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I'm Wrecking This Evening Already And Loving Every Minute Of It

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I'm the new cancer, never looked better, you can't stand it

Because you say so under your breath

You're reading lips, "When did he get all confident?"

Haven't you heard that I'm the new cancer?

Never looked better and you can't stand it

– There's a Good Reason These Tables Are Numbered Honey, You Just Haven't Thought of It Yet by Panic! At the Disco


Grimm is never allowed to attend the Radiance's ball. It only occurs every one hundred years and it's a celebration and get together for all Higher Beings of Hallownest and the surrounding kingdoms. A show of goodwill and to encourage prosperity for the coming years. She never ceases to remind everyone how important it is.

And Grimm is forbidden every. single. time. from going. 

The Radiance has a collection of excuses every time. He would get into trouble. He has a taste for the dramatic and she just can't deal with it. He'll ruin everything from the party itself to the delicate balance of the various agreements that keep the gods from going to war with each other. She’s actually tried to say he could cause the apocalypse. He could, sure, but he wouldn’t! He just wants to dance and get free food.

Maybe take someone home with him.

"I'm a god too," he growls. Usually he doesn't bother to put up such a big fight but he's sick of her acting like she is better than him. 

"Exactly," she counters easily, "A god of the dream realm. One of us has to stay behind and watch it. And it's my party, little brother."

They are twins. She only calls him little when she is getting ready to just walk away. She keeps an even tone despite her own growing agitation. Grimm just barely manages not to stomp his foot like a child. It would only prove her point. 

"The realm will not collapse after one night of us not keeping an eye on it." They both know that's true. They've both left the realm alone on multiple occasions. Each when they were meant to be the one watching it. They are both rather good at ignoring the realm when they want to.

She bristles slightly and he notices. "No. And that's final," her tone is dark and done. It’s so rare to see her like this. She knows something he doesn’t and he hates that.

Grimm could leave it there but he crosses his arms, "Do I embarrass you that much, dear sister?" He spits the words with venom. 

She narrows her eyes, weighing her options. She could lie or she could be brutally honest. You know what she hasn’t done lately? Been brutally honest. “That is exactly what you do.”

Grimm blinks. He hadn’t actually expected her to just say it . "Well, that's not very nice," he scoffs.

"Please write a play about it," she turns away, signaling she is done talking about it.

Grimm huffs, "I don't see how any of the other gods can put up with you."

"Easy," she says, back still to him, "I'm not you."

With that, The Radiance leaves him to sulk.

And sulk he does. She always treats him like he's fragile or naive. He doesn't care about the politics of godhood and the idea of having vast, sprawling kingdoms of worshipers never interested him. He's not a child but she is intent on treating him as one. Sometimes she claims she's protecting him.

Grimm growls and throws open the door to his huge closet.

If she won't invite him, he will invite himself. Just this once he will disobey his sister. And he will have the time of his life doing it.

It's not a masquerade ball but that doesn't stop Grimm from wearing the most eye catching mask he can. That, paired with the most extravagant suit he owns, is sure to catch eyes. If he's not invited, he will simply crash it. The Radiance thinks he'll embarrass her and steal the spotlight? Then he will do just that. He's absolutely boiling with rage but, damn, does he look good. 

He makes sure the ball is in full swing before he sneaks in through an upper window. The food smells delightful but the sound of music makes his shell tingle with excitement. He slips through the shadows until he gets to the ballroom, eyes wide as he takes in all the people. He’s never seen so many gods in one place. The air is alive with energy. Even when they have political meetings, it’s never this . There is little tension and instead just the power of multiple gods intermingling. He knew many by name and not by appearance. 

He steps out towards the dance floor, itching to show off. And that’s when he first smells them.

It's like the first frost, with a thick, underlying scent he can't place. It nearly knocks the wind out of his lungs. He wants more.

Grimm blinks and his shell feels hot and tight. He almost thinks his heat started early. The smell is like nothing he had ever experienced before. It’s intoxicating and addicting. He legs shake as his gaze sweeps across the floor. The crowd seems to almost part on command and he finds himself staring into the most beautiful set of eight eyes he’s ever seen. 

Or at least that's how we would describe it, if he were writing a play. Really they just tower above most of the crowd. His sister hadn’t told him the God of Gods is hot .

