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boy you got my heartbeat drumming

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If anyone had told him that college was going to be about crushing inhumane deadlines, sleeping at 4AM after camping out in the library for twelve hours, trying to juggle a social life in between attending head-ache inducing parties, Jeno thinks he might not have gone at all.

At the moment, he’s dragging his feet after not sleeping for a record forty hours just preparing for his organic chemistry final exam. If he wasn’t a scholarship student, he probably wouldn’t have studied so hard but Jeno’s got a stellar GPA to maintain and he’ll be damned if he loses it especially since it includes a full ride and subsidized dorm housing. He doesn’t bust his ass working as Professor Doyoung’s research assistant for nothing either and he’s got needs. Like an amazing internship at a firm this summer, if his grades can just keep it’s shit together.

So here he is, slotting his keys in the socket and twisting the doorknob to plant himself face first in the sofa. The door closes behind him with a slam, announcing his entrance to the other occupant of the apartment. He feels a warm hand rub circles into his back, soothing the tightness of his muscles from bending over a desk and scribbling lines and lines of formulas in a last-ditch effort to hoist his grades up before showtime.

“Finally done with finals?” Jaemin asks with a lazy drawl.

Jeno groans and curls even further into the sofa. “I hope I get a high enough score to maintain my GPA.”

Jaemin sighs. “I like how you’re not worrying if you failed the exam, like I did when I took my last one for Accounting earlier.”

“Sorry,” Jeno says as he scoots up on Jaemin’s lap and nuzzling into his chest. “I’m being insensitive.”

“No, you aren’t. I love your brain. I just wish you could share it sometime.”

“Me too. Then I’d be able to go through an oral report without stuttering for once.”

Jaemin laughs, the sound vibrating in his chest. The kind that makes the fireflies in Jeno’s stomach move. God, he loves him so much.

Carefully they relocate to the bed, Jaemin kissing him lazily. Open-mouthed and loose. Biting his lower lip and leaving small hickeys on the expanse of Jeno’s neck. He hums, pleased but he can’t help the yawn that escapes his mouth.

Jaemin looks at him, a fond smile on his face. “Am I boring you?”

“No, I’m just tired and I’ve been awake for like 38 hours.”

“Do you want to take a nap?”

Jeno yawns in response before tangling his legs together with his boyfriend. “Let’s finish this later when I wake up.”

Jaemin gives him a last, lingering kiss on his lips. “Okay, I’ve got a surprise for you too when you wake up.”

“Good surprise?”

Jaemin hums. The steady beat of his lover’s heart lulling him to sleep.


The next time he wakes, the sun has disappeared and the night has risen. Jaemin’s playing his nineties era pop classics on the speaker, the smell of dinner wafting through the air.  Jeno loves his boyfriend so much. Loves the way he cares for him and wraps his arms around him and most importantly, feeds him because Jeno can’t cook a decent meal to save his life. He remembers his life vividly before Jaemin and compares it constantly to life after Jaemin. It’s a no-contest that his quality of life’s improved in the double digit, exceeding expectation mean of a bell curve.

The lights in their bedroom opens and Jaemin comes through the door carrying a tray of food. “Oh, you’re up. I was about to wake you. I cooked you some kimchi spaghetti.”

Jaemin sets the food on the foldable table they keep by the bedside. Jeno scooting up on the headboard. His stomach rumbling at the sight.

“I love you so much,” he says. Jaemin smiles before leaning in to give him a small peck on the lips. “I love you too but I’m starving and I want to eat this with you.”

Jeno finds he likes nights like this, with no clear destination, unhurried but brimming with the promise of a wonderful evening nevertheless. The food is good, Jeno tells him as much. He eats as much as his stomach would allow, Jaemin laughing as Jeno burps while washing the dishes.

Later, when they’re all curled up underneath the big blue comforter, Jeno’s head nestled in the crook of his boyfriend’s shoulder Jaemin will tell him, “I got us tickets to the Neo Dance Party Festival this year by the way.”

“Really?” Jeno says, admiration in his eyes. “That really brings me back. Wasn’t that the first time we met?”

“Yeah, I thought it would be nice to revisit since our anniversary is coming up.”

“I think that would be wonderful. Are the others coming too?”

Jaemin nods. “Yeah, but this year we’re bringing our own tent. I’m not sleeping in Yangyang’s tent again. The boy could barely put it up.”

Jeno laughs at recalling the memory. “Let’s get a bigger tent this year. I don’t want my feet sticking out.”


