Chapter 1: Prologue
This was fucked up. Our whole friendship felt like that for the past couple of weeks. One minute it was cold then the next it was back to normal yet again like nothing happened. I never knew there were any risks when I started to be friends with a shifter, even though everyone around me warned me that this might be too difficult. Maybe I just wanted to show them that it was possible, but as time went by I realized that the real problem wasn’t exactly that he was a shifter, it was the fact that feelings got in the way like it always does. Because he was a shifter it only made things even more challenging.
As I looked into his eyes I was sure he knew. He could easily smell my worry from miles away, hearing far too sensitive not to notice how my heart was pounding inside of my chest. His animal DNA slowly took over his actions, dark eyes dilating so much it seemed like his chocolate brown orbs turned into jet black. I was in trouble. I knew the smartest decision would be to make a run for it, so I quickly turned around, but it was futile. He grabbed my hand quickly, shoving me to our living room’s wall, coming closer to my neck. His cold nose touched my heated up skin, making my breath hitch. He took a deep breath, one hand resting right next to my head, while the other one still held my arm firmly, no intention of letting it go.
“I’m sorry.” he mumbled, breath tickling my neck “I’m trying to hold back.”
“Try harder,” I replied in a weak tone.
Rather than saying something, he just licked my neck.
“Anie, you can’t live off of energy drinks.”
“I’m serious, I know the exams are difficult but you have to sleep at least a little bit.”
“Well I have an exam in two days, yet I’m out drinking beer with you.”
“Dude, don’t you dare try to blame it on me.”
Rae poked my cheek with her finger while trying to reason with my stubborn mind, which was impossible.
We were seated in the far corner of a pub, 10 PM, packed with people, even though it was a Tuesday. The rain was pouring outside, obviously, almost no one would walk around, everyone would rather stay inside or just sit in a bar. Rae drank her whiskey slowly, tasting the poison with delight, while I watched her with a disgusted expression on my face. I never knew why she liked this type of alcohol that much, it was far too strong for me.
“Your hair has been looking rough.” she grabbed a smaller strand, examining it in the dim light “You should come to me after the exams end.”
“Yea, I should but last time you accidentally turned my hair purple-”
“Which looked gorgeous on you, might I add.”
“Still, we aimed for light brown, how the fuck you fucked it up so bad it’s still a mystery for me.”
“I’m a student just like you, we can make mistakes sometimes.”
Just remembering the incident made us laugh. It seemed like it was such a long time ago, though it only happened maybe right before Christmas, which was approximately a little over a month ago. She had fewer exams than me, but still, we studied hard and because Rae wanted to be a hairstylist, as a best friend, I had to be the guinea pig. My hair has been going through some trauma since we were friends, but nowadays she started to be better and better, until Christmas. Since then my hair was a deep shade of purple, which I didn’t exactly mind, but I still missed my honey brown hair now and then. Apparently, the colour was supposed to come out eventually, but my hair seemed to be stubborn as well since it still had that plum purple shade.
“I should go.” I yawned and checked the time on my watch. 1 AM. Damn, it was already so late.
“Bummer, I thought we would stay until morning.”
“My last bus will leave in half an hour and I have to go to the station too.”
“Fine grandma, we’ll talk through messages, yeah?”
“Of course, you aren’t getting rid of me that easily.”
“Duh, I need my piggy.”
She hugged me close, and I cuddled closer, smelling her floral perfume. I smiled to myself as I went to the other direction. The rain must have stopped hours ago, and now it looked like it might snow. The sky had a grey tint, which made me worried that a snowstorm was ahead, so I accelerated my pace. Some young adults and university students passed me, laughing loudly at something, while I cursed myself for leaving my headphones in my other jacket. Now I could hear all the loud noises around me, including the lousy catcalls from men after I passed them. I almost got out from the street to the main road when I saw something from the corner of my eye next to a container.
I grimaced, almost immediately approaching the bigger cat that lay there, visibly injured. He had a beautiful ash grey colour with golden orbs that screamed “get away from me”, but I ignored all the red flags that told me the cat wanted to be left alone since his tail wagged aggressively, his stare spiteful. I quickly noticed that around his right front leg the grey fur was darker and as I squinted my eyes I could see that it was blood. He had some other minor injuries on the back but that was all I could observe, since the cat was trying to get away from me, slowly backing up, until he meowed again, this time in pain.
My heart sank seeing this poor creature hurting so bad. I wanted to help, desperately, but at the same time I didn’t want the cat to think that I wanted to harm him further, so I timidly crouched down to his level looking at his hurt leg then into his eyes.
“I want to help.”
I mumbled, hoping that he understood my intention. I felt my phone buzz in my pocket, signalling that I got a new message, probably from Rae, but I completely ignored it, while trying to get even closer to the cat. His fur was fluffy, but clearly, he wasn’t at a normal weight, not to mention all the wounds. I was sure he was stray, which made me even sadder.
Taking a deep breath I unsurely held out my hand to him so maybe he could smell it, but all he did was back away until he winced in pain. My lips were in a straight line, no way in hell I could leave him outside in this weather, he would die from the wounds or the cold, either way, I had to take him somehow home, without a question. But I had no idea how. We must have been looking at each other for a few minutes since I could feel my hands getting ice cold.
“Kitty please let me help.”
I murmured softly again, bending closer to him. I blew on my hands to make them warm up a little, though it was in vain. He started to blink slowly, which was a good sign in my dictionary, suddenly I felt a little brave so I held out my hand again, this time he smelled it then looked at me. I cautiously put my hand near his fluffy ear, earning a low purr from him. This made me break out in a huge smile. Finally, I could see some progress. The wind blew my purple hair in front of my eyes, the storm was really coming closer and closer. Just now I remembered that I missed my last bus, so now I had to take a taxi home. Sighing in defeat I continued to cautiously pet around his ear, while he purred.
“Okay, buddy. I’m taking you home and treating you, okay?”
He already started to protest, which didn’t surprise me at all. I called a taxi and gingerly lifted him up, trying to avoid all the wounds he had, but the fact that he was scratching and biting my hands made it pretty difficult to me not to drop him on the ground. I held him close to my chest, telling him how everything will be fine, even though he was wiggling as much as he could, but over time he became weaker, which worried me more than all the bleeding scratches he left on my hands. His body was light, which wasn’t normal for a cat as big as he was, so I told my address quickly to the driver while watching how the cat still squirmed in my grip, trying to get away.
It was torture until I walked to the third floor but opening the door was even worse. I had to balance the cat and quickly get out my keys, which gave him a perfect opportunity to get away if he had the energy. By the time I put him down on the rug he was beaten tired, eyes barely open. I got my shoes off and tossed them away in the corner, not caring where it landed and got my winter jacket off leaving it on the floor as it was while rushing to my room to see if I had any bandages or disinfectant. Luckily my mom always sent me medical stuff, being too afraid that I will die alone, so I got all the stuff I needed and quickly walked back to the entrance, where the cat was still laying there, looking around.
“Hey, it’s okay. I bought you some stuff. It will hurt like a motherfucker, but you’re a survivor.”
I licked my lips while concentrating on opening the disinfectant. I poured some of it on a cotton pad until it was soaked, then with one hand, I held him down so I could disinfect all his wounds. It was a hell of a battle yet again, but in the end, he let me, but only because he was too exhausted. After taking care of the wounds I cut down some of his furs to see how bad the wounds were, but they looked pretty okay. Still, I wanted to call a vet next thing in the morning, so they could come and check him out.
I bandaged his right leg, too afraid to put any cream on it I just left it like that, who knows, maybe it would cause him only more harm. I remembered I still had tons of milk in my fridge, so I poured one in a cup that he could drink from and I put it in the microwave for a few seconds. While waiting for his dinner to heat up I searched for one of my favourite fluffy blanket, a white one with stars on it, and delicately tucked the cat in it and laid it next to me on my bed. He didn’t even fight me at this point, just lazily blinked a few times, to me it seemed like he would fall asleep any second now, but there was no way I would let him rest until he ate a little.
I nudged him softly showing him the milk right in front of his face. In a matter of minutes, he drank it all up, then probably as soon as he finished he fell asleep. I still put more than enough milk in the cup and left it on the floor, in case at night he would wake up hungry. I sighed going to shower and decided to call Rae and put her on speaker.
“What up?” she answered still in a normal tone like it wasn’t way past 2 AM.
“So I fucked shit up.”
“Damn, what did you do this time?”
“I brought a stray cat home.”
“Jesus H. Christ, this is worse than anything you’ve done before!”
“Not that bad. Besides, he was half dead I had to take care of him, you would have done the same.”
“What will you do with him now?”
“Keep it, duh!”
“You really didn’t think this through now, have you?”
“What do you suggest then oh big Dalai Llama?”
“Just…” she sighed and paused for a moment “Nothing. Congratulations on your new cat. When are you taking it to the vet?”
“It’s a he, and tomorrow I’ll call a family friend. She should come here, it will be fine.”
“Why are you so chill about this?”
“Actually I’m so afraid something really bad happened to him. Literally, he had so many wounds, I felt so sorry and he was just so scared. I think he’s passed out for now for like a day, but-”
“Breath, girl, breath.”
“Sorry, I just lost my cool for a quick second. I will get back to you tomorrow, I am dead.”
“Okay, sleep tight.”
I put some soft music so it would relax my mind, while I brushed my teeth. When I went back to my room the cat was still asleep in the same position I left him. After changing into my pyjamas and doing my night routine I checked with the back of my hand if he was still breathing, and I only calmed down when I felt the cold air hit my palm. I sighed while getting in my bed, he was sleeping soundly, not even reacting to the movement I made next to him. I turned around looking in the dark at my hands, even though I knew I couldn’t see anything, I felt the pain he caused me. The scratches weren’t deep but they hurt so bad and they were bleeding a little until I showered.
It was weird sleeping with a cat next to me. Lucky my bed was not for one person, because it would have been a nightmare, but this way it was easy enough for me to knock myself out until I woke up to my alarm. It was 8 AM and I didn’t feel like waking up at all. I groaned, tossing and turning when I remembered I had a cat in my home. Fearfully I looked around my room, he was nowhere to be seen, but everything still looked intact, the cup empty on the floor. I quickly got out of my bed starting to search for him, calling him pet names and just generally making cat sounds in the hope that he will come out of somewhere.
Panicking was an understatement of how I felt while searching the small apartment when suddenly I heard a noise coming from the kitchen. I walked inside only to see the cat crawling from under the cupboard. We stared at each other for a good 30 seconds, when I sighed loudly, every worry gone from my system when I saw he could walk now.
“So I assume you’re better now.”
He mowed at me coming closer, that’s when I noticed he still was too afraid to properly put all his weight on his right leg. Pouting I crouched down and started to play with his ears and scratch underneath his head, around his neck, enjoying how he purred now much louder than yesterday. I guess he was glad that I took care of him.
“I don’t have any cat food, sadly.” I mumbled while getting out the milk from the fridge “So you’re getting this.”
I put much more milk than yesterday, wanting to see him in better shape as soon as possible. After I slightly microwaved the milk I left him to eat and called the vet. She said she would come around later and until then I shouldn’t do anything to the cat. I thanked her, then went on to have breakfast. Simple toast with butter and jam, and some tea after it. The cat wanted to get some too, but I wasn’t sure if it was a good idea for an animal to eat human food, so I just gave him more milk. He looked at me sassily, but I just rolled my eyes at him.
“What now? I can’t give you this, yesterday you were dying.”
He turned around anyway and started to drink up the milk. I finished up my morning routine then changed my clothes to some comfortable ones when my phone rang. It was the vet, she was coming in a few minutes. I closed the door on the cat, afraid that it might run out the first chance he got when the doorbell rang. I opened the door to see Clara, a woman in her forties, jet black hair up in a bun, green eyes looking kindly at me. She was in her winter jacket, snow visible on her hair and shoulders.
“Come on in, thanks for coming so soon.”
“Of course, anything for a kitten. Where is he?”
“In my bedroom. Should I leave you two alone?”
“It might be better.”
I took her jacket and put it on a coat hook, worriedly leading her to my room. I left them there, sitting down on one of the chairs in my kitchen. My feet were bouncing up and now, while I was messaging back and forth with Rae, afraid of what the outcome will be. I prayed really hard for the gods that the cat will be fine and he didn’t have any big injury that would last. Clara took her sweet time, which was perfectly normal in any case, but this time I felt even more concerned. The minutes passed until it was already half an hour and I just couldn’t stand it anymore. I walked in front of my door knocking on it.
“Is everything okay?”
“Minor difficulties only. We will be done in a few minutes.”
“Is he badly injured?” she waited a few seconds before answering.
“He will survive, that’s for sure. I’ll be out in a few minutes.”
“Alright.” I was about to go back to the kitchen when she called after me.
“Would you make me a coffee, please? And a chamomile tea, if you have any.”
While getting the ingredients ready for the beverages I tried listening to her or in general any sounds from my room, but nothing. It seemed like it was dead silent. I continued messaging with Rae, also checking my social media when I heard my room open. I instantly looked over to the corner to see Clara with a sour facial expression. My stomach made a few flips, anxiety slowly spreading through my chest, making breathing hard for me.
“What happened?” I asked in a low tone, voice cracking slightly.
“We should sit down. This might be a long conversation.”
“Okay. Tea or coffee?”
I remembered how my mother always told me to keep my cool in any situation, especially since I wanted to be a journalist, I never know what kind of topic I might have to write about. I did learn about this in my classes, and now it was time to put it into practice. She had a bothered expression, that's when I asked her again the question since she was probably absent-minded.
"Coffee, please. One spoon of sugar and a little milk.”
“Okay, and the tea?”
“For later,” she replied sighing.
“Can you tell me now?”
“Sorry I’m being so secretive, you must be worried sick.”
She smiled lightly, taking a sip out of the still-hot coffee, sighing in delight when the aroma hit her tongue. I waited patiently, playing slightly with my fingers, my breathing irregular even though my face was unreadable.
“Clara just tell me the truth, are the injuries that serious?”
“At all, in fact, he’s almost healed perfectly. The wounds aren’t that deep anymore, it might take two days and he will be completely back to normal, except for the weight of course. He’s quite skinny, clearly…” she paused for a moment, looking deep into my eyes “I have to ask you something. What do you know about shifters?”
“Shifters?” I asked completely caught off guard “Well, in general, what other people. I don’t know every little detail, that’s for sure. Why? Have you been working with them too?”
“I do actually, but only since last year. They’re peculiar creatures, but honestly, not much different from humans. They are humans, only their DNA is different, and of course the transformation.”
“Okay?” I was beyond confused because for me it seemed like she was dancing around a subject.
“Listen, this might be a topic hard to…”
“He’s a shifter or what?” I asked laughing slightly, thinking that this might be a joke, but when I noticed that she started to slowly nod her head the smile on my face disappeared.
The adrenaline and panic in the air were palpable. We just stared at each other, because I had no idea what to say, my mind is completely blank, no words came out from my mouth. I knew now why was she hesitant to talk about it since it included a shifter. The government didn’t exactly favour them, still thinking that most of them were some monsters, so this led to lots of debates, new laws, panic and generally small chaos in the world.
Nowadays everything seemed to calm down a little since hybrids and shifters weren’t that rare anymore, but still, they could only do particular jobs, go to specific places, which was plain stupid in my opinion. It seemed to me just like the beginning of World War II. all over again with the germans and the jews, though this was a much lighter version of it. Still, they had it fairly rough, trafficking them was common, owning them was even more common. They used shifters for different types of jobs, exceptionally in psychology, but you never really knew who was a shifter, unless they were declared. They looked like any other human, only they had animalistic behaviours and could shift to their animal form, then there were the hybrids, who couldn’t transform at all, or only in rare cases, but still, they had ears and tails, depending on their animal DNA. A mess. A whole mess.
The possibility of me bringing home a shifter was lower than low, and I wasn’t sure how to react and what to do since this was the last thing on my mind. Clara saw how unfazed I was, which probably wasn’t a reaction she was prepared for therefore she suddenly started to explain.
“I asked him, about how he became stray and what happened to him, but he refused to answer any of my questions, unless…” she paused for a moment “well, you talk with him.”
“Me?” I asked bewildered.
"Yes. You found him and took care of him, so I would guess that he became fond of you, even though he doesn’t seem the type to admit, especially since he’s a cat shifter. He scented all the apartment. In fact, he scented you too.”
“What does that even mean?”
Our voices were mere whispers at this point, no idea why. She told me it was futile for her to explain everything since it would take hours and hours, so for now, the best choice would be to determine what I wanted to do with him. This only baffled me further on, in my eyes he wasn’t an object I could own, but apparently, because he doesn’t have a home, at least that’s what she knew, he can’t exactly roam the streets again. The human, and vet in her wouldn’t let her do that, which was understandable, but at the same time, my confusion grew by the minute. I did my best to somehow put everything in order in my brain, organize all the information into sections, but I gave up halfway, my head hurt. The tea seemed like a good idea now, but Clara advised me to give the boy the tea, so I grabbed the mug, which became cold by now, and put it in the microwave. As I watched the mug turn I thought about what should I do, but as my mind worked at the highest speed I decided to just give up. I will see what will happen when I enter the room.
“Do you want to come too?” I asked her, hesitating before entering the room that was still closed.
“No, I’d rather want for you to talk alone with him, that’s what he asked.”
“Okay then, I’ll be back soon, or maybe you can come back later?”
“You’re right, I have other things to care of, so how about I come back in the afternoon?”
“Sure, uhm, can he eat anything he wants?”
“Oh, without a problem, when he’s in human form he can eat as much as he wants, in cat form he needs to eat a specific food. I suggest Ravi and Castrole, they have lots of vitamins. I’ll get going then.”
“Thank you for coming.”
She left the apartment leaving me and my anxiety behind. I looked at my door, it was still closed, no noise coming from the inside. With a deep breath, I gently opened it up, only to reveal a skinny boy in front of me, sitting in my bed, looking at his hands. As soon as I entered he glanced up, looking at me with his chocolate dark brown eyes curiously.
His hair was grey, but in the sunlight, it seemed like it was silver, meanwhile, his skin was pale. He wore a tattered and dirty black shirt with black jeans, that had holes in it, his feet bare. His right hand was bandaged, on his face some small scratches, he overall looked awful. I instantly felt pity for him, obviously, he was under the healthy weight, since his collarbones were far too visible, not to mention his face was so thin.
It seemed like an eternity while I stood near the door just staring at him. I had so many thoughts, yet I couldn’t utter a word. It was he who slowly started to speak.
“Hello. I’m sorry you had to… find out this way.”
His voice was deep and raspy, seemed like he hasn’t used it since who knows when.
“I made you tea. What’s your name?”
“Min Yoongi.” he replied automatically.
“I’m Reigh Yuuna. Nice to meet you.”
“Is it really.”
He mumbled while getting the tea from me. It hurt me to see him like this even though I didn’t know him at all. I felt sorry for him, not even thinking for a second that this might be dangerous since a total stranger was in my home and a shifter at that. Yoongi was just a normal guy in my eyes, only when he zoned out a little I realized how he scrunched his nose every few seconds, scanning the room.
“Thank you for helping me.” he blurted out of nowhere, his face undecipherable “I want you to be my owner.”
“No. There’s no way for that. Impossible.” I shook my head fast “You’re not a chair.”
“I still want-”
“Yoongi stop for a second, okay? Why don’t you drink tea? Take a shower and eat something? I still have leftovers from my last lunch.”
He looked at me without saying anything, hands still holding tightly the mug. I wanted to ask him so many questions, but I didn’t want to come off as rude, so I tried to talk with him like every normal human being, after all, he looked and acted like one. I never got to talk like this with shifters, only with a handful of hybrids, but I was sure he was different than them in more than a way.
Yoongi drank the tea slowly, then made a funny face.
“Not sweet enough.”
I chuckled at this, getting up to go get him some more sugar. I nearly had a heart attack when I turned around and he was already there staring at me, blinking emotionlessly a few times. This reminded me yet again that in fact, he wasn’t exactly the same as I was.
“Here, some sugar.”
“Do you want anything to eat?”
Even though he said that I could clearly hear how his stomach protested, so while snickering I went to my fridge to see what I’ve got. Definitely needed to do a shopping spree after this.
As I microwaved every leftover that I had I just realized that in my mind I already started to think in plural, which was odd, since I wasn’t even sure that I could afford to pay for another person. Normally I had money for everything, but this time it was slightly different, if he was to live with me it meant double trouble, and my apartment wasn’t the biggest either. One question and problem after another popped up in my head making me exasperated until I noticed Yoongi staring at me. He scrunched up his nose, not touching yet the food that I put on the table. He only watched me from the side of the door.
“Aren’t you going to eat?”
“Can I? Eat at the table?” this question confused me even more.
“But of course, why wouldn’t you?”