Oh . That’s why the Radiance didn’t want him to come to these.

The Shade Lord sees him too, eyes wide and shocked. A purple tint colors their cheeks and Grimm smirks. He knew the Shade Lord would be invited, but he guesses he never realized that the two of them might have...a connection . A connection that the Radiance obviously anticipated and wanted to stop from ever happening. She had a very rocky alliance with the Shade Lord and Grimm knew from her loud complaining that she only invited them to keep some semblance of peace. 

It makes sense though. Life, death and rebirth. The three of them were meant to keep each other in check. If the Radiance and the Shade Lord hate each other because they were opposite, it is logical to assume that Grimm and the Shade Lord would have an innate attraction. 

They cross the room to him in a few long strides and Grimm is staring at their hips. They are in a more simple suit but it fits tightly to their torso. They have thick, good looking thighs. He has to force his eyes up to meet theirs. 

“King of Nightmares, correct?” Their voice is low, barely there, as they hold out their hand. It's like it's in his head, under his shell and he wants to hear more of it.

“Just Grimm is fine,” he chuckles, taking their hand. It’s cold and he has to force himself not to shudder. Grimm brings their hand up to his mouth to kiss it. A barely audible growl leaves the Shade Lord.

This would be too much fun.

The two of them move to the dance floor, Grimm tries to lead at first but the Shade Lord quickly turns it around. Grimm is too shocked to protest. It doesn’t take long for the whispers to start, just barely noticeable over the music. The God of Gods didn’t dance. Not until now. Not until Grimm. He had wanted to take the spotlight and this sure had done it. He can’t help but smirk, pressing himself closer.

“I don’t think I’ve seen you here before,” the Shade Lord whispers and their lower set of hands ghost over his ass just barely. The God of Gods is getting handsy. Grimm knows they're staring and he can practically feel their heart pounding.

Grimm pretends not to notice, but his heart is beating just as fast. “I’m not exactly invited,” his arms around their neck tighten, his claws brushing against their horns. 

They laugh and the sound makes Grimm's shell tingle, “The Radiance doesn’t invite her own brother?”

“I think this is what she was trying to prevent…” Grimm murmurs, leaning up to brush his fangs against theirs. He feels them shudder and they go to kiss him. He pulls back, eyes hooded. “You’re missing your steps. Don’t embarrass me, now.” 

A rumble leaves their chest and it makes heat pool in Grimm's abdomen. They try very hard to focus on their footing then but it's hard with Grimm casually feeling them up. His claws move down their arms before wrapping back around their neck and his hot breath is on their neck. The Shade Lord can't remember a time they've ever felt this at ease with someone else. 

Or a time they had ever been aroused like this. Their trousers are much too tight already. 

They let their hands wander, distracted by the heat that seems to be coming off of him. He's warm and they can't get enough. They've never felt warm like this before. Grimm takes the opportunity to take lead of the dance, dipping them down and brushing their fangs together. 

And that’s when he meets the Radiance’s eyes. 

Grimm smirks and the Shade Lord notices, glancing back behind them right as he pulls them upright. They can’t help but blink, before a smirk spreads across their face as well. Her face is something neither of them will forget, confused and livid . They both know she won’t do anything that would ruin the ball. The Shade Lord loves it. If they had known it had been so easy to get under her skin, they would have found Grimm ages ago.

“She looks pissed,” the Shade Lord whispers, taking hold of Grimm’s hip and casually bringing him to dance a bit closer. They look down at him, taking in every curve and angle of his body. His suit is well tailored and clings to him in all the right ways. The Shade Lord thinks it would look better off of him, though. 

"You're staring," Grimm whispers, his own hand ghosting across their ass, pulling them tightly against him. He's starting to get hard too and makes it known to them. He can't help but notice, that with their height difference, he could probably undo their pants with his mouth by leaning down. 

"So are you," the Shade Lord counters. 

"Want to see if we can make her red?"

"Of course. I think red is becoming my favorite color."

He winks and then quickly pulls them down by the horns. The Shade Lord growls in surprise but as soon as Grimm's mouth meets theirs, they melt into the kiss. Even with all the teasing and touching, they didn't expect Grimm to actually  kiss them.

And what a first kiss it is. 

