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Even Now

Chapter Text

The suite was large and open, covering the entire top story with no walls separating any of the spaces. The longest wall was filled with floor to ceiling windows, giving a grand view of the city. A few windows outside remained lit even with the ungodly hour, but mostly it was dark, just enough to a see a few stars.

They’d had sex on a rooftop once. That had been quite enjoyable - dangerous, exhilarating, beautiful, freeing. This was better; this was like touching the stars.

Villanelle rolled off of Eve and onto her feet, grabbing Eve’s wrist to pull her up along with her. She dropped it when they reached the foot of the bed, whirling to face her, excitement coloring every inch of expression.

“Now, Eve...Show me I was right to bring you here.”

Eve blinked once and then instinct took over. She ran her nails down Villanelle’s sides as she dropped to her knees. Not very hard, just the faintest of scratches that would fade well before they were finished. Villanelle’s flowing black pants were secured only with a tie at the waist, a simple tug and they fell down around her ankles.

Eve hooked her finger around the band of Villanelle’s panties. Lace, delicate. With a sharp and sudden movement, she tore a finger through the fabric and dragged it down between Villanelle’s legs, splitting the lace in half. Her fingers barely brushed the soft skin just under the fabric, but they came away wet all the same.

Villanelle made a face. “Those were expensive, Eve.”

Eve tilted her head up to look at Villanelle and placed her hands on the other woman’s thighs, a somewhat nasty smile starting to take over as she dug her fingers in. “Too bad.”

“You better make it worth my while.”

Without warning, Eve pulled her hand from Villanelle’s thigh and thrust two fingers into her, hard and fast. She was wet, so wet; she must have been thinking about this moment for quite a while. Not that Eve could judge.

Villanelle gasped and her knees sagged for a moment before she regained her composure. Eve grinned with satisfaction. “I will.”

Villanelle sucked in a deep shaking breath and when she looked down this time, Eve could see how wide her pupils had gone in just a few seconds. She bent her fingers slightly and thrust them in again. For just a moment, Villanelle’s eyes rolled back into her head.

Eve gave a couple more good thrusts before holding pressure directly on the spot that made Villanelle sigh the most. Then, she leaned in to add her tongue, one long slow stroke across Villanelle’s clit. Then another. Then a slow circle.

At some point Villanelle couldn’t take it anymore and her knees gave out for good. Eve leaned forward in time to slip her free arm around Villanelle’s waist to catch her and ease her back onto the bed. All the while she still managed to keep her fingertips bent just so, in just the way that made Villanelle’s closed eyelids flutter.

She crawled up onto the bed with Villanelle, kneeling over her, hand still between her legs, but pausing to gaze at her face.

“Eve…” Villanelle whined. Her name, in Villanelle’s mouth, in that gasping, desperate did things to Eve and a small moan escaped her own lips in response to the building pressure between her thighs.

Eve began again, more forceful this time, adding a third finger when two were no longer enough. Villanelle’s back arched, her hips bucked. Her body begged for more, but she refrained from any more verbal pleas. She didn’t need really need to beg though; Eve was taking very good care of her as it was.

Villanelle’s eyes flashed open just before she came, hand flying up to grab Eve’s upper arm. Her nails dug in harder and harder as her breath quickened in time with Eve’s fingers. Then all at once she relaxed, breath released, every muscle giving in at once. Her head and arm fell back to the bed, eyes drifted closed again.

“Eve…” she said, again. Softer this time, like honey and history. It soothed and strangled all at once.

Villanelle seemed to come to fairly quickly. Eve never looked away from her face and when Villanelle opened her eyes, she smiled at the watchful stare. She ran a finger across Eve’s lips and pressed her hands lightly up against Eve’s chest.

They just stared at each other for a while and the connection there; Eve had forgotten how that felt. Or maybe she’d just forced herself to put it out of her mind because it was so painful to be without it. There was nothing else like it. No one else had ever brought it.

Eve sat back slightly, no longer leaning forward on her hands; Villanelle’s hands still rested lightly on Eve’s chest, watching her contendely. Then Eve surprised them both.

She took one of Villanelle’s hands and placed it lightly on her own throat; then she wrapped her own fingers around Villanelle’s. Villanelle’s breathing immediately quickened but she made no movement or protest.

“Who’s going to break?” Eve whispered.

“You are,” Villanelle said, the sheer delight of competition present in her every word.


They clenched their hands in the same moment, never breaking eye contact. Eve felt it immediately; the rush of endorphins, the somehow simultaneous feeling of panic and incredible calm. The whole world was reduced the small area in the very center of her vision - Villanelle. Villanelle’s eyes piercing straight into hers, growing wider with each fraction of a second. Her nostrils flaring. Her lips starting to tremble. Her cheeks growing pale.

Then her lips formed a silent word. “Apple.”

