Chapter 1: Can we Talk About This? But Not Directly, Because I'm Too Embarrassed.
Do you ever have those moments- where one word, or action, or look becomes the biggest regret of your entire existence? Where you had the perfect thing going, a relationship of equal give and take with no boundaries or requirements. And then you fuck it up in 2 seconds by the smallest of measures? Well, I know how that feels first hand, and let me tell you it sucks. This was the exact reason Shiro and I hadn't spoken in a few days, mostly due to me trying to avoid him. I sighed, laying on my back on the bed in my dorm with my arm over my eyes, trying to push through the coulda, shoulda, woulda, scenarios plowing through my head at the moment.
“I'm such an idiot…” I mumbled to myself. There was a knock at the door and I leaned up, eyes squinted, but good enough vision to see via the video feed on the wall that Lance was at my door.
“Hey, Keith? Are you okay? You haven’t come out of your room in like 48 hours…” he paused. “Pidge asked me to ask.” then from the background, I could hear Pidge faintly say something along the lines of ‘no I didn't Lance, he would never fall for that.’ I laid my head back down on the pillow and contemplated letting him in.
“Keith, if you don't open this door - or at least talk to me- I'm going to get Shiro.” and the decision was made and I opened the door. Avoiding. Remember?
“What the hell do you want Lance.” I slammed open the door, eyes half-lidded with irritation and a glare present on my feature.
“I just wanna make sure you're not dead. Do you need to talk?" There was a pause as I contemplated his offer. I groaned as I got up off the bed to open the door.
"Fine…" I said opening the door wider so he could enter the room. He looked down at the floor, walking as if on a minefield to avoid all the clothes and other various items that littered its surface.
"You're the room's a mess…" he murdered.
"No shit, are you sure about that?" My words dripped with sarcasm. I walled to the bed, stepping on whatever my feet landed on, feeling lances glare on me after my comment.
"So what's up? You and Shiro haven't talked in like a week. Are you avoiding him?" I immediately went on defense.
"No Lance- I'm not avoiding him!" I raised my voice on impulse, not able to control my reactions to the topic.
"Jeez okay okay." He threw his hands up in surrender. "So what's wrong then?"
"Well… I might have… called him ...alpha." I braced for every snarky comment in the book and belting laughter. He did not disappoint.
He burst into a laughing fit that earth itself could hear.
"Y-you called Shiro A-alphaaaaa" he was crying at this point. A dark red hue painted my cheeks at this moment.
"Well it was during my heat and I just couldn't stop myself! It's not my fault...the look in his eyes... I saw disgust.." I looked down at my hands, playing with nothing in particular to distract myself.
Lance continued his laughing fit, unable to hear my mumbling over the sound of him bellowing half-finished words. I growled lowly.
"I knew this was a bad idea…" I got up, grabbing his forearm and pulling him out the door. After he was out I slammed it closed, turned so my back rested on its surface and slid down in defeat.
"It's not my fault…." I mumbled and buried my head in my arms. I waited until lance and pidge had left the hallway to sneak out of my room. I quietly tiptoed across the floor to one of the rooms along the outer edge of the castle, eyes watching as we passed star after star.
"Hello, Keith." I turned around to see Allura walking up to me, a soft smile on her face.
"Hey, Allura." I returned my gaze to the universe around us.
"Are you ok? Lance was worried about you.” Irritation sparked in my gut.
"Yeah, I'm fine." I snapped.
"He told me about what was wrong. It's okay that you called Shiro that. It's only natural after you both using the other to satisfy your omega and alpha tendencies." I looked at her, a very apparent blush on my cheeks.
"Y-you knew?" Her eyebrows raised as a small smirk pulled at the corner of her lips.
"I think all the planets we have passed know. You're not very subtle about it." I turned away after that comment. She chuckled, placing a hand on my shoulder. “Hey, do you want to talk about it?”
I thought for a moment. “Well to do that I would have to start at the beginning…” she smiled.
“I’ve got time.” so I began.
Chapter 2: Past meets Present
Pidge and Shiro talk about what happened
I'm so sorry in advance... maybe.
Next chapter is basically pure smut so stay tuned!!!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
I walked down the halls of the ship, searching for that messy mop of black hair so I could apologize. I didn't mean to react to how I did, I was just in shock. But not in a bad way, no not at all. I sighed.
“You okay Shiro?” I turned to see the pidge holding a bowl of what looked like barf. I grimaced.
“Yeah, I'm fine. More importantly, what is that?” I pointed to the concoction in her hands.
She looked down. “Oh, this? It's for a hunk. Apparently, this is...dinner?” she didn't sound convinced, and my almost barfing accident showed I wasn't either. “Yeah. ditto” she said starting to walk away towards the kitchen. “By the way, ya know you can always talk to me about whatever is going on.” I sighed and smiled.
“I know. Thank you pidge.” she nodded with a smile and we started to walk separate ways. “Actually…” I started. She looked at me confused. “It would be nice to talk to someone. After you deliver that...stuff...to hunk, could you meet me in the dining hall?”