Jaemin smiles and leans in for a kiss. Jeno meets him halfway. The reruns of Goblin forgotten as hands meet hair and lips meet jawline. Excitement thrumming in their veins.



2 years ago


Jeno is at a party.

Not a club and definitely not a house party. It’s a big, wide open-spaced gathering out in a field. It’s the loud kind. The type of party that rattles against your eardrums and beats against your cage. Subwoofers off the roof and the bass steady. There’s a crowd of undulating half-naked bodies holding solo-cups, sweat dripping off their bodies dancing to the beat of an electronic dance track looped under the expert fingers of a DJ overseeing them on a large stage.

To his right is his best friend, Donghyuck with his boyfriend Mark dancing side to side, arms locked against each other. Quite frankly, he’s not quite sure why he’s here. This isn’t his kind of scene. At least not with this many people in it but Mark had scored an extra ticket to this festival from a friend, the same friend high up on the DJ’s booth playing a pretty amazing setlist. Fine, he was curious. He’s never been to these kinds of things but Donghyuck is quite a fan and Jeno likes to dance so it’s not too bad.

The tent is hot and he’s feeling thirsty, and he says as much to the both of them before he goes out to get some fresh air. The music is still loud but not as intense. The air smelling of cigarettes and vape smoke. From the dirt-like aftertaste in his mouth he might even hazard weed. Sighing, he walks over to the food tent to order some water, and sits at an empty table taking casual sips to keep himself hydrated.

The music’s leveled up, more intense and head bang-inducing. Jeno’s not in any mood to go join his friends again and relaxes in the empty tables for a few more songs before heading out. By the time he moves the flap to enter the tent again, his view’s blocked by two men. Burly and muscled with sweat sticking on their skin like mildew.

“Can I help you?” Jeno asks, a little bit louder than he’s used to.

“You’re looking pretty alone? Do you wanna hang out with us?” A tan-skinned male with sunglasses perched on his nose asks.

“No thanks, I’m with friends right now.”

“We can be your friends too,” says the other man. His breath smelling like something died in it. Jeno recoils and pushes past them only for a hand to hold against his wrist pulling him back.

“What the fuck?” Jeno says, upset. Eyes narrowing in anger.

“Don’t be like that, baby.”

“I’m not your baby,” Jeno spits out pushing hard against the asshole’s chest. He doesn’t work out for nothing, and the guy moves back.

“No need to get physical,” Sunglasses says. “We just wanna have some fun with a pretty little thing like you.”

The man’s friend is quick to hold him in his embrace. Disgusting,Jeno thinks as he steps on the guy’s foot with his sneakers and pushes hard against him with his shoulder. The drunk man stumbling back. A pissed expression on his face.

“I wouldn’t have to. If you’d just leave me alone.” Jeno says, moving his hands in front of his face. Ready to brawl.

“Well, two against one seems a little unfair now isn’t it?” says an unfamiliar voice behind him. Jeno glances to his side at the newcomer that’s joined their small circle.

“Who the fuck are you?”

“Your average dude trying to enjoy a rave that you’re ruining, asshole,” says the caramel-haired boy with a small grimace. “In case you don’t know, it’s rave. People come here to dance, not pick up people. You mind some help?”

“I don’t really need it but thanks.”

The guy looks him up and down appreciatively, “Looks like it, but I hate assholes like these the most so I’ll stick around.”

“Suit yourself.”

The drunk man rushes against him, but Jeno dodges him easily. Punching him square in the face before following it with a strong uppercut. He doesn’t do boxing for nothing. The man falls back on the floor with a hard thump.

The bleached-blonde guy seems pretty hopeless at brawls but is ferocious in his own way, trying to hold the other guy back. He gets thrown back after a harsh headbutt from Sunglasses. Jeno rushes to help him and knocks him out with a sharp one-two jab to his stomach.

His knuckles feel raw. A quick glance at them show that they’re bruising already. The stranger rubbing his bruised jaw before standing up and punches Sunglasses in the face the moment the man starts to stand up from the ground.

Bitch.Do you know how much I treasure this face?” The stranger spits and looks over at the security guard that’s come to break up the fight. Hands up and pointing at the two drunk bastards on the dirt floor. “They started it. I just defended myself.”

“I saw but you should go to the medical tent and get that treated,” the security guard says before carrying the two inebriated men out of the tent.