The Shade Lord's mind goes blank and Grimm's mouth is hot against theirs. They dig their claws into his hips and he slips his tongue into their mouth. They can't help but groan, his taste driving them mad. They can't get enough and they feel burning hot for the first time in their existence. Grimm hooks a leg around their waist, pressing his tongue in deeper. They grab his thigh, shifting him closer, claws digging in. He ruts against them slightly, a low purr leaving his throat. 

The song changes. Someone clears their throat. Grimm eases away, albeit reluctantly, smirking. 

The Radiance is frozen in place, as stiff as a statue. Her face burns with anger and frustration. Her brother is all but fucking the God of Gods, her eternal enemy, on the dance floor of her own ball. Her gaze is murderous and Grimm shoots her a knowing look as he slips out of the Shade Lord's grip. Then he reaches over and puts his hand on their ass, turning them both away from the crowd. 

"Want to get a drink? All this dancing has left me thirsty."

The Shade Lord blinks, completely in a haze. They had forgotten where they were. But they did know, if that’s what Grimm considered dancing , they were desperate to find out what having sex with him is like. As soon as that thought cross their mind, they blush profusely. They had never, ever, been one to think like that. Especially with someone they just met.

But there is something about Grimm that has them dying to be closer. 

They hold out one of their arms for Grimm, who eagerly takes it, and lead him to the refreshments. He grabs a glass of wine and picks at the snacks before leaning against the table and looking over at the Shade Lord, his eyes hooded. 

"Thank you," Grimm says easily, taking a drink. The Shade Lord brushes against him not so subtly as they get a small pinwheel sandwich for themselves.

"For what?"

"For allowing me to see that look on the Radiance's face. If she kills me in my sleep, know that it was worth it."

"She can't kill you if you come home with me," they whisper.

Grimm's eyes widen and he can’t help but let out a pleased growl. Are they inviting him to go home with them? His body feels much too hot at the idea. "Careful or you'll catch her ire too."

They both laugh, knowing full well that they both have already done that and then some. They lock eyes, both smiling and the sound of each other's laughter is contagious. 

"One more dance?" Grimm asks hopefully, finishing his wine. The current song is much slower than before. 

The Shade Lord can't turn him down.

They nod, holding out their hand again. They pause, though, when they turn back towards the dance floor. 

“Are you sure?” They ask, eyeing him. The floor is cleared out, only the Radiance and her chosen date dancing across the floor. It’s the dance of the hour and everyone is watching. The floor is reserved for the Radiance and her special guests. Grimm smirks up at them.

Of course ,” he purrs dangerously. His red eyes flash playfully and the Shade Lord is in love .

The Shade Lord leads again, all eyes turning to them as he brings Grimm to the dance floor. Technically they were considered a special guest. The Radiance almost drops her partner. Grimm flashes her a deadly smirk, wrapping his arms around the Shade Lord’s neck and not so subtly rubbing his hips against them. Their breath catches. 

“Grimm,” they whisper, “You are having too much fun with this.”

“Aren’t you?” He looks up at them, eyes narrowed into happy silts. The Shade Lord swallows, claws digging into his hips. They are much more confident leading him even with the teasing and it only makes Grimm want to amp it up. 

Yes ,” they say, breathless. Seeing the Radiance’s face is only second to the very attractive man in their arms. They knead their claws into his ass, keeping him pressed against them.

He replies by nipping not so softly at their neck. A low growl rumbles from their chest. The two of them do a lazy circle around the dance floor, keeping pace with the Radiance and putting on quite the show with wandering hands. While Grimm teases their neck with his mouth, the Shade Lord glances up to smile at the Radiance. When the two dancing couples brush past enough other, Grimm can practically feel the rage flowing from his sister. Her feathers are bristling and on edge. She’s fluffed up twice as big.

“Thanks again for inviting me,” the Shade Lord bows their head to her, making a big show of shifting their leg between Grimm’s and guiding him with their hands on his ass rather than on his hips. Grimm chuckles hoarsely. 

“I’m going to kick you both out if you don’t stop this nonsense,” she snarls.

Grimm opens his mouth to reply but the Shade Lord quickly spins their dance around, moving them away. He looks up at them, pouting, and they can’t help but lean down to kiss him. 

