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Experiments, Ego, and Expectations

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Izuna is really having a trying day. No less than—hm, let him think—all of the clan Elders have stopped him today to discuss his lack of marriage and heirs. It’s really grating on his nerves, especially since he’s not even the clan head! And so, as he always does when marriage—and kids!—are brought up, he goes to his Aniki to complain.

(Maybe if he annoys Aniki more, he’ll actually attempt to find someone that can withstand his prickly nature. Hopefully.)

“Aniki!”

“Izuna, really. Must you?”

“I must!” Izuna is almost hurt by the long-suffering sigh that his Aniki gives him. He gives a polite nod to Hashirama—not only is he the new Hokage, but like, he could squish Izuna and he wouldn’t even notice until he’s already been squished. That demands at least a little politeness. Just a tad.

“And what, pray tell me, must you interrupt my work for?”

“Marriage!”

Madara gapes and sputters and nearly—oh nope, there goes the chair out the window.

“WHAT! WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU GETTING MARRIED TO?”

“I’m not!” He heatedly says back, then adds as an afterthought, “Unless it’s Tobirama.”

Izuna.”

“Okay, sheesh—the elders are getting on my case again. Want me to marry and have spawn.” He shudders.

“And that’s news, how?”

Izuna flails a bit, because Aniki is just not understanding. “Because I just said I don’t want to marry anyone but Tobirama!”

Silence.

“Heh, of course, the only person I’d ever want to carry my heirs would be Tobirama.”

“Izuna, really, that’s got to be the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.”

Izuna shrugs. “Maybe the Elders would finally get off my back about it all if you finally found someone.”

“FUCK OFF, IZUNA!”

Dodging the paperweight thrown at him, he laughs as he jumps out the window to the wonderful sounds of Aniki’s screeching and Hashirama’s inquisitive babbling.