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The Mixed Feelings of Deacon Logan

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Deacon hated being at home, so loitering outside of the Circle K was his favorite pastime.

Ever since Ted moved out, things were different. Before, it seemed like Ted was always the target of Captain Logan's aggression, but now that Ted was gone, Deacon was in the spotlight. At first, he was a good kid in Captain Logan's eyes; he was on the baseball team, he got good grades, and he had nice friends. Then, Deacon became a teenager. He was endeared by the punk subculture, which made half of his wardrobe dark clothes and band t-shirts. Deacon's grades started slipping, and those nice friends were replaced by friends Captain Logan thought were freaks. Deacon had always hated his dad, but now, he hated him even more.

Captain Logan was at the station, so Deacon decided to just hang out at the Circle K, like usual. He had a cigarette in his mouth, which he somehow successfully bought with a fake ID. The cashier did give him the side eye, but she didn't say anything.

It was dark outside, and the November weather made him chilly. The leather jacket that he was wearing wasn't warm enough, but he didn't want to go home just yet. Deacon had lost track of the time, but he assumed that it was around ten or eleven. It was fine, though- Captain Logan usually didn't get home until really late on busy nights, and tonight seemed like a busy night to Deacon.

Deacon exhaled smoke from his cigarette, and crushed the butt on the concrete. He shoved the pack of cigarettes he just bought in his pocket, and then stood up. He wasn't going to go home quite yet, so he decided to take a walk around town. He kept his hands in his pocket as he walked through the streets of San Dimas.

San Dimas was never silent, but tonight, it was quieter than usual. The common buzz of cars was calm. It was always surreal to be outside late at night for Deacon. He witnessed many things, from a fight going on in an alleyway to a group of drunk men trying to lure a cat out of a tree. Tonight, though, there was no trace of that. All Deacon could listen to was the occasional car that passed by and the sound of his black boots walking on the ground. It gave him the false idea that everything was okay.

Deacon walked by a building with several posters on it, and he noticed a poster promoting Wyld Stallyns' upcoming show. He stopped and stared at the poster.

Deacon had mixed feelings towards Ted at the moment. He absolutely loved his brother, and would protect him in any way that he could, but he was just bitter. Bitter that Ted was living his best life while Deacon was stuck living with a newly divorced Captain Logan. Deacon always had a feeling that Bill and Ted would go onto do great things, but he never thought of how goddamn jealous he would be.

Bill and Ted weren't married, but it sure felt like they were. They ended up not marrying the princesses after all, and began dating each other shortly after they broke up with Joanna and Elizabeth. There was no tension between Bill and Ted and the princesses- in fact, they were still best friends and still in the same band. Their daughters lived with Bill and Ted, but with how much they saw the princesses, it was practically like they all lived together.

Deacon wished that he could just have Bill and Ted's lives. For one thing, he wished that he could kiss a guy and feel proud of it. With the threat of his dad finding out that he's bisexual, the idea of going out with another man as a teenager was absolutely terrifying. The way Captain Logan reacted to Bill and Ted getting together was bad enough on its own. Deacon also wished that he could be so chill with his exes the way Bill and Ted were. You could never tell that they were dating the princesses at one point, with how happy they were when they were together. When Deacon saw his ex-girlfriends in the hallway, he just wanted to gag.

A wave of sudden anger washed over Deacon, causing him to rip the poster off of the wall and crumple it up into a ball. He threw the poster into a trash can and moved on.

After thirty minutes, Deacon was tired. If he got home quick, he could slip into his bed before Captain Logan got home and there would never be the idea that he was gone in the first place. Deacon sped up his pace, and got home fairly quickly. Deacon got a very bad feeling when he saw that the lights were on and that there was a figure pacing around in the window.

Deacon anxiously unlocked the front door and walked inside. Sure enough, a pissed off Captain Logan was standing in the living room.

"Where the hell were you?" Captain Logan snapped. "Do you know what time it is?"

Deacon kept quiet. He honestly didn't know what time it was.

"It's almost one in the morning, Deacon," Captain Logan fumed. "And you weren't here at home like you promised."

"Sorry, dad," Deacon mumbled.

"Sorry isn't enough, this is unacceptable!" he yelled. "I thought that you were better than this!"

Again, Deacon didn't say anything. The silence was absolutely unbearable, even though it only lasted for a few seconds. Time felt like it was going so much slower.

"I thought that when Ted left, I wouldn't have to deal with anymore delinquents in my house," Captain Logan stated. "I guess I was wrong."

"Don't say that about Ted," Deacon said. "Keep Ted out of this."

"Don't talk back to me," Captain Logan hissed. "And I will say whatever I want about Ted. I don't want you turning into the disappointment that he is. He's a fa-"

"A what, Dad?" Deacon asked, his temper rising. "What were you going to call him, a faggot?"


"Well, you're too late, Dad! You've raise two sons that like men! If anyone is a fag, it's me!"

Captain Logan went silent, and Deacon felt his blood go cold. He realized that he had gone way too far, and now he was going to have to run.

Which is what he did. Deacon spun around, swung the front door open, and ran away as fast as he could. He could hear the sound of Captain Logan calling his name in the distance slowly fade away.