The world spins again when they feel the heat of his tongue pushing past their fangs as he deepens the kiss almost instantly. Grimm doesn’t hold back from exploring every crevice of their mouth as if their saliva is the richest wine. He pulls back quickly, though, and the Shade Lord can’t help but notice they are both panting. Grimm’s temperature is suddenly much higher and theirs has dropped. 

They can feel his heart pounding and he rolls his hips against them so they can feel how hard he is. 

"How about I give you a… more private dance," Grimm looks at him hopefully, his cheeks tinted pink.

The Shade Lord can only nod eagerly, face flustered.

“Hold on tight, then,” Grimm growls. There’s a puff of red smoke. It smells like cinnamon. One way to let literally everyone know that they are leaving.

Of course, with how worked up Grimm has been since he very first saw the Shade Lord, he can’t teleport them very far.

Then the Shade Lord finds themselves shoved against a wall in a dark room. Grimm all but tears open their suit, claws hungrily exploring their cold body underneath. They throw back their head and groan, untucking Grimm’s top to rub their hands up his back. 

They open their eyes, intent on carrying him to the bed. Only to find there isn't a bed. Just. Clothes.

“You teleported us to a… closet,” they whisper, finally able to comprehend where they are. It smells like mothballs but it’s quickly overpowered by their own arousal.

“Do you know how hard it is to teleport when I’m this horny? You are lucky we didn’t end up in a whole different kingdom,” He leans up to kiss them again, fingers already working on the buttons of their trousers.

"Take that dumb mask off," the Shade Lord pants, a void tendril pushing him back. He huffs, pulling off the mask and throwing it somewhere behind both of them before grabbing one of their horns to tug them down into a rough kiss. 

They melt into the kiss briefly before pulling him back again. The pout on his lips would have made them laugh if they weren’t suddenly speechless by seeing him without the mask. They take his head into their hands, admiring him with absolute adoration. They trace his cheekbones and the lines over his eyes.

"You are… very beautiful," they breathe, leaning back down to kiss him, softer this time. 

The intimacy of it makes Grimm blush, his fingers suddenly struggling with the buttons of their pants. His heart skips a beat. Sex is one thing but he’s acutely aware of how different the Shade Lord is making him feel.

“Fuck now, make love later,” he says, voice trembling slightly. 

The Shade Lord laughs and the low, static sound of it make Grimm’s shell tingle. They lean back, eyes hooded and roll their hips purposely into him. After enough fumbling, Grimm manages to undo their pants, shoving them down and purring as he strokes their already hard cocks. 

“Just for me?” He coos, trailing kisses down their neck and chest. The Shade Lord’s hip thrust forward blindly, shaking, as they moan. 

“You’re just as hard too,” they palm his crotch to make a point and Grimm growls. 

“So I can skip the foreplay?” One of his hands slips down to rub their slit.

Please ,” they whine in irritation, rocking their hips into his touch, “Isn’t that what we’ve been doing all night?”

“Everyone knows the God of Gods is a virgin, let me at least help you get ready,” Grimm chuckles, easing two claws into their already dripping cunt. Their face burns as they blush, grinding themselves into his hand.

“Shut up and fuck me,” they snarl, “I feel like I’ve been waiting for this my whole existance.”

“Guess my sister is right. The Void is greedy,” he chuckles breathlessly, giving them a sharp thrust of his fingers. They buck their hips with a pleasured hiss. He quickly shoves off his own pants, just as needy. The Shade Lord’s eyes fall to his cock and they lick their lips. Grimm grabs one of their thighs, lifting it up to spread them wide and they reach down to pull him closer. 

He can’t help but tease just a bit more by rubbing his cock against them, slowly. It slips past their wet cunt and slides against their own cocks. The void in them rumbles, practically bubbling. The feeling makes Grimm growl, claws digging into their thigh. He can’t even tease any longer. They are both too drunk off each other to waste any more time and Grimm slips into them with a low groan. Their cold cunt clings to him, pulling him in deeper, and the Shade Lord claws at him desperately. The drastic difference of their body temperatures has them both shaking, wanting to be closer.

Fuck ,” Grimm hisses, pressing his head to their collarbone to try and steady himself. Neither of them had ever felt anything like this. He rolls his hips, grinding into them as the void in them seems to vibrate and stroke him.Their bodies react to each other like never before, seemingly coming alive. 

