessing.” He turns his head to her and smiles. “To be honest, I was hoping to get this thing fixed so next time Wyatt uses up all the hot water, I can come out here early the next morning and play the game to wake him up.”

“He’s an early-riser.” Lucy reminds him.

“I know, but I would get up at three in the morning just to piss him off.”

Lucy takes the screwdriver out of Garcia’s hand and sets it on the floor beside her. He turns his head and looks at her expecting an explanation. Only… he holds his breath as Lucy drapes her arm across his torso. She yawns. He doesn’t know what to do with his hands so he leaves them hovering above his head. He doesn’t want to touch her uninvited.

For four years, he’s known that he and Lucy grow close, but never once thought she would so soon be cuddling with him underneath a rusty old pinball machine.

This wasn’t in her journal.

They are meant to find this closeness after they survive the sinking of the Titanic.

Not now.

He waits for what seems like forever and his hands tingle as the blood drains from them. It feels like an eternity before he speaks.

“Lucy…?” His voice cracks with uncertainty.

“Hm?”

“If you’re tired, I can tell everyone it’s time to go to bed so you can go to sleep.” He pauses. “Or… if you want to take my bed for the night, I can take the couch.”

Lucy opens her eyes and looks up at him. She laughs when she sees his hands are hovering above his head. She sits up and hits her head on the pinball machine. She lets out a small yelp and holds her hands to her head. Immediately, Garcia sits up to check on her and whacks his head hard on the underside of the machine as well. They look at each other as they wince in pain and start giggling like schoolkids.

“Sounds like you two are having fun over here.” Jessica Logan interrupts as she sits down on the floor next to Lucy. She picks up the screwdriver.

“We uh… we both sat up and hit our heads on this damn thing.” Garcia explains as he maneuvers out from under the pinball machine with Lucy.

“Yeah, I noticed it was broken.” Jessica says. “I used to fix these things all the time in high school.” She lays down and examines the underside of the machine. “I worked at a mall arcade, and was the only one who had a father who taught me how to tinker around with things to figure out how to fix them. He was an electrical engineer.”

“I spent high school in a library with my nose stuck in books.” Lucy says.

“And you?” Jessica asks Garcia as she tinkers around with what he had been attempting to fix.

“I never… I never finished high school. My uh… my dad died in the war when I was fifteen, and I enlisted in the army against my mother’s wishes. After that, I hopped from one army to the next, fighting in other wars.” Garcia rubs the back of his neck nervously. “I read a lot of books and educated myself, to make a long story short.”

“Didn’t finish high school, huh?” Wyatt chimes in, having made his way over, concerned about what is being discussed outside his presence.

All three of them look up at Wyatt. He has a towel slung over his shoulder indicating that he’s on his way to the showers to use up all the hot water again.

“Looks like that’s another thing that I have on you, huh, Flynn?” Wyatt smirks at Garcia hoping it makes him feel small. “So… what? You’re only middle-school educated?” He laughs, shaking his head to shame Garcia as he walks away toward the communal showers.

“What an asshole.” Jessica says loud enough that they all know Wyatt heard her. She looks at Garcia. “I’m sorry.”

“No need to apologize. It’s not your fault that he’s an ass.” Garcia says.

Lucy excuses herself from the conversation and chases after Wyatt.

“Wyatt!” She calls out.

He turns around and looks behind Lucy to see if she’s being followed. She isn’t so he steps toward her, wrapping his arm around her waist.

“Come to join me in the shower, babydoll?” He winks at her.

Lucy pushes him away.

“No.” She shakes her head in disbelief. “That was really rude of you to say to Flynn.”

“And?”

“And I think you should apologize to-”

“Apologize to a murderer and a terrorist?” He scoffs. “I don’t think so, Lucy.”

Without another word, Wyatt turns his back to her and disappears into the restroom.

-----

Despite being almost one-hundred feet below ground, the common area isn’t very dark at night even with all the lights switched off. They have to leave the computers on since they are linked to the Lifeboat which is linked to the Mothership. If they turned off the computers, the alarms wouldn’t sound if Rittenhouse made a time jump. A dim light is always left on above the counter in the kitchen area in case anyone needs to get up to make themselves a midnight snack.

Lucy lies on the couch, her arm resting on her forehead. For the third night in a row, she can’t sleep. It’s three in the morning and she’s restless. She considers turning on the TV to watch a movie to help lull her to sleep, but decides against it in case the noise would wake up Connor whose room is right next to the living area of the bunker. She’d get up to make herself a sandwich, but doesn’t because she’s apparently too tired to put something together to eat.

