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Don't Pay It Much Mind

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Soma Cruz was often troubled.

Which was probably a very common side-effect of being the reincarnation of who might've been the most troubled man in existence, harboring nearly a thousand years of anger.

Sometimes it got to be too much, and for a young man who was near to turning twenty-one, that was very much a problem. He was going to attempt suicide, and like anyone who still wanted to live and be loved but was too afraid, he reached-out before doing so...
To Mina Hakuba, his best friend and possible love interest (who really knew? I wasn't bothered to care.) 

She was understandably worried, and given that Alucard and I were in Japan at the time for an annual check-up on the area, she called us both on the brink of tears and we went right into a search of the whole city. I was the one who ended-up finding him. It was overcast and getting dark, but it wasn't too hard to spot him on the roof of a worn, old hotel. 

As few people as there were outside, I didn't want to draw attention to myself, so I just went into the hotel as calmly as I could and once I was in the stairwell, I practically flew up the steps. I made it to the roof without much trouble, and I saw Soma's body jolt with surprise when the heavy door closed behind me. I don't think he realised it was me that had walked into the hotel just a moment ago, my outfit wasn't exactly the most notable, right now.

My hands were in my pockets, the chill from the wind was more prominent up here. I walked towards the young man, and his eyes were trained on me the whole time. He made no move to climb up over the ledge, which was a good sign, so I didn't need to hurry towards him. Neither of us said anything until I was leaning against the ledge close beside him, arms crossed over it. I looked out at the city, so dreary in weather like this, then I turned my attention to the young man who was now staring very intensely at the ground far below us.

I knew he wouldn't jump, but when I asked him why he hadn't already, he just struggled to say anything before quietly saying he didn't want anyone to have to see his body. 

Then he started to cry. 

That was my cue, I guessed. Not that it would have taken much convincing to get me to be more comforting. I was jaded, not a monster. I sighed and wrapped my arm around his shoulder. As soon as I did that, he started shivering like he'd suddenly become aware of how long he'd been outside. I gave him a little squeeze, rubbing his arm. He didn't do anything but try to contain his sobbing as his tears fell to the sidewalk below us. 

I quickly fired-off a text to Mina and Alucard to say that I'd found Soma and that he was alright, then I put my phone away. He knew who I'd texted, and sunk-into himself more. The human part of him was glad to be found, though. No... not even. It was the young part of him. The part that knew he could have a future and love people and see new things.

We were gone before long, walking back down the stairs close together. He was exhausted, and I didn't blame him. 

Once we got to the lobby floor, the man at the front desk realised what was happening immediately, and looked a little shocked. He said goodbye to the both of us, and told us to have a good evening (or that's what I'd gathered from my limited knowledge of Japanese, at least.) I skipped the pleasantries, just grumbling something halfheartedly back at him before leaving the building. The car I'd rented was a short walk from the parking lot, but the time to talk was beneficial.

I told Soma I couldn't leave him alone tonight. He nodded his head, understanding easily. When I asked him if he wanted to stay with Mina, he tensed. It took some coaxing, but he eventually told me he wanted to speak to her when he was feeling better, and that he knew she'd be worrying over him and that he just wanted a little time away. I said "alright" and asked if he wanted to stay with 'Arikado'. He declined by shaking his head and I couldn't blame him. He didn't know the guy like I did... and even with the knowledge I had, I questioned if staying the night with Alucard would be much more than hanging-out in some empty apartment. 

Also, Alucard liked his privacy. He wouldn't have refused Soma if I'd asked him to take him in, but all-around, we decided it was for the best to let him be. He could speak with Soma in the morning. 

Which left one last person Soma was familiar with that could look after him. I asked the guy if he'd be alright coming back to my hotel room, and after some hesitation, he gave-in. 

Just in time, too, as we'd already been back at the car. 

We picked-up food on the way back. Not too much, but we were both hungry. He ended-up eating most of his meal in the car, everything that wouldn't make a mess, and we finished-off the rest of it once we'd hung-up our coats in the room.

I put on the television for Soma while I went to shower, but he ended-up just scrolling through his phone. To be fair, I usually did the same thing. The TV was just background noise to keep him from feeling lonely.