Jeno looks at him, really looks at him and underneath the strobe lights, the smoke, the weed that permeates the rave tent he finds that he’s handsome. The kind that’s not so striking at first glance but devastating once he smiles. Charisma oozing off his pores even though he’s got a shiner forming in the underside of his jaw from the headbutt he received earlier. The kind stranger has a shirt covered in glow paint and swimming trunks that fit him rather nicely.

“Thanks for earlier,” Jeno says. “You kind of suck at fighting though.”

The man shrugs. Broad-shouldered and oddly very appealing to him. Jeno can already feel his heartbeat racing and it’s not even because of the music blasting in his ears. “I’m more of a lover than a fighter but damn,” he says with a whistle and appreciative glance, “you were pretty amazing there. I got distracted and ended up getting this,” the stranger points to his chin. 

Jeno extends a hand to him, the stranger accepting it with a firm but friendly shake. Electricity dancing on his skin. “Jaemin,” the other boy says with a dangerous smile.

“Jeno” he replies. Heart in his throat.

“What do you say to grabbing some ice somewhere and chilling out for a bit?”

Jeno glances to his best friends far out, clustered in the throng of people jumping and dancing to the beat, close enough that it’s hard enough to tell them apart, sucking face like no one’s watching. Lost in their own little world in the middle of the dance floor and Jeno decides to fuck it. It’s not like, his night’s been any interesting so far.

He accepts.



Present Day


Jeno likes days like this.

Bags packed and cooler’s all ready for a weekend out partying with his friends. Salt in the air, windows rolled down as he drives along the highway coast. Jaemin’s checking the map, making sure they don’t lose their way. Fingers knotted together over the handbrake. Michael Jackson’s voice is playing on the radio and Donghyuck’s humming to it under his breath. Mark’s cramped in the back next to him. Sleeping off the long journey to nowhere.

“Renjun texted me saying he’s there already with Yangyang and the others,” Hyuck says from the back. Mark continues to snore.

Jeno smiles, the nice kind, the one that hides his eyes a little bit and crinkles at the corner. “How long ‘til we get there, Nana?”

“About an hour,” Jaemin replies. “They can start pitching their tents already.”

“I’ll let them know,” Hyuck says with a smile. Busily typing with one hand while the other cards through his best friend’s hair.

Jeno steals a quick glance to his right, hands gripping the steering wheel tight. Jaemin smiles at him, the sunlight filtering through the window bathes him in a warm glow. Inside his chest, his heart beats faster. “Are you excited?” Jaemin asks with a lazy drawl.

Jeno smiles as he returns his gaze back on the long stretch of road in front of him.

“Yeah, can’t wait.”



They arrive late in the afternoon.

The sun beginning its lengthy descent from the sky as it inches closer and closer to its home in the sea. The entrance to Neo Dance Party was crowded and there was a long line but thankfully they manage to get through it unscathed. The four of them trudging towards the camp site with their tents and their duffel bags.

Renjun waves his hand at them from the distance. A couple of tents already pitched. From the side, Hendery and Yukhei are drinking a couple of cold beers. Yangyang is off to the side, bopping his head to the rhythm of the electronic dance music playing in the background. Loud enough to send the hairs on his forearms upwards in muted excitement.

“We got held up at the gate,” Jaemin says by way of apology. “You mind helping us pitch the tent?”

Renjun snorts and points a finger at Mark and Donghyuck instead. “I think I should help them more. God knows Mark can be a total disaster with assembling things. At least Jeno’s read the instruction manual, at the very least.”

“I did,” Jeno says as he pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose. A bashful expression on his face. “I wanted to make sure I could put it together and pack it all up after all.”

Jaemin wraps a hand around the back of Jeno’s neck, leaning in to give him a kiss. Jeno smiles into it. Jaemin giggles. “There’s my future engineer right here.”

“You’re going to be one too.”

“Software is different from Mechanical, baby,” Jaemin replies as he sets their bags down.

“Gross,” is what Yangyang says before throwing a french fry their way. “Stop reminding us single pretzels how amazing you both are together.”

“There’s no need to be so bitter,” Hendery chides.

Yangyang throws a fry at him too. “You can say that because you managed to score a date with Ten.”

“Well, now we know why you’re so bitter.”

Jaemin laughs as he dodges the succeeding onslaught of the French fry revolution. Hendery, smug asshole that is, takes an Instagram story.  Jeno thinks his boyfriend’s laugh is the most beautiful sound in the world.




Dressing up for a rave is weird, Jeno thinks.