She lifts her head and looks at the pinball machine. Wyatt did use up all the hot water last night, and Garcia and Jessica managed to get the thing fixed and… well, it is three in the morning. She wonders if Garcia will be joining her soon to play a round of pinball. After the way Wyatt spoke to Garcia last night, and his disgusting adulterer behavior towards her, she thinks it would be fitting to wake Wyatt up from his beauty sleep. The poor thing must be so exhausted after loudly having sex with Jessica for nearly an hour straight a few hours ago.

Poor Jessica.

Though to be fair… Jess does sound like a broken record, faking it to get the deed over with quickly. Lucy understands, Wyatt wasn’t all that proficient in bed with her either.

Lucy sits up and stretches her arms above her head and yawns. She hates trying to sleep on this couch. But it’s not like she can ask either one of the couples to split up so she can bunk with either Jiya or Jessica. Well… she could ask Jessica if they could share a room. After Jess called him an asshole last night, she wonders if Jess would find it fitting for Wyatt to end up on the couch for a few nights.

It also sucks that she can’t change into more comfortable clothes to sleep in. She’s quite modest and would hate for Rufus or Connor to wake up before her and see her sprawled out on the couch wearing her short terry cloth pajama shorts and camisole. Instead, she just wears whatever it is she wore the day before. Tonight, that’s jeans and a burgundy blouse.

But maybe…

She stands up and uses the elastic band on her wrist to pull her hair back into a ponytail.

Maybe… she could sneak into Garcia’s room and cuddle up next to his warm body to finally get some sleep.

She makes her way down the hallway and stops at Garcia’s bunk door. She wants to knock, but he did say that she was welcome in his room anytime so… she quietly opens and shuts the door behind her.

His room is dark even though the dim moonlight shines in through the frosted windows. Garcia is asleep in his bed, his feet hanging over the end. She knew he was too tall for these beds, now she has definitive proof of that. He has a blanket pulled up to his chin, and she doesn’t blame him. It’s another cold April night and the heater in the bunker isn’t quite up to par.

She keeps an eye on him as she unbuttons her jeans and slips out of them. She unbuttons her blouse and throws it onto the chair in the corner of the room along with her jeans.

You were a gentle and responsive lover…

His voice echoes in her mind as she contemplates for only a second to get into bed with him, wearing only her white lace bra and panties, and kissing him awake, seducing him. To show him just how gentle and responsive a lover she could be. It’s been three nights since he said those words to her and the thought of making love to him very rarely leaves her mind.

She unhooks her bra and slips it off her body. She sighs as she rummages through his clothes, looking for a long-sleeve shirt to wear to bed.

“Lucy…?” Garcia’s voice is groggy. “What’re you doing?”

Lucy turns around to face him, holding his grey long-sleeve shirt over her breasts.

“I couldn’t sleep so…”

Without a word, Garcia opens his blanket to her, inviting her into bed with him. It’s dark and Lucy’s sure that he can’t see that she’s wearing only her panties. She quickly slips his shirt over her head and crawls into bed with him. He moves over to give her what little space he can on the small bed. The mattress is warm and he pulls the blanket back over both of them. Lucy rests on her side and hesitates to drape her arm across his waist. It’s one thing to cuddle with him in front of friends underneath a pinball machine, it’s a whole other monster to do the same alone, and in bed with him. But the bed barely fits just him, never mind the two of them, so she needs something to hold onto to keep herself from falling out.

And that something just happens to be Garcia Flynn.

He lets out a soft chuckle as her arm rests against his bare skin. Lucy’s heart pounds in her chest, realizing that he’s not wearing a shirt. Curious, she drapes her leg over his and sure enough – or so she hopes – he’s only wearing his boxer briefs to bed.

“Your hair smells like strawberries.” He whispers as he settles comfortably next to her. Lucy’s not sure that he’s awake enough to know that she’s crawled into bed with him. “I like it.” He says, nuzzling his face into her neck. He wraps his arms around her, strong enough that there’s no way that he doesn’t fully realize she’s lying next to him.

It would be so easy to seduce him… Lucy thinks as she places her hand along the side of his face. She watches him. His chest rises and falls as he breathes. His eyes are closed and he is at peace. She can’t stop herself from thinking about what it would be like to kiss him, to get to know him more intimately. She closes her eyes and imagines how he might react if she slowly moved her hand to rest between his legs. She lets out a heavy sigh. She won’t do that though no matter how large the temptation might be.

She forces her thoughts back to their previous mission to 1919. It was the day after their trip to San Antonio and Wyatt had forced himself to team up with Lucy. She wanted to be with Garcia, but she also wanted to talk to Wyatt, to let him know how she felt about him pursuing her despite trying to work on his marriage to Jessica. She didn’t correct him when he assumed that she had slept with Garcia the night before. Eventually, she told him the truth so he might understand how disgusting it was of him to slut shame her for just spending time with a friend. Of course, that went right over his head and he looked relieved as if he still had a chance at getting back together with her.