“My previous owners didn’t let me eat there, though you would be mad too,” he answered touching his ear lightly, avoiding eye contact.
“Yoongi you can eat whenever and wherever you like, honestly.”
My voice maybe sounded easy, but my mind was racing. This was a huge problem. I had a really bad feeling about all of this, and the way he ate only made me even more suspicious about my theory, that those injuries weren’t from a fight with another shifter or whatever, it was his owner. He took really slow bites at the beginning, then suddenly he started to eat like someone who hasn’t seen food in a million years, which made him cough badly.
“Hey, hey, slowly, okay? There’s more in the fridge and I can always buy something too.”
“Urgh, sorry.” he mumbled, then ate properly again “Did you do it?”
“Yes, I always cook for myself. Going out can be expensive.”
Without saying anything I put him seconds, leaving me with an almost empty fridge. Nevermind, I still had some food, I just had to cook it later today, which reminded me of my upcoming exam. Frowning I sighed, looking up at the ceiling.
“What’s bothering you?”
“Exams, nothing too serious,” I mumbled then looked at him from the corner of my eye. He was watching me intently, bowls empty. “Want to take a shower? Maybe I can see if I find something in my closet for you to wear.”
“I want to be owned by you.”
My heart started beating faster, which he probably sensed, since he got up from the chair and sat right next to me, coming closer to my face. I was literally pressed against the wall, trying to get away from his intense gaze, when he suddenly started to purr.
“This is embarrassing.”
He scoffed getting up from his seat leaving the kitchen to run away in my room. I had to put a hand in front of my face to muffle the chuckles that erupted, because of the adorable cat behaviour he had. His ears were red, and I could clearly see how his cheeks were also flushed, but honestly, I found nothing embarrassing about this, it was something normal for him, so I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it. Still grinning I decided to wash the dishes, giving him some time to cool down, then I went back to my room to check up on him. He was still in his human form, laying on my bed in a fetus position, dozing off.
“Yoongi I know this is all new and everything, but we have to talk.”
“I hate that sentence. Makes me cringe, reminds me of some really bad times,” he replied making a face.
“Everybody does, but we just have to. You can’t exactly go back to the streets.”
“I escaped. I had to, they were horrible to me.” he suddenly explained, only taking glances at me “I didn’t want to be there anymore. Can I live with you from now on?”
“Was the food that good?” I asked jokingly, trying to ease the pretty obvious tension.
“Can we skip to the part where we are done with all the paperwork and I’m yours?”
“You’re a really nice guy, but I still have to think this through. I have no idea how all of this works, and if this environment would be okay for you. Besides, I’m not a millionaire, so I guess I would have to work beside university.”
“I can work too, that’s no problem, I can just go to a psychology facility and act like a cat assisting therapy session, fuck if I care!” his voice was strong and full with passion, making my heart clench “Whatever, I’ll do anything just let me live here.”
“You really shouldn’t use these words, what if I’m actually a bad person and want to traffic you?”
“You are not, I can sense and smell things humans don’t.” he hopped off from the bed and went beside me smelling the air “You’re not like them.”
“How is it different?”
I was more than intrigued to know everything about shifters, from start to finish, but Yoongi kept quiet about it, avoiding eye contact most of the times, or staring at me intently the next minute when he explained something. I had a feeling he left some important details out, but as we sat in front of each other in my room I felt a strong connection between us, something like I never felt before. He was soft-spoken, blunt and overall just said whatever he thought without sugar-coating everything, which was fine by me, at least I understood his point of view better.
All the while he talked and I asked questions I had this sudden need to search for a notebook and write down everything like I was in a class, but I had a feeling it would be totally awkward after that so I just kept silent while he explained and tried to memorize everything the best way I could. By listening.
Yoongi talked about his DNA, how cats worked in general and scenting, and he talked a lot especially about what it meant to be owned by someone. I had no idea that shifters had to wear a collar too outside with the street number, name and phone number of the person they were owned by, but the truth is that I never really paid much attention to it before. He also said that he’ll search for a job as soon as we get the paperwork part out of the way, and even if it’s not much he will give me all of his salary, because that’s how things worked in these types of relationships.
In the end, we discussed this topic so much that it was already afternoon and Clara called me if she can come. There were many things to take care of, especially on the formal side, but I wasn’t really scared of it since I knew Clara would help me. In fact, I was more frightened about the “living together” part, because I had no idea what to expect, that’s why I made a mental note to myself to ask Clara about all the details, even the ones I wasn’t sure I wanted to know about.
Snow covered everything outside, which made me get home harder than it already was. I was on my phone with Rae while waiting for the bus to advance, but it looked like the snowstorm got so big it was difficult to see anything. At least it was nice and warm inside, so I looked outside, instantly getting shivers from the sight before my eyes. It appeared like the beginning of a catastrophe movie, and the fact that I wasn’t home yet made things 10 times worse since I was starting to get worried about Yoongi.
Almost one week passed since Clara started to help me with paperwork and how this whole ordeal needed to be like, and finally, between all the studies and exams I got everything done. The paperwork was finished pretty soon, but only because Clara was a family friend and she had the right acquaintances. The one exam I had today was the last, and now all I wanted to do was to go home to watch a movie or two with Yoongi and chill, but the weather had to ruin it. For more than an hour, I was in traffic so I decided to call Rae, who was cosily between her sheets at home.
“Damn, when will it be over?” she asked while munching on some crisps right into my ear.
“Fuck my life, no idea, but I’m getting stressed here.” not really, I was as cool as a cucumber, while watching a tornado-like wind pass by us.
“You might die today fam, might not make it alive home to greet your kitten.”
“Damn, I forgot all about him. I hope he’s fine.”
“He’s a cat, I’m sure he’s napping away in some corner of the apartment, not even noticing that you went out.”
I haven’t told Rae yet that I owned legally a shifter, because I knew it would cause so much drama, and between all the paperwork and the studies, I just had no time to think about when and how I should tell her. In the end I didn’t do it at all, in fact, besides our vet, no one knew, and it was perfect this way. I wasn’t sure how they would take this information, so I’d rather play along with the fact that Yoongi is just a normal cat until it’s necessary to tell them.
“Right, oh, sorry, someone is calling.”
“It’s okay, if you feel like dying hit me up, hope you arrive home safely.”
“Bitch me too.”
We said goodbye to each other and I answered my phone but at the same time almost cooed out loud. It was Yoongi. When I decided he will live with me I gave him my previous phone, which wasn’t the best but it was still pretty okay for him, at least for now. Still, it was a smartphone so he wasn’t exactly lost back in the stone age.
“Where are you?” his voice sounded awfully neutral but I knew he’s actually worried about me. Somewhere deep inside.
“On the bus, dying of boredom.”
“You should hurry if you don’t want to die out in the storm”
“Say that to the driver. Or even better, the storm.”
“But you said we’ll watch a movie.”
“Just say you want to be caressed and go.” he scoffed loudly which made me giggle.
“No, that is your favourite thing to do, not mine! I just comply.”
“Yes, you’re absolutely right. I don’t know if I’m in the mood to pet you today though.”
There was a long pause before he spat fine then hung up on me. It took all my power to not laugh out loud in the packed bus, since the atmosphere inside was tense and full with worried people, while I was being my giggly self, not bothered even for a second that I won’t arrive home safely.
It’s really incredible to think that Yoongi has been living with me for only a week because it seemed like it has been months since I came home with his kitten form. In that one week so many things happened, it was ridiculous. We went out several times to buy him clothes, food and a collar since he had to wear one whenever he went outside alone or even if he was with me. I had no idea there was a law like this, which wasn’t that much of a shock. After talking with Clara and Yoongi I just realized how little I knew about hybrids and shifters, actually I started to think about browsing the internet, maybe I can find something helpful.
I arrived home almost two hours later. I was starving, thirsty and I wanted to pee so bad, but when I opened the door I almost had a heart attack. Yoongi was in his cat form, looking up at me in what looked like an annoyed expression. I sighed while closing the door behind me.
“Hey don’t get angry now. I was in traffic, but guess what? I bought us some frozen pizza, and with this, I’m yet again broke.”
I put the pizza on the kitchen table then hurried off to the bathroom, Yoongi fast behind me. Before he could sneak in I closed the door in front of his nose. He started to meow loudly and scratch the door until he realized I wasn’t going to let him in, especially since I was peeing already.
“You never let me.” he stated in a pouty voice from the other side “Why? I was in my cat form.”
“So what? You’re still a guy and human. I don’t get it why we have to have this conversation every time I close you out.”
“You’ve been away for days.”
“In cat form, it seemed like days.”
I groaned after flushing the toilet. While I washed my hands I looked at myself in the mirror questioning the life decisions that led me to this situation. For sure I was ready to read more about it on the internet, because we had this mini fight at least twice a day, and I just couldn’t understand his reasoning. If this is even considered as a reason.
He was already in the kitchen when I finished. He put both of the pizza in the oven not caring that I entered the room. I started to walk towards him, but he turned around and looked at me with nasty eyes that definitely said stay away or I will bite, even though it was in his human form.
“Hungry?” I asked in a casual tone, but he still didn’t answer me “Come on Yoongi you can’t ignore me forever.”
He walked away to the living room that has been slightly changed since he lived there. Now it was more like his own room, which made me literally broke and still we somehow had to survive until my parents sent me money again next month. I decided to take a shower and listen to some music while he was sulking alone. I knew he would become putty if I played with his hair, a trick I mastered from day two, but right now I felt way too tired for all of this, and honestly just wanted to relax a little bit.
This time he didn’t try to come in the bathroom, clearly still pissed off about me not letting him in every time everywhere I was. I was singing along to the funky melody, already feeling happier from the music, while washing my body with my favourite vanilla-scented douche gel. I changed into my pyjamas in the bathroom then hung the wet towel, that’s when I heard the oven’s sound go off, meaning our food was ready. I wasn’t expecting Yoongi to be willing to help me with anything, so I walked to my room getting my laptop and bringing it outside to his area. He was still laid down in his bed, not even moving.
“Do you want milk with your pizza?” I noticed his fingers twitch, which I took as a yes “Fine, be right back then.”
I was singing and dancing along to the song that still went on and on in my head, cutting the pizza and putting them on plates then the dishes on a bigger tray. I put the ketchup and mayonnaise, then went on to put a mug of milk in the microwave. Until it heated up I bought the food to his place and put them on the small coffee table. The laptop was already on, movie ready, which was weird since I don’t remember turning it on. I glanced at Yoongi, but he was still in the same position. I almost believed myself that I was going crazy and being senile at a young age, but then I noticed his back was quickly moving up and down, meaning that he did everything super quick to be ready until I came back.
Smiling big I made my way back to the kitchen to get his milk. By the time I arrived back he was sitting up, warm blanket over half of his body.
He whispered while taking the milk from me. He stopped for a second only to stare at my hand, but I paid no mind to it. The pizza was still hot and crispy, so I had the greatest enjoyment in devouring it while watching the movie. My fuzzy socks were on and I was on a roll, didn’t even notice what Yoongi did until he accidentally touched my hand. I looked over to ask him what did he want, but he looked at me with huge brown eyes, like he wanted to tell me something.
“Yoongi I can’t read minds.”
“Well sometimes I really wish you could,” he whined after catching on that I had no idea what he wanted from me.
“Just tell me.”
“It’s embarrassing saying it out loud,” he mumbled suddenly feeling self-conscious.
I looked at him for a moment, my heart slightly hurting from seeing him like this. I stopped the movie and put down my plate on the tray, focusing only on him now.
“Tell me. Nothing is too embarrassing for me.”
“It’s a cat thing” I smiled slightly, he always started off like this and it usually meant something weird would come right after this sentence “You know we scent things.”
“Yes, we talked about this before. It’s a normal thing.”
“And we scent people too.”
“We talked about this too?”
“Can you what?”
“You’re really making this hard for me Yuuna.”
He was pouting, eyes turning a yellow shade for a second, that made me wince a little. We just looked at each other without saying anything when it finally clicked in my mind. I smiled at him and bought my hand to his face intending to play with his hair. It was barely close to his face when he suddenly grabbed it with both of his hands and bought it close to his face. I immediately felt how hot his skin felt, even though it didn’t seem flushed at all. While he was scenting my hand I turned on the movie, because it would be way too awkward to just watch him do his cat thing.
I tried concentrating on the plot as much as I possibly could, but the fact that Yoongi was snuggling my hand then my whole arm was a little diverting my attention. When he suddenly hugged my whole body I twitched looking at him so fast my neck started to hurt.
“What?” he asked not paying any attention to his actions.
“Can you be a little bit subtle about it at least?”
He quickly retreated at the end of the sofa, the blanket falling on the floor from his sudden movement. I looked at him sadly, I didn’t want him to feel bad about showing affection the way he could, because his last owners couldn’t care less about him. They haven’t showered him with love, so now basically I had to teach him everything about human interactions, which was a handful. He didn’t tell me much about his owners, just that it was an older couple who didn’t have a child, and basically, they just bought him from the black market. He didn’t tell me why he was in the black market, or how old he was, in fact, he spared me almost every detail. Still, I understood him completely so I came closer to him unsurely, putting my hand on his shoulder.
“Can you scent me if we cuddle?”
“Yes.” he blurted out suddenly, looking everywhere but my face.
“Okay, then come on.”
“I.... maybe it would be easier to turn into my cat form and when I’m finished I will transform back.”
“Whatever suits you.”
I turned around, since he didn’t want to show me his transformation just yet, and went back to my place putting the plate back in my lap to eat the rest of the pizza. Turning on the movie I started to watch it again while Yoongi snuggled up against my sides, rubbing his cheeks against my hips then staring at me and meowing loudly. I glanced at him, he was staring at my lap. Without a word I grabbed the plate and held it under my chin so he can comfortably lay down in my lap. He hopped in and rested his chin on my thigh.
I had a hunch he was actually a really snuggly guy, but because of his previous owners, he didn’t like to show it that much when he was in his human form. Sometimes the cat’s DNA was more powerful, making him do some weird stuff, at least weird for fully humans. I watched him slowly doze off, my hand automatically coming near his ear to rub it. Purring happily he fell asleep.
“Thank fuck we could finally meet!”
I was in a rundown cafe with Rae, we haven’t seen each other since I found Yoongi on the streets, which was approximately almost two weeks ago. Every time she invited me out I couldn’t go since I was doing paperwork and studying while buying stuff for Yoongi and rearranging the apartment so we could both fit in it. It was a mess, but it was worth it, and since Yoongi went out for a job interview I could easily be with Rae as much as I liked.
He was quick to start being needy, starting from the moment I leave the apartment, and even though I told him several times he can go out whenever he likes, he went out only if it was with me. This time though he had no choice, so I finally enjoyed my phone being silent and my best friend’s company yet again.
“Yea I know, even though I have no money now.”
“Nah, it’s alright, you’ll just give me back when your parents send you money. By the way, you want to go out and party tonight?”
“Urgh, don’t really know about that.”
“We should though, we haven’t been out to party in such a long time.”
“Dude, I know. How about I just go to your place and we watch our serial?”
“That’s not-” she started to laugh, but then agreed “We’ll buy alcohol?”
“Sure thing. Feels like I need it after these exams.”
We have been talking for quite some time, maybe two hours when I saw a new message on my phone. At first, I thought it was Yoongi, but it was actually my mom, so I called her and told her that I would go by their place at the weekend. Because I would anyway go to Rae’s place tonight I decided to go home earlier and spend some time with Yoongi.
I got home somewhat early, the cold making my cheeks flushed, especially my ears. Outside the weather was unforgiving, I was afraid of actually getting sick, but as soon as I entered the flat and felt the warm air hit my face I sighed in delight. I could hear from here how Yoongi was watching something on my laptop, but when he heard me come in, he almost immediately came to say hi with a shy demeanour. He still tried to hold back his cat DNA as much as he could, but sometimes it broke loose, which I found normal, even though he was ashamed of it. I knew it would take time for him to get used to expressing himself freely. I was willing to wait as long as I had to.
“How was the interview?” I asked almost instantly as I noticed him hiding behind the wall.
“Don’t care. I just want the job to help you out.”
“You should be a little more excited about it though. You would help people.”
“Good point, still, the interviewers were odd.”
“In what way?”
“They asked me to transform in my cat form. It was awkward.”
“Oh, Yoongi.” I cooed at him, which made him scoff “I read about the interviews on the internet, they always work like this. Want to find out you’re not just faking it or something, they will pay you well there, but really, if you don’t want to do it…”
“No, I want to. They said they would call me back.”
“On another note. I’m going away on the weekend to my parents.”
“Oh. What should I wear?”
There was a long, uncomfortable silence following his question. I tried to nonchalantly put away my jacket and boots while going to my room to find my most comfortable outfit and my pyjamas in which I will be at Rae’s place, while Yoongi followed me intuitively wherever I went. I had this hunch that he was paying close attention to everything I did, which made me a little uneasy.
“I’m going alone.” I blurted out finally when I couldn’t stand the silence anymore.
I turned around to find him closer to me, looking at me blankly, like he just didn’t care about what would happen. He shrugged his shoulders, saying that it was fine, though I quickly started to emphasise that it will be just for lunch or dinner and I would be back on the same day. He hopped onto my bed and yawned loudly, touching his ear slightly while looking away.
“And now? Where are you going?”
“Yep.” it was silent for a moment, at least until he suddenly started to go off.
“I don’t like this at all Yuu, you always leave me home and meet your friends alone. Okay, I can’t go to your uni, that’s plausible, still sounds unfair, but okay, I get it. But why can’t I come when you meet your friends? Or family?”
“Yoongi they don’t know about you being a shifter.”
He stared at me without saying anything. I knew sooner or later I would have to tell him, but truthfully, it would have been better if it was later. And not right now when I was about to sleep at my friend’s house, so I couldn’t even explain myself well, or cuddle him to sleep.
I sat down next to him, and even though I saw him grunt a little I held his hand in mine, fully aware that he had every right to be mad at me. I would too. But at the same time, I knew my family and friends better than him. I was sure they wouldn’t accept it easily that I am the owner of a shifter, I didn’t even tell them about the hybrid friends I had in the past, afraid of their reaction. I wasn’t thinking straight about this whole situation, not comprehending if what I do is good or bad.
“I’m not sure they would be too pleased about it. Over time I will tell them, but…” I took a deep breath before proceeding “Be patient, please.”
“Okay.” he muttered bringing my hand closer to his face “Whatever.”
“Aren’t you mad?”
“No, it would be useless. I get what situation you are in and I know I was selfish.”
“What? No, no, at all! You are not selfish at all Yoongi, you’re actually such a selfless person.”
“You talk about me like I'm human.”
“You’re a special kind of human.”
I was smiling brightly at him, while he scented my hand then dropped it in his lap. He stretched out his limbs, zoning out. I knew he would probably just mind his own business, so I made dinner for the upcoming days when I noticed we were all out of milk. With a heavy sigh, I rolled my eyes, being somewhat angry that he was drinking milk like it was water. I noted in my head that I have to talk with him about this habit of his because milk wasn't the cheapest out there and if he wanted to see the daylight he should stop drinking with one carton a day.
When I was done I took a quick shower, seeing that I was almost late. Yoongi was napping in his human form on his bed, silver hair in his face, curling up in fetus position with both hands tucked away between his legs. With careful steps, I approached him intending to pet his hair, but he slowly opened his eyes before I could pet him.
“Oh shit, thought you were a deep sleeper.”
“Your scent is stronger than usual,” he mumbled still half asleep.
It took all my strength not to jump on him and hug him as hard as I could because he looked like a small child right now. His eyes were half-closed, cheeks a little puffy, but still, he looked almost as skinny as he was when I met him. He pouted, gingerly rubbing his eyes, trying to wake up fully, but before he could I started to caress his hair. He licked his lips while leaning into my touch, shamelessly purring out of delight.
“I'm actually late. You have dinner in the oven when it's cold please put it in the fridge and don't eat it all. I know you mostly eat out of boredom.”
“I feel profusely attacked and for what reason?” he sighed when I started rubbing behind his ears.
“For being bored. I'm going, goodnight.”
We got incredibly drunk together with her flatmate, so in the end, we threw a sort of mini party at their place, with loud music, pyjamas and alcohol. I was laughing so obnoxiously at everything, even my tears started to stream down my face, while Rae giggled on the floor because of my behaviour. The series that we wanted to watch together was long forgotten, while we danced in Rae's room to Just Dance V. I didn't have this much fun in a while with them, so at 3 AM we were up and dancing like some idiots. I forgot completely about my phone, I only remembered when we decided to go to bed because my head started to hurt. I was laying next to Rae, both of us getting ready to be on our phones for the next half an hour until we sobered up enough to actually fall asleep.
I opened up my phone and my stomach automatically clenched. I blinked a few times, not sure if I was hallucinating because of all the wine. I had a few messages from Yoongi, nothing unusual.
Hey, just ate, I left you a lot so you won't complain.
