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Sunshine

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       Fish was pissed and it was never good for those on the receiving end of her rage. Tonight was no exception, I was the recipient this evening. I sat in that storage room feeling lucky for the chair, I was a bit bruised from the small beating she had already given me, but I knew she wasn’t done. I had a headache as well, which is understandable, she dragged me in here by the hair. I sat there staring at the bat, the dreaded bat. There was a sense of dread hanging over me, I could die tonight. Fish could potentially kill me. I had a moment where I thought grab the bat now and beat her when she walked in, but that was idiocy. I’d never get out of the building alive. I’m going to live through this and I am going to make Ronnie pay for fucking with me. Two years of hard work and that talentless bitch fucked it all up. The dread was gone, anger had taken its place. 

        The door opened and Fish came in with Butch following behind. But I kept my eyes on Fish never take your eyes off Mama. “Do you know why you are here my little Sunshine?”

        “Yes, Mama.”

        “Tell Mama why…”

        “Because I disobeyed an order.” 

        “You disobeyed me, your Mama. I don’t mind that you brought a second girl.” She grabbed me by the chin bringing my face up to hers, But I gave you an order and you disobeyed me. Me!! Your Mama!! I’m not sure you deserve to be my baby girl anymore, Sunshine.”

         “I’m sorry, Mama.” She let go of my face.

         “Veronica is number one now at the end of the week you are anyone’s meat, understand.” I know she was also letting Butch know as well. He didn’t say anything, it would have made my punishment even worse. We learned a long time ago no free passes just because I was dating Butch outside of work. 

         “Yes, Mama.” She walked over to the bat, the clacking of her heels stabbing my ears with each step. “Arm or Leg.” She asked quietly. 

         “Arm,” I said without hesitation. I held out my left arm, when that bat came down I watched Butch. He looked away at the last second and I knew right then he didn’t love me enough to watch it happen. I felt the bone crack and I screamed. I didn’t cry though not in front of Fish, no need to disappoint Mama anymore tonight.

       She had dropped the bat, “Never disobey me again!!” 

       “Yes, Mama,” I managed before the pain kicked in as the initial shock wore off. 

       She walked back over to me, bending down to kiss my cheek. “Don’t make Mama punish you ever again. It hurts her heart.” Fish nodded to Butch on her way out of the room. 

       Butch took off his jacket and tore a sleeve off his dress shirt to make a sling for my arm. I watched him as he put his jacket back on. He picked me up and carried me out of the room. Butch kept quiet until we were in the car on the way to the hospital. “Sunny, why’d you do it?” 

      “The whole point of being number one was not having to fuck random people, I’m not meant to be a whore, Butch. And for it to be another fake BDSM enthusiast. The last one ignored the safe word. He nearly killed me, do you fucking remember that?” Of course he did Butch killed him with his bare hands. It was his fault Fish set me up with that guy in the first place. He complained about having to share his girl with randos. But I work for Fish Mooney and she reminded him by punishing me. I still believe she knew the guy was a nutjob. To just throw a person into a situation where trust had never been established. She knew. “I will not fuck someone who will make me helpless. Never fucking again.” I looked at him while he silently drove.

        I could hear him tearing up. “You can’t do that again, Fish will kill you.”

        “And you’d watch her do it,” I stared out of the window into the night. “No, you’d just look away like you did tonight.”

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       I went home with Butch after getting my cast. He had wanted to take me to my place but I told him I didn’t want to be alone. 

      "You wouldn’t be alone, baby.”

       "Fine, I don’t want you in my place.” 

       “Why don't you ever let me in your apartment? Let me in, Sunny.” 

       I glanced at him once the car had stopped its movement, “I will let you in when you can look me in the eyes as I get punished.” I hated his cowardice, it disgusted me really. I was pretty sure at this point that moving on from Butch was better than staying angry at him all the time but to escape him I had to escape Fish and well that seemed like an unlikely event.

       He kept quiet until we got inside his apartment. “You gonna stay pissed at me all night?”

       “I’m not angry with you, Butch,” I kicked off my heels pushing them under the coffee table. "I’m disappointed in you for not being brave for me when I needed it.”

        “I can’t watch you get hurt, Sunny.” I wanted a smoke so bad, but Butch found all my hidden caches of cigarettes. I’ll settle for sex then, I swayed my hips slightly as I walked over to Butch. He caught the not so subtle change in my mood.

