The calendar on their fridge has counted down the days since Hyunjoon left their house for his studies abroad; this isn’t to say Jaehyun hasn’t kept track mentally, because every minute he’s had to spend without his partner in crime, his sentence-finisher, his picky-eater, his terribly persuasive thrill-seeker, the sole light of his life, the boy who holds the keys to all the pleasure he can feel and all the love he can give, has been unbearably painful.
It’s been a month and a week. This morning, he crossed off the final day over his cup of tea, which he can barely finish sitting at the kitchen table alone, in the quiet emptiness devoid of his boyfriend of two years. He can’t video-call him often, because their time-zones almost never align, but Hyunjoon sends him pictures, so many pictures, even if they both know they’re not nearly enough. Jaehyun loves to see them, but he misses him, in the flesh, the way his smile looks in real-time, the way his hair would catch the white sunlight currently streaming sideways through the window, the way he’d only roll over and open his eyes when Jaehyun unearthed him from beneath the blankets and kissed him awake.
Jaehyun’s day goes by in a daze of thinking about what Hyunjoon must be doing, rather than focusing on his midterm exams and looming assignment deadlines. Hyunjoon is packing up and leaving for the airport at Jaehyun’s lunchtime. He’ll be so tired from the jetlag, Jaehyun thinks. He returns Hyunjoon’s pillows to his side of the bed- he’d taken to burying his nose in their fading scent when he can’t sleep- and lays out clothes for him to change into.
Finally, the clock winds down, and it’s time. He’s made it to the airport, his stomach full of butterflies fluttering and ocean-waves churning violently. Hyunjoon, Hyunjoon, Hyunjoon. He sits in the airport benches, alternating between watching the sky darken outside and scanning the arrivals gates, hawk-eyed, peering between the sea of strangers for someone familiar, someone whose face alone can make his heart soar.
Jaehyun blinks, and he’s there. Eyes sharp even when vacant, tall and sinewy and lanky, pink lips pursed, granting him the resting face of someone with much more to complain about than he actually does. It’s part of his charm, as far as Jaehyun is concerned. His heart all but leaps into his throat when Hyunjoon spots him and he can see him resisting himself, resisting breaking into a run and turning heads at the airport. He walks over slowly, and Jaehyun comes to meet him halfway, aching in anticipation, aching to finally close the distance between them.
“Miss me?” Hyunjoon’s opening line is a whisper, but even his voice trembles. Jaehyun pulls him into his arms silently and he can feel Hyunjoon soften, sweeten, relax, melt into him, hugging him back so tightly Jaehyun can barely breathe; it’s not like he was remembering to, anyway.
“So much, Hyunjoon,” Jaehyun whispers, kissing the lobe of his ear.
“I know.” Then, a second later, right before they let go, he adds, “Me more.”
Usually, Hyunjoon would have Jaehyun carry his luggage for him, and Jaehyun would sulk and comply, but this time it’s out of the question. Jaehyun shuttles everything through and brushes Hyunjoon’s hands away when he tries to help him load the trunk of the car.
Jaehyun raises the temperature on the heater, making it so the inside of the car’s warmth is stark when Hyunjoon climbs into the passenger’s seat and shuts the door against the crisp winter night.
“So how was it?”
Hyunjoon scoffs at him. “As if I haven’t told you everything already? You were practically there with me.”
“I’m just making small talk,” Jaehyun glances over at Hyunjoon, to find him staring at the lower part of his face. “Knock it off, I’m trying to drive. Why don’t you have your seatbelt on?”
“Because you’re going to have to pull over in a minute whether you like it or not,” Hyunjoon counters. He’s watching Jaehyun’s hand as it’s wrapped around the gear shift, the way the veins bulge, his knuckles taut, his fingers so long and pretty. He’s missed his hands, holding them, feeling them cupping his face, feeling them all over him at once.
Hyunjoon leans over, and Jaehyun grips the steering wheel tighter, knuckles white as Hyunjoon tries to kiss his neck for long enough to leave a mark. Jaehyun is reluctant to push him off, once he starts.
Jaehyun looks over at him again. Bedroom eyes are undressing him this time, lazy and smug, devouring him whole. Jaehyun knows what’s going on in Hyunjoon’s mind by one fleeting glance, but it’s not like Hyunjoon’s trying to hide his feelings and thoughts, either. No, he’s wearing his desires like a crown. “Save it for when we get home,” he argues against both of them, against the want burgeoning inside of him, against how badly he wants to kiss him right here, right now.