It's in the fridge.
Going to sleep bye bye. Have fun there.
I wrote back to him, checking all of my spelling mistakes before sending it, but my eyes were almost all through writing glued to another message that I still haven't read.
Hey… I know this is weird and all but I'm just back in town. Can we see each other? Hope I didn't wake u up.
I swallowed down my worry, but it was still there. Unmistakably, it was Jimin. It was his number even though I deleted it a few months ago. I still knew it by heart, since we talked so much it automatically stuck with me, and now, suddenly I felt like crying. A lump on my throat was forming quickly, and Rae noticed the change in my mood, even if we didn't talk.
“Jimin is back in town.”
She quickly got up from bed, sitting and staring at me, not believing what I just said. Honestly, I wouldn't even believe myself if I was in her place, so I showed her the message. I saw her eyes hurriedly reading it multiple times before handing me my phone back, shocked expression evident on her face.
“What the fuck?”
“I don't know.” I mumbled blinking back the tears that were slowly welling up in my eyes “What should I do?”
“You are asking me this?” she scoffed, head falling on the palm of her hand “What do you want to do?”
“No idea. I'm feeling so confused now.”
“Cause you're drunk. Fuck, what the hell does he even want from you?”
“Fuck if I know! He wants to meet. Maybe talk?”
“Well, the fucker has a lot of explaining to do that's for sure.”
“What? You damn know I'm right.”
“I know. I, uh, will see tomorrow when we wake up and get over the hang.” she started to chuckle over my lame attempt of joking.
“Fine, come on, it's already late anyway.”
Was it a bad decision to ignore Jimin’s text for a whole week? Probably. Actually, it was, but I shat my pants and couldn’t find the right words to tell him how I felt. In fact, I had no idea what I wanted to do, was I really that interested in his explanation? Would he give me one, to begin with? Why would he suddenly just text me out of nowhere like nothing happened? Why did he have to come back now, that my plate was full of other things?
These types of questions popped into my head almost every damned day, and I felt like my mind was ready to burst from overthinking. I kept myself busy with everything that I could think of, cleaning the house, studying for university, going to all of my classes including the practical ones, cooking much more than it was necessary. My head was jumbled with thoughts and it weirdly affected my life, though I haven’t noticed it. Not until Yoongi grabbed my arm and sat me down on his bed, looking at me with a somewhat worried expression.
“What is up with you?”
“What do you mean?”
“You may be good at hiding things from others but I’m not a human. I could pick up on your distress and it’s already creeping me out. I couldn’t properly sleep yesterday.”
I looked away, knowing already that I was busted. Of course, how could I forget about him being a shifter? I got so used to him walking around in his human form for the past couple of days that my mind deleted this crucial information. He was probably affected more by my minor headache, so for once I actually took a deep breath and slowed down my mind as much as possible. He was still staring at me waiting for an explanation, details about my worries that I didn't like to think about at all, but the thoughts still crept into my mind.
“I’m sorry, I forgot how it would affect you too.”
“Doesn’t matter, what’s going on? Something with the uni?”
“No, it’s… someone from my past reached out to me. Don’t know if I should meet them or not.”
“Why wouldn’t you?”
I looked at Yoongi. He pressed his lips together then formed a small pout when he noticed my facial expression. It must have been pretty awful.
“They hurt me.”
“They might explain themselves though.”
“Why are you so fucking complicated? Just go already and stop being a scaredy-cat!”
The wordplay left me laughing on his bed with a loudly. He only sighed, but a giggle still escaped his lips. These days he seemed more comfortable than usual, showing his emotions, and the fact that he literally cracked a joke in this situation made me suddenly forget all about my worries including Jimin.
In the end, we fully dodged the topic and decided to watch a movie, since we didn’t have anything else to do on a Friday morning. I didn’t have any classes, and he would just laze around anyway, so I bought out my laptop from my room and left him to search for a movie, while I checked the cupboard for any snacks, when I noticed something. Or should I say, I noticed the absence of something, and that would be the four cartons of milk that I bought a few days ago. With a heavy sigh, I called him in the kitchen, it was now or never. He came in perplexed, but his eyes widened as soon as he saw my finger-pointing in the cupboard.
“Explain. You have 30 seconds.”
“Wow. Someone is stealing all your milk.”
“Yoongi I don’t have anything to drink my coffee with now!”
“Don’t worry, I will find the culprit and make sure that they pay!” he had a kind smile on his face, one that couldn’t allow me to be mad at him anymore.
“I hate you so much.”
“You love me.”
He smirked, cocky as ever, that was until I ruffled his hair, earning a loud purring from him. When I wanted to take my hand away he leaned in a little bit, averting my eyes. I took all the cuddling to his bed while we watched the movie. I gave up too early on the milk topic, it was getting ridiculous at this point, but what could I do? He always pulled the cute smile on me, because surely he knew that I was whipped for him.
We were already halfway through the movie when his phone started to ring. That was weird, I didn’t even know somebody has his phone number, but the fact that he almost jumped on it made me even more anxious. I was chewing on my bottom lip, watching him intently as he walked away from the living room in the kitchen, closing the door behind him. I paused the movie while trying to eavesdrop to his conversation, but I couldn't hear anything from this distance. Sneaking to the door I pressed my ear against it, squinting my eyes as if that would help me hear him better. I almost fell in the kitchen when he opened up the door staring at me with a funny facial expression. My face became flushed.
“You're loud,” he commented walking past me to sit back on his bed.
“Who was it?”
“From work. I'm starting on Monday.”
“Oh my God, that's wonderful! Aren't you excited?”
His tone was his usual self, no emotion whatsoever in it. I pouted at his antics. We were completely different and it was fairly obvious, so I let it go and concentrated on the movie. Later on, I got a message from Rae, asking if I talked with Jimin yet. Of course, I didn't but I was too afraid to tell her the truth so I ignored her message.
I knew I needed to gather up some courage so after showering I made a bold move and wrote him a swift message that we could meet sometime next week if he's free. I wasn't expecting an answer right away, let alone a call. My heart started pounding like crazy in my chest when I looked at my phone and saw him calling me. I panicked immediately, my breathing becoming ragged by the minute. What was I supposed to do? Answer him? This suddenly? It seemed hopeless. But I knew what I had to do. With a deep breath, I answered.
It seemed like my heart stopped for a second when I heard his soft whisper from the other end of the phone. So many memories flooded my mind, one after another, making me forget to answer properly. I didn't even realize how my palms became sweaty from the small stress I was under.
Thankfully my voice sounded decently strict and flowy like I was completely normal when in reality I was munching on my upper and lower lip simultaneously.
“Sorry to call you so suddenly. Can we meet next week around the weekend? I still have some things to do.”
“Fine. Saturday at 3pm?”
The question seemed innocent enough, but it made my heart drop until my stomach. I replied with a slightly unsure “okay” and after that we ended the call and I was left more confused than ever. I fixated my closet without even blinking like I just made a promise with the devil. Covering my face with both of my hands seemed pitiful but I needed to breathe if I didn't want to suddenly have a panic attack, even though I could feel it already creeping up on me.
I almost yelped when I heard a loud meow from the other side of the door. For a second I forgot about him entirely, too immersed in my thoughts.
I didn't open up the door right away. I had to make sure my face was decent enough, but as soon as I looked in the mirror I realized there's no use to hiding anything from him. My face was pale, lips chapped and my breathing slightly shaky. I had no idea one short conversation would leave me like this.
More meowing and a slight scratch on the door. With a sigh I slowly walked to open it up, though when I looked outside Yoongi was already in his human form, looking at me with an uncertain expression.
“I talked with the person I told you about.”
“I'm not sure I will let you leave if they're making you this anxious.” he scoffed, looking deeply into my eyes.
“I was surprised. It's okay now.”
“Such a bad liar.” he leaned in a little brushing my hair out of my face “You have anxiety all over you.”
“It will pass.” as it always did.
“Want me to help?”
This left me a little startled. How in the world could he help me in any shape or form, I had no idea, but he seemed so confident in himself that I shrugged and nodded. Anything was better than this state that I was in right now.
“You can put it on me.”
“Put what?” I furrowed my eyebrows, not getting what he was talking about.
“You seriously need to read between the lines, it's making me exasperated!”
“Oh my God, wait! Are you talking about what I think you're talking about?”
He looked unamused, silently nodding. This instantly made me excited, leaving him in front of my door to run to my closet. I opened it up searching for the cute item I bought not too long ago for him. It was an adorable pink silk ribbon made for cats. When I first showed it to him he was scoffing and refused to talk to me almost for a whole day. I tried telling him how lovely he would look with it, but he was impossible to persuade, so I put it away in the back of my closet with the intention that I would force him to wear it anyway one day. And the day has come faster than he would have liked.
Yoongi was in his kitten form, looking at me with a blank stare from the floor, sitting patiently, acting like this was the most horrendous day of his life. I sat down on the rug, softly petting his head while putting the ribbon around his neck. He blinked a few times at me with his huge, golden eyes that completely made me lose it. I cooed and awed loudly, bringing my phone to take a dozen pictures of him. He still patiently watched me while I had a major breakdown over how endearing he looked in it. I quickly changed my home screen to him and showed it in front of his face.
“See? Told you it would look good on you!”
He turned around to walk away from me but I sneakily grabbed him from behind and snuggled him closer to my face. I could hear him purring but it was faint, so now my mission was to make him purr happily too in my bed. I gently placed him next to me and laid down. It was noon but the conversation with Jimin drained me down emotionally, I needed to take a short power nap.
“It seems like forever since you slept here.”
I mumbled caressing his soft fur. He licked my hand, purring in content next to me. I had no idea what was he thinking about but I slept soundly with a smile on my face.
Somehow the days went by with the speed of light, and Saturday arrived far too early for my liking. Yoongi was the best flatmate I could ask for, we talked and laughed a lot in this past couple of days, even though I had to go to uni and he started to work, we always found time for each other. He refused to wear the collar I gave him unless we went out to shop or just take a fast walk in a park, which was rare because let’s be honest, the snow was cold, the wind was strong and we liked to stay inside much more.
Everything was going perfectly fine until he sat me down Thursday night for a talk. Now, everyone knows how these talks go, usually not that well, so I was prepared for the worst as I watched him squirm in his seat. He said he’ll have to go away for three days starting from tomorrow morning but refused to tell me why and where. I was confused, but I trusted him so I told him to be safe and I guess, he should have a good trip. He has been here for almost a month now and I got so used to his presence that when Friday arrived and I was home all alone I had literally the time of my life.
I liked living alone before and with him too, but now that the whole apartment was mine after I came home from uni I just stripped down to a single shirt and my panties and walked around like a queen. I even invited Rae over, telling her that my cat was at the vet, which she believed easily. Before she arrived I put his stuff away and when she looked with a questionable expression on her face to the sofa that was made like a bed I shrugged it off.
We binge-watched Game of Thrones until morning and she stayed until we had breakfast. I enjoyed talking with her and lazing around because finally, my mind was off from the fact that only in a few hours I will meet up with Jimin.
“Okay, listen up hoe. You need to be impeccable, you hear me? He needs to see how perfect you are, how composed you are, and-”
“Rae, I’m already all of these things combined, what else do you want me to be like?”
“Honestly nothing, you’re already the best. Just slay his ass, okay?”
“Sure thing.” I started to move my leg under the table out of pure stress “Urgh, I really shouldn’t meet him.”
“Yes you should and you will. Don’t back out now, you need answers, don’t you? He’s not the type to lie.”
“Are you sure about that?”
There was a small silence between us. She sighed, playing with her locks, deciding in the end to avoid my question.
“You’ll do fine. He’s just Jimin, a guy out of your life for like how much time now?”
“Almost a year.”
“Exactly, so buckle up hoe, you have nothing to be afraid of. You don’t even like him anymore, do you?”
“Of course I don’t.”
I scoffed. It wasn’t about me liking him, it was the answers that I was afraid of. We go way back and to think that everything between us ended so miserably made me slightly sad.
After Rae left I got ready for my meeting with Jimin. I decided to wear something simple, a black turtleneck that looked like it was my second skin, it was so tight, and black jeans until my bellybutton. My purple hair was out with some soft curls in them and a basic makeup with red lipstick. I checked my phone one last time before going out, I had almost half an hour to get there and no messages from Yoongi yet. My stomach flipped at the thought that something bad might have happened with him but I was sure everything was fine, besides, we didn’t agree that he would message me. He was an adult just like I was, I’m sure he was having fun somewhere, maybe with colleagues.
I took a bus until the centre of the city, which was pretty much filled. I instantly saw the hotel we would usually go and eat, so I made my way towards it between the people and the trees. Everything was fully white outside, exactly like out of a dream, and the snow didn’t seem like it wanted to stop anytime soon.
The diamond logo in front of the hotel was almost blinding while I made my way inside. I said hello to the staff and walked towards the restaurant that was always open to guests. Right now only a few tables were occupied and I had no idea if Jimin arrived yet or not. I stopped near the desk where a staff member from the hotel usually greeted the visitors at night and asked if they made a reservation, but right now it was only lunchtime so there was no one there.
I looked around until I saw him. It wasn’t that hard, to be honest. Most of the people here looked around their 40’s, eating alone or with their family or another elder looking woman, while Jimin was all alone, barely close to his 30’s, wearing a full white suit with vest and all. Everything looked neat and tidy, ironed to the gods, only his cravat was black with small white dots on it. His hair was of a lighter shade than I remembered, but he still looked the same.
I quickly checked my phone, he didn’t text me.
I had to take a few deep breaths before I walked to him, looking like some sort of kid next to him. He must have heard someone coming closer because he turned from the window and let down his hand that he was resting his chin on. As soon as he recognized me he got up from his seat eagerly and pulled the chair next to him slightly out, so I could sit down.
“You look lovely as always,” he said in a low tone.
My stomach made another flip, I wasn’t sure I could eat anything. I just wanted to get out of my jacket, but he was already gingerly helping me, putting it on the back of my chair.
“Stop with compliments.”
“You never really liked them, did you?”
“Of course I did, but only if they were honest.” I looked at him with a deadpanned expression, making sure that he got the hint, and from the look he gave me, I was sure he understood.
“You have every right to be angry at me.”
“Do I look mad to you?” I asked in the calmest voice.
“Yes, fearfully so.”
“I already ordered for us.”
“How do you know I would like it? Stop controlling everything Jimin.”
“I’m sorry, it’s a bad habit, I just got so used to it I-”
He stopped talking because the waiter arrived with our food. The portion looked dreadfully small compared to the price I would have to pay for this crab pasta with some leaves in it, but I knew this is the best dish here and Jimin knew it too. Fuck, he really did remember it even after a year of us being apart.
The waiter poured me a glass of water and poured some in Jimin’s too then left us to be alone yet again. I could barely hear the soft music playing in the backround from how loudly my heart was pounding in my ears. I grabbed my fork and spoon and started to slowly dig in, I was hungry even though my stomach shrunk considerably.
“So what were you up to until now? May I know now why you suddenly left for a year without telling me or I should just sort of go with the flow?”
I knew my voice was sharp, but I let it slide. I wasn’t holding back, I needed these answers so I can move on with my life peacefully. He smiled dryly, putting down his fork and knife in elegant motion. For a moment he swept his hair backwards, before opening his mouth.
“Anie I know you’re pissed.”
“I made a big mistake that will probably haunt me for the rest of my life. I shouldn’t have left you just like that, it was an immature move from my part and you can always spit in my face for it, I deserve it. I got afraid and it took me this much time to think things through.” he stopped for a second, but I was only staring at him, so he continued “It was also a business trip, but the trip only took three months. After that, I was too much of a coward to come back, and that wasn’t the real reason I decided to go anyway.”
“I hate it when you talk in riddles,” I whispered putting more pasta in my mouth.
“I should have told you this back then. I loved you.”
My heart stopped for a second while my mouth automatically munched on the food. I was sure I heard it right but it was still unbelievable for me. It suddenly felt far too hot inside, I wanted to get out as fast as possible, but then again I would do the same thing he did to me one year ago. I swallowed the bite and looked at him. His expression was indecipherable while he looked deep into my eyes.
“I don’t know what to say. Really.” I replied in a soft voice.
“Then let me talk. I knew what I was doing was bad, what we were doing was bad. We never agreed to go this far, two dinners a week and that’s all. I just-” he swept his hair back again, that’s when I noticed his lips slightly trembling “I guess we both made a mistake by having sex too. Multiple times. It was more than a contract by that point. And when I started to notice the real you, I fell for you.”
“Well dammit, wouldn’t have been easier to just fucking tell me?” I asked, fighting back my tears “I was feeling the same way. It wasn’t just for money anymore and you know it! I refused every little thing you got me because I liked being in your company, even if we just talked. Even if it was for free.”
“The fuck you know Park Jimin? All you know is that you left without telling me anything. I texted and called you like a lunatic only to find out from the internet that, ups, the famous chief editor was out and about in New Zealand. I cried for months after your sorry ass.”
I had to compose myself before we continued, but for that, I definitely needed a breather. I stopped eating and drank all the water, praying that my tears will suddenly go away before he notices them. Just thinking about how much I suffered because of him made me relive all those bad memories. I refused to think he had to go through the same shit I did.
“You can punch me, or just leave me here. I don’t care, I just wanted to explain myself and give you some clarity, you can go on with your life however you like.” he bit his lower lip, suddenly looking much younger and fragile than before “I wanted to say I love you, even if it’s the last thing I do.”
I stayed put, not knowing what to do. My emotions were a mess and all I knew is that I needed to get away from him to think this through. Before I could respond anything, he opened his mouth and said something that nearly made me fall off from my chair.
“It might be selfish but I still want to talk to you and start a new relationship this time. Not a contract, a real one.”
“I don’t know Jimin. You hurt me far too much.” I replied sighing while putting my face in my hands.
“Think about it and get back to me, okay? If you won’t, that would be an answer for me too. I’ll wait.”
This was like a goodbye for me, so I gathered my things and was ready to leave but he insisted on taking me home. Reluctantly I agreed, waiting outside while he paid for our meal. The ride was silent and full with tension, I couldn’t wait to get out from his car, and as soon as he stopped I thanked for the ride and opened up the door, not even looking back at him. I nearly fell several times on the ground because I sprinted towards my apartment, not wanting to feel his eyes on me anymore. I didn’t even make it until my door, I was already a sobbing mess. Thank God Yoongi wasn’t home, otherwise it would have been really awkward to tell him how it went.
I dropped angrily everything on the floor, my bag, my shoes and even my jacket. I didn’t care about them, I just cried loudly letting all the pent up emotions leave me. I grabbed a toilet paper and blew my nose several times, it must have taken me at least an hour before I completely calmed down and was ready to call Rae about what happened. Sadly, as soon as she picked up I started to silently weep again, so next thing I knew we were talking for hours on the phone while I took the longest bath in history.
Seeing him again, listening to what he said made something in me move, something I thought was long ago dead. I refused to believe my emotions for him caught on fire again, and I wasn’t sure it would be a good idea to start over from zero yet again. Suddenly I felt extremely lonely, I even took out Yoongi’s collar and watched our photos together, not one taken in his human form. He hated these, but honestly, I had no idea why. I missed talking with him now, his calm aura that was soothing for me, even though sometimes we were just sitting together watching a movie in silence.
Because he didn’t arrive only later on Monday, I had time to gather myself up from the floor and do some university related stuff. Most of the time I was free, so I wrote a bunch of articles for my upcoming project. Yoongi was already home, unpacked, in his cat form when I arrived home Monday.
I tackled him, hugging him close to my face and rubbing him underneath his chin. He started to purr loudly yawning right in my face.
“Transform, I want to talk.” he glared at me and didn’t move “Come on Yoongi, I missed you, I wanna talk.~”
I could imagine him cussing in his mind but as I turned around I could feel him poking my back with his index finger.
“You forgot to buy milk.” he sounded tired, exhausted even.
“And you forgot to find the culprit who drank it all. Maybe if you find him there will be milk.”
“I hate you.”
I worriedly touched his locks, his lips were puffy and red, eyes were swollen from not sleeping and overall he looked horrible.
“Were you in a boot camp or something?”
“Sort of. Can we talk after you know, I sleep?”
“Gosh, you’re horrible. Go on then, I will do some paperwork. Knock on my door when you’re done dying.”
He smirked at me before falling back into his bed like a lifeless doll, and incredibly enough, he was already softly snoring.
To say that I was having one of the worst week of my life was an understatement. After the meeting with Jimin, I needed a breather, which mostly meant doing all of my assignments, even though most of them were necessary by the end of the semester, going outside sometimes for hours, doing nothing else than walking around in parks and the centre of the city.
My schedule with Yoongi's pretty much clashed most of the time, but that didn’t mean our friendship would collapse just because of this. The one thing I love the most about him is, how he never asked me about the date with Jimin. He probably didn’t need to, by now he knew me more than I would like to admit, so he sort of just went with the flow and did his thing and that's exactly what I needed right now.