Deacon had no idea where he was going to go at first. He was just running away. Then, he found himself running in the direction of Bill and Ted's apartment, which he just went with. Their apartment was somewhat far, but Deacon was fast. He was on the baseball team in middle school, after all.

When Deacon won the team's final home run, he was ecstatic. Sweat may have been dripping down his forehead, and he may have been out of breath, but everyone was cheering for him as he slid against home plate. After the game, Bill and Ted took Deacon out for ice cream because they were so goddamn proud of him.

"This is for you, dude!" Ted said. "We are most proud of your excellent athletic achievements."

Deacon felt kind of like that, except the feeling of being ecstatic was replaced with the feeling of fear. He was exhausted as he got near their apartment, and he felt quite lightheaded. Then, he collapsed, right in front of the building on the pavement. He didn't hit his head; his hands and knees hit he ground first. But Deacon just couldn't bring himself to get up. He flopped over on the ground and became a puddle of sweat and tears.

Eventually, Bill and Ted must've seen him from the window, because soon enough, they were outside. They said a few things, but Deacon couldn't hear them over the sobs and his throbbing headache. Ted picked up Deacon from the concrete and brought him inside.

Ted set Deacon down on the couch and wrapped a blanket around him. Bill went off to the kitchen to bring him a drink. Deacon must've still been hysterical, because soon enough, Ted wrapped his arms around him.

"Deacon, dude, what's wrong?" Ted asked.

Deacon managed to choke out an explanation of what happened that even he couldn't understand. Somehow, though, Ted nodded as if he could comprehend Deacon's blubbering. Ted was smarter than he looked at times.

Deacon wiped his tears and sniffled. Bill brought in a cup of sweet tea and set it on the table next to Deacon.

"Well, my friend, you can always still with us until this most heinous situation is over with," Bill said.

"Yeah! We don't have anymore beds for you, but you can sleep on the couch," Ted added.

Deacon nodded and rubbed his eyes with the blanket. He grabbed the sweet tea and took a sip. After drinking the tea, Deacon could hear the sound of childish babbling from the other room.

"Do you wanna see Billie and Thea?" Bill asked.

"Sure," Deacon said.

Bill walked into the bedroom, and Deacon looked at Ted. Deacon just couldn't believe that Bill and Ted were fathers. It seemed like just yesterday that Bill and Ted were struggling with their history report; now, they were preparing to release their second album, which was looking to be pretty successful. It was more of Deacon being in disbelief that he was an uncle. His nieces were almost a year old now, and even though Deacon didn't get to visit them very often, they were still very cute in the pictures he received.

"How are your kids doing?" Deacon asked.

"They're pretty good," Ted answered. "Being a father is the most difficult of challenges, but it is very rewarding."

Bill walked out of the bedroom with Billie and Thea in his arms. It was incredible how much they looked like their dads. Thea had curly, blonde hair and blue eyes, while Billie had messy, black hair and dark eyes. Bill carefully handed Billie to Ted.

Deacon smiled at Billie, and she gave a big smile back. Deacon's grin got bigger.

"Billie is definitely the more outgoing one," Ted exclaimed. "Thea can be most shy at times."

Deacon looked over at Thea, who was holding onto Bill and looked at something completely different. Deacon couldn't help but laugh.

"You guys seem so happy," Deacon said. "I'm jealous."

"Like Bill said, you can stay over here until Dad calms down," Ted replied. "If you want, I can give him a call and tell him that you're here."

"Don't!" Deacon shrieked, and then lowered his voice. "I don't want him to find me. Or get mad at you guys."

"He is a cop," Bill said. "There is a colossal chance that he'll come here."

Deacon looked down at his lap. "What do you think he'll say?"

"It doesn't matter, dude," Ted said. "You have us."

Deacon looked up at Ted and smiled. He regretted throwing away that poster now.

At this moment, Deacon realized something big. Bill and Ted had always been there for him. When Ted was still living at home, if Deacon ever had a problem, Ted would be the one to try to fix it, even if the solution he came up with wasn't very good. When they first moved out, Deacon would always call them and rant about his problems. Bill and Ted came to every single one of Deacon's baseball games. They took him out for ice cream. They attempted to intimidate Deacon's bullies (which was unsuccessful, but still very sweet). Ted stood up for Deacon whenever Captain Logan would get mad at Deacon, once in a blue moon.

Deacon didn't have to be bitter towards his brother and brother-in-law. Right now, he was just so very grateful.

And so, Deacon came to live with Bill and Ted until he graduated. Captain Logan did end up finding Deacon, but at this point, he wasn't interested in having Deacon around anymore, which was fine with the rest of them. Deacon enjoyed having Bill and Ted around all the time, even if he had to sleep on the couch at night. He got to see his nieces grow, and he quit smoking. Deacon was able to see more Wyld Stallyns shows without the judgment of his father, and he got his grades up. Things were generally just so much better.

When Deacon graduated, the first thing he did after the ceremony was over was running over to Ted and giving him a big hug. Ted was a bit taken aback, but he returned the hug with equal strength.

"We're proud of you, dude," Ted said, grinning.

"Thank you, Ted," Deacon beamed. "Thank you for everything."

Deacon no longer had to loiter around at the Circle K for happiness. He finally loved being at home.