Any feelings that she may have had lingering for Wyatt Logan are gone. He’s shown his true colors and she is not interested.

And a couple nights ago, she and Jiya stayed up late watching the movie Titanic and got to talking and… Lucy looks at Garcia. She doesn’t think that he’s fallen back asleep and there’s something that’s been on her mind that she would like to know.

“Jiya told me how you reacted when Emma threatened me.” She whispers, wanting anything to talk about whatever is or could be happening between the two of them. “Rufus told her that…” She trails off as Garcia opens his eyes.

It was already quiet in his room, but now the silence rings loudly in her ears. Perhaps it wasn’t wise to bring that up right now. But she wants to know the truth. She caresses her thumb against his jaw and gazes at his lips before looking into his eyes. He’s thinking.

“You’re my only friend, Lucy… of course I was upset to find out that Rittenhouse gave direct orders to kill you.”

“No… not that, I…”

Garcia props himself up on his elbow and looks down at her. His hand holding onto her hip. Lucy closes her eyes and imagines for only a moment his hand moving from her hip to between her legs. She licks her lips and shoves the thought to the back of her mind.

“What is it, Lucy?” His voice is a soft whisper, as if speaking gently to his lover.

Lucy averts her eyes, lowering them to stare at his chest. Her hands follow her eyes and lightly brush over his chest hair. All she wants to know is if he loves her, or if he’s falling in love with her.

“How do you feel about me?” She asks.

He swallows hard but doesn’t move away from her. She feels his thumb move against her hip. She’s nervous and wishes she could take back her question and just go to sleep and deal with this another day. She clears her throat and attempts to talk her way out of this.

“Jiya said that Rufus thinks that-”

“I love you.”

Lucy’s heart jolts and her face flushes. She opens her mouth to speak, but can only bite gently on her lower lip.

“You… love me?” Her voice quivers.

“No. I mean… I was… Lucy, I was finishing your sentence, your thought process, whatever.” He wets his lips nervously. “Rufus thinks that I love you.” He repeats what she was saying as explanation.

“Oh.”

Her heart sinks.

That’s an unexpected reaction to finding out that Garcia Flynn doesn’t love her. That tells her everything she needs to know about her feelings for him. She’s falling for him, but her feelings are not reciprocated.

She sits up and places her feet on the floor. Why did she have to change out of her own clothes? This is not going to be a quick getaway. She stands up and hurries to the chair and grabs her clothes. She hears Garcia move on the bed behind her. She looks back and he’s walking toward her.

“Did I say something wrong?” He asks.

“No, I…”

Frustrated, and only wanting out of his room, Lucy drops her clothes on the ground and leaves. She’s running down the hallway as tears begin to fall down her face. She wipes them away with the sleeve of Garcia’s shirt. She looks around the common area frantically. She has no place to go. No room of her own. She can’t even leave the bunker without setting off an alarm. She runs toward the pinball machine so she can pretend she’s doing something else as Garcia catches up to her. She launches the ball into the play field. The machine lights up as the pinball hits several bumpers making its way down toward the drain. She’s positive that the noise is going to wake everyone up, and that might be for the best because then it won’t just be she and Garcia, and maybe if they weren’t alone he would just go back to his room and leave her alone.

“Lucy… hey…”

He steps into her peripheral vision – he too didn’t bother to change into clothes – and watches as she ignores him, using the flippers to launch the ball back up into the play field of the game. She can’t stop her tears from streaming down her face, and she knows that he can see her crying. He remains quiet, only stepping closer to her once the pinball disappears down the drain. He touches her shoulder and she jerks away from him, angrily launching the pinball into the game again. She raises her shoulder to her face to wipe her tears away.

But he won’t leave.

He doesn’t get that she wants to be left alone.

Isn’t it bad enough that she’s realized that her feelings for him are growing into love and he just told her that he doesn’t love her?

Pissed off, Lucy slams both her hands hard against the machine and glares up at Garcia. She wants for him to say that he loves her, and it hurt when she misunderstood when he said “I love you.” She’s embarrassed at how she feels for him, and for how poorly she’s handling the situation. But she’s nothing more than just a friend to him, which is all well and good, but… fuck. She’s falling in love with him. She shouldn’t, but she is.

“Lucy, I want to apologize but to do it I need to know what I did wrong.” He remains calm.

He steps in front of her and places his hands on her waist. His eyes beg her to just talk to him.