He’s been to a few and even still he doesn’t quite understand the dress code. There are people like Donghyuck and Yangyang who go out of their way to do their make-up and wear costumes. Yukhei’s the kind of guy who wears beach shorts and war paints his face in neon-glow in the dark. Jeno’s not very fashionable but he’s worn his loosest muscle shirt, the ones that show off his guns rather nicely and some shorts. Mark joins him in this endeavor. At least they can both be boring together.

“You look like one of those frat boys who try to longboard,” Renjun says, blowing out a puff of smoke from between his lips. It smells a lot like weed. It probably is. “It’s supposed to look douche-y but on you it oddly fits.”

“Thank you?”

“Well, I like this view a lot,” Jaemin says coming up to him and laying a hand on his stomach. An appreciative look on his face. “It shows off your amazing legs, babe.”

Jeno shies away. Cheeks feeling hot. Jaemin laughs and wraps an arm around his waist, nuzzling into the crown of his hair. Breathing him in.

“Which stage do you want to go to first?” Mark asks. Tousling his hair before keeping it slick with his snapback. “The side stage or the main stage?”

“Main stage!” Donghyuck says with a smile. “I heard the setlist is going to be amazing.”

Yukhei sidles up next to him, a rather relaxed expression on his face. “Want any?”

Jeno peers down and sees two baggies in Yukhei’s hands. He knows his friends like to take MDMAs whenever they go out to places like this. It’s a given. It’s practically free anyways but he knows them too.

He’s tried it, once.

Felt the rush of endorphins in his system as his body goes into hyperdrive. Everything turned up to a hundred. The sound. The heat. The smell. His skin, extra sensitive to every single thing. The joy he felt from dancing his heart out and just letting himself go. Losing himself in the music and the arms of the boy he loves, dancing next to him. The strobe lights blinking streaks into his vision, twinkling like an artificial star and Jeno’s lost in it.

Jeno shakes his head, an apologetic smile on his face. “Not today, Yukhei.”

“You know we’ve got your back, right?”

“I know, but I don’t think I should take anything hard this weekend. Finals have been really shitty for me recently.”

“I can respect that,” Yukhei says as he passes the bag to Donghyuck who smiles at him before popping one in his mouth. Jeno’s sure Mark will offer him a spliff later to mellow him out from crashing too hard.

“You want any?”

Jaemin shakes his head. “Nah, I just want a more chill high today. Besides, do you have those brownies your roommate makes?”

“Fat Kun?”

“You shouldn’t call him that,” Renjun reprimands but Hendery and Yangyang laugh out loud.

“Yeah, I do. Give me a sec.” Yukhei says before rummaging in his tent. Jeno looks at his boyfriend, handsome and broad shouldered in his acid-rainbow wife-beater and board shorts. “I’m not going to stop you, if you wanted to take an MDMA you know.”

Jaemin shrugs. “Yeah, but I wanna have a lot of fun later and I’m no good if I crash out too hard.”

“Bold of you to assume things so early in the evening,” Jeno says with a raised brow.

“What can I say, I hope I can be a convincing date,” Jaemin says in a slow murmur. Jeno shivers, excitement pooling in his gut. Oh, he knows that alright. He’s never needed much convincing when Na Jaemin is involved.

In the distance, the music calls out to them, inviting them to join the rest of the worshipers of the dead night.  




The first set they go to has a pretty large crowd amassing.

It’s in the biggest tent where one of those hot-shot DJs everyone loves and hears on the radio. Jeno knows him as Mark’s ex-roommate in university. Johnny Seo. He’s up there in the stage throwing cake at everybody. The people screaming in delight as the music’s amazing bass drops. There’s smoke and wild lights and a random man offering a can of neon-glow paint to anyone who wants a try at being fucking Picasso.

“This is some crazy PR shit,” Donghyuck says to Mark. They all laugh as a stray piece of frosting catches on his face. Jeno’s always known that Donghyuck screams like a girl but to hear it again in person, is a new awakening.

Mark just laughs and wipes the frosting out of his face with a bare thumb. “Well, his song is literally called, Cake face, and hey, it’s pretty good.”

“Me or the cake?”

“Enough flirting, I want to dance,” Yangyang says as he moves past everyone and initiates a cypher. Popping and locking with smooth movement before challenging Hendery to showdown. The dark-haired man smiling as he krumps down with force. Faux anger bleeding through their movements. Renjun laughs so hard his cola spills over his solo cup, drawing out a curse. Yukhei laughing at his misfortune in the background.

“Shouldn’t we start dancing?” Jaemin says, swaying side to side to the beat of the snare drum.

Jeno nods, head already bopping to the music.

