Gasps of happiness were heard around the dining table. Tears welled up in my parents’ eyes. The triplets grinned evilly, already scheming for the wedding. Yuko was grinning widely, excited for me. Her husband was doing the same.
I wasn’t paying attention to any of them, though. My eyes were trained solely on the blonde sat beside Viktor and him only. The thing is, he was still processing what my fiancé just said.
It may seem a little weird to you that I’m focusing solely on Yurio’s reaction, but his opinion means a lot to Viktor and I both, the former person especially. He’s sort of like a younger brother to Viktor, so if Yurio doesn’t like our decision, definite strain and stress would be placed on our relationship. I love my fiancé too much for that to happen.
The relationship problems wouldn’t be Yurio’s fault, though, if that’s what you think I’m implying. Well, it would be, but not in a negative way! Yurio wouldn’t be in the wrong for having his own opinion and expressing it. No ones in the wrong for expressing their opinion, ever. It’s just- I don’t want anything to happen between Viktor and I. I’d be devastated. Actually, just thinking about not having Viktor in my life saddens me. It reminds me of the dark and depressing times of my past, especially the time period between the Sochi Grand Prix Final and when Viktor came to Japan to be my coach. I was in a terrible mental state at the time, and it’s not something I’d like to relive. Not ever. I doubted one hundred percent of everything I did; I never had the self confidence to do anything; I hated myself and my appearance. It was just an all-in-all terrible time. Not that I’m ashamed of it or anything. It’s a part of my life that has happened and is in the past and that’s all that matters. That doesn’t mean I’m proud of it though either. I honestly don’t think anyone would be proud of something like that.
I’ve grown, though, you know, since that time. I’m stronger — mentally and physically — and am more confident. It has really helped to have Viktor and my friends and family at my side the entire time. I honestly don’t know if losing someone now would knock me back as far as it did then, but you never know. Anything could happen.
I saw realization hit Yurio’s face. Anticipation and anxiety flooded my system. This is it. What will it be? What will his reaction be?
The seconds before he showed what he thought felt like eternity. I mean, it’s not a secret that Yurio isn’t the biggest fan of our relationship. Not just because he seems to get easily jealous of the attention Viktor gives me, but also because he doesn’t seem to like me very much. I mean, it’s not like he despises or hates my guts or anything (at least, I hope not), but I’m not his favourite person either. Being worried about this is reasonable.
A bright smile on the other Yuri’s face shook me out of my thoughts. In every scenario that I’ve played over in my mind, Yurio reacting so positively towards the concept of me marrying Viktor was never even in a figment of any of them. It’s very rare to see Yurio smile like that — you know, so big and wide — so I guess it’s pretty reasonable to have the thoughts I did. It was actually really endearing.
My mind was slow on what his reaction really meant, though. It took a couple moments for me to realize that he was fine with it, and the moment I did, relief flushed through my body. That was one less stress off my mind.
I smiled at him, letting him know I saw it. Yurio didn’t seem to like that I saw his smile, though, because it was wiped off his face as soon as he noticed. No, the Yurio could never be seen so happy at such a foolish thing. Not ever. That would be absolutely outrageous.
I glanced at Viktor beside me and smiled even wider. He was gazing straight back at me, a look of pure happiness and love and relief plastered across his face. All my other anxieties washed away as well; gone like the waves on a calm day. It was fine. All my worries seemed to be for nothing.
A thought came to my mind and my grin intensified at it. We’re engaged.