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the adventures of spiky twink and the burger queen

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Groupchat: fey and co.

Members: 5

Description: maya was here xoxo


*Phoenix Wright (nicknackpattywack)

*Maya Fey (burgerqueen)

*Pearl Fey (gravyravy)

*Mia Fey (boobitch)

*Diego Armando (gobo)


Monday, 8:40 AM:


burgerqueen: oh my god

burgerqueen: oh

burgerqueen: my

burgerqueen: god

burgerqueen: CODE RED CODE RED

nicknackpattywack: maya i can see your phone from here

nicknackpattywack: the teacher is gonna see it

burgerqueen: oh my god i dont care nick listen this is a crisis

nicknackpattywack: yeah, i can see you shaking, too

boobitch: maya what did i say about texting in class?

gobo: she says, texting in class

boobitch: diego stfu i can see you havent finished the maths sheet yet

gobo: thats where you're wrong

gobo: i finished it

gobo: i skipped all the questions


burgerqueen: nick

burgerqueen: NICK

nicknackpattywack: WHAT

burgerqueen: on your left, two seats down. light bue hair. really slim.

nicknackpattywack: the new girl, you mean?

burgerqueen: oh my god she's so pretty i cant

burgerqueen: nick jesus please

burgerqueen: im so gay wtf

boobitch: y'all better pay attention or im coming down

burgerqueen: miaaaaa is this how you felt with diego

boobitch: i didnt feel anything tbh

gobo: im offended

boobtich: just kidding <3333

nicknackpattywack: okay okay am i hearing right

nicknackpattywack: our little maya

nicknackpattywack: little pure burger maya

nicknackpattywack: has a crush?

burgerqueen: this aint no time for JOKES

burgerqueen:i need the DIGITS

burgerqueen: or at least a name... UGH.....

nicknackpattywack: wait isnt she edgeworth's little sister?

nicknackpattywack: transfer from germany?

nicknackpattywack: he told me something about her but idk

nicknackpattywack: aaaaand the teacher took her phone. cool.


Monday, 9:40 AM


burgerqueen: oh my god im NOT. OKAY.

nicknackpattywack: you got lucky just getting your phone back

nicknackpattywack: and now youre texting in class again

burgerqueen: well youre too

burgerqueen: hypocrite.

nicknackpattywack: damn okay chill

boobitch: last straw

boobitch: pay attenshone child

boobtich: or ill tell aunt morgan

burgerqueen: NO

burgerqueen: ANYONE BUT HER

boobitch: got her now

nicknackpattywack: woah she put that phone away so fast she almost broke it

nicknackpattywack: anywayyyyy

boobitch: you too. pay attention.

nicknackpattywack: you aint got nothin on me

boobitch: diego nick is annoying me

nicknackpattywack: ok ok never mind please delete that before he kills me

nicknackpattywack: mia

nicknackpattywack: mia im serious

nicknackpattywack: MIA

gobo: see you at lunch, trite

nicknackpattywack: shit


Groupchat: feels good to be bad

Members: 5

Description: matt if you take my chipotle again i will end you – dollie <3


*Dahlia Hawthorne (anactualdemon)

*Matt Engarde (kicknamestakeass)

*Kristoph Gavin (nailpolishpoison)

*Alita Tiala (battleangel)

*Daryan Cresend (rockboi)


Monday, 10:35 AM


anactualdemon: where the hell are yall

anactualdemon: five more seconds and im going by myself

kicknamestakeass: ah you see

kicknamestakeass: i got

kicknamestakeass: distracted

battleangel: he ran into juan and punched him

battleangel: were on our way dollie

rockboi: um problem

rockboi: fucking klavier is standing at the front door

nailpolishposion: ill speak with him

anactualdemon: im taking matt and alita and were leaving

kicknamestakeass: he he he

kicknamestakeass: get on my level BOTTOMS

rockboi: uh excuse me

rockboi: kristoph totally tops :]

nailpolishpoison: why am i even friends with you lot

anactualdemon: okay matt and alita are here

anactualdemon: and you two are not

nailpolishpoison: klavier was being a little bitch, as per usual

nailpolishpoison: ever since i said apollo isnt even that good looking hes been a salty thot

anactualdemon: ah

anactualdemon: while we wait

anactualdemon: did you hear the tea?

rockboi: spill

nailpolishpoison: oh, is it what i think it is?

anactualdemon: well you know miles edgeworth from our year?

rockboi: ye, obviously. mr von douchebag is his adoptive dad, right?

anactualdemon: yeah

anactualdemon: well

anactualdemon: his actual daughter just transferred from germany

anactualdemon: into his class

anactualdemon: and she snapped at freaking mr. Gant

rockboi: wait what, GANT?