However, my mind was filled with Jimin these days yet again. I have no idea if this was his intention or not, but he was there nonetheless. It was around 2 AM when I got tired of not being able to fall asleep. Inaudibly I went to the kitchen and did the only thing I could think about, get all the ingredients to make a chocolate chip filled cake. Yoongi was soundly sleeping in his bed in his human form. For the past weeks, he’s rather walking around like this, since this was the only way we could talk anyway.
With earphones on, I started to search for a receipt on Pinterest, which took almost an eternity, since I got distracted several times, so by the time I actually found one receipt it was almost 3 AM. I began to gather everything while softly humming an upbeat melody, getting rid of Jimin’s face every time it appeared in my mind, that was until I sensed somebody watching me. Of course, only the two of us lived here, so it would be a big problem if suddenly we would be raided with ghosts.
I turned around to see a sleepy-looking Yoongi, silver hair sticking out in every possible direction, eyes slowly blinking, trying to comprehend slowly what was going on. He wore the same white shirt he always did when he went to bed and red flannel pants that were hanging low on his waist. I grinned at him after taking out my headphones from my ears, I must have been a sight to see.
“It’s 4 AM why are you baking a cake?”
“I’m celebrating the death of my sleep schedule and sanity. Want one when it’s done?”
“You need help, sit down for a second.”
“I’m perfectly fine, sorry to wake you up though.”
“Hey, hey, what are-”
Before I could get mad at him, he took my hands and sat me down on the kitchen chair. I was pouting at him waiting for an explanation as to why he interfered with my cooking, but he opened up the fridge only to groan loudly.
“No milk. Still.”
“It’s in the ingredients.” he glared at me for a second before sitting on the kitchen counter looking at me with a deadpanned expression “Talk.”
“Why do I suddenly feel like I’m a dog?”
“By all means, you would be a cat, not a dog.”
“How considerate of you to-”
“Yuu I don’t have all night for you, my cat senses are telling me you’re not alright.”
“Fine, don’t need to come at me this hard.” I sighed putting down the batter that I was still holding in my hand “I met up with the person and he told me some things that made me mad. And hurt.”
“Who the hell is this person anyway? An ex or what?”
“Sort of but not really. It’s more difficult than that. He wants to start all over.”
“What?” he sighed and looked at me in a way that said I should read between the lines, so I did “No idea. He hurt me far too much.”
“You still like him. It's obvious. Just start and see what will happen.” he got up from his seat like he just ended a war “Now go to sleep. You can continue cooking tomorrow morning.”
“Thank you Yoongi.”
I got up too and went to give him a hug, which he reciprocated clumsily. He sniffed my neck a few times, then softly let go of me to get back to sleep. I guess in a way he was right, that’s why I chose to just take a fucking break from all of my thoughts and go with the flow for once. I texted Jimin the next day that we should try to work things out between us again, and I was precisely telling him this was his last chance because I don’t have time to fuck around with fools. He responded almost instantly and told me I won’t regret it, which I doubted, though I wanted to be positive about all of this.
We messaged each other when we had time, though I made sure not to seem too over-excited about all of this. We talked with Rae about going out to party this weekend, something we didn’t do in what seemed like months, and I was more than happy to get drunk and dance my ass off with my friends. We made the group chat one day before, while I was in one of my classes. We decided on the alcohol and where should we get wasted which made me all pumped up.
Right after my class, I went outside while talking with my classmate who will also come with us, when I stopped dead in my track. She looked back at me with a confused expression evident on her face. I told her to go on because I had some things to take care of, so she brushed it off, gave me a quick hug and went on to go home, while I hid behind a tree watching intently the car. Black Rolls Royce with tinted windows, possibly the newest model, since almost everyone stopped near the car to take a picture of it or just stare at it for a few seconds, before walking away with a frown on their face. It seemed familiar, and for fuck’s sake, of course it was, that was the car that I was sitting in on the weekend with Jimin. There was no way he would come here, would be?
“Who are we hiding from?”
The voice sent shivers down my spine. I turned around faster than the speed of light to see Jimin in front of me with a smirk on his face and a huge bouquet of roses in his hand. They were all bloody red, it looked right out of a movie, so obviously, my heart started to beat faster in my chest.
“What a beautiful answer. Here, accidentally found them on the street.” he handed me the flowers which I took with a small smile. It was so typical of him.
“And I’m guessing a random person knew my name too,” I answered while taking out the small card that had my name on it.
“Busted I guess.” he laughed with a big mouth, trying to hide it with his hand.
He looked dashing with the dark blue suit, an elegant black coat that went until his knees and a fiery red scarf around his neck.
“Are you free? We could go eat something.”
“If you have other plans we can rearrange the date.” he smiled kindly, eyes forming a crescent moon.
“No, no, we can go.”
In the beginning, it was awkward, but after the first 20 minutes somehow I got loose and could talk properly like a normal human being. I arrived home later than anticipated, and I only realized this when I opened the door and Yoongi was right in front of me slightly pouting. Chuckling at his cute antics I showed him a carton of milk that I bought for only him, but he seemed far more interested in the flowers I got from Jimin. He narrowed his eyes, slowly coming closer to smell it, then looked at it with disgust.
“What is it? You don’t like the smell of roses?”
“I don’t like the smell of this guy.” he said while hugging me and brushing his face next to my neck “It’s weird.”
“Cologne?” I asked not even bothered by him scenting me at this point.
“No, it’s something else.” he mumbled after he scented me, a proud smile creeping on his face “It’s better now.”
“Are you going to do this every time?”
“I will go out to a party this weekend.”
“Just say you don’t want to be with me anymore and go.”
“Stop being so overdramatic Yoongs, I can’t exactly bring you with me.”
“Why not?” I looked at him sceptically before finding a vase for the flowers “Okay, you’re right, I would hate it.”
“I’m sure. But I was thinking about going to your workplace next week. I want to see how is it.”
“I’m getting paid next week.”
Talking with him reminded me of how it was almost March. Has he been really working at that place for this long? Time really is flying here, too bad the weather still seems the same. The days really did go by without me noticing how it was almost my mom’s birthday. I talked with them about how we should celebrate it and decided to eat home, at their place, gathering the small family around us. They told me to bring my cat too so he wouldn’t feel lonely, and when Yoongi heard this he was smiling big. He was so excited he even forgave me for leaving him alone for a night.
I arrived home after the party almost dead. I reeked of alcohol and I was still pretty much wasted, though I knew I had to get home since it was almost 6 AM and I could barely feel my legs. I tipped the taxi driver generously and somehow made my way up until our door. Searching for a key seemed harder than it should be, and it didn’t help that I was almost freezing in the corridor, wearing only a mini skirt, a loose top and my winter jacket which was unbuttoned.
I cursed under my breath when I finally found it. The door moved slightly, so I tried my best to hit in the hole several times when abruptly I heard the lock being opened from inside. The door swung open revealing an irritated-looking Yoongi. He quickly pinched his nose, still trying to somehow get me inside. With a loud thud I could hear the door being shut, Yoongi not even bothering right now to properly lock it with his keys.
“Jesus, did you drown in vodka?”
“Kinda.” I sneered thinking about how funny that would be.
“You’re going to take a hot shower. Right now. Oh my God, you’re freezing too. Fucking idiot.”
He helped me get out of my jacket, but I pushed him away stumbling over to the bathroom. I got out of my shirt and skirt opening the water. I climbed in the bathtub and got out of my undergarments tossing them on the floor. I clumsily put my hair in a bun, when I heard the bathroom door closed. Yoongi was outside, doing who knows what, while I took a shower. I thought it would help me sober up a little, but all it did was make my head feel dizzier. Pouting I put the towel around me and got out of the bathroom. Yoongi was in my room and gave me my pyjamas but refused to find my knickers. I laughed at him being this shy and dressed up.
“Yoongo.” he scoffed loudly at his nickname “I’m hungry.”
“Oh no, you’re the hungry drunk.”
“Hmpf, and the horny one.”
“You could have just left that information out.” he sighed loudly, still pinching his nose “Your scent is too strong again. Are you ovulating?”
“The hell would I know?”
“Well, I know.”
“How does it smell like?” I asked, suddenly interested in it. I have never questioned him about this before, and being drunk made all my barriers crumble to the floor.
“We are not having this conversation now.” he was ready to leave my room but I clung onto his arm not letting it go.
“When else then? You never tell me anything. Is it that bad though?”
“No, I mean yes, but-” he whined a little getting his arm out of my grip “It’s just. . . inviting.”
“Do I really have to spell it out for you?”
“You don’t talk about sex, are you?”
“That’s exactly what I’m talking about.” I chuckled at his shyness, but he remained frustrated “Not funny, your smell is everywhere in the house, I should take some pills.”
“No way!” I shook my head frantically “That would fuck up your system.”
“It wouldn’t. I already got a prescription from Clara, I will get the medicine tomorrow. Besides, it’s normal, it’s like a vitamin or something.”
I silently looked at him through my drunken haze. I felt a lot of emotions now but decided to not act upon any of them. He was leaning on my door, looking at me with an unreadable expression while I just stood still, staring back. I didn’t know why I felt so sad about him not telling me any of this. We were friends, weren’t we? And in my dictionary friends were supposed to tell each other these things, so Yoongi telling me how he reached out to Clara sooner than to me left me feeling like he just cheated.
I sighed wandering to the kitchen, not even looking in his direction. I could feel him walking right after me, and when I looked at the reflection of the microwave, sure enough, he was already in his cat form, sitting at the top of the table. I had no idea why he felt so distant out of the sudden.
I took out some food and started to eat silently, my emotions flew high up in the sky, already feeling like crying, while Yoongi curled up in a ball, like a little fluff, and stared right at me. I sobbed out of nowhere, probably frightening him because while I put away the food I suddenly felt his presence again near me. Before I could turn around he hugged me from behind, putting his head on my shoulder, softly purring.
“I’m sorry,” he mumbled inaudibly in my neck, making me slightly hiccup.
“Why? Y-you didn’t do anything.”
He didn’t answer my question, just led me into my bedroom and helped me lay down in my bed. Tiredness washed all over me again when I felt the soft fabric of my pillow under my face, and the warm duvet on my body. I started to breathe softly, drifting off to sleep, while Yoongi walked out of my room quietly closing the door behind him.
The next day I felt like pure shit, clearly, the alcohol was out of my system, but the bad feeling of yesterday remained. I haven’t talked with Yoongi almost all day, I cowardly stayed in my bedroom, more importantly in my bed, avoiding all contact with him, because I was afraid of how I made things awkward again yesterday. I really acted like a spoiled brat, and now that I had a sober mind I realized this a little too late. Though I started to get thirsty and hungry fast, I refused to go out, because I was stubborn, but Yoongi was having none of it. He barged into my room without knocking, a cup of something hot in one hand and a plate of food in another. I looked at him with an unamused expression, putting down my phone on the nightstand, while he stared down at me pathetically.
“Thought you might be dead here. You survived though.”
He walked towards me and put down the plate then handed me the mug, which was filled with my favourite coffee and milk. My heart melted at this sight. He truly went out of his way to make me a simple breakfast with toast, boiled eggs, cheese and sausage, even though it didn’t look appetizing at all the thought counted much more to me.
“Thank you,” I mumbled before taking a sip of the coffee.
“Will you come to the pharmacy with me?”
“Of course. Will you wear the cute pink ribbon?” he pouted at me, cheeks becoming puffy out of frustration.
“Fine. But I like the black one better.”
“Don’t worry, I was thinking about buying you a new one anyway.”
“Will it be pink again?”
The mood was back to normal yet again, he bought the vitamins for himself, and he almost took one pill immediately when we went outside. He still refused to tell me how I smelled like, but I let it go because I saw how uncomfortable he was from this topic. The old woman told Yoongi that he should take a maximum of two pills a day, no more than that because even though it was a vitamin, it could still cause some disturbance in his system.
The weekend was full with us laying around in different parts of the apartment, watching serials and movies one after another until he passed out, then I had to actually do something productive. University stuff was boring, at least the reading and assignment parts, otherwise, I enjoyed it, since I was learning about editing, which interested me since I was a small kid. I always liked writing, but my true dream was to work for a huge magazine and write to them about various articles. It seemed more like a dream, but I didn’t give up on it, even when everyone around me told me to just let it go, because it wouldn’t pay me enough.
Thinking about my negative past experiences put me in a somewhat bad mood, so I had to call Rae, my number one supporter. She always knew how to get me out of this bad headspace, so chatting with her for two hours made me feel much better.
I almost had a mini heart attack when I heard my phone ring while talking with Rae. It was Jimin. He just called to ask me how I was doing and if I was free next week to go to have a special dinner with him. I had an idea what he meant so I agreed, already feeling excited about him taking me out to a place, and generally seeing him again. I had no idea I missed his presence so much, only now that I talked with him so frequently.
It was on a Wednesday night, so I decided to pay Yoongi a visit at his workplace before starting to get ready for the date. The building looked friendly enough, which was a big plus in my eyes, but when I entered the facility, it was then that I felt really at ease. The receptionists were kind and patient with me when I explained that I was the owner of Yoongi, which made me slightly cringe inside when I actually said it out loud and asked them where could I find him. They explained to me that he was with patients now, and showed me to a room full of smaller kids that came from the hospital not too long ago. I barely heard them when they started to tell me how these kids came here, and why they had to be hospitalized in the first place because my eyes were glued on Yoongi. He wore the pink silk ribbon around his neck, playing around with two kids in his cat form. I never saw him this happy, and could never have imagined him playing around with kids, since he always looked so passive-aggressive towards everything, sometimes including me.
I smiled softly at him rolling around on the rug and said goodbye to the receptionists thanking them for showing me around. My heart felt full of adoration for him, never noticed how my cheeks were red when I went outside to go home.
I arrived late after the date, another bouquet of flowers in my hand and a big bag with chocolates in the other. Yoongi was sleeping soundly in his bed, so I did my best to be as quiet as possible, but I wasn’t too surprised when I left the bathroom he was scenting the flowers and the chocolate that I left in the kitchen.
“Hey, Yoongo. You said you like the black ribbon better.” I said cackling when he looked at me confused, still half asleep.
“You wore the pink one. I went to your work today, you were so adorable.”
“Shut up, kids love it.”
“I’m sure four-year-olds do care a lot about what coloured ribbon you wear.”
“Can you just-”
I hugged him tightly, giving him a small peck on his cheek. I felt his body tense, then slowly relax in my hug. I decided, in the end, to bring him with me to our small family get together for my mom’s birthday, and this time he was absolutely thrilled until he heard that they still don’t know about him being a shifter. I tried to explain myself, but honestly, I had nothing to say in my defence. I was afraid of their reactions because I knew them far too well, but he literally was in my ass every day, trying to talk me into confessing to them. When I was in class, he would text me during his free time, when I was coming home, he would still text me, when I left him just to shower, he dead-ass texted me again.
Saturday I was ready to punch him, while I came back from the store. I was sure he would harass me yet again with this topic, but to my surprise when I opened up the apartment door and went to the kitchen I found two big cartons of milk, which contained around 12 pints of milk in total, and Yoongi purring shamelessly on them. He looked at me and meowed loudly like he was somewhat proud that these were the first things he bought with his first paycheck, while I started to giggle. He truly looked adorable, little ball of fluff with huge yellow eyes, watching me, slowly blinking, like he would fall asleep at any given moment. My heart melted seeing him this content and I decided right then and there to bring him today with me. I wouldn’t tell my parents when every family member is around, I’d rather say it when it’s just the three of us.
I told Yoongi my idea, to which he almost immediately transformed back to his human form when I turned around. We had a few hours before we were supposed to go, so I went to my room to get ready, but I was only finished with my makeup and hair when Yoongi burst into my room. I looked at him slightly annoyed because of course, he had no idea what privacy was, but I almost choked on my words. He wore a simple black T-shirt and a black leather jacket on top of it, with black jeans and a black belt, the same coloured hat on his head.
“Who are you mourning?”
“You. Your family will kill you when you tell them I’m a shifter and I want to be there, ready to mourn.”
I just sighed at his dark humour, but he was sort of right, at least one of us looked good. I decided on a mini skirt with a pale blue shirt, something drastically different compared to Yoongi’s outfit, but when I came out to the living room I still felt like he looked far too good to be true. The clothes fit perfectly on him, and with his silver hair, he truly looked like a badass, that is, until I went back to my room with a smirk on my face. I could already hear him protest.
“I’m not putting on that thing!”
“Oh, but you are. If you are willing to wear it for children you have to wear it outside too. It’s the law anyway.” I replied in a sing-song voice.
“No, no way. No way in a million years. I have a black one for a reason.”
“You need some colour, okay?”
“I have a colour. My shoes will be black with a little red. And my hair is-”
“Clearly. Now, come here.”
I looked at him with a frown on my face. There was no way I will back down just because he feels bratty for some reason. He seemed unimpressed, pouting full out, not even trying to hide his frustration, but I didn’t give up. I walked towards him, collar in my hands, though he moved faster away than usual.
“So you staying home then.”
“What? No, I-” he looked at the collar in my hand then in my eyes. It was a hard fight inside of his heart, I could see it in his eyes “Fine. Okay, put it on.”
I almost ran behind him with a big grin on my face. Victory, as always, like he even had a chance. I slowly put on the pink collar on him, trying to see if it fit perfectly, enough that he could properly breathe, then looked at him smiling softly. He turned around, pouting still, eyes gazing into mine like he wanted to tell me something, but he held back.
Before we were close to their house I grabbed Yoongi’s hand and dragged him near a bush, hiding there like some criminals. He looked at me confused for a second, but he looked far more interested in the fact that I held his hand. He bought it closer to his face, dragging his cheeks along my wrist, while slowly closing his eyes.
“You’re the most adorable kitten in the whole world, but if I bring you there like this they’re going to flip even more. I need you to transform.”
“No.,” he said in a quiet, yet firm voice.
“I get it, I want to tell them too, but it would be better to confess when maybe, there aren’t 15 people in their house. How about that?”
“You owe me so much.”
“Would a tummy rub calm you down?”
“Who needs a tummy rub? I don’t.” I chuckled caressing his cheeks with my other hand. The purring started automatically, making me smile with endearment. “Not fair.”
“You’re my closest friend. My buddy. I want to tell them right.”
“Aaargh, stop saying things like these. Just, turn around, okay?”
I turned my head and by the time I looked back at him, he was in his kitten form, sitting on the ground, just staring at me. I grabbed him with my hand and held him close to my chest, trying hard not to laugh at how loudly he purred and was ready to nap.
Inside it was hectic. Everyone was loud, talking over each other, like at every family reunion, but I could hear my parent’s voice coming from the kitchen from miles away. I put Yoongi down on the floor so he could walk around and get to know the place, but it didn’t matter where I went he was near my legs, making me fall almost every damned time. It took me almost half an hour to get to the kitchen since suddenly every aunt and uncle wanted to talk to me and ask the same old questions they did every Christmas. I took a deep breath when I saw my parents talking with my grandparents.
After formalities and giving mom a big hug for her birthday, I gave her something small, even though she said I shouldn’t get her anything. When we finally sat down I felt much better, but Yoongi hopped right in my lap, looking up at me pleadingly. I got the signal, so I told him he can always just go out and he shouldn’t worry, I will bring lots of food home.
Everything was perfectly fine, we talked about how uncle Seyun got far too drunk on our last summer vacation and we made fun of him, nothing new here. Yoongi went out lots of times and I also could sneak him some food, really, the whole family birthday party was better than expected, that is until my dad called me over. I walked over with a confused expression, some of our guests had to go home earlier, though I was happy about it. We just said goodbye to our grandparents when he looked at me with the eyes, telling me he has something to say.
“Not to be rude or anything, but who’s that guy outside?”
I looked out the window and immediately noticed Yoongi in his human form, walking around in their garden like he has no worries. I wanted to smack my forehead, what the hell was he thinking, just strolling around like that?
“Boyfriend.” I blurted out, but my dad didn't believe me.
“Oh, come on. Is it a friend? To pick you up?”
Needless to say, things escalated quickly from then on, and not in the right direction. Yoongi walked around outside while I heatedly tried to explain to my father how nothing is wrong with being an owner of a shifter, especially since I never thought of him as an object I can own. I always did my best to show this to Yoongi too so he wouldn’t feel out of place, but it seemed impossible to discuss this with my dad, especially when my mother came in the kitchen, after hearing the ruckus from inside.
My heart felt extremely heavy of how rudely they attacked me, not even letting me explain myself, so I just shut my mouth and left as soon as possible. There wasn’t really anything to further discuss since they very obviously stated how wrong it was, and that they’re the scum of this world. They also mentioned how I was in danger next to him because you never know when his animal DNA could snap and totally take control of his human side, which was utterly ridiculous for me. I knew my parents would highly disagree with my choices, but this was on another level, surpassing my wildest imaginations.