“Of course!” she continued on her current task and I made my way to our meeting place. I hadn't told anyone about Keith and me although he is loud...so maybe they already knew?
About 10 minutes later Pidge showed up and sat in a chair next to me. “So what's up?” I leaned back. How do I say this??? I thought.
“So Keith and I were having sex behind your guys back.” her jaw dropped, then she burst into laughter. “What?” I looked at her confused
“I..I just...diddon't think that's how you would come out and say it!!!!” she continued laughing, almost falling out or her chair.
“So...you knew?” she literally fell out of her chair. After she gathered herself and sat back down, she giggled.
“Are you kidding me? Do you realize how loud Keith is?!” called it. I thought to myself. Secretly, I loved that Keith was so loud, I wanted to make him scream my name endlessly without holding back... but maybe not on a ship with other people.
“He is..” I tried to find words to finish my sentences.
“Probably deaf? Like the rest of us?” she smirked at me and I chuckled. “So what's wrong? I haven't seen you guys talk in a few days I think.`` I sighed and looked away, also trying to grasp the reasoning behind the lack of conversation between us.
“I'm not sure honestly…” I crossed my arms and leaned back in my chair.
“Hmm… well, what was the last thing you guys talked about or did?” I thought about the question.
“Well… he did call me Alpha when he orgasmed…” she looked at me with wide eyes and then burst back into laughter.
“Well, that's probably why he's not talking to you! I bet you he's really embarrassed.” she continued to giggle afterward. “I bet he was a blushing mess afterward huh?” she smirked and poked my shoulder wanted me to reveal the information.
“I wasn't really looking, to be honest. I was kind of shocked.”I rubbed the back of my head, realizing my mistake.
“Well, all I can offer advice wise is that I'm just a beta, but if I was in Keith’s position, I would feel like I just made the world's biggest mistake.” she paused. “How did this happen by the way. I would have assumed that you would have marked Keith by now.”
“Well…not exactly... I'll start from the beginning”
~6 months ago~
I was walking down the halls of the ship, having just woken up and on my way to the gym, I was stopped by the sweetest aroma I had ever smelled coming from Keith's room. My head became clouded by the scent and I dropped a pair of running shoes in my hands. I shook my head to free myself from its grasp. Curiously I knocked on Keith's door. “Keith? Are you okay?” he didn't respond for a few minutes and I assumed he was sleeping, but my gut said there was something else. I knocked again, louder this time. “Keith, if you don't respond I’m going to come in.” I waited; within seconds he responded.
“I”-I’m fine Shiro. Just not feeling well.” his voice was strained and broken. My eyebrows furrowed. Something About The situation didn't sit right with me. But I accepted his response and respect his space.
“Okay, I hope you feel better soon Keith.” I picked up the shoes and headed to the gym. After working out for a few hours, I walked back to my room for a shower. I was stopped by the sweet smell again, which seemed to be coming from Keith's room. I debated whether I should check in on him again, not wanting to invade his privacy. I sighed and decided to knock against better judgment.
“Keith, I know you’re not feeling well, but I can't help but feel like it’s more than that…” I waited for a response, anything at all. But I received nothing back. Complete silence feels as I stood there, attempting to hear what was going on behind the door in front of me. No matter how focused and concentrated I was, I couldn't hear anything. Then, just a si was about to give up and walk to my room, I heard a sound that sparked a new side of me that I didn't know I had- A small, breathy and frustrated almost... whine.
Within a few seconds I was busting down his door and entering the room to a sight I didn't know I needed so bad. My mind was fogging over and my body moved on autopilot; as if I was watching myself in a video game. Keith was laying on his stomach on his bed, slick dripping out of his- my story was cut off abruptly.
“Okay I get it, I don't need the details…” Pidge shook her hands no, brows furrowed and face scrunched like she smelled rotting food goo. Which was a possibility all things considered? I chuckled. I continued thinking about that first time. Keith's sweet smell, his tight warmth which overtook my mind as I entered him. The soft whining when I didn't move right away. The whisperings of how much he needed me. All that mattered in those moments were Keith; even after we stopped he was still in the very front of my mind always. Truth be told I had liked the messy teen since we were in cadet school together; even if I never told him.
“So basically what you’re saying is that your rut kicked in when you smelled Keith's pheromones and that started everything.” I nodded.
“Yeah, I guess so.” she grinned.
“Well then, of course, he is going to call you that! You guys are a match Shiro!” she exclaimed.
“What do you mean?” confusion settled on my features as I listened to her explanation.
“Basically if you're rut was activated by smelling him then that means your ‘Alpha side’” she air quoted. “Wants him, and he slicked for you which means the same thing on his end. If an omega does not accept the partner it won't slick for them." I took it all in. so Keith actually does want me then… I got up, a new determination in my eyes. “He was talking with Allura last I saw him by the way.” Pidge smiled. “You got this,” she said as I walked towards my new goal with a fire inside my gut and a glint in my eyes.
sorry not sorry?hehe