anactualdemon: yeah

anactualdemon: even better

anactualdemon: he didnt do anythin

anactualdemon: like at all

anactualdemon: i was there

anactualdemon: he just took it and even considered what she said

rockboi: so? this concerns us, how?

anactualdemon: obviosuly her dad is scaring the shit out of the staff

anactualdemon: in conclusion

anactualdemon: we need her on our squad

nailpolishposion: huh. i guess we can think about it.

battleangel: ah, finally. they're coming.

kicknamestakeass: subway boiiiiiiis


Groupchat: this bitch empty, YEET

Members: 3

Description: vines memes and death


*Apollo Justice (imfine)

*Athena Cykes (sunshines)

*Trucy Enigmar (childofmagic)


Monday, 1: 25 PM


imfine: um

imfine: okay this is random but

imfine: u guys are my best friends

imfine: and i need an honest opinion

childofmagic: awe pollyyyyy

sunshines: hell yeee tell us anything red boi

imfine: ok so

imfine: um

imfine: do you guys think

imfine: ugh

imfine: do you

imfine: do yuo tihng klavierj licez mew

childofmagic: 0.0

sunshines: um

sunshines: what

imfine: doooo youu think that

imfine: that

imfine: that

imfine: klavierrrr

imfine: likesme?

sunshines: oh

sunshines: oh

sunshines: OH SHIT

sunshines: OHHHH SHIIIT


childofmagic: IM CALLING DAD


imfine: omg no

imfine: no no no

imfine: not like that

imfine: just

imfine: idk

imfine: i wanna be friends with him but hes popular... and all...

imfine: i

imfine: i dont know

sunshines: awhhhh polly

sunshines: why dont you ask him yourself?

imfine: bbbut

imfine: i cant just

imfine: with all his friends around and everything

imfine: i cant

childofmagic: just go and talk to him!

childofmagic: im right behind you!

sunshines: yeah! go get him tiger!

imfine: ugh

imfine: okay

imfine: maybe


Private Chat Between Athena Cykes (sunshines) and Apollo Justice (imfine)


Monday, 1: 27 PM


sunshines: hey polly

sunshines: you okay?

imfine: huh? wheres this coming from?

sunshines: idk

sunshines: youve just been talking about klavier all summer

sunshines: and as soon as we get back you get all flustered and dont wanna talk to him

imfine: its nothing really. im fine.

sunshines: okay. just tell me if you need anything.

imfine: thanks thena. but im fine.

Groupchat: fey and co.

Members: 5

Description: maya was here xoxo


*Phoenix Wright (nicknackpattywack)

*Maya Fey (burgerqueen)

*Pearl Fey (gravyravy)

*Mia Fey (boobitch)

*Diego Armando (gobo)


Monday, 2:24 PM


gravyravy: i just saw nick running from diego?

burgerqueen: oh yeah, hes trying to kill him

burgerqueen: anyway, pearly, are you coming down for lunch?

gravyravy: yes. actually, i was wondering if my girlfriend could sit with us

burgerqueen: of course!

boobitch: i still cant believe you got a gilfriend before nick could even make friends other than us

burgequeen: i guess its just because shes so cuuute

gravyravy: OwO

gobo: mia i killed him

boobitch: WHAT

gobo: i killed the spiky twink

gobo: forgive me

boobitch: on a scale of 1 to 10 how dead is he

nicknackpattywack: 15

nicknackpattywack: i thought you were blind how do you hit so accuretly

boobitch: he has a magical mask that lets him see twinks

gobo: twinks and twunks im inclusive

gobo: anyway

gobo: were coming down to the cafeteria

nicknackpattywack: more like hes dragging me even though my nose is bleeding

gobo: a small cut over your lip doesnt count as a nosebleed

nicknackpattywack: anything is possible with the power of illusion


Monday, 2:31 PM


burgerqueen: okay everyone dont make it obvious

burgerqueen: but you know how miles normally sits by himself or with von douche?

burgerqueen: look

boobitch: hes sitting with his sister?

burgerqueen: yah.

burgerqueen: but hes like right there so thats why im texting so he doesnt hear us

burgerqueen: so now im thinking

burgerqueen: if i went to the table rn how quick would von douchebag beat my ass

gobo: i give you thirty seconds

boobitch: make that twenty. he just sat down with them

nicknackpattywack: oooooh shit tea

burgerqueen: didnt you like have a crush on miles or something like that?

burgerqueen: nick what are you doing with that fork?


boobitch: nice

nicknackpattywack: even if i did theres no hope

nicknackpattywack: he like never talks to anyone

nicknackpattywack: anyway while i still have your attention look behind us

nicknackpattywack: as in behind me maya and pearl

gravyravy: is that?

nicknackpattywack: YEP

nicknackpattywack: KILL ME


gobo: am i missing something?