The music changes to something even more hard-hitting and Jeno can’t fight the urge within him to start jumping in time to the beat. The rest of his friends joining with him as they join the same throng of rave-goers, dancing to the music orchestrated by a DJ above. The rise and fall, the repeating patterns, the melodic conclusion.

It’s hot, and he’s sweaty and his shirt is already soaked through but here, in a makeshift circle of their friends dancing and jumping over and over, his skin going into overdrive, the touch feels good. Grounding him even though every single part of him seems to be floating away.

They’re lounging outside their tents in a circle, passing a spliff Mark rolls out for the occasion. Everyone’s taking a break from the dancing. It’s only half past eleven and Donghyuck plans to go back to the main stage and dance some more.

Yukhei’s broken open some chips for everyone to eat. Fitting, because Jeno’s getting the munchies and he’s really hungry.

Jaemin laughs as he offers Jeno another chip. The dark-haired boy eating it greedily. Absent-mindedly, Jaemin’s running his hands on Jeno’s leg as he listens to Donghyuck’s exciting tales. Yangyang and Hendery snickering in the background.

Jeno eats another couple of brownies. They’re pretty good. Sweet but not sickeningly sweet with chocolate fudge in the middle. He hopes Jaemin could learn how to make it soon.

He likes gatherings like this, away from the deafening thrum of a bass and the dim lighting. This is Jeno’s favorite part of a rave. Being able to hang out with people he cares about and likes the same things he does. Being able to do things Jaemin loves, alongside him.

Jeno thinks he’s lucky.

Lucky that he’s able to meet a guy like Jaemin in a world filled with so many terrible people. Lucky that at the end of the day, it’s him that Jaemin returns to at night and holds in his arms in the morning. Lucky, that he’s the person a guy, like Jaemin loves. He’s not the best or the most articulate boyfriend. His jokes aren’t funny but Jaemin still laughs at them anyway. At times he can be stubborn, and unbending and insensitive but Jaemin is patient enough to tell him right from wrong and Jeno hopes that one day he can show him that. Show him how much he loves him back, even though his mouth refuses to utter the words out loud.




If people were to judge him by his appearance, Jeno Lee definitely does not seem or look like the type to enjoy wild parties that extended deep into the night. Truthfully, he isn’t but his boyfriend does and he likes to see him happy.

Jaemin’s always the most beautiful when he’s free. Dancing underneath the artificial strobe lights, a lithe body body-rolling to the beat of a dropping bass. A wide smile on his face as he whips his head back and forth, a body made out of sand, smooth like a snake and dark eyes that draws him in. He’s magnetic like this, and Jeno’s his unsuspecting but all too willing victim.

Jaemin snakes a hand over his shoulder, pulling him in. A dangerous smile on his face. “Spaced out already?” Jaemin whispers against his ears. “I told you, you shouldn’t have eaten three brownies; you know the ones Yukhei’s frat brother makes packs a mean wallop.” It sends electricity down his spine.

“No, just happy,” Jeno replies, wrapping his arms around Jaemin’s waist. “I’m glad we met and we’re here together.”

There’s a soft expression on Jaemin’s face. Open and vulnerable, and full of love. Jaemin leans in to kiss him. Softly at first. Their lips pressing against each other before breaking apart, breathing in the same air.  Swaying to the beat of a more melancholic song. Foreheads touching, close enough that Jaemin’s eyelashes brush against his cheek as his boyfriend mouths kisses alongside the dip of his cheekbone and the bridge of his nose. Jeno exhales sharply, shuddering from the contact. The booming bass rattling his ribcage to match the pounding beat of his heart thundering against his chest.

Maybe Jaemin’s right.

Maybe it’s the weed, or the light or the fact that Jaemin’s hands are a cage, lit aflame and Jeno is a candle wick, ready to be burned. Every sense is heightened, and everything reminds him of Jaemin. His cologne, his gentle touch, his low slow cadence as it wraps around his vowels, the way his body feels pressed against him—it’s all too much, but Jeno doesn’t want to pull away.

So, when Jeno crashes his lips against Jaemin’s again for the second time, he can barely restrain himself. His hands are just as greedy as his mouth and they roam around his body like a blind man, trying to see. Jaemin’s kisses taste like the chocolate croissant he ate and the ginger ale he downed before they entered the main tent to dance to their heart’s content. He can’t help but chase after it more.

Until he sinks into him completely, until he’s satisfied, until he’s drowning.




In the end, Jaemin was right about bringing the four-person tent.