The Shade Lord cannot even form words, just low gasps and growls as they tilt their hips so he can reach deeper. They wrap their leg around Grimm’s thin waist, rutting against him to meet his thrusts with an almost animalistic need. Grimm fills and stretches them in all the right ways, their inner walls and void melding to each of his ridges. 

Maybe they should be more quiet when they are hidden in a closet just down the hall from the ballroom. But neither of them can even think that clearly. 

He feels his knot swelling and reaches down to stroke their cocks, pushing the two of them together to jerk off at once. They hiss sharply and release two cold loads of cum all over both of them as soon as they feel Grimm's hand around them. Their body tenses with their orgasm and tendrils form in their cunt to squeeze and pet him. He moans, leaning up to kiss them passionately as he shoves his knot into them. He swallows down their pleased growls, tongue pressing past their fangs roughly.

They cling to him with all four of their arms, claws marking him up and catching on his suit. His knot stretches them sore, the barbs rubbing in all the right ways. They are both too far gone, too high on each other. Their natural connection is intoxicating. Their hips clash against each other as they grind as much as they can. 

"Grimm, stop holding back," the Shade Lord groans, voice taunt and clipped, tossing their head back as they knead his ass.

He hadn't even noticed he had been holding back – he didn't want it to end. But as soon as they say the words, his vision blurs and he cums with a loud moan. His seed is so hot, they jerk forward in pleasure. It warms their whole body, leaving them shuddering and close again. 

He doesn't stop thrusting, although he slows just a bit. He kisses and nips at their neck and chest, panting as he starts to work up to another orgasm. 

"Hold on for me," Grimm breathes, taking his hand off their cocks to push himself closer. He reaches up to grab their chin, tugging their head back down to kiss him. 

They nod against him, nipping at his lips. The void in him squeezes his cock as his knots shrinks just enough that he can thrust harder. It's slower but just as rough, a mess of cum and void dripping down between them as his knot recedes. They shudder, straining as they try to hold back their climax. Grimm pulls away from the kiss to press his face to their neck, groaning against them. 

"You're doing good, love. Almost…" 

They whine at his praise, working their inner void around him in a pulsating motion. The sound of him fucking them is loud and wet with the added fluid from their previous orgasms. He shifts, pulling their leg away from his hips to press it against their chest. His movements are erratic and desperate. He can feel their temperature reaching a low and it only causes his to spike. 

“Cum for me, Shade,” he purrs, licking their neck. They obey, cumming hard. Their body spasms, cunt clenching and milking Grimm of his climax at the same time. He moans into their shoulder, holding them as they both shake. They can’t stay standing for long, both sinking to the floor in a heap of tangled limbs as they try and catch their breath. 

There is a long silence as they recover, both just peppering kisses against wherever they can reach on the other. The music from down the hall nearly lulls Grimm to sleep. 

“I’ve never felt… like this before,” the Shade Lord whispers suddenly and then when they realize it probably sounds dumb, they struggle to explain, “I’ve lived eons alone. Always hungry for chaos and destruction and never satisfied. Until now. Until you.”

Grimm chuckles, “I’m better than your hand then?”

They nudge him with a low growl, “ Much better.”

“To be fair, I do love chaos as much as the next god so maybe don’t give up that,” he hums, “But I would gladly be around to satisfy you whenever you need.”

“Well,” they purr, a tone of arrogance in their voice, “I have a huge palace and it’s so very lonely with the throne next of mine empty day after day.”

Grimm’s eyes light up, “Oh~? You’re inviting me to live with you?”

Rule with me,” they correct, smirking. 

“Oh my, wouldn’t that just make the Radiance go ballistic ,” he takes their face into his hands, rubbing their cheeks. He acts like it’s such a hard choice, as if he’s not already in love with the god in front of him. He gives a heavy sigh as if in defeat before chirping, “Of course I will!”


Redressing and exiting a closet with elegance is a tall order but the two gods manage to pull it off. They waltz back into the ballroom as the final dances are winding down for the night and it’s filled with idle chatter. Their arms are linked and the Shade Lord makes sure to bow their head to the Radiance.

Outside they call their carriage and she watches in pure horror as they help Grimm inside.

“See you next time, big sister,” Grimm purrs as the Shade Lord slips in next to him.

The Radiance can only stare with her mouth gaping.