Apple. Their old safeword. Eve let go and Villanelle’s fingers relaxed as well. Her head turned toward the side and her eyes drifted closed, chest rising and falling with heavy breaths. Eve dropped down next to her, their breath falling into synch.

Eve wrested a hand lightly on Villanelle’s stomach and moved in close enough to press a light kiss on her neck, just below her ear. “Good?”

Villanelle smiled, eyes still closed, and reached a hand up to wind through Eve’s hair. “Yes.”

They stayed like that for a while, nothing but the sound of their breathing returning to normal. Eventually, Villanelle broke the silence, “Fine. You’re right.”

“About what?”

“You did get stronger.”

“Told you.”

“I like it.”

“You like it when I fight back.”

“Maybe. I still prefer to win, though.”

“I’m not so sure about that, love. You just don’t like to admit it.”

Eve froze. Love. She shouldn't have said that. Even if it was nothing more than a casual pet name, she shouldn’t have said it. Villanelle didn’t seem to notice though, her lazy smile entirely unchanged.

“You like it when I win.”

“Depends on the game.”

That seemed to entertain Villanelle and laughter trickled into her response, “You like all my games.” Eve didn’t respond, just gave a sort half nod of her head. Villanelle rolled over, half on top of Eve, face inches away from hers, the mischievous glint in her eye setting the tone for her next question, “Which is your favorite game? What did you miss the most?”

Eve contemplated, unable to tear herself from Villanelle’s gaze. She knew the answer, that was easy; saying it was another matter entirely. The night was already unreal, though. It didn’t matter anymore.

“You know I was always a fan of your knives. From the very first time you pulled one on me.”

Villanelle leaned in and whispered in Eve’s ear, “That was always my favorite game too.”

She was so close that Eve could feel every breath on her own lips and Villanelle’s pupils alone took up most of the center of Eve’s vision.

“Okay,” she whispered. Their lips brushed as she spoke.


“We can play. I assume you brought something fun and sharp.”

Villanelle’s eyes widened in surprise. “Always. But you really-”

“Let’s play, Villanelle.”

Delight and excitement spread over Villanelle’s face in an instant and she leapt up from the bed. Eve continued to lay there, staring at the ceiling. She expected her thoughts to start swarming her in the moments Villanelle was gone rummaging through a bag, but they didn’t. Her mind was blank save for one word: Villanelle.

Villanelle returned to the bed and straddled Eve, one hand held behind her back. She surveyed Eve for several long moments, the tension building and the silence deafening. Then in a quick flash she pulled the knife out from behind her back and twirled it between her fingers. It was on the smaller end, but Villanelle liked that for this kind of thing. She always used to say it was better for delicate work.

The knife suddenly stopped spinning and Villanelle was frozen motionless above Eve, staring at her intently. Eve was breathing was coming faster the longer she waited, but Villanelle seemed to be the picture of calm. Then, without warning, she moved in a single swift movement and pressed the tip of the knife ever so lightly against the beginning of the V-shaped scar on Eve’s left breast. “Can I?”

Eve’s eyes were wide, her breathing shallow. She could hear sound of her blood rushing in her ears. She nodded and placed her hands on Villanelles legs for security.

“I need you to actually say yes, Eve.”

“Yes.” The word spilled out quickly, easily, desperately. “Yes.”

Villanelle’s smile was wide, beyond delighted. “Perfect.”

And then the knife dug in.

The endorphin rush was different than the choking. The choking was slower, gradual, building. It had a strange almost calmness about it.

There was nothing calm about the knife. The first cut made Eve’s vision go white. The only sensations she could feel were the ringing in her ears, the sharp pain in her breast, and the very tips of her fingers digging into Villanelle. Was the knife still there or was it just the wound? She couldn’t tell.

“Breathe.” She could hear Villanelle’s voice through the ringing. She sucked in a breath through her nose and the air burned her nostrils. Letting it out was hard; her chest felt tight. “Breathe.”

She opened her eyes. The room was suddenly very bright but Villanelle’s face above her was clear through the light. It grounded her, her careful gaze was watching Eve’s every move.

“Again,” Eve said, the word tumbling out amongst her next breath.

Villanelle looked very satisfied, sort of proud, and nodded approvingly. The next cut wasn’t as overwhelming as the first. It didn’t flood Eve’s mind as much and she was able to keep her eyes open, able to watch Villanelle’s face as she carefully surveyed her work.

The second one brought the pleasure. The warm swirling feeling in the pit of her stomach, the tingling feeling across the skin of her entire body. Every nerve ending was on fire. She was hyperaware of every place Villanelle was touching her - the other woman’s hand resting lightly on her ribcage, Villanelle’s weight settled on Eve’s hips, her own fingers still clenched tight to Villanelle’s legs. The pain was there, of course, sharp and bright, but it felt good. It lit Eve’s brain on fire.