Yoongi waited for me a little further away from the house, near the trees and bushes, intently watching the house. He probably sensed what was happening, especially after I burst out of the door, slowly closing it behind. I took long steps towards him, erasing the picture in my head how the remaining family members pretended they haven’t just heard the loudest arguing in history, and dialled Jimin. It was an action I did in a spur of a moment, asking him if we can go outside somewhere to have a drink or two. He obliged, but I could hear in his voice he was worried, that he evidently tried to suppress.
I ended the conversation before I came close enough to Yoongi, but I could see he has heard almost every word. It was naive of me to think he wouldn’t hear since his hearing is better than a complete human’s.
“It didn’t go so well, right?”
“Fucking horrible, but at least they know now. If I don’t get any money next month you’ll know why.” he licked his lips fast and quickly walked next to me, trying to keep up with my pace.
“If they don’t send I will work harder for you.” this made me slightly smile, even though it was a sad one.
“Stop, I’m already grateful you’re willing to give me some money.”
“It’s normal, we’re close.” he brushed his knuckles on mine, so I automatically held his hand, thinking that’s what he wanted to do, but was far too shy to ask “We are getting through this together.”
Saying the weather was atrocious was an understatement. The snow started to slowly melt away as the rain took over our city. It suddenly poured down on us and it didn’t stop, and when it did, it was only for a few hours, to fool everyone that the weather would be nice.
Being in bad terms with my parents took a toll on me, so I had long walks, more than usual, even though sometimes it started to rain suddenly when I was out. I always bought my notepad with me to scribble down my thought, whenever inspiration hit me. Luck just wasn’t up in my alley these days and it was obvious for everyone. Slowly I started to get bored of feeling sorry for myself and I decided to go for one last sad walk without Yoongi. He hated rain, so before I could invite him out he stubbornly told me to get back home safe and quick.
I forgot to bring an umbrella with me, being fooled by the sun that was shining brightly outside when I left my apartment. Everything was drying up around me, and the smell that came after rain made me calm down. I strolled around the city, finding out there are places I haven’t been to or even knew of.
As I walked further out of the centre of our city I noticed the place looked quite familiar, and I was quick to realize I was close to Jimin’s luxury complex. It was during the day so I thought he would be working, not wanting to bother him I turned around and walked back to the centre, that was when it started to rain again. I ran underneath a tree, but it was all too late, I was completely soaked and already cold. Whining I got out my phone from my jacket and called Jimin, half praying that he’s home.
“Hello.” he answered almost immediately in a cheerful voice “Everything alright?”
“Rain caught me and I’m close to your place. Can I come up?”
“Of course, you know the passcode?”
“Is it the same?”
“Yes, I’ll get towels ready and run a bath. Hurry.”
I rushed to his place, ignoring my growing nostalgia as I came closer and closer to his apartment door. I pressed the numbers then let myself in. It felt weird to get out of my completely wet shoes, especially since the clothes were all stuck against my skin, making me frown. Jimin power walked towards me with two huge towels and told me to get undressed here so he can bring my clothes to the drying machine. I looked at him for a moment, eyes scanning his body in sweatpants a simple hoodie. Smiling to myself I made my way to his bathroom, literally, everything looked just as I remembered it. All sorts of emotions and memories flooded my mind as I was taking what seemed like the longest and hottest shower.
I was grinning like some crazy person when I got out since everywhere smelled so manly. My face was flushed when I looked in the mirror, but I was more worried about the bags under my eyes. I really wanted to fix my relationship with my parents so I decided then and there to call them after I left Jimin’s place. I sighed doing my best to calm down my racing heart when I opened the door.
“I left you some clothes near the washing machine.” he was leaning against his brown sofa, a half-smile on his face “Hope it’s okay, but I had no woman underwear.”
“Well thank God, that would have been awkward. It’s already awkward enough.”
“You act as I have never seen you naked.”
“You haven’t seen me naked in a year, things change!”
“I’m convinced you still have a beautiful body, just like you always did.”
I didn’t reply to that since my hormones started to get wilder. My mind was flooded with all the sex we had, and how many crazy things we did, which only left my face flushed, while my breathing became ragged. Jimin just watched me as I left to change, and to be honest, I took my sweet ass time. I hung the towel next to one of his shirts and walked out feeling like I was naked. The shirt was bigger in size, but the fact that I only wore his sweatpants without any underwear, not to mention wearing a shirt without a bra, made me feel slightly exposed, to say the least.
“Come on, don’t be so shy. I will dry your hair, can I use some products on it?”
“Softeners mostly. Since I dyed my hair last year I’ve been hooked on them.” he smiled kindly while already walking out of the bathroom with said hair care products and a drier “I’m sure you’ll like the smell.”
“Sure, let’s give it a go then.”
I closed my eyes while he massaged my scalp and used all of his different types of oils and who knows what on my already damaged hair. By the smell, I would say they were pretty expensive, which made this experience much more enjoyable. I liked how he treated me like a princess, it was always his speciality to make me feel needed, maybe even when it wasn’t the case.
Slowly I became more and more relaxed, especially after he fully dried my hair. It was fluffy and seemed softer than before, or maybe it was just the placebo. Either way, I smiled big at him and thanked him for helping me out.
“It’s normal.” he stated with a soft smile “Since I like you.”
“Yeah.” I hummed, realising that silence would fill the air soon if I didn’t do anything about it. Though Jimin was faster this time.
“I never really asked you officially, but I guess now that the circumstances aligned…” he paused for a moment then continued “Do you want to be in a relationship with me? Or should I give you more time?”
“No, no, I would love to, actually.”
My voice really failed me this time too. Seriously, only Jimin can make my heart this weak, with that beautiful smile of his and the manners of a real prince. I truly felt like in 7th heaven or some kind of bullshit like that, with all the pink haze over my eyes and imaginary hearts flying around us. We exchanged a soft kiss, an innocent one at that before the drier started to beep way too loudly. I quickly changed into my own clothes and handed back his own, thanking him once again that he helped me out.
“It’s fine princess, come on, let me drive you home. It’s still raining like crazy.”
“How come you weren’t working in the office, by the way?”
“If you are the boss, you have some privileges,” he said winking at me. I just rolled my eyes, of course, Park Jimin, please tell me more about it.
I really had to try my hardest not to waltz into our apartment after he drove me home. We kissed not so innocently in the car as a goodbye, then I went back inside with the goofiest grin on my face. I was singing around the house as I threw my jacket on the handle, just when Yoongi walked out of the bathroom. He sniffed a few times before covering his nose with his fingers dramatically.
“You stink like hell. Were you with that dude again?”
“Give me a break, he’s my boyfriend, not a dude.”
The tone of his voice made me frown at him, my happiness was long gone. It felt like he was completely upset that I was dating Jimin and I had no idea why would that bother him so much.
“You had to see it coming,” I told him not really understanding what was the issue here.
“Yuu, just a few weeks ago you were mad and cried because of him, and now you suddenly date?”
“We go way back, it’s not like I just met him.”
“You didn’t hear about him for over a year, that’s a long-ass time.”
“Oh my God, just say you don’t like the fact that I’m going out with him.”
“I really don’t,” he mumbled before walking towards the kitchen.
“You haven’t even met him yet.”
“I’m not exactly fond of the thought of meeting him, thank you very much.”
“Suit yourself, I’m making Italian food today.”
“I’m going away next week.” he suddenly announced emotionlessly, while getting milk out of the fridge.
“Some stuff I have to take care of.” I was just about ready to ask him further questions when he suddenly continued “Maybe you should visit your parents, or ask them to come here and talk.”
“Yeah, I was thinking about that too.” I mumbled getting ready the ingredients “Thanks. Take care while you’re away.”
“Don’t worry, I will.”
The tension was still a little bit in the air the next day too, but slowly it started to fade away just as fast that it came. We were both pretty preoccupied, Yoongi with work, and me with the university, so when we met in the afternoons all I wanted to do was to talk with him, maybe even cuddle if he was willing to do that, though in the next couple of days he wouldn’t really let me hug him as much as before. I thought it was a normal cat thing to do, or he was just fine without any sort of attention, so I didn’t fret too much about it, although when I found him in his cat form I tackled him every time to pet and hug him closer to me. He was moving around, trying to get out from my grip, but after he realized there was no escaping he surrendered to my petting and purred while slowly dozing off. To be honest, I dreaded to meet my parents, but it was around the end of the month anyway, which meant that they would give me a month worth of pocket money.
I knew I couldn’t count on Rae giving me energy this time, since she had no idea herself about Yoongi being a shifter, so it took all my courage to call my mom first. It rang five times before it went to her voicemail, but that wasn’t enough to push me away, I called her again and again, until one day I was fed up with both of them ignoring me. For fuck’s sake, they were my parents and they should be by my side in every aspect of my life, so if they want to play like this, then I’m going to play harder. The only option was for me to go to their place, so right around when Yoongi left for a few days I went to their place, letting myself into their house. It felt weird being there when they were out working, but they left me no other choice but to visit them. I made some calming tea just in time when mom arrived home. She always got off earlier than dad, so I sat on their couch, sipping on tea while watching her closing the door behind herself. She shrieked loudly when she saw me casually sitting there.
“Yuuna! What the hell were you thinking about breaking into our home?”
“Breaking? I have keys too, remember? Since I’m your daughter and everything. You know, family? Does that ring a bell to you?”
“No need to use that tone with me. I’m still your mother.”
“Well, none of you are acting like my parents at the moment. I called both of you several times, were you suddenly too busy to answer? What if I was raped, or I was in trouble? But I guess it doesn’t bother you since I have a shifter, so now even if I died…”
“How could you even say something like that?” she threw her bag on the small sofa and walked closer to me tears evident in her eyes.
“How can I not? You were ignoring me for more than a week! Does this seem normal to you?” I asked, voice cracking. It was ridiculous to make such a big deal out of me having a shifter, it was not a big deal in my eyes at all, he was still human.
“Of course I wanted to pick up and talk with you, I just-”
She stopped talking, suddenly looking at her watch. Hurriedly she went to open up her bag, searching for something. I furrowed my eyebrows, putting down the mug on the table, while I watched her get out loads of money from her purse.
“Your father will be home in less than half an hour. Here, it will be enough for at least two weeks, I hope. I have no time to explain, I will call you later, okay?”
“Mom, what the heck? Are you bribing me?”
“Do once as I say so!”
Her voice was frantic, I never heard her scream like this, not even when they found out about Yoongi. With shaky hands, I got the money and I left without saying a word. I was confused as I could be, and the fact that I couldn’t talk with anyone made it worse. This wasn’t something that I could just sit down and talk it through with Jimin, even if I knew he would be understanding for sure.
I sat home in silence thinking about what just happened, waiting for my mom to call me. When my phone rang I hurriedly got it from the table, but to my utter disappointment, it was only Rae. I answered and chatted with her for a while, and in the end agreeing to go to a party tomorrow, since I would be alone anyway. After we hung up I did some math and put away the money for the bills, and put those in an envelope. I walked out to the living room pulling out the small drawer from the table, but to my surprise, an envelope was already there. I tossed my own farther away to check out this one, but I was getting even more confused when I saw three other envelopes. It was Yoongi’s writing on all of them.
Bills for this month + rent
Bills for April + rent
Bills for May + rent
I blinked a few times, checking the amount he put in them. It was the full price, besides the rent the others were all assumptions, since we always had a different bill every time, depending on how much we used the electricity, water and heating. I had no idea he would already pay in advance this much, and not just his part but all of it. My heart fluttered from how thoughtful he was, so I just put them back in their place and walked back to my room, just when my phone started to ring again.
My stomach shrunk when I saw mom’s name on the screen, so I hastily answered, almost accidentally dropping the phone to the floor.
“He just fell asleep.” she started off with this, but still whispered, “We can talk now.”
“What’s going on?” I asked in a worried tone.
“Your father is mad still, I’m really sorry about how I reacted. It was childish, even if I don’t agree.” she paused, probably to listen if he woke up “I understand if you are mad.”
“I was sad,” I replied fast, to assure her that I wasn’t angry anymore. Really, I just wanted my parents back.
“I’m sorry. I hope everything settles soon, I’ll try and talk with him, maybe that will help.”
“What’s his problem anyway?”
“He has this obsessive thought that they are ruining our economy, he’ll make up I’m sure. Don’t worry about him, okay?”
“Are you sure? Maybe I should talk to him too.”
“Maybe later, he would be angry again.”
We talked for around ten minutes about how is my University and what type of person is Yoongi, but I told her she can always meet him because we were most of the time home at night. I wasn’t too sure that she was willing to meet him just yet so I let go of this idea hearing her hesitation. Before I went to bed I left a quick message to Yoongi that everything was fine now, we have an ally, and for the first time, I could finally sleep all through the night without waking up.
The days were mostly uneventful even after Yoongi got back, though I was sure he was beaten up or something similar must have happened to him. His dark circles were much darker than before, not to mention the sick colour his skin had. I intended to bring him to Clara, but he refused several times, so I let it go, trying not to ask what happened. I talked to him about how it went with my parents since he didn’t answer my message. He was relieved that at least mom was with us, and now that she was our ally she would make dad change his mind. I had no idea how could someone hate Yoongi when he was the most adorable little kitten and the kindest human. Even though I haven’t told Rae nor Jimin about him, in fact, Jimin had no idea I had a “cat”, so every time he wanted to come over I just told him I liked his place better, so after the third time he just gave up.
I felt particularly exhausted after coming home from a course, ready to cuddle Yoongi, whether he wanted or not. I found him laying on his bed for a change reading a book. Curiosity got best of me, especially when I saw him hide the book as soon as I got closer to him.
“What you got there?”
“Show me then.”
“You wouldn’t like it.”
“Yoongo, what’s up? Come on, it can’t be bad!”
“It’s not bad, nobody said it’s bad.”
He was getting shy by the second, ears red as always when he got embarrassed, while he tried to play it off like he wasn’t flustered as hell. Chuckling, I tackled him on the bed, trying to get the book out of his grip, or at least catch a glimpse of the name, but he did his best to hold it as far away from me as possible. With his free hand, he started to tickle my side, to which I accidentally fell on him without any warning. He snickered at me, successfully hiding the book in his bag. I was still giggling, exhausted from laughing so much because of him, while he snuggled his head closer to me, that’s when a soft chocolate scent hit my nostrils. I looked up at him smiling, while he looked back at me with a soft smile of his own. The position got slightly uncomfortable, not to mention how flushed my cheeks became when I realized just how close we were to each other. Yoongi still hugged me from behind, burying his face in the back of my neck, inhaling my scent deeply. With one swift motion, he pulled me closer right to his chest, which caused me to melt. It was evident he was purring happily and I was quite comfortable too, but nonetheless, the question crossed my mind if what we were doing was acceptable or not, now that I was together with Jimin. Would he be mad if he found out I was cuddling with a guy? Probably, actually it was more than sure, but he was my friend and we always did this. It was normal, nothing sexual or anything of the sort. Both of us would be sad if we had to give this up, so in conclusion, I decided against telling Jimin about Yoongi anytime soon.
We both fell asleep fast, which wasn’t a big surprise. He was sleeping so soundly, I just couldn’t wake him up, when I opened my eyes from the nap. I walked back to my room to continue on an essay I started for a seminar not too long ago, when I noticed that I left my phone on mute. I found a few messages from Rae and some from my classmates, and another two from Jimin. I decided to call him since I was too lazy to type, and anyway, I needed to work on this document a little more. I was just opening up a book to check on my notes when he answered.
“Hello princess, how is your day?” he asked in a kind voice, that made my heart flutter.
“Just working on a project now. Yours?”
“Any plans for the weekend?”
“Nothing really, mostly serial watching and maybe finishing up this essay.”
“Can that essay wait?” I smirked a little before I answered.
“Do you have anything on your mind Mr Park?”
“Actually I do. Would you like to spend the weekend with me?” I was a little taken aback by his question, so I asked him to define what he meant by this “I was thinking about going on a small trip to a nearby village. Hike, walk around, go try local food and check the waterfall.”
“Isn’t it a little bit cold for that, though?”
“We’re going to Makese.”
I put down the book I held in my hand and quickly clapped my hands in front of my mouth. That’s nowhere near close to us, it’s actually fucking far away, okay not if you use a plane, but how could he just talk about a place like it was nothing? Literally, it was a Paradise, the waterfalls, and the mountains there were beautiful and it was good weather all year round. Everyone knows it and wants to visit, but of course, because it’s so far away the price is close to real fucking expensive, so it stays a dream, at least for most of us.
“Are you here?” he asked after I haven’t answered for about half a minute.
“Yes, sorry, I was just shocked. Uhm, when would you want to go?”
“Friday at 6 AM would be okay? We would arrive at around 10 AM, we’re using my jet if that’s okay. It’s faster.”
“Mhm, of course. I mean, why not?” I asked throat completely dry by now “What should I bring?”
“Swimsuit and some flowy clothes, around this time it’s already plus 30 Celsius.”
“Perfect, I already have everything planned.”
“Wait, what? How? But what if I said no?”
“I would have just cancelled.” I opened my mouth to protest since he moved again on his free will, but he cut me off “Princess it’s fine, not like it would have been bad.”
“I guess…” I mumbled under my breath.
We ended the call pretty much after that, agreeing to meet tomorrow when I had a free period for lunch. I was profusely confused, but at the same time overjoyed about it, so I just had to call Rae to calm me the fuck down. I quickly realized it wasn’t the best call since she hyped me up even more.
“Oh my God, this will be so epic. But make sure to bring something cute for me, okay?”
“Of course I will, you know I always did.” I said after an exasperated sigh “Though isn’t it weird how he already planned it in advance and all?”
“Come on, you have to plan these things in advance, even if you’re as rich as him. He just had to take the risk, didn’t he?”
“Yea, you’re right. You can’t plan these types of things last minute.”
“Exactly, but who the fuck even cares? You’ll have the hottest sex there, bring some sexy underwear and swimsuit.”
“Do you really think I have a sexy swimsuit? I just use the one I used last year, the black one.”
“You have boobs to die for, at least use them. What about underwear? Do you have some lingerie?”
“I have some things, he bought me when we were together.”
“Buy some stuff for Christ’s sake. I’ll come with you, how about that?”
“I don’t know,” I replied not too fond of the idea. I liked already the stuff I had, even though I had to admit, that most of them I got from him. “Nevermind, fine. But nothing too expensive, alright? I just want something sensual, but not bitchy. I like those better.”
“Same, we’ll find something for sure.”
This discussion reminded me of how lucky I was that my period wasn’t due until more than a week so I could wax and get ready for everything. My stomach made some flips when I imagined how sex would go since it was always the best with him because somehow he just always knew what I liked and how I liked it. After so much time together I’m not surprised, but we haven’t slept together ever since, so a lot of things could change.
I calmed my ass down enough so, that Yoongi wouldn’t feel any sort of vibe in the air. It seemed to work, or he didn’t mention it. Either way, the days went by uneventfully, and I told my mom too that I will leave for a quick trip with my boyfriend, to which she started to bombard me with questions, but I stopped her before she could invest herself too much into something that isn’t her business. I went with Rae and I bought myself a two-piece swimsuit that was on sale, nothing extraordinary, just a high waisted black bottom and a bralette that had different green plants on it, something out of a catalogue.
The lingerie was something different though, one was a pink coloured two-piece, that almost covered nothing, but I quickly fell in love with it when I saw that it had bows at the front of the thong and between the boobs, where the bralette met. The material was silk and even though it was mostly see-through I absolutely loved it so I didn’t mind splurging a little bit on it, but the other piece wasn’t that expensive. It was a normal black two-piece with lots of lace, so nothing too out of the ordinary.
I was packing everything in my smaller bag when Yoongi barged into my room like he always does. He looked down at me since I was on the floor putting things together.
“You’re leaving.” he stated in a small voice, which made my heart ache “You’re leaving me here.”
“Yoongo, come on. It will be only for the weekend, yes?” I glanced back at him, before resuming my packing.
“That’s exactly one weekend more than I would like.”
“You leave once a month too, and I usually stay with you anyway.” I could sense his restlessness without checking on him.
“You’re leaving with him, right?”
I shut my lips tightly because even though his tone was the same he always used, I just knew that he wasn’t happy about this at all. In no way I wanted him to love Jimin the way I did, but a little support wouldn’t hurt or at least try not to sound so angry about it. Even that would have been a big step in my eyes.
“Yes, I will,” I replied quietly.
“Alright, see you then on Sunday I guess. Have fun.”
He walked out without saying anything, and at this point, I was too afraid to ask him why did he barge into my room in the first place. I completely ignored the guilt that was evidently building up in my heart as I finished up packing. I didn’t feel tired at all, even though I would have to get up early. Instead of trying to sleep I decided to clean the whole house, praying that would be enough to take my mind off of things. Yoongi was all this time in his cat form and sleeping peacefully on his bed, not even flinching when I made noise all over the place.
