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Recovery (Where We Get Thrown into The Deep End and Learn How to Swim)

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Warning: This first chapter is a graphic depiction of his dream/memory of being raped, if you don't want to read it just skip to the next chapter everything will still make sense. 


Nightwing stumbled as he landed on the rooftop, he felt dizzy and was having trouble breathing. The rain was cold but somehow he felt too hot. What had he done, how had he allowed her to kill. he knew he was slowly going into emotional shock but he couldn't bring himself to care. His limbs felt like they weighed a thousand pounds, his eyes were blurry, his head pounded, it felt like there was an anvil on his chest, what had he done?

He was sitting on his knees when tarantula landed in front of him. What had he done, what had he done, he let her kill him, he let her kill, he was a killer. He tried to breath through the anvil weight constricting his lungs, he was a killer, a disappointment, a failure. He felt himself being slowly pushed back onto the roof. It was tarantula who was slowly laying him back "Don't touch me" he whispered out weakly Tarantula straddled his hips assuring him everything was okay, but it wasn't okay. How could it be okay, he was a killer?

"Poisonous" he muttered "numb, I... we killed him" With every passing second he felt strength leaving his body. He was numb to everything, the cold, Tarantulas weight, the loud Bludhaven streets below, it all swirling into one blur or numb pain. 

"Tsk, I killed him" Tarantula adjusted herself on his groin and reached up to take down her bun. Dick felt his body reacting to her movements, why was he reacting he didn't want this? 

"You were my responsibility" he argued weakly but she just put her hand on his chest and pushed him back against the roof. He didn't have the strength to fight her, he was so weak and numb. 

"Quiet" she ordered and leaned own putting a finger over his lips.

"Don't touch me" He protested one more time, weak and confused. She wasn't listening to him anymore, he hand went down to the zipper on his uniform pulling it down. He wanted to fight her but he didn't have the strength to more, he just let his head loll to side and closed his eyes. He could feel her grinding against him, his body was reacting as if he wanted this to happen. He was getting hard and he felt hormones flood his bloodstream, he didn't want this. Tears began to stream down his face, mixed with the rain water. He wished childishly that Batman would come save him, Batman wouldn't save him, he was a failure.

He tried to close his legs so she couldn't touch him, but she was stronger than him at he movement and pushed them back open. Sliding a hand under his uniform and rubbing his half hard penis. He choked back more tears, he knew that he was completely at her disposal. He didn't have any amount of strength. He tried to push himself into a sitting position to push her off but his arms didn't word and he he ended up collapsing back onto the ground. She get off his for a second, he prayed she decided to let him go. That would have been too easy, she unbuttoned her pants pulling them down.

Dick hated that his body reacted to this. He tried to will himself not to get an erection but it wasn't working. His erection pushed against his underwear and half unzipped uniform. He knew what she was going to do and he closed his eyes, unable to fight against this. 

"Shh querido" he heard his whispering inches from his face. He tried to bite back the tears but he couldn't. He was so weak and tired. He hated this, it hurt so much, he just wanted it to be over. He felt her finish removing the bottom of his uniform and then his underwear. 

This couldn't be real, thatch all he could think, this couldn't be real. But it was. She stroked his erection and he couldn't deny the sensations of pleasure that shot through his body. It made him feel sick and disgusting and dirty. How could he possibly be enjoying this. His body seemed to be acting on its own, his hips twitching into her trying to get more friction. His hormones flooded his body making him feel disgusting and horny all at once. His mouth let out small moans that sounded like pleasure and made him hate himself even more. 

He tried to close his legs again but she once again pushed them open and this time she lowered herself onto his penis with a loud moan. Dick bit his lip so hard he tasted blood, trying not to react. She was warm and soft, a sharp change from the cold hard rooftop and he couldn't stop her from what she was doing. 

She put her hands on his chest moving herself up and down on him. He turned his head and squeezed his eyes even tighter, refusing to look. He hated his body, reacting like he wanted this, like he enjoyed being raped on a rooftop unable to defend himself. Time was a haze, he didn't know how long he'd been there. He felt his body orgasm but it filled him with sickness rather than pleasure. Tarantula stopped only to touch and feel his body till he was hard again. Then she was back to riding him, moaning and saying his name. He wanted it o stop, he wanted everything to stop. He wished he was dead right beside blockbuster. 


 

Dick jerked awake, he was covered in cold sweat. He looked around frantically. He was in his own bed, at the manor, safe. As he tried to readjust he came to a realization that made him sick to his stomach. He had a very painful erection and his boxers were covered in sticky semen. He once again felt betrayed by his bodies reaction to her, even in dream form his body acted like it wanted her. Like it wanted what had happened. 

Tentevly he reached down touching himself through the boxers. A shot of hormones and adrenaline rushed through his body. He closed his eyes trying to will the problem away but the ghost feeling of Tarantula on his, touching him only made it worse. Dick was laying on his back and suddenly he was feeling like he could move. He felt like he was right back on that rooftop too tired and weak to do anything. He could feel her hands all over him and tears began to fall off his cheaks against his will. The sensory memories playing over and over again on his body.