2. Watch a funny video.
He wasn't sleeping though. Sans wasn't quite tired enough yet. It was just the cheap thrill of not having to get out of bed that saw him still in it. He'd been in bed all day long, leaving only to get food and find his phone charger when the battery had dropped below five percent. This was what his life was like when Papyrus went out of town for a few days. Living on the edge.
The remains of dinner – pizza delivery, humans sometimes had the best ideas – was sitting on the floor beside the bed. It made Sans's room smell vaguely greasy. Which was comforting in its own weird way. Kind of reminded him of Grillby's. Something Sans would have gotten had Grillby's delivered.
Sans knew he'd have to put the rest of the pizza in the fridge at some point. He could eat maybe a quarter of the pizza in one sitting even if he loved it. Too much food just made him feel queasy. He never ordered pizza from the little local shop down the street when his brother was home. Papyrus said the sauce tasted too much like spicy ketchup. As far as Sans was concerned, that was a plus.
Currently, Sans was watching videos on his phone. It was another guilty pleasure. Not that he couldn't watch comedy with Papyrus around. He just had to be more... selective of his choices then. Without Papyrus around, Sans could watch all the mean comedy routines he wanted.
"Six weeks, people. Six weeks I've been waiting for them to give me access to this system. A system I need to do my job. And I find out that the only issue was that some guy in IT didn't want to sign a single piece of paper."
"After I told him what had happened, my co-worker replied 'Oh. You've met Speedbump.'"
"I was like 'Speedbump? Why do you call him Speedbump?'
"The guy looked me straight in the eye and said, 'Because the only thing he's good for is slowing everything down.'"
Sans huffed out a laugh at the joke. But something, someone, found that statement even funnier because there was a sharp bark of laughter from under the bed. He froze. That hadn't actually happened... had it?
Before he could think about it and freak out, Sans was scrambling off the bed. He dropped down beside it. Underneath the bed was just shadows. Too many shadows. Was there something there in the darkness?
Nope. Not going to play at that. Sans got back up, teleported to the bathroom, grabbed the flashlight that Papyrus always kept in the top drawer, and teleported back. This time he turned the flashlight on and shined it up under the bed. The shadows disappeared.
Nothing. Well, nothing unexpected. Socks, a pair of shorts, two monster candy wrappers, and a lone soda can that had rolled towards the foot of the bed were all there.
Had the laugh been part of the video? Sans felt a bit ridiculous as he got to his feet, turning the flashlight off in the process. It took him a few minutes to find his phone among all the rucked up blankets, but Sans was eventually successful. He replayed the last minute of the video.
There was no laughter.
It didn’t make sense. None of it made sense. Sans was home alone. There was no one under the bed. And yet, he'd heard someone laugh and that sound came from under his bed.
"maybe i fell asleep." Sans hadn't, but it that seemed more likely than someone being under the bed. He put his phone down on the bedstand. Well, since he was up, he should probably put the pizza away. He'd kicked the box in his haste to look beneath the bed, and Sans walked over to it.
The lid was open. There were only two slices of pizza left in the box.
Sans slept with the flashlight on and pointed under his bed for the rest of the night.