After I took a shower I walked to him and sat down at the end of his bed, softly petting his head. He opened his eyes slowly, then stared at me, like waiting for an explanation why did I wake him up.
“I just wanted to thank you for putting three month worth of money in. You didn’t have to do that, you know? Half would have been enough. Or even nothing.”
He blinked a few times then purred softly, coming closer to my hand, and eventually laying down next to me. I smiled at this, my heart melting at this sight. I must have been petting him for quite a while because I suddenly started to feel extremely tired. I left him there, trying not to wake him up and went to sleep a little before Jimin arrives.
I was completely wrecked when I walked out of our apartment. I barely slept anything, so my eyes were extremely puffy, and clearly, I was dressed like I was going to sleep some more on his private jet. Wasn’t surprised at all when I saw him outside of a car I didn’t recognize, but still looked more expensive than my whole existence. He was casually dressed, just as I was, hair swept back, smiling softly at me. My heart was ready to jump out at this sight, he looked godly even in an oversized hoodie and tight jeans, that accentuated his thighs. I waddled over to him and gave him a bear hug, which he excitedly received, all the while giving a kiss on top of my head.
I already fell asleep in the car, so there’s no surprise when I say that I was sleeping through the whole damn flight. I thought I’d be far too excited to sleep even for a minute, but the exact opposite happened when I sat down on the comfortable chair. I could barely keep my eyes open when the flight attended explained what should we do if an emergency happened. Jimin was sat right beside me, but he didn’t look at all tired, in fact, he started to read a book, meanwhile, I snored away all those hours. He had to wake me up when there were a few minutes before landing. He caressed my cheeks softly, brushing his lips near my temple then gave me a soft peck right around when I opened my eyes. Seeing him this close made me realize just how blessed I was to have him as a boyfriend, especially since he was always so caring, even when the obsessive controlling side of him surfaced now and then. He was still the man I fell for those years ago.
“I think you should change clothes when we arrive. It’s really hot there.”
“You should too,” I replied, already going through my bag to check which one should I wear.
“This will be so much fun!” he couldn’t hide his excited smile, which made me grin at him too.
“Do you have something specific planned?”
“Yes, I planned almost everything. We’re going hiking today, and see the best waterfall in Makese. Have you seen the pictures I sent you?”
“Yes, sounds tiring, but it’s time to get in shape. Not everyone can be as athletic as you are.” I looked at him while pouting, through those jeans it was evident that he was working out in his free time.
“Maybe you should come and work out with me, then. It’s fun.” he commented, kissing my temple again “Though I know a workout that you might like better.”
His tone hasn’t changed, so I had no idea if he was really insinuating that we will have mind-blowing sex, or he was still talking about the traditional working out. Either way, I laughed it off, since I didn’t want it to be all awkward between us. It has been over a year since we did anything sexual, obviously, I was freaking out about the whole situation. Maybe his tastes changed, mine did for sure, but I was positive it will work out in our favour in the end, so I took a deep breath and looked out the small window, from where I could clearly see all the plants, houses and hotels of Makese.
The weekend was unreal, we visited all the places we wanted to and had generally an excellent time, topping it off with the best sex I had in a long time. Jimin exceeded all of my expectations, that is why when the day came to go back I was sad and pouted next to him all night. He laughed it off, caressing my hands and reminding me that we can always come back whenever we want so I shouldn't be down.
I barely looked at my phone through the weekend, which resulted in several messages and calls from some of my friends and mom. Rae didn't bother me at all, and to thank her I bought her a unique lamp that had the shape of a huge crab, which would perfectly blend in her room. I cackled playfully after I left her a teasing message, surely she would die out of curiosity and bombard me with replies.
The flight was better when we went back, we talked for 4 hours and kissed when we got bored with a specific topic. Can't remember the last time I felt this much at ease, this mini-vacation was much needed and I couldn't thank Jimin enough for it. He became bashful every time I reminded him of his kindness, trying to change the discussion best way he could. I laughed it off and made sure to somehow show him my gratitude soon.
It was almost midnight when he finally let me go of his embrace. We made out in his car, that almost evolved into heated sex if it wasn't for me stopping his urges. With a cute pout, he kissed me goodbye and I went up to the third floor as quietly as humanly possible. Yoongi was probably fast asleep already since he had work to do on Monday, and with that in my mind, I gingerly opened and closed the door behind myself. Weirdly enough the place wasn't as chaotic as I thought it would be, though his room was messy as always.
I made my way to the bathroom and took a quick shower then went to bed so I could get some sleep before my noon classes. Yoongi already was at work when I woke up so we completely missed each other but to my surprise, he wrote to me just when I was about to go to my first course.
Hey, wanna eat together in the afternoon?
Sure, yea! At home or-?
Let's go out this time.
Agreed will you come to my uni?
For some reason, I felt at ease after these messages. Somehow I thought he would be angry at me because I wasn't with him on the weekend but from the message, everything seemed normal. Yes, everything was fine, that is until I remembered how I should tell Rae about him because it has been more than two months now and she still had no clue about Yoongi being a shifter. I took a deep breath and put my phone away, concentrating on my professor instead, surely I will tell her this week, but not today.
"Hey, do you have time for a quick coffee these days?" Rae called me right after my class ended "I need to hear all the spicy details!"
"Course you do, more like, you just want to hear the sex part and nothing else."
"You know me." she snickered not even slight remorse in her tone "Wednesday?"
"Sounds good to me. I'll text you later today, I'm going out for a bit."
I zipped up my jacket as soon as the cold air hit my face. This was in stark contrast with the humid and hot weather from Makese, I got far too used to that weather and now coming back was harder than I thought. It was unusual again to wear a scarf and a beanie, not to mention all the warm clothes because even though it was March, the cold didn't go away.
I chatted a little with my classmates then went out through the front gate and almost immediately stopped dead in my track. I recognized the grey hair instantly, though he wore his usual black thigh high jacket, the dress pants and the elegant shoes made my eyebrows furrow.
"Yoongi, where were you?" I asked curiously, he just frowned.
"Don't ask, we had meetings all day and I had to wear this suit."
"It looks good on you." I answered grinning while we walked towards the nearest restaurant "But this is unfair. Now you will look too hot next to me."
"As if." he scoffed, almost hitting the back of my head "It's not a big deal."
But it was. When we finally sat down to eat and he got out of his jacket my jaw dropped. The elegant blazer was fiery red and underneath it, he wore a simple black turtleneck that hid his collar perfectly. I was staring hard at his attire unable to look away even when he looked back at me with curious eyes. I smiled bashfully at how stupidly I was reacting just because he didn't wear his usual jean plus oversized hoodie pairing. I could almost feel my heart beating faster and I wasn't the only one who found this unusual.
"Why are you anxious?" he asked me out of nowhere, bold as always.
"I'm happy we got some time together again."
"Right, you couldn't live without me. Your life would be far too boring," he smirked while I tried to hit his chest, failing miserably "Don't hurt the poor kitten."
"Now you are playing that card?"
"Am I succeeding?"
"No. At all."
All through the dinner, I took small glances up at him, but after a while when I realized what I was doing I shamefully looked down at my hands. This wasn't right. Of course, Yoongi was always handsome in my eyes, but now I had a boyfriend who appreciated me, so why did I suddenly feel so interested in him? Was this a sort of reverse psychology? And how would Yoongi think if he knew I'm staring at him when he isn't looking? It felt wrong on so many levels and I had to stop myself before I did something stupid. First, it was that awkward cuddling session we had just before I left and now my heart is beating fast right after I come back from a supposedly romantic getaway with my boyfriend. I knew all these symptoms, I had them many times before, but I refused to give in to them.
"Do your vitamins work?" I asked him suddenly while we walked from the bus station to our shared apartment.
"Yes, surprisingly I'm not dying because of your smell."
"Real funny, next month I'll be more subtle." I joked with him, though he remained uphrased.
"Not your fault. It's normal for shifter and hybrids to feel this and most of the time it doesn't even bother us. I was just too sensitive that's all."
"Wish I could help with these things somehow." I looked at him, feeling sorry because I was causing him trouble even though it was unintentional "Can't I do something?"
"No, not unless-"
He cut himself off and it didn't matter how much I begged and teased he didn't tell me what he wanted to say.
When we arrived home I let him go and take a shower first since his day was probably more tiring than mine. He stretched out while walking in, and while I heard the water run I messaged Jimin and asked how was his day.
I almost had a heart attack when Yoongi's phone buzzed on the small table right beside his bed. I got up from my seat and automatically went to see what happened, that is until I realized that I had no right to barge into his personal life like this. I quickly sat back but I had a sinking feeling near my stomach area, the little demon in me told me to check his phone even if it meant he would catch me. With red cheeks I looked at the bathroom, the water was still running and I could hear him showering, so it wouldn't hurt to just check his phone, right? Wrong, but I did so anyway.
I leaned in closer touching with my fingertip the screen, which lit up. My eyebrows furrowed after I read the message from someone named Dia, and from the sentence that I could read I was sure it was a she.
Why do we only meet when you rut? Babe, it's not...
Babe? Babe ? Does he has someone in his life and he didn't even tell me about it? For how long has this been going on and what the hell does rut even mean?
I got all worked up for no reason, but next thing I knew I closed the bedroom door and sat down in front of my computer and searched up the word. The water just stopped running, meaning that Yoongi was probably changing into his pyjamas and brushing his teeth. I still had some time to browse around the internet before he would tell me to go and take a shower.
Medical Definition of hybrid/shifter rut. (Entry 1 of 2) 1: a periodic and often monthly recurring state of certain male animals (such as cats or dogs) during which behaviour associated with the urge to breed is displayed. 2: the period during which rut occurs: the breeding occurs once every month that can vary from three days up until a week. They are incredibly territorial and combative in this state. Unmated hybrids/ shifters must be isolated at this time, no excuses.
I furrowed my eyebrows and quickly read more about this topic then clicked on the word mate to find more information about it.
The shifter/hybrid who needs/wants to mate is often possessive and can be dangerously invested in the safety of their partner. When they mate the penis enlarges during climax and remains enlarged to the point where he is stuck inside the female for as long as it the mating process goes on. This happens to ensure insemination, and the male can ejaculate several times before he shrinks down small enough to unmount.
"Yuu the bathroom's free!"
Yoongi barged into my room again and I had to quickly shut down my laptop before he saw what I was reading. I tried to be fast, but he still caught on quickly that I was reading about something unusual, because he walked next to me and started to tease me this time what I was reading about.
"Nothing." I murmured in a small voice, getting up from my chair to get a fresh towel from my closet.
"Your face is red, I can hear how your breathing is ragged and it seems like your heart beating accelerated. Are you seriously going to lie when your friend is a cat shifter?"
"Curse you and your feline DNA!"
I shouted playfully while getting out of my room. I could still hear him snickering even though I was already in the safe space of my bathroom, but honestly, I felt like vomiting from anxiety. I prayed for the gods that he wouldn't feel how anxious I was right now as I let the water run.
Everything made sense now and I felt sad about my newfound discovery. Of course, Yoongi would have rut every month, that explains why he went away the last two times, and that Dia person must be the girl who he meets when he needs to fuck for three days. The realization that he would be mating or having sex with a girl that calls him babe left a sour taste in my mouth but who was I to question his life choices?
I took a deep breath and stood under the warm water, trying my best to forget about the jealousy that was creeping up on me. This was ridiculous, why would I even feel jealous about this? I had a boyfriend for fuck's sake and now I was acting like Yoongi was some silly crush.
I decided to wash my hair too while I was there, so I took my sweet time, hoping that Yoongi would be already asleep when I came out. My plan seemed to work because outside the bathroom it was dead quiet. When I went to bed I almost completely forgot about what I read and saw on his phone, that is until I closed my eyes. Images popped up in my head like some nightmare and I had to do something about it. I grabbed my pillow in frustration and almost threw it on the floor when a new image appeared out of nowhere. It was Yoongi, silver locks falling on his dark orbs, breathing heavily while he fucked me mercilessly in bed for hours without any break. My screams echoing through the apartment, his groans erupting from his plush lips in an animalistic behaviour, something I never knew he was capable of doing.
I pushed my lips together, my heat was throbbing painfully from the image of Yoongi fucking me roughly, pumping me full with his cum, his member enlarging in me painfully. I whimpered slightly as I put the soft pillow between my legs, the friction causing me immense pleasure. I had to bite on my lips hard when I started to move the pillow between my legs, enjoying every little push my clit had when the fabric brushed against it. With trembling hands, I did my best to keep the pillow steady while I humped it more roughly after each passing minute. Yoongi kept coming up in my mind, how skilfully he'd use that tongue of his on my heat and how mercilessly he'd fuck me when he was rutting. All the rough handling he'd do to me if only we had the chance...
A low moan escaped from my lips, I already felt the climax, my hips moving sloppily against the pillow, meanwhile, my panties were completely stuck to my sex from how wet I was. I threw the pillow on the floor and decided to use my hands instead, my right hand quickly pulling the soft fabric of my panties to the side and inserting two fingers in my heat. Soon wet noises filled the silence of the night, while I brushed my left hands over my swollen clit imagining Yoongi's plush lips sucking on it.
I had an intense orgasm, my whole body shaking until I slowly pulled out both of my hands from my panties, face red from shame and guilt. Did I just masturbate to the thought of Yoongi while he was sleeping next door?
I could have cried, but instead, I changed my panties and got a new pillow, trying to forget about this incident as soon as possible. There was no way I would tell anyone about this especially since I was dating Jimin, what would he even say if he found out? Rightfully so he'd probably break up with me, and I wouldn't even blame him at this point. Everything was going so fine until now, why did I have to fuck this up with my hormones?
Somehow I managed to fall asleep, though when I woke up I felt exhausted from all the nightmares I had. My subconscious didn't want me to forget about what I did that night, and things became awkward fast when I walked out of the room because Yoongi was just getting ready to go to work.
"Morning." he greeted me with a grumpy voice "I might work late today, a new patient is coming."
"Hey, yeah, no biggie," I answered while avoiding eye-contact.
"See you in the afternoon or you'll have a date with the dude?"
"He's Jimin and no, I will be finishing up my assignment which I'll send to the professor."
I held in my breath until he shut the door behind him. I almost collapsed on the kitchen floor, how the hell am I going to look him in the eyes for the rest of my life? And how am I going to look Jimin in the eyes? There was no way I'll tell anyone about this, I will take this to my grave if I have to. I swore to myself to act as if nothing happened and maybe sort some things out in myself because logically I knew this was wrong and I loved Jimin, but...
“Okay, so, I have a friend-“
“And that friend has a boyfriend. Now, what if that friend lived together with a guy and started to realize that she has feelings for that guy?”
“You fucking idiot, you fell for Yoongi?!”
Rae looked at me upset, even though her drunken haze she was evidently agitated, but the alcohol made things worse.
“It’s a friend! Not me, a friend.” I tried to save myself, but evidently, I was giving myself away with my red cheeks and drunken slurs.
It was Saturday and I was feeling alone in our apartment. Everything changed between me and Yoongi, I don’t know when it started, but I felt the tension in the air every time both of us were at home. After I came back from Jimin it seemed like both of us calmed down, yet we didn’t talk like friends anymore, only like flatmates. It killed me inside to see how our friendship gradually crumbles, yet I didn’t do anything about it. I arrived home as always, went out more with Jimin while he worked and came back to our apartment in the afternoon as per usual, only he roamed around the rooms in his cat form.
Nobody knew what I was going through, I thought it would be too difficult to talk about this with Rae, especially after I confessed her that it would be better if she didn’t come over and meet Yoongi just yet. She was suspicious but didn’t ask why, which I’m extremely thankful for.
After the cold shoulder from Yoongi and the fact that he left on Friday without saying goodbye, sadness hit me harder than I would have liked. I somehow managed to get through Friday, but when I opened my eyes on Saturday I was already done with the weekend. I didn’t have any course to study for, my thesis was coming together fast and pretty well, so I cleaned up the whole apartment and called over Rae to get shitfaced.
I bought a big vodka and some orange juice to go with it, while I was talking on the phone with mom, asking about dad. Apparently, he started to soften up a little bit because of mom’s persuasion and now was willing to send me money. I knew soon enough he would understand and let me be with Yoongi, even though right now I didn’t understand either what was going on between me and him.
Rae came to my rescue with a huge smile, an even bigger bag on her back.
“What’s that for?” I asked while going to the kitchen to pour ourselves the drinks.
“We’re finally fixing your hair! Before getting drunk, because that would be awful.” she cackled while pulling scissors out of her bag together with some other things “Now sit down.”
“Seriously? Do you want to do this at 9PM?” I scoffed at her, all I wanted was to get drunk, but she wouldn’t budge.
“Yes. We have time to get drunk later on too. This will take only an hour, your ends are killing me, and I was thinking about trying to get the dye out so you can have your honey hair back.”
“I started to like the plum colour actually, can we dye it again?”
“Sure, I have a bunch with me, just in case.”
I put on some music on my laptop and talked with Rae while she did my hair. In the end, it took more than one hour, but after she put the dye on my hair we started to drink like sailors on a break. Half the bottle of vodka was already in our system by the time she was drying up my hair, that's why we were probably the loudest in the whole building. Though as the night progressed and I drank more my emotions ran wild and I just had to spill everything to her, I couldn’t hold it in anymore.
“I can’t believe you.” she drank the vodka orange like water, looking for courage from the beverage “When did this start?”
“I don’t know but it just pisses me off how he’s fucking some shifter whore right now.” Rae looked at me with a perplexed expression, so I added “He’s in rut. He’ll come back on Monday as if nothing happened.”
“Break up with Jimin,” she stated matter of factly like it was the obvious thing to do.
“It’s not that easy, I love him, he’s-“
“Do you love him now or you love his memory?”
The question struck something in me and the next thing I knew tears were rolling down my cheeks. Rae cooed loudly and held me gently in her embrace, even if I was drunk I knew she was right and I had to make a decision fast, so Jimin wouldn’t suffer more. It wasn’t his fault, in fact, it was nobody’s fault right now, it’s not like you can control who you have a crush on.
That night I’d rather didn’t talk about that topic anymore, because crying didn’t suit my lifestyle, so we drank peacefully after the small crying session. We fell asleep around 7AM in my bed, she was snuggling closer to me from behind and I did my best to shut down my loud brain. Sunday was dreadful, my head hurt from drinking so much and I felt anxious about meeting Yoongi on Monday.
Rae was with me almost until late afternoon, we cleaned up the kitchen and ate lunch together, but after that, she also had to go home to get ready for her own classes. I kindly asked my friend if she could take notes for me too tomorrow because I had zero energy and I wasn’t sure on Monday I’d feel any better.
I was in bed for the remaining of the day, when my phone rang. My whole body tensed and with shaky hands, I answered with a presumably normal tone.
“Hello there Princess, missed me?” Jimin’s voice was flirty, as usual.
“Mhm, of course.” I answered in a low tone, not sure how to act “Have you been okay?”
“I’m missing my beautiful girlfriend, why don’t you come over? I ordered an Italian dish and we can eat it together, then have some hot, steamy sex.” my core involuntarily clenched from his suggestive tone “What do you say?”
“I-“ after taking a small breath I continued “Not today Jimin, I want to be alone.”
“But we haven’t met for almost four days.” he whined like a little child “Don’t you miss me?”
“Of course I do.” I stuttered from the accusation, even though he was right.
“Yuuna what’s going on? You have been acting awfully weird this week, did something happen home?”
“No, not really. I just want to be left alone, please?”
“I’m coming over.” he seemed serious, and the panic I felt almost made me puke on the floor.
“No, I will. I can come over, okay?”
I took another shower and brushed my teeth before looking through my closet to wear something simple. I knew I would have to talk with him about my feelings and how they changed in two weeks and I was ready to take on whatever came my way. I was sure sooner or later I’d have to break up with him, yet when I was in his apartment I almost fainted from what I saw. He stood there with enormous bouquets of roses and several expensive bags of clothes. He sat in his chair with a smug smile on his face when he saw how dumbfounded I was. Under normal circumstances, I would have been happy for this surprise, but right now I just felt guilty about it. He truly had no idea that I was going to break up with him today.
“You were sad, I thought I’d surprise you, baby,” he explained with a devilish smile.
“That’s a big surprise…”
I mumbled incoherently, incapable to get out from the trance. I came here to break up with him or talk things through, but how could I strike up a conversation about our relationship when he’s standing in front of me with gifts and his bulge is prominent in his sweatpants?
I took a deep breath, I didn’t love him, Rae was completely right, it was the memory I loved. Jimin was kind and giving, yes, but I couldn’t be with him like this anymore, it wasn’t right when I knew he loved me. I had to be honest about this otherwise things could get ugly fast.