          Butch pulled me in as I neared him, “I didn’t come home with you to be mean, Butch.” 

         “Oh?” he had a grin on his face as I went on tiptoes, he bent low for me to kiss him. 

          “I wanted to snuggle with my big teddy bear.” he kissed me back gently. 

          “Just snuggling?” 

          “You have something else in mind?”

          “Yes,” Butch scooped me up into his arms gently. 

          “Mm, show me.” I started nibbling on his neck as he carried me to his room. 

          He glanced at the cast as he laid me down on the bed. “I’ll be gentle tonight, baby.” 

         “Don’t you dare, I better not be able to walk in the morning.”

          “Damn, girl, you are going to be the death of me.” 

          I giggled as I unzipped his pants, “But it will be a fun death.”

 


 

         Sometimes I like to make Butch late to work, this morning was one of those times. “Sunny, baby, I’ve got to go…” he watched as I pulled out another condom, "Wait is that…”

         “A flavored one, yes.” 

         "It’s been months since the last time…”

         “I know. Too bad you have to go now.” 

         Butch let his pants fall to the floor, “I can be late,” He licked his lips as I popped the condom on my mouth and applied it the fun way. “God, girl.” That sharp intake of breath he gave was satisfying.

 


 

 

        I sat in bed thinking after Butch left. Fish had said the end of the week, three days. Three days for Veronica to tell all those creeps I turned down that I was up for grabs. Fuck that I’m not waiting three days. I got up and made the bed. I cleaned up all the condom wrappers that didn’t make it into the trash bin and changed the bag in it. I picked up all of our discarded clothing from last night. In the kitchen I found a surprise on the table from Butch. There was a card resting up against what looked like a jewelry gift box. I read the card out, “I didn’t forget it was our anniversary yesterday.” I felt a bit guilty because I had forgotten. Inside was a little locket shaped like a sun, it was cute but not really my style. I’d still wear it to make him smile. It contained a picture of us kissing, I remembered that Courtney took that picture. 

     I baked an apple pie for Butch and let it cool as I went and showered. I slipped into his favorite sundress, it left my shoulders bare exposing my tattoo. It was a cute little teddy bear hugging the sun. I got it on our first anniversary and I remembered how it made him smile.

     I let out a sigh because I knew someday I'd break his heart. I left my hair down because the cast made it difficult to pin up. After some trial and error I managed to get the necklace on, of course I put it on wrong and nearly broke the chain. 

      I stopped and bought some new shirts for Butch and as an afterthought I stopped and bought some cigarettes. I thought about where I would hide them from Butch as I headed to Fish Mooney's place pondering about the best way to make that back-stabbing bitch, Veronica pay.

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   Veronica had wasted no time letting people know I was going to be up for grabs. A few sleazebags were already eyeballing me hard as I walked passed. I ignored all of them as I looked for my man. 

     Butch was at Fish’s table, he must have been in the middle of saying something when he caught sight of me. I saw that big goofy grin on his face before he remembered that he was talking to his boss. Fish turned in her seat, I didn’t turn in time to avoid eye contact. I heard her click her tongue and I made haste to her table. She slid into the booth more and patted the spot next to her where I sat like an obedient child. 

     “You look delicious today, baby girl. Did you dress like that for Butch?” 

     “Yes, Mama.” She kissed my shoulder then started kissing my neck. “You smell delicious, like cinnamon and apples.”   

    “I baked a pie today.”   

    “For Butch?” I nodded, trying not to moan as she started caressing my thigh. “You smell delicious, look delicious,” she bit my neck gently and I bit back a soft whimper, “I wonder if you taste delicious.” She purred in my ear. I kept eye contact with Butch, I couldn't tell what he was thinking, smart man, kept his face neutral. Her hand slid up under the hem of my dress. 

     “She does,” Butch whispered. I shifted in my seat when she pushed my panties aside. A soft gasp escaped from my lips as she slowly slid her fingers in and out of me.

      “Is she always this wet, Butch?” 

      “Yes, Boss.” I gripped the table, I bit my lip hard to keep from crying out as she brought me to close the edge before abruptly stopping. I was breathing heavily as she pulled her fingers away shifting my panties back into place. 