It’s not easy to fit inside such a tight space but they manage anyways. Jaemin’s lying down on their sleeping bags, placed side by side for extra room. A comforter over them. The air is hot and humid but it doesn’t deter them from pressing against each other. Hands roaming the expanse of each other’s bare skin, the cords of muscle from spending too much time in the gym. Jaemin smiles at Jeno’s desperation, quickly pulling his shirt off and dropping it somewhere inside the tent. The older boy crawling into Jaemin’s lap to pull him headfirst into a dirty kiss. All tongue, and little technique but Jaemin’s always liked it a little bit wet.

“Well, you’re eager,” Jaemin says out of breath as Jeno pulls his shirt off. “You don’t have to rush. We’ve got all the time in the world right now.”

Jeno stops, embarrassed as he buries his face in Jaemin’s chest. “Sorry, I’m just really, really horny right now.

“I know, it’s why I said you should relax on eating so many brownies,” Jaemin chastises as he pulls Jeno down with him on the sleeping bag. Leaving slow, lazy kisses on the tip of his nose and the sharp angle of his jaw. His hand slowly inching inside Jeno’s shorts to fondle at his length. Jeno moans in his ear. A sharp kind of gasp, that descends into melted honey. The kind that a boy with Jaemin’s level of addiction to sugar craves to devour the most. “Let’s go slow, yeah?”

Jeno nods as he lets his boyfriend pin him down on the sleeping bag. Closes his eyes, when he feels the tell-tale fabric of his shorts and boxer briefs slip off his legs and the burning feeling of Jaemin’s tongue as he holds him firmly in hand, licking a stripe on the underside of his cock before swallowing him hole. Jeno’s the one with the oral fixation in this relationship but damn, if Jaemin doesn’t know what to do with his mouth. His body is on fire and every single press of Jaemin’s tongue against his dick feels like a wall of flame, his hands on his hips are a brand. There’s a coal in Jeno’s stomach that’s burning him from the inside out.

The chaotic mess of the music isn’t helping the war of emotion inside of him. His thighs tensing as Jaemin takes him deeper into his mouth and Jeno’s clutching at the comforter to keep himself from coming too soon. His chest heaving as he struggles to keep his breathing even though his boyfriend seems determined to suck his soul out through his dick. The moan that Jaemin draws from his throat is long, and primal. The kind that has Jeno gripping his boyfriend’s dark hair tightly when he feels the tell-tale brush of his fingers against his entrance. Breath stuttering out. The younger male looking up at him from his long lashes, a predator having caught his prey. A smug expression on his face.

“Jaemin, don’t tease. I don’t. I can’t hold out very long,” Jeno chastises him, leaning up on his forearms. Jaemin reaches up to give him a lingering kiss. Jeno can taste himself already. Bitter but also slightly sweet. He hands Jaemin the tiny bottle of lube they’ve packed before he asks the next question, he knows he’ll ask.

“Do you want me to top or bottom tonight?”

“You top, tonight. I’m too buzzed right now and I just…Nana you know, how I am. I just want to relax tonight, fuck it out of me, yeah?

“We have to work on more healthy stress coping mechanisms.”

“Yeah well, I don’t hear you complaining.”

Jaemin pushes his hair out of his face, before leaning to kiss him. Open-mouthed and dirty. Sucking his tongue and biting his lip hard enough that it starts to bleed. Jeno pulls at his hair hard in vengeance, drawing out a long moan from his boyfriend. “How do you want me to take you tonight?” Jaemin whispers against his lips. Hard-on pressing against Jeno’s ass, like a faithful reminder. A promise of what’s to come.

“Like this,” Jeno whispers back as he grinds his hips against his boyfriend’s boner. Pulling out yet another moan from his lover’s lips. “Take me like this.”

“Okay,” Jaemin says.

Okay,” Jeno echoes back. Smiling as he leans back down on their makeshift bed. Jaemin’s dark gaze pinning him down on the bed, legs parted like a fruit ready for harvest.

 “Feel good?” Jaemin asks as he scissors his fingers in Jeno’s hole. The lube squelching against muscle and Jeno just nods. Eyes shut as he lets his boyfriend have his way with him. Shudders when Jaemin presses against his prostate over and over, mouthing over his dick with the other. Gasps, when Jaemin pushes another finger in, and its tight and his skin is on fire and he’s burning but Jeno loves it. Relishes the feeling of drowning in Jaemin’s embrace, like he’s nothing and everything to him. When Jaemin’s fingers pull away, Jeno sits up, mile-long legs wrapped around his boyfriend’s waist. “Where’s the condom?” He asks breathlessly, peppering his lips with butterfly kisses that has Jaemin nipping at his lower lip yet again. It stings, but Jeno’s always been a little kinky.