Hyunjoon shakes his head, smiling. He leans in and reaches over, fingers pitter-pattering delicately up and down the length of Jaehyun’s thigh. He begins to rub circles into his inner thigh, going up higher, higher, higher. Jaehyun’s startled, choked gasp is music to his ears. “I’m going to crash the car if you keep doing this.”
“Pull over, then.”
“You’re crazy,” Jaehyun supplies, but he’s already doing it, already looking for someplace away from streetlights, maybe tucked away between some trees, maybe a dead-end or an empty alleyway. Because he knows Hyunjoon’s stubbornness and insistence knows no end, and he knows he’s weak-willed around him, and he knows he can’t resist him for long, least of all after a month without him. They barely made it two streets away from the airport. “Aren’t you tired?”
Hyunjoon is halfway to his lap right as the engine shuts off and the car is lulled into silence. It’s tricky and tight, maneuvering around the steering wheel and the console, but Hyunjoon finds a way, he always does. Jaehyun has to tilt his head up to kiss him, and Hyunjoon eyes him hungrily, thumbing at the corner of Jaehyun’s lip. Finally, their lips touch, red-hot in their pull for each other. The first kiss is desperate, the second kiss is sweet, and the third, and the rest, are somewhere in between.
One of Jaehyun’s hands is on the nape of Hyunjoon’s neck, playing with the short, coarse hairs of his undercut as he trails drawling wet kisses down the length of Hyunjoon’s jaw and neck, across his Adam’s apple. Hyunjoon’s sighs fill the car. Jaehyun’s other hand is on the small of his back, feeling the way Hyunjoon leans into him, presses his hips into his.
Hyunjoon begins a slow rhythm against Jaehyun’s hips, the buckle on his jeans providing friction through the thin fabric of Jaehyun’s sweatpants, causing him to harden immediately. Controlling the flow, as he always does. He’s always the one in the lead, the one in charge, the one telling Jaehyun what to do. He stops and leans back when he knows Jaehyun is being lulled into it, knowing exactly what he’s doing. He loves to tease, he loves to leave him hanging.
He looks down at Jaehyun, pressing his index finger to his swollen pink lips, as though in deep thought. He decides he doesn’t like how covered Jaehyun is, and slides his shirt off the edge of his shoulder so he can suck red bruises into the skin of his collarbones.
“Your specialty,” Jaehyun mumbles. “They’re going to be so obvious tomorrow.”
“Stop pretending to care,” Hyunjoon says between kisses. “You like to show off when I leave my marks on you,” he nips and bites until Jaehyun’s breath is cut off, to bring his point home.
“Let’s move to the backseat, I’m done playing around.” Jaehyun sounds more forceful and aggressive than he did in his head. Hyunjoon giggles, pleasure written all over his face at having Jaehyun under his thumb, wrapped around his finger so easily.
Hyunjoon tries to climb onto Jaehyun again, to straddle him, to have it his way, but Jaehyun pushes him back until he’s propped against the farther window, and Hyunjoon lets him, for once. He blinks once, twice, lazily, expectantly, as Jaehyun undoes the buckle of his belt, the zipper of his jeans, struggles to slide them down and out of the way.
“Oh,” Hyunjoon whispers, his tone unreadable.
“What? It’s only been a month, I’m pretty sure I remember how to suck your dick.”
Hyunjoon flushes, not out of embarrassment, but preening out of pleasure at Jaehyun’s defensiveness, at the way he crumbles so easily under Hyunjoon’s gaze. “You should know it like you know the back of your hand,” he adds, the line scripted and insufferable as he runs his hands through Jaehyun’s hair, smoothing it out of his face. If Jaehyun’s face wasn’t between his thighs, if he wasn’t preoccupied, he’d have rolled his eyes.
Jaehyun takes him in his mouth, tip to base at once, burying his face until it’s pressed against Hyunjoon’s lower abdomen. The action is sudden, deliberately shocking, like being submerged in cold water- Jaehyun is usually slower, Hyunjoon the impatient, finicky tease- and Hyunjoon’s hand tightens around a fistful of his hair as a result. Jaehyun moans involuntarily around Hyunjoon, the reverberations of his voice around his dick heightening the sensation.