      “Maybe, Mama will play with you again, when you get your spot back, would you like that, Sunshine?” I nodded still trying to catch my breath. She licked her fingers. “Then my baby girl needs to prove to me she deserves to be number one again. You know what you have to do Sunshine.” 

      I glanced up to see Veronica stroll passed the bar like she owned the place and my blood began to boil. She had said something to the dark-haired man behind the bar which made him glower at her as she walked away. He caught me watching him and his face went neutral. I felt the kiss to my cheek from Fish as I kept watching the man at the bar. “Make Mama proud. Go wait for Butch at the bar, baby girl.”  

   “Yes, Mama.”  I fixed my dress as I stood up and walked to the bar, even though I really needed to go wash up. I felt it best not to disobey a simple command. The man at the bar gave me a small smile. 

     “Hello, Ms. Sunshine.”

     “Hello, Oswald.”

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      “Veronica already being an insufferable bitch?” 

      Oswald looked around, “She never stops.” He muttered angrily. 

      “ Be a sweetheart and fix me a drink?”  

      “Yes, of course. What would you like?” 

      “Just surprise me, but make it strong. I have to make it through a day of Veronica being number one.” 

      Oswald arched an eyebrow at me, “Just one day?"

      I winked at him just as I felt a kiss on my left shoulder blade. “Baby, you wore my favorite dress.”

     “I was so mean to my teddy bear last night on our anniversary. I thought I’d look pretty for him today.” Oswald quietly ignored us as he fixed my drink. 

      Butch kissed his favorite spot again, “Do you like your present?”   

     “I love it, but I put it on wrong. Could you be a dear and fix it for me?” 

      I saw Oswald rolling his eyes and I frowned at him. “Of course baby,” Butch took the necklace off and fixed it for me. He started whispering dirty things in my ear, as Oswald placed a drink in front of me. He glanced at Butch who was preoccupied with nuzzling my neck, I could see the distaste on his face. 

     Oswald plopped a cherry in my drink and wandered to the other side of the bar to get away from us. I honestly didn't blame him I myself sometimes had the urge to vomit at the lovey-dovey shit.

      Butch glanced at the drink I'd been given he made a face after he took a sip, "Jesus, baby you can't drink this with those pain killers the doctor gave you." Of course, he read the damn warning labels.

       "One drink will be fine." 

       But he was already waving Oswald over, "Oswald, need you to fix Sunny a drink with no booze." 

       Oswald removed the perfect drink to appease Butch, "Right away Mr.Gilzean."

        First my smokes now my alcohol, I wanted to scream. Instead, I forced a smile onto my face to tell Butch about the shirts I bought him.

 


 

        After a bit Oswald wandered back over as Butch pulled back from nuzzling my neck, "I gotta take care of somethings for Fish, I'll be back before you go on." Butch leaned in and I kissed his cheek, "Skip the dance routines, baby." He looked concerned that I'll hurt myself on top of the injury our fucking Boss gave me, he winced as his eyes fell on my cast.

         "Don't worry, I'm just going to sing something fun and pretty. Wouldn't want to ruin Ronnie's debut as top girl." Another wince from my loverboy.

         "Just play nice, baby, we'll figure something out."

         "Yes, Butch." An innocent smile plastered on my face until he is out of sight.

         " Are you going to play nice, Ms. Sunshine?" Oswald's voice broke into my thoughts.

          "Fuck, no. I'm going to destroy that bitch."

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           It was pretty damn satisfying to see Veronica's face as I finished my set, dropping the mike on the ground as I passed her, "You better work, bitch." The crowd was good and worked up after I left the stage. I lingered off stage watching long enough to hear her voice falter and crack before I sauntered back to the shared dressing room for Fish's girls.

            I took my time changing opting not to put Butch's favorite dress back on, no I wasn't done with that bitch tonight. Jeans, a faded t-shirt, things I wouldn't mind getting messed up. I had just finished getting my boots laced up and was trying my hair back, when Oswald knocked on the door, "Here for a quick peek?"

            He rolled his eyes dramatically, "Don't be ridiculous. Just letting you know that Miss Veronica is doing a lousy job of pleasing the crowd."

            "Oh, is she giving them half-assed handjobs?"

            Oswald shook his head, "As crass as that is she'd have been better off doing that."