I chew on my lips softly and sat down next to him with a troubled expression on my face. This was going to be a long and hard conversation and Jimin knew something was up as soon as I looked into his eyes. He questioned me several times what was going on when I finally had enough courage to tell him that the relationship was not working out for me. He stared at me without any emotion in his eyes, I can’t remember the last time I saw him this serious. He looked scary clenching his jaw, hands grasping his knees roughly. I explained my viewpoint as well as I possibly could, but I only prayed that he wouldn’t feel too hurt after this.
“It’s because of that shifter, isn’t it?”
My heart stopped for a moment when I heard him say this. Jimin didn’t even blink when he asked me, all he did was look at me in the eyes with so much fury I thought he’d start shouting any minute now.
“Shifter?” I asked unsure as of what he meant exactly.
“It’s that idiotic shifter of yours, isn’t it? Yoongi or what he’s called. I know.” his gaze was icy while he spoke “I know you’ve been living with him for some time now. I wanted to surprise you one day when you had classes, but I was the one surprised when he opened the door. He told me everything you didn’t. Until when were you going to keep it a secret?”
“I wanted to tell you later, didn’t think it was that important. We are friends, I don’t see him as an object I can own.” I replied honestly.
“Did you cheat on me?”
“What? No, no I didn’t. I told you why I want to break up-“
“So you chose him instead of me.” he took a sharp breath and let his head hang. I was getting upset now too, he didn't understand or didn't want to understand where I was coming from at this point.
“Jimin I never cheated on you, this is not some sort of love battle of choosing.”
“It’s not a battle when you’re not even worth fighting for.” I gaped at him, he was acting like a different person from the Jimin I knew “Get out. I don’t want to see you ever again.”
He didn’t have to tell me twice, I almost ran out of his apartment with tears streaming down my face. I heard him throw stuff around in his living room as soon as I closed the door behind myself. I stood in front of his door for a few seconds just listening to the chaos that was happening inside, shocked to move.
I let out a whimper while I dialled Rae when I finally realized I needed to get away from him. She picked up the phone quickly and I opened my mouth to explain what happened but I couldn't formulate my thoughts into words. I was crying so hard I started to hiccup every now and then. Rae did her best to calm me down while I sat at the back of the complex on a bench, shaking from adrenaline. I was so scared of Jimin, for a mere second, I even thought about the possibility of him hitting me. He was outraged, and the fact that he started to throw things around only proved my theory right.
"Wait, let me get you, okay? Are you still there?"
"A-At the back," I answered slowly.
"Stay there. I'll be there as fast as I can, okay?"
To say I felt under the weather was an understatement. There was no way I would go to classes on Monday, it's out of the question. Rae made sure to give me enough space to calm down while watching out for me, comforting me with her wise words and making me realize how I really made the right decision. I never knew Jimin could get this aggressive, to think that in the beginning I was feeling sorry for him and now I'm emotionally drained, hiding away in my bed...
I gave myself a whole day to calm down fully. On that day I cried so much I thought I'd be dehydrated. I listened to music loudly, slept in and ate almost 1 kg worth of chocolate chip ice cream to make me feel somewhat better. This self-pity day ended as soon as I heard Yoongi searching for his keys in the afternoon. There was no use to hide how shit I felt, I'm sure he could feel it from miles away, even though I hid away in the comfort of my room.
"Yuu," he called out my name, his voice weak.
"In my room." I had to repeat my answer because my voice cracked the first time.
I looked up from underneath my huge duvet. He was barely standing in my room, clothes hanging off of his body like he lost a few kilograms during the weekend. His silver hair was messier than usual, face as white as the wall, but what really caught my attention were all the purple hickeys on his neck. I chose to ignore that, even though my eyes welled up with tears yet again.
"Jimin happened," I answered in a barely audible voice "He made me chose."
"Chose?" he furrowed his eyebrows.
"Between you or him."
There was a deafening silence in the air. His face showed no emotion while he turned around to leave my room. I got out of my bed so quickly I almost fell on the floor.
"Where are you going?" I asked in a panicked voice.
"I'm starting to pack."
"Idiot, why would you pack?! I'm here, aren't I?" he turned around quickly, eyes huge from surprise.
"What? You're staying with me?"
"Of course I'm staying with you! Why would I leave? I broke up with him yesterday." I answered in a shaky voice.
"You made a mistake," he replied in a cold tone "You should call him back and tell him that you're sorry an-"
"He almost hit me." Yoongi's eyes flashed yellow for a second before going back to his normal chocolate orbs again "He didn't, but if I stayed any longer I'm sure he would have. When I left I heard objects crashing..."
Yoongi hid his face in the palms of his hands. I was unsure as of what should I do, the tension was in the air as always and I felt so many emotions I thought I'd cry again. How is someone even capable of feeling this many things at the same time?
"That asshole," he mumbled, voice barely above a whisper "He should be glad I didn't take him on that day."
"What happened on that day? He told me came by and you two met, but-"
"Nothing you need to know about," he answered quickly.
I opened my mouth to protest when he out of nowhere hugged me. The warmth of his body made me suddenly calm down, a small smile developing on my face. I could clearly hear him purring audibly while his hands stroked my back softly. I hummed in content, my hands going straight to play with his silver locks. I felt him take a sharp breath, then nuzzle his face in the crook of my neck. Were we back to being friends again now?
Hello there lovelies!
Thanks to some kind comments I realized I accidentally uploaded last time the same chapter, so here is the original one! Enjoy xx
After the incident with Jimin it felt like everything slowly went back to normal between me and Yoongi. I'd like to think that the break up with Jimin bought us closer together as friends, we watched movies almost every day and talked continuously. The tension that was between us faded by time just like my feelings did towards Jimin. I could never thank enough Rae for opening my eyes, she was completely right and I couldn't be more grateful. It would have broken me if I stayed a longer period with him, especially after knowing that he met Yoongi and acted the way he did. I had to erase him from my life in every possible way, starting with his number and social media.
Though I was in a constant joyous mood because of the sudden change in my life, not to mention my dad finally gave in and called me out of nowhere one night, something still bugged me deep inside. That something was a feeling I wanted to let go of badly, yet I prayed for a miracle that it will never leave me.
This feeling was love that I had towards Yoongi and as much as I wanted to I couldn't do anything about it. I had no intention of telling him, that is why I wanted to get over these annoying emotions as soon as possible, though I very much enjoyed the side effects of it. Call me a masochist, it was nice to feel his arms around my waist while we cuddled in bed and lazily talked about everyday life. Or when he purred happily every time I ruffled his hair just so I could get a reaction from him, but even if he just looked at me with endearing expression my heart melted on the spot.
I hoped he wouldn't notice my lingering stares or how my heart beating sped up every time he casually hugged me for our cuddle session. I knew it would ruin our friendship completely if I confessed especially because I haven't noticed any sign that he would feel the same. Rae tried her best to persuade me but I refused when she bought up the Yoongi topic, it was out of the question.
"Let's spice up your room!"
It was Saturday and Yoongi felt extremely lazy, as always, as he looked at me expressionlessly from his bed. Everything was a mess around him, clothes, cartons of milk and who knows what else on the floor.
"No." he answered bluntly and got back to his laptop that he bought a few days ago.
"Alright then, guess I'll just have to confiscate all your milk," I replied with a sing-song voice, the reaction was priceless.
"You wouldn't dare." he plopped up from his seat and walked towards me with a death glare, but I only laughed.
"Of course I would. Let's make it homier."
"It is already cosy enough for me."
"You can't even see the carpet."
"We have a carpet?" I sighed at his question as I grabbed a handful of shirts "Hey, don't touch my precious belongings."
"If they were so precious then why were they on the floor?! You will put everything away and I'm getting the hoover and the mop, this is horrible."
"If you are this bored we could just continue with Hannibal," he mumbled under his breath but nevertheless began to clear the floor.
It took us about two hours to clean up everything and make some other decorative arrangements, which Yoongi was definitely more excited about. We even went out to buy some new candles for him and we also accidentally bought a bottle of wine to drink today. We worked really hard, it was the least we could get ourselves.
I had no idea cleaning could tire me us out so much, I only realized it when we sat down on his bed, laptop in front of us. He searched between his files for the serial so we could continue watching it, meanwhile, I tried to open the bottle. I poured the red beverage in our fanciest glasses so the experience will be a five star one.
"He's an idiot. How come he didn't notice who's the killer?" Yoongi slurred after drinking half the wine "Ridiculous. I could tell from part one!"
"Maybe cause your senses are heightened."
"I call bullshit." he mumbled as he put down the glass on the table "Let's lie down."
Maybe the alcohol played a huge role but I could feel my eyes getting tired and hugging Yoongi seemed like a brilliant idea at the moment. Though I wanted to spoon him from behind he tenderly, but firmly, turned my body around so I was at the side of the bed, closer to the laptop, while he pressed his body up against my back.
My breathing became ragged as I smelled his cologne, his hair tickling the back of my neck. I pushed my lips together, I knew my body was too stiff and he'd notice soon something isn't right, so I gradually melted into his touch, wiggling my body into a comfortable position. I felt small under his strong arms, maybe at one point I wanted to get away, that's why I continued to move around gently just so I wouldn't bother him. My pussy clenched automatically when I suddenly felt something hard against my butt and I didn't have to be a science professor to know what was going on. This never ever happened before.
My face became flushed and I suddenly thanked all the gods that Yoongi couldn't see me in this embarrassing moment. I truly hated how my body reacted on its own, core pulsating as a sheen of need coated my entrance. I slowly moved to get out of the bed, I thought he might be asleep that's why he's not pushing his body away from mine, though my blood ran cold when he suddenly pulled me back into his embrace with his hand that was resting around my waist.
"Yoongi?" my voice almost cracked.
"Hmmm?" he mumbled close to my ear, just as goosebumps ran all over my body.
"Nothing," I replied in a small voice, already accepting the situation.
His member was still rock hard, pressed against me but I could do nothing about it, so I just casually closed my eyes and prayed that I would fall asleep soon. I can't remember exactly when I truly fell asleep, all I know is when I opened my eyes I was still in his bed. Our positions slightly changed, I was hugging him from the front with my left arm, while his right leg was across mine. He was breathing softly, eyes still closed, cheeks completely squished on the pillow. I resisted the urge to poke his cute button nose, but I couldn't help looking down at his pants to check if he was still hard. I cursed myself silently for being so greedy, I should still be thankful that we had a good friendship, even though what happened yesterday night was weird.
I decided it was the best if I didn't mention it since he hasn't either. When he woke up I already did breakfast and I even put a glass of milk next to his plate which almost immediately made him look suspiciously at me. He still wore his huge white shirt that hung loose off from his body, with the long black pyjama trousers. His silver hair was a whole mess but what made the look even cuter was his red pouty lips as he spoke with me.
"Did you kill someone?"
"Why does that sound more like a question than a statement?"
"Why would you even think I killed someone in the first place?"
"Because you put me milk. You never do this. Ever."
"Well excuse me, next time I will just-" he looked at me for a second, his chocolate brown eyes lingering for a moment before looking back to his plate.
I smiled softly, I knew the milk would work, so now I was ready for the hardest part of my plan. The convincing.
"Listen, I know you don't really like water..."
"I knew you wanted something." he replied with a mouth full with omelette "Go on."
"BUT I never showed you the lake, it has so many beautiful flowers around it and the weather is pretty nice so we could grab a small boat and..."
I tried my best to persuade him, but his face changed from enthusiastic to afraid really fast. I sighed in defeat, there was no way he would come on that small boat with me, so I'd just have to go alone one day and look at all the cute ducklings on the lake. He licked his lips as he looked at my facial expression, I probably looked like someone who's cat just died, because the next thing I knew, we were getting ready to go out.
I bounced happily next to him while he mainly laughed at my childish behaviour, going as far as trying to escape when I started to laugh obnoxiously.
Lots of couples, elderly people and teenagers were outside, since the sun was shining brightly and generally the weather was warm. After so much rain it felt refreshing as I walked next to the lake together with Yoongi, who on the other hand cautiously stayed away from the water as much as he could. I reassured him he wouldn't have to touch it or be in a boat with me if he didn't want to. After this he seemed to relax somewhat, smiling softly and the cute little ducklings that decided to tackle his feet. A bunch of them ran with their tiny feet towards him and started to walk around him happily. I had to hold in a cooing that almost erupted from my lips when I saw him lean down to carefully pet some of them. He was content and completely relaxed at this point, eyes squinting from smiling so hard.
I couldn't calm down my heart, he really was everything I ever wanted and so much more. It seemed almost surreal how a person can get this reaction out of me without noticing my feelings for him.
Yoongi only stood up when two bigger ducks approached us, probably the parents of all these tiny ducklings, and started to walk away as the little ducks went back to the water. I was so mesmerized I had to wake up from my trance, almost tripping on a bigger rock.
"We can get a boat if you want," he said out of nowhere, watching intently the flowers that were already blooming near the lake.
"But you hate water."
"I can survive a day, besides, as you said, I don't have to touch it or anything. We will just casually sit and watch the ducks."
"You like them, don't you?" he smiled fondly, not even trying to pretend he wasn't affected by their cute attack.
"Yes, shall we go?"
Yoongi was confident that he could easily ride in a boat with me, though when his eyes laid on the small crafting he seemed to tense. It was much smaller than initially, I anticipated but it wasn't hard to manoeuvre with it, at least that's what I liked to think.
A helpful man came to our rescue when neither of us moved, just stared at it waiting for a miracle to happen. He had a huge smile on his face as he explained how it works and informed us kindly that we had one hour which was more than enough for Yoongi. His eyes flickered at an incredible speed between the water and the boat, I even thought about cancelling everything, but when he sat inside with shaky hands I changed my mind.
"Have a lovely day you two, enjoy your date!" the man excitedly shouted after us right when he pushed the boat with his all power.
I wanted to quickly turn around and with flushed cheeks explain the situation to him like he actually cared about it, though I shut my mouth when I felt Yoongi's ice-cold hands on mine. With furrowed eyebrows, I looked up at him only to see his panicked expression. I knew in this situation I had to take over control otherwise we would be screwed, so I gently grabbed his hands in mine.
"I know you're scared but one of us has to use the paddle and that someone will be me."
"But then you can't hold my hand." he stuttered, the mask of bravery fading quickly "What am I supposed to do?"
"Look at the ducks," I replied smiling, motioning with my head towards the birds not too far away from us.
"Right, ducks. I'm doing this for the ducks."
"Exactly, only the ducks."
"Mhm, only for them."
He tried to encourage himself the best way he could, while I slowly let go of his hands, though only when I was completely sure he would be okay with it. Yoongi needed a few seconds to calm down, I knew everything was okay when he dared to actually look around us. At that moment his face lit up steadily, eyes sparkling from excitement to see all the ducks and swans swimming on the lake. After half an hour he took out his phone and captured them in their natural habitat, then turned the other way to take pictures of the flowers and plants. After a while, I forgot to pay attention to our surroundings, too hypnotised by his childish side. I probably had the worst heart eyes at that moment, but as long as he didn't notice I was in the safe zone.
Hello my lovelies!
Here's the newest chapter, hopefully, you'll like it :) I welcome comments as well, have a wonderful day!
My mouth went completely dry as it sunk in who was standing in front of me. I never thought that I would have the chance to meet Dia personally and to be completely frank, I never wanted to. She was smaller than me by almost one head, had silky brown hair that she kept in a high ponytail, and even this way the end of her hair touched the middle of her back. Her makeup was flawless, couldn't decide if she was a makeup artist or just excelled at doing makeup anyway. She had several piercings on her left ear and wore two large hoops, which somehow made her look like a bad girl. She wore an almost see-through black button-up shirt with an extra mini skirt that showed off her skinny legs perfectly. To say that I felt inferior in my one-week-old pyjamas with hair only in a messy ponytail was an understatement.
Dia looked ready to fight someone and from the looks of it that someone was unfortunately me.
"Anyway, what are you doing in Yoongle's apartment?" she asked in an icy tone that didn't go well with her fabulous look.
"I live here." I decided to keep a neutral tone and skim over the fact that she called Yoongi Yoongles.
"Seriously?" she squinted her eyes before rolling them "What a joke. Where is he now anyway?"
"Working, it's a weekday," I replied feeling awkward by the second "Maybe I can help somehow?
"Yes, tell him to fucking answer that goddamned phone. I have been trying to text and call him for two days now."
"Maybe he's just busy."
It was a lie, he was with me on those days. Because of my break up we were back to our old ways, hanging out every chance we got, even though Rae advised me to let him be sometimes. It never occurred to me that Dia tried to get a hold of him since he never really paid attention to his phone while we hung out.
I already despised this girl without knowing anything about her. It was enough for me that she was his companion while on rut, but the cheek she had to come over is ridiculous.
"Just tell him to call me back," she replied then turned around without saying anything else.
Curiosity took over me and after I closed the door I went to my phone to text Yoongi. Before I sent a truly nasty text I decided against it. He's working right now and I mustn't be jealous anyway. He's single and if he wishes to be with her when he's on rut then what can I say?
As I asked myself this absurd question another thought came out of nowhere that made my cheeks flushed instantly. What if it was me? Would he be weirded out if I suddenly offered him to help him with his rut? It would make everything awkward between us and I didn't want to do that, especially because we were back to normal.
"What should I do?" I asked Rae the obvious question that has been bugging me for a while now.
"Stupid cunt." she answered automatically "You can't do that, it would be so weird. Just confess if you want to or shut up forever. You're not together so stop being a jealous hoe."
"You should have seen her with your own eyes. I bet she is also a cat shifter or a-"
"Stop it. From the things you told me she seems like a real bitch and I have no idea how Yoongi can fuck her. I bet he doesn't even care about her Anie."
"You think so?" as she replied to me I heard keys from the front door "Oh, he's back. Gotta go."
I was hiding in my room behind closed doors. I heard Yoongi shut the door behind himself loudly then with a heavy sigh he dropped his bag on the floor. I was sure he must be exhausted from working overtime today, though I must tell him that Dia came here looking for him. My insides were on fire from jealousy, it wouldn't be a good idea to talk with him in this state of mind, yet when he knocked on my door I couldn't help but open it with a grim face.
His silver hair was all over the place, huge bags under his eyes. I felt sorry for him, he needed some rest today.
"I'm adrift in a sea of bitterness," he said in a monotone voice.
"You're a bloody drama queen is what you are," I said while rolling my eyes playfully.
"The kids completely obliterated me today, I can barely stand."
"Then lay down and I will give you some milk."
I smiled at him, but as soon as I turned around to go to the kitchen my smile dropped, worry plastered all over my face. Swallowing was hard because of the lump that formed in my throat. I was feeling truly shitty, there's no way I can tell him about Dia when I'm this mad for no reason.
I was chewing on my lower lip softly while pouring the cold milk in his favourite matte black mug. With a sad sigh, I put it in the microwave when out of nowhere Yoongi touched the back of my neck. I yelped turning around to face him.
"I knew something was up with you," his voice was only a mutter "What happened while I was gone?"
"What makes you think I'm not okay?" I tried giggling, but my voice cracked mid-way, giving my emotions away.
"One would think that after so many weeks you already know that you can't fool my senses. Nor my emotions." he came closer, trapping me between his hands.
"A girl named Dia was here." I licked my chapped lips, paying close attention to his reaction "Said that she called you several times and you didn't pick up."
He stared at me intently for a few seconds before closing his eyes. Yoongi took a deep breath and stepped back, giving me more space to move. I couldn't read his emotions from his facial expression at all, and he avoided eye-contact like his life depended on it.
"I'm aggressively ignoring that part of my life until it goes away."
"It doesn't work too well."
He looked at me with a sleepy expression. I never noticed how he looked much paler than usual, his face almost resembled the time when I first met him and bought him home. I furrowed my eyebrows and opened my mouth to tell him to go to sleep, but he answered me faster.
"I will sort it out with her."
"If you don't want her anymore just tell her." time seemed to slow down as this sentence left my lips involuntarily. It was too late to turn back now.
"Do you think I give a fuck about her existence?" I was taken aback by how aggressive he sounded "I could smell her stench from miles away, I knew she was here even before I opened the door. She has no shame."
"Did she say anything to you?" I was almost shaking, I've never seen him this outraged over something before. Until now he kept his cool about everything.
"N-nothing worth mentioning."
"You're a bad liar." his voice audibly softened "I'll be back."
I watched him stretch out his limbs before going out again. That was the last time I saw him for days. I thought he would come back home a few hours later with a lighter heart but instead, he was out for almost three days. He wasn't showing up at his work either, so they called me with a worried voice, that's when I decided to call him and search for him before going to authorities. I knew he could just wander around in cat form in the city, but I tried to keep a positive mind about it while Rae helped me the best way she could.