“Well, if you can’t see it then—”

“Oh my god, Nana, you did not just buy a glow in the dark condom. I’m not having sex with you now. This has been a mistake.”

Jaemin shuts him up with a kiss, smiling into it as he rummages in the bag next to the sleeping bag for a box of condoms. “Relax, babe, it’s the usual one. You know I’m usually all for themes but that one’s pretty extreme.”

“Good,” Jeno says as he continues to leave kisses on Jaemin’s neck. Mouthing and nipping at his Adam’s apple. “Give it to me.”

With practiced ease, Jeno rips off the packet and rolls it onto Jaemin’s dick, before pouring copious amounts of lube in. Feeling the heat and press of Jaemin’s hard on against his hand as he squeezes it, running his thumb up the length before pressing down against the tip. Jaemin hissing as he pulls him on his lap. Jeno smiles before he sinks greedily down onto Jaemin’s length. Inching down slowly, as he feels himself opening up. Jaemin’s hands on his waist tight enough to leave bruises, guiding him down until he’s bottomed out completely.

They stay like this, for a while, breathing each other in as Jeno draws figure eights with his hips. Draws moans with his lips, hands threading through Jaemin’s sweaty hair. With his hands anchored on broad-shoulders, he brings his hips up and down slowly. To the slow rhythm of the music outside. His lover kissing the bare expanse of his collarbones. Jeno’s thigh’s squeezing as his boyfriend starts to piston his hips upwards to match him. Digging deeper into him. Building up a slow, steady rhythm between their bodies and satisfied sighs of pleasure.

Once upon a time, he would have been embarrassed at how loud he could get but now, he doesn’t really mind. Not when, he knows Jaemin likes having everyone else knowing what they did behind closed doors. When Jaemin gets to show him off, and Jeno gets to remind everyone that he’s Jaemin’s and Jaemin is his.

So when, Jaemin hit’s that spot inside him, the kind that makes his eyes go white and vision blurry, he can’t help the loud shout of ecstasy that unfurls from his mouth. And Jaemin, is nothing but tenacious, angling his hips so he hits his prostate every time. Jeno’s legs are made of jelly at this point and when Jaemin pushes him down the sleeping bag, he doesn’t struggle. Parts his legs wider, wrapping them firmly around his boyfriend’s waist as he pistons his hips inside him.

At this point, Jaemin knows him so well. Knows that Jeno loves excruciatingly slow sex when he’s high and the long drawn out orgasms he can pull one after the other if Jeno’s feeling particularly pent up. He’s slow and deliberate, winding him up with every slap of their bodies, and every kiss they share. Jeno’s nails digging lightning streaks into his back before Jaemin pins his arms down to the side before leaning down to leave dirty kisses against his earlobes. “Naughty, naughty.”

“Faster, go faster,” Jeno whispers back.

Jaemin hoists him higher, the change in altitude makes them both gasp in surprise before dissolving into fits of giggles. Jaemin rocking his hips into him faster, harder, with more force than before. Jeno meeting him upwards with every thrust, Jaemin’s hand stroking his dick in time. The both of them chasing after their own pleasure at this point. Whispering banalities in the air as they call each other by their names. Winding up for the climax. A fever pitch in the air.

Jeno comes first. A shower of white against his abdomen. Jaemin groans as he feels Jeno squeezing him inside, thrusting over and over again until he comes too. A groan escaping his lips as he empties himself out inside. Jeno pulling him into a deep kiss. They stay like this for a while. Tangled up in each other as they bask in the afterglow. Jeno carding through Jaemin’s hair slowly, drawing out patterns in his wake.

“I should get us cleaned up now,” Jaemin says, out of breath. Jeno hums in agreement.

“I feel slightly gross now.”

“Sorry to ask but did you pack any—”

“I think I packed the baby wipes in my bag.”

Baby wipes?

Jeno slaps his arm hard. “Shut up, you know my skin is sensitive.”

“I know, I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m just messing with you, babe.” Jaemin apologizes with a small peck on his lips before pulling out and tying the condom. Depositing it neatly outside in their designated trash bag. It’s something he loves about him, Jeno realizes. Jaemin Na, boyfriend, sex-bomb, humanitarian who cares about his environment and disposes trash properly. A modern-day hero.