Jaehyun’s head begins to bob as he takes Hyunjoon in and out, sucking at his flushed, deeply pink tip and tightening his lips around his base. Hyunjoon whimpers, the first of a series of small, stuttering, throaty noises.
Jaehyun’s lips are slick and swollen with saliva when he comes off of him, satisfied with how hard Hyunjoon is, knowing that leaving him halfway will make him angry and rough in his need for more.
Hyunjoon groans, guiding Jaehyun’s fingers, his long, pretty fingers, first to his lips, where Hyunjoon sucks around them, wetting them. “Get me ready, and make it quick, I can’t wait anymore,” he hisses.
“Quick will hurt,” Jaehyun argues.
“Well, quicker than your usual,” Hyunjoon argues back impatiently, spreading himself out beneath Jaehyun. “I want you inside of me, now. I’ve waited one month too long.”
They just keep making each other blush tonight, it seems. “It’s your fault, you knew what studying abroad would entail.”
“Well, never again,” he manages to say, making Jaehyun glow in spite of himself, in triumph, almost, at the reaffirmation that Hyunjoon missed him with the same gnawing desperation.
Jaehyun presses a first finger in, slowly, hesitantly, feeling how tight Hyunjoon is around it. Hyunjoon stutters and gulps, but before Jaehyun can worry, his demand begins again, no magic word, no please, because he has another favourite word tonight. “Quickly.” Jaehyun begins to crook the finger in and out, adding another, and another, until he feels the tightness begin to give away.
Hyunjoon stops him here, and demands more. “Enough with your fingers. You like me tight anyway, don’t you?”
Jaehyun slides his sweatpants down his legs. “Stop putting words in my mouth.”
Hyunjoon spreads his thighs apart and wraps his hands around Jaehyun’s back, running them up and down the taut sinews and jutting bones, pulling him down. “Words aren’t the only th-“
Jaehyun cuts him off when he presses his length into him, slow, slow, stopping when he’s buried balls-deep. Hyunjoon squirms beneath him, urging him to move.
Jaehyun is about to burst, and nothing’s even happened yet. He can feel the strain, the clench in his lower abdomen, as though a red-hot wire was running through it, making him rein in his entire body to pace himself now that he’s inside of Hyunjoon.
He begins to piston in and out of him, the sounds of skin against the sticky leather of the car. His breathing gets shallow, erratic, peppered with high sighs and murmurs as he picks up the pace.
Hyunjoon arches his back, wanting more but keeping quiet for once, watching Jaehyun’s face contort, eyes closed, listening to the sounds coming out of his parted lips.
Jaehyun keeps one hand on Hyunjoon’s tiny, narrow hip, but brings the other to his dick, which has been slapping idly against his stomach ever since Jaehyun began thrusting into him. He rubs the still-flushed, dark pink tip with his thumb, leftover saliva and pre-cum wetting it. Hyunjoon, usually one for small, low noises, groans loudly at this, and Jaehyun basks in it. In knowing Hyunjoon is coming undone in his arms.
Jaehyun is unraveling, too, but Hyunjoon finishes first, begging Jaehyun not to stop before he arches into him and digs his nails in, clawing his back. This roughness, unprecedented, a lick of pain in pleasure, is what puts Jaehyun over the edge. He shudders and spills into Hyunjoon.
They watch the rise and fall of each other’s chests, contorted uncomfortably in the backseat of Jaehyun’s car, Hyunjoon pinned beneath him. Hyunjoon’s beginning to feel the effects of doing this, beginning to feel tiredness so deep that his eyes are drooping shut.
“You’re falling asleep,” Jaehyun mumbles, sounding strangely level and satiated now that he’s regained his breath, running his dirty fingers along Hyunjoon’s cheek. “I told you you were too tired for this.”
Hyunjoon looks up at him, coy. “You’ll clean me up and take me home. You’ll carry me up the stairs and tuck me into bed, won’t you?”
Jaehyun still doesn’t have it in him to roll his eyes. He just rests his head on Hyunjoon’s chest, filling his eyes with the sight of him as he is now; bathed in the sideways-shafting light of a full moon, pale skin bruised and flushed and glistening with sweat, eyes dark and lazy, barely staying open to look at Jaehyun.
“I missed you,” Hyunjoon says. "So much."
“I know,” Jaehyun replies. “Me, more.”