He wasn't picking up his phone, and after a whole day of calling him, it went to the voice message, which meant his phone probably died. I was close to crying, that's when I decided to go out and search for him at every place I knew he liked, which wasn't too many. I asked around at the shops, cafe's but in vain, no one saw him these days. As a last resort, I thought he might be at the park which we visited not too long ago, but it took me almost four hours to walk around and search for him there.
This was ridiculous, almost two days ago he said he'd be back soon and now he vanished from the face of the earth like he never existed. I knew it wasn't uncommon with cat hybrids and shifters to get away for a few days, but this time it was strange. He had work to attend and we didn't have a fight that would incline him to run away. Was he even running away? What if his last owners found him and took him away? What if things went wrong with Dia and they had a huge fight? A lump formed in my throat. Or worse, what if they realized they love each other and decided to be together and now Yoongi is too afraid to tell me?
By the time I arrived home I was exhausted emotionally and physically. My heart felt heavy, I decided to ask for advice from Clara, she knew shifters and hybrids more than I knew. Maybe she could tell me something that would calm me down before I go to the authorities. It was already far too late to call her, so I would just have to wait until tomorrow morning with this.
I slumped into the kitchen chair hiding my face with my hands as I sobbed silently. This was a disaster. I didn't know if I should be worried or not, was this normal with cat shifters? Even though his boss called me too? I remember he wore the pink collar when he left the apartment but that can be easily taken off by anyone.
I decided it was for the best if I go and take a hot shower, it might wash my sadness away. I tried everything, and it's not up to me from this point.
Hello beautiful people of the internet!
Here's a new chapter for you, and the next one shall be an ending episode ;) Don't kill me over this, hope you enjoy! Comments are welcomed in this household.
At first, I thought I was dreaming, so I didn't even bother to open my eyes when I heard the sound of rustling. My body felt heavy and hot at the same time, I knew something wasn't right with me. I grimaced when I opened my eyes, this felt like a fever. The thought crossed my mind that maybe I shouldn't have dressed so carelessly outside since the weather was slightly chilly. I knew I could only blame myself in this situation.
For a second I forgot all about the noises coming from the front door, I only got the duvet off of me when the door was slammed open. I gathered all the strength that was left in me to walk to my bedroom's door and check what happened. My sixth sense was telling me Yoongi came back, and once I peeked out of my door my suspicion was spot on. He was standing there in the same outfit he left, his hair dirty and eyes scanning the apartment in mistrust. I quickly noticed the dark circles around his orbs and how he looked more tired than I was.
"Has been somebody here?" he asked in an icy tone that I never heard before.
"No," I answered weakly, my voice was rough because of the cold. "Where were you?
"I'm sorry, did I scare you?" he completely changed his approach again, slowly walking towards me "Are you sick?"
"Think so." I replied immediately, rather interested in another subject "Where were you?"
"I got rid of Dia but got my hands full with a bigger problem. I'll explain later, get back to bed, you're heating up." Yoongi gently pressed his forehand on my forehead, it was cold on my burning skin "Come on."
"No buts, you have a crazy fever, I'll give you some medicine. Where do you keep them?"
"Last drawer in the kitchen."
I felt miserable as he helped me back in my warm bed. Breathing was difficult and overall I was looking forward to a day filled with resting. Under normal circumstances, I would have been pissed off because of Yoongi, but right now I just felt extremely exhausted and grateful he was safe. I had no idea about the time, nor can I remember when I woke up to take the disgusting medicine that Yoongi almost forced down my throat. All I know is that when I woke up everything was dark, still. First thing I noticed was Yoongi in his cat form, sleeping soundly on top of my duvet. My eyes still hurt slightly, but I felt much better.
I had the intention to go to the lavatory and take a steamy shower, so I gently got out of bed, careful not to wake him up. On my way with a towel, I took another sour pill, that's when I noticed the clock on the wall, it was 8 PM. Scoffing I turned around, did I just really sleep all day? Without even waking up? This is ridiculous.
I probably took the longest shower in history, because when I finished and left the bathroom Yoongi was in his human form, his body spread out on his bed. He looked at me with a bored expression, reminding me as a joke that water is not cheap.
"I'm so mad at you Min Yoongi." I answered in a serious tone, so he'd know I'm not fooling around this time "What were you thinking? I was ready to call the police on you!"
"I'm sorry. I was running away." he got up from his bed to a sitting position, head hanging low.
"From who? Me? Dia? A serious discussion?"
"Remember when I first came here? Seems like it was such a long time ago. I can remember vividly, it was probably the best day of my life and the worst one at the same time." I opened my mouth to reply but shut it quickly when I realized I didn't know what to say "I didn' tell you lots of things. Felt like it would be for the best, you know? Some things left unsaid..."
"I don't understand you." honesty seemed like the best policy in this situation. He smiled weakly, looking up with glimmering eyes, was he about to cry, or the light made it seem that way? My own eyes started to sting just from the thought that he is emotionally hurt.
"I don't make sense, do I? Sorry about that, I'm just dancing around the subject because I guess I'm too afraid to open up to you. I wasn't gone because of you, no matter what you do I will be always by your side, you better remember that. Don't you ever think otherwise, I'd never leave you willingly."
"Then why didn't you at least call? Or text? I was worried sick about you." it took me guts to ask these questions that were in my mind for more than a day "You had your phone with you for a day. And after that the battery died, but before-"
"After I went to Dia and explained to her to leave me alone I walked back here when I saw them."
His facial expression changed. His usual warm brown eyes turned completely yellow, mouth coming to an angry scowl.
"The owners I had before. They were walking down the street right in front of me, the old hag and her disgusting husband. I had to run away but they saw me before I could turn away. You can only imagine what happened next."
"Did they hurt you?" I gasped loudly, the rage inside of me was unbearable. If they did something to him I will make them pay, that's for sure. They caused him enough suffering by now.
"They wanted to talk. But it got ugly fast. I had to go to the police to make a statement and explain to them that I have a new owner. I wanted to call you but they wouldn't let me. They were keeping me there like a hostage, questioning me and doing their damn paperwork. It felt like I was the problem there, not those idiots."
"That's unfair, why would they do that when you already have an owner?! This is insane, they-"
"Calm down." Yoongi quickly got up from his seat and gently grabbed my shoulders to shake me "You're still sick."
"I don't care, this is unfair. They should go to jail to what they did to you! Why is the police so useless, this makes me furious!"
"I know, this is why I never bothered to go there. If it was about a human then they'd be on the case faster. This is how the world works for me Yuu."
I didn't try to hold myself back. I was enraged and I had every right to feel this way. Yoongi went through hell and back because of these people and even now they were trying to make things harder for him. We are really living in a world where people don't care about hybrids and shifters, and this was something hard for me to comprehend. I fought my hardest so Yoongi can forget about them, yet somehow they made their way back into his life when I wasn't around.
I opened my mouth to voice my worries when out of nowhere I started to cough horribly. Yoongi's eyebrows furrowed, a pout slowly forming on his lips, he quickly led me towards my bedroom doing his best to calm me down.
"Don't argue, get in bed and heal," he ordered in a serious tone, yet he gently tucked me in just like a parent would.
I struggled to fall asleep since I slept through almost a whole day. My thoughts were also running wild in my head and I did little to stop them. Eventually, I must have passed out, because the next day I woke up to the sunrise. I had a lot of explaining to do to Yoongi's boss that day, and Rae was also going berserk, calling me every half an hour. She had no idea he returned and I was ill.
More than a few days had to pass for me to completely heal and regain my strength. Yoongi was next to me throughout the whole process and took care of me in a way that made my heart melt. He gave me tea every few hours and talked with me when I slept too much and I was unable to fall asleep. We watched lots of movies and by the third day I already felt much better but I refused to admit this to him. I basically bathed in his love and affection, which gave me the impression that he might like me more than a friend. I knew how impossible that is, to begin with since we never talked about our feelings openly. Ever. I had no idea what is he thinking and how he feels towards me, that is why I decided to completely ignore my intuition and pretend I'm unapproachable. This idea seemed the best, yet it only lasted for a couple of days. It was the strangest experience I've had with him, Yoongi from one way to another started to be cold towards me without any reason.
Yoongi is normally kind and likes a friendly banter here and there, though when I arrived home from a particularly hard course he didn't even greet me. His headphones were in and he watched a movie. I tried to get his attention by waving my hand around in front of his face, but his reaction took me aback. All he did was shoo me off and scoff at my childish ways. With a pout, I walked into my room not really thinking much into it, that is until he continued to act this way towards me for a while. I couldn't take this any longer, I needed help from Rae once again.
We decided to go to a small pub near my university. It was usually filled with students and this afternoon was the same. The walls were covered in old-school drawings and paintings. The decorations were simple and it seemed like it has been the same for ages. It had a good vibe to it, even though the place was extremely old and looked run down. Because of the huge windows, we had enough light, it would have been ten times creepier if it was dim-lit, especially since the wooden floor made a strange sound every time you took a step on it.
"I'm going to say this for the 100th time Anie. Just talk with him, it's that simple." she sighed, leaning back on her chair "You will never know what he's thinking unless you ask."
"I agree, but I'm a coward and you know it."
"I know, but is this really the time to be a chicken? Something is going on with him and if you're curious all you need to do is ask him."
"How do I bring it up? Casually ask him if he's crushing on me and doesn't know how to deal with it? Or maybe it would be better to ask him head-on if I made something that ticked him off?"
"Leave your sarcasm home, buddy, I just want to help." she roughly pinched my side, as if trying to wake me up from a daze "I can be your emotional support while you do it tonight."
"Tonight?" my voice got suddenly high pitched, giving away how scared I was "No way."
"Yes way. Until when are you going to keep this facade going on? Better clear this mess as soon as possible."
I grabbed my beer and took a huge gulp out of it, the sour taste making me slightly scrunch my nose. I didn't usually drink this beverage, but today I needed some extra courage with Yoongi. Poor guy probably had no idea what we were plotting in a shady, secluded part of a pub. Rae lifted up my spirits with her speech, that went on while I walked to my shared apartment with Yoongi. Her messages were long, and even though I left her only one-line replies, that were usually pessimistic, she still had the patience to keep my head up.
Before I entered our home I left one last message, that finally sounded positive. When I opened the door it hit me. This was fucked up. Our whole friendship felt like that for the past couple of weeks. One minute it was cold then the next it was back to normal yet again like nothing happened. I never knew there were any risks when I started to be friends with a shifter, even though everyone around me warned me that this might be too difficult. Maybe I just wanted to show them that it was possible, but as time went by I realized that the real problem wasn’t exactly that he was a shifter, it was the fact that feelings got in the way like it always does. Because he was a shifter it only made things even more challenging.
As I looked into his eyes I was sure he knew. He could easily smell my worry from miles away, hearing far too sensitive not to notice how my heart was pounding inside of my chest. His animal DNA slowly took over his actions, dark eyes dilating so much it seemed like his chocolate brown orbs turned into jet black. I was in trouble. I knew the smartest decision would be to make a run for it, so I quickly turned around, but it was futile. He grabbed my hand quickly, shoving me to our living room’s wall, coming closer to my neck. His cold nose touched my heated up skin, making my breath hitch. He took a deep breath, one hand resting right next to my head, while the other one still held my arm firmly, no intention of letting it go.
“I’m sorry.” he mumbled, breath tickling my neck “I’m trying to hold back.”
“Try harder,” I replied in a weak tone.
Rather than saying something, he just licked my neck.
I only realized how Yoongi was in rut again. I never paid close attention when was the time for him to be in rut, that is why I was frozen in place as he licked a long stripe on my neck starting from the side until my chin.
"You smell divine." he murmured in a low tone I've never heard before.
"You should go to a hotel." my voice cracked.
"I can fuck you senseless here too."
My eyes widened at his statement, and so did his. He stumbled backwards like he woke up from a daze, his yellow orbs shining through his half-lidded eyes. He flicked his tongue across his chapped bottom lip, and I involuntarily thought how nice it would be to feel his body close to mine again. There was no denying in, the sexual tension between us was palpable in the air, I was sure he could sense it too.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say those things." he stuttered with a shocked facial expression. "I should-"
Yoongi couldn't finish his sentence. His nostrils visibly widened as he took a deep breath letting out a voracious growl in the process. The sound made my stomach clench in delight, even though I tried my best not to show how turned on I was.
"You're wet," with the speed of a light he suddenly appeared in front of me, face mere centimetres away from my neck "I could smell it from miles away."
I grabbed his shirt and pulled his body closer to mine because I was craving him badly at this point. He grinded his hips against my crotch roughly, his moan sounded like music to my ears. My fingers automatically came to his locks to softly pull on them, while he was attacking my neck mercilessly with bites and kisses. The room quickly filled with my whining and his sloppy kisses on my neck and collarbones. I knew bruises would form on the place his lips touched, and I wanted nothing more than to be covered in them, so I'd never forget this moment.
Yoongi moved his right leg right between my legs and forcefully pushed my crotch against it while grabbing my waist. His fingertips wandered across my bare skin underneath my shirt as I tried to get friction of pleasure. With a quick motion, he unclasped my bra and helped me out of my shirt and underwear. He wasted no time his lips coming in contact with my burning skin eagerly, as his hand massaged my breasts.
"I just want to be inside you." he breathed next to my ear "I'm sorry, can I?"
The Yoongi I know would probably never skip foreplay just because he can't control his needs, though the man in front of me is another side of him I never got to see. He was impatient and rough, driven by lust and nothing more. There was no denying it, he acted on his instincts alone.
I took a sharp breath when I felt his hand unbutton my jeans so his hand could fit inside. I let out a loud moan when his fingers brushed across my soaked panties.
"Fuck, you're so ready," he pushed roughly my undergarment to the side, slowly inserting his middle and ring finger inside of me "Can I fuck you? Please, please, fuck, I want you here and now."
"Me too," I grabbed his hand, boring my nails deep into his arm.
Ha hurriedly took out his hand only to suddenly stop for a second. A sheen of need coated his two fingers and his palm that was pressed against my heat. His focus landed on his right hand, examining it with keen eyes, then bringing it to his mouth. My stomach clenched when I saw him lick his fingers and palm clean, all the while making lewd noises. My heat was uncontrollably throbbing by now, all I needed was Yoongi to bury himself in me and fuck me into the mattress.
As if he was reading my mind, he started to undress quickly.
"I'm sorry Yuu, I've got to have you fast and rough. I need that." he breathed hard while kicking his trousers to the side "Get on the bed and leave your panties on. I promise I'll make it up to you if I'm too rough."
I never felt so excited to have sex in my whole life as I climbed on top of his bed, awkwardly getting out of my way too tight jeans. My eyes landed on his body as soon as I turned around. He took off all of his clothes, slowly climbing into the bed like a predator chasing its prey. My throat went completely dry when I saw his member pulsate with need and I couldn't stop myself from gently touching it. He closed his eyes, head falling back in pleasure, as I started to move my hand up and down his thick shaft. I wondered for a second if I could have a quick taste before he'd enter me.
I played a little with the tip, massaging the precum all over it while my body involuntarily pressed against his. With my free hand, I grabbed his hair and pulled him closer to me so I could plant soft kisses across his already sweaty neck.
I yelped when out of nowhere he pressed me against the mattress with all of his weight, opening my legs completely.
"I can't wait any longer."
"Yoongi wait! You need a condom." I stuttered with huge eyes.
"Shit." he cursed like a sailor while he grabbed one of his bags roughly and pulled out a box then, to my surprise, a cherry flavoured lube.
In a few seconds, the condom was already on his member and I stared at it pressing my lips together, no way that could fit in me. With lust-filled eyes, he pulled my panties to the side and proceeded to grind his dick against my heat. The moan that left my lips was the loudest one so far, I couldn't wait to feel him already pounding in me. My patience was running thin while he took his time with the lube.
"Yoongi." his yellow orbs looked deep into my eyes, waiting "Please hurry."
"Eager, are we?" he asked with a cocky smirk forming on his lips.
My core clenched around the tip deliciously. He could easily enter by now if he wanted to, but he abruptly stopped, taking a sharp breath. I've never seen anything as erotic as this before. He dug his nails roughly into my tights and entered me slowly, even though I could see in his eyes, he wanted nothing more than to fuck me mercilessly. His shaft stretched out my walls to a point where I had to bite down on my lip just so I wouldn't whimper. Either way, his senses must have caught on that it hurt, because next thing I knew, he was slowly coming down on my level. His hot body pressed against mine, while his hands held my legs apart.
"I can barely hold back."
Yoongi's voice came out strangled. I knew he must be in lots of pain. I knew shifters in rut wanted nothing else but to mate and fuck until their rut went away after a few days.
My walls clenched around him again as I realized he was in rut and he wanted to be with me this time and no one else.
"It's okay. You can move." I whispered in a barely audible voice.
His eyes bore into mine before he pulled me roughly into him, ramming his dick into me at an already fast pace. I almost choke on air as I tried to find something I could hold onto, but the only thing that was close enough was his own body. I quickly clung onto his back moaning loudly into his ear every time he pushed his member back into my warm walls. The lewd sounds blended together with my whining and his ragged breathing. I felt tears pick at my eyes from pleasure and pain, he was definitely rough but it felt so good when his cock shoved against my sweetest spot. His pelvis rubbed against my clit, edging me closer to my orgasm, I knew I would cum soon if he didn't stop.
"Yoongi, this is so good," I whispered into his neck.
"You want more, my angel?" he asked between two breaths "I can give you more."
"Yes, yes, please!"
He harshly grabbed my legs and put them around his back, pounding in me at an incredible speed. I had to bite down onto his neck, as tears started to roll down on my cheeks, the pleasure was unbearable and my body started to shake, as I came undone beneath him. He cursed right next to my ear, licking my neck and leaving more hickeys, while I tried to hold onto him.
He screamed lustily as his movements became sloppy. I could feel him cumming, slowing down slightly until he completely stopped.
"I'm sorry, this will hurt a lot," Yoongi whispered next to my ear.
At first, my eyebrows furrowed in confusion, but soon enough I knew that he was talking about. As the tip of his penis inside of me steadily became larger, I also dug my fingers harder into his back, biting down into his neck to stifle my cries. I was afraid I might have hurt him in the process, but he let out a low hum.
My whimpering slowly ceased completely, while he gingerly caressed my face with his fingertips.
"I'm sorry Yuu. I lost control. I shouldn't have done this, I'm so ashamed." his voice was laced with so many emotions, but I could only make out fear and hurt.
"It's okay, I wanted this too," I mumbled sleepily, hoping that we will have this discussion later, but he didn't budge.
"I should have told you. It wasn't fair that I just attacked you, like an animal."
"You just followed your instincts, because you were in rut. I understand."
"Kiss me, please."
His member was inside of me, rock hard, and the tip of it still painfully enlarged. His eye colour went back to deep brown, while he looked at me sheepishly. His personality changed drastically, the Yoongo I knew was back again, with a dusty pink blush across his cheeks. He smiled softly before leaning down, plush lips brushing shily against mine. It was hard to believe that this is the same person I just fucked with. My roommate, whom I have been living with for months now, and also the guy that I fell uncontrollably in love with.
His kiss was innocent and magical, entirely different from how he acted only a few minutes ago. He left soft pecks and moved his mouth gently against mine, cupping my cheeks with his hands. I held his body close to mine, hugging him with my legs, enjoying this wonderful moment to the fullest.
Needless to say, the relationship between us changed drastically starting from that day. He got three days off from work like he always does when he is in rut. I decided to not go to any of my courses during that period just so I could be with him. Most of the time we fucked several times a day, that is until I couldn't take it anymore and I'd rather gave him blowjobs. I never knew I was so out of shape until now.
"Wake up, we ran out of milk again."
"Wonder who's at fault," I mumbled in a groggy voice, still sleepy.
"You drink too much milk with your coffee."
It was weekend and I needed to rest, but Yoongi woke me up against my will. His hands pulled me closer to him, my back flat against his chest. I smiled to myself, hoping that he wouldn't notice how gone I was for his affectionate side. The low purring sound that came from him made me realize he was content just as much as I was.
"We can go down later," I mumbled, hiding underneath the warm duvet.
"Did I really tire you out this much?" I could feel his smug smile through his voice. I turned around to face him just so I could glare playfully in his eyes.
"My body wasn't exactly made to be ruined."
"But you did like it, you were screaming for more, and-"
"Shut up!" I rolled on top of him, squishing him with my weight.
Instead of throwing me off, like he always did, he sneaked his hands around my waist and hugged me back, purring louder. A side of me wished to discuss what just happened a few days ago, but the larger side of me understood it without needing any explanation. His body language and the way he acted towards me spoke louder than words could ever. I loved him dearly and so did he, he told me with every touch, smile and action.
Hello there, loves!
Thank you for reading this story to the end, and thank you for all the people who commented : ) I hope you all enjoyed it, I absolutely loved this story, it was probably my first ever truly fluff story...well...at least most of the parts were soft. Thank you again!