            "How sad for her," I grabbed the bag I needed from my locker before shoving everything else into the damn thing, minus the locket Butch bought me.

             "You're not putting that cheaply-made, tacky thing on again, are you?"

             "Don't be rude, Oswald."

             "It's a garish trinket from an oaf." 

             "Wouldn't say that too loud, Ossie." He's not wrong it is a tacky trinket, not cheap in its intention though…

 


 

             The pain finally kicked back in, time to take the pills again but I wanted clarity. I only took what I needed to get me through the performance which is definitely what exacerbated the quick return of the dull throbbing. I took a long drag on my cigarette right as Oswald stepped outside.

              "Smoking is bad for you, Sunny."

              "You the fucking Surgeon General now?" I snarked as I watched the cloud of smoke float away. "I already got one person trying to police my vices, don't you start shit, too." 

              "Just saying that you're a singer, don't ruin that voice."

              "I'm a whore that gets paraded on stage to bring in the clientele, I just happen to be a decent singer. We both know that I am never getting out of this hell." I took another drag as that stupid bitch Veronica came slinking out from behind Oswald.

              "Butch know you're out here schmoozing with the little bird?"

              "Heard you did a lovely set tonight, Ronnie."

              She rolled her eyes at me, "Give me one of those." Veronica pointed at my smoke.

              "Last one, " I lied smoothly.

              "Then give me a drag from that one." I handed over the cigarette and told her to keep it when she tried to give it back after a bit. 

              Eventually, she ambled down the stairs and into the night, "Don't know what Courtney ever saw in that bitch."

              Oswald tilted his head questioningly, "Was that your brother?"

              "Yeah." I used a tone that should have been taken as drop it. Oswald seemed to take the hint, just nodding. "Are you my friend?" He looked startled at the abruptness of my query.

             "Y-yes, of course."

             "Are you my friend ?" I looked at him pointedly, I knew about his little snitch sessions with Major Crimes and if he didn't watch it Fish would find out. 

            "Yes. Sunny we are friends."

            "Good. Because I am going to do something bad and I need an extra pair of hands.

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              Oswald didn't ask questions just walked beside me quietly he didn't even ask where we were going, "My brother used to have your job."

             "Oh?" I was surprised he didn't know, I've observed him listening on so many conversations. The first time I ever talked to Oswald was to tell him not to be so obvious when he was eavesdropping or he'd get caught. I never ratted him out, I think in the beginning he reminded me of my brother.

              "Yeah, he didn't want this kind of life for me," sometimes I feel guilty for ending up where Courtney didn't want me. "Life sometimes gives you shit despite another's best efforts." My brother was dead and I had to pay the bills.

             "You miss him?"

             "Every damn day."

 


 

            Less than a block away from our destination, I paused for a smoke to steady my nerves. It wasn't because I was scared, far from it but killing someone is inherently bad and that little angel on my shoulder made her last plea for me to let it go. Sorry… the thought passes as I flicked the remains of the cigarette into the night, time to add another death to my conscience.

            I didn't tell Oswald what we were doing but somehow I think he figured it out, "Is that where Veronica lives?" Motioning to the building I had been starting at.

            "Yeah, want to turn back, Os?" 

            He shook his head, "And abandon a friend?" 

            "Good."

 


 

            Oswald stood just out of sight holding my bag as I knocked on Veronica's door. I supposed that I shouldn't have been surprised that she had company, she is attractive even if her personality is shit. I just didn't expect it to be the BDSM asshole. 

           I smiled as the man in front of me recognized my face, "Oh shit, Ronnie didn't say we were having a party tonight. Happy Birthday to me." He looked so happy up until I shoved my taser into his crotch and zapped the shit out of him. As he dropped to his knees I brought my cast down fast on his head, pain shot through my arm and I ground my teeth. After tonight I would be a good girl and take those pain meds.

            Happy Birthday indeed, apparently we had interrupted their sex games, "Well this makes my work easier," Veronica was strapped down and conveniently gagged and blindfolded, Oswald made a face when he entered the room. 

             Veronica was struggling on the bed the minute she heard my voice, well I wanted her to see her executioner so I yanked off the blindfold none too gently. "I should have known that Thad was a setup." Ronnies eyes were wide with fear and it was delicious...