Normally I showered in the mornings, but I figured Soma would want to be alone for a bit and I was confident he wouldn't try leaving the room to go make himself cozy on the roof. 

Once I was cleaned to my liking (I have fairly-high standards for how pretty I want to look when I get into bed,) I came out in a housecoat to find Soma nestled with his face against the pillows passed-out. It was pretty sweet. It was only then, though, that I really noticed the one bed in the room that he was currently sprawled-out on. I went to the side of the bed and tapped his hand a few times. If he didn't wake up, I'd just settle for sleeping in the chair, or something. 

Thankfully, it didn't come to that. He wasn't sleeping very deeply, and after the first touch to his hand he blinked and stirred with a little questioning 'mm?'

I pointed-out the one bed situation and offered to call for a cot to be brought in for him, but he just quietly moved to one side of the bed, staring at the pillows and avoiding my gaze. He just muttered that he'd be fine sleeping in the same bed as me so long as I was also alright with that, and it wasn't that much of a problem that I'd try to argue, so I just shrugged off my housecoat and slipped-into my side of the bed. Thankfully, it was sizable, we wouldn't need to be uncomfortably-close or anything. 

It took me a bit longer to drift-off than I thought it would. I ended-up just scrolling through my phone with my glasses on for an hour or so, and Soma's back was to me, so I couldn't see if he was doing the same. Once I finally turned the lamp next to the bed off, though, I didn't see any light from his side of the bed, so I just assumed he'd been asleep.

I took my glasses off and laid my phone beside me on the table, moving a pillow under my head to the side so I could shuffle down and sleep better. My mind was still awake, but with the soft blanket and the clean pillows, I knew I'd be totally relaxed soon-enough. 

I was in the process of falling asleep, eyes closed and breathing getting deeper, when I heard Soma shift. It wouldn't have been so noticeable if he didn't turn to face me and push himself a little closer. Just enough so there was still half a foot between us. 

He whispered my name, and I groaned in response, opening my eyes a moment after. His face was in front of mine, but he was looking at the pillows below his head again, sad and thoughtful. He hesitated before he asked if he could hug me, and I ended-up pulling him into a loose hold and he tucked his head under my chin. His arm slung over my waist after another moment, and we fell into silence again. 

I normally slept bare, or only with underwear on as I was doing so tonight. Soma slept in pajamas. I couldn't blame him, they looked quite comfortable, it was just a different feeling for me... on top of basically cuddling someone in bed, too.

I shut my eyes and attempted to go back to bed, but I couldn't relax fully. With the way his breathing was, he wasn't trying to sleep. I chalked that up to him being a little nervous... or maybe the darkness was making it easier for him to think about what he was sad about, and that he'd start crying. 

Instead, he pressed closer to me, and I felt his hand on my chest. He ran his fingers gently through the hair there, then trailed his hand down my front and to my hip. I don't know why I didn't say anything. 

He gave my chest and waist some more attention, alternating between rubbing the skin softly to grabbing greedily but gently. 

At some point, he must've gotten more bold, pressing his face into my neck and trailing his hand slowly down my stomach until his fingers met the waistband of my boxer briefs. They dipped-under just barely, and I grunted out a quiet "Soma," before he could get any further. I heard his breathing hitch and felt his fingers try to discreetly leave the waistband only to rest atop it, then he brought his hand away slowly altogether like if he moved slowly-enough I wouldn't be able to notice. 

"Get some sleep," I told him, and he just nodded his head after staying still for a second. 

Before too long, he'd put some space between our bodies, but was still content with my arm around him. The both of us had our eyes closed, then, trying to sleep, but it took some time. I only managed to pass-out when I was sure Soma had, first.

I should've stopped him earlier, but he got the point.

I can't pay that night much mind because I know his mind wasn't in the right place. He's young and upset, any sexual favours he would have granted me he'd eventually come to regret. The next day, I acted like nothing had happened, and he was more than happy to do the same. 

He had a shower and he got ready to go back to his apartment, where he'd meet with Mina and 'Arikado' to check-in. He thanked me for letting him stay with him, and I told him not to worry about it.

I went home a few days later without talking to Soma at all sans a text I sent to make sure he was alright, and wouldn't be back until next year.