boobitch: its his ex

boobitch: iris fey, pearl's sister

boobitch: my cosuin

gobo: oh right

gobo: wait

gobo: wait wait wait

gobo: HOLUP

gobo: SHE'S YOUR EX?

gravyravy: i dont get the problem... sis is really nice. and she has someone else now.

nicknackpattywack: she has someone else???

burgerqueen: lol nick got ghosted

gravyravy: vera misham. they got together over summer. shes a really good artist

gobo: wait wait wati hold it

gobo: when did all of this happen

gobo: i feel like ive been here since spikey was born but apparently i know nothing????

gobo: what is life anymore

nicknackpattywack: look it was nothing serious

nicknackpattywack: we both agreed we weren't fit for each other last year

nicknackpattywack: and thats that

gravyravy: you left out the part where dollie slapped you for breaking up with her


gobo: you mean dahlia hawthorne?

nicknackpattywack: what, you know her?

gobo: yep. and i hate her.

nicknackpattywack: oof

nicknackpattywack: whats the tea robot man

gobo: its nothing

gobo: forget it

gobo: speaking of, look whos talking to the new girl

nicknackpattywack: why is dahlia hawthorne at miles's table???

nicknackpattywack: and why is von douche not doing anything?

burgerqueen: this tea is hotter than diego's coffee

gobo: i doubt thats possible

gravyravy: oh, look

gravyravy: shes moving tables

gravyravy: i wonder why

gobo: oh my

gobo: is she seriously sitting down with them?

boobitch: oooh he used italic you know he mad

gravyravy: by them you mean engarde's clique?

gobo: yep. and now miles is left all alone to talk to von douche about shakespeare or some shit

boobitch: lmfao


Groupchat: fey? more like GAY

Members: 5

Description: the mother effin fey clan boiiiiiiis


*Pearl Fey (gravyravy)

*Maya Fey (burgerqueen)

*Mia Fey (boobitch)

*Iris Fey (irishgay)

*Dahlia Hawthorne (anactualdemon)


Monday, 4: 43 PM


boobitch: i dont get the name of this chat

boobitch: i mean me and dollie arent gay

anactualdemon: bold of you to assume im straight

boobitch: you mean you hang around with dudes all day and you expect me to think youre gay

anactualdemon: um... what dudes?

boobitch: like, matt engarde, kristoph gavin, daryan crescend, should i keep going?

anactualdemon: you win big boobs

boobitch: what did you just call me?

anactualdemon: im sure your coffee addicted boyfriend can agree with me

boobitch: DAHLIA

irishgay: um

irishgay: sorry to bother

irishgay: but

irishgay: i saw you hanging out with feenie

irishgay: i was wondering how hes doing

anactualdemon: i hope hes dead since he hurt you

irishgay: dahlia dont say thatttt

irishgay: we both agreed on a breakup, okay?

anactualdemon: youre too nice to say something mean about him so i cant be sure

anactualdemon: and no one hurts my iris

burgerqueen: dahlia

burgerqueen: i saw you talking to the new girl

anactualdemon: what about it?

burgerqueen: dont make this weird

burgerqueen: but um

burgerqueen: could you maybe

burgerqueen: intrdouce me to her???

gravyravy: and this is why this chat is named this way

irishgay: join us, maya

gravyravy: irissss lets make a lesbians groupchat

irishgay: YES

boobitch: aaaand theyre off

anactualdemon: uh

anactualdemon: nah

anactualdemon: i wont

burgerqueen: but were a familyyyyy

burgerqueen: come on dollieeee

anactualdemon: as long as you hang out with coffee boy and spikey – not a chance

burgerqueen: whats the thing with you and diego anyway?

anactualdemon: none of your business.


Private Chat Between Matt Engarde (kicknamestakeass) and Dahlia Hawthorne (anactualdemon)


Monday, 5: 27 PM


kicknamestakeass: dahlia?

anactualdemon: uh

anactualdemon: what?

kicknamestakeass: nothinnnng

anactualdemon: if you have evil schemes put them on the evil chat

kicknamestakeass: i actually

kicknamestakeass: dont

kicknamestakeass: have evil plans

anactualdemon: then what good are you

kicknamestakeass: fair maiden

kicknamestakeass: i offer starbucks in exchange for

kicknamestakeass: the coochie

anactualdemon: ill take the coffee

kicknamestakeass: well it was worth a try

kicknamestakeass: memes aside

kicknamestakeass: i kinda just wanted to grab a coffee with you

anactualdemon: for real?

anactualdemon: thats so corny

anactualdemon: but sure... after school tmrw?

kicknamestakeass: YIS

kicknamestakeass: THE SEDUCER IS BACK IN TOWN

anactualdemon: stfu before i change my mind