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Training Ground Zero

Chapter Text

As of late, Kakashi’s worst fears didn’t manifest in his dreams or in the quiet moments of his daily visitations to the memorial stone. Rather, it came in the form of emotionally blackmailed guard duty to his late teacher’s infant son who was a near literal demon to babysit. So much that if his faith in Minato-sensei’s seals weren’t sky high, he would’ve thought that the demon fox must’ve slipped through somehow.

Kakashi could even put it in 10 words or less. Uzumaki Naruto was nothing like his parents.

See? 7 words. Now, wasn’t that a lucky number. 

The… the hellspawn - mere baby, only months in age at this point, was terrifying in his anger. And for what, Kakashi wasn’t at all curious to find out. He’d rather stay comfortable in the seat of dealing with the already fitful Naruto because anything more sounded like it took too much effort and emotional energy. 

Furthermore, if he hadn’t known better, Kakashi would’ve suspected the ugly, ugly tantrums to have stemmed from the fact that the baby understood that he was a baby. Naruto had a set of lungs on him. Ones that could last for hours and hours and hours, uncaring of the time of day. He wasn’t even doing a proper wail. It was pure unadulterated screams of rage.

The pieces weren’t ones that Kakashi could click into place; because perhaps the screaming alone he could deal with, but the pure silence that followed for days felt far more creepier than his cute kouhai’s emotionless eyes.

Childcare may not have been the apprenticeship the silver-haired ninja had taken - not so much as everything murder under the sky anyway - but the thing was, even Kakashi knew that self awareness couldn’t possibly occur so early. Brain development would still be incomplete, the cranium soft enough he could crush it easily under one hand.

What was it? And just where was the logic? Ninjas defied realities and Fate herself all the time but not even prodigies like him knew that Kakashi was called Kakashi until he turned 4 months old. Naruto was 2 and a half. 

Kakashi wanted to stab someone when he witnessed Naruto’s first fully opened eyes too. They were an achingly familiar blue at first, and the tingling compulsion was aimed at himself (Useless, powerless, heartless Kakashi. Couldn’t save anyone- ). Then they flashed fucking red and Kakashi wanted to slash a Kunai over his and the Third Hokage’s throat for making him see things he could not unsee.