Lucy shakes her head, resisting him. Then without allowing herself to doubt herself, she wraps her arms around his neck and kisses him. He doesn’t move and his grip on her waist tightens. Lucy parts her lips and kisses his bottom lip, and God she wants him to kiss her back. She wants him to take back saying that he doesn’t love her. And as her lips explore his, she knows that after tonight things between them will most certainly change. She knows that by kissing him that she is building a wall and destroying whatever existed of their fragile friendship that had only just begun.

She runs her hand up the back of his neck and into his hair. Her other hand slowly makes its way down his chest, her fingers teasing his greying chest hair. She kisses him again and again, tears streaming down her face, knowing that this is the end of everything they worked through to become friends.

After tonight, she knows that she’ll never be able to go to his room to talk. She’ll never be able to sit down next to him and talk about what books they’re reading. There will never be another night where they sit in each other’s silent company and watch old movies. Her kisses ensure that tomorrow he becomes just like Rufus, and Jiya, and Wyatt, and Denise, and Connor… a co-worker, and probably not a friendly acquaintance. She knows that she’ll regret kissing him, but in this moment, she doesn’t care.

Her tongue glides into his mouth and intertwines with his. Her kiss has slowed and he’s kissing her back. His hands run up her back, underneath her shirt. His skin touching hers. His hand drifts down to rest on her lower back, his thumb massaging her skin. He slowly moves his hands to cup her ass, and he lifts her up onto the plexiglass top of the pinball machine so she can sit facing him.

He pulls back and looks into her eyes. He cups her face with his hand and kisses her. Lucy closes her eyes and whimpers as she opens her mouth to him. She wraps her legs around his body, drawing him to her. The throbbing between her legs is unbearable and she presses her heels into his back to press his body against her center. She’s sure that sex on top of an antique pinball machine is a bad idea, but if neither one of them suggests taking things back to his bunk, they might just find out.

His hands run up her thighs, pressing the palm of his hand over her center, applying a gentle pressure against her. She moans her approval. And if he keeps this up, she’s certain she’ll come sooner rather than later.

His heart is racing as he continues to press his palm against Lucy. Her panties are soaked with her arousal and he works slowly on her, making sure not to apply too much pressure on her clit so that she doesn’t come too quickly. He continues to kiss her and enjoys feeling her moan into his mouth as he pleasures her. He prays that she knows that yes, he loves her. She left his room so quickly that he didn’t have a chance to clarify to her how he feels. He never wanted to hurt her, and he never wants her to feel that he doesn’t care for her, that he doesn’t love her.

Abruptly, Lucy pushes at his chest and he watches as she peels his shirt from her body. She throws it to the ground. His eyes fall on her breasts. He lowers his head and places a kiss on her collarbone, and then even lower and gently sucks on her nipple as he cups her breast in his hand. He looks up into her eyes and she looks down at him, biting her lower lip as she slowly thrusts against his other hand. He angles his palm and presses it firmly against her clit. She gasps, and in the moment, he considers gently pushing her down to lie on top of the pinball machine so he could peel off her panties, spread her legs and taste her. He doesn’t though because this isn’t the proper time or place for him to dedicate the time to give her proper oral.

Lucy lifts his chin with her fingertips. She wraps her arms around his neck and rests her forehead against his. She gasps as she orgasms, slowly thrusting her center against his hand. He can feel her muscles contract in his palm and he gradually eases his pressure between her legs.

Their breathing is heavy and her hand grasps onto the back of his neck.

“I… I’m… Garcia…” She whispers his name and it sends blood rushing straight to his dick.

“We should take this back to my room, huh?” He asks, breathless.

She nods her head and slides off the top of the pinball machine. She steadies herself on him, intentionally running her hand against his erection. They gaze into each other’s eyes as she takes his hand to lead him back to his room, not caring to pick up her shirt which she carelessly threw to the floor. When they turn around, they see the shocked and somewhat horrified faces of Connor (jaw dropped, yet kind of amused), Jiya (grinning from ear-to-ear), Rufus (confused and a little perturbed), Jessica (flashing an I-told-you-so look at her husband), and Wyatt (pissed the fuck off).

Garcia stands behind Lucy to conceal his full erection. He reaches around her and places both hands on her bare breasts to cover her.

Garcia and Lucy aren’t sure how long they’ve been standing there watching them in a state of shock. No one knows what to say, well… almost no one…

“Looks like I still know how to fix a pinball machine.” Jessica says as she grabs Wyatt by the arm to lead him back to their room. “Ok, everyone… back to bed. Let’s leave these two love birds to it.”

Jessica starts dragging Wyatt out of the room. She glances back and no one else is moving. She snaps her fingers and raises her voice. “HEY! I said get back to bed.” She winks at Garcia and Lucy and adds, “and you two… get a room.”