All I ever wanted was to see you smiling. All I ever wanted was you and me.
First thing ever certainly was to come back to the start of it all.
It had started with rain. Not only rain, there were merely drops anyway. Until then, the weather had been clear, the sky was of a deep blue and the sun shining to the point one would blind themselves by gazing at it. That was quite boring, considering it.
Crawl-y hated the weather. Well, his snake condition pushed him to stay out of any shadow from the Garden, his blood cold. Still, he hated it. That was more annoying than Hell on some points – wait, thinking back, it was as annoying as Hell. Still the same, linear, and unmoving thing.
He had trouble understanding that, as he had a glimpse of his former life, when he was part of the angels creating the universe. They were not mere stars; galaxies, planets, meteors, stardust… He missed it so much. He gazed at the sky, which had turned out cloudy, stormy, and threatening. No stars then. He sighed, a deep and full of emotions type of sigh he did not know he was holding for so long, as he felt a tad better.
Then, the rain started to pour every single being down here; until he felt no more. He frowned and looked around to find that some sort of miracle – rain is wet by definition.
A white wing was protecting him from the first storm of mankind.
Aziraphale had not moved from their little chat, contemplating the outer side of the Garden, from where they both were standing. He was watching the deep horizon, as if not conscious of his action. As if it had been pure instinct.
Crawl-y felt a urge to let him away, to chase him, to snarl at his so perfect face; as to counteract the fact he only was devoured by misery and self-hatred for who he had turned to be.
Since the Fall, he had continuously resented the damn world, God Herself, the angels, Satan, everyone he could remember of. Since the Fall, he felt ugly, dirty, unworthy of anything.
Not that he would never be ashamed to tempt Eve with the Fruit of Knowledge – because, if all aspects considered, why Humans could not be aware of anything, like placid God’s creatures? Why would they not question their condition and environment? Oh, yes, asking questions is dangerous, he thought bitterly.
So he could not understand the Principality Aziraphale who was kind and mindless about him. Okay, he was a damn angel: angels are naturally kind; still, he was the only one neither fearing him nor hating him straightforwardly. If Crawl-y went to cross the path of other angels, they quickly acted belligerent to him – and Crawl-y made everything he could not to meet any of them. He despised them too.
Aziraphale waited the rain to stop. He had remained silent the whole time, and Crawl-y finally managed to control his impulse to reject that presence as he soon sensed some peace within himself being alongside that angel.
Since when had he not felt that way?
Next to the storm went the night. His eyes were searching what he craved to contemplate every night: the stars were shining, as beautiful as ever. Since the cosmos. His gaze fell up to Alpha Centauri like he were an automaton.
They parted their respective ways and acted as if nothing of the sort had been existed. Crawl-y went back to his serpent form and slithered to a hidden place to “lick” his hurt feelings.
There was something Crawl-y hated amongst anything else (this list would be revised through time): the blind murder of children.
From his hidden way of life, he had observed Adam and Eve’s descendents grow up, and he had become fond of children. He sometimes risked his position mixing up with them in his human form, only to play with them. He loved embodying the bad guy role and jokingly frightening them, running after them, whilst they were running for a fake safety place and laughing and giggling.
The very first murder he had heard of (fortunately to him, he neither witnessed it nor tempted anyone involved) was of Abel’s. He and Cain were grown-up; yet, to Crawl-y’s perspective they were like children to him.
Still the worse was up to occur.
Crawl-y was enjoying a sun bath, whilst hating the sun and that damn wonderful good weather, his scales slithering slowly on the sand; when reverberating and repetitive sounds reached him. He disliked that. It even distressed him, as those sounds were from stressed animals. He knew them quite well, socializing with them as a snake. He could sense every hoof, every paw, every slither on the ground and reverberate to him.
Then reached him the sound and babbling of human noises. Crawl-y had had enough. In addition, his primal instinct sensed that something was wrong.
He slithered as fast as he could to the origin of this trouble.
Human beings were packed before a massive and gigantic boat, one Crawl-y could not possibly imagine, and he had an excellent imagination running in his head. Animals were marching by pairs on a mere plank that joined the ground to the boat. The humans were watching and commenting the whole affair.
Crawl-y had made it quick to transform. Lately, he had been at ease with what was considered as female clothing. Certainly a period in his ethereal and agender life. He did not care about the stares and muttering.
A bright white spot attracted both attention and eyes.
Nah. That was pure and damn luck.
He went to the white spot as silently as possible, slithering between people like a snake, and tapped the shoulder. He quickly went to Aziraphale’s left side as if he was not the author of that poke.
Aziraphale’s face lit up as soon as he recognized Crawl-y – damn this angel who made nothing to simplify their enmity. Nonetheless, Crawl-y got rid of his bitter thoughts as snow could melt under the sun. How could he hold a grudge to that angel?
Having no clue to what was going on; Crawl-y simply asked the only other ethereal being in the area, who willingly answered to him.
‘Not the kids! You can’t kill kids!’ Crawl-y cut in, his anger burst in a second, disgusted. The ineffable Plan – buggers.
If it had been possible to have a tad faith in God’s ineffability to do things properly and with some sense, Crawl-y lost it on that Flood Day.
The aftermath of the Flood had been tragic and painful.
Aziraphale could feel the demon’s distress; so that he decided to stay a bit more in the area – and wondered later if it had been wise of him, as he soon discovered the bitter taste of remorse.
The Earth was virgin of the majority of its population.
And Crawl-y was crying, huge tears crashing down the sand, his bare hands bleeding from clutching, his body trembling with grief. The children… The day before, he still was playing with them and they… were gone.
Aziraphale approached carefully, knowing that was like approaching a hurt animal, a snake on it all. He gently crouched besides the demon and patted his shoulder as a comforting gesture.
Crawl-y’s eyes widened and he rejected that damn pure hand from him, with an ample arch of his arm, hoping he had hurt Aziraphale even a little in the process.
‘Damn you and the ineffable Plan!’
‘Crawl-y…’ the angel tried, stuttering, torn between uneasiness and shame, ‘Please, Crawl-y, let me…’
‘Go away! GO AWAY!’ Crawl-y roared, his eyes mad, his wild hair dancing around his face through the after storm wind.
Something in his voice surely hit a sensitive point in Aziraphale who stood up and slowly stepped backwards, his face contorted with doubt and sadness.
Crawl-y smelt sorrow and wrath. Betrayal was piercing every part of his soul.
Aziraphale finally turned his heels and went away.
‘Go away… from me…’ Crawl-y’s trembling lips let escape, tears still running down his angular face.
(up to come)