“Eve,” Villanelle’s voice brought Eve’s focus back to the world around her. “Eve, love. Finished or do you want it deeper?”

Love. “I want it deeper.”

Villanelle grinner. “As you wish.”

Two more slices, quick and efficient. Eve let her head drop back and the feeling wash over her. With closed eyes, she felt Villanelle move off of her and she reached out a hand to feel for her. She heard the sound of the knife being set down on a bedside table and then Villanelle’s hand was in hers. She slid back onto the bead next to Eve, pulling Eve against her and tucking Eve’s head under her chin.

Eve’s eyes drifted back open and she looked down at the the lines of blood on her breast. Droplets were starting to trickle off of them, growing larger and heavier at they flowed. Villanelle wrapped an arm around Eve’s waist to pull her tighter against her. With her other hand, she lightly dragged a finger through the blood, spreading it in streaks across Eve’s chest and along her collarbone.

“Pretty,” she commented, then lifted a blood stained finger and placed it in her mouth. She sucked on it briefly then pulled her finger back out with a slight popping sound and twined her fingers back through Eve’s. “You’re still wearing pants.”

“I suppose I am.”

“How did that happen?”

“Mm. I don’t know.”

“We should rectify that.”


“Don’t worry you don’t have to do anything.”

“What are you going to do?”

“You did good, you deserve a reward. Lie back, relax.”

Villanelle gently shifted Eve off of her and back onto the bed. Her fingers quickly found the the button on Eve’s trouser’s and undid it before slipping her hands into them to cup Eve’s ass. Eve hummed in contentment. Villanelle pulled her pants down in a single movement. Freed from the fabric, Eve relaxed, letting her knees drop to the sides.

Villanelle took advantage of that, kneeling between Eve’s legs and running her hands up Eve’s bare thighs. She ran one finger just under the edge of Eve’s panties and Eve shivered at the contact. Villanelle didn’t prolong the teasing, though; it wouldn’t have had much of an effect, with Eve’s head still spinning through light and clouds and fire.

Her panties were gone in a flash and then there was Villanelle. Her mouth, her tongue, her breath. Her. Every sensation had begun to blur together - the sharp pain in her breast, the feel of the blood dripping down her side, the tingling of her skin. Villanelle’s touch just added to the symphony. Every stroke of her tongue sent shockwaves through Eve’s body.

It didn’t take long - or maybe it did, Eve really had no sense of time. She’d been practically riding the edge since she’d set foot in Villanelle’s suite, maybe from the moment she’d heard Villanelle’s ringtone, if she was truly honest with herself. She’d almost come when the knife first sliced into her chest. It wouldn’t have been entirely out of the question; she’d done it once before.

When she finally came though, it was worth every moment of waiting. Her eyes flew open and she screamed louder than she ever had before. She bucked her hips, but Villanelle grabbed them and pinned her down, holding her in place to continue to receive those perfect, delicate strokes on her clit as her orgasm rose and fell and then rose again.

It took it’s time, but it did fade and Eve’s body suddenly felt very heavy against the mattress. Villanelle’s tongue slowed to a stop and she lifted her head slightly, at which point Eve realized her fingers were wound so tightly in Villanelle’s hair that the strands were cutting off her circulation. She let out her breath in a heavy sigh and untangled her fingers.

Villanelle shook out her hair and crawled up to be face to face with Eve. She look delighted, very satisfied and very pleased with herself. Her lips and chin were wet with Eve’s cum and Eve blushed when she noticed it.

“What’s wrong?” Villanelle asked.

“Nothing. You just have…” Eve wiped a thumb across Villanelle’s lips.

Villanelle grinned. “You taste good.” Eve blushed harder but Villanelle was unflustered. She leaned in and pressed a kiss to Eve’s lips, warm and deep. She didn’t pull away when it was finished, instead remained close enough that their lips brushed when she spoke. “See, you taste good.”

She began planting little kisses down the side of Eve’s neck. Eve watched her and then her breast caught her eye. The pain had faded to a dull throb but the blood was a mess. Some of it had started to dry but plenty had dripped down onto the pristine white sheets where it had been smeared around in dramatic streaks.

“We stained the bed, Villanelle.”

Villanelle shrugged, pressing a kiss to the center of Eve’s chest. “They can buy new sheets. I’m sure this place is used to it.” She sat back and looked at Eve. “I will get you cleaned up though.”

Eve tugged at her arm. “Later, I’m fine. Just lay down with me.”

Villanelle settled down next to Eve, wrapping both arms around her and tucking her face into the crook of Eve’s neck. Eve settled back against her, laying her arms on top of Villanelle’s where they crossed over her stomach and twining their fingers together. Eve’s eyes began to drift closed, the sound of Villanelle’s steady breathing and her familiar smell putting her at ease.

It shouldn’t have been so easy to come back together. The passage of time should have meant more. Things should have changed. But it was Villanelle. It was always Villanelle.