Jaemin returns shortly and wipes the mess of his boyfriend’s abdomen clean. Jeno helping Jaemin clean up too, washing his boyfriend’s forehead and body with as much care. It’s the closest thing they’re both going to get to a shower in this place and their room already stinks like sex, the both of them don’t have to be too.

“We’re gonna have to air out the tent,” Jaemin says with a yawn as he hands Jeno a clean pair of boxers on before wearing his own.

“I think I brought fabric spray too,” Jeno says as he rummages in his bag for the bottle. The exhaustion seeping into his bones quickly like a cold spring.

“Aren’t you prepared?”

“Well, when you have a boyfriend with an exhibitionist kink, it pays to be one. I didn’t hear you complain that one time we did it in your car during Christmas with your parents.”

“Ah, lavender and tonka. It’s never been the same since.”

Jeno tosses him the bottle in embarrassment before covering up underneath the blankets. He smells it in the air soon enough. It relaxes him enough to draw out a long yawn. Jaemin scoots over underneath the blankets soon enough. A tired smile on his face. A tiny galaxy twinkling in his eyes despite the darkness.

“I love you,” Jeno says. He doesn’t say it often, but he does. He loves him. He loves this man with his whole heart.

Jaemin leans in to kiss him tenderly. “I love you too, Jeno.”

They talk themselves into slumber. Long limbs tangled in a heap under the covers in a prayer of worship to the moon.




Jeno wakes up to the sound of Renjun’s shouts of indignation outside.

He’s alone in the sleeping bed, the indent next to him still warm, meaning Jaemin hadn’t vacated it too long. He sits up, rubbing his eyes and cursing at the soreness of his backside. They probably got too intense again last night. Not that Jeno minds. He’s rummaging inside their tent, looking for his glasses when the door unzips. Jeno covering himself up more with the blanket, ready to tear the visitor a new one asshole when a familiar mop of hair peeks at him.

“Calm down, babe. It’s just me. I’ve made you breakfast so don’t be upset at me for leaving you alone,” Jaemin says in a low voice. Scratchy and a little bit deeper than usual.

“Have you seen my glasses?” he says by way of an apology. Jaemin smiles as he hands them to him with a flourish.

“Cleaned them up myself, too.”

Jeno puts them on and swerves when Jaemin leans in for a kiss.

“Morning breath.”

“Yikes.” Jaemin says before kissing him anyways. He keeps his mouth shut, but returns it easily.

“Let me just brush my teeth first,” Jeno says as he grabs his toiletries and exits the tent.

The first thing he’s greeted to is a great burst of sunlight a swathe of blue sky. Not a cloud in sight. Already, Jeno knows it’s going to be a hot day not that he minds. He makes his way to the back of their tents with a bottle of water to freshen up. Mark joining him shortly, red in his eyes and a goofy smile. Jeno offers one back.

By the time he heads back to their main hang-out circle, Donghyuck’s got a shit-eating grin waiting for him as Jaemin hands out plates of food for everyone.

“Now, I know why both of you slipped out early,” Yukhei says with a whistle. “Jaemin, my dude, you mauled him like an animal.”

“Not that far from the truth,” Renjun supplies cheekily from behind his coffee mug. “You think that’s impressive, Jeno’s a biter. I can only imagine the kind of war wounds Jaemin’s hiding under his shirt.”

“Doesn’t matter, I like them anyway.” Jaemin says with a proud puff of his chest.

“Kinky motherfuckers,” Yangyang says with a smile. “Sit down Jeno, you must be hungry after last night.”

Jeno just shrugs it off with an embarrassed smile as he sits next to his boyfriend. Jaemin offering him a slice of bibimbap. Humming in contentment as he appreciates the amazing flavor of his boyfriend’s cooking. The smell of coffee is starting to wake him up too.

“Good morning, babe.” Jaemin whispers against his ears. Jeno smiles. The nice kind that makes his eyes curve upwards into half-moons, wrinkles in full display. The one he’s pretty sure Jaemin loves the most. The one that made him fall madly in love with him, that first meeting at the rave two years ago.

“Happy anniversary,” Jeno says instead with a kiss on the lips. This one tastes like a promise. The kind of promise Jeno makes to himself every day to love this man like his last and take care of him for as long as Jaemin would let him. He’s never been the kind who opens his heart easily but he knows that he would give it to Jaemin every time he asks.

“Ready to start a new day?” Jaemin asks him, sunshine blazing through his smile.

Jeno can only answer with a promise of forever in his half-moon eyes.